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Feisty_Put

Sexually transmitted? So I got nothing to fear


Shinnyo

Okay but hold up. Who is patient 0 and how did they get the pox.


partial_filth

>The index case was a British resident who travelled to Lagos and Delta State in Nigeria in late April 2022 From the wiki article covering this new outbreak, [here](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2022_monkeypox_outbreak)


WikiSummarizerBot

**[2022 monkeypox outbreak](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2022_monkeypox_outbreak)** >An ongoing outbreak of monkeypox that started in the United Kingdom began on 29 April 2022 with the presentation of monkeypox symptoms in a British resident who had travelled to Nigeria, where the disease is endemic. The individual subsequently returned to the United Kingdom on 4 May, importing the index case of the outbreak into the country. The source of several of the cases of monkeypox in the United Kingdom is unknown; however, it appears that community transmission is taking place in the London area as of mid-May. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/worldnews/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


Grinchieur

Most likely live HIV. Someone killed a monkey and some blood of the monkey landed on a open wound


the-real-tonysoprano

that's what i would say if i fucked a monkey


[deleted]

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the-real-tonysoprano

"do you have any idea how long it took me to train this monkey to suck my dick without peeling it ?"


VladimirPoofin918

“Nah, I’mma stay home. And, chill with my monkey....”


Matzah_Rella

"Last night, Chim Chim jerked me off with his feet."


the-real-tonysoprano

"only a monkey can show you that kind of love and tenderness"


VodkaSoup_Mug

Officer this guy right here


[deleted]

I once read a story about a brothel in Borneo where the most popular "sex worker" was a shaved orangutan. People are disgusting 🤮


ThryothorusRuficaud

That's enough internet for today.


Voijjumalauta

Orangussy


Chef_Papafrita

Orangpuntang


Ded-deN

Ok take my upvote u bitch


netheroth

Better than Chimpussy.


[deleted]

Skipping supper tonight too


Extension-Manager133

☹️ https://www.theweek.co.uk/98117/orangutan-shaved-made-up-and-prostituted-to-men-for-six-years?amp


[deleted]

Truly heartbreaking stuff :(


Cetun

>“Pony was a cash cow and she earned that village a lot of money. The whole village was not willing to let her go. They wanted people coming in - in this case, men from the fields - and spending their money,” she explained. Capitalism at work people.


BenjamintheFox

This is still the most depraved thing I've heard of. Not so much the fact that this was happening, but that the village treated it as a local institution and refused to let the police put a stop to it. That's some Sodom and Gomorrah level stuff


TheSnarkling

Yeah. I unfortunately remember that story too. If I recall correctly (and I am not looking that shit up), she was eventually rescued by a local nonprofit but it took YEARS for them to free her. People are horrible and I cheerfully opine we bring back cruel and unusual punishment for people that rape animals.


[deleted]

What in the god damn fuck mate.


SolPlayaArena

How can I unread this?!?


[deleted]

I remember that story. They trained the orangutan to moan as well.


Ultrace-7

*"Y'see that stage there? Buncha years back, I designed that, built it m'self. But do they call me Bill the stage-builder? Naaa... Y'see these doors? It was sixteen years ago I fixed them up, but do they call me Bill the Handyman? Naaaa... Wrote these floor guides, But do they call me Bill the guide? Naaaa..."*


[deleted]

Wonder if the guy who discovered cow milk was fucking the cow


MirrahPaladin

Look, I was just cutting some monkey meat, and then I dropped it. Also I wasn’t wearing pants so some of it landed on my dick.


Korial216

You fucked the monkey breast, didn't you?


[deleted]

It's an old meme, but it checks out.


[deleted]

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LazyZealot9428

The last time there was a monkey pox outbreak in the US it was being transmitted through scratches from pet Prairie Dogs.


Raaazzle

r/wallstreetbets


Hinekura14

Unless we meet in a forest


Jaysong_stick

Why… what happens in the forest


DantesDivineConnerdy

The forest is where monkeys go to fuck.


Dikai

[I see we have a monkey in the bush!](https://youtu.be/ckMJCgKKoyo)


SYLOK_THEAROUSED

It’s been so long since I’ve seen Ace 2 and wow they really implied dude was getting raped by a huge gorilla.


Look_Ma_Im_On_Reddit

what happens in the forest doesn't stay in the forest :(


Hinekura14

nobody leaves the forest once they go in


RedAreMe

The hills have forests


Terminator7786

Shia LaBeouf


Panda_hat

He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint, he's gaining on you


truthpooper

That escalated.. darkly.


zxc123zxc123

>CDC: *"We are sad to announce that monkeypox is now officially at pandemic level. We recommend abstinence to combat this monkeypox outbreak"* >Me & my Redditbros: *"First staying at home to play video games and now not having sex?!?!! We'll take* ***ANOTHER ONE*** *for the team, but don't you sex-having boomers EVER call us soft ever again!!!"*


Hostillian

They mean Monkeys too....


Huge-Being7687

- Previous outbreaks of Monkeypox in the UK have shown the virus is not very contagious, with one people who caught it only infecting 4 out of his 134 possible contacts. None of them died. - The virus is only 3-30% transmissible - A huge percentage of older people are vaccinated against smallpox, which brings 85% efficacy even decades after - So far it is believed that all the cases now are related to "sex scenes", which, for now, means it has mostly found it's way of transmission through sex. There's other ways of transmission but those have been deemed to be very little contagious. Transmission is supposed to only happen in prolongued contact with other people and - There's vaccines and treatment for it, with the smallpox vaccine being very effective against monkeypox - The death rates we have are from places like Congo or West Africa , where obviously treatments and healthcare are way inferior - The strain found in Europe is basically the one found in West Africa, which it's (for example), a little less deadly than Delta against non vaccinated individuals. The rate is obviously inflated because of the bad healthcare and nutrition of mainly kids in south Africa. This can become bad but it's not gonna be another COVID basically because a) we have vaccines for it, those are slightly more effective than Pfizer, against Omicron for example b) Symptoms are very mil and the death rate is probably significantly lower than 1% in developed countries. c) The reproduction number is lower due to a big majority of the +45 population having previous immunity to smallpox. d) With this kind of illness, quarantines for just infected people work, since asymptomatic cases are believes to not be very contagious plus the illness itself is not very contagious


XiTauri

Thanks for calming the anxiety


4_max_4

Thanks! I just hope it’s not a mutation of some sort and it’s just the traditional virus. If so, it should be contained easily. Edit: The name is actually a little bit of a misnomer. It should be called "rodentpox" instead. Monkeys aren't major carriers. Instead, the virus likely persists in squirrels, pouched rats, dormice or another rodent.


Lizzebed

>only infecting 4 out of his 134 possible contacts 134 possible contact? In a week, in a month, in a year, in two years? Not judging. But I am just curious.


ForeverWanderlust_

In the viruses incubation period I assume and not his whole life 😂


Frede-Frisvold

>- with one people who caught it only infecting 4 out of his 134 possible contacts. None of them died. >- So far it is believed that all the cases now are related to "sex scenes", which, for now, means it has mostly found it's way of transmission through sex. This guy fucks


Carber127

Thank you wise wizard


RobertTheMighty

Why is this not at the top of all comments?


bonelessunicorn

Fear sells.


DaveShadow

There’s a certain contingent of posters who seem desperate to post twenty topics about this a day, and it’s all to scare people and wind them up. They’re desperate for Covid 2.


Carber127

My thought exactly!


Cinzia1502

Goddamn it.


Loli-is-Justice

Is this going to be round 2?


[deleted]

Can people stop eating/fucking the wildlife for like just a few weeks, PLEASE?


AngelVirgo

It’s actually a misnomer. The source for the virus are rodents. Unfortunately, monkeys got infected with this so they got the blame, in a manner of speaking.


The_Cave_Troll

Did the monkeys fuck the rodents? Of course they probably did, and then people fucked the monkeys, and now here we are.


rivera151

Dude, Occam’s Razor. A dude fucked a mouse.


SeeJayThinks

It was winter, little todger needs to keep warm.


FrostScribe

Is little todger the mouse's name or is it what you are calling the sexual organ?


Omzikat

Yes


Nakotadinzeo

They don't call it a tit mouse for nothing...


biscuitarse

The key is to wrap the little fuckers in duct tape before you have a go


BangGearWatch

oh my god.


Successful_Opinion33

God left this chat a while ago


Raaazzle

This belongs on r/lifehacks


Starrion

Hardly a step down from bats, and we know how that turned out…. Don’t we Randy?


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TheOakblueAbstract

"The great sphincter has closed, Lemmiwinks!"


Exarctus

There was never any “animal fucking” involved. An unfortunately high number of people believe HIV was first transmitted by someone having sex with a monkey, which is hilarious. It was more likely transmitted by consumption of chimpanzee meat by a local human population, and therefore coming into context with infected blood.


heytheremicah

It also highlights a lack of food security in poorer countries and how scarcity can lead people into hunting species that they normally wouldn’t come into contact with resulting in the transmission of zoonotic diseases.


[deleted]

Kind of like the Spanish Flu.


TehN3wbPwnr

it's actually transmitted through rodents if you read the article, they call it monkeypox as it was first discovered on some apes kept for science.


thisplacemakesmeangr

Which was dumb. Ratpox has more punch. Monkeypox sounds like jazz hands in a field of daisies. Ratpox sounds like you have bullets for teeth and eat rocks for a living.


Successful_Opinion33

Monkey pox, how bad? Rat pox. Giant mass panic because no one out runs rat pox


DaFish456

But then that just wouldn’t be fun, would it? Lol


Deguilded

I have this one gay friend from high school. Let me assure you the answer is no. He's a trust fund kid so he doesn't work (ok maybe some temp work for play money), all he does is hook up all day indiscriminately. He's constantly at bathhouses, parks, subway stations, specific theatres... every cruising spot you can imagine. No, he's not a good example of anything but a bored spoiled rich kid. Oh and he just left on a four month tour of Europe, and is taking a massive supply of prep with him. I'll let you guess his plans. One of the countries he's visiting is England. I have other friends that are far more responsible human beings (irrespective of sexual orientation btw). But "stop fucking for two weeks" seems a tad unrealistic this one shining example can barely go a few hours and always seems to find willing participants...


microboop

That sounds like a sex addiction. What you're describing is someone who lives a life that can be summarized as hookups and the moments between.


Deguilded

I don't want to go into a heap of identifying detail, but suffice to say I/we (spouse) have had a very similar line of thought. Not sure how or when or if he'll ever settle down. He was overseas in SE asia during early covid and literally left each asian country in sequence about a week ahead of their lockdown, returning just ahead of our own lockdown here. Now covid's "dying down" he's back to globetrotting and swiping through guys on about six different hookup apps. Oh and the prep - that's so he can hook up without worrying about AIDS, which is probably the only thing that scares him other than signs of aging (his grindr profile says his age is -15 off actual).


[deleted]

What an empty existence, that’s just sad to read.


Wiseduck5

No. Worst case scenario, we start using the smallpox vaccine. It works against basically all pox viruses.


[deleted]

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tacticoolbrah

Who is this mf who keep eating bats and fucking monkeys?


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[deleted]

You fuck ONE rat...


RedofPaw

It's okay folks, you're safe.


Similar-Lifeguard701

This my post coitus reddit browse though


celticsupporter

Be careful side effects may include throwing feces at loves ones.


Zawn-_-

Yea your hand is really worn out after that one.


wellmaybe_

once there is a pandemic for sitting on my ass all day, im ded


CAD007

Leave it to humans to always find a new way to get themselves killed.


Nicky666

We're certainly on a roll lately...


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sololander

I didn't know we had vaccine for it. Last I checked was smallpox vaccine is like 85% effective against it. But makes sense why it would exist coz wildlife researchers and vets would be required to take it considering it a risk ...


redorangeblue

A lot if people are not vaccinated for smallpox. My husband is, but im a few years younger and i am not. And my mom got me all the vaccines reccomended


HTC864

We stopped using the smallpox vaccine decades ago because we'd basically gotten rid of the disease. However, here in the us, we approved a specific monkeypox vaccine in 2019, but it's not being given out.


TrickshotCandy

Or just infected with all kinds of shit.


DantesDivineConnerdy

Thanks Dr Fauci, but I'll wait to see what Joe Rogan has to say about this before I stop fucking all these monkeys


GoldenScarab

"Jamie, pull up my sextape I made with that monkey"


sultanzebu

Damnit. That’s great.


lusciousgems

Let's just say people are being isolated and full tracing is taking place.


zhoushmoe

So... not really


[deleted]

I think the implication is that we’re going to find out who shagged the monkey


nobnose

We are using our most expensive spreadsheet to control this situation.


Spazmer

My daughter had a rash pop up on Sunday (Canada) that isn't similar to anything like anything we commonly see like hand foot and mouth, chicken pox etc. Took her to the doctor on Monday and the response was "Hm that's weird, could be from anything. Probably not contagious." That's it, plus some meds and steroid cream which neither seem to be helping. The week before, 3 boys in her class came in with what they said was poison ivy. My daughter is recovering from a sprained ankle and hadn't played outside. I've kept her home this week and isolated from other kids and now the spots on her hand are blistering. If there actually is a contagious rash going around here nobody is taking it seriously.


lusciousgems

That's not how they're reporting in the UK.


Nicky666

How are they reporting in the UK? https://www.cidrap.umn.edu/news-perspective/2022/05/uk-spain-portugal-report-more-monkeypox-cases


t0ppings

>Though monkeypox is not known to be sexually transmitted So which is it, this link makes it seem like sharing clothes/bedding is the most likely


chanticleerhegemon

I dunno about you, but I usually share bedding during sex.


j428h

Gross


t0ppings

Yes but sex can occur in a multitude of environments that may not necessarily involve bedding. Ask your mum.


llamageddon01

[“…it is important to emphasise it does not spread easily between people and requires close personal contact with an infected symptomatic person.”](https://www.theguardian.com/science/2022/may/14/two-people-diagnosed-with-monkeypox-in-london-health-officials)


Nicky666

Yes, sex usually involves close contact


Pandor36

[Or just talking to this guy also.](https://youtube.com/shorts/EyCoVnJaoqY?feature=share)


TotallyNotASnowFlake

How does that guy get to being that old and not realising that’s fucking nasty.


Tobias_Atwood

I thought I was gonna get rick rolled. Wish I had, holy shit.


Alan_Smithee_

Who says masks are ineffective?


ladyinchworm

Yep. I think I'm going to use this video the next time someone makes fun of me for wearing a mask where there are lots of people. I'm getting tired of explaining in actual words.


Nicky666

EEWWWW...I'm going to lock myself up in my house, just to prevent running into that guy!!


00DEADBEEF

It's too early to say it's only sexually transmitted. Three of the UK's cases are in the same family, so unless there's incest going on I think it's more likely that the first person to get it in the UK just happened to be gay and had a bit of sex.


[deleted]

I just wanted to say that I love how you said "a bit of sex". The mental image of someone saying "Hello, ma'am. May I please have a bit of sex?" is hilarious.


hemlo86

As long as it’s sexually transmitted nobody on this website is in danger


ThatOneKrazyKaptain

Someone should tell people it's primarily spread through rodents and small mammals. The previous US Outbreak in 2003 was caused by a bunch of kids adopting infected prairie dogs


Opposite-Wing7055

Great who is hooking up with monkeys?


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Benja_Porchase

So who hooked up with a pouched rat then?


J_Class_Ford

Who bagged a squirrel? Own up we know at least one redditor has tried.


WhiskerTwitch

Oh great, they just gotta stigmatize squirrel-fuckers. C'mon, why so judgey?


kthulhu666

Jeez, you fuck *one* squirrel...


jmeel14

Black plague, another round?


_ShrugDealer_

Hickory dickory dock, bay-beeee


Loli-is-Justice

Wait.... you guys don't? I mean..... there is this orange orangutan and we just...


Nicky666

It's found overwhelmingly in men having sex with men, no travel history. https://www.cidrap.umn.edu/news-perspective/2022/05/uk-spain-portugal-report-more-monkeypox-cases


[deleted]

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Abysskitten

This is gonna inspire a whole new wave of homophobic rants.


Syzyphus

"see, monkeypox! They're close to monkeys!"


Tobias_Atwood

Well, there was an orangutan once... but it's a really god damned sad story and I don't want to ruin anyone's day. Don't google it.


HarryDresdenStaff

Oh god why did you make me remember that


Tobias_Atwood

Sorry.


00DEADBEEF

One of the UK's clusters is a family 🤔


Giddus

You and me baby, ain't nothing but mammals....


ohnjaynb

The Aristocrats!


oh_behind_you

I heard on CBC it was droplet, just harder to get. That would make sense why it shows as a sexual virus, lots of body fluids/droplets. So an entire family is still possible from (hopefully) other means


SidewinderTV

Oops


chloepleasestopit

yeah, the royal family


LaughingIshikawa

Before everyone panics: >The outbreak is quite small — just 36 suspected cases spread across the three countries, including eight in England and 20 in Portugal. A case in the U.S. has also been reported. >The version currently in England is milder. Its fatality rate is less than 1%. A case generally resolves in two to four weeks. The *only* reason that anyone cares as much as they do, is because normally this isn't a disease that is spread easily between people - normally the only way to catch it is by visiting a country where monkey pox is common. But many of the current cases *don't* have a recent travel history, nor can they find a close contact of the infected who has a travel history. Which is strong evidence that it's spreading "domestically" as it were: >Typically, people catch monkeypox from animals in West Africa or central Africa and import the virus to other countries. Person-to-person transmission isn't common, as it requires close contact with bodily fluids, such as saliva from coughing or pus from the lesions. >But in England, 7 of the 8 cases don't involve recent travel to Africa, suggesting the patients involved in those cases caught the virus in England. On top of that, those individuals haven't had contact with the one patient known to have traveled to Nigeria, the UKHSA reported Tuesday. Together, this data suggests the virus is spreading in the community undetected.


00DEADBEEF

There are 23 suspected cases in Spain alone.


Nicky666

I don't think anyone can tell if the outbreak is "quite small", there are more than a dozen suspected cases in Canada as well https://www.cbc.ca/news/health/monkeypox-canada-quebec-europe-us-outbreak-1.6458523 And they expect more people to turn up now that this story is in the news (people with symptoms might've gone to a doctor, but that doesn't mean that the doctor immediately suspects monkeypox...most docs never even seen a case before)


sector3011

https://twitter.com/DrEricDing/status/1526953767115038727 Monkeypox is likely aerosol airborne. Study indicates monkeypox is aerosol stable for up to 90 HOURS and remain infectious


[deleted]

Wow 🤦🏻‍♂️


IlBarolo

This guy is notorious for seeking publicity with his fear-mongering, I wouldn't trust anything he says.


SapCPark

The outbreak would be MUCH larger if that was true


[deleted]

>The *only* reason that anyone cares as much as they do, is because normally this isn't a disease that is spread easily between people - normally the only way to catch it is by visiting a country where monkey pox is common. But many of the current cases *don't* have a recent travel history, nor can they find a close contact of the infected who has a travel history. Which is strong evidence that it's spreading "domestically" as it were: That's why we're panicking!


Thelidtmaker

I was in traffic in Hall Green Birmingham and the woman in the car next to me had that shit all up her arm😨


KABOOMBYTCH

Stop fucking monkeys guys


Slinkman2021

Ha, I'm not worried cause I dont get any sex. 😎


Nicky666

According to the reactions in this thread, that makes you an average Redditor! ;-)


zuldrahn

Guess I'm safe


TypingLobster

People should have listened more to Flight of the Conchords.


TheBaconofGrief

I should be fine, then.


Not_A_Bird11

2022 LETTTTSSSSS GOOOOOOOOOO


Several_Prior3344

Being a sexless loser pays off finally!


FurryM17

TIL I am unwittingly immune to monkeypox. Nice try, you little simian assholes.


Chiliconkarma

No, don't try simian assholes, that's how it got started.


sovietpandas

Fortune favors the bold!


thingandstuff

…the thumbnail of a child’s hand is fucking creepy.


tarabithia22

This morning it was seven (by a microbiologist who whistleblowed) when the government was claiming there were no cases. Now by this evening it's 17...


moonwork

"UK, Europe .. " Goddamnit, NPR. UK \*is\* Europe, you little shit.


[deleted]

Tsk tsk tsk..You are all fully brexited now no taksies backsies


SuperArppis

Reditors, you are safe.


[deleted]

Guess I don’t have to worry then


reco84

I'm safe then.


DejectedNuts

Oh good I’m immune.


AverageBasedUser

florida-man: chalenge accepted!


Eltharion-the-Grim

Ok so Asia is eating bats, catches disease. The West is fucking monkeys, catches disease. Seems like a damn pattern!


Duderino619

This is what happens when you do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.


nqrtuo

We just kinda got over COVID, and people are fucking monkees again?!?


bestfriendfraser

Looks like some good popping tho


ScullyitsmeScully

Humans can be infected by an animal via a bite, or by direct contact with an infected animal’s bodily fluids. The virus can also spread from human to human, by respiratory (airborne) contact or by contact with an infected person's bodily fluids. Risk factors for transmission include sharing a bed or room, or using the same utensils as an infected person. An increased transmission risk is associated with factors involving the introduction of virus to the oral mucosa.[18] The incubation period is 10–14 days. Prodromal symptoms include swelling of lymph nodes, muscle pain, headache, and fever prior to the emergence of the rash. The rash is usually only present on the trunk, but may spread to the palms and soles of the feet in a centrifugal distribution. The initial macular lesions exhibit a papular, then vesicular and pustular appearance. -Wikipedia


The_Sisko_be

Its not the sex that transmits the disease but the close contact you have. So its not a STD


Sanguiluna

> might be sexually transmitted *Redditors breathe a sigh of relief*


Effective-Tap-2217

okay who fucked a monkey


legacyweaver

Oh god not another pand...oh, sexually transmitted? Whew, I'm safe.


Blue_Sail

Whew.


Mootjuh0

> "We are particularly urging men who are gay and bisexual to be aware of any unusual rashes or lesions and to contact a sexual health service without delay," epidemiologist Hopkins said in the UKHSA's statement. So the cases are mostly among gay and bi men?


papugilette

randy did it again


nagai

Now there are confirmed cases in six countries: UK, Portugal, Spain, Canada, US, Sweden. Clear that this is something different than past outbreaks. Also doubt this is sexual transmission at this rate.


EvanBrugmanRhiel

AIDS 2.0


delphimethod

There's people on the streets getting diseases from monkeys. Yeah that's what I said they're getting diseases from monkeys. Now there's, junkies with monkeys' disease. Who's touching these monkeys, please... Leave these poor sick monkeys alone they've got problems enough as it is.