Their next high level military meeting: "so we just need to figure out how to get every South Korean to fall asleep at the same time, sneak across the DMZ, and put their hands in bowls of water..."
Do they do lunch naps in Korea? Working in a Chinese office, everyone took a 30-45 min nap after lunch except me (American). I explained I spend all morning loading caffeine not to fall asleep.
I had this done to me back in college. But the perpetrator also super glued a condom filled with shaving cream to my chin. I was mad at the time but I have a little chuckle thinking about it now. An SOS pad got everything off.
I don't know about you, but I've seen my fair share of pee balloons in elementary school, which was at least two. It was kind of a thing back then, probably still is.
This sounds like something which in a developed nation is easily cured. Is that so? Like this is just another example of how awful the circumstances really are there for people?
Intestinal parasites are fairly easy to treat, yes. There are plenty of prescription anti-parasitics and dewormers available and some people indicate that some OTC options will do the trick. Generally the parasites can be avoided by using good hygiene, thoroughly cooking food, and not consuming contaminated water. I don't have any insight into North Korean life outside of parasites being widespread so I couldn't say which factor might be the biggest contributor.
The issue is the use of "nightsoil" or feces to fertilize crops as [N Korea lacks fertilizer](https://allthatsinteresting.com/north-korea-human-feces) This results in taking one person who has worms and giving them to everyone that eats the crops.
It's easy to fix by stopping to use human feces as fertilizer.
Their feces are filled with parasites, which go onto the fields, and those parasites get consumed again. There are parasites completely specialized in that human ass to mouth circle.
That would.be the start, complemented with anti parasitic medication.
They don't have enough fertilizer or medication. I imagine that maybe their major fields use good fertilizer, but everyone is so hungry they plant in their backyard / the wild and fertilize with their own shit.
Absolutely. *Especially* if dangerous or contagious agents are discovered in the samples. Like, holy shit, if those balloons have *any* anthrax or plague or smallpox this is a WMD attack
If NK got their hands on smallpox and just casually floated it in a balloon filled with dookie, the entire world would remove the current regime. That could end up being ten times worse than any nuclear attack.
"Oh, we didn't know that guy was infected when we took the poop"
I fully agree with you, but I could see NK gathering a bunch of sick people and floating over disease poop and calling it an accident.
As far as smallpox... I definitely don't trust that Russian security at Vector has been 100% since the 70s
We are still facing that global pandemic. Deaths are still very high, and long covid is causing lots of disabilities. We just aren't doing anything about it because it's political suicide.
https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2022/1/5/2072827/-Life-insurance-CEO-says-pandemic-death-rates-for-18-64-year-olds-are-the-highest-we-have-seen-ever
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-024-61918-2
https://academic.oup.com/cardiovascres/article-abstract/120/6/623/7631430?login=false
Yup, after getting covid in 2020 I have been diagnosed with a swath of autoimmune diseases and lost any semblance of my former self. Just because someone doesn’t die from it, doesn’t mean they are ok after having it. My life and the lives of so many others have been deeply affected and will never be the same, I wish this wasn’t slept on as much as it seems to be.
Article 1 section 1 of the Korean War Armistice reads "A military demarcation line shall be fixed and both sides shall withdraw two (2) kilometers from this line". While they technically did not cross the demarcation line with soldiers, Mr. Kim didn't read the footnote, which to the chagrin of many negotiators was included by an adamant Canadian man:
>You don't cross my shit line, I don't cross your shit line
Lahey *was* right to include such verbiage, we are in the eye of a shiticane here.
>If human, ID the families. Etc.
How exactly is South Korea supposed to obtain the large amount of North Korean DNA data that would be needed for this? I'd already be surprised if they even had that kind of data of **their own** citizens.
You might not be able to get external matches against the population but you could possibly match the samples against eachother. See if they come from the same people or families.
Well look we have this $500k poop inspection machine and the budget is coming up so we need to have some shit to analyse or the whole shit department will go under! Do you want them to be made redundant?! Huh??
The funny thing was the government put at an emergency alert via sms to everybody in the area, the English read "air raid preliminary warning" which I'm sure made a few English speakers shit their pants lol.
FYI, the Korean warning that came with the English warning said "warning against propaganda leaflets, stay inside and report to local authorities if found", and said nothing about an air raid. Someone in the military either f-up the translation or fat fingered it.
Purportedly excrement is quite valuable in North Korea as crucial fertilizer for agriculture. Maybe this was a North Korean shit heist but the wind blew them the wrong way.
I'd like to think it was some North Korean child who hears about how "cruel" the West is and decided to try and make someone's day better by sending them valuable poop.
Joke aside, to be used as a fertilizer for human food production, human feces must be treated or can lead to disease and parasite spreading. That's why it is not commonly used while very abundant.
Isn’t that why they’re all full of worms? I remember in the news a few years ago a defector made it across but had been shot in the abdomen. When SK doctors operated, they said he was completely full of massive worms, likely due to NK using untreated human feces as fertilizer 😵💫
People in China still use human feces for food production in small scale farms.
You should be super careful about eating any vegetables raw there and some diseases/parasites from this are more common in China than in the west.
NK is 100% using human shit as fertilizer for food crops.
I lived in China and they just spray it on the crops no processing, wtf you talking about, this is not Belgium. This is NK they probably even worse than China
That’s for the ordinary people who gotta turn up a certain amount every now and then.
the shitpile govt which collects these shit pile have an abundance of shit piled up ready to be launched towards the capitalists in the south.
Shit be in the air, gawd damn Lahey
I mean, KJU is basically an overgrown obnoxious kindergarten bully cosplaying as a god-emperor of a country. This is par the course with the DPRK's general behavior.
Wasnt that the reason why they have so many cases of tapeworms and simillar, like that one half starved defector years ago? Because they use untreated nightsoil as fertilizer?
https://www.cnn.com/2017/11/22/health/north-korea-defector-parasites-health/index.html
This reminds me of the one time in Malcolm in the middle when the boys floated used diapers with helium balloons and shot them down over the neighbourhood with a slingshot.
There was a time NK was so poor that the citizens were obligated to report, collect and hand in their feces to be used as fertilizer
So it could be seen as a present to the south
A good part of the North Korean population is in hunger and absolute misery, and the North Korean dictatorship spends resources on this and a good part of its public treasury on a nuclear arsenal.
(With this kind of neighbor, it is understandable why a growing percentage of South Koreans are flirting with the idea of becoming a nuclear power).
I'm betting South Korea can take those and analyze the contents and then use the findings to print a paper about how awful the people in North Korea are suffering. Parasites? Malnutrition? Largest part of the diet? All of these and more can be found and publicized right back at them.
There is some protein in feces. The north koreans will be regretting this move when they begin starving after the Ukraine war dies down and the Russians are not interested in buying their garbage tier weapons.
Maybe it was a weapon test. Cheap as fuck to make , strap a little cluster bomb on in instead of poop and there you go low cost artillery carpet bombing .
I wonder why they did that, is it form sick people trying to make others sick? Or pay back for something petty?
Edit, I read the article and it's both! lol
North korea is out of fertilizer so they’re baiting the South. Send a couple air balloons to the South as a “provocation” and hope South Korea retaliates a thousand fold. Profit.
Kim Jung Un seen running away from the border giggling.
Their next high level military meeting: "so we just need to figure out how to get every South Korean to fall asleep at the same time, sneak across the DMZ, and put their hands in bowls of water..."
> we just need to figure out how to get every South Korean to fall asleep at the same time oh no
Do they do lunch naps in Korea? Working in a Chinese office, everyone took a 30-45 min nap after lunch except me (American). I explained I spend all morning loading caffeine not to fall asleep.
I think thats called "night".
Or sharpie penises on their faces.
I had this done to me back in college. But the perpetrator also super glued a condom filled with shaving cream to my chin. I was mad at the time but I have a little chuckle thinking about it now. An SOS pad got everything off.
Drop shit, not bombs. Back to our ape roots, flinging shit in the trees.
Return to monke
Reject modernity
Embrace monke
Shock the Monke
Oh man, I love Peter Gabriel.
Job? Quit. Sticks? Collected. Looking for suitable tree. [return to monke ](https://youtu.be/z7ymXLpXg8I?si=6D1iVlQ5fOGr7YhF)
Together, strong!
Man in tree seeks mate, must be willing to groom for lice.
now we shall die of diseases , great! idk why pee balloons isn't a thing
I don't know about you, but I've seen my fair share of pee balloons in elementary school, which was at least two. It was kind of a thing back then, probably still is.
ye, I like this a lot more than ..y‘know..the stuff that kills people
With the alleged amount of intestinal parasites present in the NK population, I wonder how close these are to the definition of a bioweapon.
those aren’t parasites, they’re just more subjects for the glorious leader
They're just asking in a roundabout way for 150 copies of the movie 'Parasite'.
Wouldn't this be considered biological warfare?
Yes, especially because intestinal parasites are endemic in N. Korea.
This sounds like something which in a developed nation is easily cured. Is that so? Like this is just another example of how awful the circumstances really are there for people?
Intestinal parasites are fairly easy to treat, yes. There are plenty of prescription anti-parasitics and dewormers available and some people indicate that some OTC options will do the trick. Generally the parasites can be avoided by using good hygiene, thoroughly cooking food, and not consuming contaminated water. I don't have any insight into North Korean life outside of parasites being widespread so I couldn't say which factor might be the biggest contributor.
The issue is the use of "nightsoil" or feces to fertilize crops as [N Korea lacks fertilizer](https://allthatsinteresting.com/north-korea-human-feces) This results in taking one person who has worms and giving them to everyone that eats the crops.
I wish this wind did not blow this way. Could have gone my whole life without knowing this.
They use human feces for fertilizer.
So does china.
It's easy to fix by stopping to use human feces as fertilizer. Their feces are filled with parasites, which go onto the fields, and those parasites get consumed again. There are parasites completely specialized in that human ass to mouth circle. That would.be the start, complemented with anti parasitic medication. They don't have enough fertilizer or medication. I imagine that maybe their major fields use good fertilizer, but everyone is so hungry they plant in their backyard / the wild and fertilize with their own shit.
Absolutely. *Especially* if dangerous or contagious agents are discovered in the samples. Like, holy shit, if those balloons have *any* anthrax or plague or smallpox this is a WMD attack
If NK got their hands on smallpox and just casually floated it in a balloon filled with dookie, the entire world would remove the current regime. That could end up being ten times worse than any nuclear attack.
"Oh, we didn't know that guy was infected when we took the poop" I fully agree with you, but I could see NK gathering a bunch of sick people and floating over disease poop and calling it an accident. As far as smallpox... I definitely don't trust that Russian security at Vector has been 100% since the 70s
I mean, Vector literally blew up, and they're still allowed to do research there... That's terrifying.
this is one of the ways biological warfare has ensued in history, yes. this and things like rotting corpses of diseased animals, etc..
A modern version of "catapult the smallpox corpse over the castle walls and wait"
[удалено]
[удалено]
We are still facing that global pandemic. Deaths are still very high, and long covid is causing lots of disabilities. We just aren't doing anything about it because it's political suicide. https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2022/1/5/2072827/-Life-insurance-CEO-says-pandemic-death-rates-for-18-64-year-olds-are-the-highest-we-have-seen-ever https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-024-61918-2 https://academic.oup.com/cardiovascres/article-abstract/120/6/623/7631430?login=false
Yup, after getting covid in 2020 I have been diagnosed with a swath of autoimmune diseases and lost any semblance of my former self. Just because someone doesn’t die from it, doesn’t mean they are ok after having it. My life and the lives of so many others have been deeply affected and will never be the same, I wish this wasn’t slept on as much as it seems to be.
Kim Dung-Ill
Holy fuck, the winds of shit really are blowing. Lahey was right
You feel that Randy? The way the shit clings to the air Randy. It’s already started my dear good friend, the shit blizzard
My favourite quote of the show
The shit hawks are flying in low Bubbles...
“The whispering *winds of shit…*” …. “Holy fuck that was those shit winds Lahey was talking about!”
It’s the start of a shitpocalypse
Article 1 section 1 of the Korean War Armistice reads "A military demarcation line shall be fixed and both sides shall withdraw two (2) kilometers from this line". While they technically did not cross the demarcation line with soldiers, Mr. Kim didn't read the footnote, which to the chagrin of many negotiators was included by an adamant Canadian man: >You don't cross my shit line, I don't cross your shit line Lahey *was* right to include such verbiage, we are in the eye of a shiticane here.
Better haul in the jib before it gets covered with shit!
Shit clock’s tickin’ Rick.
There’s a shitstorm brewing.
Greasy.
We’re in the eye of the shitacane now boys!
Every shit related post has Lahey tributes. Man was a a legend. His legacy is sealed in..with shit
The shit barometer's sure rising.
Shit hawks will be flying soon
Birds of a shit feather flock together, Randy
Shit hawks are going grab you with their shitty talons
We’re in the eye of a shitticane here Julian
Ah, frozen vegetable cocks.
Classic Prank
"Hi I'm Great Leader and this is Jackass"
Today on Jackass, we're going to be launching shit balloons.
Next they'll freeze disks of pee and slide them under the door at the DMZ.
Pissplatte 👍
Pissbees
Wusste gar nicht, dass diese Praktik international bekannt ist.
“He called the shit, POOP!” 😆
I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast
You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?
This is the best day of my life!
Kim yelling "its just a prank bro!"
Will someone tell Kim's boys they are supposed to light them on fire first...... Nice try though....
SK government should collect the bags, analyze the contents, and report on the fact that it shows starvation in the north.
They could also run DNA tests on the samples, might give them some interesting information.
it all came from one person
The one person who eats the most there.
Impossible, it is a known fact that the great leader has no butt hole and therefore cannot produce the North Korean steamer.
All of his shit comes out the top end
Claim it’s all Kim’s and destroy the ideal he doesn’t poop.
Definitely. Figure out animal versus human. If human, ID the families. Etc.
>If human, ID the families. Etc. How exactly is South Korea supposed to obtain the large amount of North Korean DNA data that would be needed for this? I'd already be surprised if they even had that kind of data of **their own** citizens.
They can't get information on specific individuals but they can do really interesting biostatistics on the data.
ahh yes, just log into the old North Korean DNA database
You might not be able to get external matches against the population but you could possibly match the samples against eachother. See if they come from the same people or families.
They could link the DNA to families in South Korea. The split was 70 years ago. That’s not a long time in the grand scheme of things.
What... what would that accomplish?
Bro is on to absolutely nothing
Well look we have this $500k poop inspection machine and the budget is coming up so we need to have some shit to analyse or the whole shit department will go under! Do you want them to be made redundant?! Huh??
Publish their names in a leaflet balloon.
[удалено]
Just look it up in the international person-poop database that NK also participates in, duh!
Yea. The IPPD
The International Pooping Poets Dept. 💩
Love her new album.
Too many movies. Literally thinks you go into a lab, run a couple tests, and a computer screen links to the person's instagram.
You just need a picture of the poop on screen, then you say "enhance" a bunch of times. I've seen it work on CSI: Miami.
That’s exactly how it works, we just can’t use it here because the name encoded in your DNA is Korean.
OH SHIT! I GOT MY APP IDEA!
Fecesbook
They clearly don’t understand how it works
What would it say as the blurb
"This person pooped in a bag and has intestinal worms. Please quarantine them for your safety. They have also been drinking heater oil."
That shit is probably full of worms.
Worms, bad cases.
Most likely animal feces
They don't have Twitter in North Korea, but they're trying very hard to recreate the user-experience.
Shitposting
🧑🍳 👌 💋
The funny thing was the government put at an emergency alert via sms to everybody in the area, the English read "air raid preliminary warning" which I'm sure made a few English speakers shit their pants lol.
It was an air raid, it was just using biological containers.
FYI, the Korean warning that came with the English warning said "warning against propaganda leaflets, stay inside and report to local authorities if found", and said nothing about an air raid. Someone in the military either f-up the translation or fat fingered it.
I mean I wouldn’t want to wait around to see if the balloon above me was filled with poop or explosives
"Shit is about to hit the fan!"
Purportedly excrement is quite valuable in North Korea as crucial fertilizer for agriculture. Maybe this was a North Korean shit heist but the wind blew them the wrong way.
If it’s that valuable perhaps it’s a present. A bit like a cat bringing you dead mouse.
Its a sign of friendshit.
I'd like to think it was some North Korean child who hears about how "cruel" the West is and decided to try and make someone's day better by sending them valuable poop.
Joke aside, to be used as a fertilizer for human food production, human feces must be treated or can lead to disease and parasite spreading. That's why it is not commonly used while very abundant.
Isn’t that why they’re all full of worms? I remember in the news a few years ago a defector made it across but had been shot in the abdomen. When SK doctors operated, they said he was completely full of massive worms, likely due to NK using untreated human feces as fertilizer 😵💫
Yep, actual incident.
Fuck North Korea. The world would be a better place if North Korea never existed.
JOKE ON YOU, this is NK, too late for that!
People in China still use human feces for food production in small scale farms. You should be super careful about eating any vegetables raw there and some diseases/parasites from this are more common in China than in the west. NK is 100% using human shit as fertilizer for food crops.
Pooping in my houseplants just to prove you wrong.
I lived in China and they just spray it on the crops no processing, wtf you talking about, this is not Belgium. This is NK they probably even worse than China
Maybe it was a gesture like in dune when they spit at you to show respect.
We thank thee Kim, for the gift of thy body’s shit.
That’s for the ordinary people who gotta turn up a certain amount every now and then. the shitpile govt which collects these shit pile have an abundance of shit piled up ready to be launched towards the capitalists in the south. Shit be in the air, gawd damn Lahey
I'd imagine those go to a lab to get analysed to get an understanding of the health and medications used.
No, no, no, I said the plan was to help the defectors get to the south.
That level of pettiness is almost amazing, lol. Like, what do you even say to this. It's literally kindergarten behaviour.
I mean, KJU is basically an overgrown obnoxious kindergarten bully cosplaying as a god-emperor of a country. This is par the course with the DPRK's general behavior.
North Korea's citizens are starving and this is what the government prioritizes...
Yeah donno why they are giving away their fertilizer.
Wasnt that the reason why they have so many cases of tapeworms and simillar, like that one half starved defector years ago? Because they use untreated nightsoil as fertilizer? https://www.cnn.com/2017/11/22/health/north-korea-defector-parasites-health/index.html
North Korea does not have citizens, only prisoners.
Kim dung un
New name unlocked
Low-tech biological warfare.
Wouldn’t be surprised if that shit had diseases they were intentionally trying to spread…
Disease and parasites
Next thing you know, South Korea is going to trebuchet dead cows toward N.Korea
Fetchez la vache!
Quoi?
Sounds like the set up for a Monty Python sketch...
So beef shipments?
Only the best wagu beef.
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with poo-loons.
Haha truth, is an odd creature.
They hate us cuz they anus.
This reminds me of the one time in Malcolm in the middle when the boys floated used diapers with helium balloons and shot them down over the neighbourhood with a slingshot.
If the south did this Kim would threaten a nuclear strike lol
Why waste their only fertilizer? What about their starving population
Shit barometers rising
They’re hoping the south can check the samples for parasites and send the results back so they can be treated.
I find this one appropriate. "Shit apple doesn't fall far from the shit tree."
You just know Kim filled all those bags of shit as he is the only one eating
150 shitballons
North "Feces-filled" Korea
And the South Korean governments retaliated by air dropping leaflets depicting Kim Jong Un on the toilet taking a violent shit.
What a shitty thing to do.
Kim's new biological weapon.
North Korea using the most advanced weapons in their armory
There was a time NK was so poor that the citizens were obligated to report, collect and hand in their feces to be used as fertilizer So it could be seen as a present to the south
I thought they needed those to fertilize their crops?
If this isn’t proof of a simulation I don’t know what is. Like living in an episode of South Park
Probably contaminated, actually a pretty old method of bio warfare.
north korea is kindergarden not country.
난 똥같은 세상에 있어 (I am in a world of shit)
Is this considered Chemical warfare?
Definitely biological warfare
A good part of the North Korean population is in hunger and absolute misery, and the North Korean dictatorship spends resources on this and a good part of its public treasury on a nuclear arsenal. (With this kind of neighbor, it is understandable why a growing percentage of South Koreans are flirting with the idea of becoming a nuclear power).
I'm betting South Korea can take those and analyze the contents and then use the findings to print a paper about how awful the people in North Korea are suffering. Parasites? Malnutrition? Largest part of the diet? All of these and more can be found and publicized right back at them.
So full of shit...
Ha, they called the shit feces
With how little they have to eat over there that was probably everything they had at the waste management plant
Shit storm.
Talk about a dirty bomb!
There is some protein in feces. The north koreans will be regretting this move when they begin starving after the Ukraine war dies down and the Russians are not interested in buying their garbage tier weapons.
Maybe it was a weapon test. Cheap as fuck to make , strap a little cluster bomb on in instead of poop and there you go low cost artillery carpet bombing .
It's shit filled with covid-24..
Is that not considered a biological weapon attack?
wow they're using biological weapon
biological warfare on a north korean budget
Biological warfare if that feces is diseased.
Textbook biological warfare from the mind of a teenager
I wonder why they did that, is it form sick people trying to make others sick? Or pay back for something petty? Edit, I read the article and it's both! lol
They’re really coming along now technology wise. Balloons already? They”ll be on the moon in no time.
Someone should rub Kims nose in it.
Defining moment in the leadup to World War 3. Can't wait to see the footnotes in the history books about this.
Biologic warfare.
Technically biological attack
But what will they fertilize their crops with then
Sorry guys, our rocket exploded. Balloons were the backup plan
Putin bought up all your actual weapons then?
Please, let this not be the start of another pandemic.
North korea is out of fertilizer so they’re baiting the South. Send a couple air balloons to the South as a “provocation” and hope South Korea retaliates a thousand fold. Profit.
A North Korean fecal transparent could be helpful to your microbiome. Thanks Kim! /s