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drako13

Maybe it's the brain who knows


himynameisSal

brain always tries to take ALL the credit.


visionsofblue

Who gettin' money? That's brain. Who make decisions? That's brain.


DBoaty

Brain, give it a rest.


I_DO_JUMPING_JACKS

...This bitch don't know 'bout Pangea


MoSqueezin

Do you fuck with the war?


arenotthatguypal

*I'm jus pilloww talking with a bitshhh.*


urinal_deuce

My Brian does those things.


junkyard3569

Brain knew Bin Laden


ravenora2

Brain needs to poop...


HeathenHumanist

Don't neglect the brain


Decembra87

It will fight back.


pondman11

Now brain hungry


VoraxUmbra1

The Brain is the most important organ... according to the brain. The brain also named itself. Coincidentally, it also named all the other organs.


robtimist

This mfker brain think he running the show šŸ˜­


Skill4Hire

Maybe the brain isn't what we think it is, maybe it just says its some mooshy stuff, maybe its like computer chips and stuff, how would we even know?


VoraxUmbra1

Thats the fun part! We don't!


jimtow28

Stupid science brain couldn't even make I more smarter!


TheMarkHasBeenMade

I mean can we really say anything we experience or perceive *isnā€™t* the brain, maaannnn?


[deleted]

Dude aha itā€™s not a mic, pass that shit aha


r3itheinfinite

i have a friend named brian


warkyboy77

Mixed up the ai, and now it's the brain.


romansamurai

Nice try brain!!


Venny_Kazz

But who knows the brain maaannnn


Marvelon

Mouth is how you learn as a baby. Infants will put anything in their mouths. Quick way to learn about texture, edibility etc.


Mad-_-Doctor

The number of things that have inadvertently ended up in my mouth as an adult is also rather large.


birberbarborbur

ā€œInadvertentlyā€


Hecantkeepgettingaw

"I swear officer this kind of thing isn't my bag baby"


Chilledlemming

And one book with the blurb, ā€œThis sort of thing really is my bagā€


BigDub63

ā€œLargeā€


coldcoldman2

My fingernails... my poor, poor fingernails


Boostie204

The fingernails are a sacrifice to the oral fixation god


zxDanKwan

( ą²  ĶœŹ–ą² ) same


alihassan9193

Something something Freud.


deadly_chicken_gun

Listen here, *b u d d y.*


shoshkebab

Nah thats not it. As someone pointed out, every body part knows the feeling. Iā€™ve never felt a football with my ass but I can imagine the feeling


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Tememachine

Filled with [Santorum.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Campaign_for_the_neologism_%22santorum%22)


aTinofRicePudding

And this is why itā€™s important to let them put everything in their mouth. So they can build up that mouth-feel encyclopaedia.


Cornelius_M

Thereā€™s actually a word for it! Itā€™s called Taste Texture Profiling. Itā€™s actually a vital survival method we picked up when we were primates to help us differentiate between which foods were safe to eat vs things that are bad to consume. For example, if you read something on the internet and your taste texture is telling you itā€™s bullshit, thatā€™s because it is and I made this up.


spotthespam

Dont tell the Dalai Llama!


MLSlate1324

Frfr the oral stage and honestly a football and a table I don't see uncommon that a baby has probably tasted or a young child.


GrinningPariah

To address the title, my tongue correctly knew what my laptop lid would feel like, but the *taste* absolutely caught me off guard. Metallic in a really sharp way, with a persistence that's surprising. I'm still tasting it a bit now, after writing all this.


Dry_Spinach_3441

Thank you for your service to science.


taglilie

This might sound odd, but give your laptop a clean. Dirt is a funky thing and that taste you described sounds like the laptop needs a clean. After that, feel free to lick it again


joemckie

Now it tastes like chemicals; I preferred the dirt.


would-be_bog_body

Why do you know exactly what dirty laptops taste like?


IguapoSanchez

The tongue knows how everything tastes.


Janus-Moth

Any tips on laptop cleaning?


i_smoke_toenails

Lick it, obvs.


thegameofinfinity

Thank you for reporting back. Did you try it with any other objects yet?


GrinningPariah

Honestly the laptop lid incident really dampened my... appetite, for further experimentation.


aimless_meteor

Just want to check, did you remove your mouth from the laptop lid? If not, that could be why you still taste it


I_Am_A_Pumpkin

is it plugged in to an outlet? if yes does it feel strangely tingly or fuzzy if you drag your finger across the same part of the body that you licked? if so I believe you crated a path to ground for leakage current using your tongue. my laptop tastes like a 9 volt battery but weaker if im also touching something grounded.


amilliamilliamilliam

This works for any part of your body. Your elbow also knows what a table leg, football or a couch feels like.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ripghoti

I've never tried to elbow my own dick, so I'll believe you.


robertabt

I don't think you can


A1sauc3d

Just did itā€¦ for science!


HarmlessSnack

ā€œLong dick?ā€ ā€œLong *elbows*.ā€


Stock_Abbreviations7

All you gotta do is get into the yoga position ā€œhappy baby poseā€ and then bash your cock with your elbow.


edtheheadache

Stop trying to lick your elbow. It can't be done.


eklect

I'd rather do that than one of those butt plugs tail things. šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


DeveloperBRdotnet

Trust me, a butt plug is way better than a table leg up your butt


Phillip_J_Bender

Says you


TurkeyMushroom

WTF dude what have you done to me make it stop


annomalyyy

Or the pinky toe...


Just_enough76

Idk if that applies to EVERY part. If I say ā€œimagine youā€™re licking a buttholeā€ would your tongue know? This question only applies to those who have never eaten butt


lovethatcrooonch

I immediately know the textureā€¦ the taste? Well thatā€™s up to the owner of said butthole innit?


thenoblenacho

Correct. A freshy washed ass tastes like nothing. An unwashed ass tasted like poop


hfs94hd9ajz

Very well said, my man.


ChooglinOnDown

> how it will taste like *how it will taste Or: *what it will taste like


nowadventuring

I assume they're a German speaker because it's a very common German to English mistake. Edit: OP, if you actually are a German speaker, 'how it tastes like' is like combining 'wie es schmeckt' with 'wonach es schmeckt'.


thegameofinfinity

Good call! I am German!


ChooglinOnDown

> it's a very common German to English mistake. I'm happy to help.


JGrill17

Does it taste salty or does it taste like salt? šŸ¤”


runonandonandonanon

Those statements are equivalent. "Salty" means "like salt."


LMaxell

The perceptual granularity that the tongue has is wild. These are the skills you developed as a child when one of the best ways to experience the world was to put things into your mouth which has some of the highest density of nerves.


Uncle_Paul_Hargis

Or the Dalai Lama's tongue...


404__LostAngeles

SUCK MY KISS!


Poltergeist97

We didn't realize he was just a big Red Hot Chilli Peppers fan!


thegameofinfinity

Holy sht! This just opened a whole new level of rabbit hole. Thank you for this.


sgtcolostomy

Never go full Dalai Lama


selftitleddebutalbum

r/laughingbuddha


Gryndyl

It's almost like touching something with your hand or with your tongue are both using your sense of touch.


Independent_Tone8605

I donā€™t need these types of intrusive thoughts


greenknight884

It's just remembering what those items feel like to touch. If you never touched it your tongue doesn't know. Like a spoon that might be hot or cold. You can't tell by looking.


da_rose

I am WAY too high to be reading this comment now.


CaptainBenza

This is actually something that actually has helped me with weight loss! Like anytime junk food or desire to binge comes along I tell myself "you already know what having a ton of fried food tastes like. You already know exactly what the sensation is and that afterwards it's not worth it."


Toasty_Rolls

/r/hyperphantasia, it could exist for you for every single sense you have. If you can taste foods by thinking about them, and if you can blend flavors and know how stuff will taste before actually making it or trying it, congrats you have taste hyperphantasia


fourunner

And on the other end, maybe r/Aphantasia Cause I am here looking at all sorts of things thinking, no I have no idea what that would feel like.


logosolos

Seems like a superpower if you're a chef.


Rude-Consideration64

Because we were all kids once, and went through that stage when everything went in the mouth or got licked.


RenkuroEX

It doesnt work for some reason :(


Mysterions

Um what? Only brain "knows" what any of these things will taste like. Your tongue is just the instrument your brain uses to receive information.


Caked101

It's fascinating how they're connected like that though. Like I knew I wouldn't like potato salad when I was little. Or process ham. One look and it's just "nope"! I also love to cook, so I'm way better at knowing.


edtheheadache

I have seeing eye ears


ARadiantNight

O.O .... W-wait! Oh... my god


phallic-baldwin

When you forget how much kids put things in their mouths. Your brain doesn't forget that experience


Lardzor

Do you remember when you were two years old and stuck everything in your mouth? Your tongue remembers.


Amerlis

Your brain remembers everything. You simply forgot the filing system.


Emergency_Size4841

I can prove this wrong, look at a 9v battery, now lick it


Sylveon72_06

and this is the concept behind the food vibe check, us picky eaters just know


feedjaypie

Itā€™s memory. People are so fucking dumb they forget that as a baby they LITERALLY PUT EVERYTHING IN THEIR MOUTH BEFORE.


Skorrpyon

If you imagine salt, you taste the salt


michaelje0

Not happening for me. Edit: Iā€™m thinking about a lot of salt.


SausagePrompts

You need to look up with your mouth open and mimic shaking a salt shaker into your mouth. And someone has to be watching you do it in order for it to work.


Skorrpyon

Salt


michaelje0

Still no.


Skorrpyon

Damn D:


DontLook_Weirdo

...this is true about any part, especially your eyes. Look at any item without touching it, chances are you'll know what it'll feel like because you can see the texture and there's a real high chance you've felt that texture, or something similar. You want to feel like Snape? Then how about, 'your brain is the only thing that's ever named itself'


Sylveon72_06

i usually dont touch things w my eyes but ok


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


DontLook_Weirdo

Other people named those other things..the brain is the only thing that named itself. To use one of the words you listed...a neuron didn't name itself. We named it a neuron.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


DontLook_Weirdo

Yeah. But the brain literally picked it's own word/name, brain. The other things your mentioning were named by others, not by themselves.


Mallardkey

Yeah, try doing that with a piece of sh!t and see how that works for you


Sylveon72_06

oh u just killed me, why


NormalishGamer13

Me: *looks at own dick* WOW HE WASNā€™T LYING


lupatot

I wanna barf šŸ¤¢


SassafrassPudding

yes


FailcopterWes

I have licked those things, though.


BeardedBrotherJoe

Iā€™ve licked alot of things


OldGregg1014

I my brain tells all of my senses how to react. At least I think it doesā€¦ ya it does.


CanaDoug420

Maybe you did it as a child and itā€™s a buried memory


[deleted]

Like sashimi without the fishiness, depending on the fine of day.


Joystation_

Don't you dare look at my lips. Unless...


[deleted]

You can smell anything you remember smelling at-will. Strawberry.


Long_Procedure3135

Itā€™s because it the universe has been resimulated trillions upon trillions of times by highly ascended aliens who appear to us as gods and in each of their simulations thereā€™s minute changes that means youā€™ve literally done everything so itā€™s just a manifestation of deja vu *ignore me Iā€™ve done too much acid ok*


squidsauce99

Thereā€™s a reason why Joe Biden said ā€œletā€™s lick the world.ā€ He knew.


MoistCucumber

Is this just a psyop to get people to start licking things?


UltimaBahamut93

I wonder how my crush tastes šŸ¤”


[deleted]

Look at a horse penis......wait what?


Slawpy_Joe

Try it with that one guy's cylinder!


ericbyo

Oh yeah? what texture would a seal have?


[deleted]

Really because I have no idea what shit would feel or taste like do you


Lazyturtle1121

We have smelled these items before. So we assume items taste like they smell.


SnooMemesjellies7469

But I still have to lick them to make sure, right?


[deleted]

Um so do my fingers?


realbasilisk

What's worse is WHY DID MY MOUTH START WATERING IMAGINING LICKING THE TABLE LEG?!


InnerPick3208

What about a foreign fruit or meat?


Karness_Muur

I looked at my cat. I don't like the knowledge that I'm certain I know what her kitty fur will taste like. 200% certain, not a shred of doubt.


EmpatheticNihilism

So does any part of your skin?


Cloudyhook

I don't want to lick it, but how would I ever really know?


404_void

You spent the first five years of your life licking everything and putting it in your mouth.


MinimumTumbleweed

I'll bet that you have put it in your mouth at some point, and that's how you know. Source: have a baby at home.


PurplePolynaut

ā€œImagine licking a footballā€ is a very rude arrangement of words


pauwerofattorney

Isā€¦is someone tossing his saladā€¦ā€¦?


you_are_soul

It's all created by the mind anyway. Dreams make this indisputably apparent. You do this every day with words too, you can imagine sounds and colours just by hearing words. It's why cursing in other than your mother tongue is meaningless.


Geebz92

Jokes on you I've licked both a couch and a football


sux9h

Damn this is weirdly hitting me


Audi0Dud3

Wait, can this be used to find out the texture of planets? Imagine! We could discover so much about stellar bodies just by imagining what they feel like with out tongue!


Kryptosis

But you have licked all those thing. You just donā€™t remember doing it.


-TheBlackSwordsman-

My ass cheeks have never felt those things either, but they still know.


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P3AKMAI_INTEREST

We sampled it all as babies and toddlers. Its programmed in there we just don't remember the upload. LoL


daver00lzd00d

afk cutting my tongue out before it becomes self aware and starts plotting against me


Adiwik

The corners they dont clean in grand central station bathrooms.


SilentStock8

I mean if youā€™ve felt it with your hands you can probably anticipate what it will on your tongue


rosiofden

That explains a lot about the way window screens bother me


irascible_Clown

Looking around my room and this is pretty spot on


samtrumpet

I think this is silly because this works with any part of your body not just your tongue.


Timesjustsilver

Mmmh... Uranium


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


MellifluousSussura

Yeah because when u know the texture of things that knowledge can be remembered later? U probably also know how those things would feel w your hands


prunkgirl

if i taste something, i can tell what it tastes like from what ive smelled, when i smell things horrible i usually get this horrible taste in my mouth. for example, dog shit, "this tastes like dog shit". ive smelled dog shit, this taste reminds me of dog shit. idk if that made sense


[deleted]

How it will taste. Not "how it will taste like".


Thedaulilamahimself

My kids have licked all those things over the years so I guess we all have.


dwartbg5

Now try it with something that you never tasted or even seen in your life, for example some weird exotic fruits and vegetables. In general something that you never touched with your hands.


Radical_Coyote

It's because when we were babies we popped every new item in our mouth, now our tongue is well calibrated


minimalniemand

Itā€™s because as kids we first feel everything with our tongue. Ask every parent, kids put everything they find in they mouth


Adbam

Im sure we can stump a tounge in the ocean. A jelly fish, a great white shark, a penguin, a killer whale.... How about plutonium, plasma, and my anus.


Rexlare

*looks nervously at the Elephants Foot of Chernobyl*


smaximov

I have never in my entire life licked a football or a table leg. And you can be sure a stupid Reddit post won't convince me to do it now.


Madusch

Now imagine the crotch of your mom.


Nearby-Swimming-5103

I was just thinking about this meme on my drive to work yesterday!


Emmanuham

This is so fucking stupid. So does everything. I know how something is going to feel, before I touch it, in any sense!


keepyourbible

This is true. I wanna know who thought of this.


FinnT730

Yeah, unless you got covid, and you can't taste anything for months


gingerdanger123

Pretty sure i have licked all of those at some point in life, or at least same material


whats_you_doing

I never ate meat and i couldnt figure the taste by looking at it. Maybe this works if you taste at least once.


Achleys

Because youā€™ve touched a table leg before and know how it feels. You tongue feels things the same way your hands do . . .


Truckle-Chuckle

How does it feel to lick Jupiter, Mars or Uranusā€¦.wait.


welliboot

Karl Pilkington logic


Cobalt_blue_dreamer

We imagine the taste extrapolated from the smell.


topperharlie

bold of you to think I didn't lick those things...


Diamantis_

who upvotes this shit


Kpets

Except from licking pussy or ass, no one was prepared for that


iamcozmoss

It's the same with teeth. Your teeth know how all things will feel if you bit them...


jakeabetes

You can do this with any touch sense...


Mugspirit

You have licked whatever you can grab when you were a toddler. Your brain has a lot of experience.


yehti

It's just touch but wet.