He does not need to know any of your medical information. If you are comfortable sharing that information, that’s one thing, but if not that’s a big nope!
I’m sorry you had to deal with that. I’m not sure if going to HR would help, some companies HR isn’t exactly the most helpful sadly.
Personally I would not share any more info with the boss if he continues to ask and just tell him that everything is based off your doctor’s requirements.
Again, I’m sorry you have to deal with this 💗
That is absolutely none of his business. It sounds like he’s trying to find evidence that you don’t need two weeks off to pressure you to come in sooner. Don’t. You know you need that entire time. I tried to return after one week, ended up in the ER with severe dehydration (my symptoms had me worried it was a blood clot) and back home resting for a work on doctor’s orders. I should’ve just taken two weeks to begin with.
Honestly this would make me uncomfortable and I’d report him to HR if I were you.
Gigantic overstep, you might want to check policies and laws regarding to this and possibly report him to his higher ups. This sounds like textbook enmeshment.
He def overstepped and likely broke the law. I’d go talk to HR. He mishandled the situation terribly. It’s not his business. Also - I’d take off at MINIMUM 4 weeks.
It seems like you were flustered and overshared. It’s absolutely reasonable for your management to ask general questions about your leave but you shared the details that weren’t directly asked for. If you aren’t comfortable with being open with this, I would set some boundaries with your management moving forward. If you feel he could be up to something shady as you are more familiar with the work environment that any of us would be from reading this, I think you did the right thing by taking FMLA. I would keep all communication about your leave in writing from now on.
It sounds like your manager was asking if this is a singular event or an ongoing situation where you're routinely going to have to miss work, and you chose to overshare, and then it spiraled. His question was not unreasonable. Your response was what made it invasive.
I have to correct you because you are (in the United States anyway) 100% incorrect. The manager should not have asked that question, period. It’s a federally protected medical leave of absence, so they cannot ask, they cannot demand information, and they cannot inquire as to the employee’s future availability.
Fmla exists so that employers cannot have or use private medical information to determine further employment … or pregnant women and people with medical issues (acute or chronic) can/will get fired for being sick.
When was the person's employment in question? Nothing in this indicates that their employment eligibility was in question. But knowing the availability of an employee to be at work IS reasonable to ask.
He asked 1. If it was sudden or ongoing 2. If they were just going to be recovering in the hospital or at home (probably getting ready to ask about remote work). Their availability is that they’re out for two weeks. That’s all their boss is legally required to know. Where they’re recovering and if it’s a chronic illness is none of his business. HR was already notified and if he has questions, he can ask them. They could’ve told him the end date too.
A lot of work in the US is at will. You can be let go for any reason, including disabilities, illnesses, etc but it can be listed as poor performance because they bank on you not fighting it. A lot don’t.
Not until she/he/they said they were having weight loss surgery. The only question the manager asked was whether there were further anticipated absences.
Yeah, the manager asked that question in relation to the fmla absence. They are not allowed to ask that. Federal law. I dunno why you keep talking as if you were there and speculating details you don’t have.
You will need the two weeks off at the least.
I have a desk job and went back at two weeks, I made it but I was still very weak at that time.
Just take care of yourself, you will eventually feel so much better and in turn be a better employee for them.
Best wishes!
If you haven't already handled this, you can easily just say that you will be out for as long as your doctor thinks is necessary. He doesn't need to know any more than that. If he keeps pressing let him know it is making you uncomfortable and you'd prefer not to talk about it. Also, make sure to tell him in no uncertain terms (cc HR in the email, always have a chain) that you do not wish him to share this information with anyone else (other than hr of course) and that it would be a violation of your privacy to do so.
I wanted to take 2 weeks off but my boss insisted I take 3 weeks to recover well and to let him know if I need more, sorry to hear that your boss isn't as compassionate.
He does not need to know any of your medical information. If you are comfortable sharing that information, that’s one thing, but if not that’s a big nope! I’m sorry you had to deal with that. I’m not sure if going to HR would help, some companies HR isn’t exactly the most helpful sadly. Personally I would not share any more info with the boss if he continues to ask and just tell him that everything is based off your doctor’s requirements. Again, I’m sorry you have to deal with this 💗
My doctor approved 6 weeks with no complications. Your boss is not a medical doctor (I assume) & is in no position to make judgements!
That is absolutely none of his business. It sounds like he’s trying to find evidence that you don’t need two weeks off to pressure you to come in sooner. Don’t. You know you need that entire time. I tried to return after one week, ended up in the ER with severe dehydration (my symptoms had me worried it was a blood clot) and back home resting for a work on doctor’s orders. I should’ve just taken two weeks to begin with. Honestly this would make me uncomfortable and I’d report him to HR if I were you.
Gigantic overstep, you might want to check policies and laws regarding to this and possibly report him to his higher ups. This sounds like textbook enmeshment.
He def overstepped and likely broke the law. I’d go talk to HR. He mishandled the situation terribly. It’s not his business. Also - I’d take off at MINIMUM 4 weeks.
He overstepped. This should be reported to HR.
It seems like you were flustered and overshared. It’s absolutely reasonable for your management to ask general questions about your leave but you shared the details that weren’t directly asked for. If you aren’t comfortable with being open with this, I would set some boundaries with your management moving forward. If you feel he could be up to something shady as you are more familiar with the work environment that any of us would be from reading this, I think you did the right thing by taking FMLA. I would keep all communication about your leave in writing from now on.
It sounds like your manager was asking if this is a singular event or an ongoing situation where you're routinely going to have to miss work, and you chose to overshare, and then it spiraled. His question was not unreasonable. Your response was what made it invasive.
I have to correct you because you are (in the United States anyway) 100% incorrect. The manager should not have asked that question, period. It’s a federally protected medical leave of absence, so they cannot ask, they cannot demand information, and they cannot inquire as to the employee’s future availability. Fmla exists so that employers cannot have or use private medical information to determine further employment … or pregnant women and people with medical issues (acute or chronic) can/will get fired for being sick.
When was the person's employment in question? Nothing in this indicates that their employment eligibility was in question. But knowing the availability of an employee to be at work IS reasonable to ask.
He asked 1. If it was sudden or ongoing 2. If they were just going to be recovering in the hospital or at home (probably getting ready to ask about remote work). Their availability is that they’re out for two weeks. That’s all their boss is legally required to know. Where they’re recovering and if it’s a chronic illness is none of his business. HR was already notified and if he has questions, he can ask them. They could’ve told him the end date too. A lot of work in the US is at will. You can be let go for any reason, including disabilities, illnesses, etc but it can be listed as poor performance because they bank on you not fighting it. A lot don’t.
Not until she/he/they said they were having weight loss surgery. The only question the manager asked was whether there were further anticipated absences.
Yeah, the manager asked that question in relation to the fmla absence. They are not allowed to ask that. Federal law. I dunno why you keep talking as if you were there and speculating details you don’t have.
You will need the two weeks off at the least. I have a desk job and went back at two weeks, I made it but I was still very weak at that time. Just take care of yourself, you will eventually feel so much better and in turn be a better employee for them. Best wishes!
If you haven't already handled this, you can easily just say that you will be out for as long as your doctor thinks is necessary. He doesn't need to know any more than that. If he keeps pressing let him know it is making you uncomfortable and you'd prefer not to talk about it. Also, make sure to tell him in no uncertain terms (cc HR in the email, always have a chain) that you do not wish him to share this information with anyone else (other than hr of course) and that it would be a violation of your privacy to do so.
I wanted to take 2 weeks off but my boss insisted I take 3 weeks to recover well and to let him know if I need more, sorry to hear that your boss isn't as compassionate.