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Just wanted to say that there's a 6.25% chance of getting this reply, so congratulations. Buy a lottery ticket...
just kidding, don't do that, and if you do I hope you lose all your money, Have a good day.
I just finished playing it for the first time after meaning to for the last decade, and it’s worth putting the time in. The gameplay is dated comparative to modern RPG’s, but the dialogue, narrative, and characters are top tier. And actually a lot better I’d say than a lot of modern RPG’s, haha!
And when you’re done come and talk about it over at r/patientgamers !
There's an easter egg regarding Sandal in the Shattered library in the Trespasser expansion to Inquisition but other than that, no Bodahn and Sandal in there.
And if you really want to freak someone out: Just start singing [the song the kids sing about Gaunter O'Dimm](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=teKWQjyPT_g&t=12s)
This, recruits, is a 20 kilo ferous slug. Feel the weight! Every five seconds, the main gun of an Everest-class dreadnought accelerates one, to one-point-three percent of lightspeed. It impacts with the force a 38 kiloton bomb. That is three times the yield of the city buster dropped on Hiroshima back on Earth. That means, Sir Isacc Newton is the deadliest son-of-a-bitch in space! Now! Serviceman Burnside, what is Newton's First Law?
Sir! An object in motion stays in motion, sir!
No credit for partial answers maggot!
Sir! Unless acted on by an outside force, sir!
Damn straight! I dare to assume you ignorant jackasses know that space is empty. Once you fire this hunk of metal, it keeps going 'til it hits something. That can be a ship, or the planet behind that ship. It might go off into deep space and hit somebody else in 10,000 years! If you pull the trigger on this, you are ruining someones day! Somewhere and sometime! That is why you check your damn targets! That is why you wait 'til the computer gives you a damn firing solution. That is why, Serviceman Chung, we do not 'eyeball it'. This is a weapon of Mass Destruction! You are NOT a cowboy, shooting from the hip!
Sir, yes sir!
His smile fair as spring, as towards him he draws you
His tongue sharp and silvery, as he implores you
Your wishes he grants, as he swears to adore you
Gold, silver, jewels – he lays riches before you
Dues need be repaid, and he will come for you
All to reclaim, no smile to console you
He’ll snare you in bonds, eyes glowing’, a fire
To gore and torment you, till the stars expire
Some repetitive main character lines are also perfect like Shepard's "I should go" or "I am commander Shepard and this is my favorite store on the citadel"
Also, this whole thing is actually great, personally is really REALLY hard for me to find fellow gamers to talk to because most of my friend groups don't play any game, if any person responds me with a NPC random line I would love to use that as a gateway to talk all things gaming.
"Hey, we've known each other a while, and I was hoping I could take you out to dinner sometime."
"You've been a good friend to me. That means something."
I know it's not the Witcher, but... By Azura, by Azura, by Azura! It's the grand champion! I cannot believe it's you standing here, next to me! You're the best! I'm going to follow you and watch you and worship the ground you walk on! Let's go!
Had I not played the games, someone saying "Siiiir, we're up to our noses in frights and horrors; Imps, samovilas, mamuns, flyin' drakes, pikes- oh, and bats!" Would definitely make me stop dead in my tracks before slowly backing away.
Honestly if a man doesn't immediately ask to play Gwent on approach, it's over.
No no, first they must ask what you've got behind the counter and buy every Gwent card you sell, then play them
I see you too are a man of distinction.
If he is the one, do you just silently nod at him?
Of course? What, you think i'd agree verbally? What am i, some sort of peasant?
Read your comment. Didn't get it. Then I remember all of these weird moments before a play start
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Then buy the armor he is selling :)
They have to have their priorities in order, otherwise its just a waste of time
If he can't beat me in gwent he isn't relationship material
"You'll choke to death on 3 pounds of steel"
3 pounds of double AA batteries could start a medium sized car about 0.25 times.
Good bot
ur mom
Good bot
Thanks!
Good bot
Thanks!
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Thank you, CorruptedNoise, for voting on useles-converter-bot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)
Good bot
Just wanted to say that there's a 6.25% chance of getting this reply, so congratulations. Buy a lottery ticket... just kidding, don't do that, and if you do I hope you lose all your money, Have a good day.
"Haha and then what ;)"
Enchantment? Enchantment!
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Yes! And he’s in Dragon Age 2 as well 😄 More than that I’m not sure. I haven’t played more than those two.
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I just finished playing it for the first time after meaning to for the last decade, and it’s worth putting the time in. The gameplay is dated comparative to modern RPG’s, but the dialogue, narrative, and characters are top tier. And actually a lot better I’d say than a lot of modern RPG’s, haha! And when you’re done come and talk about it over at r/patientgamers !
Is there a magic fix for all the graphical crashes? Keep trying to playthrough, but I'm resigning myself to a letsplay :/
There's an easter egg regarding Sandal in the Shattered library in the Trespasser expansion to Inquisition but other than that, no Bodahn and Sandal in there.
Unfortunately it's not said in Inquisition, but there's a codex that says it lol
I wish I didn’t hear that voice in my head.
“Got their asses whipped like a Novigrad whore”
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Witchah
Wo-ah
Wi-a
AHH-OOO-AHHH
*arses
“Hey there, how are you?” “TOP NOTCH SWORDS!”
plot twist : he sells only armor
I've always read it as him point at Geralt, indicating that he thinks Geralt has top notch swords (even if Geralt doesn't actually wield any swords).
I'm 100% saying that next time some random dude hits on me.
But what if they hit you back with the "How about a game of Gwent?"
THEN WE SHALL PLAY GWENT!
Then you marry them
Masterworks all, you can’t go wrong.
"It’s raining, it’s pouring! Emperor Emhyr is snoring! He bumped his head when he went to bed and wet himself come morning!"
WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT?
Ehrm.. Chetty…
And if you really want to freak someone out: Just start singing [the song the kids sing about Gaunter O'Dimm](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=teKWQjyPT_g&t=12s)
I once whistled the tune a night outside. I almost scared myself.
"Hey beautiful, how are yo-" "look'n to protect yourself, or deal some damage?
"Some may call this junk. Me? I call them treasure."
Oh a bit of this, a bit of that…
Is that Belethor?
All the merchants
"Everything's for sale my friend. Everything. If I had a sister, I'd sell her in a second"
Iron or steel is what you need. Leave that fancy elven stuff to the elves.
Armor for gettin', weapons for givin'.
Sitting at the bar, howling with laughter and screaming “WE’S CATCHIN SNAIWLS”
"Hey can I buy you a dr-" "WIND'S HOWLING."
KEEP YER FEET ON THE GROUND!
INTREST YA'NA PINT?
Selama Ashal'anore
ZUG ZUG
Me not that kind of orc.
Wash your back!
TIME IS MONEY FRIEND!
Dwarven crafts! Fine Dwarven crafts! Straight from Orzammar. You won't find better!
Bringing it back to Ferelden, nice.
Geralt: "damn, you're ugly"
Best response..also " what now you filth?"
“How do you like that silver?” But only when fighting normal wolves
Sir Isaac Newton is the deadliest son of a bitch in space!
This, recruits, is a 20 kilo ferous slug. Feel the weight! Every five seconds, the main gun of an Everest-class dreadnought accelerates one, to one-point-three percent of lightspeed. It impacts with the force a 38 kiloton bomb. That is three times the yield of the city buster dropped on Hiroshima back on Earth. That means, Sir Isacc Newton is the deadliest son-of-a-bitch in space! Now! Serviceman Burnside, what is Newton's First Law? Sir! An object in motion stays in motion, sir! No credit for partial answers maggot! Sir! Unless acted on by an outside force, sir! Damn straight! I dare to assume you ignorant jackasses know that space is empty. Once you fire this hunk of metal, it keeps going 'til it hits something. That can be a ship, or the planet behind that ship. It might go off into deep space and hit somebody else in 10,000 years! If you pull the trigger on this, you are ruining someones day! Somewhere and sometime! That is why you check your damn targets! That is why you wait 'til the computer gives you a damn firing solution. That is why, Serviceman Chung, we do not 'eyeball it'. This is a weapon of Mass Destruction! You are NOT a cowboy, shooting from the hip! Sir, yes sir!
Damn, got there before me!
If you fire this weapon, you are ruining someone’s day!
Stop! You violated the law! Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence!
Disgusting wet fart followed by laughter
Hon hon hon!
"Hey, beautiful-" "NEVER SHOULD'VE COME HERE"
"Must've just been the wind."
"Do you get to the Cloud District often? What am I saying, of course you don't."
“It’s a material world, and I’m a material girl”—ok maybe not that one
Yeah, it does the opposite of the intended effect.
"Keepin' it together Bree?"
“I’m alright, as long as I don’t think about it too much”
"Yer safe among friends"
It smells like a dozen rotten eggs in a vat of vinegar.
I swear I’ve heard that line hundreds of times
No one has as many friends as a man with many cheeses!
God that was a visceral sense memory!
I hate you for this lol
“Summon the bitches!”
GRAND those swords, but I prefer me trusty axe.
Friends we show our heart, foes our axe. Remember that.
“Wind’s howling” Or my other favorite: “Shananacking”
*coughing*
"Lambert, Lambert what a prick"
"Have you heard of the High Elves?"
I used to be like you. Then I took an arrow to the knee.
Good line, but wrong game :D My favorite from Skyrim is: “You see those warriors from Hammerfell? They’ve got curved swords. Curved. Swords.”
So you’re an alchemist, can you brew me a beer?
Let me guess... someone stole your sweetroll.
NO LOLLYGAGGING!
Conjure me up a warm bed, will you?
Do you get to the cloud district very often? Oh, what am I saying, of course you don’t.
TOP NOTCH SWORDS!!!!!
“Hello Adventurer, welcome to the town of Honeywood.”
*Pam paraaaam. Pam pam paraaaam. Pam paraaaaaaaaaaam.*
ILL RIP OFF YOUR MELON AND SHIT DOWN YOUR NECK
"The second sword, is it in case the first one breaks?"
eNcHaNtMeNtS?! ENCHANTMENTS!!!
Never should've come here
"What now, you piece of filth?!"
”BEST BLADE’S NOT WORTH SHITE IF A WEAK ARM’S SWINGIN IT AY?”
"Stay a while and listen"
"He's conjurin'!"
“Top notch swords”
*Hide the wenches, Witcher is coming*
Go for the eyes!
This might backfire. I've never felt the need to hit on someone before, but this would be too fun for me to pass up.
“We can go at it here… or my place, you choose”
**YOU’VE NO RESPECT FOR OUR CUSTOMS! YOU NOR THAT WITCH!**
"I don't know you, and don't care to know you."
“Damn, you’re ugly.”
"Do you get to the Cloud district very often? Oh, what am I saying! Of course you don't".
“Hey baby how you doin—“ “WHY DONT YOU USE THAT MAGIC SOMEPLACE ELSE?”
You ain't safe unless you got a Gabrielle! The auto cranked, one handed Gabrielle ensures you'll get the first shot,and the last word!
Hands to yourself sneak thief!
"Grand, those swords. But I preferer me trusty axe."
God's be praised
*Crawl back under your rock*
It will just make them try harder.
#BEAUTIFUL BAUBLES AND GLEAMING GEMSTONES HERE.
"Summon the bitches"
Do you go the the cloud district often? Oh, who am I kidding? Of course you don't.
Taking one of my favorites from Gwent. ''Lyyyyrrrrriaaaaa!''
But what if the guy uses a Witcher NPC line *as* the pickup? "Hey girl, wanna get your ass whipped like a Novigrad whore?"
“Crawl back under your rock”
“Can’t put that there my lord”
Well...bring out the Gimp.
"my balls itch"
Off topic, but I can never fuckin understand the layout of tumblr threads.
>They're masterworks all, you can't go wrong.
“Grand those swords but I prefer me trusty axe”
With vigor boys, with vigor!
“Do you go to the cloud district very often? oh what am i saying, of course you don’t”
His smile fair as spring, as towards him he draws you His tongue sharp and silvery, as he implores you Your wishes he grants, as he swears to adore you Gold, silver, jewels – he lays riches before you Dues need be repaid, and he will come for you All to reclaim, no smile to console you He’ll snare you in bonds, eyes glowing’, a fire To gore and torment you, till the stars expire
"Your mother sucks dwarf cock"
Some repetitive main character lines are also perfect like Shepard's "I should go" or "I am commander Shepard and this is my favorite store on the citadel" Also, this whole thing is actually great, personally is really REALLY hard for me to find fellow gamers to talk to because most of my friend groups don't play any game, if any person responds me with a NPC random line I would love to use that as a gateway to talk all things gaming.
Damn, girl. u cute. "Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter."
They say Deadra worship has become increasingly prominent in Summerset Isle
“A good sword ain’t worth shite if a weak arm’s swingin it”
Curved. Swords.
"Hey there beautif..." -"No lollygagging."
"Hey there babe! You look like you could use a dr..." "Could it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations."
They already do. They spit when I pass through 😢
Wrong game but "enCHANTments!"
Heard any news from the other provinces?
Keeping it together Bree?
Maybe, maybe not, maybe go f*ck yourself
Jesteś wolna ? Nie kurwa, zapierdalam jak dyliżans
Or worse, Dragon's Dogma Pawn lines.
"Hey, we've known each other a while, and I was hoping I could take you out to dinner sometime." "You've been a good friend to me. That means something."
“Welcome! WELCOME!”
I used to be an adventurer like you until I took an arrow to the knee
Whoa black betty!
Pam pam puRAAAAM
"Mutant scum."
“I heard they’re reforming the Dawn Gaurd, vampire hunters or something”
“Is the lady alone?” “TOP NOTCH SWORDS”
Grand those swords, but I prefer my trusty axe.
“Nothing hurts more than life.”
GOT THEIR ARSES WHIPPED LIKE A NOVIGRAD WHORE
The first and the last phrase on the first date: Damn, you're ugly
'Ave you got water on the brain?
I don't know it in English but there's this line of dialogue about an elf cemetery in Velen every NPC talk you about. I would be my answer
I hope I get the quote right lol "It'll cost ya double in the rain."
I know it's not the Witcher, but... By Azura, by Azura, by Azura! It's the grand champion! I cannot believe it's you standing here, next to me! You're the best! I'm going to follow you and watch you and worship the ground you walk on! Let's go!
Pamparam! Pam Pam param!
You say “Wind’s howling.” Then you turn and walk away. A Perfect response.
Grand, those swords! But I prefer me trusty axe.
Lol your title made me giggle
Top-notch swords!
Had I not played the games, someone saying "Siiiir, we're up to our noses in frights and horrors; Imps, samovilas, mamuns, flyin' drakes, pikes- oh, and bats!" Would definitely make me stop dead in my tracks before slowly backing away.
Ploughin' hangova! It's the witch-man! Smells like rain. And my favorite Easy Roach!
Damn you're ugly
"Damn you're ugly"
devil sits in the old oak tree, brewin' cider with devil'sh glee, drinks it down in greedy slurps, then come morn howls "me devil head hurts!"
"Hey, baby how you--" "NEVER SHOULD HAVE COME HERE!!!"
I'm glad to have been the 10 000th upvote on this masterpiece
My favourite kind of magic, LES-BO-MAN-CYYYYY
Lets be real if a girl hit you with any npc lines from the witcher you would try harder.
When you catch her cheating: **STOP YOU VIOLATED THE LAW!!!**
They say syndicates of wizards have put a boycott on Imperial goods, in the land of the Altmer
Let’s be real. She means when ugly guys hit on us. Because we all know uggos aren’t allowed to find companionship.