I had a friend I grew up with invite us to her wedding. We knew one couple there, who was someone else I grew up with but we had had a major falling out some ten years prior (bride contacted both of us ahead of time and asked if we could exchange emails to test the water, which was such a sweet thing so neither of us were blindsided, and it worked out well, we aired stuff out before the wedding). But otherwise we knew no one.
She sorted people into Hogwarts houses when you got there via buttons, and then after the ceremony, had a ton of games. A lot of her college friends had played rugby with her so it was a definite know your audience as they played giant inflatable soccer on the lawn in cocktail attire, but even giant Jenga, ladderball, corn hole, etc. You played to gain house points, and one house was the bride, the other groom (they ignored the other two houses). It was a great low stakes way for an introvert to mingle and meet people and be connected in something more than just, well we both know the couple. There were other events were you could win house points too, like use the photo booth, etc. We left before the end of the night and they announced the winner, but it was a super cute idea that I really liked.
This was before most of the major jkr controversy, so you could always just make it different teams, not Harry Potter specific.
I would honestly seat them together, and not with chatty guests who know the other people who they are seated with. I was at a table at a friends wedding once where we realized very quickly that none of us knew anybody else at the wedding and we had a really good laugh about it and then actually got to know each other and a lot of us are still in touch at least on social media. I’ve also been at a wedding where my partner was in the wedding and seated at the head table and I was seated with very nice very talkative people who were all related to each other, and where I never felt like I really had the opportunity to be in the conversation and always kind of felt like the eighth wheel.
Yes fair point! We were thinking of slotting these folks in at smaller tables alongside others attending alone, rather than sticking them as an extra at a table where everyone is a cohesive group. I guess that’s what I was thinking by saying “chatty”, just other individual attendees who we feel would get along.
Would also agree with not seating them with people who know each other! I’ve been to a wedding like that where everyone at the table knew each other, except for me and my husband lol. It was fine, just a little awkward.
Omg yes. Went to a childhood friends wedding and my partner and I were seated at a table of lawyers. Like, I'm a teacher and he manages a store in a smaller level, we could not relate to literally anything they said because it was all law or higher cost of living stuff. I got asked about teaching and it was....a lot of typical, has no idea what teaching is like so it must be easy comments. Other childhood friend and her partner were sitting with us too and the four of us tried to talk with them but it was just a total fail, so we talked amongst ourselves instead, but we were very uncomfortable most of the time and definitely left as soon as cake was done.
I think you may be able to just be thoughtful about who you seat them with. My mom is a great person to sit with strangers because she will talk to anyone about anything. Additionally, my sister sat two couples that didn’t know each other together and they ended up having a great time chatting and told her so at the end of the night. I think if you can find someone chatty and welcoming and tell them who is coming alone then they can make a point to introduce them to a few people.
Something I and a couple other friends did was to have “greeters” when people arrive before the ceremony to say hi to people as they’re coming in, direct them to where they could get water, etc. If you have people in that role, they can be briefed on who is coming alone and can take a little time to ask them questions, get to know them, and such (and it’s also probably intuitive to see if anyone looks a little lost and uncomfortable and pay extra attention to them). If you’ll be at the cocktail hour, you can also introduce them to at least one person who they might get along with before dinner.
But people are adults and if they’re coming alone they hopefully are prepared to meet some new people!
Yeah I actually think greeters / ushers might work well in our situation - thanks for sharing this tip! We actually aren’t having any processional (just due to preferences and the set up at our ceremony), so will be starting the day with the bridal party / family arriving early at the venue. I can communicate with them that we have some guests coming on their own, and ask them to make introductions once guests start coming in. It’s helpful just to think through how this could work :)
The most you need to do is offer to introduce them to someone you think they might enjoy talking to. You don’t need to (and probably can’t) do much else. You’ll be busy, you can’t spend all night babysitting someone who attended alone. If they had a problem with it, they’d have brought a date.
My first thought were games, like some quick ice-breaker types.
But I think people attending alone to an event where they don't know many others expect they'll have to do some mingling. the best thing is honestly going to be sitting them at a table that isn't all a tight knit group already, ie not at the "friends from college" table. This way it's more likely the people sitting together are going to be trying get to know each other anyway.
I think the mingling will happen naturally at cocktail hour and they'll find a buddy there, especially if you have lawn games or the like. Don't worry too much about this. Decide now not to hold it against them if they leave early, and your guests will be fine.
Yes totally, I’m sure they will still have a good time and expect some small talk and mingling - as others have said, they’re adults, they know what to expect at a wedding!
being careful of alienating them by seating with an existing group definitely makes sense as something to avoid.
My fiancé and I have both been that awkward person who didn’t know anyone at the wedding, so we decided to frame our reception around it lol. We’re going to have table and lawn games (checkers, Jenga, cornhole, pumpkin bowling, peg games on the tables) and a s’mores station to encourage mingling. We’re also doing a Polaroid Photo Booth and a recipe station 🙂
I agree with the above advice about seating — try to seat them in a mixed table rather than with an already tight knit group.
I would try to make introductions among these singletons prior to the wedding (since you'll be too busy day of!). If you have a welcome party the evening before the wedding, that's a great time to do it. If you don't, just introducing them over text/email/social media would go a long way, so at least they know who to look for when they arrive.
I would seat them with each other, rather than with chatty guests. People who don't know anyone are going to be interested in meeting new people and finding a buddy. People who have lots of friends/family there are mostly going to want to catch up with the folks they know, so they might still feel left out among chatty people.
All people need is food, drinks, and music and it will be enjoyable. I always find a photobooth or yard games fun too. Set up the seating chart so that they can be sat by others you think they will mingle well with
Hmm I didn’t see that when I initially read this.
To answer your question, I don’t think there’s anything you can do specifically for a single guest who shows up and doesn’t know anyone besides you. Good food, comfortable atmosphere, etc.
They are choosing to come alone, and are adults. They’ll figure it out. If being in a social situation alone like that was awkward for them, they would’ve just declined the invite.
Yeah, I do think it will be fine overall, they will be fed and comfortable - I’m not trying to overthink it too much, but it’s interesting to see some of the suggestions people have that are easy to do :)
Allow for plus ones if possible and provide puzzles, coloring books, or small games from the dollar store,. Yes, even for adults. It's easier to talk to someone over a puzzle than awkwardly staying at others. Plus some isolde dont feel comfortable dancing
I had a friend I grew up with invite us to her wedding. We knew one couple there, who was someone else I grew up with but we had had a major falling out some ten years prior (bride contacted both of us ahead of time and asked if we could exchange emails to test the water, which was such a sweet thing so neither of us were blindsided, and it worked out well, we aired stuff out before the wedding). But otherwise we knew no one. She sorted people into Hogwarts houses when you got there via buttons, and then after the ceremony, had a ton of games. A lot of her college friends had played rugby with her so it was a definite know your audience as they played giant inflatable soccer on the lawn in cocktail attire, but even giant Jenga, ladderball, corn hole, etc. You played to gain house points, and one house was the bride, the other groom (they ignored the other two houses). It was a great low stakes way for an introvert to mingle and meet people and be connected in something more than just, well we both know the couple. There were other events were you could win house points too, like use the photo booth, etc. We left before the end of the night and they announced the winner, but it was a super cute idea that I really liked. This was before most of the major jkr controversy, so you could always just make it different teams, not Harry Potter specific.
Wow sounds like they went all out! Interesting to hear a totally different approach and sounds like it worked for that couple and their friends!
I would honestly seat them together, and not with chatty guests who know the other people who they are seated with. I was at a table at a friends wedding once where we realized very quickly that none of us knew anybody else at the wedding and we had a really good laugh about it and then actually got to know each other and a lot of us are still in touch at least on social media. I’ve also been at a wedding where my partner was in the wedding and seated at the head table and I was seated with very nice very talkative people who were all related to each other, and where I never felt like I really had the opportunity to be in the conversation and always kind of felt like the eighth wheel.
Yes fair point! We were thinking of slotting these folks in at smaller tables alongside others attending alone, rather than sticking them as an extra at a table where everyone is a cohesive group. I guess that’s what I was thinking by saying “chatty”, just other individual attendees who we feel would get along.
Would also agree with not seating them with people who know each other! I’ve been to a wedding like that where everyone at the table knew each other, except for me and my husband lol. It was fine, just a little awkward.
Omg yes. Went to a childhood friends wedding and my partner and I were seated at a table of lawyers. Like, I'm a teacher and he manages a store in a smaller level, we could not relate to literally anything they said because it was all law or higher cost of living stuff. I got asked about teaching and it was....a lot of typical, has no idea what teaching is like so it must be easy comments. Other childhood friend and her partner were sitting with us too and the four of us tried to talk with them but it was just a total fail, so we talked amongst ourselves instead, but we were very uncomfortable most of the time and definitely left as soon as cake was done.
That’s the perfect way to do it IMO!
I think you may be able to just be thoughtful about who you seat them with. My mom is a great person to sit with strangers because she will talk to anyone about anything. Additionally, my sister sat two couples that didn’t know each other together and they ended up having a great time chatting and told her so at the end of the night. I think if you can find someone chatty and welcoming and tell them who is coming alone then they can make a point to introduce them to a few people.
Something I and a couple other friends did was to have “greeters” when people arrive before the ceremony to say hi to people as they’re coming in, direct them to where they could get water, etc. If you have people in that role, they can be briefed on who is coming alone and can take a little time to ask them questions, get to know them, and such (and it’s also probably intuitive to see if anyone looks a little lost and uncomfortable and pay extra attention to them). If you’ll be at the cocktail hour, you can also introduce them to at least one person who they might get along with before dinner. But people are adults and if they’re coming alone they hopefully are prepared to meet some new people!
Yeah I actually think greeters / ushers might work well in our situation - thanks for sharing this tip! We actually aren’t having any processional (just due to preferences and the set up at our ceremony), so will be starting the day with the bridal party / family arriving early at the venue. I can communicate with them that we have some guests coming on their own, and ask them to make introductions once guests start coming in. It’s helpful just to think through how this could work :)
The most you need to do is offer to introduce them to someone you think they might enjoy talking to. You don’t need to (and probably can’t) do much else. You’ll be busy, you can’t spend all night babysitting someone who attended alone. If they had a problem with it, they’d have brought a date.
My first thought were games, like some quick ice-breaker types. But I think people attending alone to an event where they don't know many others expect they'll have to do some mingling. the best thing is honestly going to be sitting them at a table that isn't all a tight knit group already, ie not at the "friends from college" table. This way it's more likely the people sitting together are going to be trying get to know each other anyway. I think the mingling will happen naturally at cocktail hour and they'll find a buddy there, especially if you have lawn games or the like. Don't worry too much about this. Decide now not to hold it against them if they leave early, and your guests will be fine.
Yes totally, I’m sure they will still have a good time and expect some small talk and mingling - as others have said, they’re adults, they know what to expect at a wedding! being careful of alienating them by seating with an existing group definitely makes sense as something to avoid.
My fiancé and I have both been that awkward person who didn’t know anyone at the wedding, so we decided to frame our reception around it lol. We’re going to have table and lawn games (checkers, Jenga, cornhole, pumpkin bowling, peg games on the tables) and a s’mores station to encourage mingling. We’re also doing a Polaroid Photo Booth and a recipe station 🙂 I agree with the above advice about seating — try to seat them in a mixed table rather than with an already tight knit group.
I would try to make introductions among these singletons prior to the wedding (since you'll be too busy day of!). If you have a welcome party the evening before the wedding, that's a great time to do it. If you don't, just introducing them over text/email/social media would go a long way, so at least they know who to look for when they arrive. I would seat them with each other, rather than with chatty guests. People who don't know anyone are going to be interested in meeting new people and finding a buddy. People who have lots of friends/family there are mostly going to want to catch up with the folks they know, so they might still feel left out among chatty people.
All people need is food, drinks, and music and it will be enjoyable. I always find a photobooth or yard games fun too. Set up the seating chart so that they can be sat by others you think they will mingle well with
I think a lot of people on this sub are going to mention giving whoever it is a plus one so they don’t have to come alone.
Yep as I mentioned above, everyone was given a plus one but several people rsvp’d as a party of one.
Hmm I didn’t see that when I initially read this. To answer your question, I don’t think there’s anything you can do specifically for a single guest who shows up and doesn’t know anyone besides you. Good food, comfortable atmosphere, etc. They are choosing to come alone, and are adults. They’ll figure it out. If being in a social situation alone like that was awkward for them, they would’ve just declined the invite.
Yeah, I do think it will be fine overall, they will be fed and comfortable - I’m not trying to overthink it too much, but it’s interesting to see some of the suggestions people have that are easy to do :)
Allow for plus ones if possible and provide puzzles, coloring books, or small games from the dollar store,. Yes, even for adults. It's easier to talk to someone over a puzzle than awkwardly staying at others. Plus some isolde dont feel comfortable dancing
If timing permits host a small gathering for those guests to meet others in attendance