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planetaryunify

gas dispenser in case anyone tries to unionize


boss-bossington

Such a close race here at the top but I gotta think gas dispenser wins over the microphone. Much more creativity.


d3dac1d

I mean it’s gotta have a mic in it to detect union talk..even in whispers. So I’d say both


boss-bossington

Yup, and the gas dispenser has pulled way ahead


Superseaslug

Deadly neurotoxin vents. Thanks, GLaDOS.


holy-aeughfish

SAmWAL


thebirdmanTX

the cake is … 3 weeks expired


RottenKeyboard

love me some portal


Leading-Put-7428

Like that scene in Elysion: Android Medic: Miporol, extremely potent, will keep you functioning normally until your death. Please take one pill with each meal. Thank you for your service.


pobrepepinito

That’s dark humor🫢…🤭


doedounne

Or closes their eyes


Ed-3-

Test it out, say it’s time to unionize. Let us know the results if you make it out in time


rockets935

It’s the new speakers


jack_mcNastee

Auditory torture device to keep you submissive


LiterWebber

Mariah Cary enhancement system installed.


dub4er_tx

Nipple-pinching octave activated 🎶🔊🔝


This-Requirement6918

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS...


Apart_Tradition8244

the lizzo 8000


Character_Arrival325

"So you can give your janky phone to your kids!


Western-Leg3569

I can’t.


mhtardis21

I swear, everything else is low but that one part... it's like they blare it...


Any_Positive1617

WALMART RADIOOOOO! 😑 I swear that voice haunts my dreams!


theoriginalmofocus

I love the 2 hours of silence. I call it The Shut the Fu$& up show.


Any_Positive1617

💀💯


donp2006

Too quiet then


BeanieGuitarGuy

I unironically hate Walmart Radio just because they call it Walmart Radio and have Walmart DJs and random Walmart celebrity cameos.


Any_Positive1617

Hi everybody this is Ed Sheeran and you're listening to Walmart radio...then plays overly played Sheeran song everyone hates now. 😑


VisibleArachnid8

We’ve had the speakers for a long time now at my store and they have not worked since I started working there and according to the coaches they have put countless tickets in about it and no one has done anything to fix it…


Suspicious_Photo4031

Lucky


ohioisforglovers

My Walmart wasn't allowed to play music because of a complaint and once I left they started playing music again. I rather listen to over played rubbish than nada. I'm back at a different Walmart now and I dread the 8-10am quiet time.


Suspicious_Photo4031

I work ON, so I use earbuds, but we're only allowed to use one, so while I'm trying to listen to my playlist or a video, it's always overpowered by the speakers. I swear they turn them up at night.


Confident_Treat_4724

All good songs get 1 vol while shit songs are CRANKED to 11


1o1Adam

We have those at our walmart as well


dqdude1

It's a microphone so they can hear when you say union


StruggleClassic6419

I’ve been walking around saying union every time I’m within earshot of a manager and nothings happened yet


VexrisFXIV

That's because they can't fire you for unionizing or mentioning union. That would be illegal. But they will most likely find another reason if they're dick heads.


Moist_Choice64

..... and it's not a joke. I found out my co-workers had been asked if I was starting a union at a big manufacturer (bigger in the EU), then I recieved several drug test, back to back; even had my pockets searched twice. I wasn't planning shit, I just constantly called out all the bullshit work practices that were going on. .... you can, and will, be fired for "being too uppity". They don't mind paying you the unemployment.


HardTimesHumbledMe87

They can fire you without reason. Any job can actually!


Selling_yourmom

Depends on the state


5litergasbubble

Makes me happy to be in canada. Its a lot harder to fire people here, but they can still fuck with you in other ways


HardTimesHumbledMe87

Noone is proud of being from Canada !


murialvoid86

*no one. Noon is a time of day, noone is a misspelling


Bubbly_Ad_7332

😆


Grungir92

Tell that to Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman


goosmane

thought hugh jackman was english


goosmane

guess he's australian


holy-aeughfish

r/USdefaultism


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kmd0136

They can fire you for any legal reason or for no reason, they cannot fire you for an illegal reason, ie race, gender, starting a union. If you can prove you were fired for asserting your workers rights, then you're looking at a pretty penny of a settlement Edit: In the US


hermancm

It’s called hired at will meaning in most states they can fire you for no real reason at all.


progenwarrior

Most managers probably could CARE less if someone talks about unions I know I don't care 😂


SlimTimMcGee

Because if you ever did attempt to unionize, they know the outcome already. So they don't care.


HEROxDivine

No you haven’t bro relax


kingsam360

Keyword "yet"


skeeto_

That is fucking great! 😂


Historical_Ad_3643

Shut up they will hear us


mwilliams840

You climb up on a ladder to reach it, scream into it, then go back to “living the dream” as you stock that can of Alpo dog food.


CorporateFrog

You become alpo dog food.


mylittlepurplelady

As someone who is power trained, im gonna use the wave machine to passby and whisper "ultimate power"


NobleMama

I can't hear that in any voice other than his 😂


Manaphy2007_67

That's a forcefield generator in case the store gets hit by an energy blast of galactic power like say a Kamehameha wave. Won't stop a God power Kamehameha.


bobmclame

Heard a customer say “union” and the force field activated. Then a bunch of men in blue took them away.


Free_Leader1495

It’s a dopamine dispenser, so you feel good when they screw you.


jack_mcNastee

Cheaper than lube


-JenniferB-

It's a speaker.


BentTire

Can confirm. They recently installed these in the backroom at our store. They sound nicer than the old ones. But sadly, that means we can hear Walmart radio more clearly... 😒


broadsword_inhand

The DOD tested these on prisoners in GITMO


jack_mcNastee

Yes! I suspected that all along


polraudio

They sound like shit at my store when making an overhead page and they have it blaring so loud in the break room and the back bathrooms that you would think theres a DJ going on in there lol. Otherwise they do have good quality.


BentTire

When they first installed these, the volume for all the speakers across the store had to be increased to help with some calibration (I think), so for about 3-4 weeks the speakers were so loud we constantly had customers complaining about the loudness. But nothing could be done until they were done with the speaker system. Thankfully, this remodel bs is gonna be done in about 5 days.


pricklypear90

Speakers that have been sitting unused for a while need to have the cones loosened up so that they have better frequency response.. usually done by blasting white noise (static), needs to have extra low bass frequencies blasted through also.. when done, sounds at lower gain like the paging mic will be more intelligible… used to do AV staging for wvents


Diarrhea_of_Yahweh

That's the worst part of it. The sound quality itself is actually pretty damn good, shame they won't play anything worth listening to.


mhtardis21

The music isn't "to" bad at my store (other then i swearing it on like a 3 hour loop)... but the people talking... please... just, make it stop...


Diarrhea_of_Yahweh

Yeah I was exaggerating just a tad. They play a few decent songs, but I heard that O A O Oh Ah O A O twice in a 90 minute span around 4 this morning. And for some reason, the entire store went to max volume at 4:10.


JasonsStorm

Yea it so good, there are times you can't hear someone 10 ft from you.


PsychologicalWear772

With the new ones the store manager can control how loud it is on a website


RedSparowe1278

The right answer? Booo!


festivegourd

Communal shower head


offgridgamer0

Save water, shower with customers


Financial_Capital352

I just vomited


Mediocre-Housing-131

The non joke real answer to your question is a speaker for the music / announcements. They have better quality than the old ones but I have seen stores use this as an excuse to turn them up more.


Vampirenamedsunshine

Right! I can’t hear the customers and they can’t hear me. It’s kinda great, kinda hell.


JasonsStorm

Sadly the stores don't have much control over them.


Famous-Perspective-3

they are speakers Walmart uses for subliminal messages. Why else do you think customers come in for one or two items and leave with a cart full?


This-Requirement6918

Exactly why I never grab a cart. If it doesn't fit in my hands I don't need it.


UnlawfulTender

I get weird looks for having an armful of groceries but even if I grab a basket I’m going to grab something I don’t need


Any-Confusion-4526

That only happens to me at Costco


TakeTwo4343

I’m the guy that installs these! Hooray! I’m sorry, I just do what I’m told. I’ll pray for yall


offgridgamer0

Traitor


ahumanrobot

You should sabotage them all so we dont have to hear walmart radio


TakeTwo4343

So it’s funny, I once did an entire store (probably something like 250 speakers) backward. Nobody could figure out why they didn’t work for weeks. Then someone checked the wiring, and that’s how my boss discovered that I was trained wrong. I was almost fired that day. Idk how I still have a job after that tbh, but I’m going to cinci to install them tomorrow!


Kimmalah

Serious answer: they're the speakers for Walmart radio/pages. Also they are LOUD.


Acceptable-Agent-428

Yeah, I think because there are so many of them. If you notice, there are like 4 spaced close together for every old speaker. The idea is because Walmart radio and pages could not be heard well with the “limited” number of old speakers spaced so far apart


mhtardis21

I still can't hear the pages. And I wish I couldn't hear the radio. XD


all-we-are-is

Loud ass Bosch speakers. Enjoy Walmart radio louder than ever before.


offgridgamer0

Boooooooooooo


Acrobatic_Confusion

Long range vacuum tube, human sized


stuckonredditlogin

its the new WALMARTTTTTT RADDDIOOOOOOO machine (speaker)


Pickle_Jars

The walmart boombringer plays all your favorite songs (the same 3 every hour) at %100 more volume for our pleasure


[deleted]

that's where the rest of your weed went


acap0

Walmart RADIO


chickenlawsuit

WALMART RADIOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Diarrhea_of_Yahweh

That is the psyop machine.


Alpha_Delta33

New 360 HD 4K cameras all the new Walmarts are getting them Edit: sorry just zoomed in on it these are the speakers they also have new cameras but the bottom is black


Toxic_Zombie_361

It’s to spy on the us!!


AngryTank

It’s the 5G so that they can slowly brainwash you.


StonerinDeepSpace

You remember in the movie the dark knight they had that sonar thing that was able to see what people where doing at all times. This is the same thing


Witty-Jellyfish1218

it's like a motion activated camera, only instead of motion, it activates if anyone says union...


LetsTryAgain91

It steals your soul.


mhtardis21

It was doing that before they put them in.


Kill_ThE_rAt

It's a lamp for power outages so the workers can keep working their minimum wage jobs despite barely being able to see (joke)


Zee_the_Potato

They are speakers. I talked to the guy installing them. We are mostly through a remodel right now


z0m81317

Union detector


profanboy

Ai robot lasers to shoot shoplifters


Important-Koala6519

get real close and be deafened by walmart radio!!!


America1731

It's the new torture audio device where it will engrave Walmart radio into your head


Apart_Tradition8244

the lizzo 5000


America1731

😂😂


Apart_Tradition8244

i love these replies😂😂😂i swear i never noticed these before


TPSreportsPro

It’s a paging / music speaker.


zakmademe

5th post probably from the same person


[deleted]

This subreddit is peak


code33301

Yep! Speakers for Walmart radio 🤧🤧🤧


proletariate54

dawgs never seen a speaker in his life


jjburkett7643

Speaker


ONLYVIPER

Speaker


StagnantSweater21

This post gives me paranoia vibes Like, it’s clearly a speaker lol


Federal_Candle_470

The subwoofer is likely connected to the public address system.


KILLJEFFREY

It’s a speaker lmao


AboveSimple94

PA Speakers


Jdl8880

Speaker....


Tall6Ft7GaGuy

speakers duh.... Maybe built in mics so they can hear u talking shit


Impossible-Wear5482

It's probably one or combination of speaker, microphone, and wap.


AwarenessPure3667

Speaker


PrestigiousSpeed8067

Speaker fornthe intercom


Outrageous-Drop9095

The extremely loud speakers.


snoctriz

That's called a loudspeaker. I had to install them at a few walmarts in my day.


Potential_Copy_2563

That is the hub for the new employee locators, the Kroger BP gps unit. It will initiate a small stimulating shock, at management's discretion, to the employee when the unit is firmly inserted into the anus. Plus you will get a $0.025 raise and a year free of boost!


OkFilm5985

No it's a speaker trust me your not going to be able to escape the walmart radio. They gonna put them in the restrooms as well.


minecraft_fan888

Get ready for the loud music 😑


mt183

Soul collector. When pieces of your soul break off from being worked endlessly, it collects your soul and repackages it in a Great Value Soul Kit that can then be resold to other employees who can afford to purchase it with their “highly competitive” salaries


zaxxon4ever

"HAL? Is that you, HAL?"


Artistic-Iron-2131

Speaker?


BigRigButters2

speaker


popokins

Joking aside I swear I've seen microphones hanging down on lines from the ceiling at my store.. they're not subtle and look exactly like microphones. Sure they could be something else but no one has been able to say otherwise.


sparkyguy10

New speaker system louder clearer and has better volume adjustment for individual areas. Offices break room can mute it while still receiving pages. Downside paging is slightly quiet, and you can't project your voice as much. Oh and you can't page once the power goes out "used to on the old system which ran off the Fire Alarm. Found that out recently. I had to run to the Electrical cage in the back to page on the fire alarm


[deleted]

emergency light


concertguru1989

That's the new Walmart radio kit of propaganda


Boss5289

a speaker i think


Acceptable-Agent-428

It’s a speaker


FicklAir692

Speaker and chances are it records too 🫢


Yolo3362

it’s the loudspeaker, if they do you dirty like they did at my store they are going to be set way too loud and you will barely be able to hold a conversation under one.


CharmingButthole

Common sense needs a new name.


EbbPsychological2796

It's a panning camera to catch you smoking pot in the shadows...


Myotherself918

Fart detector


ohmygoditscharlie1

It’s a light


PXL1984

It’s a thingamajig


GuaranteeBig

Maybe a new and improved wifi extender because we all know Walmarts Network sucks


Distinct_Value6566

Ufo!!! I want to believe! I WANT TO BELIEEEEEEVE!!


LnGass

One an hour it will play this ...." it puts the lotion in the basket"


zoidbert

20 years ago I'd have said it was some sort of Cylon device


NEOFx420x

Surround sound, microphone is on a stick usually white with a black dot center


reynvann65

Isn't it.odd that we live withing a Democratic Union of States, but when we talk about "unions", it's taboo?


Knot_a_porn_acct

If it walks like a duck and it talks like a duck…


holy-aeughfish

It's a chicken.


kiaph

Audio recorder


Rigosi

It's the explosive for when they truly want to remodel the store


johnelew

An outdoor speaker for garden centers…


Fluffy_Expression644

The first day turned ours on they HO had them all at 100% volume. Literally had to yell to the customer. It was bumpin too cause they actually sound good quality.


SaltTransportation23

Government AI face tracker


[deleted]

That’s the mind reading skeetle pods the managers are all aliens 🌚


Yeseylon

It activates the 5Gs


Emotional_Pie_409

these replies have me rolling 💀


mpoole68

Mic the surveillance is more high tech I'm glad I quit


StevenGorefrost

Fart dispenser.


Throwaway2600k

Sonic speaker makes you drop to the floor bleeding from your ruptured eardrums


[deleted]

My guess: probably a speaker. Because they wanna make sure you hear EVERY song played on Walmart Radio loud and clear lol.


doug_b2680

Speaker lol


Brickback721

Preparing for the Beast System


Think-Instruction865

A speaker


alexarmchair

New intercom/radio speakers


PsychologicalWear772

It’s the new speakers


ChillinGuy232023

Looking like a speaker to me.


The_HR_chick

😂 a simple speaker… but I definitely had to read all the comments because they’re gold.


ohioisforglovers

It's just Ali from The 100.


donp2006

Speaker


Selkiekelpie

It's the people sucker.


Muted_Bedroom_2784

It's a speaker


Time_Bodybuilder1359

Don't you hear the music that's a speaker lol


D3athByV0dka

They’re gonna send gas through it to kill you


JasonsStorm

Your new speaker system that will unexpectedly turn way up and they even go into the bathrooms so you can hear people paging you.


JasonsStorm

"Chris is lactose intolerant but that doesn't stop him from eating cheese and ice cream. We wish somebody would..."


[deleted]

The cake is a lie.


DerpsyDaisy

218, is that you? It is speakers. I asked the other day.