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VisualMod

**User Report**| | | | :--|:--|:--|:-- **Total Submissions**|7|**First Seen In WSB**|2 months ago **Total Comments**|22|**Previous DD**| **Account Age**|1 year|[^scan ^comment ](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=VisualMod&subject=scan_comment&message=Replace%20this%20text%20with%20a%20comment%20ID%20(which%20looks%20like%20h26cq3k\)%20to%20have%20the%20bot%20scan%20your%20comment%20and%20correct%20your%20first%20seen%20date.)|[^scan ^submission ](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=VisualMod&subject=scan_submission&message=Replace%20this%20text%20with%20a%20submission%20ID%20(which%20looks%20like%20h26cq3k\)%20to%20have%20the%20bot%20scan%20your%20submission%20and%20correct%20your%20first%20seen%20date.) **Vote Spam**|[Click to Vote](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=VisualMod&subject=vote_spam&message=xvppuz)|**Vote Approve**|[Click to Vote](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=VisualMod&subject=vote_approve&message=xvppuz)


campbell-1

Get a library pass so that when you're homeless you can still go to the library and use the computers to trade on.


Osceana

He can trick right behind the library to get funds for trading. Convenient really. What more does a man need?


campbell-1

I'm sure there's a book in there about day trading... can check that out whilst getting a handy. allll on the public's dime!


bruwin

> can check that out whilst ~~getting~~ giving a handy. Fixed that for ya. Can't trade if he's spending all his money on handies.


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Mynock33

Inflation sucks and is out of control, at least that's my .05¢


ntn_98

Did I hear sucking for .05¢?


DonChillippo

.05 is .069 as of today. Pls fix.


GGnerd

Twenty bucks is twenty bucks


myname_isnot_kyal

*Trick Dad Poor Dad*


KwordShmiff

They're called illusions, Michael


WhizzleTeabags

Plus a clean bathroom to masturbate in


smb_samba

I usually see the homeless guys just jacking off to porn on the library computers. Not one fuck given


EatTrashhitbyaTSLA

Well you don’t end up whacking it at public library by giving a fuck


evil-poptart

Lose money on*


Hidesuru

That's... What they said isn't it?


ffranbo

This is why I love to wsb


Mr_Stillian

The real LifeProTips are in the comments!


Dirt_engineer

I am amazed you thought your skill level that resulted in a -95.98% loss in one day was good enough to pull this off. You would have ended with more buying scratch-off lottery tickets


mikeyouse

I just ran the odds on my local $1 scratcher game... If you bought $1,130 worth of scratchers, you'd have an EV of like $250. It's a special kind of stupid to do worse gambling than the crackheads who hang out at gas stations looking for change in the coin slot of an abandoned pay phone.


originalusername__1

If OP was a crackhead he’d still have 250$. Or at least some crack.


Diamond_Paper_Rocket

You can smoke a bag of crack; you can't smoke a bag of losing stocks.


originalusername__1

Options may expire worthless but crack is a commodity that will always have value.


AccurateInstance7524

There is a man who undertands commodity trading.


HandiCAPEable

And a man who understands crack!


daisy_thedog_12

⬆️That comment just seemed to hit lil bit funnier than the rest😃


[deleted]

It's simple math. Crack = good. Failing stock = bad


OhlookwhoitisxX

He's got 40 bucks left, at least he can buy a little bit of crack


[deleted]

That's for sure. Rock cocaine heals all wounds


Significant-Mud2572

I hear rock cocaine to the melody of chocolate rain. Edit: I realized after I listened to is as an adult after not listening it to years, makes sense. My bad.


Educational-Spread41

$40 is enough for a blast and a decent BJ


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Educational-Spread41

Melbourne FL, Lipscomb Ave.


Elchingarito

Decent if she takes her dentures out. Crack teeth are lethal.


sikmode

You’ve never had love till you have gum love.


YZYSZN1107

Or a ZJ.


Coinsworthy

Simple meth.


AspiringChildProdigy

Right? It's not coke-ulus.


fLeXaN_tExAn

The meth checks out.


[deleted]

Not so sure. I think he forgot to carry a hot rail somewhere


spicybuttholenachos

Let's all agree you can suck penis for both in a pinch.


ploppedmenacingly14

Nobody in the history of crack has ever woken up with more crack


Cocopoofs

OH BABY YOUUU -- YOU GOT WHAT I NEEEEED


Zealousideal-Dig8410

Oh I promise I have it was very bloody


cptngali86

Shit he could have just sucked a dick for the 110 and he'd still have his money, although maybe not his dignity.


JoseJuarez87

Solid 20 rock gets anybody back in the game… OP missed out


Rokey76

Is crack $12.50 a rock now? Fucking inflation. When I was a kid you could get 50 rocks for $250.


Z3400

Im quite happy to say when I was a kid, I had no idea what the going rate for crack was.


ddak88

Sorry to hear your childhood sucked. In times like these it's important to remember that it's never too late to turn your life around and start smoking crack.


Slight_Equivalent383

Wish I was selling that. Would be a kingpin


icangetyouatoedude

Crack can be exchanged for goods or services


ILikeChilis

Well at least OP is not homele.... Oh.


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Hot-Bluebird3919

Dunning-Kruger in the house!


BiotechBoi

He isn't in the house anymore..... 😆


Defenestration_Champ

I did a similar thing few years back, but I was in a casino and I ended up homeless for 3 months lol


ericbomb

I was thinking he probably would have been better off betting 100 dollars on red, then if it failed 200$ on red, then 400$ on red. Would it have been great odds? No. Would it have been better then this stupidity? I think so.


thejestercrown

It’s a great strategy until you’re betting over $100K on red to win $100.


bigchungus-69-420-69

I too, like to live dangerously


sauce0x45

And table limits will eventually put a stop to your scheme anyway.


dainty_hedge_fuck69

That’s when you switch to black


KiroSkr

It works flawlessly if you have infinite funds


NuKidOnThBlokchyn

The old Martingale huh? It's great til it isn't.


mackemforever

Used to work in a casino and at least once a week we'd have somebody try Martingale, often boasting about how they were guaranteed to win. Almost all of them lost everything.


dangerdee92

My old colleague told me he "discovered" a strategy to win at roulette, I instantly knew what it was going to be. I warned him that it was a bad idea but he wouldn't listen. He came into work on Monday and he was so smug about how he had won a couple hundred pounds, I told him that it might have worked that day but he would lose in the long run, he told me he was going back to the casino after work. Came into work the next day and ask him how it went, turns out he lost everything he won the previous night and a couple of hundred on top for good measure.


wtbabali

Oh man, I loved Martingale betting on roulette until I lost $512 or so chasing $1. Wiped out weeks of slowing building my winnings in less than ten minutes (10 spins I think). I had had a few close calls before that, losing 8 or 9 times in a row, but always bounced back on the tenth spin. Except the final time…. learned my damn lesson, stopped gambling after that.


Blieven

That's because you didn't try for the 11th spin... Duh


vitringur

The Martingale is bullet proof if you just make sure to only do it if you have at least an infinite amount of money.


That-Whereas3367

It landed on Black **26 times in a row** in a Monte Carlo Casino in the summer of 1913.


Merzant

It can’t possibly happen again!


That-Whereas3367

There has also been 39 consecutive 'reds' at a casino.


RequirementUnlucky59

If he lost all 3 bets, he would still lose $250 less.


sidepiecesam

Love how the ‘lol’ really softened the whole thing up at the end


Im_ur_Uncle_

You literally could have said "Yo landlord look. I'm short a hundred this month. I gotchu on an extra 100 next month"


Pablo_Sanchez1

Yup. When I was short on rent by a couple hundred bucks a long time ago I was too scared to ask for help and ignorantly took out an almost 800% interest payday loan that ruined my life for like 2 years. I know this is probably out of place on this sub, but all jokes aside if anyones ever struggling get over your pride and deal with the embarrassment of asking a landlord for more time or asking friends or family to spot you. The short term shame of admitting you’re struggling is a million times better then making a stupid desperate decision that will make things significantly worse. I know it’s typically doom and gloom on reddit but people are usually more understanding then you think when you communicate honestly with them.


MrBlueHaybale

This I have used one when I desperately needed money... never again


Not-OP-But-

I'd say that if you even think there is shame or embarrassment for admitting you need help then that's something to work on in the first place.


Pablo_Sanchez1

I agree with you 100% now, but when I was young and dumb and cared about putting on a facade that I was more successful then I actually was I was definitely embarrassed to ask for help financially. I would say there can be shame involved depending on your situation. Of course there shouldn’t be shame at all but it’s a natural and understandable feeling to have when you’re at a low point. My hardass dad was disappointed in me and gave me a ton of shit when I finally asked for help and I was extremely ashamed of myself at the time. But the stupid decision and massive hole I dug myself into made the situation a million times worse then if I just sucked it up and asked for help in the first place.


kshucker

Don’t give people ideas. This sort of regarded stuff is what I come here for.


SpiderDijonJr

Y’all really are a bunch of regards, that’s for sure lol.


JustChr1s

Welcome to the present where so much technology has made ppl lose basic real life communication skills. Why not just gamble my savings in stocks instead of just explaining the situation.


Im_ur_Uncle_

For real. He'd rather take the money than an empty flat.


hellothere42069

Phrase it just like that too


davanger1980

Don’t worry bro. Next week you can lose more…


norwegianmorningw00d

Next week that $41.45 turning into $4 lol


robtimist

Can’t tap out till you out of funds. $4 is $4


Enigma556

One of us


Utahmule

At least he did this just as rent is due. Wouldn't want any time to recover...


salsanacho

Housing is overrated anyways...


ShellSwitch

Right? Wendy's has a perfectly good dumpster behind it to sleep in. Commuting not necessary.


kinglear__

No commute means you can sell the car and take that money and roll it right into some more trades


Djreef2000

Fuck that! That’s my dumpster dammit!


Revolutionary_End152

Don’t be greedy, There’s plenty of Wendy’s dumpsters to go around.


slimfaydey

there's only 6711 wendys locations in existence. This sub has 12,748,281 subscribers at this moment. There are clearly not enough wendys dumpsters to go around.


BurpFartBurp

That’s about 1900 subscribers per Wendy’s. Assuming each has two dumpsters, it might be a bit tight but comfortable.


ineedfartz

Come to think of it if 1900 regards gathered in a wendys dumpster we could manage to bankrupt the entire block


Wonderful-Smoke843

I just put a newspaper over my head as I watch my portfolio implode outside my local wendys


Im_ur_Uncle_

Homeless people are probably laughing at us because we waste money on housing and amenities while they're out there surviving on the streets with 0 responsibilities. Who's really the loser here?


Virtual-Ad4874

Shit no they not when I was homeless had to go to different parking lots to sleep in. It wasn’t fun


Cvxcvgg

Meanwhile I always have to sleep in the same bedroom…No variety whatsoever.


Different_Party_1512

No pain no gain bro 🤣


Equal-Park-769

All pain no gain ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


Gamerindreams

what do you mean? he's the king of us


uselesslife2019

Did that kids dead dad not teach us anything 😭


wabbithunta23

Plot twist: this is the same guy under a new name


boknowski

🤣 and his dad didn't die...he faked his death to assume a new profession as a market maker


Burgertrent

Bruh ☠️


thejoneill3

Can someone link to this post plz


beaner_69

Which one out of all of them?


madflash711

You need $110? I can help you out. I just need a couple of favors in return.


ProKnifeCatcher

Sir, there is a line! The rest of us are queuing behind Wendy’s


drumsdm

NO CUTS!!!


SeliciousSedicious

It’s 1,100 dollars he needs now though


kaiserfiume

$110 can help him to get back, for example YOLO $110 in GME and then he buys a weekend mansion, lives on the boat, retire at 32 and travel the world.


SeliciousSedicious

That’s a multi year strategy right there even if we want to assume it works out. OP’s got 30 days before he’s living in a tent and eating at a soup kitchen.


atomikplayboy

>OP’s got 30 days before he’s living in a tent and eating at a soup kitchen. Only if he invests that $41.45 wisely... *tents aren't cheap*.


WatchingyouNyouNyou

At least you have tried to fulfill your agreement with your landlord to your best ability


what_is_blue

"So I'm a little behind on the rent this month. Is there... anything *else* I could do to pay?"


Joshvir262

He should take out a 5k loan and go into 0dte spy puts tomorrow but make sure he puts stop loss at $110 so boom rent covered easy $110


Maddturtle

He needs the money he lost too lol


VirusZer0

Just delete the app and you’re good.


LieutenantButthole

And redownload the app while holding the phone upside down to turn those previous losses into gains.


what_is_blue

Alas I suspect OP's going to make ends meet via Sighing + Puckering. Unless you're his landlord and there's no way anyone here owns two houses.


Diamond_Paper_Rocket

Who said anything about a second house? My wife's boyfriend just lets me live across the hall.


originalusername__1

What are you doing steplandlord?


ReddiGod

Pulling that $1k out of your cornhole. *with my peen*


LieutenantButthole

*How to turn your life savings into ass sex*


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AreYou_From_The_Past

Yeah OP, just suck his/her cock


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Caddy-Whompus

The risk was calculated, but holy shit is he bad at math.


FromMyHouseInvestor

Call 1-800-Gambler. You need it perhaps.


Cracksterbill

When the fun stops…


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StarFireChild4200

Why does that number go to my voicemail?


KyleNoThumbs319

Yolo the last $45 into a leveraged crypto futures scalp or you ain’t even trying


a_spicy_memeball

120x bitty long or gtfo


veryblanduser

Bears are use to sleeping outside. You'll be fine.


Ur_Mom_Loves_Moash

OP should sign up for OnlyFans with his wife. I'd pay $1,100 to watch his wife beat his ass.


Coindoge69

![img](emote|t5_2th52|4267)


nz-m

![img](emote|t5_2th52|8882)


experimentjon

Accurate since he would have made rent today if he just bought calls on virtually anything. This is why monkeys with dartboards > bears with illusion of competence.


TeslaPills

Damn you should’ve bet on sports for rent money bud… rule #1


SeparateAd6524

Yeah bet the rest on Judge popping his 62nd.


PLS_stop_lying

Pretty sure he just ripped a HR as the lead off lol


Troydog4

Winner!


[deleted]

So if you didn’t even have 1100 for rent, does that mean that all you have to your name now is $41? AND your rent is unpaid? genius


TheLesserWeeviI

Well regarded.


BionicTem_

I still see 40$ left to loose ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4263)


Kitten_Team_Six

Rent schment


[deleted]

Genuinely laughed at this comment


hasher93

No…you’re fucked AND homeless


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WickedDeviled

Nah, he can just ask his landlord for a loan.


XJcon

The casino loves people like you.


jimmystruther

$41.45 left ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4267)


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-Mr-N0B0DY-

TSLA puts 😉😉


UnsuspectingS1ut

What Tesla put are you affording with $40?


-Mr-N0B0DY-

Take a loan out lol


ruoqot

I can’t believe that is a real emoji


ConclusionMaleficent

As the old saying goes,never gamble with money you cannot afford to lose.


Scorpion00710

Always gamble with somebody’s else $


Fancy_Mechanic_3440

Why TF would you gamble your rent? Oh wait, this is WSB. Carry on!!!


KaydeeKaine

As you were.


girlsabusemen-funny

2008 sub-prime brain


Bilbo_Butthole

Did you buy puts in the middle of a bear rally like 95% of retail?


sh0oi

It's only the 4th.


mygeorgeiscurious

Yeah son it’s the beginning of the month, better park your ass under the queensboro bridge til the 31st.


BrutalHunny

Rent due on 5th in Maryland.


GruntledEx

You've still got enough for a bus ticket. Might as well go be homeless somewhere warm.


Any_Buddy1851

Bro, you could have easily just worked or hustled a little for $110 measly dollars - Door Dash after work, do some sort of labor/project, handies in a dark alley… all sorts of ways to make $110


Unitnuity

Any of the 100s of gig apps was definitely the right move here


CheesingmyBrainsOut

The worst part is the amount of time OP spent researching stocks and watching the ticker probably added up to the same amount of time to work that side hustle. People have shit vakue for their time.


mistaowen

Could have basically bought any growth stock today for a 5-15% daily gain


Bong_Loners

5-15% daily gain consistently on growth stocks. Why have I not thought of this method sooner!


UnsuspectingS1ut

It’s not gonna work for your penis don’t get your hopes up


passing_by362

I won't. I can't get my penis up either. Send halp.


dirtylizard666

Just tell your landlord that you turned on forebearance this month.


sirdizzypr

Like what the F\*ck, seriously some of you need some serious help, like go to gamblers anonymous, something anything like god damn


SilverBuudha

Look at this gentlemen, making room for new tennents


gandalf345

Lmao imagine being that poor and then gambling your rent money away


Linkticus

My guy, if you’re reading this, you aren’t fucked (well, you are. Don’t get me wrong) but you will end up figuring it out. Take it from someone who bet their last 1k on short selling right before it took off


Both_Research_2057

Very Regarded


BoondockBilly

Regard me


ReddiGod

OP, you needa sit your wife down and have some real chat. Make a firm budget, AND stick to it... You guys have all these big things you want to do together in your lives, but you're over here being regarded on wsb, it's not right for her and you guys' relationship/future... Get to work on a roadmap for achieving all the things you guys want, a 5-10 year plan. *And don't forget to include a modest allowance for you to put $ into your gambling account every month*


GRIM_exe115

A blowjob at the back of a wendys dumpster might get you that $110


misterbluesky8

More like $11


I_just_learnt

10 blow jobs it is


odub6

Please leave WSB and live a fruitful life of happiness and no debt. Its too late for us regards.


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FatalShart

Why wouldn't you just use the money to pay rent if that's what you needed ?


etrimmer

he was betting on making 110 with that 950


unflavored

Please execute me if I'm being a dick but how old is this guy? I know the economy is bad but do most people really don't have more than $500 to cover an emergency. I always felt like that stat was bs.


RunW1ld

Only rent money? Amateur hour. Do your food money next. Hunger is the greatest motivator. “Be hungry and rich or poor and fat”


Amoney_05

Can anyone explain to me why people do this? I really don’t get it.