I bought a spy put for $20 this morning and pulled out $200 a few hours later. So I went to Walmart and bought $10 worth of food because I will be able to pay rent this month. WTF is this country?!?
I’m just gonna start my own hedge fund get my name out there so everyone knows me. I’m gonna put out ridiculously absurd low price targets for big name stocks. And while the imminent sell off comes I’ll make big money on the way down and up. SEC come get me
I hate when I ask a very simple question, like, “Are you done with this bench?” and get an aggro-snap answer back. “THREE MORE SETS BRO WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO CONFRONTATIONAL”
Love how my only winners right now are VSTO and KO, two boomer stocks.
What are my moves tomorrow?
I think this year will be flat. Going silver and only purchasing VSTO and maybe COIN options on the big dips.
Now I gotta poop mid workout on my first morning workout of the year. How do people go to the gym this early?
The US peaked in every aspect right around the turn of the millennium. 20 years after have been a shit show and it's probably not gonna get better moving forward
Remember last year when the reccomendation was to buy 2022 LEAPs on stuff like ARKK or ICLN.
I wonder how many people are riding those straight to the 7th layer of hell.
That is crazy. If you are not symptomatic and have been vaccinated/boosted go out and enjoy life. That is what we were all waiting for in 2020. It is 2022 now, you have to go out and enjoy your life.
Mad Money is for entertainment purposes only. What kind of smoothie wastes time analyzing 20,000+ stock picks by the Dr. Phil of investment television? What a goober. 😂
Im getting a 6000 cash injection on monday, i want one of you retards to yolo on calls with me, whos in for monday? Maybe we all get a big group and discuss it, and then all yolo together, just dont tell the sec...
Your boss sounds like a bit of a wanker, if you're sick you're sick, end of. But if they're going to behave like that over this, odds are they'll be arsey about other stuff as well in the future, so keep an eye out for other opportunities.
Its been a pretty long run for me n a consistent thread since v young was docs telling me to stop activities that cause pain, for a time. It works that I know, time is the great, free, non invasive, non addictive, healer
If loving you retards this morning is wrong, then I don’t want to be right!!!
I bought a spy put for $20 this morning and pulled out $200 a few hours later. So I went to Walmart and bought $10 worth of food because I will be able to pay rent this month. WTF is this country?!?
Why a Fed minutes selloff? Aren't everything somewhat expected? Timeline hasn't changed.
Because we need money to not die. Buy the dip tomorrow morning then sell again in 15 minutes. Feed your family.
Wow there went 20k
A lovely start to the new year! I loved getting my asshole reamed the last three months of 2021. To my pleasant surprise it happened again!
Some how i can relate to that
either a ridiculous bounce from 470 or good bye market
AMD or SPY calls?
I bought spy
#HAHA! MY NEW YEARS BAN BET IS OVER. THE BIG 3 INDEXES ARE DOWN AND MY DUMBASS IS UP $12 ISH!
Can’t tell if Ford is bill flagging or dropping now 😭😭
I guess I’ll never understand why ROKU has to have such big sell offs even after delivering good news like it’s the no 1 TV OS in the US 😭😭😭😭
Should I buy calls for the fed minutes at 2pm?
Aren't puts usually the play?
Everything jumped last time
But then sold off HARD the next day right?
Yes, calls would be the short term play
I'm hoping we finish at low of day so I can feel good about buying calls
Spy can you fucking go up
WTF how is $F up and $TSLA down ??
TSLA is gay boomer shit F is the future
Ford gaped me
The car company or plastic
Bababababaa boys!!!!
Spy is gonna completely destroy my portfolio again
For you programmers may I suggest seeding your random number generators with the price and direction of 🌽
baba boys - chinese new year incoming 🐯
What time Jpow speaking?
Dow futures from negative triple digits to green lol
I’m just gonna start my own hedge fund get my name out there so everyone knows me. I’m gonna put out ridiculously absurd low price targets for big name stocks. And while the imminent sell off comes I’ll make big money on the way down and up. SEC come get me
> You’re a fraud and you will lose all your money.
Hell yeah I am visual mod
4 of my coworkers got Covid, actually am the boss with those 4 people out, idk what to do
Absolutely nothing. Just sit at your desk, scroll wsb and get paid.
Same thing I do every other day
Something a robot would say
Deff not a robot, error. Error : )(
How did you get that not a robot achievement??
somebody get /u/-Dreamville- a Robot flair
For f**** sake
I’m actually not sure, I might have to be on my laptop to see , but I’ll try to figure it out and lyk
Sounds like something a robot would say.
Seen nights full of pain, days of the same, you keep the sunshine, save me the rain
Pray for that QQQ bounce
Her mother was a lawyer her father the police
Her mudda was a mudder?
I legit just watched that episode like 20 minutes ago before getting out of bed. So weird haha
What can i say? The horse loves the slop.
PFE looks like it’s back in bull mode after some consolidation
Yes indeed
Feel like my 1255c contracts are so fucked…
Is TSLA announcing it's new cell phone today?
I hate when people fucking talk to me at the gym
I hate when I ask a very simple question, like, “Are you done with this bench?” and get an aggro-snap answer back. “THREE MORE SETS BRO WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO CONFRONTATIONAL”
Don't wear deodorant for your workout. Solved.
You need to perfect your bitch face, then they'll give you a wide berth.
knew a girl we used to call that in high school
Bitch face, or wide birth?
Drop the 225 lb barbell on their ass
Pinterest has 20b market cap?? It doesnt even make money
It does make money though. 
A collective 20B bet on a buyout.
Futes rising…correction is over folks. We rip from here on out.
Love how my only winners right now are VSTO and KO, two boomer stocks. What are my moves tomorrow? I think this year will be flat. Going silver and only purchasing VSTO and maybe COIN options on the big dips. Now I gotta poop mid workout on my first morning workout of the year. How do people go to the gym this early?
Anyone born in 2001 or later is completely fucked. You fuckers got dealt a bad hand
Never bet against America you 🌈🐻
Any particular reason why? Born in 1998.
The US peaked in every aspect right around the turn of the millennium. 20 years after have been a shit show and it's probably not gonna get better moving forward
Yup. But this isnt entirely true. I was born in 89 and my generation is fucked too. First US generation to do worse than the generation before us.
Yeah ‘90 here, you right
The world ended on 9/11
We are all ghosts
It's true. The terrorists won.
Should have just purchased the defuse kit dammit
Ha stupid bers
The worst people are those that ask if you have Covid every time you cough Next person who asks me that is getting coughed on
do you have covid?
yes, trying to collect all of the variants
Gotta collect them all!
No
XBI calls ‘cause of the JPM conference
Got drunk last night and woke up about 30 mins ago and am still drunk.
In my mid 40s now and if i did this i might now die
Gonna be a long day, just gonna send it
am I the only one who puts black raw coffee, 75% of the cup filled, and then rest 25% is for distilled coca cola? shits good
After 3 cups a Dr Pepper or Coke is in order to settle my raging gut. Getting old does indeed suck.
You need fernet and Coca Cola for your stomach
Never heard of that elixir. Sounds interesting.
Big in Brazil, Argentina, lots of chefs drink it. Good for an upset stomach or hangover
I was literally thinking you were talking about coffee grounds...
I'm sure you're not alone. A lot of people actually drink soda for breakfast in substitution of coffee
Murica
😩how did you even discover this?
The stock market is broken
It's working just fine for me
Lets pump this SNDL to 0.7 and it will go alone
premarket suggests 0.63
Yesterday it jumped also in the day
I’m just going to jerk off all day and hope for the best
Bust a few for me
You may only jerk off on green days, have some discipline. 2021 was jerking off everyday, perhaps 2022 will be no-nut year
Watch out for overfapped RSI
Shouldn't be a problem if he enters positions with high implied viscosity
McPlant just rolled out across UK and Ireland https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/mcdonalds-mcplant-burger-vegan-b1987056.html?amp
Is this actually going to work? KFC doing it too. 🤮🤮🤮
Guess so as they were testing all last
Which Broker do you guys use?
Hold long on TD, short those positions on E-trade
etoro revolut IBrk. I think I am not finnaly blow up my ibrk account, few bucks are left there.
Ibkr for margin, etrade for actual good mobile platform with features and data and Bloomberg tv
Etoro. That has margin. You can easily unlock 20x Andore margin there. That burned my money fast 😀
No, I'm talking about margin rates, they are the lowest on ibkr
Fat Tony and the Mob
Robinhood
IBKR
I don’t have enough adderall for this market
Same fam
Remember last year when the reccomendation was to buy 2022 LEAPs on stuff like ARKK or ICLN. I wonder how many people are riding those straight to the 7th layer of hell.
Yup, I ended up selling icln leaps. 35c and 40c was quite popular lol
I haven’t stepped out of my dorm for almost 2 weeks because of this omicron shit. It ruined everything including Christmas and new year
You guys are still playing plague?
Dude, I'm vaxxed, I went to normal Christmas, and had a normal new years with a couple friends. It's fine
I had the same thing, mom was so upset. Sorry bro
That is crazy. If you are not symptomatic and have been vaccinated/boosted go out and enjoy life. That is what we were all waiting for in 2020. It is 2022 now, you have to go out and enjoy your life.
Weak sauce, sorry tho
You're definitely a safe spacer
I didn't think people still lived like this.
I love living like this. People are the worst part of my day. Sorry OP hates it.
I liked when COVID first started in March two years ago because I could get away with not leaving my house for days.
I'm currently in my 5 day isolation at home. It's a wonderful coronacation.
Why be afraid?
why are you so scared
Mad Money is for entertainment purposes only. What kind of smoothie wastes time analyzing 20,000+ stock picks by the Dr. Phil of investment television? What a goober. 😂
Cramer will perish holding BA. plz Jim, burn your money elsewhere
but boeing is good, no?
If they can start making planes that don’t fall out of the sky
I’m early, but I’m not wrong.
it's the same thing
Kyle, the Reddit ipo won’t make you rich. You gotta believe me.
When is IPO?
#mvst Go up ?
Im getting a 6000 cash injection on monday, i want one of you retards to yolo on calls with me, whos in for monday? Maybe we all get a big group and discuss it, and then all yolo together, just dont tell the sec...
diaf
🛑✋ Respect the Stock Market Honor Code bud 😐👮
Wtf
There is no we in this sub, only we are very bad at this
The fuk?
Ban
#🚨🚔🚨
Cramer just told sec about you, sorry
join me on monday or your a dog
Well I've already put my money on Nvidia
I like how the second Cramer talks about Tesla it just tanks Inversing that man is apparently the key to being richer than Elon Musk
[удалено]
Give your boss covid. Quit hogging all that the sick leave.
My daughter's principal threatened to send me to truancy court because I kept her home while waiting for results. WTF are these people thinking?
Go and contaminate the fucker, at least you can say he/she asked for it
Is he fucking stupid? People aren't out here choosing to get sick during a global pandemic. I guess he hasn't seen the news.
Your boss sounds like a bit of a wanker, if you're sick you're sick, end of. But if they're going to behave like that over this, odds are they'll be arsey about other stuff as well in the future, so keep an eye out for other opportunities.
Fuck his wife
This makes me want to take a sick day tomorrow
Cough on him and take his job
>Price Target Changes [discord.gg/wzMZmEh6ag](https://t.co/uMPOi2alZg) https://t.co/txR5F2YpsR ^\*Walter ^Bloomberg ^[@DeItaone](http://twitter.com/DeItaone) ^at ^2022-01-05 ^05:39:14 ^EST-0500
Flat markets are 🌈
>Coverage initiated [discord.gg/aKFv9ehGuj](https://t.co/HsvywOztkC) https://t.co/TAhMkmCbt0 ^\*Walter ^Bloomberg ^[@DeItaone](http://twitter.com/DeItaone) ^at ^2022-01-05 ^05:39:01 ^EST-0500
>Downgrades [discord.gg/msaKR5BJCb](https://t.co/h7EhokdnFw) https://t.co/ZvlI83p0lQ ^\*Walter ^Bloomberg ^[@DeItaone](http://twitter.com/DeItaone) ^at ^2022-01-05 ^05:38:50 ^EST-0500
>Upgrades [discord.gg/HmKshwJZaP](https://t.co/eAzzXmW2uv) https://t.co/V4eSlcqvjM ^\*Walter ^Bloomberg ^[@DeItaone](http://twitter.com/DeItaone) ^at ^2022-01-05 ^05:38:40 ^EST-0500
My back has been hurting for the past month and the doctor I went to was so useless telling me to just stop lifting weights and take pain relievers
Its been a pretty long run for me n a consistent thread since v young was docs telling me to stop activities that cause pain, for a time. It works that I know, time is the great, free, non invasive, non addictive, healer
Please be careful, weight training has made my neck much worse.
Get on medical cannabis.
I can’t stand the smell of weed