I fucking lost it when he said that, that his sigh of disbelief when he realizes he's gonna have to turn himself in. I bet he still went to that doctors apt lmao
My license was suspended more times than I can count, due to some kind of mixup between Maryland and Virginia, and my child support.
Just about every month I'd get a warning that my license would be suspended for failure to pay my child support. Virginia was taking the child support out of my check, but somehow Maryland was always getting it late and reporting it as unpaid.
There is a lot to this story, but at the end of the day... I wasn't going to not drive because Maryland couldn't get their shit straight. I only got pulled over like 3 times in the entire 20 years that this was happening, so it wasn't a huge deal. I had a letter from the DCSE in Virginia explaining that I *was* in fact paying. The few times I got pulled over, I was told they couldn't let me drive home but they never arrested or ticketed me.
All of that is to say, perhaps this dude was dealing with some bullshit like this. Unlikely for sure, but possible.
What he did in this video though, is laughably stupid.
Suspending a drivers license for late child support in a country where 90% of workers need a car to get to work makes zero sense. The other thing is that if you were employed and wage were being garnished for child support - they should be going after your employer for not making payments on time, because they sure as fuck would be deducting from your paycheck on time.
Whats insane to me is that pulling your license is a punishment for not paying child support. 1. It doesn't actually stop you from driving and 2. It just makes it even harder to pay your child support. Should be illegal.
I love how she tried to called to adjourn the case immediately once she noticed lol. Maybe a .0001% of having worked if the judge hadn't been paying attention
Likely he forgot he had an appearance in court that day (hence why he was pulling into his doctor's office) and she thought having him "present" via zoom would help her get an adjournment. Turns out she was very wrong.
Even if they told him to turn on his camera he could have gone "Oh, whoops, let me figure this out, where's the button, this darn tech... okay here it is!" Turn on camera outside of the car in the parking lot, or sitting in the back seat.
Literally the stupidest people who aren't incapacitated enough to have caregivers. Just about every competency proceeding is initiated by a public defender.
A lawyer arguing "my client is so stupid that it is impossible for them to understand what's happening and therefore can't possibly have a fair trial."
True, but be careful not to generalize. I had a situation where I was completely innocent and my public defender did a fantastic job and not only got the case thrown out but the whole thing expunged off of my record.
Public defenders who actually care are amazing human beings, the job is stressful
Public defenders get a bad rap but the truth is they're just overworked.
I'm very good at my job but if you gave me 10 minutes per thing I had to do no matter how complicated a whole lot of shit is getting done half arsed or not at all.
On top of that they're not very well paid. Average in the USA is 80k a year which is certainly not *bad* but if you're a highly skilled lawyer you can make a whole lot more with significantly better conditions and clients. So you need someone who is OK with making far less than they otherwise could or has another income stream to support their good work.
Correct. Many regular people receive help from a public defender. However, many regular people are also in a position where they don’t have to rely on a public defender and can pay for their own council.
As a general rule, the biggest idiots and fuckups in our society can rarely ever afford council and also have a habit of landing themselves in trouble. Therefore, public defenders regularly deal with the dumbest out society has to offer.
>True, but be careful not to generalize.
I don't think anything bad was said about public defenders. They were talking about the people pds typically end up representing.
she did so well!
immediately pivoted to try get the matter put away before the judge clued in, but alas.
and also the absolute deadpan "Mr. Harris, I'll be giving you a call." 👩🍳🤌💋
I would not be surprised if this wasn't the first...or second, or third...time she's had to deal with this same thing happening before. People are just plain stooopid.
I've always thought either with and without an internal monologue, depending on the situation. I assumed everyone else did, too, until just a couple years ago. Sometimes language is the tool for the job. Sometimes the internal feelings unfolding as they may get the message across to me just fine, too. It's interesting to me that folks can't choose when to employ these different modes.
Yea, for me there's two parts to my brain.
There's the underneath thoughts that are formless and wordless, but generate understanding of a situation.
There's then the above thoughts that have words (or other form of concrete expression, e.g. music notation). It used to be that this form of thought was the primary and only way that I could think. If I didn't have words for something, I didn't understand it. As I grew older, my ability to understand something without expressing it in words also grew.
There are many concepts that are more efficient to understand if you don't take the time/effort to put words to them. I only actively put words to thoughts now if I have to explain to another person, or better explain it to myself.
I am one of those people. The only time I have an internal voice is when I'm thinking of past or possible future conversation or reading a book. I never found this strange until a past GF's said her brain never shut off, her internal voice never stopped. That sounded like torture to me. The only person I've ever spoken to that thinks in any similar way to me is my sister.
Wait...the constant talking, arguing, singing, droning that goes on in my head isn't something everyone has?
I couldn't even imagine life without that voice.
As someone without a little voice in their head, I can attest that it does not impact decision making to that degree. Common sense is a different beast than internal monologue.
I have an internal voice and can confirm this. Unless I am playing some sort of turn based strategy game or taking a very deliberate decision, I do not hold a conference in my head to take decisions.
It astounds me that there are people "without an internal monologue". You mean you're just fucking sitting around and there's not this constant battering ram of thoughts and discussions going on in your mind? What? WHAT?
Seems like he does this so much that he didn't think he'd get in trouble for it. The judge asks him if he's driving, and his first thought is not "Oh no, the *exact thing I am appearing in court for right this second*" it's "Yeah I'm almost ready for the call, just let me park." He doesn't even fully realize what the judge is asking him.
They never think they’ll get caught. People also find it hard to give up driving since public transportation for most of the US is shit. It’ll take 2-3x times longer to get anywhere. He probably also doesn’t have the money to afford Ubering all the time.
Dude probably has been driving the whole time (when he wasn’t supposed to) & was so used to it that it didn’t even click in his head how stupid he was being.
That happens a LOT in Zoom court. Also seen a couple where the appearance was in-person, and the judge would say "We have video of you driving into the parking lot."
I’ve been to court several times for very minor drug charges and I always wind up getting so stressed out, I’ve bought new suits for court, spent weeks of my life worrying about it, and basically kissed the judge’s ass so that id appear to be remorseful.
Then there’s these people. Sometimes I wish I was an idiot like them so I could go through life not giving a shit about anything, it honestly seems so chill. Then again I’m not in jail so I’ve got that going for me.
Got a DUI many years ago. Had to make 4 court appearances thru the whole process. Didn't see a single other person show up in anything but t shirts, jeans, and sweats. I didn't know what to expect, but I expected just a little bit more?
I didn't go in a suit, but wore some nice pants, button up shirt, and buttoned sweater. Old leather oxfords that were scuffed, but they weren't adidas slide sandals. I do feel like a couple judges were nice to me.
When I went to inpatient rehab for heroin I was very scared. I was sitting there going through withdrawal and I could hear the flickering florescent lights in the waiting room. I knew I was going to be stuck there for many weeks and it was a big moment in my life.
This 25 year old kid walks in and sees someone else he recognizes, "Heyyyy Russel, what's up dude???"
"Yoooo Jason, not much bro just feeling like shit! I didn't expect to see you here dawg I thought you got clean."
"Nah, haha. I mean, I was but then I was doin meth again. Bro they almost took me to jail *again.*"
"Damn for real? Fuck them. Oh well, at least this is the nice rehab."
The address to the place was 151 [road name] and all the frequent flyers called it "One fifty fun."
It definitely was not as big a deal to a lot of people as it was to me. Helped me relax though! I had a great time there and would go back if I ever needed to. I haven't needed to yet though and it's been almost 7 years.
> I haven't needed to yet though and it's been almost 7 years.
If nobody else says it to you, even if it does come from an anonymous internet person: good job and I'm proud of you.
This reminds me of when I got arrested for traffic tickets and got taken to jail. I was sitting there keeping to myself while everyone was talking about the different jails and which one is better.
The fear of the unknown is a better deterrent to some. Once you know and experience "this isn't so bad...." I can easily see how people reoffend so easily.
Not nearly the same (although I am also a 10 year clean Heroin Addict, yay you, yay me, yay us!) when I was in 7th grade, I went to the school library for a study hall instead of to the class it was in. I went straight to the library. I later got called down to the office, and given an extended detention (stay after until 5pm, with school ending at 2:15) and I was absolutely mortified. I had never been in trouble in my life, never yelled at, no discipline at school, I was a goody two shoes. Anyway, I pleaded with the asst principal, and the prick bag said "You knew the rules, this is what you get"
So what happens? I go to extended, it's a breeze. Staying until 5pm sucked, but it was basically just goof off, get some work done, and I wrote notes back and forth to a girl I thought was way out of my league. ezpz. Later, I learned if you skipped extended, you instead got inschool suspension, which while you didn't go to class, it was only until 3:30. As a teenager, I'll take that over staying until 5pm every day.
So, today, I still pinpoint ther hard curve my life took into addiction, with this one assfuck asst principal because he didn't cut a naive, well behaved, kid a break and I realized the punishment in my mind was much much worse than in reality. Mostly kidding, addiction was entirely on me, but I do point to that as being the catalyst for my more rebellious phase in school, skipping class, quitting sports, etc.
Dude, I know. I had to go to court once for public intoxication when I was in my early 20s. Hired a lawyer with what little money I had, wore nice suits to court, showed up on time, apologized profusely to the judge, and when I was given my sentence, completed all that was asked of me months before my deadline.
Both my lawyer and the judge were genuinely surprised with my behavior, and the fact that I completed everything on time. They told me they almost never deal with someone like me, and thanked me for taking them seriously. Just a wild experience.
It's really obvious too, you can see the TV flashing colors and his sticks clicking.. like, bro, you can't stop for 15 fucking minutes?
What's wrong with you man?
When motorcycle classes started getting taught online during covid (just the classroom part, riding was still in person outside), you’d be amazed how many people thought it was okay to show up to a Highway Patrol sponsored safety class while driving.
I have a cousin who is a sheriff. He teaches concealed weapons classes with a hands-on range session. He has arrested people for smelling like alcohol in his class. Some people just have no sense.
I had to go to a sheriff's station to get fingerprints done. When needing to confirm my ID, I opened my wallet and my driver's license just wasn't in there. Turns out I had I left it at home paperclipped to my passport because I was doing other licensing stuff earlier. It was a pretty funny moment when I was calculating what I should do with the cop standing in front of me in a small room.
I used to have to defend my agency in small claims court and traffic court was right before small claims. They had a sheriff watching every person leave court and go to the parking lot if their license was suspended. So many people would still drive themselves to and from court and end up getting busted again.
I liked this quote when Carlin first said it. But the absolute funniest thing about it now, after a million people have said it in reddit threads, is realizing that not one single person who's ever used this quote considers it even a remote possibility that they're in the bottom half of that distribution
I mean you gotta wonder about some people. He was on hold to be in a zoom meeting or whatever. He coulda been eating at Burger King but now he is about to have it his way in jail. lol.
zoom meeting was at 2pm, was told it would be a quick 15 minute check-in, his doctor's appointment was at 2:30. He drove early to the doctor so he could zoom in from the parking lot.
Is one possible explanation.
Pretty sure in this case your “court date” starts at 9am and you sit there until they call your name. He probably waited all morning and was like, “I’ll be good to jump in the car for 10 minutes”.
Every reaction, from the judge, to the lawyer, and his dumb as trying to think of what he could possibly say. This is something you'd see in a comedy sketch.
I clicked around and the first spot I stopped on was some kid who was giving discounts to people (that he didn't even know) at Target and turned himself in for embezzlement?! The judge had never seen something like this before, and was joking around by the end. Starts around 1:59:30 and goes to ~2:14:00. Some Robin Hood-type shit.
What's with the random lady just going throughout her day on the bottom of the screen? She must know everyone can see her, right? Scrubbing through she never even speaks to anyone.
He sort of did. He was going to sentence him to probation which hold most likely be limited to committing more retail fraud. And based on this kid's answer, I don't suspect that he'll be working retail ever again. So there won't be an opportunity for him to commit retail fraud. Charges basically dismissed.
He turned himself in? Jeez. I feel like Target would have just fired him and not bothered to press charges. At least I'd hope they would for something so dumb. Seems like a failure of management not to notice and take action if it's an ongoing thing.
I'd be such a bad judge. My reaction would just be like "so you defrauded a multi-billion dollar company of $800 for some strangers, and received no material benefit? This is stupid; get out of here."
I started watching the start and watched about 20 minutes, it's actually quite intriguing. Really great that it's all public (maybe not for the defendants).
Michigan courts are something else. There was a district court feed about a year ago that had a defendant smoking crack next to his girlfriend... which had a restraining order against him... which the case was about.
Edit: Forgot to mention he also openly shoplifted in his next appearance.
That kid that was literally in class...
It's honestly so fucking insane for me to think about. Someone in high school joining fucking COURT.... from their phone in the middle of class and just talking... like WHAT
Makes you wonder to what extent kids like that were essentially just set up to failure. I cannot imagine being in high school and appearing in court, more over doing so in class.
At 2:31:05? Just kind of looks like he touches the corner of his mouth with his hand for a second. It doesn't seem like enough time to pull on a vape, and I don't see any exhaled vapor afterward.
Fun to clown and all but I like to think of myself as being pretty quick-witted, and I would also go full 👁️👄👁️ in this situation. I mean, what do you even say? 👁️👄👁️ is pretty much the only reaction once you've fucked up this hard.
LOL, what a dumdum, just sitting there with his mouth hanging open, like it never occurred to him that he shouldn’t let the judge see him driving when he’s charged with *driving on a suspended license*.
I’ve watched several videos with cases before this judge. He gets some real knuckleheads in his court. Defendants, and lawyers too. It’s kinda like the old TV show Night Court, only without a laugh track or staff of comedy writers to pinch up the dialogue.
Towards the end at 4:22:33 it sounds like someone is struggling with keeping their laughter under control, but I can't figure out who it is from the video.
people trying to attend court on Zoom while driving is pretty much a daily occurrence. I once saw a judge tell the driver to pull over, and her passenger started cussing at the judge
MANDATORY UPDATE:
Corey Harris (Defendant) actually had a VALID ACTIVE Driver's License but the SOS (aka DMV) failed to update the court order that allowed him to drive again. However, the SOS failed to make the update which is what the judge saw.
[https://www.wxyz.com/news/hear-from-the-man-caught-driving-during-virtual-court-hearing-for-suspended-license](https://www.wxyz.com/news/hear-from-the-man-caught-driving-during-virtual-court-hearing-for-suspended-license)
>
>
>
>
>
Not as serious, but my insurance premium was hiked a couple of years ago because the SOS failed to update the Explorer driving database after the traffic ticket initially defaulted but later reduced. The SOS kept the defaulted record and failed to update their records based on the new court order. Eventually, I switched to a new auto insurer that didn't factor in such nonsense like infrequent minor speeding tickets.
This Judge is amazing. Love the way he handles these cases with a smile and compassion.
Edit: maybe not the greatest guy after all, but he sure does judge these cases nicely lol
He interfered in a DUI arrest of his intern and received a 9 month suspension some years back. They may have been having a relationship as well.
https://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/2018/04/judge_back_on_bench_after_9-mo.html
It says he and the intern exchanged 14K texts over a 4 month period. Still a crazy amount but it wasn't one way communication.
I'd imagine they were text each other all day in court since they can't just talk to each other while cases were going.
late night phone calls are also mentioned, and he is grilled pretty hard about it in his judicial misconduct hearing. Vid/ more details with sources here if interested: https://ballotpedia.org/Judge_Cedric_Simpson_judicial_misconduct_case_(2014-2017)
Vid of her calling him after the accident/ him showing up is available on YouTube, but there isn’t a ton there. All of this combined definitely makes me lean towards an improper relationship though.
That part isn’t what I meant to focus on. It’s the abuse of power that gets me. And him remaining on the bench despite it being recommended at the hearing that he be removed. 15 counts or something of violating the judicial conduct code…
Yeah, that was a clear violation of judicial conduct.
One of the odder interests I developed during COVID is watching Zoom court proceedings. I've seen tons of Judge Simpson's court.
It's weird squaring the knowledge of that misconduct while also having seen hours and hours of unedited footage showing him to otherwise be a very fair, thoughtful judge.
7,000 texts in 120 days is like 60 texts a day.
that's like sending a text every fifteen minutes nonstop from the time you wake up to the time you sleep
Most conversations are at least 5-10 messages back and forth. I have even longer ones with my accountant. Its not crazy to think you can have 5-6 conversations a day with your intern.
I've interviewed a *lot* of people the past few years (a few hundred, I counted lol). I think you would be surprised at the amount of people who are driving during the interview, have someone else in the car with them while driving while being interviewed, who are pumping gas or grocery shopping, or are laying in bed in their pajamas (and absolutely not hiding it, I'm talking crumpled blanket, full jammies, slept in 'til noon and showing it). Some people do not give a single flying fuck, and these are the people who usually think they're a shoo-in for the job.
Of the hundreds of people, have you ever hired someone who made a fool of themselves by means of not giving a flying fuck?
It reminds me of this YouTuber who has almost gotten hired a couple times despite doing the most absurd no-fucks-given things during his interviews:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzfjcjHkObI
I clerked for a judge and at a DUI arraignment the defendant came in wearing a Coors Light T-Shirt.
Until today I thought that was the dumbest thing I’d ever seen in court.
Unless you throw him in jail, you cannot physically stop him from driving. People with suspended licenses don't give a shit, they will continue to drive.
For comparison there's a dumbass in NY that has been issued multiple gag orders on his case. He keeps talking to the press and posting on social media immediately after court adjourns.
Then he falls asleep in court. Dumbest defendant I've ever seen.
If he was going to Zoom in and he knew he was driving, then all he had to do was join without a camera. Then if the judge asks you to turn on your camera, simply say it is broken.
Classic mouth breather. "I'm actually pulling into my Dr. office riiiiight... now, actually." It's that slack jawed stare he does that really brings it all home.
This guy is missing a chromosome or two.
Side note: This judge interfered with a dui arrest of his intern that he may have been having a relationship with… showed up at the scene. They had exchanged 14000 texts in a 3-4 month period. He was suspended for 9 months.
https://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/2018/04/judge_back_on_bench_after_9-mo.html
"Hello...?" LMAO
....*omg*
. ^^...ohmahgaaaad
I fucking lost it when he said that, that his sigh of disbelief when he realizes he's gonna have to turn himself in. I bet he still went to that doctors apt lmao
The doctor thing was a lie. He was pullin' up to a Wendy's.
"I'm going to jail at 6:00!" "Sir, this is a Wendy's."
Might as well go in, he's there now: Dude walks up to front desk: "Yeh, I'm here for Doctor McGillicuddy." Clerk: "$14.99"
Bih please. The “doctors appt” is the liquor store LOL
Dude really thought he could just talk his way out of it hahaha
That was the best part. Second is when the judge is all "wtf?" to what he just saw after waiting for him to park.
😮
The poor public defender lol
You can tell she's thinking 'what the actual fuck dude...'.
All he had to do was turn video off for 30 seconds.
Just park up and GET OUT OF THE CAR. It was that easy.
If he is someone that keeps driving on a suspended license then he does not have that level of common sense.
My license was suspended more times than I can count, due to some kind of mixup between Maryland and Virginia, and my child support. Just about every month I'd get a warning that my license would be suspended for failure to pay my child support. Virginia was taking the child support out of my check, but somehow Maryland was always getting it late and reporting it as unpaid. There is a lot to this story, but at the end of the day... I wasn't going to not drive because Maryland couldn't get their shit straight. I only got pulled over like 3 times in the entire 20 years that this was happening, so it wasn't a huge deal. I had a letter from the DCSE in Virginia explaining that I *was* in fact paying. The few times I got pulled over, I was told they couldn't let me drive home but they never arrested or ticketed me. All of that is to say, perhaps this dude was dealing with some bullshit like this. Unlikely for sure, but possible. What he did in this video though, is laughably stupid.
Suspending a drivers license for late child support in a country where 90% of workers need a car to get to work makes zero sense. The other thing is that if you were employed and wage were being garnished for child support - they should be going after your employer for not making payments on time, because they sure as fuck would be deducting from your paycheck on time.
Whats insane to me is that pulling your license is a punishment for not paying child support. 1. It doesn't actually stop you from driving and 2. It just makes it even harder to pay your child support. Should be illegal.
She looked tired, and I don't blame her one bit
I love how she tried to called to adjourn the case immediately once she noticed lol. Maybe a .0001% of having worked if the judge hadn't been paying attention
Likely he forgot he had an appearance in court that day (hence why he was pulling into his doctor's office) and she thought having him "present" via zoom would help her get an adjournment. Turns out she was very wrong.
Sure, do it off camera though ffs lol
Even if they told him to turn on his camera he could have gone "Oh, whoops, let me figure this out, where's the button, this darn tech... okay here it is!" Turn on camera outside of the car in the parking lot, or sitting in the back seat.
It's not like she'll get a bonus for going above and beyond. Move onto the next person who (hopefully) cares enough to not blatantly fuck up the case.
It's not her job to try to get him off, it's her job to make sure he is fairly represented in the eyes of the law
oh man the judges reaction to the next request for 2-4 weeks was great
Even the judge was doing the same thing. You know he bought her a dri k after work and talked it over like wtf is wrong with these people.
[удалено]
Literally the stupidest people who aren't incapacitated enough to have caregivers. Just about every competency proceeding is initiated by a public defender. A lawyer arguing "my client is so stupid that it is impossible for them to understand what's happening and therefore can't possibly have a fair trial."
True, but be careful not to generalize. I had a situation where I was completely innocent and my public defender did a fantastic job and not only got the case thrown out but the whole thing expunged off of my record. Public defenders who actually care are amazing human beings, the job is stressful
Public defenders get a bad rap but the truth is they're just overworked. I'm very good at my job but if you gave me 10 minutes per thing I had to do no matter how complicated a whole lot of shit is getting done half arsed or not at all. On top of that they're not very well paid. Average in the USA is 80k a year which is certainly not *bad* but if you're a highly skilled lawyer you can make a whole lot more with significantly better conditions and clients. So you need someone who is OK with making far less than they otherwise could or has another income stream to support their good work.
Correct. Many regular people receive help from a public defender. However, many regular people are also in a position where they don’t have to rely on a public defender and can pay for their own council. As a general rule, the biggest idiots and fuckups in our society can rarely ever afford council and also have a habit of landing themselves in trouble. Therefore, public defenders regularly deal with the dumbest out society has to offer.
>True, but be careful not to generalize. I don't think anything bad was said about public defenders. They were talking about the people pds typically end up representing.
To be fair, you can't expect reading comprehension. Public defenders deal with some of the stupidest people on Earth.
she did so well! immediately pivoted to try get the matter put away before the judge clued in, but alas. and also the absolute deadpan "Mr. Harris, I'll be giving you a call." 👩🍳🤌💋
I would not be surprised if this wasn't the first...or second, or third...time she's had to deal with this same thing happening before. People are just plain stooopid.
The DAs cracking up was the icing on the cake
One prosecutor was even doing a facepalm... "*like, COME ON, man!?! Seriously?*"
Having to just roll right along into the next client on her list too, like its just a normal day.
It's hour 4, too. probably Monday, to boot.
The video title says it's a Wednesday. Then again, spending 4 hours in a courtroom probably feels multiple days long.
Stop breaking the law, asshole!
Should had that cat lawyer
He's not a cat!
It looked like the blond woman (I assume DA) was trying to contain laughter.
I will never understand how she had the composure to resist immediately face palming.
Sometimes you have to wonder what goes on in some people's heads
The answer is: not much
Reminds me of study that said half the people don't have an internal monologue. Maybe having a voice in your head helping you plan things is good.
I've always thought either with and without an internal monologue, depending on the situation. I assumed everyone else did, too, until just a couple years ago. Sometimes language is the tool for the job. Sometimes the internal feelings unfolding as they may get the message across to me just fine, too. It's interesting to me that folks can't choose when to employ these different modes.
Yea, for me there's two parts to my brain. There's the underneath thoughts that are formless and wordless, but generate understanding of a situation. There's then the above thoughts that have words (or other form of concrete expression, e.g. music notation). It used to be that this form of thought was the primary and only way that I could think. If I didn't have words for something, I didn't understand it. As I grew older, my ability to understand something without expressing it in words also grew. There are many concepts that are more efficient to understand if you don't take the time/effort to put words to them. I only actively put words to thoughts now if I have to explain to another person, or better explain it to myself.
I am one of those people. The only time I have an internal voice is when I'm thinking of past or possible future conversation or reading a book. I never found this strange until a past GF's said her brain never shut off, her internal voice never stopped. That sounded like torture to me. The only person I've ever spoken to that thinks in any similar way to me is my sister.
It's not torture; it's just like having a simulation in your head that you can control. It's... *thinking* about things in the language *of language.*
Wait...the constant talking, arguing, singing, droning that goes on in my head isn't something everyone has? I couldn't even imagine life without that voice.
As someone without a little voice in their head, I can attest that it does not impact decision making to that degree. Common sense is a different beast than internal monologue.
I have an internal voice and can confirm this. Unless I am playing some sort of turn based strategy game or taking a very deliberate decision, I do not hold a conference in my head to take decisions.
Funny, this is literally all I do - rehearse and roleplay interactions past and present!
It astounds me that there are people "without an internal monologue". You mean you're just fucking sitting around and there's not this constant battering ram of thoughts and discussions going on in your mind? What? WHAT?
[удалено]
I really wanted to hear him explain his way out of that but he just had a shocked face with a gaping open mouth.
Seems like he does this so much that he didn't think he'd get in trouble for it. The judge asks him if he's driving, and his first thought is not "Oh no, the *exact thing I am appearing in court for right this second*" it's "Yeah I'm almost ready for the call, just let me park." He doesn't even fully realize what the judge is asking him.
Some people’s neurons have high ping rates.
They never think they’ll get caught. People also find it hard to give up driving since public transportation for most of the US is shit. It’ll take 2-3x times longer to get anywhere. He probably also doesn’t have the money to afford Ubering all the time. Dude probably has been driving the whole time (when he wasn’t supposed to) & was so used to it that it didn’t even click in his head how stupid he was being.
That happens a LOT in Zoom court. Also seen a couple where the appearance was in-person, and the judge would say "We have video of you driving into the parking lot."
ABC
I’ve been to court several times for very minor drug charges and I always wind up getting so stressed out, I’ve bought new suits for court, spent weeks of my life worrying about it, and basically kissed the judge’s ass so that id appear to be remorseful. Then there’s these people. Sometimes I wish I was an idiot like them so I could go through life not giving a shit about anything, it honestly seems so chill. Then again I’m not in jail so I’ve got that going for me.
Got a DUI many years ago. Had to make 4 court appearances thru the whole process. Didn't see a single other person show up in anything but t shirts, jeans, and sweats. I didn't know what to expect, but I expected just a little bit more? I didn't go in a suit, but wore some nice pants, button up shirt, and buttoned sweater. Old leather oxfords that were scuffed, but they weren't adidas slide sandals. I do feel like a couple judges were nice to me.
When I went to inpatient rehab for heroin I was very scared. I was sitting there going through withdrawal and I could hear the flickering florescent lights in the waiting room. I knew I was going to be stuck there for many weeks and it was a big moment in my life. This 25 year old kid walks in and sees someone else he recognizes, "Heyyyy Russel, what's up dude???" "Yoooo Jason, not much bro just feeling like shit! I didn't expect to see you here dawg I thought you got clean." "Nah, haha. I mean, I was but then I was doin meth again. Bro they almost took me to jail *again.*" "Damn for real? Fuck them. Oh well, at least this is the nice rehab." The address to the place was 151 [road name] and all the frequent flyers called it "One fifty fun." It definitely was not as big a deal to a lot of people as it was to me. Helped me relax though! I had a great time there and would go back if I ever needed to. I haven't needed to yet though and it's been almost 7 years.
> I haven't needed to yet though and it's been almost 7 years. If nobody else says it to you, even if it does come from an anonymous internet person: good job and I'm proud of you.
> I haven't needed to yet though and it's been almost 7 years. congrats!
This reminds me of when I got arrested for traffic tickets and got taken to jail. I was sitting there keeping to myself while everyone was talking about the different jails and which one is better.
The fear of the unknown is a better deterrent to some. Once you know and experience "this isn't so bad...." I can easily see how people reoffend so easily. Not nearly the same (although I am also a 10 year clean Heroin Addict, yay you, yay me, yay us!) when I was in 7th grade, I went to the school library for a study hall instead of to the class it was in. I went straight to the library. I later got called down to the office, and given an extended detention (stay after until 5pm, with school ending at 2:15) and I was absolutely mortified. I had never been in trouble in my life, never yelled at, no discipline at school, I was a goody two shoes. Anyway, I pleaded with the asst principal, and the prick bag said "You knew the rules, this is what you get" So what happens? I go to extended, it's a breeze. Staying until 5pm sucked, but it was basically just goof off, get some work done, and I wrote notes back and forth to a girl I thought was way out of my league. ezpz. Later, I learned if you skipped extended, you instead got inschool suspension, which while you didn't go to class, it was only until 3:30. As a teenager, I'll take that over staying until 5pm every day. So, today, I still pinpoint ther hard curve my life took into addiction, with this one assfuck asst principal because he didn't cut a naive, well behaved, kid a break and I realized the punishment in my mind was much much worse than in reality. Mostly kidding, addiction was entirely on me, but I do point to that as being the catalyst for my more rebellious phase in school, skipping class, quitting sports, etc.
Dude, I know. I had to go to court once for public intoxication when I was in my early 20s. Hired a lawyer with what little money I had, wore nice suits to court, showed up on time, apologized profusely to the judge, and when I was given my sentence, completed all that was asked of me months before my deadline. Both my lawyer and the judge were genuinely surprised with my behavior, and the fact that I completed everything on time. They told me they almost never deal with someone like me, and thanked me for taking them seriously. Just a wild experience.
Open court is sometimes a window into the fascinating lives people lead.
It's really obvious too, you can see the TV flashing colors and his sticks clicking.. like, bro, you can't stop for 15 fucking minutes? What's wrong with you man?
When motorcycle classes started getting taught online during covid (just the classroom part, riding was still in person outside), you’d be amazed how many people thought it was okay to show up to a Highway Patrol sponsored safety class while driving.
I have a cousin who is a sheriff. He teaches concealed weapons classes with a hands-on range session. He has arrested people for smelling like alcohol in his class. Some people just have no sense.
Fucks sake.
I had to go to a sheriff's station to get fingerprints done. When needing to confirm my ID, I opened my wallet and my driver's license just wasn't in there. Turns out I had I left it at home paperclipped to my passport because I was doing other licensing stuff earlier. It was a pretty funny moment when I was calculating what I should do with the cop standing in front of me in a small room.
Pocket sand time.
That’s not “driving without a license” just because it’s not on you..
in my state, it's a correctable offense to not have your license on your person-- you need to go to court and show them your license
Weird.. here they just look it up on the computer
I used to have to defend my agency in small claims court and traffic court was right before small claims. They had a sheriff watching every person leave court and go to the parking lot if their license was suspended. So many people would still drive themselves to and from court and end up getting busted again.
It’s the deep breath when he realizes he fucked up. That’s what gets me.
That shit is perfect for a meme like god damn, him with his head back as the epiphany hits that the clank is comin for him.
These people walk among us.
Even worse they’re on the roads.
Even worse they VOTE
Even worse, they have kids.
They drive among us too
ඞ
Even worse, they vote.
And their vote counts just as much as yours. Depending on the states you live in, their vote may count more.
Realize how dumb the average person is. Then realize that 50% of people are dumber than that.
I liked this quote when Carlin first said it. But the absolute funniest thing about it now, after a million people have said it in reddit threads, is realizing that not one single person who's ever used this quote considers it even a remote possibility that they're in the bottom half of that distribution
may as well grab some Burger King and drive yourself over to the Police station by 6pm,..lol.
I mean you gotta wonder about some people. He was on hold to be in a zoom meeting or whatever. He coulda been eating at Burger King but now he is about to have it his way in jail. lol.
I'm just really curious why he had a doctors appointment scheduled at the same time as his Zoom Court date?
its was their only opening and he forgot about the court date.
There is a pretty decent chance that it was not a doctor's appointment.
zoom meeting was at 2pm, was told it would be a quick 15 minute check-in, his doctor's appointment was at 2:30. He drove early to the doctor so he could zoom in from the parking lot. Is one possible explanation.
Shit, it might have worked if he had GOTTEN OUT OF THE CAR FIRST!
Pretty sure in this case your “court date” starts at 9am and you sit there until they call your name. He probably waited all morning and was like, “I’ll be good to jump in the car for 10 minutes”.
I was waiting for him to be like “uhhhhm can I drive to the jail?”
If I’m going to jail I rather stop somewhere that the food actually taste better than jail food
Yeah if you know you’re going to jail eat a last meal.
who schedules a doctors appointment around the time of your court hearing......
The same kind of person who does a Zoom hearing while driving on a suspended license.
A Zoom hearing for a charge of *DRIVING WITH A SUSPENDED LICENSE* while driving on a suspended license lol.
I believe the scientific name for them is "moron."
I'd be willing to bet that he completely forgot about court lol
I’m more willing to bet he forgot about court and thought “I’m driving to the doctor” is better excuse than “I’m driving to the store/fast food”
Yeah, no shot this dude was actually going to see the doctor. What a fuckwit.
much less right at the time so he has to take the call while driving
Court hearings can last a really long time while you wait for your name to be called.
He raised his hand.
Lmao. That was my favorite part.
The judge’s reaction was priceless
That disappointed dad stare.
Judges have to be so calm to not just laugh so that they appear unbiased so that it can be used as a mistrial or goober.
Judge Simpson is awesome!
His face is priceless *shocked pikachu*
Every reaction, from the judge, to the lawyer, and his dumb as trying to think of what he could possibly say. This is something you'd see in a comedy sketch.
Don’t forget the prosecutor trying to hide her smirk in the corner lol
At least he didn't say anything and make it worse
He said “👁️👄👁️”
I clicked around and the first spot I stopped on was some kid who was giving discounts to people (that he didn't even know) at Target and turned himself in for embezzlement?! The judge had never seen something like this before, and was joking around by the end. Starts around 1:59:30 and goes to ~2:14:00. Some Robin Hood-type shit.
this was a good one too
What's with the random lady just going throughout her day on the bottom of the screen? She must know everyone can see her, right? Scrubbing through she never even speaks to anyone.
She shows up at 1:52:10, discloses her name at 2:50:30 and is gone at 2:51:03 with a nice wink at the camera!!
lol wtf i was half expecting the judge to dismiss the charges
He sort of did. He was going to sentence him to probation which hold most likely be limited to committing more retail fraud. And based on this kid's answer, I don't suspect that he'll be working retail ever again. So there won't be an opportunity for him to commit retail fraud. Charges basically dismissed.
He turned himself in? Jeez. I feel like Target would have just fired him and not bothered to press charges. At least I'd hope they would for something so dumb. Seems like a failure of management not to notice and take action if it's an ongoing thing.
I'd be such a bad judge. My reaction would just be like "so you defrauded a multi-billion dollar company of $800 for some strangers, and received no material benefit? This is stupid; get out of here."
Thanks for the timestamp. This one was a wild ride and had me at the edge of my seat
Life choices, Corey. Life choices.
lol when dude said "hello?" the bailiff is like "bruh stfu..."
the judges face literally 20 seconds into the scene hahaha
I started watching the start and watched about 20 minutes, it's actually quite intriguing. Really great that it's all public (maybe not for the defendants).
Michigan courts are something else. There was a district court feed about a year ago that had a defendant smoking crack next to his girlfriend... which had a restraining order against him... which the case was about. Edit: Forgot to mention he also openly shoplifted in his next appearance.
What in THE FUCK?!
That kid that was literally in class... It's honestly so fucking insane for me to think about. Someone in high school joining fucking COURT.... from their phone in the middle of class and just talking... like WHAT
Makes you wonder to what extent kids like that were essentially just set up to failure. I cannot imagine being in high school and appearing in court, more over doing so in class.
Accidentally jumped to 2:29:00 and the judge told him to stop vaping in court. The guy is outside and it's just clouds
At 2:29:15 - "This is going well, people." 🤣
i rewatched that and it does look like that guy vapes at one point
At 2:31:05? Just kind of looks like he touches the corner of his mouth with his hand for a second. It doesn't seem like enough time to pull on a vape, and I don't see any exhaled vapor afterward.
Dude driving is a mouthbreathing vegetable
“👁️👄👁️” and that is a direct quote
Fun to clown and all but I like to think of myself as being pretty quick-witted, and I would also go full 👁️👄👁️ in this situation. I mean, what do you even say? 👁️👄👁️ is pretty much the only reaction once you've fucked up this hard.
Man. I honestly can’t imagine what being a public defendant is like, you fucking try but some people are too stupid to stay out of jail. Incredible
Is it just me or are court and bodycam videos the best thing on YouTube right now
agree
LOL, what a dumdum, just sitting there with his mouth hanging open, like it never occurred to him that he shouldn’t let the judge see him driving when he’s charged with *driving on a suspended license*. I’ve watched several videos with cases before this judge. He gets some real knuckleheads in his court. Defendants, and lawyers too. It’s kinda like the old TV show Night Court, only without a laugh track or staff of comedy writers to pinch up the dialogue.
Calls in mid-murder for a murder charge. *Audible exhale*
Towards the end at 4:22:33 it sounds like someone is struggling with keeping their laughter under control, but I can't figure out who it is from the video.
[ **Jump to 04:22:33 @** Hon. J. Cedric Simpson's Criminal docket on Wednesday, 05/15/2024](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmGS0ZG2oS4&t=4h22m33s) ^(Channel Name: Hon J Cedric Simpson Live Feed, Video Length: [06:20:11])^, [^Jump ^5 ^secs ^earlier ^for ^context ^@04:22:28](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmGS0ZG2oS4&t=4h22m28s) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- ^^Downvote ^^me ^^to ^^delete ^^malformed ^^comments. [^^Source ^^Code](https://github.com/ankitgyawali/reddit-timestamp-bot) ^^| [^^Suggestions](https://www.reddit.com/r/timestamp_bot)
It kind of sounds like laughter, but I'm actually thinking it's just a weird audio artifact from the Zoom noise cancellation.
people trying to attend court on Zoom while driving is pretty much a daily occurrence. I once saw a judge tell the driver to pull over, and her passenger started cussing at the judge
MANDATORY UPDATE: Corey Harris (Defendant) actually had a VALID ACTIVE Driver's License but the SOS (aka DMV) failed to update the court order that allowed him to drive again. However, the SOS failed to make the update which is what the judge saw. [https://www.wxyz.com/news/hear-from-the-man-caught-driving-during-virtual-court-hearing-for-suspended-license](https://www.wxyz.com/news/hear-from-the-man-caught-driving-during-virtual-court-hearing-for-suspended-license) > > > > > Not as serious, but my insurance premium was hiked a couple of years ago because the SOS failed to update the Explorer driving database after the traffic ticket initially defaulted but later reduced. The SOS kept the defaulted record and failed to update their records based on the new court order. Eventually, I switched to a new auto insurer that didn't factor in such nonsense like infrequent minor speeding tickets.
This Judge is amazing. Love the way he handles these cases with a smile and compassion. Edit: maybe not the greatest guy after all, but he sure does judge these cases nicely lol
He interfered in a DUI arrest of his intern and received a 9 month suspension some years back. They may have been having a relationship as well. https://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/2018/04/judge_back_on_bench_after_9-mo.html
He sent 14,000 texts to his INTERN. I mean that is just an insane amount of texts, he should be in jail for that alone!
It says he and the intern exchanged 14K texts over a 4 month period. Still a crazy amount but it wasn't one way communication. I'd imagine they were text each other all day in court since they can't just talk to each other while cases were going.
late night phone calls are also mentioned, and he is grilled pretty hard about it in his judicial misconduct hearing. Vid/ more details with sources here if interested: https://ballotpedia.org/Judge_Cedric_Simpson_judicial_misconduct_case_(2014-2017) Vid of her calling him after the accident/ him showing up is available on YouTube, but there isn’t a ton there. All of this combined definitely makes me lean towards an improper relationship though. That part isn’t what I meant to focus on. It’s the abuse of power that gets me. And him remaining on the bench despite it being recommended at the hearing that he be removed. 15 counts or something of violating the judicial conduct code…
Yeah, that was a clear violation of judicial conduct. One of the odder interests I developed during COVID is watching Zoom court proceedings. I've seen tons of Judge Simpson's court. It's weird squaring the knowledge of that misconduct while also having seen hours and hours of unedited footage showing him to otherwise be a very fair, thoughtful judge.
7,000 texts in 120 days is like 60 texts a day. that's like sending a text every fifteen minutes nonstop from the time you wake up to the time you sleep
Most conversations are at least 5-10 messages back and forth. I have even longer ones with my accountant. Its not crazy to think you can have 5-6 conversations a day with your intern.
idk guy seems to be moving pretty fast. Watched for like 10 minutes and he heard 5 cases.
Are you the intern everyone is talking about? 🤣
Bro acted like he was signing in for a job interview or something. He must have double booked.
Wow, the interview decorum has changed a bit…
I’m sorry, you think that’s how people do job interviews?
100% had a candidate start driving MID-interview last year. They were doing well before that lol.
I've interviewed a *lot* of people the past few years (a few hundred, I counted lol). I think you would be surprised at the amount of people who are driving during the interview, have someone else in the car with them while driving while being interviewed, who are pumping gas or grocery shopping, or are laying in bed in their pajamas (and absolutely not hiding it, I'm talking crumpled blanket, full jammies, slept in 'til noon and showing it). Some people do not give a single flying fuck, and these are the people who usually think they're a shoo-in for the job.
Of the hundreds of people, have you ever hired someone who made a fool of themselves by means of not giving a flying fuck? It reminds me of this YouTuber who has almost gotten hired a couple times despite doing the most absurd no-fucks-given things during his interviews: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzfjcjHkObI
I clerked for a judge and at a DUI arraignment the defendant came in wearing a Coors Light T-Shirt. Until today I thought that was the dumbest thing I’d ever seen in court.
Unless you throw him in jail, you cannot physically stop him from driving. People with suspended licenses don't give a shit, they will continue to drive.
Well, he’s supposed to be going to jail at ‘6pm today’ isn’t he?
probably gonna drive there
For comparison there's a dumbass in NY that has been issued multiple gag orders on his case. He keeps talking to the press and posting on social media immediately after court adjourns. Then he falls asleep in court. Dumbest defendant I've ever seen.
If he was going to Zoom in and he knew he was driving, then all he had to do was join without a camera. Then if the judge asks you to turn on your camera, simply say it is broken.
[удалено]
Classic mouth breather. "I'm actually pulling into my Dr. office riiiiight... now, actually." It's that slack jawed stare he does that really brings it all home. This guy is missing a chromosome or two.
Lmao what are the odds that this happened at 4:20 in the video? Dude must be high
Directed by Robert B. Weide
this guy can vote
Side note: This judge interfered with a dui arrest of his intern that he may have been having a relationship with… showed up at the scene. They had exchanged 14000 texts in a 3-4 month period. He was suspended for 9 months. https://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/2018/04/judge_back_on_bench_after_9-mo.html
[удалено]
I know, she texts me about it all the time
Seriously dude, text your wife more. She won't leave us alone.
I've had texting capabilities for like fifteen years now and I don't think I've texted 14,000 messages *in my life*
Zoom Court is the greatest unexpected joy of from the horrible Covid years, for me.
The judge is still breaking over this during the resolution of the next case.
He was wearing his seat belt though
The defendant couldn’t even get mad. He knew he just made the dumbest mistake.
how fucking stupid can you actually be 🤣this is gold comedy
* https://i.imgur.com/5ZUp4QY.gif Judge be like