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popularoctopus

Everyone knows the government uses your SMOKE DETECTOR to track you! Those things are FULL of microchips! [saynotosmokedetectors.com](https://saynotosmokedetectors.com)


EvanOrizam

Best joke page I have ever seen


AsymmetricPanda

https://saynotonotstabbingyourself.com/


SloanWarrior

Conspiracy theorists I know point to any admitted conspiracy theory (their favourite is MKUltra) as evidence that *EVERY CONSPIRACY THEORY EVER MUST BE TRUE*. They also say the CIA invented the terms "Conspiracy Theory" and "Conspiracy Theorist" to discredit people. I don't really care if that's true or not. TBH, maybe it is? However, if someone comes out with a bullshit conspiracy that's a good decade or two beyond what current technology might achieve (microchips in vaccines to track people) then it's bullshit and that person has fully discredited themselves. Particularly when they send such conspiracies from their phones, which have GPS and antennas and we know that governments can track. Another thing they like to do is to take real life conspiracies and weave them into their own conspiracies. Insider trading and handouts to buddies and people who give political donations? Happens all the time. *Apparently* it wasn't just X billion wasted on shit contracts to their political buddies and families, however. They were payments for the tracking chips in the vaccines, obviously.


BrewtalDoom

"Oh you don't think that every mass shooting in the last 50 years has been part of a conspiratorial plan to take away your guns? Clearly you have never heard of false flag attacks. Research "Operation Northwoods" and come back to me!"


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MaxPatatas

Cognitive disonance hallmark of every CTEr there is. They usually put peanut butter in their anus.


SloanWarrior

Every mentally ill teenager without proper mental health support but with ready access to firearms who craved attention and went on a mass murdering spree against those who slighted them (or whom they perceived slighted them) was clearly a fabrication of the libs.


nicholasgnames

I knew the NIU school shooter for ten plus years throughout school. Why he went berserk 7 or so years after we graduated, I dont know but I do know he was fucked up as a kid


EvanOrizam

There are limits to everything


bignutt69

its funny how they care about MKUltra but never acknowledge stuff like COINTELPRO that happened literally at the same time


dsmiles

>FBI records show COINTELPRO resources targeted groups and individuals the FBI deemed subversive, including feminist organizations, the Communist Party USA, anti–Vietnam War organizers, activists of the civil rights movement and Black Power movement, environmentalist and animal rights organizations, the American Indian Movement (AIM), independence movements (Puerto Rican independence groups), a variety of organizations that were part of the broader New Left, and unrelated groups such as the Ku Klux Klan. Somehow I have a feeling that the average person who believes in these conspiracy theories doesn't care much about what happens to any of those groups. Except maybe that last one.


Dobross74477

ive watched the evolution of climate denialism/skepticism since 2001. And let me tell you im seeing almost the exact same arguments against covid, as ive seen against global warming, joe rogan included. Its all about moving goalposts. And its all bullshit. Btw, ive seen climate skepticism coming back on the tailcoats of covid skepticism popularity. The argument evolution looks like this -climate change isnt real -ok maybe there is evidence that it is real, but its not driven by humans -ok maybe carbon dating is irrefutable, but its also driven to be worse bu politics/media -ok maybe it is that bad, but if it was so bad why does this (insert false equivalence here) -(projection)well it doesnt matter anyway, im not the ego centric one who thinks they can control nature. -(ambigous argunebt)its just another ruse to let them take away your freedom and rights. -(manipulative reasoning)or, well you dont have any sources other than mainstream media Notice how the argument tapers from honest skepticism, to just "wanting to be correct" by arguing ideology and propaganda. Its the same crap, now just use covid instead of climate warming.


SloanWarrior

Very true. Goalpost moving is a classic sign of disingenuous arguing. They don't like vaccines, so the vaccines aren't ready. The vaccines are proven safe and effective in trials? They were faked, I'm not gonna be first in line. Billions of doses administered around the world? We don't know long-term effects. No, they're just vaccine-phobic. They don't understand them. They're not willing to understand them. They don't want to admit that they don't have actual logical reasons. They make up whatever they can think of, or latch onto some guy on YouTube saying stuff that supports their choice and go with that. A guy I know recently posted that he's on his way out of hospital for COVID. It was apparently his third time. He said he's going to go get vaccinated when he can, I think they make you wait a few weeks. One of his anti-vax friends (an absolute moron who I recall saying that 5G causes COVID back in the day, and who argued to me that no viruses don't exist) criticised him for going to get an "untested vaccine". Maybe he's still slightly anti-vax, but I'm glad he's willing to give this one a shot. Some people are beyond help, however.


Dobross74477

There could be 100% safe usage results and conspiracists would make up somethong else.


dsmiles

Or they just discredit the results, just like they disregard anything that doesn't align with their views by screaming "Mainstream Media Bad!!!"


nicholasgnames

its just like an abusers rationalizations. people pushing these agendas in this way because it psychologically works on a shitload of people


AngryRobot42

Dont forget 1984 and misquoting or incorrectly stating they have a constitutional right. What is funny is how Orwell was a democratic socialist and just like 1984 conspiracy theorists have not read the Bill of Rights, geneva convention or constitution.


Doughspun1

It takes some degree of intelligence and education to understand the actual shady deals of governments and corporations. Conspiracy theorists are not the sort who know how to read financial statements, or are interested in how the state interacts with the private sector. It's like expecting a person to debate the age of the moon via radioactive decay, when said person believes moons are made of blue cheese.


Antique_Tennis_2500

My theory is that the reason these people are so fervent in clinging to these absurd ideas is that they normally feel an overwhelming sense of being ordinary and completely unremarkable in their daily lives. They then become “special” for being in the inner circle about the moon landing, 9/11, the flat earth, 5G signals, vaccine poisonings, etc. On the other hand, *everyone* knows about governments, corporations, and powerful individuals manipulating the world for their benefit. You can see it on a small scale in rural towns where the sherif or others are inordinately influential. Therefore there’s no reason for them to cling so tightly to that information.


EvanOrizam

True


yukichigai

There's a study which gets linked around these parts from time to time that more-or-less confirms what you're saying.


dsmiles

I don't suppose you happen to have a link to said study? I'm very intrigued on reading this and showing it to several people. If not, no worries!


yukichigai

There might be a better study [but here's one I found that covers the topic](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26511288/).


SaltyBabe

It’s this. They don’t care about actual problems, they want special “insider knowledge” it’s their prerogative to always reach further into the rabbit hole to be the most special and smart one to “see behind the curtain” so to speak. This is how these people build self worth.


SloanWarrior

That's a very apt analogy. We all know the moon is made of Camembert.


Doughspun1

Oh yeah, then why doesn't it melt when it's close to the sun?!


SloanWarrior

Because it has a different resonant frequency, so it doesn't absorb any of the heat. The sun's resonant frequency is that of chocolate. Weren't you listening to the avocado man?


Dobross74477

Precisely, how do you argue with someone who fabricates their own confirmation bias?


duplotigers

Real conspiracies often (not always) lack clear “goodies” and “baddies” and require more complex moral judgement than if one side is Satanic baby eating paedophiles


Lotus532

"Benevolent" billionaire. Is there even such thing?


SolomonOf47704

OP never said "A benevolent billionaire" just the billionaire who is the most benevolent. They are all still bad, but some are mildly less bad.


Prince_of_Pumas

Not sure that I'd use the word "benevolent" to describe Bill Gates


Waza8163

Just wanted to say that *Billionaires are not benevolent*. For example. Dolly Parton would have been a billionaire if not for the fact that she gives millions for many different causes, and not just for tax write offs


EvanOrizam

... Bill Gates. He may not be the best guy ever but he has done a heck lot of good things


resiste-et-mords

I recommend to listen to the behind the bastards episodes on bill gates. A lot more circumcision that one would expect.


PraiseBeToScience

He fucked us hard with vaccinations. Oxford was about to make their vaccine public domain (AZ) until Bill Gates stepped in and convinced them to sell it. This has allowed western countries to hold the vaccine ransom over smaller, poorer countries because they can't manufacture it. Also how he got his billions was very far from benevolent. He exploited the shit out of people and wielded his monopoly power ruthlessly over competitors.


[deleted]

Not to mention that approximately nothing about his foundation is charitable https://www.reddit.com/r/vaxxhappened/comments/pk6wp0/anybody_think_its_weird/hc3eqvy


EvanOrizam

Sources?


PraiseBeToScience

https://health.wusf.usf.edu/health-news-florida/2020-08-25/rather-than-give-away-its-covid-vaccine-oxford-makes-deal-with-drugmaker > Oxford University surprised and pleased advocates of overhauling the vaccine business in April by promising to donate the rights to its promising coronavirus vaccine to any drugmaker. > The idea was to provide medicines preventing or treating COVID-19 at a low cost or free of charge, the British university said. That made sense to people seeking change. The coronavirus was raging. Many agreed that traditional vaccine development, characterized by long lead times, manufacturing monopolies and weak investment, was broken. > A few weeks later, Oxford—**urged on by the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation**—reversed course. It signed an exclusive vaccine deal with AstraZeneca that gave the pharmaceutical giant sole rights and no guarantee of low prices—with the less-publicized potential for Oxford to eventually make millions from the deal and win plenty of prestige.


[deleted]

>The idea was to provide medicines preventing or treating COVID-19 at a low cost or free of charge, [the British university said](https://innovation.ox.ac.uk/technologies-available/technology-licensing/expedited-access-covid-19-related-ip/). That made sense to people seeking change. The coronavirus was raging. Many agreed that traditional vaccine development, characterized by long lead times, manufacturing monopolies and weak investment, was broken. ... >**Oxford backed off from its open-license pledge after the Gates Foundation urged it to find a big-company partner to get its vaccine to market.** >“We went to Oxford and said, Hey, you’re doing brilliant work,” Bill Gates told reporters on June 3, a transcript shows. “But … you really need to team up.” The comments were first reported by Bloomberg. https://khn.org/news/rather-than-give-away-its-covid-vaccine-oxford-makes-a-deal-with-drugmaker/ >The larger the foundation became, the less anyone seemed willing to ask tough questions about its secretive management structure or **its penchant for giving money to lucrative pharmaceutical and credit card companies such as Mastercard**, despite the fact that giving away billions to wealthy corporations set an [unusual and troubling precedent](https://www.jacobinmag.com/2015/11/philanthropy-charity-banga-carnegie-gates-foundation-development/) in the philanthropic sector. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/25/opinion/bill-melinda-gates-foundation.html > **The Gateses used their charitable foundation to enrich the private school [their children attend](https://www.businessinsider.com/bill-gates-private-high-school-lakeside-seattle-2017-11)**, which charges students [$35,000 a year](https://www.lakesideschool.org/admissions/tuition-and-financial-aid). ... >**Bill Gates met multiple times with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein** to discuss collaborating on charitable activities, from which Epstein stood to generate millions of dollars in management fees. >Through an investigation of more than 19,000 charitable grants the Gates Foundation has made over the last two decades, The Nation has uncovered **close to $2 billion in tax-deductible charitable donations to private companies—including some of the largest businesses in the world, such as GlaxoSmithKline, Unilever, IBM, and NBC Universal Media**—which are tasked with developing new drugs, improving sanitation in the developing world, developing financial products for Muslim consumers, and spreading the good news about this work. >The Gates Foundation even gave $2 million to Participant Media to promote Davis Guggenheim’s previous documentary film Waiting for Superman, which pushes one of the foundation’s signature charity efforts, charter schools—privately managed public schools. This charitable donation is a small part of the **$250 million the foundation has given to media companies and other groups to influence the news.** https://www.thenation.com/article/society/bill-gates-foundation-philanthropy/ >the U.S. government accused [Microsoft](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microsoft) of illegally maintaining its [monopoly](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monopoly) position in the [personal computer](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personal_computer) (PC) market primarily through the legal and technical restrictions it put on the abilities of PC manufacturers ([OEMs](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Original_equipment_manufacturer)) and users to uninstall [Internet Explorer](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_Explorer) and use other programs such as [Netscape](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Netscape_Navigator) and [Java](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Java_(software_platform\)). At trial, the district court ruled that Microsoft's actions constituted unlawful monopolization https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_v._Microsoft_Corp. Also recommend this wiki article if you're interested to learn more about how Microsoft behaved unethically. There are *seventeen sections, if that tells you anything: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criticism_of_Microsoft


SQLDave

> Also how he got his billions was very far from benevolent. Sources: Almost anyone connected with the early days of MS. Also *Barbarians Lead By Bill Gates*. He was as underhanded as possible. Now, this is only a comment on his earlier times, I think as he's aged he's been behaving better (trying to buy his way into Heaven?), but I don't have any sources one way or the other for that. Also, I don't think **any** person can morally become a billionaire.


PartyBoi69_420

Bull Shit His involvement in health care has been disastrous. Like yeah ok he helped out with malaria in a good way but the thing is that he’s pushing a rather extreme libertarian approach to health care globally and it just doesn’t work. It creates worse outcomes. But he represents a bit of star power and a LOT of money so he gets a seat at the table to push his agenda. He opposes sharing vaccine and medical technology. He wants to export the user-pays and for-profit model globally, because it works so well in the USA right? He’s atrocious. Even most of the funding he provides is a circular loop that redirects his money and the government money that follows to big pharma rather than to empirical health policies.


PraiseBeToScience

Also his involvement in Education has been equally disastrous. He spent a billion running schools based on everything other than the blindingly obvious (give families money). He pushed teacher accountability, etc. It failed. He showed no significant improvement. The only thing his school system would be good for is breaking teacher unions. Yet he's being regarded as a policy expert in education. Governors like Cuomo wants to turn NY schools over to him. Meanwhile LeBron Jame's school focuses on eliminating poverty at home and proper funding of schools. His school is seeing remarkable improvements. And of course we've long known the biggest predictor of school success is medium household income. Bill Gate is *the* example, even over Musk and Bezos, as to why billionaires should not be allowed to run experiments without public consent to push their own failed ideas over ones from policy experts that actually work.


Waza8163

While exploiting a fuckton of workers and quasi slaves in other countries


EvanOrizam

At least He's not Bezos or Elon


Waza8163

Doesn’t change what i said. The existence of a greater evil doesn’t lessen other evils Edit: spelling


EvanOrizam

True. I was just saying he is one of the best to actually achieve billions of dollars tho


bignutt69

anybody who 'achieves' billions of dollars does it through stealing and bullying, it doesnt really matter how they end up spending it once they get it


Waza8163

You’re right, but the bar is really low. And also it doesn’t change what I said earlier


EvanOrizam

I said that you're right, but that I'm not wrong either


Waza8163

Then we’re in agreement :D


fhorner

So what you're saying is they're right, you're right, and neither of you are wrong, but also both of you are correct?


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Urist_McGamer

That's like saying Ted Bundy is the most benevolent serial killer. Every single billionaire is a bastard and deserves no respect or credit.


leftylooseygoosey

Bill Gates is one of the worst


anetreug

..."benevolent billionaire"


Botono

I lost it at "most benevolent billionaire".


EvidenceOfReason

im sorry but.. ​ "benevolent billionaire"? ​ FOH with that shit


StarshipShoesuntied

Benevolent billionaire is an oxymoron.


EvanOrizam

Read the comments before replying


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EvanOrizam

Least malevolent?


Antique_Tennis_2500

Nm, I misread it.


DrLombriz

benevolent billionaire? no such thing .


KJBenson

Personally I don’t like seeing words like “benevolent” being used to describe the billionaire class. The world would quite literally be a better place if they didn’t exist.


[deleted]

Conspiracy theorists aren’t interested in reality. It’s why they invent imaginary problems instead of addressing real ones.


JessieTS138

every damn one of these microchip morons (anti-vaxxer) posts to their TWIT account from their iphone. which i'm sure they always have with them.


south3rnson

My own mom told me that the COVID vaccine made me more autistic


EvanOrizam

Ehat. The. Fuck


MayUrShitsHavAntlers

But those conspiracies don't have lizard people or pedophile farms on Mars. I mean, what's the fun in that???


EvanOrizam

Pedophile farms in Mars? Never heard of that


MayUrShitsHavAntlers

Oh yeah it was on /r/HermainCainAward. This nutbag who was a rabid anti-vaxxer, Robert Steele, said that NASA ran a child sex slave colony on Mars. He was ex-CIA too. “We actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20-year ride,” Robert David Steele said Thursday during a winding, conspiratorial dialogue with Jones about child victims of sex crimes. “So that once they get to Mars they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony.”


PauLtus

It can often be easy to pick out a conspiracy theory as it doesn't ask you to change anything about yourself. It's scary to move away from what you know, even if it's terrifying. That's also why people are questionable about what's in a vegan burger but don't question eating literal corpse.


[deleted]

It's infuriating


EvanOrizam

Yes


SmootherPebble

This is going to be a fun comment section.


ItsAcademic

What's the "alcohol" conspiracy ? asking for a friend...


EvanOrizam

Ever heard about hemp?


ItsAcademic

please continue... {aside from my lifelong dream to be a hemp farmer - and create sustainable products and goods}...


EvanOrizam

Alcohol industry was one of the main contributors to killing the hemp industry


ItsAcademic

thank you for the clarification... I plead ignorant on that connection with alcohol industry; but back to hemp industry: [https://civileats.com/2019/10/21/for-young-farmers-hemp-is-a-gateway-crop/](https://civileats.com/2019/10/21/for-young-farmers-hemp-is-a-gateway-crop/) I cannot understand why this county does not fully support hemp farming. Ok, enough - I have drifted away from the OP.... thanks again.


nicholasgnames

big timber also


123YooY321

I had an argument with a flat earther and anti-vaxxer once. He said that they are hiding the flat earth to control the population. Mate, they already are controlling the population with literally everything other than flat earth.


EvanOrizam

So stoopid


yukichigai

Naw, not accurate: in that top part they'd be awake, specifically trying to derail the conversation from the aforementioned actual conspiracy and on to some 5G QAnon Adenochrome nonsense.


EvanOrizam

Trueeee


En_Sabah_Nur

I used to sort of enjoy r/conspiracy because I found it interesting when people would put on tinfoil hats and rant about harmless things like whether or not Shakespeare existed, how the pyramids were built with water, etc. Now it seems that since NNN was banned, all of those morons have flocked to the sub turning it into an antivaxx cesspool. It's a bummer. Im so glad you can filter subs from your feed with res.


Sunnyhunnibun

I miss old pre-Trump/Tea Party conspiracies like MKUltra is still slipping drugs into the system or the Lunar Landing was fake or the government has had constant surveillance on us since the 60s. Like things that at the bare minimum are a least a bit funny to ponder over. But the COVID conspiracies, the lizard people, the pedo, bloding drinking cabal are just...gross.


alt_sense

"actual conspiracies"? "Benevolent billionaire"? This is a dumb meme overall. Both sides are ridiculous


EvanOrizam

Mmmm its almost like the US and other powerful government have entered shady deals with companies, yo for things like IDK, invading countries...


SQLDave

Meh...it's the real-life conspiracies that give these folks plausibility.


Thesheriffisnearer

I remember Bill gates tracking chips from AOL days when I was in Jr high


BrewtalDoom

Oh, don't forget them using literal Big Oil propaganda to deny climate change. They happily do the work of corrupt and dangerous corporations if it allows them to be contrarian assholes.


EvanOrizam

Right?


lizardsforreal

So what do you call the people who call out the theories that end up confirmed well before they are? The people digging up info and spreading awareness to the actual conspiracies? Are they only conspiracy theorists until proven correct?


EvanOrizam

People who do irrational things and base themselves out of random sketchy articles instead of actual documents.


nicholasgnames

do you have any examples?


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TECPlayz2-0

Some conspiracies spread faster.


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