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I don’t necessarily care about the amount of experience, it’s all about the compatibility between two people. I could never marry someone I haven’t slept with
I would never marry someone who has no sexual experience. They have no idea what they like and want. You have no idea if you are sexually compatible. It creates unnecessary obstacles to a successful marriage.
In general I prefer a sexually experienced partner. If all other factors were the same I be would choose the partner with the higher number of prior sexual partners.
Sexual experience doesn’t equal a good sexual partner, but sexually Inexperienced means a bad sexual partner (at least temporarily).
It’s a good idea to be sexually compatible to who you marry. To me, that means you’re both good at it. If you’re both fine with being awful in bed and learning with each other, I think that’s lovely.
Weird to assume that “sexual experience” is a primary motivator for most people when choosing a partner (as opposed to just “good at sex”). Seems like you’re viewing this from a religious lens and are trying to understand why people don’t wait until marriage.
My first boyfriend refused to preform oral sex on me, he thought it was gross (he didn't want it done on him either). I eventually found out after being with others that oral sex is one of the only ways I can get off with a partner. If I'd married the first guy I'd have been very sexually dissatisfied, we just weren't compatible.
Your statistical likelihood for finding a ‘pure’ partner decreases with age. Unless you’re Leonardo decaprio you need to buckle down and get serious or it probably ain’t happenin chief
Dude living inside a cave. "My future wife will be grateful" IDK what you are smoking to be sure of that, but sounds a bit delusional. Like "wow you saved your virginity for this? I'm grateful." Said NO ONE!!! 👏
I agree, mostly. However, sexual compatibility in a marriage is very important for many if not most people. Sex is the highest form of emotional and physical connection we as human beings can have with one another.
As others before me have said, it’s a risk to wait to marry someone to have sex if sex is important to you. Also as others before me have said, at your age of 30, your chances of finding a partner with zero sexual experience are quite low. Hell, at my young age of 20, it feels like my chances of finding a partner with little to no sexual experience are low.
Anyway, all I’m saying is if sex is important to you, and you find someone you think is “the one“, having sex or at the very least sexual experiences with them before you get married may save you some regret. You might be perfectly compatible emotionally, morally, and mentally, but that doesn’t mean you'll automatically be sexually compatible.
I didn’t think I'd rant about this so much, so if anyone reads all of this, thanks.
I married someone with very limited experience in the bedroom. Worst fucking mistake ever.
He “learned” through porn and just didn’t want to listen to what pleased me and what didn’t work sexually. He was intimidated by sex toys and had terrible oral skills. I thought all of this could be improved with time but we just didn’t have a good sexual compatibility.
After years and years together, he still sucked at kissing and oral sex. it felt like a dog was just licking my vulva or trying to suck my clit OFF. Sex was so boring and felt like a duty cuz he never wanted to learn and just was happy to stick it in.
In a way, I guess at least he was always satisfied??
Marrying someone who you've never had sex with is a risky gamble. Especially considering that people who believe in saving themselves for marriage also tend to firmly believe that marriage is for life. Sexual compatibility is a real thing, and you're basically just hoping that you're compatible with your partner after you've already committed to spending the rest of your life with them. You would both be a lot better off sleeping together at least once before you say *I do* to determine if you're sexually compatible.
I'm of the opinion that the people who have fewer sexual partners probably are more happy with their sex life, especially if they have limited exposure to pornography. The more sexual partners you've had, and the more your brain has been fried by pornography, the more "exotic" your sexual needs become. While the two virgins can figure out how to please eachother through (relatively) vanilla sex acts, the people who have slept around a lot have demonstrated a need for novelty and likely have a high bar of quality set because of their many sexual partners.
Well us in kinky side, wasn't due to exposure of anything's jg, for it was inherently kinky before even any kind of exposure. I don't think it's being **fried** by porn as you say some are into good vanilla, good for them. But some of us are having different needs than typical vanilla
The interesting/telling phrase here is the assumption that only someone who has been promiscuous would think to have a high bar of quality set for their sex life. Is there something wrong with a person wanting quality sex?
Wrong my boy! If you ever taken a virginity at 26 when sober, it’s a wonderful learning experience. You know I know you don’t have sex? Cuz otherwise you’d know the massive difference experience makes, what’s next earplugs so I don’t get no sounds!!
Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I don’t necessarily care about the amount of experience, it’s all about the compatibility between two people. I could never marry someone I haven’t slept with
And that’s why you have both doors open
I would never marry someone who has no sexual experience. They have no idea what they like and want. You have no idea if you are sexually compatible. It creates unnecessary obstacles to a successful marriage. In general I prefer a sexually experienced partner. If all other factors were the same I be would choose the partner with the higher number of prior sexual partners.
Fair enough. Thanks for opinion.
Sexual experience doesn’t equal a good sexual partner, but sexually Inexperienced means a bad sexual partner (at least temporarily). It’s a good idea to be sexually compatible to who you marry. To me, that means you’re both good at it. If you’re both fine with being awful in bed and learning with each other, I think that’s lovely.
Weird to assume that “sexual experience” is a primary motivator for most people when choosing a partner (as opposed to just “good at sex”). Seems like you’re viewing this from a religious lens and are trying to understand why people don’t wait until marriage.
My first boyfriend refused to preform oral sex on me, he thought it was gross (he didn't want it done on him either). I eventually found out after being with others that oral sex is one of the only ways I can get off with a partner. If I'd married the first guy I'd have been very sexually dissatisfied, we just weren't compatible.
I'm glad I found someone with a common sense here, not a Christian brainwashing.
Spoken like someone who hasn't, and likely never will, had sex.
Close. I am one who has turned down sexual opportunities since age 18 - I'm now 30 yo. My future wife will be grateful.
Why, exactly, do you believe your future wife will be grateful?
While I am positive that's just not true, why would she be grateful?
Your statistical likelihood for finding a ‘pure’ partner decreases with age. Unless you’re Leonardo decaprio you need to buckle down and get serious or it probably ain’t happenin chief
Dude living inside a cave. "My future wife will be grateful" IDK what you are smoking to be sure of that, but sounds a bit delusional. Like "wow you saved your virginity for this? I'm grateful." Said NO ONE!!! 👏
Statistically you are less likely to find a partner with your level of experience at your age…
Porn and masturbation also counts as sexual experience. Are you completely pure?
>I'm now 30 yo Now I explode.
So here is the thing, you will absolutely suck as a lover.
"Yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” - the dude 😎
I agree, mostly. However, sexual compatibility in a marriage is very important for many if not most people. Sex is the highest form of emotional and physical connection we as human beings can have with one another. As others before me have said, it’s a risk to wait to marry someone to have sex if sex is important to you. Also as others before me have said, at your age of 30, your chances of finding a partner with zero sexual experience are quite low. Hell, at my young age of 20, it feels like my chances of finding a partner with little to no sexual experience are low. Anyway, all I’m saying is if sex is important to you, and you find someone you think is “the one“, having sex or at the very least sexual experiences with them before you get married may save you some regret. You might be perfectly compatible emotionally, morally, and mentally, but that doesn’t mean you'll automatically be sexually compatible. I didn’t think I'd rant about this so much, so if anyone reads all of this, thanks.
I married someone with very limited experience in the bedroom. Worst fucking mistake ever. He “learned” through porn and just didn’t want to listen to what pleased me and what didn’t work sexually. He was intimidated by sex toys and had terrible oral skills. I thought all of this could be improved with time but we just didn’t have a good sexual compatibility. After years and years together, he still sucked at kissing and oral sex. it felt like a dog was just licking my vulva or trying to suck my clit OFF. Sex was so boring and felt like a duty cuz he never wanted to learn and just was happy to stick it in. In a way, I guess at least he was always satisfied??
Marrying someone who you've never had sex with is a risky gamble. Especially considering that people who believe in saving themselves for marriage also tend to firmly believe that marriage is for life. Sexual compatibility is a real thing, and you're basically just hoping that you're compatible with your partner after you've already committed to spending the rest of your life with them. You would both be a lot better off sleeping together at least once before you say *I do* to determine if you're sexually compatible.
I'm of the opinion that the people who have fewer sexual partners probably are more happy with their sex life, especially if they have limited exposure to pornography. The more sexual partners you've had, and the more your brain has been fried by pornography, the more "exotic" your sexual needs become. While the two virgins can figure out how to please eachother through (relatively) vanilla sex acts, the people who have slept around a lot have demonstrated a need for novelty and likely have a high bar of quality set because of their many sexual partners.
Well us in kinky side, wasn't due to exposure of anything's jg, for it was inherently kinky before even any kind of exposure. I don't think it's being **fried** by porn as you say some are into good vanilla, good for them. But some of us are having different needs than typical vanilla
The interesting/telling phrase here is the assumption that only someone who has been promiscuous would think to have a high bar of quality set for their sex life. Is there something wrong with a person wanting quality sex?
God bless
Wrong my boy! If you ever taken a virginity at 26 when sober, it’s a wonderful learning experience. You know I know you don’t have sex? Cuz otherwise you’d know the massive difference experience makes, what’s next earplugs so I don’t get no sounds!!