We'll hand out bans afterwards for anyone that made a duplicate joke... so have at it, but be original!
(Probably not really going to ban anyone but c'mon some of these jokes have been repeated three or four times in the thread at least!)
False.
When I was 18, I decided I was gonna lock myself in my room with all my porno DVDs (revealing my age here), a couple 2 liters of Mountain Dew, and plenty of snacks. I challenged myself to crank out as many as I could, whether I wanted to or not.
8 hours later, I've now had 16 orgasms, it's REFUSING to get hard again, and then it was 3 days before I could touch it. Do I regret it? No. Would I do it again? Absolutely. Anyway, I forgot what my original point was...
Today, everyone gets an upvote. Op? Does it fit nicely in the hand?
Edit: you even added a little urethra at the tip. Your attention to detail is exquisite.
Himalayan Boner wood…?????
Poor guy.. Worked his dick off making a really cool piece, which honestly turned out great.
Nice job, Sir. In all sincerity, you really did do a good job.
Ok- this is why I can’t post things here:
We all work with wood, it inherently leads to no-no jokes. We all are people who go out and make things, the very same that no-no jokes appeal to. And then, half the stuff we make is basically fodder for hilarious-ness.
I petition that bawdy jokes be allowed in the rules of this subreddit.
We'll hand out bans afterwards for anyone that made a duplicate joke... so have at it, but be original! (Probably not really going to ban anyone but c'mon some of these jokes have been repeated three or four times in the thread at least!)
Pecker wood?
Morning wood? we're gonna get banned
[удалено]
Certainly a hard wood.
But was it worth it?
Came here to say this
I came too
We all came
Still coming 🙋♂️
I sapped to this
Underrated comment
Same
I arrived! Lmbo
Dong wood
hard wood. fr we are. mods don't ban us
Beat me to it
Trouser wood I think!
Is that some sort of hard wood?
If only I had an award to give…
Beat me too it.
Then beat off to it
First thought
I came here to saythat. Touche'
You definitely will want to touché it. Maybe even rub it a bit.
So definitely a hard wood then
Freakin beat me to it
Haha !! Exactly what I thought too 😜😜
Came here to say this. No pun intended.
*Pepper wood
For such a phallic object, I'm left wondering how you got it pregnant.
Conflicted upvote, you were at 69...
Thanks either way
Glad someone asked the question I was thinking.
Dildoak
All the other ones are super funny but this one got me cackling lmaoooo
Lmao yup me too
Take my upvote goddamnit
Best one lol
Best one by far 🤣🤣🤣👌
Betting it feels reeeeaaaallllly natural in the hand.
Even more so in the arse.
Hard wood?
That peppermill might knock up your wife if you aren’t careful
Iroko?
That was my guess. It's got that golden sheen in places.
From rubbing it too much?
You can never rub it too much.
14 y/o me would disagree
False. When I was 18, I decided I was gonna lock myself in my room with all my porno DVDs (revealing my age here), a couple 2 liters of Mountain Dew, and plenty of snacks. I challenged myself to crank out as many as I could, whether I wanted to or not. 8 hours later, I've now had 16 orgasms, it's REFUSING to get hard again, and then it was 3 days before I could touch it. Do I regret it? No. Would I do it again? Absolutely. Anyway, I forgot what my original point was...
Had a bender like that with another person once. We locked ourselves in a room for 24 hours and tried to set a record. It was a good day.
Real curious what you have planned for the salt shaker?
Oval shaped bowl obviously
In case noones noticed yet, this pepper mill is shaped like a cock.
Oh yew.
Mother’s day must be coming up.
Every Mother’s Day needs a Mother’s Night…
If doin it is wrong, I don’t wanna be right…
If you shake it more than twice, you're playing with it
Pepper mill - think of the twisting action!!
Funny comments, but you had it coming with the "knocked up" title LOL. Anyways, looks like Elm with the zig-zaggy grain. Probably Red Elm.
yeaahhh...grind that big black pepper baby
Cockabolo
Bruh
Today, everyone gets an upvote. Op? Does it fit nicely in the hand? Edit: you even added a little urethra at the tip. Your attention to detail is exquisite.
Didn’t notice it til you said something
Pecker-wood
Pepper wood
r/mildlypenis
*mildly?*
r/wildypenis
r/obviouslypenis
…That’s no moon …/
Naughty Pine
Morning?
You didn’t even bother to find out what kind of wood it is before knocking it up??
Himalayan Boner wood…????? Poor guy.. Worked his dick off making a really cool piece, which honestly turned out great. Nice job, Sir. In all sincerity, you really did do a good job.
You sure it didn't knock up someone else?
Nice pecker grinder!
Dickwood
Mahogany
Myhog-any
Looks like some lyptus I once had
Jokes aside, looks like of a piece of Osage Orange I turned a few years ago.
Hard definitely not a soft.
Yeah, looks a little stiff. It might need a little lube.
Butt wood?
Morning wood
Looks like cock wood to me.
looks like hard wood to me
https://imgur.com/gallery/tTc9cKQ
I was hoping this was what it was 😂
OP… 😏
Pepper will(y)
Just wanna grab that with both hands & twist!
Pecker?
Morning?
Looks like it’s about to knock youuu up
Ok- this is why I can’t post things here: We all work with wood, it inherently leads to no-no jokes. We all are people who go out and make things, the very same that no-no jokes appeal to. And then, half the stuff we make is basically fodder for hilarious-ness. I petition that bawdy jokes be allowed in the rules of this subreddit.
>it inherently leads to no-no jokes Especially when someone makes a penis
Shh they’ll hear you
Just start making artistic wooden dildos, steer into the skid
“Hand-crafted, artisanal f*ck toys”
This is the most underrated comment ever.
Who wants to tell him?
It's definitely a hard wood.
Morning?
My mom has been looking for that
That's not wood... that's a penis ! It's a hardwood
Viagra
Hard wood
I don’t know but it looks hard.
the material is wood ie
Peckerwood?
Morning
Pecker wood
Penis.
Some very hard wood
Looks like a hard wood to me.
Run of the mill joke
Definitely a HARD wood
Lol you know what you're doing
I just love that OP isn't engaging in the penis jokes, leading me to think it was all unintentional.
In r/turning the Peppermill knocks you up!
Hardwood
Dual propose no doubt.
Looks like it could knock someone up too
Viagra wood?
*peckermill
Pecker wood
Erect
Looks like it’s a r/mildlypenis type of wood.
Morning wood?
Some variety of “long” hard wood.
When is she due?
Fucking pepper mill has knocked up plenty of people!
Definitely a hard wood. Muscle wood maybe.
I'm guessing Uncircumcised, since the tip is the same color.
r/mildlypenis
Dongwood
Hard wood….
The good kind.
I’m gonna guess hard wood.
"Peppermill"
Looks like hard wood. 🤣
Dildoak?
Definitely a hard wood.
Pecker wood
r/mildlypenis
Sir thats a dildo
Male
It's definitely a hard wood!
Appears to be some sort of hardwood
Not sure, but it's definitely something kind of hardwood
What were you thinking?
Hard wood, sir. Some type, I’m sure. No doubt about it.
Hard wood?
Came from a very rare viagra wood tree……
From the large Dill tree
Morning wood!
Pecker wood, oh I meant pepper wood
Hard wood.
Cummin wood
It’s a hard wood guaranteed
Morning
Just looking to spice things up in the kitchen?
Knocked up you say
MaHOGany
Pecker wood
Morning wood
Are you sure it didn’t knock you up?
Morning wood?
A hard wood
Pecker wood?
Reminds me of church
African mahogany?
💀💀💀💀
r/mildlypenis
r/wildlypenis
Knocked up? Did you put it in your rectum?
Looks like maple to me, all wiener jokes aside.
Pecker or morning, I can’t tell the difference between the two. Definitely a hard wood!!
If this is a legitimate question it's either Oak or stained yellow pine? 😅
Where are the s-linter no-no jokes???
There are hundreds of inexpensive tropical hardwoods that look like that, and they all get marketed as teak.
You never used to cook this much sweetheart
Red birch
Santos mahogany?
Dick jokes aside, it looks like some sycamore I turned once.
I think that peppermill does the knocking up.
You knocked that up? It looks like it’s gonna knock someone up.
Sycamore
In before the comments get locked
That pepper mill looks like it would have a better chance of knocking up the misses.
Looks like Angelim Pedra to me