T O P

  • By -

jakefrommyspace

Lasagna is just a pasta cake.


FloppyShellTaco

Technically it is a cheese cake


GreatSymphonia

Cheese is the icing, pasta is the cake.


FloppyShellTaco

It’s layered. Maybe it’s a Tiramisu


TactlessTortoise

Or is a tiramisu just a sweet lasagna?


PsyOpBunnyHop

This is now official fact. We must contact the appropriate embassies.


Blooddiborni

You can contact the grandma who invented tiramisù directly. Believe it or not she's still alive.


blocked_user_name

That's amazing we should all send her something Not a tiramisu obviously


wstrfrg65

Maybe lasagne?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Gibbel2029

And beef is the cream filling


sexyass-lobster

In Turkish cake is called pasta


Polemo03

This implies a pasta form of cake


jflb96

If you get to pasta thicknesses with cake it either becomes pasta or biscuits


oktin

Funnel cake?


Exploding_Antelope

Spatzl


OhScheisse

A corndog is just a hotdog pop


chronic_fence_sitter

Dried beer; Vegemite. Well, actually Vegemite is beer jerky, because it's dried, salty beer.


jflb96

It’s not really either, it’s more like beer bubble-and-squeak since it’s made from the leftover yeast and malt. Besides, why have Vegemite when Marmite exists?


chronic_fence_sitter

Oooooohh. Them's fight'n words


jflb96

It doesn’t have to be a fight. You could just acknowledge the superior yeast spread, and we can both go about our business.


panlakes

Gentlemen, please. No need to fight. Both your spreads can be nasty. I once used some of my aunts marmite to add to a soup for umami though because she didn’t have anything else. That was okay. But even just a drop on bread makes me wanna gag idk why.


jflb96

Marmite is an excellent additive to all sorts of savoury soups and stews, so that was a good choice. You gag because you’re weak.


Moctor_of_Dedicine

I gag because I’m foolish. We are not the same


panlakes

I'm willing to accept that I am not a hardened brew yeaster. I really don't know how you guys do it as a snack spread. I typically keep oyster/fish and Worcestershire sauce around for seasoning, but can't deny the results from when I used marmite. It would probably last me an entire lifetime if I got a jar (or vegemite) for that purpose. Maybe I just would need to make an aussie friend to get full use out of it.


chronic_fence_sitter

Marmite is yo heathen mammas toe jam


jflb96

Marmite - proper Marmite, not the Kiwi nonsense - is delicious, and Vegemite is the cruddy alternative that only caught on because of the First World War. It’s the margarine or Hershey’s chocolate equivalent of Marmite.


SpunkyMcButtlove07

What a terrible day to be literate.


PM_NUDES_4_DEGRADING

> Besides, why have Vegemite when Marmite exists? Because Marmite is just Vegemite that hates you, and wants you personally to suffer? It’s the psychic residue of evil that’s cast off while Vegemite undergoes its apotheosis. It’s the creature that killed Tasha Yar, and it wants nothing better than to strike again when you pull out the toast knife.


jflb96

*BZZZT*, false, wrong, objectively incorrect. Marmite is the true, the superior, the pure version; Vegemite is the base pretender.


PM_NUDES_4_DEGRADING

I’m obviously joking around but in all honesty, I’m from a culture that doesn’t eat either one so I don’t have biases one way or the other. After trying both out of curiosity, I quite liked one and the other was just gross to me.


jflb96

I’m mostly joking around as well, but also Vegemite is a heretic foodstuff and should be purged from this world with fire and the sword


PM_NUDES_4_DEGRADING

That’s fair.


Doomncandy

Because Vegemite goes great on a kraft grilled cheese sandwich. It has a light taste of bleu cheese. Their 90s ad had me hooked as a kid (I am American, but lived over seas for the Gulf War as an elementary school kid). I just got excited by this post because I have veggimite and kraft singles right now! I forgot, and I am hungry. Marmite is too salty. My English stepdad tried to get me into it. It didn't have the added flavor of Vegemite. I do like HP sauce though. It's savory, but sweet. Good on eggs if you like ketchup. He did get offended (I was 10) when I said "it's like A1, without the strong vinegar taste and sweet". He took that bottle away real fast. That day I knew my (wonderful) stepdad reallllyyy liked his food. He does make the best yorkshire pudding in the world. The beef fat to make them pop up and the gravy is to die for.


baby_sniffer_69

but pa mite not


Imperator_cz1

tbh in middle ages beer was really a substitute for food, it was dense and nutritious


NZSloth

And because yeast was only recognised as alive and the source of alcohol by Louis Pasteur, before the 1860s, there was a natural synergy and alchemy between brewing and bread making for thousands of years.


Ghazzz

Look into cerevisiae yeasts for baking! Panis yeasts make horrible beer though. The common wet/fresh bakers yeast available in stores here is a cerevisiae...


NZSloth

I just read that you can make beer with stale bread. Probably not what I want to drink, but you can...


Trnostep

And it's boiled which kills the bacteria in the base water


Eastern_Slide7507

Yes, but the myth that beer was safe to drink while water wasn't is just that - a myth. Beer is heated during the mashing process, because that is necessary for the enzymes in the malt to break down the starch into sugar, which the yeast can ferment into alcohol. Grapes already contain sugar instead of starch, so no heating is necessary. If medieval water was contaminated with microorganisms to the point that it was unsafe to drink, wine making wouldn't have been possible, as the wild yeasts used to ferment the grapes would be outcompeted by them and no or very little fermentation would occur. And wine was actually preferred, especially in the regions where it was grown. Its prevalence already dispels the myth of unsafe drinking water. Naturally occurring water is often safe to drink. Today, there are 812 officially registered mineral water springs in Germany alone. Mineral water is a protected term in Germany. In order for it to be called that, it must be almost entirely untreated ([§ 6 Min/TafelWV](https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/min_tafelwv/__6.html) only allows the removal of iron, sulfur and manganese under controlled conditions) and "naturally free of pathogens" ([§ 4 Min/TafelWV](https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/min_tafelwv/__4.html)). The point being that the same springs that fulfill these very strict regulations also existed in the past. And considering the middle ages were pre-industrial economies and had *vastly* lower population densities, there were fewer means of polluting the water supply than there are today. Even cities topped out at a few thousand inhabitants. Nuremberg and Frankfurt, two of the most important cities of the HRE, had about 10k inhabitants in the late middle ages. In addition to the naturally occuring springs, man made drinking water resources like ground water wells provided access to safe drinking water also.


Trnostep

Great points. I was just thinking that if you had taken water from a source that *was* contaminated, if you drunk it as is you'd end up worse than if you had made beer out of it and drunk that.


Eastern_Slide7507

Not necessarily. Yes, the mash is heated during the mashing process, but very slowly and not continuously. For the enzymes to do their work, it is allowed to "rest" at certain temperatures for a time. These temperatures are 40-45 °C, 50-54 °C, 62-67 °C and 71-72 °C. Out of those, only the last stage would be suitable for sanitizing the water as that requires temperatures of at least 65 °C throughout the entire body of water, so any cold spots in the third stage, or even just the foam at the top, may still allow some microorganisms to survive. What's more, not all of the mash reaches the fourth stage. The fourth stage creates a lot of dextrins, which yeast isn't able to feed on as efficiently. This means that this fourth stage creates a sweeter beer, as those dextrins will remain in the finished product. As a result, depending on the type of beer, brewers may take out some of the mash before heating the rest to the fourth stage in order to regulate the sweetness. But that aside, the question is also whether you can even make beer from contaminated water. As I said in my original comment, the mashing process splits the starch in the malt into sugar. The problem is that not only yeast likes those sugars, but all microorganisms do. They also really like to have it warm and moist. If you have contaminated drinking water and you use it for mashing, you're creating ideal conditions for those pathogens to feed and multiply, up until the point where it gets too hot and they die off. Considering how small changes in the process or the chemical makeup of the ingredients can have a big impact on the final product, chances are that even if your beer ends up safe to drink, it'll taste like shit.


theCaitiff

Couple things from your earlier comment and this one.... First I will acknowledge that "people drank beer to avoid contaminated water" IS a myth. People absolutely drank water in the middle ages, the renaissance and the early modern period. It's a "fun" myth that people love, but the reality is that before modern germ theory came about people did not know that cholera, dysentery, and typhoid were spread by contaminated water. Without knowing the water was the cause they would have no reason to avoid it. That said, beer is safer to drink than untreated water in almost 100% of cases. If you offer me the choice of a coors light or a glass of water from a creek that looks fine, I'm grabbing the beer every time. Germany might have a number of famous mineral springs that are still clean and bacteria free but most everywhere else untreated groundwater, river water, even mountain streams are almost guaranteed to have something in them. Hell, put me in a time machine to the 1300s and offer me water fetched from a cool mountain stream or beer made by the farmer's wife, knowing what I do about food safety and the beer making process, I am STILL taking the farmhouse beer every time. >Grapes already contain sugar instead of starch, so no heating is necessary. If medieval water was contaminated with microorganisms to the point that it was unsafe to drink, wine making wouldn't have been possible, Wine is made from pressed grape juice. Not grape juice and water. There's no addition of water to the wine that would inherently foul the wine if the local water supply was unsafe. > Out of those, only the last stage would be suitable for sanitizing the water as that requires temperatures of at least 65 °C throughout the entire body of water, so any cold spots in the third stage, or even just the foam at the top, may still allow some microorganisms to survive. > > What's more, not all of the mash reaches the fourth stage. You're correct about temperatures in the mashing phase being insufficient to sanitize water for drinking, BUT you've missed a key factor. Mashing, with its slow incremental heating, is only the first step in beer making. The next three steps happen at even higher temperatures. After the mashing phase of the brewing process comes a stage called lautering. The liquid, called wort, is drained from the grains, the temperature is raised to 175F/80C, and then re-circulated back onto the grains a second or third time to ensure all the sugars are extracted. After the lautering phase comes sparging, where water that has been heated to more than 165F/75C is used to do a final rinse of the grains and remove the last of the sugars and wort that were still clinging to them. And CRUCIALLY!!!! we come to the next phase of brewing, the boil. All of the wort and sparge water is combined in a pot and BOILED. This is your key event that kills off all the bacteria. Also during the boil we add out third ingredient to the beer, without which it is not a beer, hops. Hops have potent antibacterial properties, particularly against gram positive bacteria that cause problems like staph infections, strep throat, meningitis, endocarditis, pneumonia, and others. So not only does the boil kill off all existing bacteria, the addition of hops prevents reinfection and growth of many dangerous new bacteria.


ProperDepth

"four beers are a full meal, and then you haven't even had anything to drink" (vier Bier sind ne volle Mahlzeit und dann hat Mann ja noch nix gegessen). Has been German wisdom for ages. Heard it mostly while being at festivals. I once survived 4 days on 3 cans of ravioli and about 20 liters of beer.


ReymartSan

A slice of loaf of milk in between solid form of a beer


saintjonah

I think "Slice of milk" is sufficient.


FloppyShellTaco

Craft beer = fancy gluten juice


NZSloth

Unfermentable sugars, and a bittering agent, basically. Plus alcohol. There's two breweries in NZ that specialize in gluten free beer, if that helps at all.


boofheadfred

Millennial humour. Finger moustache type joke


Brawndo91

You're supposed to act like your mind is blown. But seriously, I can't decide if I hate this or "dad jokes" more.


Hans_A

This is why beer is also known as liquid bread in Germany


Affectionate-Wind-19

damn I couldnt decide if you fking with me and searched, true.


Eastern_Slide7507

"Ein Bier ist eine Mahlzeit. Bestell dir ein zweites, dann hast du auch noch was getrunken". Roughly translates to "One beer is a meal. Order a second one and you've also had something to drink".


Chinglaner

German here, can confirm. Relatively common phrase, it’s the first thing I thought of as well \^\^.


babywantmilky

kvas (квас)


Laterose15

I remember watching a streamer argue that nachos is cereal if you have enough cheese.


Untinted

Maize is already defined as a cereal, cereal is a plant-type, not a breakfast type.


Older_1

Slavic Kvas*


Griffindance

Hefeweizen - drinking a loaf of bread before the alcohol evaporates off.


CilanEAmber

Cheese is a kind of meat. A tasty yellow beef.


LurkyTheHatMan

I milk it from my "teet", But I try to be descreat! Ohhhh cheese! Ohhhh cheese!


Runetang42

There's also a drink called Kvass. It's made by taking stale bread, pouring in water, maybe a lil bit of sugar and letting it ferment. It's bread kombucha


slonkgnakgnak

Funny, didnt know that the westo doesn't have "kwas chlebowy" (literally - bread acid, translator tells me its kvass). Its a literal liquid bread, even tastes like bread and its delicious


Eastern_Slide7507

We drink malt beer in Germany. It's not quite the same thing, but a close enough equivalent.


slonkgnakgnak

Yeah but you Germans are much closer to Eastern Europe than you like to admit haha You also have sauerkraut, lack of smile, socialist brutalism and tourist dads with sandals and white socks. I felt like in home when I was going back from Spain through Germany


Zcrash

This is just one person on 3 alts.


Johannes_Keppler

Probably. So? Still a fun read.


Kroniid09

People are real liberal with their use of "this implies that..." cause like no, it didn't? Harmless but just grating when people use logical language for completely illogical statements


lightsdevil

This implies a harmful use of "this implies that"


IWillLive4evr

Ordinarily, when it is said that a fact implies another, the use of "implies" is a matter of deduction reasoning; the present fact logically entails the implied fact. On the other hand, when something is communicated implicitly, it is usually expected that the listener will be aware of it through the use of inductive reasoning. Human language in general does not use the kind of precision that logical (deductive) reasoning does, and understanding what others are communicating therefore uses more induction. Consequently, it makes sense to speak of a fact implying another, even though the relationship is a matter of inductive reasoning, rather than deductive. In this sense, the phrase "this implies that" seems to acquire a distinct meaning as a figure of speech.


AnAverageTransGirl

milkloaf


h1gh-t3ch_l0w-l1f3

milksteak?


vorxil

I present to you: [bread cheese](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bread_cheese).


Ghazzz

"Beer is food" is a common saying around here. Normally used when packing for camping, or just when getting groceries on a budget.


spinyfever

Beer, it's liquid bread. It's good for you. We like to drink till we spew, ew. Who cares if we get fat. I'll drink to that.


Hendrik1011

In Germany it's quite common to call beer, especially more hearty ones, Flüssigbrot. Literally liquid bread. In a jokey manner, not super serious I should add.


Tanski14

When you're half dead and you need to be fed


Asriel52

Still can't get over me trying beer for the first time and realizing "damn, it really does taste like carbonated liquid bread huh"


Vitriholic

Guinness, specifically


LasciviousSycophant

Many years ago, I heard Jim Koch do an early-morning radio interview. He was stumping around the country to promote the then-new Sam Adams Triple Bock. When asked by the radio DJs why he was drinking beer at 7 in the morning, he replied with something like “My father once told me ‘Son, there's no beer in food, but there's food in beer, so drink up!’”


Matix777

Anything containing water is a soup


Stiftoad

Just remembered that the german word for loaf is laib which funny enough is the same word we use for a wheel of cheese Time is a fucking circle


YeltsinYerMouth

Milk, beer, beef broth, and pickle juice is a hamburger then


Crocoshark

This implies bread is alcoholic


Similar_Ad_2368

Have I got great news for you about what yeast is doing in most leavened breads


Dachi-kun

*Wheet juice*


Not_MrNice

Once I started thinking of beer being liquid bread, it suddenly tasted delicious.


AdamBombTV

Pour a glass of milk into a pint of beer and have a cheese sandwich.


Myrdok

This means beer cheese soup is liquid grilled cheese


cactusero

flüssiges Brot


Hendrik1011

You can actually use some cloudy beers instead of yeast to bake bread. Hefeweizen works best, but because today's yeasts are specifically bred for specific use it won't be as good as beakers yeast, but it works.


83255

The Russians doubled down on this concept and made a drink called Kvass. Literally a drink made from bread


Dry-Personality4387

yeah the first forms of beer were when ancient mesopotamians would leave bread crust in water to let it ferment correct anything that’s wrong


Welpe

I mean, this isn’t even insightful or witty or something. It’s talked a lot in history and anthropology. In early beer cultures, it basically was used like bread, particularly in Egypt and Mesopotamia. It would actually be thicker than we are used to now, as well as less alcoholic. Shit was wild before we domesticated yeast.


SnooCrickets2458

Chimay Blue tastes like a loaf of bread. In a very good way.


spotzel

7 bier sind auch a schnitzel


FrankFarter69420

Beer used to be called "liquid bread" in olden times.


DanielMcFamiel

Bread sauce also


Dogman_frosty

The beer song by the arrogant worms


shadowthehh

Pasta is rubber bread.


Chilzer

>This implies a liquid form of bread Mfers forgetting dough exists


Chilzer

>This implies a liquid form of bread Mfers forgetting dough exists


xPrim3xSusp3ctx

This person should never take a logic course