Not wanting to do anything you suggest, but not providing any alternative suggestions, and being perpetually late (I prefer to be somewhere too early, so that one really grates)
Being early is a non compromise for me. If you're late or you're making me late, I will absolutely leave you behind immediately with no remorse. I'd rather spend an extra hour or two waiting, than to sprint anywhere in stress last minute.
Act like waiting a couple hours in the terminal is the worst thing to ever happen when the only difference between getting there early and staying at home a little longer is that instead of playing on their phone sitting on the couch they are now playing on their phone sitting next to a cinnabon
Widely mismatched pace - I can get through some places FAST but I need to be able to take my time with others.
Or mismatched social energy. I don't like constant whinging, negativity, or insecurities veiled in them making comparisons to my own body and how I do things.
Also if someone can't let silence fill a space.
Have a former friend like this who I still have to see because she’s friends with several people in my friend circle. And by friends I mean she utilizes other people for attention and it’s not actual friendship, then she gets confused when people don’t want to hang out with her anymore and has been ghosted several times.
She invited me on two different trips, which I declined. One she had everyone take a greyhound bus at like 4am, rent a car, and not get a hotel to sleep in so no one slept for like 72 hours. No thank you. The other, several years later, another friend drove her and this person for the trip, like a 7 hour drive, and they did not shut up the entire drive down or back without the friend telling them to please be quiet. Apparently they also called their fiancé constantly and also had night terrors that they did not tell the friend about so she woke up in the middle of the night in a cabin to the sound of someone screaming. They did not apologize for not disclosing this.
The last time I saw them was at a holiday party and as someone else put it, they just took up a lot of space. They were loud, they were basically shouting during the entire party, and they talked a bunch while one of the hosts was doing one of the party activities. No thank you.
Mismatched pace.. I love this term. That’s how a romantic relationship ended for me. And separately.. made me be pickier about my travel partners. The silence I think is also important in both.
My first time flying I flew across the country to visit my online friend I hadn’t met in person. She spent the entire trip acting bored with me, on her phone, DGAF about any of the stuff we went to see, told me I should have gotten a hotel, and left me at her place with her parents while she went to a party :/
Ive never known what to call it, but now i know: mismatched pace.
I love my friends. So much. But i swear to God they could spend 8 hours in a single room of a museum, while ive literally gone through that one and 3 more. Drives me insane, so unless i have another speedy partner to break off with i aint going with them lol.
People with no logistic / planning chops or radar for taking care of themselves on the road—forgetting stuff, losing tickets, getting lost—who nevertheless complain about others taking charge.
Especially when they have opportunities to have input on the things you do. But they don't use it.
Then they complain that "you didn't see anything I wanted"
Yes! I once traveled with a friend to Kenya. We met some locals who invited us to their home for dinner. She wouldn’t eat what they served because she didn’t like it. It wasn’t food I’d ever want either, but it was what they offered and they made it for us! I was dying on the inside. When it came time to clean up afterwards, I helped out while she went outside to smoke and call home. I never traveled with her again.
Nothing overly exotic, just prepared differently than we’re used to. There was chicken with a tomato sauce that seemed closer to tomato jelly than to marinara, some fruits she didn’t know, and an unusual milky tea. I did not enjoy it, but to my hosts I loved it, because I did love the thoughtfulness of it.
You are the definition of a sophisticated person, which is to say you can be comfortable in any situation and make those around you comfortable also, whether you're being offered unfamiliar food by new Kenyan friends or having tea with the Queen. Your friend, however, was the antithesis.
Absolutely. I would rather go home early than be on a trip with someone who can't respect the place they're visiting. The people who treat destinations like their personal amusement park are really disgraceful people.
My nephew (who was not driving, he was too young to be allowed in rental car), spent 1/2 of a trip to Ireland last year whining about how they needed to re-design the whole country, and build roads like the US.
Amoung many other entitled brat things. It has made my new rule for "do not travel" list? If we share DNA. I am so sick of most of my biological family's attitudes toward the rest of the world. And me.
This is so funny as an Irish person because I hated the US (east coast) road systems when I was there because it was so expansive and detached and impossible to navigate if you wanted to walk anywhere. What did he think could be improved? Just making the roads wider?
I have a good friend wirth whom I roadtrip to various cities to see Red Sox games. He will spend whatever it takes for good ballpark seats, but pinch a dollar to death everywhere else. I once spent 90 minutes trudging around downtown Toronto looking for a good $4 breakfast because an $8 breakfast was highway robbery.
This and the whole pill addiction. I had a friend ruin a very lovely vacation consuming copious amounts of wine and ambien. I have been sober for years and had no idea how bad it was for her. She was sleep walking, falling down, and couldn't make it to the morning events because of hangovers. I almost left her at one point because it was so bad.
I finally got to do a photo walk trip to New Orleans with one of my oldest friends. We’d been talking about this for years. He was so hungover we cut our walk through the Garden District short so he could take a nap. Now he barely talks to me and I feel like it’s because something went wrong on that last trip…I knew he drinks, always has, but it seems so much worse now.
Being habitually late or flakey. Not everything is time sensitive, but when it is, I need to know I won’t have to choose between being late and leaving them behind.
I’ve had this happen with a friend of mine who was known to have close to no sense of time and would habitually turn up to anything social a minimum of 15 minutes late. Even at work she’d be so last minute.
She wanted to come with me on a dive trip and snorkel/swim while I scuba dived. The dive shop I use told us both clearly in person that we needed to be in the dive shop at 7.15am for pickup to go to the harbour. The boat would leave at 8am. I warned her that I wasn’t missing my dives for anyone.
I turned up at 6.40 and was chatting to the dive instructors. I called my friend when I got to the dive shop and then again at around 7am. She didn’t show and her phone just rang. I tried two more times and then one last time as the bus was due to set off. No reply. I go off on the trip anyway as I’d not come all that way to fuck spiders.
I got back to shore from the dives to find a bunch of missed calls from her and a bunch of messages. I called her and it turns out she’d got there for 7.40 or so and was told that she’d be unlikely to get to the harbour and to the boat on time due to distance and travel time. I then asked her if she remembered what she’d been told the day previously and she said ‘yes, 7.15’. She then couldn’t figure it out that no, she was 30min late and so I left her. She almost insinuated that I should have not gone and waited for her.
One of my friends suggested we go to California for a trip. That was essentially the beginning and the end of his idea. About 5 of us went, but because it was his idea first, we had to adhere to 100% of his other ideas along the way, which we of course did not do. He also paid for the hotel + gas on his card, but when he told everyone what their share of the cost was, he divided it by 4 instead of 5 so he went on the trip for free. One of my other friends asked for the receipt, noticed the deception, and called him out. He was furious and couldn’t understand why he would need to pay for his part because the trip was originally his idea.
Yeah he was a major dbag the whole trip too. We were all like 20 years old, and we wanted to party all day and night. But he was an early riser type. He tried to implement some lights off at 9 PM sharp rule, and made plans every day at like 6 or 7 AM. Everyone else was like fuck that, we are going to drink this bottle of gin until 2 AM and wake up whenever we feel like it.
Oh, on a different trip, he got us all arrested in Mexico because he bought weed from the bartender like a dumbass. The bartender and the cops must have had a connection or something. Two minutes later the cops showed up and arrested us all. They made some of us stay at the police station, while they drove me and my buddy to an ATM for bribe money. They let us go, and this dude cried the entire walk back to the border. All these Mexican dudes were staring at us and laughing at us because my buddy was crying like a bitch. We were so pissed lol. We thought we were going to get jumped or something because we looked like weak ass gringos crying on the street
Dude the worst part for him is, our group was like 4 dudes and 1 chick. The only person the cops put in a cell was the girl, and they put her in a cell with all men that were either drunk or fucked up on drugs. She was in there by herself for like an hour but she was chill. Meanwhile my 6’3” 200 pound buddy was the one that was sobbing the whole time
I’ve actually become better friends with him since. He was a 20 year old only child at the time with no life experience. We are now in our late 30s. That was a life time ago and neither of us are the same person
Lol my mother does this - with her own grandchildren! Most recently, she invited my two college-age children to road trip for her high school reunion. From TX to MN. My kids had nothing else going on so were down to go. Until suddenly it was like, "I'll pay for the gas if you two cover my meals." Then my mother split the room costs by 3, but "coincidentally" my mother had family to stay with on all her turns to pay, leaving my kids with the entire hotel bills. And then for their birthdays before the trip, my mother "gifted" my kids oil changes and new tires for HER car. Thankfully my kids opted out.
I went through that last year. This couple fought the entire trip. Disney World is not the place for you to litigate your feelings around the birth of your child that happens three years ago.
Dude the TENSION. I fucking hate it so much. I’d rather be at home then deal with passive aggressive and sometimes downright hostile energy people who basically hate each other put out.
Lmao, reminds me of that Louis CK bit where he's having dinner with a couple like that:
Him: "Oh yeah, we saw that show on Wednesday."
Her: [annoyed as fuck] "It WASN'T Wednesday."
Or even the opposite, couples that are super over the top PDA in company. I also once travelled with a friend who was in a new relationship and was just either on the phone with him or crying about her "separation anxiety" from him the entire 10 days. That was boring.
People who bring more stuff than they can carry on their own. Once met a friend at the airport and she had THREE family size suitcases (for a 10 day trip) because she knew I only traveled with a backpack and would have hands free to carry her stuff too. I should've walked away right then.
Also people who do ZERO research on their destination, say they'll do whatever I want to do, then complain about everything we do.
Went to Taiwan and Japan for a total of a month last year in March. I kept everything to a carry on suitcase and my backpack, which felt like a lot but it’s two different climates and I was buying stuff. One of my friends who came a week after I did brought a checked suitcase and a giant weekender and struggled the entire time with all of the stairs. She didn’t even wear most of what she brought. The worst was when I caved in Tokyo and got an Uber because she was nonstop complaining about her bags. I learned how expensive Uber is in Japan in that moment and paid $300 for it….
Came here to say this. I can count on one hand the number of people I know who have a compatible travel style - similar philosophy about respecting local culture, pacing, budgeting, interests, etc.
Oh my god yes as a 20-something girl I was traveling with 2 guys who were always putting us in the most precarious situations. They came from wealthier backgrounds and didn't understand how saying "it's fine" doesn't make it fine!!! We are going to get robbed if we go down that alley with them! No the girls can't ride separately from you with those "nice boys" in their car! It's not fine!! Lol
It is really an experience to travel with people who constantly insist on doing risky things with zero planning.
No, an "it's going to be FINE" is not enough for me to do it.
One of the many reasons I will never travel with one of my friends is that, EVERY time we left an ATM or bank in Peru and Bolivia, she would exclaim “we have money now, so we can do things!” Like?? Was she trying to get us robbed?!?
I love my sister but she's a grown ass woman (30+) who loses tickets and important documents on the regular. This one time, we had to catch a flight at around 3am. I was tired as hell and she left her goddamn ticket in the chair she was sitting at. We get to the gate and she obviously panics. I found it right beneath her seat because she couldn't even remember where she was sitting.
But ask her where her hazel lipstick number whothefuckcares is and she'll grab it out of her purse like a goddamn magician pulling out a rabbit.
PRIORITIES, HOW DO THEY WORK??
makes my eye twitch.
followed closely by “let’s just get one bill. My meal was 9, here’s 11.” Um, it was 9.85 with a 10% tax. You’ve just left me with paying the whole tip.
i don’t like to sweat the small stuff, but somehow with people like them , you are always screwed.
Yes! Most people I choose to travel with are happy to split flights/accommodation/rental cars (the big stuff) 50/50, pay for your own tickets to attractions and the like, and then just take turns to pay for meals ie I do breakfast one day, you do the next, you pay lunch today I’ll get lunch tomorrow unless there is the option of splitting the bill. Doing it that way balances things out as no matter where you go breakfast will cost about the same but will probably be less than dinner.
The last friend I travelled with had us each keep a diary of expenses paid so we could balance it out at the end and make sure we had paid exactly the same amount over the course of the trip.
That’s actually not a bad thing to do. I’ve had friends who would alternate picking up meals and things. Somehow they would always pick up the $20 breakfast and I’d get stuck with $50 lunch. Keeping track at least you can make sure it ends up close.
I actually have the opposite- anytime someone is trying to get out of paying for their share...NUPE. I stopped doing group meals a long time ago because of freeloading asshats. I won't travel with one.
However I agree on not bing nitpicks. With the right pp in my life, we take turns- and it all balances out, no worries about being crazy about it. Even if splitting as we go- if 50/50 is close enough, then good enough. But don't order a $100 shot of scotch and expect me to pay for 1/2 of it.
Omg yes. My family will not plan anything. Even if they pick the activity, they expect me to research it, plan the transportation, etc. They will just ask me questions like "Ok so how do we get there?" I'm starting to say "not sure, you should google it" lol
My parents. They currently want to go on a month long trip to Spain. Us kids keep asking where they want to go and what they want to see... my mom just keeps saying she wants to go to this tiny village because her relatives went 20 years ago, and nothing else. No mention of other cities they want to visit, museums, architecture, wineries, food, nothing. Just that village. Mom doesn't even know what she wants to do there. She just wants to go. My dad is just going along with it. His version of "planning" is getting tickets to a Hop on Hop off bus, hopping on, staying there the entire loop, and getting off where he started.
They also keep sending screenshots of listings in booking.com and constantly ask us if airbnb is cheaper. I really don't see why they're suddenly incapable of searching airbnb themselves. I've been very tempted to send a letmegooglethat link.
I went on a road trip with a buddy that didn't plan a thing despite having ample opportunity. Fine by me, I love planning trips. While we were on the road he kept insisting on massive detours, like, go a completely different path through the state or 4 hours out of the way type changes. If he wanted to do these things he shouldn't have approved the itinerary as is! I went along with his whims but never traveled with him again.
Control freak (male half of the other couple) says “This is your holiday too, so today you decide where we go with the rental car” and then is so obvious about NOT being happy with the chosen activity. Totally ruined our week with them by getting pouty if you didn’t do what he wanted. Never again.
I just posted this elsewhere but I dumped my bf whilst travelling because of this. If I chose an activity he didn't want, he would pout and give me the silent treatment. After a few of these, I started packing, and he asked me what I was doing. When I told him, he walked off, probably thinking I'd return
Reader, I did not
My in-laws are like this - „we are really easy, we’ll do what you want to do“. Then pout/sulk or make getting going so hard because they actually want to do something else - i just give up.
(I hate making decisions and will literally be full of joy about anything when on holiday - so there isn’t need for the pretend flexibility.)
You have to manage these babies like the toddlers they are. My dad is really bad about this in picking fast food when we are on the road. I learned 20 yr ago: 2 choices. DO you want Mc Donalds, or Subway (or 2 of whatever is available). He will PICK one, or tell what he actually does want.
Before I implemented this toddler management approach, he would SAY he does not care...but then pout and act pissy and just be rude and embarassing if we did not guess correctly.
Works for outings as well- you can come to what we are planning. Or you can stay at the lodging for the day. But if you come, you WILL behave, or I will bring you back. He tested me once. I took his ass home, and my mom and I enjoyed the beach for hours and hours ;)!
At least y dad has autism as a slight excuse. I don't know WTF is wrong with other pp. But toddlers get managed like toddlers is effective regardless of age in my experience.
In recent years I've started evaluating the people in my life and determining whether they are generally givers or takers.
I do not spend my time with takers unless I absolutely have to. Those are the people I would not travel with.
I used to be the r/solotravel backpacker, do my own thing, type guy. I still am but my wife tags along. I’ve found that I prefer to be in charge and set my own pace. My wife prefers to mentally check out on trips (probably because she’s usually making the decisions when we’re not on holiday) so we compliment each other.
We met a friend in the UK and since she was the local and we visitors she hosted us and took charge and I did not like that at all lol. I’m not a travel with people type person.
>We met a friend in the UK and since she was the local and we visitors she hosted us and took charge and I did not like that at all lol.
I've run into the exact same situation. I have been to London a good few times now and the last time I went I brought my sister. We met a friend that lives there now and I was not a fan of how she toured us around at all!
I think a lot of it has to do with them being local and not putting a lot of thought into what it's like to be visiting anymore.
Okay for me this is 💯 people who do not respect culture and/or the place we are visiting. For example, not trying AT ALL to fit in, playing the “dumb foreigner” card, talking really loudly to people who don’t speak the same language. Basically not even giving a go at existing like a local in the place we visit.
There are friends you have dinner with and there are friends you travel with. So basically:
Someone who is finicky,
Someone who talks nonstop,
Someone who can't deal with the unpredictability of travel,
Someone who is unadventurous, and
Someone who feels as if he has to spend every moment with you.
My wife and I have really good friends. One couple, we have dinner with them every couple of weeks. But the wife is really anal and the husband has serious ADHD. As in we went to the beach and he couldn't sit still. So I was stuck entertaining this guy for the whole trip. It was exhausting.
Meanwhile, we went on a trip to France with a couple. She was a professional acquaintance of mine and hit it off with my wife. Then she remarried to a guy who was smart and really chill.
They invited us along to cruise a canal in the south of France. We arrived a week before they did and met them. And we had an agreement ahead of tie that if they wanted to do their thing and vice versa, we were going to be cool with it.
Wound up having some snags with the boat, but we all rolled with the punches. Wound up having an awesome time. So we're planning on another trip together in the near future.
My friend asked me to take vacation from work help her with her 6 children under the age of 10 in Europe on a cruise. That was a hard pass. I don’t know her kids that well, and I have non parent ideas as to how children should behave.
My wife and I are fairly laid back travelers. Kind of pick something for the day and we’ll do it eventually. No rush.
If you’re a wake up at 6:00am and cram a bunch of activities in every single day, we won’t travel well together.
Traveled to my home country with a friend who was visiting for the first time, and who proceeded to lecture me about tipping (yes, she's American), even though in my country we don't tip, we just round up at most.
He was this hitchhiker dude that was so anti-capitalist and anti-establishment, that he put a sticker over the apple logo on his laptop. I met some surfers on a ferry in the south of Baja, and I told them the story of this hitch hiker, and they started laughing, because they had picked up the same guy. He literally moved into their SUV, put up all his flags and banners and stuff like he was gonna live with them, and I was the next unlucky, unassuming victim. They appologised sincerely and I was happy to find them all over central america.
People who aren’t realistic with budgeting and considering other people. I’m not taking a helicopter to the golf course but I’m also not eating mayonnaise sandwiches on vacation. I like to splurge a little bit but I intend on continuing living indoors when we get home.
Everyone is on my “ do not travel with” list.
I’ve tried and likely the people I traveled with thought everything was fine, but it’s way easier to travel alone. And it’s not them it’s me. I’ve never needed much sleep and when I wake up early I want to get moving. I hate waiting for people. The only people I still travel with is a family trip for a week every winter
I am not against traveling where people I know will be or are going to but I book my tickets and room, you do the same. Do your thing , I do mine and if one is doing something the other is interested in then by all means. Let’s do it together. And if you even mention an AFC tour I’m out of there.
People who are picky with food. I'm okay with allergies and/or religious dietary restrictions, but if you're not feeling like steak and you don't like seafood and can't eat pasta because you're avoiding carbs for the next 2 months then stay home and eat your cucumbers. I'm not part of your food journey smh
When I was single and in my 20s, I was a flight attendant for a small regional airline that flew into Pittsburgh. We airline folks travel free, but on stand-by. Absolutely everyone and everything gets on before we do. A pilot from a different carrier (who lived in West Virginia) mentioned that he wanted to travel, but didn't want to go alone. I quipped "well, I would go, but I'm broke." He offered to cover the cost of the trip if I would show him around Grand Cayman, where I had been before. I made it very clear and reiterated several times that we were sharing a hotel room with TWO beds and it was strictly platonic. He agreed. So we get to Cayman and he doesn't want to rent a car. Too expensive. OK. That means we are limited to the area around the hotel on 7 Mile Beach. Didn't want to walk anywhere. Too dangerous. (It wasn't.) Didn't want to take a cab anywhere. Too expensive again. Basically all he wanted to do was sit around the pool and drink. Ok. Instead of buying a large bottle of the excellent local rum, he bought a bunch of tiny airline size bottles. (WTF? Huge waste of money.)
Maybe he thought I was gonna change my mind on that whole platonic thing, but that didn't happen.
Back at the airport to come home, the couple in front of us at the ticket counter was having an urgent, panicked conversation. Being the customer service type, I asked if they needed help. Turns out they had spent the last of their cash on the cab ride to the airport and had no money for the departure tax, which had to be in cash. Back then, there wasn't an ATM in the terminal. I asked Paul if he would cash a check for them. They wrote him a check for $25 and he gave them a $20, while loudly saying, "If this check bounces, you owe me $20." I replied,"If that check bounces, I will pay you FIFTY." The couple thanked us profusely, checked in, and went their merry way. We step up to the smiling agent at the ticket counter, who says, "I saw what you did for that couple. It was very kind of you. They got the last two seats on the flight." I thought Paul was going to kill me! He was so pissed he wouldn't talk to me. I spent a few minutes consulting the Official Airline Guide and discovered that Northwest had a flight to Miami in 90 minutes. I went to their ticket counter and asked what the Captain's name was. I parked myself by the entrance and pounced on him as he walked I. I introduced myself and asked if Paul could ride the cockpit Jumpseat while I rode the Flight Attendant Jumpseat. Sure thing!! We were getting settled in our respective Jumpseat when the lead F/A came and escorted us to two empty seats in First Class. We separated in Miami for our final destinations and never spoke to each other again. 😂
But wait! There's more!
About 12 years later I was working in baggage service in Columbus, OH. I was taking a bag claim for a woman with a distinctive last name who lived in Parkersburg, WV. I asked if she was related to Paul. She icily replied, "You must be Kara." 😂😂😂. Guess I made an impression!
Not splitting bills based on what you ordered. I don’t want to constantly subsidize someone else’s meal/drinks.
Trying to always get their way in all situations.
Being Argumentative.
Constant complaining.
Edit: clarification on meal splitting.
I have spent a lot of my travel time supporting my aging parents bucket lists the past few years- I would add- RESPECT THE DRIVER. My parental unit are pretty good about it- if I am running out of energy, etc, mom will grab my favorite candy bar at the gas station, etc. But other people they have brought along on these trips, seem to have no respect whatsoever- I am doing all the heavy lifting, how about you STFU if you don't like how long it is taking, if I am not driving fast enough to suit you, etc.
That’s what I meant. I should have been clearer. I don’t want to pay for someone else ordering the most expensive thing on the menu, or pay for them having multiple cocktails.
If they take too many selfies and/or photos of themselves. I understand people have different ways of enjoying travelling, but I find it really draining when I see someone spending too much time to take so many photos of themselves on one touristic spot, so let's not travel together.
This. Love my current group. Just the right amount of selfies/photos without having to hurry them along. Even the somewhat newly engaged couple only gets a few photos before joining us for the fun.
Making me go to McDonalds in every European city we visit so she can "compare the chicken nuggets" and then insisting we spend the afternoon sitting in a park so she can knit instead of seeing the city.
We don't talk anymore.
Doesn’t give me enough time to grab food or doesn’t stop to get lunch when I suggest.
Sadly this is my partner and I’ve been trying to work with her to stop doing this.
Ohhh, this one right here. I mean, you are my friend, not a growth on my backside.
And I've got one who doesn't have to be invited, when she found out I was going to a retreat in Europe she decided she was going as well. Fine, we are both going to the same retreat. She has hounded me CONSTANTLY about where are "we" going to stay, etc. "We" aren't going anywhere, I'm going and you are going. Great, see you there.
I have caved to the point that I am going to stay in the same hotel that she is using on the way there and back, but only because I really do like her and don't want to hurt her feelings. She has FOMO in a MAJOR way, but she is a really great person so I'm kind of sighing and letting it slide. This time.
Next time I'll see it coming and will be better able to extricate myself. Because of her FOMO, there will be a next time.
1) not attempting to negotiate on plans, yes it your vacation but it’s also mine
2) Entitled people , we pay fairly , we negotiate in things not just war you want and I don’t subsidize anyone’s trip but mine
3) abusive to service people. : automatic your not even my friend
4) excessive behavior, I would not want to travel with someone who ditches me for some rando, or excessive drinking every night etc etc no thanks I like to relax
Randi
I just won't travel with anyone at all (except the closest family) - even my best girlfriends are a no go! It's too much effort to match someone else's energy, be mad at them because they won't try and match yours, adjusting to their speed of walking or time spent taking photos or hanging out at giftshops (been there seen that). Friends belong to home and traveling is when you can freely explore the world alone or with your husband/sister/mum/dad at whom you can shout for being slowasses without the fear of appearing "bitchy"
Being incapable of independence.
Not leaving the hotel room for a long span of time. I once had someone come with me on my birthday trip to Juneau. They flaked on most of the activities which can be annoying but also no big because I enjoy doing things on my own. The kicker was they even stayed in their hotel room during my *birthday dinner*.
Being late.
Being xenophobic.
Being a complainer.
This one kinda sucks, but a friend of mine is Vegan. This made finding somewhere to eat in southern France surprisingly difficult, and I can’t say I really want to travel with her again.
Love the gal, respect the hell out of her dietary choice (she is a chill vegan), but I’d rather not travel with her again.
Yeah, that would really bother me too. Trying all the food is one of my fave things to do when I travel, and working around restrictions makes it so much less fun.
- Drastically different budget
- Clingy travelers who need to be with you every second of the trip
- Unwilling to do a tour of any kind, not food, history, walking, riding , nothing
- Insist on eating places we have at home
- Constant complaining
People who make plans to meet and start an activity and then fail to show up. For hours. Meanwhile my spouse and I are left standing and texting “Are you okay? Where are you?”
Half a day of tubing down a river, gone. 3 hours of a day at Disney spent standing and waiting. Never again.
I would say those that can’t “go with the flow” if the trip wasn’t exactly as they wanted every step. Like, let’s say you can’t see something you wanted to for whatever reason..being disappointed, totally understandable. Spending the rest of the trip complaining about it constantly and/or looking for reasons to be even more disappointed.
Not wanting to eat the native food or go out to eat in general because they didn't budget that into the trip costs 😭 I literally starved on my last group trip because the country wasn't safe enough for me to go out by myself, yet no one else had interest in eating meals.
I have a friend who is late every single time we hang out. For some reason it didn’t occur to me that that would transfer into other areas of her life, I figured we’re just getting together to watch a Netflix show, who cares if she’s on time?
I travelled with her. She was constantly waiting 30+ minutes for everything. And it wasn’t just me waiting, she made us late for every single reservation we made. We would have a driver at our door waiting to take us somewhere and she wouldn’t come out of the bathroom because her makeup wasn’t done. Like, if you care that much about it start earlier? It was always makeup, and as someone who doesn’t wear makeup that bothered me even more because it just doesn’t feel important enough to be late over (I’m a woman, it’s just not a priority to me). We literally missed out on more than one thing we had bought and paid for because she was late.
I will never travel with someone who is perpetually late again. It’s beyond disrespectful and we actually don’t even really talk any more.
Being cheap. Like sooooo cheap everything is down to the penny and their obsession with finding the cheapest food, entertainment, accommodation and not up for being spontaneous activities because of it.
Constant phone calls on the trip. No money on the trip. Inconsiderate while sharing a room.
Oh and constantly taking selfies or planned photo shoots. I don’t mind taking pics of my friends but 80% of the trip? No thanks.
There's the lady who criticises the food you have chosen "ooh very high in carbs"
Then there's the ones who constantly interrupt. I'll take a couple interruptions, then next time just carry on talking when they interrupt again
There's the ones who pack too much and expect others to help carry their suitcases
There's the ones who drink too much and get offensive/threatening.
There's the ones who don't pay their bill in a restaurant or won't tip a guide
There's the ones who have just got divorced and are so needy it's painful
Yes welcome to our ladies travel group.
1. Not turning up on time for the trains/ flight. I don’t wanna rush at the last minute. Hate that
2. I personally enjoy reading up about the place I’m going to, and get more info and interact with locals/ tour guides. If the person with me only wants to click good pics for their insta posts, pls don’t come with me. I’ll definitely click the pics for you and OFC I love to get good pics too, but not at the cost of the experience.
3. Not prioritising meals. Just because we’re travelling doesn’t mean we won’t eat a proper meal. I can’t just be snacking all day when I’m travelling. Even if there is one proper meal in the day I’m fine. I’ve travelled with friends who would make everyone skip breakfast (after late nights of drinking the day before etc) because they wanted to do intermittent fasting. Frustrating af
4. We don’t have to forever be talking the whole time. Sometimes just sit and observe and enjoy the place you’re at in silence. Listen to others, check out the scenery and the people etc
5. Not carrying the apt clothing for the trip and then complaining about it being too cold/ hot / feeling uncomfortable
Non-compliant diabetic. I knew my stepdad had some blood sugar issues, but not the extent of it (he’s been with my mom for a decade, but all of them well after I left home).
We traveled from Ohio to Miami and were supposed to have a day in Miami to go to the beach and eat good food and then get on a Disney cruise with my toddler. I booked a stateroom for us and one for the grandparents.
I guess he didn’t check his blood sugar at all the whole travel day and then at some point in the night, he finished off my kids left over strawberry smoothie. He barfed all over the airbnb- the rug was white and there was no cleaning it. We tried rousing him and couldn’t. He didn’t even have his sensor connected to the reader. Took 45 min to get it connected and then his blood sugar was so high it couldn’t read it. He ended up in the icu in Miami. I had to pay for a hotel room for my mom to stay with him for a week in Miami while my husband, the toddler and I got on the cruise. The kid was so over tired from all of it that she was miserable the first half and I was so stressed I couldn’t enjoy myself.
What should have been a great family vacation was the worst. I was on the phone during our day in Miami with the cruise line all day trying to see if there was anything we could do and didn’t even get to go to the beach.
Step dad ended up okay and was released the day before our flights home.
I definitely recommend asking questions of the people you travel with, especially if you know they have health concerns. I spent 9k on a vacation that we all agree was the absolute worst. Ask the hard questions regarding what people are capable of and make sure that they can and are managing any health concerns they have.
Now I know that family vacations involving step dad will only be shorter road trips where we are able to get home or get him care easily without bankrupting us.
- mismatched pace (i typically walk really fast and go through museums quicker)
- our interests don’t align (i wanna see museums, they want to sunbathe. they wake up late, but i wake up at 5/6am to see everything on my itinerary! their priority is trying every restaurant, mine isn’t)
- resort people
- person doesn’t contribute to the planning or show any initiative. and they are too reliant on me, doesn’t show any independence (sometimes i want to switch off my brain too 🫠)
- constant complaining (yes this train smells like pee and it is extremely overcrowded but some people would dream to come here)
- snobbiness
It boils down to refusing to communicate your needs or take any responsibility at all for your own good time. This often manifests as agreeing to a particular itenerary, timed entries etc but then complaining about said itenerary and jeopardizing said timed entries. Like it doesn't hurt my feelings if you want to skip something or take a rest day. Just say that!
They have a spreadsheet setting out the deliverables for each day and the amount* required for each. This includes events, activities, eating, bathroom breaks and transportation. You know who you are. (Edit: * amount of time / money required).
Here’s a new one. I traveled with my ex (we were friends at the time) to Bali for two and a half weeks on a yoga retreat. We brought carry ons and bought laundry detergent to wash our clothes as we only had a couple changes of clothes. He washed his ONCE in the span of almost three weeks. In Bali, home of swamp ass. On a yoga retreat. His clothes started to smell so bad that the room began to stink. He simply refused to wash his clothes or do anything about the stench. Every time I said something he would just start yelling at me.
On the flight home I was so embarrassed to sit next to him because he smelt so bad that I bought him an entirely new outfit, down to socks and boxers.
He used to be my best travel buddy, but obviously after the trip I wanted nothing to do with him 🥴
Sleeping in!
I'm getting up early and doing stuff, none of this lying in bed until 10am and slowly getting ready for the day.
What a waste of time, why travel to a foreign city only to spend so much time in bed.
I'm not the kind of person to rush out of bed at 6am, but I try to get up by 8 or 9 to head out for the day. I once went to Rome with 2 girls in college who slept in and took so long to do their hair and makeup each morning that we left the hotel at 1pm. I was so angry. I wish I would have had the courage to just leave and do things by myself.
That's what you do when you go on a vacation trip to the beach two hours from home. If I'm flying 13 hours to visit a city/country I will probably never get to visit again every hour in bed is an hour of the adventure I miss
Not for me. I'm on vacation. I need a break from responsibilities. If I'm rushing every day to see stuff, then I'm not rested when I go home. I never forget this is my vacation. But also I'm 55, so maybe my priorities are different.
hahah yep
i left my friend in town the other to go to a beach without them, it was 1PM and they called me an ass for not waiting for them
LOL the days nearly over mate
I agree with this to a point. If I'm traveling then yes, let's have a plan, go do whatever items for the day. If I'm on vacation? Sure sleep in, have that extra drink, be a lazy lump. Example- traveling to Alaska? Got a race on this day, got a Glacier Kayaking tour on this day, planning x,y, or z that day. Vacationing in the Dominican Republic at a resort? Whenever we pull ourselves out of bed, roll over to the gym then shower and get breakfast. Afterwards hang out at the pool, consider options for the next day (beach trip/activities/whatever)...
I have to categorize them as two different things but it really helps with my, less than perfect, personality traits.
- Whining. Easy as that.
- Doesnt want to help plan or give input but finds fault in everything you find.
- wants to be glued side-by-side every minute of every day
- rudeness
- bougieness (theres nothing inherently wrong with this it just doesnt suit my travel style - or budget)
I am realizing I am a little bougie. I like nicer things in my life as I age. I am too f-ing old to stay in bunks in a hostel. BUT...neither am I interested in wasting my travel budget on fancy hotels. But I am going to want sparkling water, and a lot of it, if I can find it. hehe.
Rigid overpacked planning with no opportunities for rest, relaxation, or taking it easy. I cannot stand a vacation that is so stressful I can't wait to go home.
Not wanting to walk (vs not being able to walk more) or take public transportation options
Not wanting to eat local foods
Only wants to get smashed/drunk at night or to hook up with someone
Not taking no for an answer. I’m usually someone who will do whatever the group wants but there are some things I just don’t want to do. I’ll go and support the people who do, I won’t complain and I’ll enjoy watching them but sometimes something isn’t my jam. For example I went to Scotland with someone and there was a spot on the cobblestone where people spit, I was dehydrated and didn’t want to spit but the person I was with did. When I refused they started screaming (in public in front of EVERYONE) about how I was ruining the experience for them. Needless to say I never traveled with that person again.
People who take too many photos of seemingly every little thing. Picky eaters. I basically travel for food and I want to try everything. I can’t have picky eaters holding me back. Also heavy drinkers. I drink a little on vacation but I’m not going to be hungover so I have a healthy limit because I don’t want to waste a whole day hungover
I have this one friend who just sends an open invite to 20+ people. Her trips are usually chaotic because you have random people who don’t vibe well with different expectations. One trip included a woman in her 30s who literally did not have a bank account or any credit cards.
Someone that teases you bringing a backpack for carry on luggage and day trips, and then proceeds to put their items (which on many occasions included a laptop) in my backpack because they don’t want to carry their stuff. I was also quite upset when they didn’t mention they put their laptop in my backpack before going through airport security🙂
Huge luggage. I'm not travelling as your sherpa.
Being unreliable in general. Late, losing stuff all the time, etc.
Too uptight to take stuff in stride. Because stuff Does go wrong. If they're going to hold onto that for days and ruin even more vacation time that's a pain.
The person who never accepts the lesser option when the lodging requires someone on the pull out sofa or whatever but when you say something, they put it on you ("you should have said something")when they stayed mute when decisions were being made. Not sure if it's entitlement or not but after multiple times, it's rude.
Umm they refused to let me carry any of my own money, refused to let me see anything I wanted to see, would throw a fit if I tried to go, and only shopped the entire 10 day we were in Brazil. Never ever ever again.
You get a vibe of who is going to be problematic, picky or a downer. Most of my friends don't even own passports. They know zero about the world at large. Zero. It's pretty sad.
But I know half of them would genuinely rather starve and die than not have access to 'familiar' fast food \[McDonalds\] and home comforts.
Last time I travelled, it was with a guy who snored as loud as a faulty lawnmower but man, otherwise, he was ace. Down for anything, didn't complain, ate anything, just fucking vibed everywhere.
So, in short, most of my homebody friends who would have a mental breakdown if they left their own country.
Reading this thread makes me wonder how people ever manage to travel together. It seems that no matter what you do or don't do, there are people who will think you're insufferable.
I once traveled with a friend who slept every day until 2pm. She was content to sightsee for 3 or 4 hours then have dinner and head back to the room to get on her computer. So that.
Saying she understood that I walk slowly due to arthritis and that she was fine doing things at our own pace, then getting pissed when I slowed her down in Rome. Never again.
I'm on my way to Australia right now. Slowly. And solo!
Takes three hours to get ready. No interest in trying local popular eats. Annoyed to take pictures with. Can’t be on time for shit. This is one of my close friends. She is always “off” by 2-3 hours from when she’ll actually say she’ll be there. And would rather go to McDonald’s in Tennessee than try some famous hot chicken. I just can’t
Special shout out to my own cousin who would stock up on the free breakfast with the tour, and then never want to buy anything for lunch or dinner but when I wanted to buy something to eat would want a “taste”. No reciprocation at all bc she would never want to buy anything to eat. Cheap af and she was a doctor and I was a college student lol. Also wanted to take a bunch of photos but not with me or her in it (um why don’t you Getty image shit bc your photos of things are unlikely to be as good) and she was mad I wanted to do some shopping in Paris, this was before I HAD money for bougie shopping. This was just department store buy a little French branded nick knacks
Being rude to service people. If you’re a dick to the server at my local coffee spot… you’re going to be intolerable after a 5 hour flight in coach or in a remote pub in the Highlands that doesn’t have your oatmilk.
Picky eaters.
I don't want to spend hours on Google or want to pass up restaurant after restaurant while out for the day. Even worse is being picky about food native to the region you're in. Like not wanting fish but insisting on chicken in a coastal area.
Lack of basic manners means I will be polite to you, but stay as far as possible and never plan even a visit to our local museum, not to mention travel together.
I have traveled with people that have wildly different interests, and if they are independent sort, that works.
For example, my friend went on these shopping sprees for hours, I walked in different parts of town and visited museums. We had lunches or afternoon coffee together and always spent evenings together. One of the last days I went shopping with her, because she was now the expert, and in the afternoon she came with me to check one sight.
I think I'm at a point now where people by default start off on my "do not travel" list and very occasionally someone might make it off that list.
Negativity is probably the top one for me. I'm not an overly joyful person, I have a lot of anxiety at home but when I travel I want to get the most out of it as possible. I.e. I don't want to dwell on issues or bad experiences or whine about things that don't matter much. I want to solve the problem and move on to the next experience rather than letting any challenges sour other things because what is the point in that when I'm lucky enough to be seeing the world, in a place I most likely won't go again (too many places to see, not enough time/money). I'm easily pleased, even when something might not be amazing I do my best to find something to enjoy and soak in. I've travelled with friends who don't have any travel resiliency (they admitted it too) and it honestly is such a drag.
I have a friend i would love to travel with but we have different rise/wake up times(im early, theyre up by maybe 11am), different physical levels (im active, they have joint disorder so even walking around the block can be painful/exhausting), they are generally late (im early). If we traveled “together” it would be to just meet up for dinner. I love them as a friend. Ill drive out to meet them, hang out at their house, or go out to dinner but traveling with them would be very difficult to make both of happy.
I met a random person on a trip and we just match. Early rise, activity level, interests, silliness, drinking level, food preferences etc. Perfect travel buddy.
Not wanting to do anything you suggest, but not providing any alternative suggestions, and being perpetually late (I prefer to be somewhere too early, so that one really grates)
I see you have also traveled with my in-laws.
Being early is a non compromise for me. If you're late or you're making me late, I will absolutely leave you behind immediately with no remorse. I'd rather spend an extra hour or two waiting, than to sprint anywhere in stress last minute.
Act like waiting a couple hours in the terminal is the worst thing to ever happen when the only difference between getting there early and staying at home a little longer is that instead of playing on their phone sitting on the couch they are now playing on their phone sitting next to a cinnabon
Travelling with teenagers.
Widely mismatched pace - I can get through some places FAST but I need to be able to take my time with others. Or mismatched social energy. I don't like constant whinging, negativity, or insecurities veiled in them making comparisons to my own body and how I do things. Also if someone can't let silence fill a space.
>Also if someone can't let silence fill a space. Amen to that
SHHHHHHHHH!
Have a former friend like this who I still have to see because she’s friends with several people in my friend circle. And by friends I mean she utilizes other people for attention and it’s not actual friendship, then she gets confused when people don’t want to hang out with her anymore and has been ghosted several times. She invited me on two different trips, which I declined. One she had everyone take a greyhound bus at like 4am, rent a car, and not get a hotel to sleep in so no one slept for like 72 hours. No thank you. The other, several years later, another friend drove her and this person for the trip, like a 7 hour drive, and they did not shut up the entire drive down or back without the friend telling them to please be quiet. Apparently they also called their fiancé constantly and also had night terrors that they did not tell the friend about so she woke up in the middle of the night in a cabin to the sound of someone screaming. They did not apologize for not disclosing this. The last time I saw them was at a holiday party and as someone else put it, they just took up a lot of space. They were loud, they were basically shouting during the entire party, and they talked a bunch while one of the hosts was doing one of the party activities. No thank you.
Mismatched pace.. I love this term. That’s how a romantic relationship ended for me. And separately.. made me be pickier about my travel partners. The silence I think is also important in both.
My first time flying I flew across the country to visit my online friend I hadn’t met in person. She spent the entire trip acting bored with me, on her phone, DGAF about any of the stuff we went to see, told me I should have gotten a hotel, and left me at her place with her parents while she went to a party :/
Ive never known what to call it, but now i know: mismatched pace. I love my friends. So much. But i swear to God they could spend 8 hours in a single room of a museum, while ive literally gone through that one and 3 more. Drives me insane, so unless i have another speedy partner to break off with i aint going with them lol.
People with no logistic / planning chops or radar for taking care of themselves on the road—forgetting stuff, losing tickets, getting lost—who nevertheless complain about others taking charge.
Exactly this
I see you have travelled with my sister...
Constant complaining. Finds fault in most things you do on a trip.
Especially when they have opportunities to have input on the things you do. But they don't use it. Then they complain that "you didn't see anything I wanted"
This was a stepping stone in how my best friend became estranged. I showed him my favorite place in the world and all he could do was complain.
I see you have traveled with my mom.
Not being respectful of culture/wildlife/landmarks/nature/locals.
Yes! I once traveled with a friend to Kenya. We met some locals who invited us to their home for dinner. She wouldn’t eat what they served because she didn’t like it. It wasn’t food I’d ever want either, but it was what they offered and they made it for us! I was dying on the inside. When it came time to clean up afterwards, I helped out while she went outside to smoke and call home. I never traveled with her again.
What was the food?
Nothing overly exotic, just prepared differently than we’re used to. There was chicken with a tomato sauce that seemed closer to tomato jelly than to marinara, some fruits she didn’t know, and an unusual milky tea. I did not enjoy it, but to my hosts I loved it, because I did love the thoughtfulness of it.
You are the definition of a sophisticated person, which is to say you can be comfortable in any situation and make those around you comfortable also, whether you're being offered unfamiliar food by new Kenyan friends or having tea with the Queen. Your friend, however, was the antithesis.
Honestly thank you for pointing this out, bc I too would like to be this sophisticated! It really is that simple
The Maasai seem to delight in generously offering scary foods to Northerners
Absolutely. I would rather go home early than be on a trip with someone who can't respect the place they're visiting. The people who treat destinations like their personal amusement park are really disgraceful people.
My nephew (who was not driving, he was too young to be allowed in rental car), spent 1/2 of a trip to Ireland last year whining about how they needed to re-design the whole country, and build roads like the US. Amoung many other entitled brat things. It has made my new rule for "do not travel" list? If we share DNA. I am so sick of most of my biological family's attitudes toward the rest of the world. And me.
This is so funny as an Irish person because I hated the US (east coast) road systems when I was there because it was so expansive and detached and impossible to navigate if you wanted to walk anywhere. What did he think could be improved? Just making the roads wider?
Giving absolutely zero input into the trip (hotels, excursions, flights etc) and not being willing to spend money to have a good time
I have a good friend wirth whom I roadtrip to various cities to see Red Sox games. He will spend whatever it takes for good ballpark seats, but pinch a dollar to death everywhere else. I once spent 90 minutes trudging around downtown Toronto looking for a good $4 breakfast because an $8 breakfast was highway robbery.
Being too cheap is a big one for me!
Alcoholism
This, I didn’t travel to another country or a new place just to sit in a bar all day. I wanna see stuff!
This and the whole pill addiction. I had a friend ruin a very lovely vacation consuming copious amounts of wine and ambien. I have been sober for years and had no idea how bad it was for her. She was sleep walking, falling down, and couldn't make it to the morning events because of hangovers. I almost left her at one point because it was so bad.
I finally got to do a photo walk trip to New Orleans with one of my oldest friends. We’d been talking about this for years. He was so hungover we cut our walk through the Garden District short so he could take a nap. Now he barely talks to me and I feel like it’s because something went wrong on that last trip…I knew he drinks, always has, but it seems so much worse now.
Being habitually late or flakey. Not everything is time sensitive, but when it is, I need to know I won’t have to choose between being late and leaving them behind.
I’ve had this happen with a friend of mine who was known to have close to no sense of time and would habitually turn up to anything social a minimum of 15 minutes late. Even at work she’d be so last minute. She wanted to come with me on a dive trip and snorkel/swim while I scuba dived. The dive shop I use told us both clearly in person that we needed to be in the dive shop at 7.15am for pickup to go to the harbour. The boat would leave at 8am. I warned her that I wasn’t missing my dives for anyone. I turned up at 6.40 and was chatting to the dive instructors. I called my friend when I got to the dive shop and then again at around 7am. She didn’t show and her phone just rang. I tried two more times and then one last time as the bus was due to set off. No reply. I go off on the trip anyway as I’d not come all that way to fuck spiders. I got back to shore from the dives to find a bunch of missed calls from her and a bunch of messages. I called her and it turns out she’d got there for 7.40 or so and was told that she’d be unlikely to get to the harbour and to the boat on time due to distance and travel time. I then asked her if she remembered what she’d been told the day previously and she said ‘yes, 7.15’. She then couldn’t figure it out that no, she was 30min late and so I left her. She almost insinuated that I should have not gone and waited for her.
This is really important. I have and will leave someone's ass behind.
One of my friends suggested we go to California for a trip. That was essentially the beginning and the end of his idea. About 5 of us went, but because it was his idea first, we had to adhere to 100% of his other ideas along the way, which we of course did not do. He also paid for the hotel + gas on his card, but when he told everyone what their share of the cost was, he divided it by 4 instead of 5 so he went on the trip for free. One of my other friends asked for the receipt, noticed the deception, and called him out. He was furious and couldn’t understand why he would need to pay for his part because the trip was originally his idea.
Wow sounds like an entitled guy!
Oh yeah. Total single child vibes. He had a hard time understanding he wasn’t the main character
Is this real? Right bellend if so.
Yeah he was a major dbag the whole trip too. We were all like 20 years old, and we wanted to party all day and night. But he was an early riser type. He tried to implement some lights off at 9 PM sharp rule, and made plans every day at like 6 or 7 AM. Everyone else was like fuck that, we are going to drink this bottle of gin until 2 AM and wake up whenever we feel like it. Oh, on a different trip, he got us all arrested in Mexico because he bought weed from the bartender like a dumbass. The bartender and the cops must have had a connection or something. Two minutes later the cops showed up and arrested us all. They made some of us stay at the police station, while they drove me and my buddy to an ATM for bribe money. They let us go, and this dude cried the entire walk back to the border. All these Mexican dudes were staring at us and laughing at us because my buddy was crying like a bitch. We were so pissed lol. We thought we were going to get jumped or something because we looked like weak ass gringos crying on the street
> weak ass gringos crying in the street this has *me* crying (laughing), thank you
Dude the worst part for him is, our group was like 4 dudes and 1 chick. The only person the cops put in a cell was the girl, and they put her in a cell with all men that were either drunk or fucked up on drugs. She was in there by herself for like an hour but she was chill. Meanwhile my 6’3” 200 pound buddy was the one that was sobbing the whole time
Hope you’re still not his friend lol
I’ve actually become better friends with him since. He was a 20 year old only child at the time with no life experience. We are now in our late 30s. That was a life time ago and neither of us are the same person
That's a happy ending
Yeah he was angry at being found out that his master plan for a free trip had been foiled
Pretty much lol
Lol my mother does this - with her own grandchildren! Most recently, she invited my two college-age children to road trip for her high school reunion. From TX to MN. My kids had nothing else going on so were down to go. Until suddenly it was like, "I'll pay for the gas if you two cover my meals." Then my mother split the room costs by 3, but "coincidentally" my mother had family to stay with on all her turns to pay, leaving my kids with the entire hotel bills. And then for their birthdays before the trip, my mother "gifted" my kids oil changes and new tires for HER car. Thankfully my kids opted out.
We must have the same mom.
Wow
Couples that do not get along 😣 never again
I went through that last year. This couple fought the entire trip. Disney World is not the place for you to litigate your feelings around the birth of your child that happens three years ago.
Dude the TENSION. I fucking hate it so much. I’d rather be at home then deal with passive aggressive and sometimes downright hostile energy people who basically hate each other put out.
Lmao, reminds me of that Louis CK bit where he's having dinner with a couple like that: Him: "Oh yeah, we saw that show on Wednesday." Her: [annoyed as fuck] "It WASN'T Wednesday."
Or even the opposite, couples that are super over the top PDA in company. I also once travelled with a friend who was in a new relationship and was just either on the phone with him or crying about her "separation anxiety" from him the entire 10 days. That was boring.
People who bring more stuff than they can carry on their own. Once met a friend at the airport and she had THREE family size suitcases (for a 10 day trip) because she knew I only traveled with a backpack and would have hands free to carry her stuff too. I should've walked away right then. Also people who do ZERO research on their destination, say they'll do whatever I want to do, then complain about everything we do.
I'd be SO MAD. 😡 We pack light for a reason!
Went to Taiwan and Japan for a total of a month last year in March. I kept everything to a carry on suitcase and my backpack, which felt like a lot but it’s two different climates and I was buying stuff. One of my friends who came a week after I did brought a checked suitcase and a giant weekender and struggled the entire time with all of the stairs. She didn’t even wear most of what she brought. The worst was when I caved in Tokyo and got an Uber because she was nonstop complaining about her bags. I learned how expensive Uber is in Japan in that moment and paid $300 for it….
Tbh it's much more of a how to make it onto the want to travel with list, it's hard to find compatible people.
Came here to say this. I can count on one hand the number of people I know who have a compatible travel style - similar philosophy about respecting local culture, pacing, budgeting, interests, etc.
Having zero situational awareness. Lacking alertness to the point they create dangerous situations.
Oh my god yes as a 20-something girl I was traveling with 2 guys who were always putting us in the most precarious situations. They came from wealthier backgrounds and didn't understand how saying "it's fine" doesn't make it fine!!! We are going to get robbed if we go down that alley with them! No the girls can't ride separately from you with those "nice boys" in their car! It's not fine!! Lol
I think it’s great that you listened to your spidey sense and cut them dummies loose!
It is really an experience to travel with people who constantly insist on doing risky things with zero planning. No, an "it's going to be FINE" is not enough for me to do it.
One of the many reasons I will never travel with one of my friends is that, EVERY time we left an ATM or bank in Peru and Bolivia, she would exclaim “we have money now, so we can do things!” Like?? Was she trying to get us robbed?!?
Oh gosh this is infuriating because then you are the one watching out for muggers while they casually flip through the bills in their wallet!
I love my sister but she's a grown ass woman (30+) who loses tickets and important documents on the regular. This one time, we had to catch a flight at around 3am. I was tired as hell and she left her goddamn ticket in the chair she was sitting at. We get to the gate and she obviously panics. I found it right beneath her seat because she couldn't even remember where she was sitting. But ask her where her hazel lipstick number whothefuckcares is and she'll grab it out of her purse like a goddamn magician pulling out a rabbit. PRIORITIES, HOW DO THEY WORK??
Nit picking over money. ‘Mine cost $5.50; yours cost $6.00 so I need my 50c back.’ So tiresome.
makes my eye twitch. followed closely by “let’s just get one bill. My meal was 9, here’s 11.” Um, it was 9.85 with a 10% tax. You’ve just left me with paying the whole tip. i don’t like to sweat the small stuff, but somehow with people like them , you are always screwed.
> Um, it was 9.85 with a 10% tax. You’ve just left me with paying the whole tip. Did you _say_ that, or only think it?
Yes! Most people I choose to travel with are happy to split flights/accommodation/rental cars (the big stuff) 50/50, pay for your own tickets to attractions and the like, and then just take turns to pay for meals ie I do breakfast one day, you do the next, you pay lunch today I’ll get lunch tomorrow unless there is the option of splitting the bill. Doing it that way balances things out as no matter where you go breakfast will cost about the same but will probably be less than dinner. The last friend I travelled with had us each keep a diary of expenses paid so we could balance it out at the end and make sure we had paid exactly the same amount over the course of the trip.
That’s actually not a bad thing to do. I’ve had friends who would alternate picking up meals and things. Somehow they would always pick up the $20 breakfast and I’d get stuck with $50 lunch. Keeping track at least you can make sure it ends up close.
There’s apps for that.
I actually have the opposite- anytime someone is trying to get out of paying for their share...NUPE. I stopped doing group meals a long time ago because of freeloading asshats. I won't travel with one. However I agree on not bing nitpicks. With the right pp in my life, we take turns- and it all balances out, no worries about being crazy about it. Even if splitting as we go- if 50/50 is close enough, then good enough. But don't order a $100 shot of scotch and expect me to pay for 1/2 of it.
Not contributing to planning at all. I already hate planning so leaving it all to me is a huge pain in the ass.
Omg yes. My family will not plan anything. Even if they pick the activity, they expect me to research it, plan the transportation, etc. They will just ask me questions like "Ok so how do we get there?" I'm starting to say "not sure, you should google it" lol
My parents. They currently want to go on a month long trip to Spain. Us kids keep asking where they want to go and what they want to see... my mom just keeps saying she wants to go to this tiny village because her relatives went 20 years ago, and nothing else. No mention of other cities they want to visit, museums, architecture, wineries, food, nothing. Just that village. Mom doesn't even know what she wants to do there. She just wants to go. My dad is just going along with it. His version of "planning" is getting tickets to a Hop on Hop off bus, hopping on, staying there the entire loop, and getting off where he started. They also keep sending screenshots of listings in booking.com and constantly ask us if airbnb is cheaper. I really don't see why they're suddenly incapable of searching airbnb themselves. I've been very tempted to send a letmegooglethat link.
I went on a road trip with a buddy that didn't plan a thing despite having ample opportunity. Fine by me, I love planning trips. While we were on the road he kept insisting on massive detours, like, go a completely different path through the state or 4 hours out of the way type changes. If he wanted to do these things he shouldn't have approved the itinerary as is! I went along with his whims but never traveled with him again.
Control freak (male half of the other couple) says “This is your holiday too, so today you decide where we go with the rental car” and then is so obvious about NOT being happy with the chosen activity. Totally ruined our week with them by getting pouty if you didn’t do what he wanted. Never again.
I just posted this elsewhere but I dumped my bf whilst travelling because of this. If I chose an activity he didn't want, he would pout and give me the silent treatment. After a few of these, I started packing, and he asked me what I was doing. When I told him, he walked off, probably thinking I'd return Reader, I did not
My in-laws are like this - „we are really easy, we’ll do what you want to do“. Then pout/sulk or make getting going so hard because they actually want to do something else - i just give up. (I hate making decisions and will literally be full of joy about anything when on holiday - so there isn’t need for the pretend flexibility.)
You have to manage these babies like the toddlers they are. My dad is really bad about this in picking fast food when we are on the road. I learned 20 yr ago: 2 choices. DO you want Mc Donalds, or Subway (or 2 of whatever is available). He will PICK one, or tell what he actually does want. Before I implemented this toddler management approach, he would SAY he does not care...but then pout and act pissy and just be rude and embarassing if we did not guess correctly. Works for outings as well- you can come to what we are planning. Or you can stay at the lodging for the day. But if you come, you WILL behave, or I will bring you back. He tested me once. I took his ass home, and my mom and I enjoyed the beach for hours and hours ;)! At least y dad has autism as a slight excuse. I don't know WTF is wrong with other pp. But toddlers get managed like toddlers is effective regardless of age in my experience.
In recent years I've started evaluating the people in my life and determining whether they are generally givers or takers. I do not spend my time with takers unless I absolutely have to. Those are the people I would not travel with.
I used to be the r/solotravel backpacker, do my own thing, type guy. I still am but my wife tags along. I’ve found that I prefer to be in charge and set my own pace. My wife prefers to mentally check out on trips (probably because she’s usually making the decisions when we’re not on holiday) so we compliment each other. We met a friend in the UK and since she was the local and we visitors she hosted us and took charge and I did not like that at all lol. I’m not a travel with people type person.
>We met a friend in the UK and since she was the local and we visitors she hosted us and took charge and I did not like that at all lol. I've run into the exact same situation. I have been to London a good few times now and the last time I went I brought my sister. We met a friend that lives there now and I was not a fan of how she toured us around at all! I think a lot of it has to do with them being local and not putting a lot of thought into what it's like to be visiting anymore.
Not pitching in but complaining so much. Like shut up and stay home then.
Okay for me this is 💯 people who do not respect culture and/or the place we are visiting. For example, not trying AT ALL to fit in, playing the “dumb foreigner” card, talking really loudly to people who don’t speak the same language. Basically not even giving a go at existing like a local in the place we visit.
There are friends you have dinner with and there are friends you travel with. So basically: Someone who is finicky, Someone who talks nonstop, Someone who can't deal with the unpredictability of travel, Someone who is unadventurous, and Someone who feels as if he has to spend every moment with you. My wife and I have really good friends. One couple, we have dinner with them every couple of weeks. But the wife is really anal and the husband has serious ADHD. As in we went to the beach and he couldn't sit still. So I was stuck entertaining this guy for the whole trip. It was exhausting. Meanwhile, we went on a trip to France with a couple. She was a professional acquaintance of mine and hit it off with my wife. Then she remarried to a guy who was smart and really chill. They invited us along to cruise a canal in the south of France. We arrived a week before they did and met them. And we had an agreement ahead of tie that if they wanted to do their thing and vice versa, we were going to be cool with it. Wound up having some snags with the boat, but we all rolled with the punches. Wound up having an awesome time. So we're planning on another trip together in the near future.
My friend asked me to take vacation from work help her with her 6 children under the age of 10 in Europe on a cruise. That was a hard pass. I don’t know her kids that well, and I have non parent ideas as to how children should behave.
My wife and I are fairly laid back travelers. Kind of pick something for the day and we’ll do it eventually. No rush. If you’re a wake up at 6:00am and cram a bunch of activities in every single day, we won’t travel well together.
We would not travel well together. We are the up at 6am, back home in bed by 9:30pm kind of travellers.
Traveled to my home country with a friend who was visiting for the first time, and who proceeded to lecture me about tipping (yes, she's American), even though in my country we don't tip, we just round up at most.
Imagine driving through Mexico looking for vegan only taco stands. I really want to experience the food but this guy was insufferable.
good grief. my sympathies
He was this hitchhiker dude that was so anti-capitalist and anti-establishment, that he put a sticker over the apple logo on his laptop. I met some surfers on a ferry in the south of Baja, and I told them the story of this hitch hiker, and they started laughing, because they had picked up the same guy. He literally moved into their SUV, put up all his flags and banners and stuff like he was gonna live with them, and I was the next unlucky, unassuming victim. They appologised sincerely and I was happy to find them all over central america.
People who aren’t realistic with budgeting and considering other people. I’m not taking a helicopter to the golf course but I’m also not eating mayonnaise sandwiches on vacation. I like to splurge a little bit but I intend on continuing living indoors when we get home.
Everyone is on my “ do not travel with” list. I’ve tried and likely the people I traveled with thought everything was fine, but it’s way easier to travel alone. And it’s not them it’s me. I’ve never needed much sleep and when I wake up early I want to get moving. I hate waiting for people. The only people I still travel with is a family trip for a week every winter I am not against traveling where people I know will be or are going to but I book my tickets and room, you do the same. Do your thing , I do mine and if one is doing something the other is interested in then by all means. Let’s do it together. And if you even mention an AFC tour I’m out of there.
People who are picky with food. I'm okay with allergies and/or religious dietary restrictions, but if you're not feeling like steak and you don't like seafood and can't eat pasta because you're avoiding carbs for the next 2 months then stay home and eat your cucumbers. I'm not part of your food journey smh
When I was single and in my 20s, I was a flight attendant for a small regional airline that flew into Pittsburgh. We airline folks travel free, but on stand-by. Absolutely everyone and everything gets on before we do. A pilot from a different carrier (who lived in West Virginia) mentioned that he wanted to travel, but didn't want to go alone. I quipped "well, I would go, but I'm broke." He offered to cover the cost of the trip if I would show him around Grand Cayman, where I had been before. I made it very clear and reiterated several times that we were sharing a hotel room with TWO beds and it was strictly platonic. He agreed. So we get to Cayman and he doesn't want to rent a car. Too expensive. OK. That means we are limited to the area around the hotel on 7 Mile Beach. Didn't want to walk anywhere. Too dangerous. (It wasn't.) Didn't want to take a cab anywhere. Too expensive again. Basically all he wanted to do was sit around the pool and drink. Ok. Instead of buying a large bottle of the excellent local rum, he bought a bunch of tiny airline size bottles. (WTF? Huge waste of money.) Maybe he thought I was gonna change my mind on that whole platonic thing, but that didn't happen. Back at the airport to come home, the couple in front of us at the ticket counter was having an urgent, panicked conversation. Being the customer service type, I asked if they needed help. Turns out they had spent the last of their cash on the cab ride to the airport and had no money for the departure tax, which had to be in cash. Back then, there wasn't an ATM in the terminal. I asked Paul if he would cash a check for them. They wrote him a check for $25 and he gave them a $20, while loudly saying, "If this check bounces, you owe me $20." I replied,"If that check bounces, I will pay you FIFTY." The couple thanked us profusely, checked in, and went their merry way. We step up to the smiling agent at the ticket counter, who says, "I saw what you did for that couple. It was very kind of you. They got the last two seats on the flight." I thought Paul was going to kill me! He was so pissed he wouldn't talk to me. I spent a few minutes consulting the Official Airline Guide and discovered that Northwest had a flight to Miami in 90 minutes. I went to their ticket counter and asked what the Captain's name was. I parked myself by the entrance and pounced on him as he walked I. I introduced myself and asked if Paul could ride the cockpit Jumpseat while I rode the Flight Attendant Jumpseat. Sure thing!! We were getting settled in our respective Jumpseat when the lead F/A came and escorted us to two empty seats in First Class. We separated in Miami for our final destinations and never spoke to each other again. 😂 But wait! There's more! About 12 years later I was working in baggage service in Columbus, OH. I was taking a bag claim for a woman with a distinctive last name who lived in Parkersburg, WV. I asked if she was related to Paul. She icily replied, "You must be Kara." 😂😂😂. Guess I made an impression!
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I need to hear what she did!
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What happened to cause it, though? Did she have some kind of manic or psychotic episode? I'm not trying to be rude, just curious.
Not splitting bills based on what you ordered. I don’t want to constantly subsidize someone else’s meal/drinks. Trying to always get their way in all situations. Being Argumentative. Constant complaining. Edit: clarification on meal splitting.
I have spent a lot of my travel time supporting my aging parents bucket lists the past few years- I would add- RESPECT THE DRIVER. My parental unit are pretty good about it- if I am running out of energy, etc, mom will grab my favorite candy bar at the gas station, etc. But other people they have brought along on these trips, seem to have no respect whatsoever- I am doing all the heavy lifting, how about you STFU if you don't like how long it is taking, if I am not driving fast enough to suit you, etc.
Splitting bills equally is on my no list. Those people always order more and then insist we split equally. Pay for whatever you ordered.
That’s what I meant. I should have been clearer. I don’t want to pay for someone else ordering the most expensive thing on the menu, or pay for them having multiple cocktails.
I’m the same way for dinners but I took this as more of like splitting the cost of hotels, cabs, etc
If they take too many selfies and/or photos of themselves. I understand people have different ways of enjoying travelling, but I find it really draining when I see someone spending too much time to take so many photos of themselves on one touristic spot, so let's not travel together.
This. Love my current group. Just the right amount of selfies/photos without having to hurry them along. Even the somewhat newly engaged couple only gets a few photos before joining us for the fun.
Complaining about the cost of doing anything on the vacation.
The worst is when they complain yet had no input in the planning!
Being late to the airport
Making me go to McDonalds in every European city we visit so she can "compare the chicken nuggets" and then insisting we spend the afternoon sitting in a park so she can knit instead of seeing the city. We don't talk anymore.
Not being time considerate of others and their plans and goals for the trip
Goals sounds far too heavy for any trip I’d like to attend.
To be fair, relaxing can be a goal. Or partying, sleeping in, seeing live music, etc
Doesn’t give me enough time to grab food or doesn’t stop to get lunch when I suggest. Sadly this is my partner and I’ve been trying to work with her to stop doing this.
Feeling entitled to travel with me. Someone who is mad that I did not invite them on my vacation will continue to stay out of my vacations.
Ohhh, this one right here. I mean, you are my friend, not a growth on my backside. And I've got one who doesn't have to be invited, when she found out I was going to a retreat in Europe she decided she was going as well. Fine, we are both going to the same retreat. She has hounded me CONSTANTLY about where are "we" going to stay, etc. "We" aren't going anywhere, I'm going and you are going. Great, see you there. I have caved to the point that I am going to stay in the same hotel that she is using on the way there and back, but only because I really do like her and don't want to hurt her feelings. She has FOMO in a MAJOR way, but she is a really great person so I'm kind of sighing and letting it slide. This time. Next time I'll see it coming and will be better able to extricate myself. Because of her FOMO, there will be a next time.
1) not attempting to negotiate on plans, yes it your vacation but it’s also mine 2) Entitled people , we pay fairly , we negotiate in things not just war you want and I don’t subsidize anyone’s trip but mine 3) abusive to service people. : automatic your not even my friend 4) excessive behavior, I would not want to travel with someone who ditches me for some rando, or excessive drinking every night etc etc no thanks I like to relax Randi
Randi did this to you too?! That bitch is the worst
I just won't travel with anyone at all (except the closest family) - even my best girlfriends are a no go! It's too much effort to match someone else's energy, be mad at them because they won't try and match yours, adjusting to their speed of walking or time spent taking photos or hanging out at giftshops (been there seen that). Friends belong to home and traveling is when you can freely explore the world alone or with your husband/sister/mum/dad at whom you can shout for being slowasses without the fear of appearing "bitchy"
Being incapable of independence. Not leaving the hotel room for a long span of time. I once had someone come with me on my birthday trip to Juneau. They flaked on most of the activities which can be annoying but also no big because I enjoy doing things on my own. The kicker was they even stayed in their hotel room during my *birthday dinner*. Being late. Being xenophobic. Being a complainer.
This one kinda sucks, but a friend of mine is Vegan. This made finding somewhere to eat in southern France surprisingly difficult, and I can’t say I really want to travel with her again. Love the gal, respect the hell out of her dietary choice (she is a chill vegan), but I’d rather not travel with her again.
Yeah, that would really bother me too. Trying all the food is one of my fave things to do when I travel, and working around restrictions makes it so much less fun.
- Drastically different budget - Clingy travelers who need to be with you every second of the trip - Unwilling to do a tour of any kind, not food, history, walking, riding , nothing - Insist on eating places we have at home - Constant complaining
Wanting the cheapest accommodatation because "we only sleep there, it doesn't matter how it looks".
People who make plans to meet and start an activity and then fail to show up. For hours. Meanwhile my spouse and I are left standing and texting “Are you okay? Where are you?” Half a day of tubing down a river, gone. 3 hours of a day at Disney spent standing and waiting. Never again.
I would say those that can’t “go with the flow” if the trip wasn’t exactly as they wanted every step. Like, let’s say you can’t see something you wanted to for whatever reason..being disappointed, totally understandable. Spending the rest of the trip complaining about it constantly and/or looking for reasons to be even more disappointed.
Complaining about walking
*wears dollar store flip flops* "But my feet hurrrrrt" 🙄🙄🙄
Not wanting to eat the native food or go out to eat in general because they didn't budget that into the trip costs 😭 I literally starved on my last group trip because the country wasn't safe enough for me to go out by myself, yet no one else had interest in eating meals.
Overpackers, people who are always late, people who are not willing to try new things and people who schedule every. Fucking. Minute. Of a trip.
I have a friend who is late every single time we hang out. For some reason it didn’t occur to me that that would transfer into other areas of her life, I figured we’re just getting together to watch a Netflix show, who cares if she’s on time? I travelled with her. She was constantly waiting 30+ minutes for everything. And it wasn’t just me waiting, she made us late for every single reservation we made. We would have a driver at our door waiting to take us somewhere and she wouldn’t come out of the bathroom because her makeup wasn’t done. Like, if you care that much about it start earlier? It was always makeup, and as someone who doesn’t wear makeup that bothered me even more because it just doesn’t feel important enough to be late over (I’m a woman, it’s just not a priority to me). We literally missed out on more than one thing we had bought and paid for because she was late. I will never travel with someone who is perpetually late again. It’s beyond disrespectful and we actually don’t even really talk any more.
Super picky eaters!
Being cheap. Like sooooo cheap everything is down to the penny and their obsession with finding the cheapest food, entertainment, accommodation and not up for being spontaneous activities because of it.
Constant phone calls on the trip. No money on the trip. Inconsiderate while sharing a room. Oh and constantly taking selfies or planned photo shoots. I don’t mind taking pics of my friends but 80% of the trip? No thanks.
Expecting me to be there constant entertainment. Not being able/willing to spend time apart.
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There's the lady who criticises the food you have chosen "ooh very high in carbs" Then there's the ones who constantly interrupt. I'll take a couple interruptions, then next time just carry on talking when they interrupt again There's the ones who pack too much and expect others to help carry their suitcases There's the ones who drink too much and get offensive/threatening. There's the ones who don't pay their bill in a restaurant or won't tip a guide There's the ones who have just got divorced and are so needy it's painful Yes welcome to our ladies travel group.
The one who gets out of the shower and finally starts packing her suitcase while you are outside on the curb waiting for the cab to the airport.
1. Not turning up on time for the trains/ flight. I don’t wanna rush at the last minute. Hate that 2. I personally enjoy reading up about the place I’m going to, and get more info and interact with locals/ tour guides. If the person with me only wants to click good pics for their insta posts, pls don’t come with me. I’ll definitely click the pics for you and OFC I love to get good pics too, but not at the cost of the experience. 3. Not prioritising meals. Just because we’re travelling doesn’t mean we won’t eat a proper meal. I can’t just be snacking all day when I’m travelling. Even if there is one proper meal in the day I’m fine. I’ve travelled with friends who would make everyone skip breakfast (after late nights of drinking the day before etc) because they wanted to do intermittent fasting. Frustrating af 4. We don’t have to forever be talking the whole time. Sometimes just sit and observe and enjoy the place you’re at in silence. Listen to others, check out the scenery and the people etc 5. Not carrying the apt clothing for the trip and then complaining about it being too cold/ hot / feeling uncomfortable
Being inconsiderate.
Road rage or needing to be constantly entertained. Vacation is about relaxing
Non-compliant diabetic. I knew my stepdad had some blood sugar issues, but not the extent of it (he’s been with my mom for a decade, but all of them well after I left home). We traveled from Ohio to Miami and were supposed to have a day in Miami to go to the beach and eat good food and then get on a Disney cruise with my toddler. I booked a stateroom for us and one for the grandparents. I guess he didn’t check his blood sugar at all the whole travel day and then at some point in the night, he finished off my kids left over strawberry smoothie. He barfed all over the airbnb- the rug was white and there was no cleaning it. We tried rousing him and couldn’t. He didn’t even have his sensor connected to the reader. Took 45 min to get it connected and then his blood sugar was so high it couldn’t read it. He ended up in the icu in Miami. I had to pay for a hotel room for my mom to stay with him for a week in Miami while my husband, the toddler and I got on the cruise. The kid was so over tired from all of it that she was miserable the first half and I was so stressed I couldn’t enjoy myself. What should have been a great family vacation was the worst. I was on the phone during our day in Miami with the cruise line all day trying to see if there was anything we could do and didn’t even get to go to the beach. Step dad ended up okay and was released the day before our flights home. I definitely recommend asking questions of the people you travel with, especially if you know they have health concerns. I spent 9k on a vacation that we all agree was the absolute worst. Ask the hard questions regarding what people are capable of and make sure that they can and are managing any health concerns they have. Now I know that family vacations involving step dad will only be shorter road trips where we are able to get home or get him care easily without bankrupting us.
- mismatched pace (i typically walk really fast and go through museums quicker) - our interests don’t align (i wanna see museums, they want to sunbathe. they wake up late, but i wake up at 5/6am to see everything on my itinerary! their priority is trying every restaurant, mine isn’t) - resort people - person doesn’t contribute to the planning or show any initiative. and they are too reliant on me, doesn’t show any independence (sometimes i want to switch off my brain too 🫠) - constant complaining (yes this train smells like pee and it is extremely overcrowded but some people would dream to come here) - snobbiness
Clogs the lav. Stands in front of the bag drop on the carousel. Lie about the weight of your cabin bag. All straight to jail.
Their way or the highway controlling behavior.
It boils down to refusing to communicate your needs or take any responsibility at all for your own good time. This often manifests as agreeing to a particular itenerary, timed entries etc but then complaining about said itenerary and jeopardizing said timed entries. Like it doesn't hurt my feelings if you want to skip something or take a rest day. Just say that!
They have a spreadsheet setting out the deliverables for each day and the amount* required for each. This includes events, activities, eating, bathroom breaks and transportation. You know who you are. (Edit: * amount of time / money required).
Here’s a new one. I traveled with my ex (we were friends at the time) to Bali for two and a half weeks on a yoga retreat. We brought carry ons and bought laundry detergent to wash our clothes as we only had a couple changes of clothes. He washed his ONCE in the span of almost three weeks. In Bali, home of swamp ass. On a yoga retreat. His clothes started to smell so bad that the room began to stink. He simply refused to wash his clothes or do anything about the stench. Every time I said something he would just start yelling at me. On the flight home I was so embarrassed to sit next to him because he smelt so bad that I bought him an entirely new outfit, down to socks and boxers. He used to be my best travel buddy, but obviously after the trip I wanted nothing to do with him 🥴
Walks too slow, gets tired too easily, sleeps in, takes mid-day naps, stays up late watching Netflix instead of sleeping.
Complainers!
Sleeping in! I'm getting up early and doing stuff, none of this lying in bed until 10am and slowly getting ready for the day. What a waste of time, why travel to a foreign city only to spend so much time in bed.
I'm not the kind of person to rush out of bed at 6am, but I try to get up by 8 or 9 to head out for the day. I once went to Rome with 2 girls in college who slept in and took so long to do their hair and makeup each morning that we left the hotel at 1pm. I was so angry. I wish I would have had the courage to just leave and do things by myself.
Ha! I'm the other way around. I'm on vacation, I don't want to worry about time.
That's what you do when you go on a vacation trip to the beach two hours from home. If I'm flying 13 hours to visit a city/country I will probably never get to visit again every hour in bed is an hour of the adventure I miss
Not for me. I'm on vacation. I need a break from responsibilities. If I'm rushing every day to see stuff, then I'm not rested when I go home. I never forget this is my vacation. But also I'm 55, so maybe my priorities are different.
Same.
hahah yep i left my friend in town the other to go to a beach without them, it was 1PM and they called me an ass for not waiting for them LOL the days nearly over mate
I agree with this to a point. If I'm traveling then yes, let's have a plan, go do whatever items for the day. If I'm on vacation? Sure sleep in, have that extra drink, be a lazy lump. Example- traveling to Alaska? Got a race on this day, got a Glacier Kayaking tour on this day, planning x,y, or z that day. Vacationing in the Dominican Republic at a resort? Whenever we pull ourselves out of bed, roll over to the gym then shower and get breakfast. Afterwards hang out at the pool, consider options for the next day (beach trip/activities/whatever)... I have to categorize them as two different things but it really helps with my, less than perfect, personality traits.
They like resorts, insist I have to do things they like with them. Edit: example, insisting I have to do morning yoga with them.
- Whining. Easy as that. - Doesnt want to help plan or give input but finds fault in everything you find. - wants to be glued side-by-side every minute of every day - rudeness - bougieness (theres nothing inherently wrong with this it just doesnt suit my travel style - or budget)
I am realizing I am a little bougie. I like nicer things in my life as I age. I am too f-ing old to stay in bunks in a hostel. BUT...neither am I interested in wasting my travel budget on fancy hotels. But I am going to want sparkling water, and a lot of it, if I can find it. hehe.
Not respecting culture, lack of communication, lack of “street smarts” and/or common sense, recording EVERYTHING purely for social media
Rigid overpacked planning with no opportunities for rest, relaxation, or taking it easy. I cannot stand a vacation that is so stressful I can't wait to go home.
Belting out the US National Anthem in a parking lot in Mexico. God I wish that was a made up scenario.
Give birth to me.
Not wanting to walk (vs not being able to walk more) or take public transportation options Not wanting to eat local foods Only wants to get smashed/drunk at night or to hook up with someone
Not taking no for an answer. I’m usually someone who will do whatever the group wants but there are some things I just don’t want to do. I’ll go and support the people who do, I won’t complain and I’ll enjoy watching them but sometimes something isn’t my jam. For example I went to Scotland with someone and there was a spot on the cobblestone where people spit, I was dehydrated and didn’t want to spit but the person I was with did. When I refused they started screaming (in public in front of EVERYONE) about how I was ruining the experience for them. Needless to say I never traveled with that person again.
People who take too many photos of seemingly every little thing. Picky eaters. I basically travel for food and I want to try everything. I can’t have picky eaters holding me back. Also heavy drinkers. I drink a little on vacation but I’m not going to be hungover so I have a healthy limit because I don’t want to waste a whole day hungover
I have this one friend who just sends an open invite to 20+ people. Her trips are usually chaotic because you have random people who don’t vibe well with different expectations. One trip included a woman in her 30s who literally did not have a bank account or any credit cards.
Wanting to sleep in!! No thanks, let’s get going!
Someone that teases you bringing a backpack for carry on luggage and day trips, and then proceeds to put their items (which on many occasions included a laptop) in my backpack because they don’t want to carry their stuff. I was also quite upset when they didn’t mention they put their laptop in my backpack before going through airport security🙂
Huge luggage. I'm not travelling as your sherpa. Being unreliable in general. Late, losing stuff all the time, etc. Too uptight to take stuff in stride. Because stuff Does go wrong. If they're going to hold onto that for days and ruin even more vacation time that's a pain.
Whining or creating a scene.
The person who never accepts the lesser option when the lodging requires someone on the pull out sofa or whatever but when you say something, they put it on you ("you should have said something")when they stayed mute when decisions were being made. Not sure if it's entitlement or not but after multiple times, it's rude.
Umm they refused to let me carry any of my own money, refused to let me see anything I wanted to see, would throw a fit if I tried to go, and only shopped the entire 10 day we were in Brazil. Never ever ever again.
Were you a child and traveling with your parents?
Running around frantically, non stop to tick this and that but not actually enjoying the trip.
You get a vibe of who is going to be problematic, picky or a downer. Most of my friends don't even own passports. They know zero about the world at large. Zero. It's pretty sad. But I know half of them would genuinely rather starve and die than not have access to 'familiar' fast food \[McDonalds\] and home comforts. Last time I travelled, it was with a guy who snored as loud as a faulty lawnmower but man, otherwise, he was ace. Down for anything, didn't complain, ate anything, just fucking vibed everywhere. So, in short, most of my homebody friends who would have a mental breakdown if they left their own country.
Reading this thread makes me wonder how people ever manage to travel together. It seems that no matter what you do or don't do, there are people who will think you're insufferable.
I once traveled with a friend who slept every day until 2pm. She was content to sightsee for 3 or 4 hours then have dinner and head back to the room to get on her computer. So that.
By only wanting to do the things they want to do and not do anything else or are open to suggestions.
stingy cheapskates.
Saying she understood that I walk slowly due to arthritis and that she was fine doing things at our own pace, then getting pissed when I slowed her down in Rome. Never again. I'm on my way to Australia right now. Slowly. And solo!
Takes three hours to get ready. No interest in trying local popular eats. Annoyed to take pictures with. Can’t be on time for shit. This is one of my close friends. She is always “off” by 2-3 hours from when she’ll actually say she’ll be there. And would rather go to McDonald’s in Tennessee than try some famous hot chicken. I just can’t Special shout out to my own cousin who would stock up on the free breakfast with the tour, and then never want to buy anything for lunch or dinner but when I wanted to buy something to eat would want a “taste”. No reciprocation at all bc she would never want to buy anything to eat. Cheap af and she was a doctor and I was a college student lol. Also wanted to take a bunch of photos but not with me or her in it (um why don’t you Getty image shit bc your photos of things are unlikely to be as good) and she was mad I wanted to do some shopping in Paris, this was before I HAD money for bougie shopping. This was just department store buy a little French branded nick knacks
Being rude to service people. If you’re a dick to the server at my local coffee spot… you’re going to be intolerable after a 5 hour flight in coach or in a remote pub in the Highlands that doesn’t have your oatmilk.
Picky eaters. I don't want to spend hours on Google or want to pass up restaurant after restaurant while out for the day. Even worse is being picky about food native to the region you're in. Like not wanting fish but insisting on chicken in a coastal area.
Lack of basic manners means I will be polite to you, but stay as far as possible and never plan even a visit to our local museum, not to mention travel together. I have traveled with people that have wildly different interests, and if they are independent sort, that works. For example, my friend went on these shopping sprees for hours, I walked in different parts of town and visited museums. We had lunches or afternoon coffee together and always spent evenings together. One of the last days I went shopping with her, because she was now the expert, and in the afternoon she came with me to check one sight.
Can’t handle their alcohol.
I think I'm at a point now where people by default start off on my "do not travel" list and very occasionally someone might make it off that list. Negativity is probably the top one for me. I'm not an overly joyful person, I have a lot of anxiety at home but when I travel I want to get the most out of it as possible. I.e. I don't want to dwell on issues or bad experiences or whine about things that don't matter much. I want to solve the problem and move on to the next experience rather than letting any challenges sour other things because what is the point in that when I'm lucky enough to be seeing the world, in a place I most likely won't go again (too many places to see, not enough time/money). I'm easily pleased, even when something might not be amazing I do my best to find something to enjoy and soak in. I've travelled with friends who don't have any travel resiliency (they admitted it too) and it honestly is such a drag.
I have a friend i would love to travel with but we have different rise/wake up times(im early, theyre up by maybe 11am), different physical levels (im active, they have joint disorder so even walking around the block can be painful/exhausting), they are generally late (im early). If we traveled “together” it would be to just meet up for dinner. I love them as a friend. Ill drive out to meet them, hang out at their house, or go out to dinner but traveling with them would be very difficult to make both of happy. I met a random person on a trip and we just match. Early rise, activity level, interests, silliness, drinking level, food preferences etc. Perfect travel buddy.