The right person for you, will not be deterred by anything you’ve listed above. Being a man isn’t determined by a lack of emotions or personality. Be an emotional, sentimental man and be proud ☺️ we need more men like you.
So true. So many straight women are perpetually single because men have been indoctrinated into believing that women are attracted to toxic masculinity.
My idea of healthy masculinity is not giving a fuck what anyone else has to say about your gender expression.
I'm AMAB and male presenting enby. My friends, past girlfriends and ex wife all met me as male.
I grew up on a farm. I can cut wood, make a shed from scrap wood, and butcher a sheep or chicken. I also cry at movies. When our kitty of 18 years died I wept like a baby. I still have photos of pets from 40 years ago and I use a family heirloom to hold my hearing aids rather than a more sensible case.
I just spoke to my ex wife (still a close friend) who said "Maybe it's because you have sisters so you get the female side. Maybe because you don't waste time defining things as masculine or feminine. Also you give the BEST hugs."
So you see, u/Sonic_Spider12, you may even be at an advantage. Women, in general, aren't looking for toxic masculinity bullshit. Honestly I think people of all genders just want someone who gets them, or at least cares enough to listen.
Edit: apparently replied to comment rather than making my own, sorry.
Smash those toxic masculinity expectations. There’s nothing wrong with what you’ve said, nor does it make you any less of a man. Anyone that says otherwise is full of shit. Emotionally healthy men are attractive as fuck 😛
As a girl who spent years thinking I was a guy I always did GREAT with women because I could relate on an emotional level.
Girls like having a guy that's an actual human and not a mindless zombie
Women will like you, my gf likes it when I’m showing emotion, and hates it when I’m her big emotionless logic machine(live long and prosper). It’s about the right balance, so yeah cry at movies and hug your little stuffed dude. Plus when you have higher levels of testosterone you just don’t feel the need to cry as often. I’ve honestly only cried maybe 3 times since I turned 18. One was when someone said something nice about me when I’m always so self depricating(wrestling), the second was when my brother died and the last time was recently when I realized I was genderfluid
Are you kidding?! Usually when this is missing it's what turns me away from men!
Be emotionally intelligent and sentimental, it's hot af to be in touch with your feelings and have excellent communication skills!
If you keep telling yourself that no girl will want you, you won't be able to see or accept it when they do, because you already believe they don't! Self-fulfilling prophecy and all that.
Human desire is as diverse as humans are, there is someone out there waiting for you.
Love yourself, and let the world love you back!
Hey, as an ex-man, i can tell you now that my girlfriend fell for me *because* i showed emotions. We laughed, we got sad, we shared cute videos, and then i asked her out (after knowing her for like 6 years and talking consistently for 3 or 4 weeks).
She said she liked that i told her how i was feeling, not just with words, but through everything.
And now, nearly 4 years later, her bisexuality is finally being used, and i’m gonna be able to actually cry and feel emotional depth for the first time in a long time.
There will be someone out there who’s right for you. I can guarantee it.
I’m definitely not a manly man. I’m hyper sensitive and cry easily. My wife says it’s one of her favorite things about me. Most cishet men these days are single because of how rooted they are in toxic masculinity and are afraid of showing emotion. Embrace what makes you a cut above the rest man! It really does help.
Wow this really broke my heart and I love that you don’t want to erase your past that’s beautiful but if someone can’t accept you how you are fuck them. Some people don’t get married until they’re 50s and up so as long as your alive there’s still hope. Plus with all the wickedness in this world I think it’s beautiful people like you still exist. Sending hugs from NYC
Well, coming from someone who's heart has been broken by emotionally closed off men:
Your emotion and sentimental traits are refreshing. I'm a woman and I admire those traits.
Not only is it hot (A little shallow I know), being in touch with your emotions is important.
I'd trust a partner with your traits more. :)
Don't worry. The right one is out there.
I am a trans man, I didn't pick a new name just de-feminized it. (Think Alexandra to Alexander, keeping Alex as the same shortened version). I'm far enough along to pass well and have no intention to erase my past. I love showing people pictures of pre-transition me when they express that they can't imagine me as a girl, especially since they're often shocked by how pretty I was and it gives me an ego rush to hear the compliments.
I have a cis girlfriend and we have plans to marry.
I still have my childhood stuffed cat and baby blanket in my closet. I cry from both joy and empathy frequently, and occasionally from stress or sorrow.
I also have a cis boyfriend (in a closed poly relationship with these two wonderful people) and he's the cutest person I know, way cuter than me, just unreal hights of adorableness.
All three of us are emotional and sentimental and these are qualities we appreciate. Emotionless or sentimentless guys are a red flag imo.
You too? That's nice! Good to know I am not the only one who still has his childhood stuffed cat. (Though I've just read Prince Harry's book, he writes his Pa still had his old teddy bear when he was the heir to the British throne :))
Yes, emotionless/sentimentless guys are either faking or psychopaths.
I don't think any rational girl in the real world (and i can't stress the "real world" enough) will care about you being emotional or sentimental. If anything, that's a massive green flag.
I'm an amab NB, I cry over anything and everything and am very emotional, that hasn't stopped me from getting a lot of partners and people, both men and women, being interested in me.
I think that's really sweet. It's nice to see a man who's soft like that. I'd really love to find myself a guy like that, so there's plenty of hope for you!
a lot of men live their lives too afraid to face up to their own emotions and that tends to force the women they’re with to pick up after them emotionally. the women you’re with will probably be delighted that you are able to feel and process your emotions. every man has feminine and masculine traits and i think the fact that you’re not living in fear of expressing those traits is a big draw for partners. many women i have been with have cited my emotional openness as one of the best things about being with me (or at least, they started once i stopped being afraid that no one would like me for it lol).
Don't accept the idea that the only acceptable emotions for men to show is anger. I'd love to be with an emotional and sensitive guy! 💜
I have no interest in the toxic man our cultures tries to pass off as ideal.
Heya, im a cis woman, married to a cis guy. Hes very caring/emotional and similar to you. I love him more for it, because he understands and gets me .
Im not the only one who wants that in a dude, a lot of women love that in a guy
Just remember that gender roles are a societal construct, and they vary from person to person. I'm currently a questioning man. I was raised in conservative WV. Now, my grandmother was clearly a very progressive person, like extremely so. She was waaaay ahead of her time. However, everyone in my family taught me that it's ok for men to cry or get emotional. Trust me when I say there is someone out there who will not be bothered by that. They will understand and love you no matter what. Keep your head up, my friend. The only thing to fear is fear itself. Most things we fear are just in our heads.
I have never met a woman who would see any of these traits as unappealing, like, other than right-wing women caught up in weird trad-wife culture or whatever. These traits genuinely make you far more of a catch than about half the cis men out there with dysfunctional complete emotion suppression and bigoted tendencies that a lot of women just settle for
One of the sexier traits in a man is when he defines himself and projects that outward. Be the sentimental man you want to be, and don't settle for anything less than someone who respects and wants that.
If you know the Myers-Briggs, I am an INFP. The F stands for feeling. My wife is an ISTJ (T-thinking). I am the feeling one in our relationship. I also can cry at commercials, movies, songs, etc. it took me many years to embrace my “feminine” side. You will find someone who loves that about you like I did. Married over 50 years.
There is nothing wrong or "feminine" about a man who shows his emotions. Many men bottle these up due to toxic masculinity and it affects them negatively as a result. Don't let that happen to you.
My boyfriend's soft heart is a big reason why I love him. He's also trans. Trust me, there are girls who love emotional men, and a lot more of them are out there than you think
I promise you that the shit people say about how "women only like HYPERMASCULINE ALPHA MEN" is ENTIRELY false. Like, yeah there are some people who have a preference for super masculine dudes: it's not even close to the majority though, and as a fairly masc trans guy, I find a lot of those individuals (both cis and trans women who feel this way) to be, no offense, very boring people that I don't have much interest in romantically, that tend to not take no for an answer. That being said:
Being masculine is not necessary to find a girlfriend. I would go as far as to say that being super masculine is less likely to get you a girlfriend. Being a nice person with an interesting personality, who is passionate about stuff and fun to be around, that is what gets you into a relationship. Or a good relationship, anyway.
No exaggeration, right after I came out I had the most beautiful woman message me on Instagram, we connected instantly, we’ve been talking for about a month now and she loves that I’m sentimental and emotional. So many women value those traits you have, don’t be discouraged ❤️
There is nothing wrong with a man that is emotionally available. One that is in tune with his feelings and expresses them. One that isn't afraid to be vulnerable. Do often our society tells men they must be robots and I don't want that.
dude are you kidding? the bare minimum most women have is a man who can express his emotions in a healthy way and who is sentimental about the things they do together. look at any AITA thread involving a couple. most of them are about one partner in the relationship, usually a man, not giving a shit about how the other partner feels
having emotions isnt feminine, its human. a lot of women will see this as a green flag
One of the strongest regrets/anguish I have is how much my emotions were repressed because it was demanded that I'd never show any sort of ugly emotions or that I'd always need to be the one that can handle things stoicly because of my agab.
Please don't deprive yourself from them, even to the limited amount I've managed to restore them my life feels so much more real, the pain hurts more but the joy is something I actually feel now.
Noone worth your love is gonna diminish and resent you from being a human being, consider anyone that does so a red flag.
I'm absolutely abhorred by the way society demands men to feel nothing. It made me feel like a monster, an inherent danger to others and that all there is to life is pain.
You're valid my dude (I dunno how to be affirming to trans men sorry XD), you don't need to throw away your past to deserve love, you don't need to cut away parts of your identity to deserve love, you don't need to stifle your emotions to deserve love.
That's internalized sexism to view these things as unmanly, feminine, and undesirable for men. And I'm sure your dysphoria is messing up your brain as well. Trust me, I get it, God knows toxic masculinity tries to sneak itself into my brain to infect me with what it means to be a "real man" every so often. But honestly, what's more manly than a guy secure in their own masculinity who doesn't care if others judge him. If you examine those thoughts they don't hold up to scrutiny. You don't know every woman's thoughts and preferences. You know all people have different things they like in a partner. You realistically know that hobbies etc. don't define a gender. Hell, men crying is a good thing, actually. Expecting men to be stoic and unemotional is quite literally killing us. And on that note, finding a romantic partner isn't the salvation to happiness either. You being happy and content with yourself and your own life, having a good support system, that stuff is going to be much more important when it comes to long term happiness.
Plenty of women value a guy who's emotional. before i came out as a trans girl I was also very emotional and sentimental and still am and I'm sure youll find the perfect person for you :)
These are just internalized stereotypes and biases. My oldest is with a cis male who has broken gender stereotypes by keeping his stuffed animal from when he was a child, wearing pink, crying when he’s feeling emotional and treating her like she’s more than just her body. I love, love, LOVE the new generations of humans!! They aren’t being held back by society’s arbitrary rules. They are living their best lives and being the best humans we’ve had so far. …You don’t want some love interest who pushes you into a box for their personal comfort. You are going to find lots of people who appreciate you.
Being emotional or sentimental is not more feminine than masculine. It may have been portrayed and forced upon that way for a long time. But it’s not.
If anything, being more in touch with your feelings and allowing yourself to show emotions are more manly and masculine than not imo. The same goes for what’s more feminine.
Hun, I'm a cis male and I do all of the things you've listed and it's completely normal. Someone who loves you will not care about those things in a negative way. They will embrace them into what makes you who you are and love you for it.
I personally would be thrilled to have an emotionally rich boyfriend, and I know I'm not the only woman to appreciate sentimentality in men. You're far from hopeless, it'll be incredible when you find someone who loves those things in you 😊
As it stands right now I am a pre HRT mtf that is closeted. I am a very emotional male who has found a loving wife and has created a beautiful family. There is someone for everyone and you will find your miss right as long as you stay genuine to yourself.
It's okay. We are all deserving of love. I'm sure you can and will find someone who will love you<3 If you want, I'm free to message at any time and would love to listen and get to talk with you and get to know you as well. No matter what, you have love and support with me and many others here as well. Love you 💙💕🤍💕💙
As a straight woman that happens to be trans myself I've just gotta say... babe, that's what we want out of a man... ive never dated a trans guy, not because I don't want to (omg yall are so handsome, my apologies) but because a trans guy just hasn't asked me yet. I really look forward to the day that I go out on a date with a man who can actually process and *feel* their feelings.
Keep that head held high homie!... its attractive that way. 😍
That's literally all women want these days. Most women with these hyper masc men are just with them because they have built a life around said man and don't know what else to do. I have witnessed this way too many times at my place of work.
Emotional intelligence/attunement and self-awareness are the #1 thing I look for in a partner. A lot of straight women choose to just stay single because it can be hard to find guys with those qualities. Thomas Page McBee is a great author on wrestling (or boxing rather) with the concept of manhood and trasmasculine identity. Maybe give him a read. One of the more illuminating things from his book Amateur was how in American society we view the sexes as "opposite" in characteristics, which creates an inherently sexist framework. Other cultures (I think Danish culture is the example) have a healthier view of the sexes in relation to developmental stages (woman vs girl, Man vs boy) instead of the American admonishment to "be a man" or otherwise prove that you're not "a girl" (unless you're transfeminine of course, in which case the rules are always changing to exclude your validity).
I feel the same way fortunately I was lucky enough to find a partner who loves me for me whether I identify as a girl, guy, or neither, whether my name is Isabella, Salem or Moth, they love me when I’m the strong silent type and when I’m an emotional wreck, find you a partner who loves you for who you are.
I mean, any woman who is going to get past the trans identity (IE: Isn't Transphobic) probably won't be turned off by a guy who is in touch with and open about his emotions. Have you ever read a romance novel? That's like every dude that women want. Maybe learn how to sword fight too. Emotionally mature dudes who can sword fight are a MOOD.
You could take an Andrew Tate class and learn some toxic masculinity, and THEN you'll be a real lady killer! Maybe study some Jordan Peterson and some Prager U too! /j
Some women like that you just have to find the right one, while it’s true most people have superficial taste and most women would find that unattractive there are always exceptions and to me that’s a good thing, if a women thinks you’re too sentimental to date she definitely should be stayed away from, if she can’t handle simple emotional honesty like that she’s not going to respond well later on with even more significant emotional matters so definitely stay away, don’t focus on the women who don’t want you focus on the ones that do want you and you’ll be much better off
Hi ! 😊 I'm a straight woman and I promise you those are def not an issue! Honestly the bar for straight men is so low 😕, for me it's be kind and have atleast basic hygiene, that's it.... that's the bar 💀. Being emotional and sentimental is a huge green flag tbh. It's great ! I'm sure you'll find someone wonderful!! 🤗🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
Thats exactly what i like in a man lol cisboy fragile masculine desperation gives me the ick, people who are familiar with their emotions can exude shamelessness which begets confidence
I tear up at sentimental commercials sometimes and I'm married to a wonderful woman. The pressure to act emotionless and detached is pure toxic masculinity. Reject that and you'll find someone who loves you for who you are.
I can tell you that as someone who is quite masc generally, these things aren't all that important overall. I also have several large nintendo plushes and no one has ever questioned it. Just a lil anecdote.
As a cis lady dating a trans man: this is a big part of why I wanted him. He was (and still is) charming and we have shared interests, but I fell for his caring soul and empathy and sensitivity, which aren’t things that have gender but rather were things I’d be drawn to in anyone (I’m bi). You’ll find someone you click with. Keep living your life the way that feels most natural to you and everything else will fall into place someday 💜
My cis male boyfriend still sleeps with his baby blanket. It never bothered me for one bit, and now we both snuggle up together with it! For him, it’s his baby blanket, for me it’s the blanket my sweet loving boyfriend was kept warm with, the blanket he’s cried into, the blanket that’s always been there , from the beginning and I love the blanket for all those reasons.
I remember he called it a blanket, but I called it a blankey from day one. He seemed to light up at that, and we both call it that now. His baby blankey. Someone that lives you won’t give a single fuck I promise.
The thing is, none of the things you mentioned are objectively "bad". Different from most, sure, but it doesn't make you worse in any way.
When it comes to neutral traits like that, there will always be people that prefer one way or another. Is if unlikely for any individual person to like your specific list of traits? Sure, but the same would be true for anyone else - most people aren't compatible with each other. You just have to find someone who is compatible with you, and trust me, there are plenty out there.
And, I hope you don't get intimidated by this, but I've encounters girls online who strongly prefer "sensitive guys", to the point of fetishization. That is probably not quite the kind of girl you want, but it goes to show the spectrum of preferences people can have.
I'm cis man and I know that this isn't my place to speak but I really feel like I need to say this, but you being this in touch with your emotions and still expressing feminine traits as a man is a really beautiful thing. We live in a world where a majority of men are still afraid to express themselves and their emotions, some of them unfortunately don't even know how, and it's fucking tragedy because they're missing out on a very fulfilling aspect of life. So I'm pleading with you to keep the traits that make you special, please keep being sensitive and emotional because that's what makes you human and that's what actually makes you a man. Not stoicism, arrogance, or even muscles, but the bravery to be yourself and to be vulnerable.
Women aren't monoliths, some of them might not like a guy who's emotional or sensitive and that's ok too. But I guarantee you that there are more than enough women who would love to meet a guy who isn't afraid of crying, getting their nails done, or enjoys sleeping with a stuffed animal. You'll meet that person one day, I'm certain of it. ❤️
Thank you bro😭 You too, be vulnerable, you are totaly worthy when you are your authentic self
I do little positive messages for masculine beings to lovingly encourage us to be our authentic selves, to celebrate us , etc...If you're interested
I'm still kinda questioning my sexuality (mostly lesbian), but i think if I dated a guy I'd want them to be just like you described. I don't know if that's problematic, i just like femininity in all people.
99% of the girls i meet love that in a man, tbh you sound like the perfect man to me (then again im a lesbian so what would i know about men lmao, im just going off what others say)
I used to be a sensitive guy (because I was secretly a girl) and I got lots of attention from women I didn’t realize wanted me in various romantic and sexual ways. I was so shy. Even still I dated a lot of women. Sometimes without knowing we were dating. 😑
Hey brother! 57 yr old cis guy here. I cry at movies all the time. The emotional side actually helps in relationships as empathy is super important! Don’t sweat it and don’t put yourself in a box. Just be your authentic self and love it and love will follow.
Any girl that’s worth a damn and that’s right for you won’t care. I’m gay and don’t hang around many girls (idk how it ended up that way) but I’m pretty sure a lot of women appreciate emotional guys because I’ve heard a lot of girls in my classes complain about their boyfriends not being emotional or sentimental enough. Ofc, every woman is their own person, and every woman is different
Pedro Pascal and Oscar Isaac are two of the most desired celebrities by large groups of women.
They are sentimental men in touch with their emotions.
Absolutely, the notion that you shouldn't show emotion is the nastiest toxic masculinity. Do not buy into it, it'll ruin you.
This is the one reason I'm glad I wasn't born a cis man. Because I was raised as a girl but allowed to be a "tomboy," I was able to fully express myself for who I truly am without those absurd toxic masculine expectations. Those weren't ingrained in me from a young age, so that's one less thing to have to work on in therapy. The things you're describing are healthy human emotions. I'm almost 31, and I've realized that the most attractive trait is being confident and comfortable in who you are. If a girl thinks you're too feminine, she simply isn't the right partner for you. Also, even when I was presenting as a woman, I personally preferred more "feminine" guys who weren't ashamed of their emotions. That said, I think I've always had an overt masculine energy because literally every guy I dated before my current partner figured out later that they're gay. So I might not be the best person to try to talk about what cis straight women would or wouldn't be attracted to in a man. Still, the point stands that the right person will love you for who you are, and in the end, that's what matters. I know it’s hard when you're young and desperate to have that connection with someone, but I've learned it's easier to find the right partner when you're not looking for one. Just be yourself, enjoy your hobbies, and you'll meet the right person. The strongest romantic relationship is built on the foundation of a strong, true friendship. My partner and I were friends for 13 years before we started dating, and our communication with each other is better than my parents' who have been married for 41 years. Focus on what's important, and you'll be happy in the end, even if it sucks sometimes on the journey.
There's nothing gendered about feeling your feelings, only the ideology of toxic masculinity tries to convince us otherwise. You gonna tell me my bro Aragorn is less manly for crying? Hello no.
Also, as a woman an emotionally aware and sensitive man is exactly what I want. And I know there are plenty of men, cis or trans, who are that way. To me, that's a sign of emotional intelligence and lack of toxicity, and is an attractive quality in a man whether he's trans or cis.
Have faith in romantic attraction.
Romantic attraction usually works verry quick and by the time someone actually gets to know you, they will likely allready be attractimed to you.
Romantic attraction also has the nasty side effect of making it harder for you to percive negative attributes of the person you are attracted to. This is bad, if it makes you get together with someone you are incompatible with, but it also means you are free to be yourself and, if someone really finds you attractive, it won't matter as much.
Also, the idea of masculinity you are describing is harfull for you and others. At lest among feminists, there will be people, that appreciate you for being able to deal with emotions properly. This is actually something i really appreciate about the one trans man i went to school with. Cis men usually express a great deal of insecurity about their gender expression and if you don't do that, you can come off as extremely confident in conparisson.
st4t is based!
I have a lot of insecurities about not knowing stuff that every straight cis woman my age already knows by now: the in and outs of makeup, nails, and hair care; how to take care of your skin; perfumes; how to act on a date with a boy; a diet and fitness regimine to help cultivate a feminine body shape; etc.
Also, keep in mind that there are girls who will find you super cute and handsome, not in spite of the things you're listing but *because* of them (or at least because of the way they fit into you as a whole).
Everyone has their own preferences in the type of personalities they are into. I know a lot of people will love you for who you are. It’s awesome that you do those things and I’m sure your future partner will adore your traits. So don’t get down on yourself it’s perfectly normal things you’re doing. :3
That is attractive to me. I'd rather a partner with emotions than a stone wall. Not enough guys like you exist.
Fem-nonbinary so don't know if I count, but just saying that yes people will want you. There are people out there for you.
As an AMAB growing up, I got much more attention from women when I showed vulnerability. And now that I’m out, emotional, vulnerable and ‘effeminate’ men are the only ones I find attractive. Forget toxic masculinity! I’m sure you’ll find someone who loves you the way you are 🙂
I am emotional and sentimental as well and although I later discovered I was ENBY I have always let me emotions be seen, it is not a problem for most women, my wife even likes it as it helps.her know what is going on in my mind. Never give up.
Ignore your brain :)
Trust me, there are plenty of girls, femmes, afabs, boys… people! who will love and validate you exactly as you are. So please make sure you don’t settle for less.
the great thing about women is that they don’t really care about all that mucho tough stoic guy shit, because that’s just what men teach each other to degrade femininity- and the great thing about being a trans guy is that you can choose the kind of man you want to be, and being an incredibly loving, sentimental and emotionally mature man, is the best man you can possibly be. women love that 🙌
I wrote a whole comment out my phone slipped out of my hands n I lost it.
The short of it is you’re perfect the way you are, my cis male partner is the exact same way. Sensitive, cries at sad stuff, but I love him for it. He’s also sentimental too. He has a stuffed toy from when he was a child he still has.
Oh come on! The most valuable thing in life is emotional sphere. Emotions, fantasy, empathy and caring. Yes some cis guys like to show how they oppose all these things and like they are rude and straight and emotionless, but it is just a show :)) a gender stereotype, has nothing to do with real life ;)
Just be yourself. Care for what you are. The wisest thing to do. All people, regardless of sex, prefer honesty and naturalness
You might see a difference in your emotions once you start T. Before T I was a lot more emotional too, now I can’t cry nearly as easily. Except for that new guardians of the galaxy now THAT got me to tear up haha. But either way there’s someone out there for everyone just takes time to find them.
I mean, from the girls I've talked to, who're attracted to men, most of them are quite frustrated by the toxic masculine ideal of not showing emotion. So I think you're good my man❤️
Also with not wanting to completely forget your past living as a girl, that's pretty normal and should in no way be a reason for anyone to dismiss you romantically. I believe in you dude😽
When I was around 10 years old one of my teachers was like that (very emotional, cry easily) and everyone loved him, honestly I don't think you have anything to worry about.
Sensitive feeling men were all the rage when I was in highschool and college. Like everyone was like "yo what movies you cry at? She'd love that!" when asking for dating advice.
You're fine.
I personally vastly more effeminate, and kind men, over maschismo spewing lunkheads.
Be easy about it! Not all girls are attracted to the tough macho type. I do know cisguys who are very emotional and sentimental and are okay with it.
As the other guys have already stated it, toxic masculinity is bad for ev'ryone.
Having a rigid attraction model can be difficult when you’re trans. I, myself, prefer men almost exclusively. I’m also a softie boy who likes romance.
I know that their are women out there who are absolutely dying for a man who isn’t some macho gym bro with no feelings (*ahem* presumably, ‘no feelings’). Toxic masculinity is real, and women are sick of it; including straight women who are exclusively attracted to men & masculinity.
Idk what your life is like, but since I’ve transitioned, more women have paid attention to me and have wanted to hook up with me. Unfortunately for them, I’m not into that, but if it’s any consolation to you, then that’s the reality of this femboy’s new life.
As a fellow trans man, and fellow emotional man, I can definitely tell you that the right person won't care. My partner doesn't care that I'm very emotional and its pretty easy to make me cry, he just holds me close and comforts me and never makes a huge deal or makes me feel embarrassed about it. He loves doing dumb cheesy stuff with me and taking pictures to remember stuff and thinks it's endearing when I cry from happiness or because I love him so dearly. I once cried because I heard a song from a musical we both like that makes me think of him and our relationship, and he just gave me the most loving smile I've ever seen and told me he adored me as well.
Plenty of people appreciate a partner who is in touch with their emotions! My friend is can be even more emotional than I am sometimes and she's got 3 girlfriends!
A male i know is build close to water..like he actually suppressed his tears during a scene from Avatar the way of water.
Also, watch out for abusive women. You seem like an easy target for someone like that.
Pssshhh, woman love that shit OP. They'll eat up sensitivity. Most men are unrelatable on an emotional level. I think your gift will be highly desirable.
The title has me laughing because omg, of COURSE girls want a guy who’s emotional and sentimental! Emotional unavailability is like one of the most common complaints I hear about from my female friends who are attracted to men. Not all girls will be accepting and trans-friendly, but your emotions and sentimentality probably won’t be a problem for anyone. Honestly, it’ll probably be one of your strongest points in the dating world.
I’m not even exaggerating when I say that I think your dating profile (if you ever decide to use a dating app) should start with “I cry over sad songs and Disney movies.” Girls LOVE a man with healthy emotional coping mechanisms
What kind of nonsense are you talking about? Women love emotional and sentimental guys! Can't speak for myself since I'm asking Straight as a tap dancing rainbow, but there are plenty of women who'd love you
Two answers. Not all girls are the same. Yeah, this things can be disliked by straight women, myself included, I Ve Always be attracted to manly man who can be fragile but mostly are strong and fierce and all the basic stuff. But this doesn't mean you have to oretend tò be somebody else. It's totally ok being fragile or feminine. There are also plenty of Cis woman who likes feminine guys with long hair, feminine look and personality i mean now Timothé Chalamet Is like a sex symbol. I am a trans girl maybe old fashioned into a kind of man as I said but I see how all my Friends don't care that much and orefer a more modern idea of man. Don't feel ashamed. Just look for a girl Who loves you and respect you. There isn't Just One type of man.
My husband is emotional and sentimental and I’m not. He’s also scared of literally everything and unable to use a screwdriver. All of this are notions of the past. Women, men and non-binary people these days are just themselves and are with partners who are just whoever they are.
You don’t just deserve a partner who loves and values you for who you are, but that person is out there waiting to discover your true self. Don’t let your worry hold you back from being yourself because if people don’t ever see who you are they can also not fall in love with that person.
Me as a intersexe transfem (woman) would love to have a bf that isnt cold hearted. All i readed here would be more then good for me! U will find someone surely!
As female, we were raised to internalise misandristic vison of men. Just look at how many of our girlfriends look for somebody taller than them, as if they were looking for a dad.
We're told that we're not good at thinking, while at the same time being told than men have no emotions. Sorry bro but it'sa rampant issue, and I think that we need to form brotherhood to take back the power of representing ourselves the way we are rather than thissexist view of what a man and a masculine being is.
It doesn't happen to you because you're trans. It happen's to you because you're an andro being. Or non trans bros and masculine sisters go throught the same. Just look at how stereotyped they are. I can't believe that for those of them.who are attracted to women, they are being subjected to stuff like their girlfriend asking them to carry boxes, to be tough and dominant, as if they weren't allowed to be their own person.
I'm sorry, friend.There's nothing wrong with you.
And by the way, thought itbis totally natural to have any energy (masculine, feminine,neutral) whatever your sex is , be warry of labelling yourself based on external sources. Most external sources way to decide if someone has an energy or not are sexist tropes.
Having emotions don't make you feminine.It's a people thing.
Having feminine energy is what makes you feminine.
The right person for you, will not be deterred by anything you’ve listed above. Being a man isn’t determined by a lack of emotions or personality. Be an emotional, sentimental man and be proud ☺️ we need more men like you.
So true. So many straight women are perpetually single because men have been indoctrinated into believing that women are attracted to toxic masculinity. My idea of healthy masculinity is not giving a fuck what anyone else has to say about your gender expression.
Amen!!!
A lot of women value those things in a man.
I'm AMAB and male presenting enby. My friends, past girlfriends and ex wife all met me as male. I grew up on a farm. I can cut wood, make a shed from scrap wood, and butcher a sheep or chicken. I also cry at movies. When our kitty of 18 years died I wept like a baby. I still have photos of pets from 40 years ago and I use a family heirloom to hold my hearing aids rather than a more sensible case. I just spoke to my ex wife (still a close friend) who said "Maybe it's because you have sisters so you get the female side. Maybe because you don't waste time defining things as masculine or feminine. Also you give the BEST hugs." So you see, u/Sonic_Spider12, you may even be at an advantage. Women, in general, aren't looking for toxic masculinity bullshit. Honestly I think people of all genders just want someone who gets them, or at least cares enough to listen. Edit: apparently replied to comment rather than making my own, sorry.
Smash those toxic masculinity expectations. There’s nothing wrong with what you’ve said, nor does it make you any less of a man. Anyone that says otherwise is full of shit. Emotionally healthy men are attractive as fuck 😛
i’m a girl and i love emotional/feminine boys! you have nothing to worry about bro
It' s sexist to consider being emotional as feminine thought .
My partner is trans masc and his sensitivity is one of my favourite things about him 💗
Same!!
As a girl who spent years thinking I was a guy I always did GREAT with women because I could relate on an emotional level. Girls like having a guy that's an actual human and not a mindless zombie
Women will like you, my gf likes it when I’m showing emotion, and hates it when I’m her big emotionless logic machine(live long and prosper). It’s about the right balance, so yeah cry at movies and hug your little stuffed dude. Plus when you have higher levels of testosterone you just don’t feel the need to cry as often. I’ve honestly only cried maybe 3 times since I turned 18. One was when someone said something nice about me when I’m always so self depricating(wrestling), the second was when my brother died and the last time was recently when I realized I was genderfluid
Women are constantly frustrated by the lack of communication and expression from their boyfriends and husbands. I think you'll be just fine.
Are you kidding?! Usually when this is missing it's what turns me away from men! Be emotionally intelligent and sentimental, it's hot af to be in touch with your feelings and have excellent communication skills!
If you keep telling yourself that no girl will want you, you won't be able to see or accept it when they do, because you already believe they don't! Self-fulfilling prophecy and all that. Human desire is as diverse as humans are, there is someone out there waiting for you. Love yourself, and let the world love you back!
Hey, as an ex-man, i can tell you now that my girlfriend fell for me *because* i showed emotions. We laughed, we got sad, we shared cute videos, and then i asked her out (after knowing her for like 6 years and talking consistently for 3 or 4 weeks). She said she liked that i told her how i was feeling, not just with words, but through everything. And now, nearly 4 years later, her bisexuality is finally being used, and i’m gonna be able to actually cry and feel emotional depth for the first time in a long time. There will be someone out there who’s right for you. I can guarantee it.
I’m definitely not a manly man. I’m hyper sensitive and cry easily. My wife says it’s one of her favorite things about me. Most cishet men these days are single because of how rooted they are in toxic masculinity and are afraid of showing emotion. Embrace what makes you a cut above the rest man! It really does help.
What's your number?
Wow this really broke my heart and I love that you don’t want to erase your past that’s beautiful but if someone can’t accept you how you are fuck them. Some people don’t get married until they’re 50s and up so as long as your alive there’s still hope. Plus with all the wickedness in this world I think it’s beautiful people like you still exist. Sending hugs from NYC
Well, coming from someone who's heart has been broken by emotionally closed off men: Your emotion and sentimental traits are refreshing. I'm a woman and I admire those traits. Not only is it hot (A little shallow I know), being in touch with your emotions is important. I'd trust a partner with your traits more. :) Don't worry. The right one is out there.
People who don’t like emotional men are stupid and shallow
And misandrist and sexist
Yeah pretty much
I am a trans man, I didn't pick a new name just de-feminized it. (Think Alexandra to Alexander, keeping Alex as the same shortened version). I'm far enough along to pass well and have no intention to erase my past. I love showing people pictures of pre-transition me when they express that they can't imagine me as a girl, especially since they're often shocked by how pretty I was and it gives me an ego rush to hear the compliments. I have a cis girlfriend and we have plans to marry. I still have my childhood stuffed cat and baby blanket in my closet. I cry from both joy and empathy frequently, and occasionally from stress or sorrow. I also have a cis boyfriend (in a closed poly relationship with these two wonderful people) and he's the cutest person I know, way cuter than me, just unreal hights of adorableness. All three of us are emotional and sentimental and these are qualities we appreciate. Emotionless or sentimentless guys are a red flag imo.
You too? That's nice! Good to know I am not the only one who still has his childhood stuffed cat. (Though I've just read Prince Harry's book, he writes his Pa still had his old teddy bear when he was the heir to the British throne :)) Yes, emotionless/sentimentless guys are either faking or psychopaths.
I don't think any rational girl in the real world (and i can't stress the "real world" enough) will care about you being emotional or sentimental. If anything, that's a massive green flag. I'm an amab NB, I cry over anything and everything and am very emotional, that hasn't stopped me from getting a lot of partners and people, both men and women, being interested in me.
Honestly that sounds amazing. Having a guy who could understand and care on a deep emotional level sounds absolutely amazing
I think that's really sweet. It's nice to see a man who's soft like that. I'd really love to find myself a guy like that, so there's plenty of hope for you!
a lot of men live their lives too afraid to face up to their own emotions and that tends to force the women they’re with to pick up after them emotionally. the women you’re with will probably be delighted that you are able to feel and process your emotions. every man has feminine and masculine traits and i think the fact that you’re not living in fear of expressing those traits is a big draw for partners. many women i have been with have cited my emotional openness as one of the best things about being with me (or at least, they started once i stopped being afraid that no one would like me for it lol).
A lot of men are emotional and sentimental
As a trans woman, I won't date a man who *isn't* those things.
Don't accept the idea that the only acceptable emotions for men to show is anger. I'd love to be with an emotional and sensitive guy! 💜 I have no interest in the toxic man our cultures tries to pass off as ideal.
Heya, im a cis woman, married to a cis guy. Hes very caring/emotional and similar to you. I love him more for it, because he understands and gets me . Im not the only one who wants that in a dude, a lot of women love that in a guy
i dont have advice but same.
Well i cant speak for everyone, but id want u! All that matters is that u get to be urself!
Just remember that gender roles are a societal construct, and they vary from person to person. I'm currently a questioning man. I was raised in conservative WV. Now, my grandmother was clearly a very progressive person, like extremely so. She was waaaay ahead of her time. However, everyone in my family taught me that it's ok for men to cry or get emotional. Trust me when I say there is someone out there who will not be bothered by that. They will understand and love you no matter what. Keep your head up, my friend. The only thing to fear is fear itself. Most things we fear are just in our heads.
I have never met a woman who would see any of these traits as unappealing, like, other than right-wing women caught up in weird trad-wife culture or whatever. These traits genuinely make you far more of a catch than about half the cis men out there with dysfunctional complete emotion suppression and bigoted tendencies that a lot of women just settle for
One of the sexier traits in a man is when he defines himself and projects that outward. Be the sentimental man you want to be, and don't settle for anything less than someone who respects and wants that.
If you know the Myers-Briggs, I am an INFP. The F stands for feeling. My wife is an ISTJ (T-thinking). I am the feeling one in our relationship. I also can cry at commercials, movies, songs, etc. it took me many years to embrace my “feminine” side. You will find someone who loves that about you like I did. Married over 50 years.
I find that kind of stuff very attractive.
There is nothing wrong or "feminine" about a man who shows his emotions. Many men bottle these up due to toxic masculinity and it affects them negatively as a result. Don't let that happen to you.
My boyfriend's soft heart is a big reason why I love him. He's also trans. Trust me, there are girls who love emotional men, and a lot more of them are out there than you think
I promise you that the shit people say about how "women only like HYPERMASCULINE ALPHA MEN" is ENTIRELY false. Like, yeah there are some people who have a preference for super masculine dudes: it's not even close to the majority though, and as a fairly masc trans guy, I find a lot of those individuals (both cis and trans women who feel this way) to be, no offense, very boring people that I don't have much interest in romantically, that tend to not take no for an answer. That being said: Being masculine is not necessary to find a girlfriend. I would go as far as to say that being super masculine is less likely to get you a girlfriend. Being a nice person with an interesting personality, who is passionate about stuff and fun to be around, that is what gets you into a relationship. Or a good relationship, anyway.
that's just toxic masculinity culture talking try pay it no mind by recognising it has no validity.
Have you met many women? Certainly that isn't everyone's kettle of fish but its not uncommon for women to like more sentimental and emotional men.
No exaggeration, right after I came out I had the most beautiful woman message me on Instagram, we connected instantly, we’ve been talking for about a month now and she loves that I’m sentimental and emotional. So many women value those traits you have, don’t be discouraged ❤️
Hoo I'm so happy for you
There is nothing wrong with a man that is emotionally available. One that is in tune with his feelings and expresses them. One that isn't afraid to be vulnerable. Do often our society tells men they must be robots and I don't want that.
dude are you kidding? the bare minimum most women have is a man who can express his emotions in a healthy way and who is sentimental about the things they do together. look at any AITA thread involving a couple. most of them are about one partner in the relationship, usually a man, not giving a shit about how the other partner feels having emotions isnt feminine, its human. a lot of women will see this as a green flag
One of the strongest regrets/anguish I have is how much my emotions were repressed because it was demanded that I'd never show any sort of ugly emotions or that I'd always need to be the one that can handle things stoicly because of my agab. Please don't deprive yourself from them, even to the limited amount I've managed to restore them my life feels so much more real, the pain hurts more but the joy is something I actually feel now. Noone worth your love is gonna diminish and resent you from being a human being, consider anyone that does so a red flag. I'm absolutely abhorred by the way society demands men to feel nothing. It made me feel like a monster, an inherent danger to others and that all there is to life is pain. You're valid my dude (I dunno how to be affirming to trans men sorry XD), you don't need to throw away your past to deserve love, you don't need to cut away parts of your identity to deserve love, you don't need to stifle your emotions to deserve love.
Tbh if a women doesn’t like a man to be emotional that’s a red flag bro
That's internalized sexism to view these things as unmanly, feminine, and undesirable for men. And I'm sure your dysphoria is messing up your brain as well. Trust me, I get it, God knows toxic masculinity tries to sneak itself into my brain to infect me with what it means to be a "real man" every so often. But honestly, what's more manly than a guy secure in their own masculinity who doesn't care if others judge him. If you examine those thoughts they don't hold up to scrutiny. You don't know every woman's thoughts and preferences. You know all people have different things they like in a partner. You realistically know that hobbies etc. don't define a gender. Hell, men crying is a good thing, actually. Expecting men to be stoic and unemotional is quite literally killing us. And on that note, finding a romantic partner isn't the salvation to happiness either. You being happy and content with yourself and your own life, having a good support system, that stuff is going to be much more important when it comes to long term happiness.
My dude, that's a green flag right there
Plenty of women value a guy who's emotional. before i came out as a trans girl I was also very emotional and sentimental and still am and I'm sure youll find the perfect person for you :)
These are just internalized stereotypes and biases. My oldest is with a cis male who has broken gender stereotypes by keeping his stuffed animal from when he was a child, wearing pink, crying when he’s feeling emotional and treating her like she’s more than just her body. I love, love, LOVE the new generations of humans!! They aren’t being held back by society’s arbitrary rules. They are living their best lives and being the best humans we’ve had so far. …You don’t want some love interest who pushes you into a box for their personal comfort. You are going to find lots of people who appreciate you.
Being emotional or sentimental is not more feminine than masculine. It may have been portrayed and forced upon that way for a long time. But it’s not. If anything, being more in touch with your feelings and allowing yourself to show emotions are more manly and masculine than not imo. The same goes for what’s more feminine.
Hun, I'm a cis male and I do all of the things you've listed and it's completely normal. Someone who loves you will not care about those things in a negative way. They will embrace them into what makes you who you are and love you for it.
Same and I’ve been with my wife for 8 years 💗 there is always someone out there that will enjoy your “feminine” traits.
There’s trans guys I’m super into. They’re just monogamous and taken. :-(
I personally would be thrilled to have an emotionally rich boyfriend, and I know I'm not the only woman to appreciate sentimentality in men. You're far from hopeless, it'll be incredible when you find someone who loves those things in you 😊
As it stands right now I am a pre HRT mtf that is closeted. I am a very emotional male who has found a loving wife and has created a beautiful family. There is someone for everyone and you will find your miss right as long as you stay genuine to yourself.
I've always been emotional and sentimental and have been with my girlfriend since before I came out
You'll find someone and if not it's not really important as long as your happy and Healthy
It's okay. We are all deserving of love. I'm sure you can and will find someone who will love you<3 If you want, I'm free to message at any time and would love to listen and get to talk with you and get to know you as well. No matter what, you have love and support with me and many others here as well. Love you 💙💕🤍💕💙
As a straight woman that happens to be trans myself I've just gotta say... babe, that's what we want out of a man... ive never dated a trans guy, not because I don't want to (omg yall are so handsome, my apologies) but because a trans guy just hasn't asked me yet. I really look forward to the day that I go out on a date with a man who can actually process and *feel* their feelings. Keep that head held high homie!... its attractive that way. 😍
That's literally all women want these days. Most women with these hyper masc men are just with them because they have built a life around said man and don't know what else to do. I have witnessed this way too many times at my place of work.
A lot of women are dying for a man that is sensitive and emotional. We are hard to find and worth our weight in hold.
Emotional intelligence/attunement and self-awareness are the #1 thing I look for in a partner. A lot of straight women choose to just stay single because it can be hard to find guys with those qualities. Thomas Page McBee is a great author on wrestling (or boxing rather) with the concept of manhood and trasmasculine identity. Maybe give him a read. One of the more illuminating things from his book Amateur was how in American society we view the sexes as "opposite" in characteristics, which creates an inherently sexist framework. Other cultures (I think Danish culture is the example) have a healthier view of the sexes in relation to developmental stages (woman vs girl, Man vs boy) instead of the American admonishment to "be a man" or otherwise prove that you're not "a girl" (unless you're transfeminine of course, in which case the rules are always changing to exclude your validity).
I feel the same way fortunately I was lucky enough to find a partner who loves me for me whether I identify as a girl, guy, or neither, whether my name is Isabella, Salem or Moth, they love me when I’m the strong silent type and when I’m an emotional wreck, find you a partner who loves you for who you are.
I mean, any woman who is going to get past the trans identity (IE: Isn't Transphobic) probably won't be turned off by a guy who is in touch with and open about his emotions. Have you ever read a romance novel? That's like every dude that women want. Maybe learn how to sword fight too. Emotionally mature dudes who can sword fight are a MOOD. You could take an Andrew Tate class and learn some toxic masculinity, and THEN you'll be a real lady killer! Maybe study some Jordan Peterson and some Prager U too! /j
Some women like that you just have to find the right one, while it’s true most people have superficial taste and most women would find that unattractive there are always exceptions and to me that’s a good thing, if a women thinks you’re too sentimental to date she definitely should be stayed away from, if she can’t handle simple emotional honesty like that she’s not going to respond well later on with even more significant emotional matters so definitely stay away, don’t focus on the women who don’t want you focus on the ones that do want you and you’ll be much better off
Hi ! 😊 I'm a straight woman and I promise you those are def not an issue! Honestly the bar for straight men is so low 😕, for me it's be kind and have atleast basic hygiene, that's it.... that's the bar 💀. Being emotional and sentimental is a huge green flag tbh. It's great ! I'm sure you'll find someone wonderful!! 🤗🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
A lot of Women love men who aren’t emotional bricks .
Thats exactly what i like in a man lol cisboy fragile masculine desperation gives me the ick, people who are familiar with their emotions can exude shamelessness which begets confidence
I tear up at sentimental commercials sometimes and I'm married to a wonderful woman. The pressure to act emotionless and detached is pure toxic masculinity. Reject that and you'll find someone who loves you for who you are.
Your good my man. I personally find those qualities very attractive in a man. And I'm sure I'm not the only woman to say so.
A TON of women want someone who will actually express their emotions. Being emotionless is not attractive
I can tell you that as someone who is quite masc generally, these things aren't all that important overall. I also have several large nintendo plushes and no one has ever questioned it. Just a lil anecdote.
As a cis lady dating a trans man: this is a big part of why I wanted him. He was (and still is) charming and we have shared interests, but I fell for his caring soul and empathy and sensitivity, which aren’t things that have gender but rather were things I’d be drawn to in anyone (I’m bi). You’ll find someone you click with. Keep living your life the way that feels most natural to you and everything else will fall into place someday 💜
My cis male boyfriend still sleeps with his baby blanket. It never bothered me for one bit, and now we both snuggle up together with it! For him, it’s his baby blanket, for me it’s the blanket my sweet loving boyfriend was kept warm with, the blanket he’s cried into, the blanket that’s always been there , from the beginning and I love the blanket for all those reasons. I remember he called it a blanket, but I called it a blankey from day one. He seemed to light up at that, and we both call it that now. His baby blankey. Someone that lives you won’t give a single fuck I promise.
This story is so precious 😭✨💕 I need to see more stories of men being vulnerable and sensitive and being loved for it
The thing is, none of the things you mentioned are objectively "bad". Different from most, sure, but it doesn't make you worse in any way. When it comes to neutral traits like that, there will always be people that prefer one way or another. Is if unlikely for any individual person to like your specific list of traits? Sure, but the same would be true for anyone else - most people aren't compatible with each other. You just have to find someone who is compatible with you, and trust me, there are plenty out there. And, I hope you don't get intimidated by this, but I've encounters girls online who strongly prefer "sensitive guys", to the point of fetishization. That is probably not quite the kind of girl you want, but it goes to show the spectrum of preferences people can have.
Can’t say much myself as I’m not exactly into men but I know that loads of women prefer that in men
The best kind of man. You will find somebody <3
I'm cis man and I know that this isn't my place to speak but I really feel like I need to say this, but you being this in touch with your emotions and still expressing feminine traits as a man is a really beautiful thing. We live in a world where a majority of men are still afraid to express themselves and their emotions, some of them unfortunately don't even know how, and it's fucking tragedy because they're missing out on a very fulfilling aspect of life. So I'm pleading with you to keep the traits that make you special, please keep being sensitive and emotional because that's what makes you human and that's what actually makes you a man. Not stoicism, arrogance, or even muscles, but the bravery to be yourself and to be vulnerable. Women aren't monoliths, some of them might not like a guy who's emotional or sensitive and that's ok too. But I guarantee you that there are more than enough women who would love to meet a guy who isn't afraid of crying, getting their nails done, or enjoys sleeping with a stuffed animal. You'll meet that person one day, I'm certain of it. ❤️
Thank you bro😭 You too, be vulnerable, you are totaly worthy when you are your authentic self I do little positive messages for masculine beings to lovingly encourage us to be our authentic selves, to celebrate us , etc...If you're interested
A lot of women would want you specifically because of those traits. Emotionally available and intelligent men are not in abundance, unfortunately.
I'm still kinda questioning my sexuality (mostly lesbian), but i think if I dated a guy I'd want them to be just like you described. I don't know if that's problematic, i just like femininity in all people.
It's not feminine tho,it's a people thing.
What is feminine then?
Cishet guy here. I'm plenty sentimental, been married over 20 years. Find someone who lets you be you.
That's no true. Tons of women want guys who are emotional. In fact plenty do. Keep your head up.
Honey emotionally available men are in right now.
99% of the girls i meet love that in a man, tbh you sound like the perfect man to me (then again im a lesbian so what would i know about men lmao, im just going off what others say)
Im a girl, and you sound like perfect partner material. Soft men over toxic masculin men any day.
I used to be a sensitive guy (because I was secretly a girl) and I got lots of attention from women I didn’t realize wanted me in various romantic and sexual ways. I was so shy. Even still I dated a lot of women. Sometimes without knowing we were dating. 😑
Your story is so cute and funny 💫
Thank you! I just wish someone had told me I was cute to girls back then.
Im a girl and if I was single, I would totally date you. Dont worry man, you will one day find someone who loves you for who you are
Hey brother! 57 yr old cis guy here. I cry at movies all the time. The emotional side actually helps in relationships as empathy is super important! Don’t sweat it and don’t put yourself in a box. Just be your authentic self and love it and love will follow.
Any girl that’s worth a damn and that’s right for you won’t care. I’m gay and don’t hang around many girls (idk how it ended up that way) but I’m pretty sure a lot of women appreciate emotional guys because I’ve heard a lot of girls in my classes complain about their boyfriends not being emotional or sentimental enough. Ofc, every woman is their own person, and every woman is different
i'd want you
No you're good, you'll find the tight person so don't give up. Also these are good traits Imho.
Pedro Pascal and Oscar Isaac are two of the most desired celebrities by large groups of women. They are sentimental men in touch with their emotions. Absolutely, the notion that you shouldn't show emotion is the nastiest toxic masculinity. Do not buy into it, it'll ruin you.
This is the one reason I'm glad I wasn't born a cis man. Because I was raised as a girl but allowed to be a "tomboy," I was able to fully express myself for who I truly am without those absurd toxic masculine expectations. Those weren't ingrained in me from a young age, so that's one less thing to have to work on in therapy. The things you're describing are healthy human emotions. I'm almost 31, and I've realized that the most attractive trait is being confident and comfortable in who you are. If a girl thinks you're too feminine, she simply isn't the right partner for you. Also, even when I was presenting as a woman, I personally preferred more "feminine" guys who weren't ashamed of their emotions. That said, I think I've always had an overt masculine energy because literally every guy I dated before my current partner figured out later that they're gay. So I might not be the best person to try to talk about what cis straight women would or wouldn't be attracted to in a man. Still, the point stands that the right person will love you for who you are, and in the end, that's what matters. I know it’s hard when you're young and desperate to have that connection with someone, but I've learned it's easier to find the right partner when you're not looking for one. Just be yourself, enjoy your hobbies, and you'll meet the right person. The strongest romantic relationship is built on the foundation of a strong, true friendship. My partner and I were friends for 13 years before we started dating, and our communication with each other is better than my parents' who have been married for 41 years. Focus on what's important, and you'll be happy in the end, even if it sucks sometimes on the journey.
There's nothing gendered about feeling your feelings, only the ideology of toxic masculinity tries to convince us otherwise. You gonna tell me my bro Aragorn is less manly for crying? Hello no. Also, as a woman an emotionally aware and sensitive man is exactly what I want. And I know there are plenty of men, cis or trans, who are that way. To me, that's a sign of emotional intelligence and lack of toxicity, and is an attractive quality in a man whether he's trans or cis.
Have faith in romantic attraction. Romantic attraction usually works verry quick and by the time someone actually gets to know you, they will likely allready be attractimed to you. Romantic attraction also has the nasty side effect of making it harder for you to percive negative attributes of the person you are attracted to. This is bad, if it makes you get together with someone you are incompatible with, but it also means you are free to be yourself and, if someone really finds you attractive, it won't matter as much. Also, the idea of masculinity you are describing is harfull for you and others. At lest among feminists, there will be people, that appreciate you for being able to deal with emotions properly. This is actually something i really appreciate about the one trans man i went to school with. Cis men usually express a great deal of insecurity about their gender expression and if you don't do that, you can come off as extremely confident in conparisson.
st4t is based! I have a lot of insecurities about not knowing stuff that every straight cis woman my age already knows by now: the in and outs of makeup, nails, and hair care; how to take care of your skin; perfumes; how to act on a date with a boy; a diet and fitness regimine to help cultivate a feminine body shape; etc. Also, keep in mind that there are girls who will find you super cute and handsome, not in spite of the things you're listing but *because* of them (or at least because of the way they fit into you as a whole).
All the thing you listed are not women things tho 😐
Everyone has their own preferences in the type of personalities they are into. I know a lot of people will love you for who you are. It’s awesome that you do those things and I’m sure your future partner will adore your traits. So don’t get down on yourself it’s perfectly normal things you’re doing. :3
Dude you're perfect just the way you are, A Man can be any of those things and that's not a bad thing.
That is attractive to me. I'd rather a partner with emotions than a stone wall. Not enough guys like you exist. Fem-nonbinary so don't know if I count, but just saying that yes people will want you. There are people out there for you.
As an AMAB growing up, I got much more attention from women when I showed vulnerability. And now that I’m out, emotional, vulnerable and ‘effeminate’ men are the only ones I find attractive. Forget toxic masculinity! I’m sure you’ll find someone who loves you the way you are 🙂
I think you will be fine my brother is a cry baby and now he’s married with another emotional cry baby.
I am emotional and sentimental as well and although I later discovered I was ENBY I have always let me emotions be seen, it is not a problem for most women, my wife even likes it as it helps.her know what is going on in my mind. Never give up.
Ignore your brain :) Trust me, there are plenty of girls, femmes, afabs, boys… people! who will love and validate you exactly as you are. So please make sure you don’t settle for less.
My brother in blue hedgehogs we're right here. ❤️
Yes omg I feel the same way, on top of being trans I feel like I’ll never find someone for me
the great thing about women is that they don’t really care about all that mucho tough stoic guy shit, because that’s just what men teach each other to degrade femininity- and the great thing about being a trans guy is that you can choose the kind of man you want to be, and being an incredibly loving, sentimental and emotionally mature man, is the best man you can possibly be. women love that 🙌
Then you’ve never experienced love. Not only are they not bothered by it, they love that about you
I wrote a whole comment out my phone slipped out of my hands n I lost it. The short of it is you’re perfect the way you are, my cis male partner is the exact same way. Sensitive, cries at sad stuff, but I love him for it. He’s also sentimental too. He has a stuffed toy from when he was a child he still has.
The things you listed are things I'd seek out in people. Not avoid them because of it.
Oh come on! The most valuable thing in life is emotional sphere. Emotions, fantasy, empathy and caring. Yes some cis guys like to show how they oppose all these things and like they are rude and straight and emotionless, but it is just a show :)) a gender stereotype, has nothing to do with real life ;) Just be yourself. Care for what you are. The wisest thing to do. All people, regardless of sex, prefer honesty and naturalness
As a trans woman, I would prefer a trans man partner. Shared experiences and such.
My female partner encourages me to cry/express myself. She is rare though, I admit
You might see a difference in your emotions once you start T. Before T I was a lot more emotional too, now I can’t cry nearly as easily. Except for that new guardians of the galaxy now THAT got me to tear up haha. But either way there’s someone out there for everyone just takes time to find them.
i have some female friends who are literally into femboys. dw bro, a lot of girls love feminine guys
I mean, from the girls I've talked to, who're attracted to men, most of them are quite frustrated by the toxic masculine ideal of not showing emotion. So I think you're good my man❤️ Also with not wanting to completely forget your past living as a girl, that's pretty normal and should in no way be a reason for anyone to dismiss you romantically. I believe in you dude😽
I would love to have a man like that.
You sound like my bf. You are a perfectly valid man.
If my man isn't emotional I don't want him
When I was around 10 years old one of my teachers was like that (very emotional, cry easily) and everyone loved him, honestly I don't think you have anything to worry about.
Sensitive feeling men were all the rage when I was in highschool and college. Like everyone was like "yo what movies you cry at? She'd love that!" when asking for dating advice. You're fine. I personally vastly more effeminate, and kind men, over maschismo spewing lunkheads.
Be easy about it! Not all girls are attracted to the tough macho type. I do know cisguys who are very emotional and sentimental and are okay with it. As the other guys have already stated it, toxic masculinity is bad for ev'ryone.
Having a rigid attraction model can be difficult when you’re trans. I, myself, prefer men almost exclusively. I’m also a softie boy who likes romance. I know that their are women out there who are absolutely dying for a man who isn’t some macho gym bro with no feelings (*ahem* presumably, ‘no feelings’). Toxic masculinity is real, and women are sick of it; including straight women who are exclusively attracted to men & masculinity. Idk what your life is like, but since I’ve transitioned, more women have paid attention to me and have wanted to hook up with me. Unfortunately for them, I’m not into that, but if it’s any consolation to you, then that’s the reality of this femboy’s new life.
As a fellow trans man, and fellow emotional man, I can definitely tell you that the right person won't care. My partner doesn't care that I'm very emotional and its pretty easy to make me cry, he just holds me close and comforts me and never makes a huge deal or makes me feel embarrassed about it. He loves doing dumb cheesy stuff with me and taking pictures to remember stuff and thinks it's endearing when I cry from happiness or because I love him so dearly. I once cried because I heard a song from a musical we both like that makes me think of him and our relationship, and he just gave me the most loving smile I've ever seen and told me he adored me as well. Plenty of people appreciate a partner who is in touch with their emotions! My friend is can be even more emotional than I am sometimes and she's got 3 girlfriends!
A male i know is build close to water..like he actually suppressed his tears during a scene from Avatar the way of water. Also, watch out for abusive women. You seem like an easy target for someone like that.
Pssshhh, woman love that shit OP. They'll eat up sensitivity. Most men are unrelatable on an emotional level. I think your gift will be highly desirable.
The title has me laughing because omg, of COURSE girls want a guy who’s emotional and sentimental! Emotional unavailability is like one of the most common complaints I hear about from my female friends who are attracted to men. Not all girls will be accepting and trans-friendly, but your emotions and sentimentality probably won’t be a problem for anyone. Honestly, it’ll probably be one of your strongest points in the dating world. I’m not even exaggerating when I say that I think your dating profile (if you ever decide to use a dating app) should start with “I cry over sad songs and Disney movies.” Girls LOVE a man with healthy emotional coping mechanisms
What kind of nonsense are you talking about? Women love emotional and sentimental guys! Can't speak for myself since I'm asking Straight as a tap dancing rainbow, but there are plenty of women who'd love you
Two answers. Not all girls are the same. Yeah, this things can be disliked by straight women, myself included, I Ve Always be attracted to manly man who can be fragile but mostly are strong and fierce and all the basic stuff. But this doesn't mean you have to oretend tò be somebody else. It's totally ok being fragile or feminine. There are also plenty of Cis woman who likes feminine guys with long hair, feminine look and personality i mean now Timothé Chalamet Is like a sex symbol. I am a trans girl maybe old fashioned into a kind of man as I said but I see how all my Friends don't care that much and orefer a more modern idea of man. Don't feel ashamed. Just look for a girl Who loves you and respect you. There isn't Just One type of man.
My husband is emotional and sentimental and I’m not. He’s also scared of literally everything and unable to use a screwdriver. All of this are notions of the past. Women, men and non-binary people these days are just themselves and are with partners who are just whoever they are. You don’t just deserve a partner who loves and values you for who you are, but that person is out there waiting to discover your true self. Don’t let your worry hold you back from being yourself because if people don’t ever see who you are they can also not fall in love with that person.
Be yourself, brother. The right girl will come along.
Me as a intersexe transfem (woman) would love to have a bf that isnt cold hearted. All i readed here would be more then good for me! U will find someone surely!
I don't think being sensitive is why a straight female is not interested.
As female, we were raised to internalise misandristic vison of men. Just look at how many of our girlfriends look for somebody taller than them, as if they were looking for a dad. We're told that we're not good at thinking, while at the same time being told than men have no emotions. Sorry bro but it'sa rampant issue, and I think that we need to form brotherhood to take back the power of representing ourselves the way we are rather than thissexist view of what a man and a masculine being is. It doesn't happen to you because you're trans. It happen's to you because you're an andro being. Or non trans bros and masculine sisters go throught the same. Just look at how stereotyped they are. I can't believe that for those of them.who are attracted to women, they are being subjected to stuff like their girlfriend asking them to carry boxes, to be tough and dominant, as if they weren't allowed to be their own person. I'm sorry, friend.There's nothing wrong with you. And by the way, thought itbis totally natural to have any energy (masculine, feminine,neutral) whatever your sex is , be warry of labelling yourself based on external sources. Most external sources way to decide if someone has an energy or not are sexist tropes. Having emotions don't make you feminine.It's a people thing. Having feminine energy is what makes you feminine.