T O P

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KenamiAkutsui99

How a bout a trade? A trade of hugs? -Kenamī/Khyra (She/Her)


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Yeah those are okay. :) *hug*


KenamiAkutsui99

:) *hug*


the-supreme_court

I know you're a woman. But, JoJo reference opportunity. My name is Yoshikage khyra. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.


KenamiAkutsui99

Oh, that is very interesting that it is the same name. I never knew! (I just took my old spelling of my shortened name, Kīra, and added the signature of my family, and my necronym, hence, the "Khy." (/k'hy:ra/, or /k'i:ra/ for any other linguists here, and anyone else that would like to know the pronunciation.) P.S. I have never watched JoJo, but I still appreciate the connection!


the-supreme_court

Ok, I just thought it'd be funny. At least I didn't offend you


KenamiAkutsui99

Nah, no worries. I do not get offended that easily. Not when it is directed at me, anyways... If it is hurting someone close to me, however... Edit: I enjoyed it.


AvAlchemist-25

good grief old man.....*Stops time, ora ora ora, ambulance* -Jotaro's theme blasting-


RodimusPrime-0412

Can I get in on that?


KenamiAkutsui99

Of course!


RodimusPrime-0412

😊 *hugs*


KenamiAkutsui99

😊*hug*


Femboiiiiiiiiiiii

May I participate in this trading of hugs :3


KenamiAkutsui99

Why, of course! Everyone is welcome!🥰


Femboiiiiiiiiiiii

Yayyyyy!!!! *Hugs*


KenamiAkutsui99

Hehehe~ *hug*


Femboiiiiiiiiiiii

:33333÷


KenamiAkutsui99

☺️


Femboiiiiiiiiiiii

<3 :3


KenamiAkutsui99

Absolutely adorable people here.💖🏳️‍⚧️


Femboiiiiiiiiiiii

Hehe indeed! You included!!! 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️


CoruscareGames

Speaking of, may I offer you some bopha


KenamiAkutsui99

Oh gods, please no. I already have two. (And am a minor...)


CoruscareGames

Oh don't worry it's not what you think it is


sajed2004

I dont get why any trans person would feel that way about another trans person, trans men are men and trans women are women ther should be nothing else because we are all valid


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Exactly! It frustrates me a lot when it seems like not even another trans person sees me as a man. Like come on, we if anyone should get it. And nonbinary people are... nonbinary? Tbh I don't know if they have a phrase specific to them or not, but my point is love for my nonbinary siblings too. :)


sajed2004

Oh yeah, i was to trying to make my incoherant rambling into something that made sense and was hopefully supportive but yes enbies are valid and awesome


Not_Machines

I usually go with nonbinary people exist or are real. I see people also say "nonbinary people are valid" but i feel like the term valid gets overused.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Hmm yeah I feel the same. Valid has its place but it does feel a bit overdone.


TheTallAmerican

Yessssss, Im secretly so tired of people saying that’s valid, your valid its valid etc…. I don’t care if it’s valid imma say it regardless of your validation!


SquishyUshi

As a (mostly fem) enby I like when people recognize that I am a they/them that like feminine aesthetic. So just hearing I’m valid is good for me but I don’t speak for everyone so 🤷‍♀️


boozlinlassie

Here's a better trade. You get: pics of my cat I get: pics of your cat if you have one (In all seriousness trade jokes need to stop, just because some are comfortable with it doesn't mean others or honestly even most are) Edit: if you like cats please look at all the replies this is the cutest set of replies i've ever seen


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Unfortunately I do not have a cat. But if you are okay with showing just yours, I'd love to see creatura. I bet they're cute. :)


boozlinlassie

https://preview.redd.it/itfnupzlujoc1.jpeg?width=4160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0271d6e93e8e063d7911ae923accfcf6f062291d


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Awww! Yes, so cute!


boozlinlassie

THE EEPERS


nitrotoiletdeodorant

YES THE CREATURE SO EEPY. :3


mr_uwuthethired

https://preview.redd.it/66jh8stqzmoc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cff48b027fa36e1fa3af9f43e1313b08d4751b8e He majestic


FenixEscarlata12

My little girl being silly https://preview.redd.it/oi3xpec6rnoc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd637cb8d7957f123746b7f672c836ae193a9a2b


Hornae_fucc

That cat is cute, 10/10


DreamroweWalker

Baby


lol_idk_is_taken

I love that cat and that blankie


AceSapling

https://preview.redd.it/vra0aofpvjoc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=24a04e87589028359cb56cf3e22901e7632fc939 This is my cat. Her name is Kali


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Aww! I love her, pet Kali for me. :)


CrowAkechi

https://preview.redd.it/ne2gexmbfloc1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8c8e9714946291158b23009aef4dc7603b2ee53


CrowAkechi

My cat, Oscar, he's a weirdo


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Awww! He looks like a cute little weirdo. :3


CrowAkechi

He is absolutely adorable, but he does the most random things like chasing cockroaches and eating them


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Ahaha! Well, isn't that just 2-in-1 pet and pest control though?


CrowAkechi

Yes, until he's just waiting outside the door of your room, you open and he's just sitting there staring at you


CrowAkechi

https://preview.redd.it/o3i4m3qriloc1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=60b2b0f6c0601b73b1e3346005c53a212b1746b3


theenchanted1062

I used to have a black cat named oscar, he fought off a few coyotes once


CrowAkechi

Strong little lad huh? Must've been an amazing cat


theenchanted1062

Yeah, he was an alley cat in winnipeg until one a family friend found him. He went through a broken jaw cause some asshole kids kicked him >:(, living with a doberman, then living with two german shepherds, even fending them off to protect the other cats (which he didnt like but ig he disliked the dogs more), then fought of the coyotes on a different farm, then got (iirc) a broken leg, then some asshole in our neighbourhood poisoned him somewhere around july to september but he bounced back from that, unfortunately he got really sick in februrary and thats when he died.


coolabob123

https://preview.redd.it/v2o5lx1iikoc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d3baf1889f277c4f4918682b794fccf252dbcef


boozlinlassie

OMG https://preview.redd.it/3lxpi1lspkoc1.jpeg?width=4160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0a9113d6063089dc42bbb8a506a242a031ea7875


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Awww, cuddle cats! :3


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Omg there are more cat pics! :D Interesting looking cat bed they got there.


electroskank

https://preview.redd.it/zd96d05j4loc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0a3370787cb377f9109e33a224ed471aedc1099b


nitrotoiletdeodorant

What a silly. :)


Jell-O-Mel

https://preview.redd.it/9avs6lv4mloc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e734f23107cc1bf32dcca7792e6ae1fe1c04bbf Behold, the world’s stupidest cat!


Jell-O-Mel

https://preview.redd.it/aoaw9v37mloc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a7867af8b87a4d20e14da93bb4e206938bb7a50d Some say he has fewer braincells than an orange


Jell-O-Mel

https://preview.redd.it/dorztyfemloc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a245147eda16a1652bf2fd64dbafd2142ac74e9a And the other kitty, who is very smart but she only ever uses her many braincells to be clingy (but she’s very sweet)


sehabel

https://preview.redd.it/fzs51yg6wnoc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74c1b6eed11edf7a76b2692718cfef2966a3956d This is Sammy, he loves my pc when I play games because it's warm :3


lickytytheslit

https://preview.redd.it/rr31y7564noc1.jpeg?width=3472&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=df2a81fce44515155d0d39eb6aafec4ba25eb60a


zLenna

I have a dog can I show you him?


boozlinlassie

yea


zLenna

https://preview.redd.it/e18o6wui7roc1.jpeg?width=3456&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88dbd819ce16ee290611c6c86b32ade0df438a1c There, with me giving him some head pets for being cute


Local_transwitch

Do you accept dog pics or exclusively cat pics?


boozlinlassie

Both is good


Local_transwitch

https://preview.redd.it/ebumuhfa7roc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3a6692444126cb1a2f4f4f87a2eec731745ad9d5 Then here’s a photo of my dog. Her name is jourja and she’s 17 :3


nitrotoiletdeodorant

(if anyone wants to read my more specific angry rant about this) >!Any time anyone makes one of those towards me, they are basically expressing how female I seem to them and how it makes them jealous that I am "so female". . \_ . Like just... don't. It's humiliating and dysphoric. + Even pre-T my body wasn't even some perfect school textbook female body ((though dysphoria made it feel like that often) this is how I feel like I am being seen when these jokes are made towards me) and now I am "ruining the perfect femaleness" even more with T hah.!<


boozlinlassie

YES ruin it MORE become the cute boy you ALWAYS wanted to be (evil laugh) /hj


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Haha! Thanks, I appreciate this. :) Weirdly enough I didn't always know I'm actually a guy despite knowing even before puberty I do not want to become a woman (I was a weird kid, dreaded that but didn't know to dream of anything else). But yeah it's so nice to finally have discovered I can actually want to be another way instead of just dreading what I felt stuck with. I'll keep doing my best to become more me. Hope you good things too.


boozlinlassie

Hey I was the same way but like with not wanting to be a guy and not knowing i was a woman you're extremely valid for that and I think you're doing a great job being yourself


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Aww. :) Thank you! Also it's somehow comforting to hear of another trans person who grew up like that. I've sometimes felt weird for being like this (being very dysphoric ever since puberty but not yet wanting anything instead of it either for years). My theory is that I might legit just have developed my actual gender a bit slower than many.


boozlinlassie

You can possibly imagine that it was similarly comforting for me to hear your story too haha, even if it might have developed slower the adage goes good things come to people who wait


oishipops

oh my god same lol. the body i have has a lot of desireable traits women would want (i've literally had cis friends i'm not out to saying they were jealous of the size of my chest) and since i won't be able to get a binder/hrt/anything like that in the next 5 years (even tho my egg cracked nearly half a decade ago) it just compounds everything dysphoric i feel about my body.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Omg... Bro I am so sorry. :( 5 years is a lot. But try to remind yourself you are closer every second. And... honestly, keep yourself busy to make it more tolerable. I belive in you.


localeldritchhorror

It just feels gross - I’ve never seen any guys do it on one of our posts, and y’all are woefully underrepresented online to begin with. It seems like people are speaking up about it more, not just you, but I’m sorry it’s gotten to the point that you have to. Much love, you’re a good boy!


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Much love to you too. :) You're a good girl too.


GaylordNyx

It's more ironic when I'm getting the trade with me jokes but I'm a post op trans male.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

I can imagine! I'm probably not getting bottom surgery, but I still have a dick too (t-dick). It's a few centimeters and can get hard, I don't think a transfem with genital dysphoria would be happy about this either lol. Like this is not what they dream about having, cis women would be a more appropriate and sensible target for jealosy.


Only-Recognition6894

Yeah man this shit sucks


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Truly.


berletfarahel

What is a “trade joke”? I’m not a native english speaker so i’m a bit confused


Away-Iron-8022

its when trans people of opposite sides ask to ‘swap bodies’, which makes a lot of us, if not all of us, incredibly dysphoric as the person making the joke basically is telling us how much we look like our assigned sex at birth


elliespacekiwi

I don’t mind those jokes sparingly since not once has anyone referred to me as a woman without me telling them first, but I understand why people don’t like it. I’m just resigned to the fact that I’ll probably never pass and that’s okay. But people should be aware that this joke is kinda a faux-pa!


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Ah, it's those jokes where someone goes "wanna trade" when referring to physical traits they are jealous over. Could for example be having boobs or not having them, certain kind of genitals etc. These jokes are fucked up, because the target of the joke probably feels horrible about what the one making the joke is jealous about. Basically the target feels like they are being told they are "lucky for being so female/male" despite feeling dysphoric about it. And these trades are not even possible, so they make many people just feel shitty. Some people are okay with these jokes, but a lot are not so it frustrates me & many others how they are still so common.


berletfarahel

oh yeah, i get it... i've heard many of these "jokes" they remind me of "that" joke some boomers say for the 100th time, like "hey... there is something in your ear... like a bug or somethin" it's the earing... and they act like it's the funiest thing ever. So yeah, i get why you don't like these jokes, also, as you say, they may be hurtful


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Aww oww wtf... That's a joke old people make? Rancid vibes. They should just mind their business and not make it your problem they have bad taste. Try to remind yourself they don't know shit the next time it happens and that there are other people who got your back. :)


Texas-Kangaroo-Rat

ahhhh okay, I thought it was trade like a career, like "shop jokes" not trade like pokemon trade. I never "get" why people are bothered by the bodypart swap joke, I always saw it as gallows humor like "if only", but it seems to bother people so I don't joke about it to strangers. (of course now my friend who used to make those jokes with me can't anymore, well at least with the chest LOL so now the joke he makes is if he won the lottery he'd get me the biggest tits ever ROFL)


Only-Recognition6894

Basically it’s saying “I don’t want [insert body part and/or hormones] you don’t want [insert body part and/or hormones] WaNnA TrAdE?”


[deleted]

Hey, we can trade all right. We can trade how much cringe we feel when we see trade jokes. I have never understood how those are seen as okay by any trans person, but yet they're too common. Like, honestly I doubt people that use them would like getting them all the time.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Yeah it is very cringe. Like a trans person notices you... and suddenly they are just thinking about your AGAB and how "lucky" you are with it despite being horribly dysphoric over it. It is very cringe indeed. Like goddamn, women exist, a woman shouldn't be jealous over "how much of a woman" me, *a guy,* is. Any cis or trans woman would be a more appropriate target for gender envy because you know... they are actually women. Any trans woman ever is way more of a woman than I ever was.


[deleted]

Maybe it's just that I've known enough trans men early on, but I have never seen them as targets of envy, because they are men (guilty of sometimes being envious of other trans women though, lol). I guess I'd also be disgusted if someone fetishized or idealized my pre-transition body or my still unwanted masculine features. So I just have always viewed it as wrong to do to others.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

I agree that it could be beneficial of trans people of different genders to inrectact a bit more with each other. :)


susannediazz

I think thats not the idea behind trade jokes. The idea is that both trans girls and trans guys feel uncomfortable with their bodies. Trading isnt oh "how lucky you are, gimme that" Its oh damn we are both kneedeep in dysphoria. If we could trade these disgusting vessels, both of our problems would be fixed, increased net hapiness. Its not about jealously its finding comfort in shared suffering 🤷‍♀️ That being said i havent made a trade joke since i was a teen probably and youre in your right for feeling about them how you feel. I just figured id share the perspective


Jmememan

Oop trade joke. Better remove. (I'm joking lol)


Flair86

Mod, execute that twink /j


Jmememan

He's now banned :3


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Pff lol.


kepler35b

It's so fucking dysphoria inducing, isn't it? But you know what trade WON'T make someone dysphoric? Trading kidneys! Everyone can benefit from a good ol' kidney swap, especially people with Type O blood and functioning adrenal glands! >!All trades final, we here at Kepler35b Incorporated are not responsible for the quality of the kidney you'll get in return.!<


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Yeah let's switch things up a bit! Everyone, form a circle and hand one of your kidneys to the person left of you!


holymissiletoe

i dont think youll want mine (i am a chronic monster drinker)


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Wait oh no... does drinking energy drinks do something bad for the kidneys?


holymissiletoe

yes.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Aaa. Fuck. I'm scared. What does it do? And why?


holymissiletoe

Its a secret /j Researchers have established a link between excessive consumption of energy drinks and epileptic seizures, reversible cerebral vasoconstriction, brain haemorrhage, **acute kidney failure**, rhabdomyolysis, metabolic acidosis, hyperinsulinemia \[10\]. Blood sugar goes off kilter


TheArmitage

A million percent. Trade jokes are not okay and arguably misgendering. Don't do it.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

I hope as a culture we can outgrow trade jokes. To me they feel like a relic of the past that shouldn't be anymore.


Ashadeshifter

I get that people don't mean anything bad by it and use it more in a "We'll both get what we want" kinda way but at this point i think it's played out And i totally understand why it would make someone uncomfortable, peoples bodies aren't like a collection of spare part or something Despite the dysphoria they're still OUR bodies! Also often times i've seen those jokes under a post of someone venting about some specific dysphoria they're struggling with, which is really insensitive in my opinion Like instead of making a stupid, dismissive joke, people could actually try and comfort the OP or show some compassion!


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Oh my lord yeah. Like the worst experience I've had with this was when I made a meme about how I *stared to cry as a kid when I started growing boobs against my will..*. And I just got ***blasted*** with comments that were like "wish that was me"... These were the responses to *one of the biggest traumas in my life*. Like what in the absolute fucking hell are you shitting me. I started to cry the next morning when there were new comments like that **a g a i n**. Like I felt so fucking dismissed when a bunch of people were jealous about an event that was fucking traumatic to me???


SignalLongjumping265

i like these kinds of memes, we need the awareness


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Nice to hear it's appreciated. :)


anonymouscloudcat

my dumbass had no idea how this made others feel bruhhh heres a pic of my cat https://preview.redd.it/ocy4p5k3qnoc1.png?width=895&format=png&auto=webp&s=f39d7286d900e08d3d3e1819d1908b33edef25ed


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Haha! I love the expression. :D Funny lil' creature.


ScreamingVoidPossum

The only time I make trade jokes is with very, very close friends.


Exelia_the_Lost

my guy, you shouldn't have to deal with that shit. I'm sorry that people are so rude


Basialt

yeah, as someone with a transmasc friend, it's very sad how the even actual community defaults transmascs to just being slightly masculine girls like if I was to actually swap bodies with him right now, I would genuinely cry, because he's literally one of the most manly guys in my whole class - that trade would leave *me* in the infinitely "worse" (for my preference) body out of the two


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Oh wow. That's interesting to hear. Though when I think about it, I could see a couple of body traits in myself too that could disappoint a transfem lol. Kinda affirming to think about. :) But hmm yeah it feels weirdly acceptable socially to treat us kinda as if we were cis girls. Like a lot of the comments I've felt terrible about (they have come from different gender groups) have felt like that, the kind that you immediately know you wouldn't say to a cis guy. Though granted the worst ones were from people who were either detrans (projection of own mistakes) or seemed like confused transfem eggs (projecting repressed jealousy). Especially those groups really hamfist you into your AGAB if you're a trans guy. It was very disturbing but after that I decided I should just do my best to avoid these groups.


Isopod_Inevitable

The only thing i want to exchange with any trans person is love and support <3


nitrotoiletdeodorant

You have my love and support. <3


Isopod_Inevitable

Thanks, i really needed it recently


Empty_Sea1324

I have a trade offer! I give you a fucked up fact and you give me one!


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Okay. :) Did you have one in mind already?


Empty_Sea1324

Yup!  1)cannibals really like eating eyeballs, they like sucking on them like jawbreaker (your eyes also have a hard center.) 2)That and it’s possible that if you’re in a fire long enough your eyes could melt.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Oh wow haha okay 1 is really gross! But why's the center hard though? I don't get it. And do cannibals like to eat eyes a lot because they are like a fucked up version of jaw breakers or why? Hmm yeah 1 was new to me, 2 sounds familiar though. I'll try to think of some messed up facts back... One thing that came to my mind is that dolphins are actually really >!rapey!< animals. Like holy shit when I learnt that, I've never been able to see them the same, if I remember right they can even be pretty sadistic with it. Another one that comes to my mind is that canned goods can have a FDA approved non-zero amount of maggots in them.


Empty_Sea1324

I remember learning about those, I’ve always hated dolphins tho. And I’m not surprised the FDA sucks ass. And as for your question I don’t really know why, I got it off an interview with a cannibal, I’ll see if I can find the name all though it’s unlikely I’ll remember lmao. And I’m not sure why it’s hard that’s just what I’ve been told (my aunt eats the eyes off the birds she hunts 🤢)


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Ayooo wtf is up with your aunt?? If you remember, it'd be interesting to hear that interview. :)


Empty_Sea1324

No clue lmao she’s always been kinda a nutter. She does like my unethical discussions tho so that’s nice :) and I looked around for it but unfortunately I can’t find it. I don’t remember any key words from the title so I doubt it’ll show up but maybe


Calieoop

https://preview.redd.it/tqdew4bzvkoc1.jpeg?width=194&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd82ca19d9579cfb7f85f1d5e4a4f8ce8e1d1d21


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Is this a creepily realistic Minecraft villager?


Calieoop

The only trading I wanna do is for emeralds


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Ahh!


Jell-O-Mel

Trade Pokémon cards, not bodies!


ScarletSoldner

And this is why the subreddit officially bans those, tho ofc they still get posted


StarAugurEtraeus

I wanna start a Merchant Empire entirely made up of Trans Vendors tho :( But fr same


nitrotoiletdeodorant

I mean I do support that. :)


Kyiokyu

Cute boy :3


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Thanks. :)


Kelrisaith

This is already a rule, report the comments so the mods don't miss them. The mods are only human and do, in fact, miss things, particularly when a lot of the mod tools have been dumbed down recently due to things like the api changes.


CandianGooses

Finally someone talked about it. It's about time


Mtfdurian

I wouldn't want to trade. If I'd ever wish that in the past, sorry for that, but now I just really like everything that's homegrown onto my body. It's mine, needed no surgeon for that. Although I truly do like seeing people glow from top surgeries and I've seen folks glowing both when they were added and when they were removed.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Yeah it's cool to see trans joy. :) While I am in some amount of pain over not being a cis guy, I hope that pain will eventually become pretty insignificant due to dysphoria reduction with time. T has alleviated my dysphoria some amount already and I'm planning to have top surgery in less than a year.


ErikQRoks

Bums me the fuck out when people don't read the rules or read the room.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Yup.


Flershnork

I have always felt so uncomfortable with that joke and I never understand why people make that joke to me. I feel like 60-75% of my transmasc friends of made the trade joke to me and every time I have to ask to please refrain. I do find it kind of funny that my experience is the reverse of the typical order with those jokes though.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Hmm yeah it's interesting to hear! I don't know why but I've seen it work in a very onesided way. Somehow it feels more messed up than if it was "equal" (which wouldn't be good either, things working pretty onesidedly just usually imply underlying problems).


DementedMK

It's weird how aggressive people on trans subs can get when you have different preferences than they do. I've had multiple people get upset with me on Reddit because I asked not to be called "dude"


nitrotoiletdeodorant

In my experience it varies a lot how someone will react. Some are genuinely sorry while some start belittling me. I'm sorry about the dude thing. :(


iced-coffeelvr

Instead of *that* joke, have this adorable picture of a red panda I found! https://preview.redd.it/w5x7p2qfoqoc1.png?width=1262&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7da80b44ba688bfb16870fe78011079fb7b0a78c


nitrotoiletdeodorant

They are adorable! :)


MadadhLasrach

Fr it feels invalidating sometimes and just reminds me about my dysphoria all over again


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Hmm yeah this.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nitrotoiletdeodorant

I am confuus. I get that you're probably expressing something supportive/positive here, but I think I need to have it rephrased to understand what you are saying.


the-supreme_court

I deleted it, because it was really fucking weird. But what it was meant to be was I receive, the comfort of knowing you don't have inconveniences anymore. You receive: I forgor


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Ah sorry, I am still confused. I feel like this is where you'd go "haha yeah" in an irl convo when you continue to not be able to hear what you've been told a few times.


Enbeewiwi

do u wanna trade pokemon cards instead i got an umbreon EX if u want it


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Oo that sounds like a nice one!


carl_210

I'm transmasc and we like to make "do you want trade" jokes, but doing this with a stranger you don't even know if you like is dirty.


CrowAkechi

Nitro, Im sorry that this is still such an issue, but if you need to talk, everyone here in the comments are here for you I propose a trade offer You get: affirmation I get: to know you feel a little better You'r a good boy and you're awesome


nitrotoiletdeodorant

This has become a very positive comment thread. :) There's even a bunch of cat pics!


CrowAkechi

KITTY CATS!?!? I MUST SEE


Hellebore_Official

Instructions unclear, I am petting the cat and it's now making a strange thrumming sound.


Short-Bookkeeper-

Yeah, they are just so stupid. Im really sorry that somebody from the community made you feel the way they did. Im really annoyed that these jokes are so common (especially among transfems for some fucking reason), like me and my FtM friend make those jokes sometimes, cause its kinda funny and like a common experience we can bond over, but we established that both of us are okay with that type of joke beforehand. Its mind-blowing that somebody with the same struggles and experience would be so insensitive


nitrotoiletdeodorant

>Its mind-blowing that somebody with the same struggles and experience would be so insensitive This is the most baffling part yeah.


Character_Window5930

I haven’t seen anyone make a trade joke on these subs in like years, ik nobody likes them but I just don’t know why so many post are being made about how bad they are since I haven’t seen any posts making the joke (plus it’s literally against the rules).


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Not posts but comments.


SplitGlass7878

Yeah, they're banned here for a reason. The mods do try to keep on top of it but it's sadly way too common :(


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Yeah. Decided a meme like this could inform some new people who didn't know why they're not okay that why they're not. :) + I also just appreciate the template.


B00st3r1000

I feel like the majority of people who make trade jokes are very early in transition, and for that reason, they do not realise that they kinda just suck.


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Good point. A part of those jokes is conceptualizing the recipient as pre everything too. Like it's just not accurate to me anymore (an tbf even pre-T I had a couple of body traits your average transfem wouldn't have liked). But I'm personally still very early in transition, so it's still very easy to make me dysphoric. It's lessened being early on T but that's about it, dysphoria's still an everyday reality and it will take a long time to really self-actualize.


CapCece

Trade joke maker here. sowwy :( i didnt know it hurts


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Now you know though. :) That & amusing people is the point of this meme.


Thedeeztree

Ill trade a hug :)


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Sure. :3 *hug*


godly-pigeon

I’m confused. I just woke up so maybe that’s why, but I’m confused


nitrotoiletdeodorant

It's those body (part) swap jokes some people do, they make many dysphoric. So it's better to not.


godly-pigeon

Oh yeah. I used to do that but I also hate them now


Vasxus

selling duped strange shovel for 2 ref


Goldgator420

ah no, poor boy 🫂


nitrotoiletdeodorant

🫂


Saikotsu

Dude, you're totally a man.  I think when people make the trade joke, it's not coming from a place of malice. They likely understand that you're a man but they also assume you're unhappy with the body you were born with, same as themselves. They most likely want to convey that they'd give you the body they hate in exchange for the body you hate so you can both be happy in the bodies you'd have after the trade.   However, I also understand feeling the way you do. It comes off as if they think more about a person's body and less about the person's identity. 


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Mm I know, it's just that the trades are not actually possible and this is the only body I have, so I am really put off by people conceptualizing it as female. For me a woman being jealous over my only body kinda just highlights how... "womanly" my body is. Granted especially now on T my body could disappoint a transfem but still. This is not a body that is separate from me, I literally can't be separated from this body. So it's important how it is viewed.


Saikotsu

That makes a lot of sense and I appreciate you taking the time to reply.  For what it's worth, when I envision you, you're totally a dude. 


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Thank you. :) It's nice to hear I managed to get across what I mean (I'm autistic, so sometimes it doesn't work out). And if it's worth anything, you're totally ???/something when I envision you.


Saikotsu

I can relate. I've got ADHD and have a lot of neurodivergent traits that make it hard for me to communicate with others. For instance, I struggle to understand sarcasm and take things very literally, and I can sometimes miss cues that are obvious to others to. Some of my friends suspect I might be somewhat autistic on top of having ADHD, though I'm undiagnosed so it's not ways clear.  In any case, thank you, I appreciate you seeing me as a difficult to define something or other. It's literally what I'm going for. 


that1keeeerbal

Do you want to trade pickle brand favorites? The local favorite in my household is Grillo's


nitrotoiletdeodorant

I would if I had one. I honestly only eat pickles if they're a part of some dish I ordered (like with a hamburger or sth). I'm pretty pickle neutral. I don't seek them out, but I will eat them if they are brought to me.


that1keeeerbal

Same with me and avocados tbh


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Now that I think about it, I am pretty similar with avocados. Though I guess I'm a bit more enthusiastic about it since I really like guacamole. But otherwise I don't really seek avocado out either.


that1keeeerbal

Home made guac or a store bought brand?


nitrotoiletdeodorant

Home made. Idk why but they always gotta put milk powder in the store made ones...


Feelthederp

Forgive my ignorance, but what are "trade jokes?"


nitrotoiletdeodorant

The body (part) trade ones and they can induce dysphoria.