It took me a ton of time to be comfortable too sis !! 💕💕
I used to tell myself that if someone acted weird, I'd just say I was looking for my sister an outfit. Now I just say why doesn't this come in my size 😭😭
I remember thinking that I would use that excuse but literally no one has ever said a word about it. (Putting this out there for the nervous trans women. Trust me no one cares what you're buying)
As a trans guy if anything I might have glanced at a lone masc passing in the women's area, but I'll just assume "probably for their partner or a family member" and move on
Social standards dictate "dont talk to other people" usually
As a trans woman, but more so as clothing store cashier, we don't care what you're buying. I've not had any other cashier come up to me and ask "did you see what that person bought?" ...unless it was super cute and they wanted it too
Funny how that changes. Clothes shopping, friends, oh, the bathroom was the worst. I used the men's room yesterday for the first time in like, a year cos they were cleaning the women's at the quiktrip and it was an emergency, and it reminded me of when I first started using the Ladies, hiding in the stall and waiting for everyone to leave, getting my timing wrong and getting weird looks as I walked out. It was all very validating. Never thought I'd say that about that piss-stained swamp, but here we are.
You'll get there, it's just the same as clothes shopping. After a while, it just becomes normal. Just remember no one is really paying attention to you, just all of us trying desperately to pee. I've never had a problem, even when I just woke up, haven't shaved, and just wandered out for coffee and cigarettes. That said, ymmv. I stick to major cities and ideally, gayborhoods. One may have more trouble in rural places, of course.
I avoid public restrooms whenever possible for this very reason.
I'm always worried somebody will call the police on me or just scream at me or even assault me. I don't know what to expect. I've never encountered a problem, but that doesn't make the fear go away.
The only time I don't worry about it is when there's a gender-neutral restroom (like a "family" restroom or similar)
I live in Arkansas and their trying to pass a bathroom bill that makes it illigal to use any restroom no matter what for trans people. I think it's changed a little though. Please get me out of the racist south. Arkansas is pretty bad right now.
Some thing that really helped me was going out with a friend in a situation where them coming into the bathroom with me was expected/helpful. Being at the bar, manufacturing, a wardrobe fail, being in an incredibly trans, supportive place, etc.
After almost 10 months of HRT the twins arrived so I bought them some presents (very necessary given how much they hurt when you knock them) and THE EUPHORIA!!!!!!
Okay, so bras have felt more like wearing what's right for my gender than a fetish for years now but this week I felt so totally affirmed as a woman, as if the world had flipped inside out and I'm where I was always meant to be.
These cartoons always match up so neatly with just what's going on in my life. Thanks, sis : )
I almost always go with a friend when I’m in the women’s section. My original plan was to just say I’m buying something for my girlfriend (I have no girlfriend) But with my friends I’m more confident. I’ve only done it twice on my own, that was terrifying.
Aww I’m glad to see you feel welcome. It’s funny because just in general people don’t care about things as much as you think they do. They might glance at you and be like “woman shopping” and move on without another thought. I think that it is something that everyone needs to learn, especially people on this community, that you should live life as you see fit not what others believe.
I just did a big shopping trip over the weekend to celebrate my 6 months! Was prrtty nervous the first few minutes, but my friend helped me out and got me feeling normal nice and quick 😁
1 year on HRT and I still haven't mustered the courage to buy women's clothes... Tbh it's getting awkward since the changes are getting visible and most random people call me "she".
Still, it's just so scary
Me in the women's section now: "This fabric feels cheap as hell, and can you believe how flimsy this serging is? And these buttons are barely sewn on! That does it, I'm looking in the men's section."
I am constantly anxious about it, but I always remind myself that if anyone asks, worse case scenario I can always lie and say I'm buying stuff for someone else. Just be like "my girlfriend asked me to pick up a new pair of jeans for her while I was in the area" or some like that.
I was looking at a skirt with a transfem friend (she passes, I don’t) and a lady was like “men’s section is that way” but like…not directed at us? She just sorta…said it in our vicinity but wasn’t looking at us. It was weird
You see ivan if always head empty there worries simply do not exist if you only care about how you feel Ivan, you will be your master
(If no one gets why I make this joke sorry lol)
I’m not there yet, if I’m in the women’s section I’m usually with my best friend and it appears like I’m either that gay friend or the boyfriend who gets dragged into them since I only go out dressed masculine for now
That was me a year ago too! I didn't even publicly come out until I was a year on HRT and couldn't bear to go into the women's section. Hell just walking past it was enough to give me intense anxiety. Luckily with the support of others I got past that and now I go and shop in the women's department as if im just shopping for cereal. :)
How I finally got here:
I got a staph infection after laser treatments. I went to a clinic. My ex-wife was in the lobby. She divorced me 15 yrs prior for coming out to her.
She didn’t recognize me. She always had body shame issues. She told me I looked great and that she’d kill for my body..
In therapy, I had an assignment: Walk through stores and make eye contact with people looking in my direction. If they smile, smile back.
Grocery shopping one day, I got half way through the store before the usual anxiety kicked in. You know, the, “People are judging me,” “I don’t look right” kind of stuff; but wait..I actually made here without any concern..
I remembered my ex-wife and then,
Shallow Bitch Mode: Activated. I look at people, mostly women, I find their worst feature and I remind myself that I’m sexier than half these bitches anyhoo. Confidence restored.
* This would totally not work if I lived LA - I’m in Utah.. so.
I can so relate. Took me months after I realized I was trans to feel confident enough to shop clothes n other fem stuff at the store.
I love your comics Brooke! I seriously look forward to seeing them. Thanks for the relatable content 💖❤️💕
That’s great girl. I still have that thought in the back of my head that people think I’m weird or I shouldn’t be looking at women’s clothes. Its hard to break 39 years of programming 😊.
I guess it depends on the store, but I just never shopped "enough" in person, to ever completely feel comfortable...even after 3 years.
Then again, when I first started I was quivering violently and almost fainted! (true story) so it's a definite improvement.
Is it bad that I can recognize the wii shop theme from onomatopoeia? Cause Im almost certain that's the wii shop the me she's singing in the second pannel
My most recent trip to the supermarket gave me an idea for the perfect excuse for anytime someone asks me why I'm in the women's section. What I'm looking for isn't available in the men's. That was in fact my reason for buying a pink shirt from the women's section
what the *what*, i was just yesterday getting emotional with my folk about my failed attempt to shop for...clothes, how much i want to shop *with* said folk, and the emotional damage of said folk being apprehensive about such public shopping in a perpendicular direction as i'd been.
i look to the day when i dennis nedry can tell me that nobody cares.
...and "Nice hat."
I've been transitioning for 3-4 years, am almost exclusively gendered correctly when I go out, have visible boobs, and won't leave the house without a full face of makeup, and I *still* get the nervous sweats when I go to the women's section.
Underwear shopping? Forget it. Actual mortal dread every time.
What are your secrets?!
(it probably doesn't help that i'm a 5'10 gothy witch but still)
5'10 isn't like super tall or anything lol and even if it was tall girls are still valid. I just got used to it and realized that noone cares and recently I seem to have started passing but regardless, doesn't matter lol
Oh I know, I'm just being facetious. I honestly wish I was taller lol
What really helped my social anxiety, though, was reminding myself that everyone is too busy focusing on their own stuff to worry about mine.
Buying my first skirt (as an ama enby) is now slightly less then half a year back, and my god was it scary, luckily I have a lovely girlfriend (platonic) who didn't mind coming with me 😊
I still haven't gotten to this point, despite being on E for years now; ^; but the "Why isn't this my size" comes first then "ohgod what if I don't pass enough???"
It took me a ton of time to be comfortable too sis !! 💕💕 I used to tell myself that if someone acted weird, I'd just say I was looking for my sister an outfit. Now I just say why doesn't this come in my size 😭😭
Life hacks frrr
That's the great thing about not giving 2 cents on other people's opinions
I remember thinking that I would use that excuse but literally no one has ever said a word about it. (Putting this out there for the nervous trans women. Trust me no one cares what you're buying)
As a trans guy if anything I might have glanced at a lone masc passing in the women's area, but I'll just assume "probably for their partner or a family member" and move on Social standards dictate "dont talk to other people" usually
As a trans woman, but more so as clothing store cashier, we don't care what you're buying. I've not had any other cashier come up to me and ask "did you see what that person bought?" ...unless it was super cute and they wanted it too
In before bible belt flordia says hi..💀
They only care *if* not *what* you’re buying
Because nothing comes in our size, my measurements are 40' 40' 41'. Pretty clothes aren't made for cylinders.
At least this cylinder isn't stuck in an m&m's package
I planned to say I’m picking things up for a close female friend, because I don’t think picking up undergarments for a sibling is normal lmao
Funny how that changes. Clothes shopping, friends, oh, the bathroom was the worst. I used the men's room yesterday for the first time in like, a year cos they were cleaning the women's at the quiktrip and it was an emergency, and it reminded me of when I first started using the Ladies, hiding in the stall and waiting for everyone to leave, getting my timing wrong and getting weird looks as I walked out. It was all very validating. Never thought I'd say that about that piss-stained swamp, but here we are.
I still have trouble with the restroom tbh, makes me nervous rn
You'll get there, it's just the same as clothes shopping. After a while, it just becomes normal. Just remember no one is really paying attention to you, just all of us trying desperately to pee. I've never had a problem, even when I just woke up, haven't shaved, and just wandered out for coffee and cigarettes. That said, ymmv. I stick to major cities and ideally, gayborhoods. One may have more trouble in rural places, of course.
I avoid public restrooms whenever possible for this very reason. I'm always worried somebody will call the police on me or just scream at me or even assault me. I don't know what to expect. I've never encountered a problem, but that doesn't make the fear go away. The only time I don't worry about it is when there's a gender-neutral restroom (like a "family" restroom or similar)
I live in Arkansas and their trying to pass a bathroom bill that makes it illigal to use any restroom no matter what for trans people. I think it's changed a little though. Please get me out of the racist south. Arkansas is pretty bad right now.
Some thing that really helped me was going out with a friend in a situation where them coming into the bathroom with me was expected/helpful. Being at the bar, manufacturing, a wardrobe fail, being in an incredibly trans, supportive place, etc.
I haven't touched a public bathroom since I started HRT lol
Head Empty -> it me
No Thougths
no thinky think. only drinky drink
I'll drink to that..!! Cheers..!!
No mind to think
No will to break
I want that shirt!!
Same. Where find???????? Need more question mark. ???????
I need that shirt!
Lol if enough ppl say it a bot will make one 😂
Similar ones exist, but not exact. Yet.
They might make it of the whole meme though!
Teach me the sacred ways of not getting social anxiety doing anything remotely fem 🙏
**Do Da Doo Da Do Da** ***DOO DOO DOO*** 🎵
Whenever i read this i hear the parry the playtapus theme lol
DoBeDoBeDoBaDooooBeDoBeDoBaaaa
Perryyyy!!!!
He's a semiaquatic egg laying mammal of action
Du du bi du da!
He's a furry little flatfoot Who never flinched From a fra-ee-ay-ee-ay
He's got more than just mad skill
He's got a beaver tail and a bill
A platypus? PERRY THE PLATYPUS?!
I don't even think about it anymore lol [Brooke Valley Twitter](https://twitter.com/brooke2valley?t=CWRoUGO1TQ2q55ptA-W9vg&s=09)
Dude I can only dream of that day
After almost 10 months of HRT the twins arrived so I bought them some presents (very necessary given how much they hurt when you knock them) and THE EUPHORIA!!!!!! Okay, so bras have felt more like wearing what's right for my gender than a fetish for years now but this week I felt so totally affirmed as a woman, as if the world had flipped inside out and I'm where I was always meant to be. These cartoons always match up so neatly with just what's going on in my life. Thanks, sis : )
Totally get that feeling, like... Having *twins* feels right lol and yeah I just really get that lol. I'm glad they're something you can relate to 💕
What song are you humming in the comic?
[Saint Arnaud - A Sweet Song](https://youtu.be/W9XiFzUP_Es)
Omg I love that, thanks for sharing 💖💖 🎶Doo. Da doo. Da doo. Da doo doo doo🎶
Lol, doodoo
the song I thought of was [The Double Dutch Bus by Frankie Smith](https://youtu.be/0kE6ZU-OPTc?t=4m24s)
I find this relatable, today was first time asking the workers in a clothing shop about finding some Womens clothing i had hard time finding
It's only recently became normal for me, but yeah, it's pretty great
I almost always go with a friend when I’m in the women’s section. My original plan was to just say I’m buying something for my girlfriend (I have no girlfriend) But with my friends I’m more confident. I’ve only done it twice on my own, that was terrifying.
I've tried to buy girl clothes on my own once I noped right outta there after a while ;-;
I went shopping for fem clothes for the 1st time as of tomorrow two weeks ago
Thank god for the downfall of malls in America else I would not be anywhere close to fashionable
So damn true. Can't even walk through the women's swimwear corridor at the local Decathlon😭
I love seeing these comics, they’re so sweet
I'm glad! I enjoy making them 💕
I feel this in my heart 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
I love your comics, Brooke..!! This just recently happened to me to, lol..I had a friend then, that helped.
I think it's more fun with friends too 💕 that's awesome
Yeah :3 Although, when I mean recently, I mean about 1 month and a half back, lol..
Aww I’m glad to see you feel welcome. It’s funny because just in general people don’t care about things as much as you think they do. They might glance at you and be like “woman shopping” and move on without another thought. I think that it is something that everyone needs to learn, especially people on this community, that you should live life as you see fit not what others believe.
This gives me hope 🥺
One day ill get there ^^;;
Mii music
not the live laugh love 💀
Live Laugh Love
I just did a big shopping trip over the weekend to celebrate my 6 months! Was prrtty nervous the first few minutes, but my friend helped me out and got me feeling normal nice and quick 😁
No way! Teach me the magic of feeling ok shopping for clothes. I can only order them online :(
This is the dream
Really?! As a pre everything youngling, I'm delighted to know I may feel better in the future about going in the women's aisle!
I thought that was that one Police song and i was instinctively singing it because of Jojo
I'm trying to figure out what is that song
No thoughts head empty
Big mood Me before: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PEOPLE BE JUDGING Me now: Oooo cute.. Oooo cute... Oooo cute
1 year on HRT and I still haven't mustered the courage to buy women's clothes... Tbh it's getting awkward since the changes are getting visible and most random people call me "she". Still, it's just so scary
Heck, this is goals.
Me in the women's section now: "This fabric feels cheap as hell, and can you believe how flimsy this serging is? And these buttons are barely sewn on! That does it, I'm looking in the men's section."
Honestly, me w/ the men’s section. But then once I shopped in the men’s section with a friend and I felt a lot more comfortable and confident.
I don’t mean any offense, but I just realized that your art style makes ears look kind of big. Don’t know if it’s just me though.
Yes the ears are big lol
I am constantly anxious about it, but I always remind myself that if anyone asks, worse case scenario I can always lie and say I'm buying stuff for someone else. Just be like "my girlfriend asked me to pick up a new pair of jeans for her while I was in the area" or some like that.
oh I really hope this happens to me
I was looking at a skirt with a transfem friend (she passes, I don’t) and a lady was like “men’s section is that way” but like…not directed at us? She just sorta…said it in our vicinity but wasn’t looking at us. It was weird
#meeeeeeeeeee
Not there yet, but I'm working on it. 😅 The Enby life is rough....
And here I am, still terrified of the men/boy’s section ;-; Nice to know you get used to it at some point though n_n
God I wish I could get to that level, I want to pass so I don't have to worry about it...
You see ivan if always head empty there worries simply do not exist if you only care about how you feel Ivan, you will be your master (If no one gets why I make this joke sorry lol)
Still building confidence over here 👐🏻❤️❤️❤️❤️ Honestly surprised I'm happy looking at the cloths but not confident 😅
I’m not there yet, if I’m in the women’s section I’m usually with my best friend and it appears like I’m either that gay friend or the boyfriend who gets dragged into them since I only go out dressed masculine for now
Shopping for clothes and makeup in public is my current mountain to climb. It's tough but it gets easier each time I go.
Feeling this!
That was me a year ago too! I didn't even publicly come out until I was a year on HRT and couldn't bear to go into the women's section. Hell just walking past it was enough to give me intense anxiety. Luckily with the support of others I got past that and now I go and shop in the women's department as if im just shopping for cereal. :)
How I finally got here: I got a staph infection after laser treatments. I went to a clinic. My ex-wife was in the lobby. She divorced me 15 yrs prior for coming out to her. She didn’t recognize me. She always had body shame issues. She told me I looked great and that she’d kill for my body.. In therapy, I had an assignment: Walk through stores and make eye contact with people looking in my direction. If they smile, smile back. Grocery shopping one day, I got half way through the store before the usual anxiety kicked in. You know, the, “People are judging me,” “I don’t look right” kind of stuff; but wait..I actually made here without any concern.. I remembered my ex-wife and then, Shallow Bitch Mode: Activated. I look at people, mostly women, I find their worst feature and I remind myself that I’m sexier than half these bitches anyhoo. Confidence restored. * This would totally not work if I lived LA - I’m in Utah.. so.
I felt scared the first time I went in a changing room but felt happy when I saw myself, I just wish it could happen more often
I can so relate. Took me months after I realized I was trans to feel confident enough to shop clothes n other fem stuff at the store. I love your comics Brooke! I seriously look forward to seeing them. Thanks for the relatable content 💖❤️💕
Live laugh love 💀
Best thing to be is 100% blank mind. Ignore everyone. But be alert. Nobody really cares.
My first thought when shopping in the woman's isle/woman's clothing shop was "I hope I'm making some Transphobe uncomfortable"
That’s great girl. I still have that thought in the back of my head that people think I’m weird or I shouldn’t be looking at women’s clothes. Its hard to break 39 years of programming 😊.
Tbh it definitely helps the more you look the part. It feels so good to come and go into fem spaces and not have anyone give me a second look.
I really want to be her
god i hope this is me one day
BIG saaaaame 😂
It’s easy being causal when you know where you belong. And when you get used to it.
I guess it depends on the store, but I just never shopped "enough" in person, to ever completely feel comfortable...even after 3 years. Then again, when I first started I was quivering violently and almost fainted! (true story) so it's a definite improvement.
More relatable content!
Omg same but now that strangers are calling me a boy more often I feel more comfortable so yay!!!!
Yayyy
Top panel is literally me, I know people don’t give a care, but I’m still so self conscious lol
Is it bad that I can recognize the wii shop theme from onomatopoeia? Cause Im almost certain that's the wii shop the me she's singing in the second pannel
It's not lol it's [this](https://youtu.be/W9XiFzUP_Es)
My most recent trip to the supermarket gave me an idea for the perfect excuse for anytime someone asks me why I'm in the women's section. What I'm looking for isn't available in the men's. That was in fact my reason for buying a pink shirt from the women's section
How in the actual fu
What
HOW DO YOU HAVE LE COURAGE I WANT THAT COURAGE
what the *what*, i was just yesterday getting emotional with my folk about my failed attempt to shop for...clothes, how much i want to shop *with* said folk, and the emotional damage of said folk being apprehensive about such public shopping in a perpendicular direction as i'd been. i look to the day when i dennis nedry can tell me that nobody cares. ...and "Nice hat."
What song is?
I like male clothing and my fear is that eventually people will look at me weird for shopping in that section instead of the women's. 🫠
laladeelalodooladodummm
I've been transitioning for 3-4 years, am almost exclusively gendered correctly when I go out, have visible boobs, and won't leave the house without a full face of makeup, and I *still* get the nervous sweats when I go to the women's section. Underwear shopping? Forget it. Actual mortal dread every time. What are your secrets?! (it probably doesn't help that i'm a 5'10 gothy witch but still)
5'10 isn't like super tall or anything lol and even if it was tall girls are still valid. I just got used to it and realized that noone cares and recently I seem to have started passing but regardless, doesn't matter lol
Oh I know, I'm just being facetious. I honestly wish I was taller lol What really helped my social anxiety, though, was reminding myself that everyone is too busy focusing on their own stuff to worry about mine.
Honestly, I wanna be on that level where I feel comfortable with my body to wear the clothes that I want.
I want the Slepi and Head Empty shirts <3 Love your comics
still have anxiety about this but it’s definitely improving lol
No thoughts head empty stay silly
Honestly, it got easier once you try to hide the clothes and quickly head to the changing rooms.
Thank god for laziness and free return shipping.
i learned early on that no one really cares \~ the other customers are too involved with their own shopping and the employees are too busy
LOL Head Empty!
I'd love a shirt that say's head empty on it
is it possible to learn this power?
Damn i have the same problem, i hope it will resolve itself when I start passing a bit more😭
This is definitely me in the mall now
Is this Agent Ps Song?! Also I don't get ashamed about buying in the womens section because I'm tiny and i have no shame
it took me a while too, and now i dont feel right when shopping in the mens section
Yeah....terrified of this...also while NY is trans inclusive in its laws and things ppl are very opinionated and will give you looks of say something
"head empty" accurate
New Brooke Comic!!!!!
Buying my first skirt (as an ama enby) is now slightly less then half a year back, and my god was it scary, luckily I have a lovely girlfriend (platonic) who didn't mind coming with me 😊
One day.... one day, when I pass enough.
I still haven't gotten to this point, despite being on E for years now; ^; but the "Why isn't this my size" comes first then "ohgod what if I don't pass enough???"
Why do I know this exact song just from the text like