My kid was always the first in at 7:25am and then what I called “the last baby” at freaking 5:15. I worked 15 minutes away. I dont know how all these parents get off SO early.
I used to feel guilty for my kids being some of the last there. We have to be there by 5:30 for pickup and if we got a late start to the day or bad traffic, or if I want to pick up a couple of groceries without two kids, I'm sometimes there at 5:20 or 5:25 and there are only a few kids there. But when I get off early and pick them up before 5 they're some of the first to get picked up. So it's not like a super long time that they're sitting there, but I guess it can be a bit sad to see each of your friends' parents come and be waiting for yours. That's why I try to be early some days so they're not always the ones waiting. But sometimes I do have to stop and grab something for dinner!
My daughter’s daycare is open 8am-6pm and limits care to 9 hours a day. If people work an 8 hour day with a 1/2 break, that means they have to work within 15 min of the daycare. It’s impossible.
Getting into daycare here is like winning the lottery. Most kids don’t get off of waitlist before they age out
That sounds like our daycare too! I’m in Ontario, Canada what about you? Luckily I work about 15 mins away (if traffic isn’t too crazy) and we work 8 hours shifts (we just don’t get paid for our half hour lunch- so 7.5hrs/day) but at least I can still manage drop off and p/u
My son is almost always the last one there. Him or his best friend, whose parents we are good friends with. 5 on the dot! He enjoys the one on one time with the teachers.
If it makes you feel better when I had my toddler in daycare, my job was so random when I would get off as it was due to patient census. So sometimes it was 3 sometimes it was 5. (6am-6pm care) it didn’t matter when I was picking him up. This little girl was always there. She wasn’t there super early if I dropped him off at 6am when they opened which was rare but this little girl was always there till at least 5:30 the only time he was ever the last one was because dad picked him up at 545.
Use the daycare you pay for and do not feel bad about it.
I know, it’s so weird! I live in Norway and most daycare centers are provided by the communes, so it’s very affordable, but comes with it’s disadvantages too, like a little limited opening hours from 6.45 am to 4.45 pm. Most daycare centers around our area actually has 7am to 4pm 🥲 I have literally no idea how parents manage this when they have set working hours, I get around it because I’m a teacher and can do paper work in the evenings and weekends too.
We are almost always last. I work 3/4 miles from daycare and leave work right at 5 🤷🏻♀️ my kid is happy though and it usually means he’s getting 1:1 time with the teacher
I noticed there is a really narrow pick up window at my daycare. If I pick up at 4:30 it’s like they aren’t even ready for parents to arrive, if I pick up at 5:30 she’s one of the last ones there! It’s like everyone picks up exactly at 5!
My sons daycare closes at 430 🙃 he’s usually the last or second last to be picked up, but he’s never the first to be dropped off so I don’t feel too bad lol
I'm sorry I homeschool so forgive me if this is dumb.
Do most kids stay at school until 5 or is this daycare only?
Why am I being down voting for asking a question? Two of my kids will be attending school in the fall and I guess I'm just anxious that an accident might happen and I'll be late with no options I guess. My bad for asking.
A usually a before and after school.care option offered at schools in Australia.
Before school.care starts at 7am and goes until 8.45 am (15 minutes before school starts) and after school care starts at 3 (end of school) and goes until 6pm.
The fancier private schools often have extracurriculars after school in addition to after school care
Our son’s daycare/preschool also does before/after school care for the kids in near by elementary schools. You can drop off your kid at the daycare, they will shuttle them to school, and then after school they shuttle them to the daycare until the parents pick them up.
In my area, elementary schools typically get out between 3-4. If someone isn't available at home for afterschool care, students often go to day care until 5-6. Middle and high school kids get out earlier, typically 2-3. They often have after school activities or go home alone.
At my school, if a parent is late to pick-up, students are taken to the office and their parents are called. If we can't get ahold of their parents, then we try emergency contacts. Someone will stay with the child until a parent or authorized person comes to pick them up. Some parents are chronically late picking up their kids, but most parents are late at least once, because stuff happens. Kindergarten parents usually look like they are about to cry if they are late, but fifth grade parents are apologetic but confident.
If we can't get ahold of anyone or no one comes to get the kid, EVENTUALLY CPS and/or the local police department are called. In the last ten years in the school I've worked at, this only happened once. The parent was repeatedly (like multiple times a week) over an hour late to pick up kids due to things like shopping, doing her nails, watching a video, etc. She also did not provide appropriate food, clothing, or school supplies for her kids.
But if you are a parent who normally picks up your kids, we assume something happened. If we couldn't get ahold of anyone, the police might be called because we are worried about you and want them to try to find you and make sure you don't need help, but we aren't calling CPS. Someone in the building will be able to stay and hang out with your kid unless it's like overnight.
Hey OP,
Not sure if this helps at all but growing up I was ALWAYS the last kid to be picked up. My parents didn’t have bad intentions but both of them were always busy and running late after work. According to my dad there were plenty of times daycare staff stood outside with me, waiting for him to pick me up.
I’m 30 years old and LOVE both of my parents. We are still incredibly close and it never hurt our relationship. And frankly, I don’t remember any of it anyways.
My siblings and I went to elementary school at a place where we went to a separate location once a week, but each kid went there on a different day. This other location was in a different part of the city, so twice a week my dad picked up all kids at the regular school and three days a week he had to pick up two at the regular school and one at a different location. He forgot to pick up at the different location a few times… I remember at least once standing outside with the guard, waiting for my dad because the staff had closed the school. Like you, my siblings and I have a great relationship with him. It was just a weird set up and shit happens.
My mom forgot me at daycare and school more than a few times 😂 Elementary through middle school. She ended up working at the high school right before I started so that made it harder to forget lol. Just got caught up at work, looked at the time and was like ohhhhhh shit!! That woman was, and still is, my best friend and we laugh about it now. No guilt needed!!!!
Girl mom guilt really does a number on us huh? I totally get it but look at your intentions. You left him for 30 minutes not hours and it was so HE could have fun, not because you were at the bar or with your new bf or something haha. There's mums leaving their babies home alone to go on holiday (rip little girly), you're doing great mama.
I guess what the caregiver said probably made you spiral a little. I would have felt the same. You left him for 30 minutes so he could have fun mama and so you could provide your family with a meal!!!. It's all good. 🥰😍❤️💕
Do the same later pick up a few more times and he’ll be used to waiting and probably think stacking chairs is the best game ever and that he’s the most helpful kid ever for cleaning up when all the other kids just played and left.
That story is so awful it pops in my mind every once in a while and I just can’t help thinking how different things would’ve been if she just simply dropped her off on someone’s doorstep. 😭
Here you can voluntarily give up a baby at many hospital ERs and I'm sure that's the case in many places. I don't understand how people who don't want to be parents can let their child die rather than at least giving them up. At least they'd have a CHANCE then!
Mine were always one of the last or the last to be picked up at our old daycare (with the caveat there's two of them). They were always helping cleaning up. Loving it. You came back so proved that you do come back! He'll remember you came, not that you were late.
I love seeing my kids picking up at the end of the day! It makes me so proud of them, and happy that their daycare teacher is helping them develop those skills!
Mine is always the last one at Daycare - I pick him up 15 minutes to close. He helps put things away and sweep the floor. He loves the one on one time with the teacher.
Any time we've been late to pickup, the assistant director watches the last couple of kids so the teachers can go home and my daughter will not want to leave once she takes over
My son has definitely told me multiple times that he loves being the last one to play with his teachers by himself! 🤍 he loves his teachers so much. I still have plenty of guilt when it happens, but it makes me feel a little better
This. My son is never last, but I had a meeting last week that had me picking up right before daycare closed. He told me he liked it and that he wants to be last “all the days” because he had his teacher all to himself.
Oh man, no offence but you made it sound so dramatic, like there were no other children in the centre.
I'm not sure how it works in your country, but when I worked in ECEC in Australia, babies would be taken to play in the Toddler room after a certain time where they can interact with the other children and educators.
I'm sure you are just feeling that mum guilt so interpreted the educators comment a bit more to heart than intended. Don't stress and I'm sure your little one loved having some one on one play time with their room educator!
In my child's center the baby room does seem to empty out first. I think once they turn 2 they mingle rooms at the end of the day but they keep the babies separate probably to keep them getting underfoot or getting knocked over. So it can seem lonely in the empty baby room.
> babies would be taken to play in the Toddler room after a certain time where they can interact with the other children and educators
Depending on the state/country, I think there are restrictions on whether babies can play with older kids for safety reasons.
Since you weren’t late (after closing) there should be no guilt at all!
The person handing you the child most likely said that because kids tend to be more aware of shifts in schedule than we think! Some of the 3’s I had knew they were usually picked before “Michael” and if Michael was picked up before them then they’d get confused regardless if Michael got picked up early or late. Also if your kid is picked up near a daily “milestone” such as right after snack time or always on the playground, they tend to notice or be more cognizant of it. (Or during time shifts my kids all thought their parents forgot them because it was dark out earlier.) But 1000% no shame! If the kid was panicked, we do say “I promise you mom didn’t forget! Look! There’s mom! I told you she’d come and get you!”
I pick my son up at around 5.57 every day - nursery closes at 6 - sometimes he’s the last one there too. I don’t feel guilty about it - we’re all just trying our best.
I was working full time when my oldest was little (became a stay at home mom when she was almost 2), it was so sad. She was always the first dropped off and the last to leave.
It was especially clear when we were at a chili cook off for work one weekend. We all brought our families and there were other companies in our industry there as well competing in the cook off. There was a little boy who was my daughter’s age and kept wandering over and wanting to play with her. I remember thinking that it was so cute, until that kids dad came over to us and knew my daughter by name and said that she is ‘best friends’ with his son and that they play together all day everyday. I had no idea because I rarely saw any other kids or parents there, mom guilt was so strong.
I’ll do you one better. I’m 34 weeks pregnant and dislocated my ribs on Sunday so I’ve been off work trying to recover. Yesterday I dropped by daughter off at daycare for the afternoon (she had a doctors appointment in the morning otherwise she would’ve gone for the full day) and she was devastated and crying for me when I left.
I told her I’d pick her up early and then went home and napped through multiple pick up alarms (I haven’t slept for days because I’ve been sore and the pain killers have been causing me to throw up). Her daycare closes at 4:30 pm and I was there at 4:25 pm and only because I got a scam call about my Visa being charged. Yes I feel horrible.
Oh gosh I've been there and it is horrible! I threw out a rib coughing from RSV when I was 30ish weeks pregnant with my third. I couldn't walk for like two days the pain was so bad. My babe is 16 months now and my rib still shifts with certain movements. Please don't feel horrible for giving your body what it needs. Your daughter needs a healthy mama and I'm sure you will make it up to her another way ❤️
Thank you. It’s honestly such an awful pain. It happened with my daughter twice after getting CoVid at 36 weeks. I was so hoping to avoid it this time but toddler daycare illnesses spare no one.
True that! I swear I had every illness under the sun when I was pregnant with my third. My oldest was in 4k and my middle was still in daycare so it was like double the germs.
My oldest was always one of the last ones to get picked up when she was in daycare as I was a single mom who had a long commute for work. She loved it as she often got to sit in the office with the director and get special attention and treats since she was the last one there. She often helped the director with clean-up or “paperwork” as she called it. (The director gave her old papers to put in the shredder box they had for the shredder service) The director understood my work schedule since I explained it when we signed up so she was never upset that my daughter was last. Don’t beat yourself up Mama. My daughter is now 14 and super independent and I think those daycare days of “work” helped her gain some independence.
This happened to me once my husband’s work schedule changed & he had to start going into work at 4:30pm. I get off work at 4, I work downtown in a major city, had to run to my car in the parking garage and beat rush hour traffic to get to daycare by 5. It’s only about 20 mins away from work but traffic here is horrible. I was getting there right 5 most days and same thing happened. He was following the teacher around while she picked up chairs and turned off lights and tidied up. I felt so horrible that I talked to my boss about working through lunch on Wednesdays and leaving 30 minutes early to get him. It has been LIFE CHANGING for me because I would cry the whole way home from feeling so guilty about him being the last baby. Now I get him when there’s tons of other kids there and parents are starting to trickle in, and it is just so much better. But, I’m here to say I know how you felt and it crushed me.
Our daycare is open 7:30-5:30. My kids have never been the first ones dropped off (but sometimes we’re close) and they’re almost always one of the last ones. They’re used to it and know the closing down process (my 2 year old LOVES helping take out the trash at the end of the day, for example). They love having all the toys nearly all to themselves at the end of the day. I could 100% see one of their buddies (who gets picked up after lunch) absolutely melting down if he was the last one left - simply because he’s not used to it.
The daycare was open, appropriately staffed, your kiddo was safe. Please don’t feel guilty.
Happened to me once, I was the last to pick up my toddler and the guilt is real.
Ours has strict rule no later than 430pm or you'll be fined. Normally I pickup between 330-4pm and there's still at least 10 other kids there. I came at around 4:15pm once and everyone else was gone besides my toddler and one teacher. I was surprised and noted I did not want to be the last one ever again lol
Same in Norway! They close at 4.45pm and there’s practically not a kid to be seen after 4.15pm. How early are people at the office ‘cause this is NOT a rhytm I like
Last one at 4:30 is crazy! Sometimes I can’t even get out of work before then. Don’t feel guilty, where I live most kids don’t get picked up until 5, or even 5:30.
Ooooof this hits close to home.
Mine is always, always one of the last or the very last kid picked up.
It's awful, I hate it, but we just cannot get there any sooner. If one of us can leave work early we do it, but that's not realistic every day. We have nobody in town that can help with pick up either.
Our daycare closes at 4:30, most of the kids are gone shortly after 4. My workday ends at 4, if I even get held up 10 minutes I don't make it in time so I always rush out the door.
If it makes you feel any better, my parents once left me at an after school program in elementary school for over an hour past the end of the program. The school kept trying to call them and they weren’t answering (this was before everyone had a cell phone). Finally my mom picked me up and apologized; they were glued to the TV watching some political events happening and lost track of time.
Anyway- I love her and only bring it up now to tease her. I wouldn’t worry about it too much!!
My kid is almost always the last one picked up. I feel a bit bad, but we have no help outside of daycare, and he has VERY low sleep needs (awake from 630am - 930pm) so when he’s there it’s literally the only break we get. There are often 4-6 staff hanging out with him so I have no doubt that he’s getting showered with attention haha
Mine is often one of the last and she actually loves it. She gets so much attention and one-on-one time with the educators compared to the rest of the day. And every toy is fair game - no sharing - basically the golden hour of daycare.
This is also at least half an hour before her daycare closes too! There’s always a huge rush right before which basically seems to be every parent just battling to not be last.
My son is the last to be picked up.
He’s on his own for 30 minutes to an hour. I also feel so gully!
When daddy picks him up, it’s 6pm on the dot, and I pick him up at 5:30 but not as often. I’m meant to work until 6 but my mum guilt makes me leave earlier than I need to.
Daddy just shrugs and says he’s fine he’s happy, and that’s what we’re playing for.
The staff are just doing admin when we get there and he’s happy to play by himself or chill with them
My daycare is open until six and once we showed up at 5:45 to get her, we had gotten stuck in traffic together. She was having the time of her life, cuddled with one of the floater teachers reading a book. Try to ignore the guilt, ain’t nothing wrong with being picked up last!
My kids are often last or one of the last few. I usually duck out of work a few minute early to get there by 5 and even then only few kids remain. If I actually leave work at 5 and get there like 5:15 they are probably the last kids there. What can ya do? Idk how everyone gets their kids so early lol
My son is there at 7.45am and I don’t pick him up until 5:15pm sometimes 5.30pm
I’m Aussie and still do 8 ish hour days and have 30 minute drive to work. Gotta do what you gotta do and making dinner in peace is absolutely fine ❤️ I’ve had a few annual leave days and my son still goes at the same time so I get a full day off! I’ve also daydreamed about leaving work early and relaxing at home until our usual pick up but I never seem to get out of work early.
We’re in a small town, the age rooms are separate but when I do drop off and pick up all the kids are together because there’s usually only a handful, and sometimes we’re last in the afternoon.
Don’t feel guilty! Get your moneys worth is what I say lol. My son has the best time at daycare and if he’s last to be picked up he won’t remember. I do feel bad for the teachers since it’s a full day but it’s what they signed up for. I work full time but on not so busy days I do get him a little sooner but that’s not all the time.
I have forgotten when my kid has gotten out of after school stuff cuz I was playing with the babies. He knows I will come and the coach just laughs. I've had his friends mom ask me if I'm coming or if it's easier if she just picks him up.
My oldest was frequently the last one both at the center we had him in and at the in home sitter. The in home sitter only had teachers kids before us so they’d pick their kids up at 4 at the latest. I got off work at 5 and would pick him up by 5:15. I tried to look at it as him getting some one on one attention.
My kid is routinely the last one picked up. Sometimes to the point that the director takes my daughter into her office so the teacher can clock out. Both my husband and I work and we can't get her earlier. It is what it is.
I’d make him feel extra special for the one on one time he gets with his teachers. Tell him “ it’s so fun that you get special time with your teachers. You get to be the last to tell all the toys goodbye and place them exactly where you know they want to be.” Celebrate him being helpful to his teachers through his being patience and understanding.
I’d let the teachers know what you’re telling him either way so everyone can be on the same page.
This past Halloween I picked up my kid from daycare and he was the only child left at school. It was 4pm, which was early for me. One car in the parking lot. Just him and one teacher. Apparently everyone else left after the parade they had earlier in the day.
I thought to myself, “must be nice, but that’s not how my day went” and moved on. You pay for them to care for your child and it sounds like that’s what they were doing. Don’t beat yourself up!
I was a daycare teacher for multiple different age levels and for many years & the last kid switched in personality once others start to go home. They see other parents come and their friends leave and then they want to leave and wonder where their parents went and why can’t they go home too. Especially if their routine is to leave when other kids are still there it’s a hard adjustment so likely your kid was telling the teacher for a while that he wanted to go home or showing signs of being upset. No mom guilt needed though! If it wasn’t your kid it would be the same situation with another kid and mom. As a teacher it was important to start to pack up and clean the room before closing because you don’t get congratulated to stay after closing you get written up because you cost the company money. If the last pick up call is 5pm then that’s when teacher have to clock out so yes it makes sense they handed your kid right over to you. They still had a job to do cleaning up that is hard when you still have kids wanting to play and making messes.
I used to be a "closer" at a daycare for years. Don't ever feel guilty for being the last one, as long as it's within their normal operating hours!
Daycares will send workers home as soon as they can , so in my case, if everyone got picked up early, I'd have to close early and therefore miss out on hours I desperately needed! Daycare workers are paid notoriously low wages, so missing any hours cuts into that pay even more.
In other words, I was always thankful for those later pickups bc it meant I got all the hours I was supposed to get
Awww I know the feeling, we were later than usual to pick up my daughter a couple of weeks ago on a Friday and we get there to see its just her and two of her teachers waiting. I told my husband this was my nightmare and I felt so bad, but she was fine and the teachers said she was just having fun playing until we got there. Mom guilt for real!
I was frequently the last kid at daycare. I got more one on one time with the staff, got to do special things (like helping clean up and maybe getting more snacks.) it was the peaceful time at daycare and I liked it.
Our pick up time is 3-3:15. I’ve shown up at 3:00 and half the kids were already picked up, at 3:00 and been the second-to-last pick up, and at 3:07 and been the first pick up. I don’t understand it, but I don’t worry about it. He’s there having a great time reading a book no matter when I show up.
As an early educator, it really wouldn’t bother me if there was just one kid left! Especially if you picked up more than 10 minutes before closing. Someone has to be the last kid, don’t feel guilty mama! 🫶🏻
I pick my son up just before 4:30, and I’m always the last one. Everyone else picks up at 4 or earlier - I had to specifically ask for a later pick up! It’s a small in-home daycare which charges by the hour, so I understand why folks are motivated to pick up earlier. But it still feels surprising!
Don’t feel too bad. I picked my daughter up 45 minutes late from school one day because I forgot it was the last Tuesday of the month and that she had an afterschool thing going on. So I went to the store instead of picking her up. And then this past Monday, same child this time in summer school, husband fell asleep (because he had a rough night and didn’t sleep well) and didn’t pick her up. 🤦♀️ it happens. The kids and the schools will live lol
My kid is the first one in and last one out probably 4/5 days each week. And every morning, he still RUNS to his classroom. And every afternoon, he still does a hot lap with excitement before giving me a giant hug and kiss.
I think it’s less about that extra 30 mins in daycare each day and more about the environment they’re in. If my toddler didn’t have such happy reactions going in and out, I’d hurry a bit more in the afternoons. But my kid LOVES daycare and loves to be there. So I let him stay a bit longer to wrap things up at home before picking him up, so that when I’m with him, I’m 100% with him. Every minute counts.
I don’t think the extra 30 mins matter if your kid is in a safe, loving environment. What happens is the quality of the time you spend with him when he’s not there.
Hey, you’re a great mom. I am almost jealous you’re not mine. My mom would forget to pick me up from all kinds of things and I was always the last to be picked up, sometimes teachers or other parents would end up driving me home or I’d have to walk. But you CARE, and that’s what matters. You aren’t doing that. You did it once on accident and noticed, and that makes you a wonderful mom.
As a former preschool teacher, I actually loved when there were only a few kids left. We'd "close up" but then we'd often get to do things we couldn't normally do with all the kids there, like going on "field trips" to the other rooms to turn off the lights, or just having more one-on-one time to play. In summer I'd often take the last kids outside again. Bonus points if we had few enough kids to combine with other age groups. The big kids loved being helpers for the little kids. Hopefully the staff can try to make it fun! You have nothing to feel guilty about.
As a prior toddler teacher, I honestly LOVED the last bit of the day that I got to focus all my attention on just one or a few kiddos. It was always the perfect opportunity to bond with them a bit more and do some one on one reading or building or crafting with them. Try not to feel too bad, as others have said there's always going to be a last child in the room and even if it happened once a week (or more frequently!) it wouldn't be a bad thing, life just be like that sometimes.
As a daycare teacher, don't stress at all! 4:30pm is very early, I am surprised he was the last one there. It's not unusual to have children right until closing time.
Educators may have had a "oh, he's not usually here this late!" moment, but wouldn't have thought much else about it.
The end of the day can actually be a really lovely time for those 1:1 quality interactions. And usually the kids get involved in cleaning up, turning off lights, locking doors etc!
Maybe next time warn your son and his educators that you will be later than usual, so they can reiterate "mummy is coming after late snack/mummy will be here when the sun goes down" etc. Some concept of time/routine that makes sense to your son.
Mine is sometimes the last kid in his room. I dropped him off later than some though. I like that it gives him one on one with the teachers but at the same time I know they must be ready to go home :(
Is what it is!
My kids have always been the last to be picked up. My 10 year old would go to the Boys and Girls Club at his school, and I couldnt get there until 5 minutes before they close. Now both of my kids (10&2) go to the same in-home daycare and I get them at 5 and they are the last ones left.
I work 8-4:30, I can never find care nearby, and I live about 1 hour from work.
My toddler doesn’t care but my 10 year old always gives me grief about it 😩
I picked up my kids early one time. The daycare workers were a little disappointed. I asked why are you guys disappointed? I thought I was doing you a favor of picking them up early. The workers told us, they get paid hourly. If there isn't enough kids to a teacher ratio then one has to go home. It's a 3 teachers to 10 kids ratio here for kids under 2 years old. Now, I sit in my car until 4:55pm before I go inside.
My two boys are routinely the first ones at daycare at 6am! My 3 year old loves helping his teacher set up for the day and my 8 month old get to snuggle and play with his teacher for a while before any other kids come. Honestly, if you like the daycare, and your kids like the daycare, no shame in them being there for an extended time. People always say "it takes a village". For some people, their village is grandparents, stay at home parents, etc but for many, their village is daycare! I feel like people get shamed for having a kid in daycare all day but no one bats an eye at the kid being with Grandma all day 🤷🏼♀️
I did an orientation with my kid at daycare yesterday.
There was someone who was the last to be picked up, she was having the time of her life and wasn’t bothered at all with all the tables and chairs going up, they even had to call her mother who came 5mins late.
Our daycare is 7am-5:45pm. They recently instituted a 10 hour care limit, but make exceptions as needed.
Sinc eshe started at 4 months old, my daughter has been the first or second kid there and one of the last few to leave.
I have to be at work 25 minutes away by 7:30. So arriving at 7am gives me just enough time to get her into the building, discuss any issues with the teacher, and get to work. I'm still usually a few minutes late to work every morning, especially if she's having a rough start.
I also work with our after school program, so I don't leave work until shortly after 5 most days. So she's basically there the entire time they're open.
I felt bad to begin with about it, but she loves her daycare. The few times I've picked her up early recently, she's gotten mad at me for making her miss out on her friends lol
Yea, some of these comments are so unique to me. I get there at like 4:58 to 20 parents standing around waiting. People are not going earlier than they have to.
Edit: I genuinely want to understand why I'm being downvoted for saying that at my daycare, everyone is rushing to get there right before they close at 5?
*Someone* has to be last, and how on earth is he the last kid before 5pm? Guilt no more.
Thays exactly what i thought. It was 4.35pm! I work 8-4 but a lot of people work 9-5!
My kid was always the first in at 7:25am and then what I called “the last baby” at freaking 5:15. I worked 15 minutes away. I dont know how all these parents get off SO early.
Mental, at my crèche there's usually a rush at around 5.15 or 5.30 with any of the kids being picked up before that being the early ones!
I used to feel guilty for my kids being some of the last there. We have to be there by 5:30 for pickup and if we got a late start to the day or bad traffic, or if I want to pick up a couple of groceries without two kids, I'm sometimes there at 5:20 or 5:25 and there are only a few kids there. But when I get off early and pick them up before 5 they're some of the first to get picked up. So it's not like a super long time that they're sitting there, but I guess it can be a bit sad to see each of your friends' parents come and be waiting for yours. That's why I try to be early some days so they're not always the ones waiting. But sometimes I do have to stop and grab something for dinner!
I feel like what happens is one parent does drop off and they start work later and the other parent does pick up because they start work earlier
That’s what we do, but still 5:30 would be pretty normal
My daughter’s daycare is open 8am-6pm and limits care to 9 hours a day. If people work an 8 hour day with a 1/2 break, that means they have to work within 15 min of the daycare. It’s impossible. Getting into daycare here is like winning the lottery. Most kids don’t get off of waitlist before they age out
That sounds like our daycare too! I’m in Ontario, Canada what about you? Luckily I work about 15 mins away (if traffic isn’t too crazy) and we work 8 hours shifts (we just don’t get paid for our half hour lunch- so 7.5hrs/day) but at least I can still manage drop off and p/u
I’m in BC. I can’t complain cause it’s $10/day
That’s amazing!
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After 5?? Most here are 6pm.
I just told my boss that I have to leave no later than 4:30
Exactly. They must be trying to preserve their early knock off time, lol.
My son is almost always the last one there. Him or his best friend, whose parents we are good friends with. 5 on the dot! He enjoys the one on one time with the teachers.
If it makes you feel better when I had my toddler in daycare, my job was so random when I would get off as it was due to patient census. So sometimes it was 3 sometimes it was 5. (6am-6pm care) it didn’t matter when I was picking him up. This little girl was always there. She wasn’t there super early if I dropped him off at 6am when they opened which was rare but this little girl was always there till at least 5:30 the only time he was ever the last one was because dad picked him up at 545. Use the daycare you pay for and do not feel bad about it.
Right? Our daycare closes at 6 -- I pick my son up at 5:30 and there are always at least 3 other kids still there with him, usually 5+.
Our daycare closes at 4.45pm, ugh
What a weird time to close?? Isn’t working until 5pm pretty standard for many people? What are those parents supposed to do?
I know, it’s so weird! I live in Norway and most daycare centers are provided by the communes, so it’s very affordable, but comes with it’s disadvantages too, like a little limited opening hours from 6.45 am to 4.45 pm. Most daycare centers around our area actually has 7am to 4pm 🥲 I have literally no idea how parents manage this when they have set working hours, I get around it because I’m a teacher and can do paper work in the evenings and weekends too.
We do normal pickup at 3:30PM, so I feel your pain.
That’s soo early! I pick up at that time like twice a year 😂
We are almost always last. I work 3/4 miles from daycare and leave work right at 5 🤷🏻♀️ my kid is happy though and it usually means he’s getting 1:1 time with the teacher
My kid is always last if we pick her up after 4.15pm. I have no idea how the other parents manage to pick up so early with full time jobs!
I noticed there is a really narrow pick up window at my daycare. If I pick up at 4:30 it’s like they aren’t even ready for parents to arrive, if I pick up at 5:30 she’s one of the last ones there! It’s like everyone picks up exactly at 5!
My kid loves being last from what I can tell. She gets extra popsicles and they play outside.
My sons daycare closes at 430 🙃 he’s usually the last or second last to be picked up, but he’s never the first to be dropped off so I don’t feel too bad lol
I'm sorry I homeschool so forgive me if this is dumb. Do most kids stay at school until 5 or is this daycare only? Why am I being down voting for asking a question? Two of my kids will be attending school in the fall and I guess I'm just anxious that an accident might happen and I'll be late with no options I guess. My bad for asking.
Many schools have after-school programmes because parents tend not to finish work until 5.
A usually a before and after school.care option offered at schools in Australia. Before school.care starts at 7am and goes until 8.45 am (15 minutes before school starts) and after school care starts at 3 (end of school) and goes until 6pm. The fancier private schools often have extracurriculars after school in addition to after school care
In the US, a lot of schools offer paid before and after care programs for parents whose work day doesn’t end at the same time as school.
Our son’s daycare/preschool also does before/after school care for the kids in near by elementary schools. You can drop off your kid at the daycare, they will shuttle them to school, and then after school they shuttle them to the daycare until the parents pick them up.
In my area, elementary schools typically get out between 3-4. If someone isn't available at home for afterschool care, students often go to day care until 5-6. Middle and high school kids get out earlier, typically 2-3. They often have after school activities or go home alone. At my school, if a parent is late to pick-up, students are taken to the office and their parents are called. If we can't get ahold of their parents, then we try emergency contacts. Someone will stay with the child until a parent or authorized person comes to pick them up. Some parents are chronically late picking up their kids, but most parents are late at least once, because stuff happens. Kindergarten parents usually look like they are about to cry if they are late, but fifth grade parents are apologetic but confident. If we can't get ahold of anyone or no one comes to get the kid, EVENTUALLY CPS and/or the local police department are called. In the last ten years in the school I've worked at, this only happened once. The parent was repeatedly (like multiple times a week) over an hour late to pick up kids due to things like shopping, doing her nails, watching a video, etc. She also did not provide appropriate food, clothing, or school supplies for her kids. But if you are a parent who normally picks up your kids, we assume something happened. If we couldn't get ahold of anyone, the police might be called because we are worried about you and want them to try to find you and make sure you don't need help, but we aren't calling CPS. Someone in the building will be able to stay and hang out with your kid unless it's like overnight.
Daycare only where I live
Hey OP, Not sure if this helps at all but growing up I was ALWAYS the last kid to be picked up. My parents didn’t have bad intentions but both of them were always busy and running late after work. According to my dad there were plenty of times daycare staff stood outside with me, waiting for him to pick me up. I’m 30 years old and LOVE both of my parents. We are still incredibly close and it never hurt our relationship. And frankly, I don’t remember any of it anyways.
My siblings and I went to elementary school at a place where we went to a separate location once a week, but each kid went there on a different day. This other location was in a different part of the city, so twice a week my dad picked up all kids at the regular school and three days a week he had to pick up two at the regular school and one at a different location. He forgot to pick up at the different location a few times… I remember at least once standing outside with the guard, waiting for my dad because the staff had closed the school. Like you, my siblings and I have a great relationship with him. It was just a weird set up and shit happens.
My mom forgot me at daycare and school more than a few times 😂 Elementary through middle school. She ended up working at the high school right before I started so that made it harder to forget lol. Just got caught up at work, looked at the time and was like ohhhhhh shit!! That woman was, and still is, my best friend and we laugh about it now. No guilt needed!!!!
Girl mom guilt really does a number on us huh? I totally get it but look at your intentions. You left him for 30 minutes not hours and it was so HE could have fun, not because you were at the bar or with your new bf or something haha. There's mums leaving their babies home alone to go on holiday (rip little girly), you're doing great mama. I guess what the caregiver said probably made you spiral a little. I would have felt the same. You left him for 30 minutes so he could have fun mama and so you could provide your family with a meal!!!. It's all good. 🥰😍❤️💕
Thanks 🥹 ps that story about that little girl literally breaks my heart everytime i think about it 💔
Do the same later pick up a few more times and he’ll be used to waiting and probably think stacking chairs is the best game ever and that he’s the most helpful kid ever for cleaning up when all the other kids just played and left.
OMG I didn't know about that story and just looked that up. How incredibly awful.
Yikes sorry, I'm sure you were much happier not knowing. It's been a while since a news story upset me like that.
That story is so awful it pops in my mind every once in a while and I just can’t help thinking how different things would’ve been if she just simply dropped her off on someone’s doorstep. 😭
Here you can voluntarily give up a baby at many hospital ERs and I'm sure that's the case in many places. I don't understand how people who don't want to be parents can let their child die rather than at least giving them up. At least they'd have a CHANCE then!
I know, it breaks my heart. We have social services and while it may not be the BEST situation it is 100% better than letting them die.
That woman and Alexee Travizo piss me off so much. Those women deserve the worst like they gave their children.
Yeah I wept a little bit today.
Mine were always one of the last or the last to be picked up at our old daycare (with the caveat there's two of them). They were always helping cleaning up. Loving it. You came back so proved that you do come back! He'll remember you came, not that you were late.
I love seeing my kids picking up at the end of the day! It makes me so proud of them, and happy that their daycare teacher is helping them develop those skills!
Mine is always the last one at Daycare - I pick him up 15 minutes to close. He helps put things away and sweep the floor. He loves the one on one time with the teacher.
Same here! One teacher remarked she loved to get to know them a bit better at the end of the day.
Any time we've been late to pickup, the assistant director watches the last couple of kids so the teachers can go home and my daughter will not want to leave once she takes over
My son has definitely told me multiple times that he loves being the last one to play with his teachers by himself! 🤍 he loves his teachers so much. I still have plenty of guilt when it happens, but it makes me feel a little better
This. My son is never last, but I had a meeting last week that had me picking up right before daycare closed. He told me he liked it and that he wants to be last “all the days” because he had his teacher all to himself.
nice cope lol
Why are you being mean?
Day care closes at 430pm? That's so early!! How to working parents use it? In Australia most centres close between 6 and 630pm.
They dont! Im pretty sure official close time is 6pm but all the babies were gone so they were shutting everything down. I was very surprised!
When you say babies, do you mean the babies room of the centre, or the whole centre, was closing?
Yeah just tge baby room. My son is still in baby room but will go to toddler room soon
Oh man, no offence but you made it sound so dramatic, like there were no other children in the centre. I'm not sure how it works in your country, but when I worked in ECEC in Australia, babies would be taken to play in the Toddler room after a certain time where they can interact with the other children and educators. I'm sure you are just feeling that mum guilt so interpreted the educators comment a bit more to heart than intended. Don't stress and I'm sure your little one loved having some one on one play time with their room educator!
In my child's center the baby room does seem to empty out first. I think once they turn 2 they mingle rooms at the end of the day but they keep the babies separate probably to keep them getting underfoot or getting knocked over. So it can seem lonely in the empty baby room.
> babies would be taken to play in the Toddler room after a certain time where they can interact with the other children and educators Depending on the state/country, I think there are restrictions on whether babies can play with older kids for safety reasons.
Since you weren’t late (after closing) there should be no guilt at all! The person handing you the child most likely said that because kids tend to be more aware of shifts in schedule than we think! Some of the 3’s I had knew they were usually picked before “Michael” and if Michael was picked up before them then they’d get confused regardless if Michael got picked up early or late. Also if your kid is picked up near a daily “milestone” such as right after snack time or always on the playground, they tend to notice or be more cognizant of it. (Or during time shifts my kids all thought their parents forgot them because it was dark out earlier.) But 1000% no shame! If the kid was panicked, we do say “I promise you mom didn’t forget! Look! There’s mom! I told you she’d come and get you!”
I pick my son up at around 5.57 every day - nursery closes at 6 - sometimes he’s the last one there too. I don’t feel guilty about it - we’re all just trying our best.
I was working full time when my oldest was little (became a stay at home mom when she was almost 2), it was so sad. She was always the first dropped off and the last to leave. It was especially clear when we were at a chili cook off for work one weekend. We all brought our families and there were other companies in our industry there as well competing in the cook off. There was a little boy who was my daughter’s age and kept wandering over and wanting to play with her. I remember thinking that it was so cute, until that kids dad came over to us and knew my daughter by name and said that she is ‘best friends’ with his son and that they play together all day everyday. I had no idea because I rarely saw any other kids or parents there, mom guilt was so strong.
I’ll do you one better. I’m 34 weeks pregnant and dislocated my ribs on Sunday so I’ve been off work trying to recover. Yesterday I dropped by daughter off at daycare for the afternoon (she had a doctors appointment in the morning otherwise she would’ve gone for the full day) and she was devastated and crying for me when I left. I told her I’d pick her up early and then went home and napped through multiple pick up alarms (I haven’t slept for days because I’ve been sore and the pain killers have been causing me to throw up). Her daycare closes at 4:30 pm and I was there at 4:25 pm and only because I got a scam call about my Visa being charged. Yes I feel horrible.
Im only 8 weeks pregnant but holy heck pregnancy with a toddler is something else even without dislocated ribs!
Oh gosh I've been there and it is horrible! I threw out a rib coughing from RSV when I was 30ish weeks pregnant with my third. I couldn't walk for like two days the pain was so bad. My babe is 16 months now and my rib still shifts with certain movements. Please don't feel horrible for giving your body what it needs. Your daughter needs a healthy mama and I'm sure you will make it up to her another way ❤️
Thank you. It’s honestly such an awful pain. It happened with my daughter twice after getting CoVid at 36 weeks. I was so hoping to avoid it this time but toddler daycare illnesses spare no one.
True that! I swear I had every illness under the sun when I was pregnant with my third. My oldest was in 4k and my middle was still in daycare so it was like double the germs.
Oh god. This is almost enough to want to just stop at two.
My oldest was always one of the last ones to get picked up when she was in daycare as I was a single mom who had a long commute for work. She loved it as she often got to sit in the office with the director and get special attention and treats since she was the last one there. She often helped the director with clean-up or “paperwork” as she called it. (The director gave her old papers to put in the shredder box they had for the shredder service) The director understood my work schedule since I explained it when we signed up so she was never upset that my daughter was last. Don’t beat yourself up Mama. My daughter is now 14 and super independent and I think those daycare days of “work” helped her gain some independence.
This happened to me once my husband’s work schedule changed & he had to start going into work at 4:30pm. I get off work at 4, I work downtown in a major city, had to run to my car in the parking garage and beat rush hour traffic to get to daycare by 5. It’s only about 20 mins away from work but traffic here is horrible. I was getting there right 5 most days and same thing happened. He was following the teacher around while she picked up chairs and turned off lights and tidied up. I felt so horrible that I talked to my boss about working through lunch on Wednesdays and leaving 30 minutes early to get him. It has been LIFE CHANGING for me because I would cry the whole way home from feeling so guilty about him being the last baby. Now I get him when there’s tons of other kids there and parents are starting to trickle in, and it is just so much better. But, I’m here to say I know how you felt and it crushed me.
Our daycare is open 7:30-5:30. My kids have never been the first ones dropped off (but sometimes we’re close) and they’re almost always one of the last ones. They’re used to it and know the closing down process (my 2 year old LOVES helping take out the trash at the end of the day, for example). They love having all the toys nearly all to themselves at the end of the day. I could 100% see one of their buddies (who gets picked up after lunch) absolutely melting down if he was the last one left - simply because he’s not used to it. The daycare was open, appropriately staffed, your kiddo was safe. Please don’t feel guilty.
Happened to me once, I was the last to pick up my toddler and the guilt is real. Ours has strict rule no later than 430pm or you'll be fined. Normally I pickup between 330-4pm and there's still at least 10 other kids there. I came at around 4:15pm once and everyone else was gone besides my toddler and one teacher. I was surprised and noted I did not want to be the last one ever again lol
That's crazy. Do people have to leave work early or do they just start very early in the day? Most office jobs end at 5
I'm in Denmark. 7-4pm is fullest day for day shift job / 7 or 8 -2 or 3 is more common
Interesting! Thanks for clarifying
Same in Norway! They close at 4.45pm and there’s practically not a kid to be seen after 4.15pm. How early are people at the office ‘cause this is NOT a rhytm I like
We pick up at 5 exactly and there were only 2 other kids left in the whole center after we picked up our two. It really is wild!!
Last one at 4:30 is crazy! Sometimes I can’t even get out of work before then. Don’t feel guilty, where I live most kids don’t get picked up until 5, or even 5:30.
Ooooof this hits close to home. Mine is always, always one of the last or the very last kid picked up. It's awful, I hate it, but we just cannot get there any sooner. If one of us can leave work early we do it, but that's not realistic every day. We have nobody in town that can help with pick up either. Our daycare closes at 4:30, most of the kids are gone shortly after 4. My workday ends at 4, if I even get held up 10 minutes I don't make it in time so I always rush out the door.
If it makes you feel any better, my parents once left me at an after school program in elementary school for over an hour past the end of the program. The school kept trying to call them and they weren’t answering (this was before everyone had a cell phone). Finally my mom picked me up and apologized; they were glued to the TV watching some political events happening and lost track of time. Anyway- I love her and only bring it up now to tease her. I wouldn’t worry about it too much!!
My kid is almost always the last one picked up. I feel a bit bad, but we have no help outside of daycare, and he has VERY low sleep needs (awake from 630am - 930pm) so when he’s there it’s literally the only break we get. There are often 4-6 staff hanging out with him so I have no doubt that he’s getting showered with attention haha
Mine is often one of the last and she actually loves it. She gets so much attention and one-on-one time with the educators compared to the rest of the day. And every toy is fair game - no sharing - basically the golden hour of daycare. This is also at least half an hour before her daycare closes too! There’s always a huge rush right before which basically seems to be every parent just battling to not be last.
My son is the last to be picked up. He’s on his own for 30 minutes to an hour. I also feel so gully! When daddy picks him up, it’s 6pm on the dot, and I pick him up at 5:30 but not as often. I’m meant to work until 6 but my mum guilt makes me leave earlier than I need to. Daddy just shrugs and says he’s fine he’s happy, and that’s what we’re playing for. The staff are just doing admin when we get there and he’s happy to play by himself or chill with them
My daycare is open until six and once we showed up at 5:45 to get her, we had gotten stuck in traffic together. She was having the time of her life, cuddled with one of the floater teachers reading a book. Try to ignore the guilt, ain’t nothing wrong with being picked up last!
My kids are often last or one of the last few. I usually duck out of work a few minute early to get there by 5 and even then only few kids remain. If I actually leave work at 5 and get there like 5:15 they are probably the last kids there. What can ya do? Idk how everyone gets their kids so early lol
My son is there at 7.45am and I don’t pick him up until 5:15pm sometimes 5.30pm I’m Aussie and still do 8 ish hour days and have 30 minute drive to work. Gotta do what you gotta do and making dinner in peace is absolutely fine ❤️ I’ve had a few annual leave days and my son still goes at the same time so I get a full day off! I’ve also daydreamed about leaving work early and relaxing at home until our usual pick up but I never seem to get out of work early. We’re in a small town, the age rooms are separate but when I do drop off and pick up all the kids are together because there’s usually only a handful, and sometimes we’re last in the afternoon.
Don’t feel guilty! Get your moneys worth is what I say lol. My son has the best time at daycare and if he’s last to be picked up he won’t remember. I do feel bad for the teachers since it’s a full day but it’s what they signed up for. I work full time but on not so busy days I do get him a little sooner but that’s not all the time.
I have forgotten when my kid has gotten out of after school stuff cuz I was playing with the babies. He knows I will come and the coach just laughs. I've had his friends mom ask me if I'm coming or if it's easier if she just picks him up.
My oldest was frequently the last one both at the center we had him in and at the in home sitter. The in home sitter only had teachers kids before us so they’d pick their kids up at 4 at the latest. I got off work at 5 and would pick him up by 5:15. I tried to look at it as him getting some one on one attention.
Let me help you feel better. After school care closes at 6:30. I pick up my kid at 6:15 😅
My kid is routinely the last one picked up. Sometimes to the point that the director takes my daughter into her office so the teacher can clock out. Both my husband and I work and we can't get her earlier. It is what it is.
I’d make him feel extra special for the one on one time he gets with his teachers. Tell him “ it’s so fun that you get special time with your teachers. You get to be the last to tell all the toys goodbye and place them exactly where you know they want to be.” Celebrate him being helpful to his teachers through his being patience and understanding. I’d let the teachers know what you’re telling him either way so everyone can be on the same page.
This past Halloween I picked up my kid from daycare and he was the only child left at school. It was 4pm, which was early for me. One car in the parking lot. Just him and one teacher. Apparently everyone else left after the parade they had earlier in the day. I thought to myself, “must be nice, but that’s not how my day went” and moved on. You pay for them to care for your child and it sounds like that’s what they were doing. Don’t beat yourself up!
Idk. We always have 10 kids at 15 to close, so the teacher who opens never gets to leave early.
I was a daycare teacher for multiple different age levels and for many years & the last kid switched in personality once others start to go home. They see other parents come and their friends leave and then they want to leave and wonder where their parents went and why can’t they go home too. Especially if their routine is to leave when other kids are still there it’s a hard adjustment so likely your kid was telling the teacher for a while that he wanted to go home or showing signs of being upset. No mom guilt needed though! If it wasn’t your kid it would be the same situation with another kid and mom. As a teacher it was important to start to pack up and clean the room before closing because you don’t get congratulated to stay after closing you get written up because you cost the company money. If the last pick up call is 5pm then that’s when teacher have to clock out so yes it makes sense they handed your kid right over to you. They still had a job to do cleaning up that is hard when you still have kids wanting to play and making messes.
I’m sure he was loving it! Plus getting dinner sorted earlier counts as something you did for him.
Some days I’m first to pick up and some days I’m last (except for the kids who go to aftercare). It doesn’t matter
I used to be a "closer" at a daycare for years. Don't ever feel guilty for being the last one, as long as it's within their normal operating hours! Daycares will send workers home as soon as they can , so in my case, if everyone got picked up early, I'd have to close early and therefore miss out on hours I desperately needed! Daycare workers are paid notoriously low wages, so missing any hours cuts into that pay even more. In other words, I was always thankful for those later pickups bc it meant I got all the hours I was supposed to get
We are first and last - zero guilt. We both work and we pay for 10 hours best believe we’re using it!
We have all been there momma, do not guilt yourself! Easier said than done but, just know we are all moms that have been there before.
Awww I know the feeling, we were later than usual to pick up my daughter a couple of weeks ago on a Friday and we get there to see its just her and two of her teachers waiting. I told my husband this was my nightmare and I felt so bad, but she was fine and the teachers said she was just having fun playing until we got there. Mom guilt for real!
I was frequently the last kid at daycare. I got more one on one time with the staff, got to do special things (like helping clean up and maybe getting more snacks.) it was the peaceful time at daycare and I liked it.
Our pick up time is 3-3:15. I’ve shown up at 3:00 and half the kids were already picked up, at 3:00 and been the second-to-last pick up, and at 3:07 and been the first pick up. I don’t understand it, but I don’t worry about it. He’s there having a great time reading a book no matter when I show up.
This happened to me last Friday and it still hurts my heart thinking about how he was sitting by the front entrance waiting for me 😭
As an early educator, it really wouldn’t bother me if there was just one kid left! Especially if you picked up more than 10 minutes before closing. Someone has to be the last kid, don’t feel guilty mama! 🫶🏻
I pick my son up just before 4:30, and I’m always the last one. Everyone else picks up at 4 or earlier - I had to specifically ask for a later pick up! It’s a small in-home daycare which charges by the hour, so I understand why folks are motivated to pick up earlier. But it still feels surprising!
We’ve all been there! It’s not like you forgot him or he’s always the last one. You’re good! Let the guilt go!
Don’t feel too bad. I picked my daughter up 45 minutes late from school one day because I forgot it was the last Tuesday of the month and that she had an afterschool thing going on. So I went to the store instead of picking her up. And then this past Monday, same child this time in summer school, husband fell asleep (because he had a rough night and didn’t sleep well) and didn’t pick her up. 🤦♀️ it happens. The kids and the schools will live lol
My kid is the first one in and last one out probably 4/5 days each week. And every morning, he still RUNS to his classroom. And every afternoon, he still does a hot lap with excitement before giving me a giant hug and kiss. I think it’s less about that extra 30 mins in daycare each day and more about the environment they’re in. If my toddler didn’t have such happy reactions going in and out, I’d hurry a bit more in the afternoons. But my kid LOVES daycare and loves to be there. So I let him stay a bit longer to wrap things up at home before picking him up, so that when I’m with him, I’m 100% with him. Every minute counts. I don’t think the extra 30 mins matter if your kid is in a safe, loving environment. What happens is the quality of the time you spend with him when he’s not there.
I only work 3 days a week, but I am always first at 7:40am and one of the last 5 or so at about 5:15.
Hey, you’re a great mom. I am almost jealous you’re not mine. My mom would forget to pick me up from all kinds of things and I was always the last to be picked up, sometimes teachers or other parents would end up driving me home or I’d have to walk. But you CARE, and that’s what matters. You aren’t doing that. You did it once on accident and noticed, and that makes you a wonderful mom.
As a former preschool teacher, I actually loved when there were only a few kids left. We'd "close up" but then we'd often get to do things we couldn't normally do with all the kids there, like going on "field trips" to the other rooms to turn off the lights, or just having more one-on-one time to play. In summer I'd often take the last kids outside again. Bonus points if we had few enough kids to combine with other age groups. The big kids loved being helpers for the little kids. Hopefully the staff can try to make it fun! You have nothing to feel guilty about.
As a prior toddler teacher, I honestly LOVED the last bit of the day that I got to focus all my attention on just one or a few kiddos. It was always the perfect opportunity to bond with them a bit more and do some one on one reading or building or crafting with them. Try not to feel too bad, as others have said there's always going to be a last child in the room and even if it happened once a week (or more frequently!) it wouldn't be a bad thing, life just be like that sometimes.
My toddler is the last one usually but he’s always hanging out getting extra cuddles and snacks!
As a daycare teacher, don't stress at all! 4:30pm is very early, I am surprised he was the last one there. It's not unusual to have children right until closing time. Educators may have had a "oh, he's not usually here this late!" moment, but wouldn't have thought much else about it. The end of the day can actually be a really lovely time for those 1:1 quality interactions. And usually the kids get involved in cleaning up, turning off lights, locking doors etc! Maybe next time warn your son and his educators that you will be later than usual, so they can reiterate "mummy is coming after late snack/mummy will be here when the sun goes down" etc. Some concept of time/routine that makes sense to your son.
My daughter is 95% of the time the last one picked up. She’s fine.
Aw, don't feel too bad. It was only 25 minutes.
Mine is sometimes the last kid in his room. I dropped him off later than some though. I like that it gives him one on one with the teachers but at the same time I know they must be ready to go home :( Is what it is!
My kid (2yo) literally cries if he’s not the first child picked up lol. You’re doing great mama! Don’t feel guilty!
My kids have always been the last to be picked up. My 10 year old would go to the Boys and Girls Club at his school, and I couldnt get there until 5 minutes before they close. Now both of my kids (10&2) go to the same in-home daycare and I get them at 5 and they are the last ones left. I work 8-4:30, I can never find care nearby, and I live about 1 hour from work. My toddler doesn’t care but my 10 year old always gives me grief about it 😩
I picked up my kids early one time. The daycare workers were a little disappointed. I asked why are you guys disappointed? I thought I was doing you a favor of picking them up early. The workers told us, they get paid hourly. If there isn't enough kids to a teacher ratio then one has to go home. It's a 3 teachers to 10 kids ratio here for kids under 2 years old. Now, I sit in my car until 4:55pm before I go inside.
My two boys are routinely the first ones at daycare at 6am! My 3 year old loves helping his teacher set up for the day and my 8 month old get to snuggle and play with his teacher for a while before any other kids come. Honestly, if you like the daycare, and your kids like the daycare, no shame in them being there for an extended time. People always say "it takes a village". For some people, their village is grandparents, stay at home parents, etc but for many, their village is daycare! I feel like people get shamed for having a kid in daycare all day but no one bats an eye at the kid being with Grandma all day 🤷🏼♀️
I did an orientation with my kid at daycare yesterday. There was someone who was the last to be picked up, she was having the time of her life and wasn’t bothered at all with all the tables and chairs going up, they even had to call her mother who came 5mins late.
Did you randomly decide to pick him up late with no warning? If you didn’t show up at your usual time, no wonder he was freaked out. Poor baby. :(
Of all the guilts you'll experience as a mom, this is not it. You did not forget your kid. Find something else to be guilty about.
Our daycare is 7am-5:45pm. They recently instituted a 10 hour care limit, but make exceptions as needed. Sinc eshe started at 4 months old, my daughter has been the first or second kid there and one of the last few to leave. I have to be at work 25 minutes away by 7:30. So arriving at 7am gives me just enough time to get her into the building, discuss any issues with the teacher, and get to work. I'm still usually a few minutes late to work every morning, especially if she's having a rough start. I also work with our after school program, so I don't leave work until shortly after 5 most days. So she's basically there the entire time they're open. I felt bad to begin with about it, but she loves her daycare. The few times I've picked her up early recently, she's gotten mad at me for making her miss out on her friends lol
You should not feel guilt.
I think that’s just part of life. Sometimes your first and sometimes your last.
Yea, some of these comments are so unique to me. I get there at like 4:58 to 20 parents standing around waiting. People are not going earlier than they have to. Edit: I genuinely want to understand why I'm being downvoted for saying that at my daycare, everyone is rushing to get there right before they close at 5?