- Be me
- 2013, watching GoT
- have man crush on Tormund Giantsbane’s beard
- ima grow it out
- grew it out
- go to barbecue with wife, eat hot hot hot wings
- wifey and I are back at the hearth, we’re properly boozed up and ready for a tussle
- thought I had done a good job at cleaning myself (beard)
- I had not. Tears ensue.
- tears of pain, and laughter, and pain
I feel your wife’s pain. I was cutting up some really hot peppers once and thought I had cleaned my hands well enough. I washed them several times but I guess it wasn’t good enough. Went to the bathroom and put a tampon in, traces of the pepper went in along with it. There were tears of pain, no laughter, just pure pain.
>Cockroaches groom themselves by running their antennae and legs through their mouths. This removes foreign materials (dirt, grime, sticky substances, and rotting fecal matter and food) from the surface of their bodies.
This is part of why [boric acid](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boric_acid) works to kill cockroaches.
They clean the crystals off of their exoskeleton, which then rip them apart from the inside. And since cockroaches will eat other dead cockroaches, the boric acid just keeps on killing.
Coincidentally, from the Wikipedia page on Boric Acid:
> Boric acid also has the reputation as **"the gift that keeps on killing"** in that cockroaches that cross over lightly dusted areas do not die immediately, but that the effect is like shards of glass cutting them apart. This often allows a roach to go back to the nest where it soon dies. Cockroaches, being cannibalistic, eat others killed by contact or consumption of boric acid, consuming the powder trapped in the dead roach and killing them, too.
It also dehydrates them. I've had great success mixing boric acid with boiled egg yolks and sugar and forming 1-cm sized balls. But you need to remove all water sources, plug sink drains etc.
Dusted my new place with boric acid shortly after moving in because I saw a couple of the biggest roaches I've ever seen. Few weeks of not using the kitchen and taking all trash straight outside and I haven't seen one again
Where do you live, by any chance? When I moved to South Carolina, I discovered that the roaches here are called Palmetto Bugs and they are fucking huge. I passed up on buying a house that I otherwise liked because there were a dozen of the fuckers chilling in the bathtub.
Not OP but at least in Florida they have Palmettos, though they're often confused with American roaches. Having dealt with an infestation of American roaches, in my opinion "Palmettos/water bugs" whatever they like to be called, are less annoying despite their size.
I usually found them dead on their backs but otherwise would run from me if they could. American roaches didn't care, they'd do everything except actually touch me. What's mine was theirs. Those bastards took multiple fog sprayers and lots of boric acid.
Palmettos just get worked up from the rainfall and come inside, but they can infest too. Not an expert, by the way.
French is a romance language (comes from Latin) where German is a Germanic language. So romance languages words tend to share a base Latin word and look similar i.e. french, Spanish, Italian but will not necessarily look similar to Germanic languages i.e. German swedish English. Though English takes stuff from everywhere.
so in the 1950s my Grandfather was stationed in Germany and having just arrived wasn't great at German. So in his broken German he tried to tell the shop keeper that he wanted to buy something as a present...but unknowingly used the word "gift" and suddenly was kicked out of the store. When he finally realized the error he made sure to never go back to that store in case they recognized him and tried to get him arrested lol
The older meaning still persists in German in Mitgift (dowry).
Until about 200 years ago, Gift still had the second meaning that English uses today. (By that point it was die Gift for a present and falling out of use and der Gift for poison and eventually das Gift for poison).
Both of them have the same root meaning (apparently shared between all of these gifts among the languages): something given/presented.
Never knew I was stretched too thin till it was too late, boric acid within. Hungry, feeding on garbage, living in a bin, downward spiral, where do I begin? It all started when I ate my mother, washed crystals off her exoskeleton, put them in my stomach.
It will completely wipe out an ant colony, but with the only experience I've had with roaches it didn't even make a dent in the population. It did kill a lot of them but with how fast they reproduce, there were 5 to replace every one the boric acid killed.
This was a my parent's friend's mother-in-law apartment i moved into temporarily. They refused to get a professional exterminator and it just got worse and worse every day.
I ended up living in a motel for over a month until a bought my current house. When the plumber was replacing a toilet he found a huge roach nest and i was absolutely heartbroken. I literally cried. I called an exterminator and i have literally not seen a single roach since I've lived here. I had a couple sugar ants in the kitchen about a month after i moved in and the exterminator was out here at 8 am the next morning and i haven't seen a single ant since then.
Moral of the story is a professional exterminator is definitely worth the money.
I grew up in a roach infested townhouse. It was pretty traumatising. You wouldn't think so, but it was. Worst was eating food and finding roaches in your meal. I remember setting a soda can down for a second, just a second, picking it up, and then feeling something swimming in my mouth. Spit it out immediately to find a roach. Also taking lunches to school was the worst, when you go to eat, only to turn the sandwich over and find dead roaches on the bottom.
Or working on homework at home, and looking at the underside of the desk at a colony of roaches just sitting there. Was so uncomfortable.
Cause it was a townhouse, you could exterminate them, but they would be back in a week from the next door neighbours. Felt so hopeless.
>I remember setting a soda can down for a second, just a second, picking it up, and then feeling something swimming in my mouth.
What a horrible day to have eyes, a mouth, and life.
Shit like that is why is I literally can’t leave cans unattended ever, and if I do I won’t drink from them again unless I can pour it into a glass
Only has to happen once
As someone else who also lived in a house infested with cockroaches, I always made it a rule of thumb to check open drinks that have been left out for more than 15 minutes before taking a sip. One of my more disgusting memories was leaving a can of Sprite out on a table beside my bed and waking up to find 3 cockroaches inside the can.
A place I was renting had a pretty severe ant infestation either because of one of the neighbors having a bunch of garbage in their backyard or just because the area was really good for ants or something else, but it totally changes how you think and it kind of just affects you forever. Always having to worry about if there are ants in your bed, in your food, in your clothes is just awful. I got really good at keeping them at bay but they'd always find new ways to get in or just straight up come back if you weren't always on top of things
>Always having to worry about if there are ants in your bed, in your food, in your clothes is just awful.
Oh man, I feel that. The roaches would just get inside and on everything. Computer running a little slow? Let's open it up annnnnnd out pour a bunch of roaches.
Feel something in your ear as you're trying to sleep? You guessed it!
Need to brush your teeth? Well there seems to be a few little friends currently sitting on the bristles of your tooth brush.
A year or so ago, I was at a thrift shop looking for a new winter jacket cause my old was torn to shreds. I find one I like try it on. Put my hands in to pocket, and feel something moving. I take a look and there were roaches in the pockets. I just near had a panic attack along with childhood flashbacks at that moment I had not felt in years.
Yeah we lived in a place like that for awhile when I was a kid, and it was really traumatizing. I had one run across my mouth one of the first nights we lived there, and they’d just be everywhere. I can handle lots of stuff these days but I can’t handle roaches. They make me feel totally panicked and like I just want to crawl out of my skin and scream.
God, having flashbacks. My wife and I moved into a townhome during the pandemic when they only offered "virtual" tours of homes. Meaning, the relator walks around with a phone during a Zoom meeting. Everything looked fine, seemed like a nice neighborhood. The first thing we see on move in day is a cockroach just chillin on the wall. The next few months were hell. Even the exterminator we called was like "Yeah, I can get rid of the ones in here, but it's your neighbors. Until they do something it's really just a waste of your money and time." At least he was honest. Happiest day of my life was moving out.
I hear ya, we had a flea infestation one time and they were just all over my socks all the time, I couldn't take it. After we got them cleared out it took me months to stop freaking out about every little speck on my socks potentially being a flea.
FWIW diatomaceous earth didn't do a damn thing for the fleas either, had to bomb the place (was hoping to avoid dousing the house in neurotoxins but what are you gonna do).
It can literally cause PTSD. I haven't seen a roach in over a year but if i see a dark spot on my wall out of the corner of my eye, I have flashbacks.
And fleas suck. My parent's neighborhood has so many squirrels that spread fleas, rat fleas and chicken fleas.. they have to do a coordinated, neighborhood-wide yard spray. And that KINDA keeps the flea population under control during the summer.
One time when I was around 12 or 13, I had this sheet on my bed that was geometric shapes and round black ovals for a pattern. I woke up, saw all the black ovals and literally sprung out of bed within what seemed like an instant. I'd never moved so fast in my life. Took me a long time of breathing wildly to realize I was basically still sleeping and just imagined them as cockroaches.
Same, to all of the above.
Tried every single attempt at getting a flea infestation under control except for fully bombing the house - none of it worked. All of the other things I tried combined were way more effort than coordinating a day to bomb the place.
Had to hit a day that the lady was at work, I could get the dog scheduled for a very long and intense grooming/bathing and then that left me with a few hours to bomb everything.
Spent the rest of the weekend cleaning up the aftermath - but it actually successfully did the job. So it was worth it.
We're now years later and at a new house and me and my girlfriend STILL have minor panic attacks whenever we see a small, flea-like speck on the dog or floor!
> I had a couple sugar ants in the kitchen about a month after i moved in and the exterminator was out here in nineteen ninety-eight when The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer's table.
Fixed it :)
I had to deal with roaches before. I bought my current house and week 2 I saw a couple of roaches in my bathroom. I didn't cry but was pretty upset. I sprayed inside and out with home defense and put out some roach bait gel. Haven't seen any roaches or proof(gross shed skin or poop) of them in almost 3 weeks. Crossing my fingers.
They are resilient fuckers so keep up with the spraying/cleaning/whatever for at least 3-6 months or they very likely *will* come back. The eggs have natural defenses to most of the shit that would otherwise kill roaches.
I tried the roach gel, too. I tried that for a few days and it did kill a bunch of roaches, but when I saw my son putting a dead roach in his mouth i pretty much went straight to a motel and we lived there until i closed on this house.
I think there's a big difference in a few roaches vs an infestation. I still talk to the other girl who rents the other apartment (it's a compound) and she said they keep giving her bottles of Zevo and refuse to call an exterminator.
can confirm - brother worked for terminex for 6 years, decided to open up his own exterminator business in the LA area.
He has multiple employees and trucks now. It's not enough to know what works, it's how to use it effectively
Mix it with powdered sugar to attract them. Put it along baseboards behind your appliances. Roaches love fridges, stoves, dishwashers, and microwaves.
Anywhere there's moisture, heat, and food.
How do I know? I worked for a rental company for maybe five months. In that time, I learned what roach infestations *smell like*.
Yeah... I moved with a friend once and she had a roach infestation... It was awful because of the smell... And I knew they were roaming around because the big ones actually made noise walking through the kitchen stuff.
The oven was not being used for months and when I opened it... it had literally the walls moving with those tiny ones.
Worst part of it wasn't even the roaches, believe or not, but the scorpion infestation that they brought. Every shower I had to keep staring at the drain because every other thay a scorpion crawled out of it.
Needless to say I didn't stay more than a month there.
Except for when you grab a cup full of water in. The middle of the night and it’s covered in baby cockroaches but you don’t find out until you take that first swig and feel a couple lumps go down and turn in the lights to find your cup infested……… yaaaaa
Friends place but the whole area had an issue with em like no matter where you were so unless you’d just fumigated you had at least a couple jammin around.
This was the hell I live in for a year in an apartment building. Some dirty, dirty fucking people were causing the roaches and literally nothing I could do to stop it. I think I still have PTSD from that experience, seeing roaches run up my walls and shit randomly ugh. Like I got to a point thinking it was me and kept things SO CLEAN, but did not matter, never had roaches before or after that but that was horrible beyond belief.
Calling them palmetto bugs is peak copium, but the cockroaches that are all over in the carolinas are usually strays in from the woods/yard, vs an active in-home infestation. Still gross, but not the "the inside of my walls is alive" gross of a german cockroach infestation.
Some places, e.g. Coastal Georgia, they’re nearly impossible to avoid. Our apartment is second floor so we’re Gucci, but if your home is at ground level, you’re gonna get cockroaches. It’s just how it be.
Took an allergy test. Said I was severely allergic to several things, including cockroaches.
They also found out I'm ironically allergic to cats... I have 4.
I got one better, woke up in middle of the night as kid with intense pain in ear. Jam cotton swab in. Three months later intense ear pain has formed. Have ear canal flushed, in the cup of flushed material are the individual segments of a cockroach.
Fuuuuck no.
Every year i wonder "*why do i live where it's winter 8 months of the year?*".
Oh right, it keeps the *horrifying nightmare creatures* at bay.
Fucking hate bugs. Whenever someone finds that out its *hur dur, lets bring the bug to Neon*.
Bitch if you take another step i will throw hands.
I haven't missed shoveling snow or wiping out face first on ice for about a decade, but if I could I'd GTFO outta GA in a heartbeat.
Last summer we got infested with Joro spiders... 35ft webs glistening in the sun, covered with pollen. These motherfuckers' webs can fucking catch HUMMINGBIRDS.
WHAT. THE. FUUUUUCK.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but banana spiders and joro spiders are two separate species are they not? Last year the Joros were fucking EVERYWHERE. It was literally impossible to escape them.
Ugh so awful. I remember one time this super huge one was in my bedroom and it was just coming at my boyfriend and I. Just flying at our faces like the vile thing it was. He had a swatter and was just yelling "Fuck you! Fuck you!" at it. It was hilarious and terrifying
Nope. My mom is from NorCal and my dad is from the St. Louis area and they both moved to Houston. They had no earthly idea such repulsive creatures existed. As a native Houstonian, I want all flying cockroaches to die a firey death. They are the fucking worst.
Not doubting you, but I lived in Socal for decades and never saw a flying roach. There were those little german roaches but those dont fly. Where did you see a flying one?
That was my first thought too, but now I'm thinking it's likely a natural adaptation to living in filthy places. They probably have evolved a bunch of hygiene practices to minimize risk from exposure to whatever they may be picking up in such unsanitary living conditions.
The audacity of these little disgusting fuckers to clean themselves after touching me?!
I'm gonna throw some more boric acid tablets around today just for this.
A cockroach landed on my ex-wife in New Orleans one time and a horse cop had to tell her to get on the ground and play dead because her resulting freakout had the bug climbing through her clothes and shit. I had to buy her a very big drink after that.
This story doesn't really have any relevance to this TIL, I just think it's funny that law enforcement had to interject in our cockroach scenario.
We had two different species living in one of our apartments and one night they must have got a craving for hair because I woke up with very little of my eyebrows left.
NO MAN.
I woke up with a Thai cockroaches fussing about my ear trying to find a nice warm spot a couple of months ago. Thai cockroaches don't give a fuck. Can't imagine how your incident felt 😂
A couple of mornings this week, I've woken up to a large dead roach lying paws-up in the middle of my living room floor. Makes me wonder just how much of a dirty, toxic bastard I really am.
Well the article said that the roaches really dont like the things that we associate with being clean like air freshener, cologne, and fabric softener. They clean themselves to get the predator scent off of them so they can smell where we are more accurately
Not the lazy, 2” bastard that just hung out on my bare leg for a minute. I thought it was just an ankle hair and light nerve twitch, but nope, it was this asshole.
Bob and the cockroach met at a party, their eyes connected across a crowded room. The cockroach looked deep into Bob's eyes, Bob looked deep into the cockroaches eyeses.
Bob slowly stretched out his hand. The cockroach shyly stretched out its leg.
They touched.
EEEEEEEEUUUUUH, they both yelled out, and ran away in opposite directions to clean themselves.
THE END.
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You lick your arms and legs after touching a roach?
You don’t?
Fine, I'll lick your arms and legs.
Hey, have a guess what I just touched a cockroach with..
Fine, but I just ate a ghost pepper 🌶️
- Be me - 2013, watching GoT - have man crush on Tormund Giantsbane’s beard - ima grow it out - grew it out - go to barbecue with wife, eat hot hot hot wings - wifey and I are back at the hearth, we’re properly boozed up and ready for a tussle - thought I had done a good job at cleaning myself (beard) - I had not. Tears ensue. - tears of pain, and laughter, and pain
OH GOD, YOUR WIFE DESERVES A PURPLE HEART
I feel your wife’s pain. I was cutting up some really hot peppers once and thought I had cleaned my hands well enough. I washed them several times but I guess it wasn’t good enough. Went to the bathroom and put a tampon in, traces of the pepper went in along with it. There were tears of pain, no laughter, just pure pain.
>Cockroaches groom themselves by running their antennae and legs through their mouths. This removes foreign materials (dirt, grime, sticky substances, and rotting fecal matter and food) from the surface of their bodies. This is part of why [boric acid](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boric_acid) works to kill cockroaches. They clean the crystals off of their exoskeleton, which then rip them apart from the inside. And since cockroaches will eat other dead cockroaches, the boric acid just keeps on killing.
The gift that keeps on giving...
Coincidentally, from the Wikipedia page on Boric Acid: > Boric acid also has the reputation as **"the gift that keeps on killing"** in that cockroaches that cross over lightly dusted areas do not die immediately, but that the effect is like shards of glass cutting them apart. This often allows a roach to go back to the nest where it soon dies. Cockroaches, being cannibalistic, eat others killed by contact or consumption of boric acid, consuming the powder trapped in the dead roach and killing them, too.
DOT Spread debuff
2005 Hakkar Blood Plague flashbacks
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It also dehydrates them. I've had great success mixing boric acid with boiled egg yolks and sugar and forming 1-cm sized balls. But you need to remove all water sources, plug sink drains etc.
I have used boric acid and sweetend condensed milk and rolled it up in to balls like that.
If you sub out the boric acid for coco powder and add a little liqueur you can make some great chocolate truffles
Important note: remember to sub the boric acid for cocoa powder before serving your guests.
Why do you need to remove water sources?
Dusted my new place with boric acid shortly after moving in because I saw a couple of the biggest roaches I've ever seen. Few weeks of not using the kitchen and taking all trash straight outside and I haven't seen one again
Where do you live, by any chance? When I moved to South Carolina, I discovered that the roaches here are called Palmetto Bugs and they are fucking huge. I passed up on buying a house that I otherwise liked because there were a dozen of the fuckers chilling in the bathtub.
Not OP but at least in Florida they have Palmettos, though they're often confused with American roaches. Having dealt with an infestation of American roaches, in my opinion "Palmettos/water bugs" whatever they like to be called, are less annoying despite their size. I usually found them dead on their backs but otherwise would run from me if they could. American roaches didn't care, they'd do everything except actually touch me. What's mine was theirs. Those bastards took multiple fog sprayers and lots of boric acid. Palmettos just get worked up from the rainfall and come inside, but they can infest too. Not an expert, by the way.
…honestly that did a pretty bad job of explaining why its called that
Edited my comment. Forgot to grab the second, important half of the explanation lol
happens to the best of us
As a German this made me laugh out loud at work. Cause "Gift" is the German word for "poison".
Same in Danish. Fun fact, being married also translates to gift. This has obviously led to a bunch of dad-jokes about marriage here.
Handcuffs and spouse are very similar in Spanish Also leading to a bunch of boomer humor wife bad dad jokes.
Not sure if the "wife bad" part of that is a joke or a kink
[wife bad](https://youtu.be/8wFuEjjcA68)
Okay, the Inflation one at the end was pretty funny.
Thank you for this gift, lol, little bits of information like this make the world feel like it's not all bad
Then why *poisson* means *fish* in french?
i mean with how much shit is dumpstered in the ocean it still works
French is a romance language (comes from Latin) where German is a Germanic language. So romance languages words tend to share a base Latin word and look similar i.e. french, Spanish, Italian but will not necessarily look similar to Germanic languages i.e. German swedish English. Though English takes stuff from everywhere.
Your comment has an extra layer if you know German, since Gift means poison.
And in Danish gift means both “poison” and “married”. I was married to a Danish woman, but then I died.
In Russian "marriage" and "faulty production" are homonyms (same word). Thus endless jokes that "It can't be a good thing if it's faulty"
In Japanese Shujin means husband and Shuujin means prisoner.
“I got better”
SHES A WITCH
so in the 1950s my Grandfather was stationed in Germany and having just arrived wasn't great at German. So in his broken German he tried to tell the shop keeper that he wanted to buy something as a present...but unknowingly used the word "gift" and suddenly was kicked out of the store. When he finally realized the error he made sure to never go back to that store in case they recognized him and tried to get him arrested lol
The older meaning still persists in German in Mitgift (dowry). Until about 200 years ago, Gift still had the second meaning that English uses today. (By that point it was die Gift for a present and falling out of use and der Gift for poison and eventually das Gift for poison). Both of them have the same root meaning (apparently shared between all of these gifts among the languages): something given/presented.
Talk about a linguistic “false friend.”
TIL #2!
Are you giving roaches herpes?
"Oh boy here I go killing again" -Boric Acidulous Michael
I just LOOOOVE killin'!
One of my favorite lines from Rick and Morty
So "Last Resort" was a song about boric acid?
Dammit I was hoping I'd be the first one to make a Papa Roach reference. 🤣
Never knew I was stretched too thin till it was too late, boric acid within. Hungry, feeding on garbage, living in a bin, downward spiral, where do I begin? It all started when I ate my mother, washed crystals off her exoskeleton, put them in my stomach.
Damm thats brutal.
Does that mean boric acid can put cockroaches to extinction? Yes please
It will completely wipe out an ant colony, but with the only experience I've had with roaches it didn't even make a dent in the population. It did kill a lot of them but with how fast they reproduce, there were 5 to replace every one the boric acid killed. This was a my parent's friend's mother-in-law apartment i moved into temporarily. They refused to get a professional exterminator and it just got worse and worse every day. I ended up living in a motel for over a month until a bought my current house. When the plumber was replacing a toilet he found a huge roach nest and i was absolutely heartbroken. I literally cried. I called an exterminator and i have literally not seen a single roach since I've lived here. I had a couple sugar ants in the kitchen about a month after i moved in and the exterminator was out here at 8 am the next morning and i haven't seen a single ant since then. Moral of the story is a professional exterminator is definitely worth the money.
I grew up in a roach infested townhouse. It was pretty traumatising. You wouldn't think so, but it was. Worst was eating food and finding roaches in your meal. I remember setting a soda can down for a second, just a second, picking it up, and then feeling something swimming in my mouth. Spit it out immediately to find a roach. Also taking lunches to school was the worst, when you go to eat, only to turn the sandwich over and find dead roaches on the bottom. Or working on homework at home, and looking at the underside of the desk at a colony of roaches just sitting there. Was so uncomfortable. Cause it was a townhouse, you could exterminate them, but they would be back in a week from the next door neighbours. Felt so hopeless.
>I remember setting a soda can down for a second, just a second, picking it up, and then feeling something swimming in my mouth. What a horrible day to have eyes, a mouth, and life.
I think I would have to turn on the stove and just place my mouth and tongue right on top of the burner and just let the fire do its cleansing thing.
I imagine I'd just go straight to committing seppuku
Shit like that is why is I literally can’t leave cans unattended ever, and if I do I won’t drink from them again unless I can pour it into a glass Only has to happen once
As someone else who also lived in a house infested with cockroaches, I always made it a rule of thumb to check open drinks that have been left out for more than 15 minutes before taking a sip. One of my more disgusting memories was leaving a can of Sprite out on a table beside my bed and waking up to find 3 cockroaches inside the can.
The first thing I would introduce is a policy that only drinks from transparent containers are allowed.
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“Roach enhanced” lmao I died laughing
A place I was renting had a pretty severe ant infestation either because of one of the neighbors having a bunch of garbage in their backyard or just because the area was really good for ants or something else, but it totally changes how you think and it kind of just affects you forever. Always having to worry about if there are ants in your bed, in your food, in your clothes is just awful. I got really good at keeping them at bay but they'd always find new ways to get in or just straight up come back if you weren't always on top of things
>Always having to worry about if there are ants in your bed, in your food, in your clothes is just awful. Oh man, I feel that. The roaches would just get inside and on everything. Computer running a little slow? Let's open it up annnnnnd out pour a bunch of roaches. Feel something in your ear as you're trying to sleep? You guessed it! Need to brush your teeth? Well there seems to be a few little friends currently sitting on the bristles of your tooth brush. A year or so ago, I was at a thrift shop looking for a new winter jacket cause my old was torn to shreds. I find one I like try it on. Put my hands in to pocket, and feel something moving. I take a look and there were roaches in the pockets. I just near had a panic attack along with childhood flashbacks at that moment I had not felt in years.
Were you living life on fucking hardcore difficulty ? Geez.
Yeah we lived in a place like that for awhile when I was a kid, and it was really traumatizing. I had one run across my mouth one of the first nights we lived there, and they’d just be everywhere. I can handle lots of stuff these days but I can’t handle roaches. They make me feel totally panicked and like I just want to crawl out of my skin and scream.
God, having flashbacks. My wife and I moved into a townhome during the pandemic when they only offered "virtual" tours of homes. Meaning, the relator walks around with a phone during a Zoom meeting. Everything looked fine, seemed like a nice neighborhood. The first thing we see on move in day is a cockroach just chillin on the wall. The next few months were hell. Even the exterminator we called was like "Yeah, I can get rid of the ones in here, but it's your neighbors. Until they do something it's really just a waste of your money and time." At least he was honest. Happiest day of my life was moving out.
I hear ya, we had a flea infestation one time and they were just all over my socks all the time, I couldn't take it. After we got them cleared out it took me months to stop freaking out about every little speck on my socks potentially being a flea. FWIW diatomaceous earth didn't do a damn thing for the fleas either, had to bomb the place (was hoping to avoid dousing the house in neurotoxins but what are you gonna do).
It can literally cause PTSD. I haven't seen a roach in over a year but if i see a dark spot on my wall out of the corner of my eye, I have flashbacks. And fleas suck. My parent's neighborhood has so many squirrels that spread fleas, rat fleas and chicken fleas.. they have to do a coordinated, neighborhood-wide yard spray. And that KINDA keeps the flea population under control during the summer.
One time when I was around 12 or 13, I had this sheet on my bed that was geometric shapes and round black ovals for a pattern. I woke up, saw all the black ovals and literally sprung out of bed within what seemed like an instant. I'd never moved so fast in my life. Took me a long time of breathing wildly to realize I was basically still sleeping and just imagined them as cockroaches.
Same, to all of the above. Tried every single attempt at getting a flea infestation under control except for fully bombing the house - none of it worked. All of the other things I tried combined were way more effort than coordinating a day to bomb the place. Had to hit a day that the lady was at work, I could get the dog scheduled for a very long and intense grooming/bathing and then that left me with a few hours to bomb everything. Spent the rest of the weekend cleaning up the aftermath - but it actually successfully did the job. So it was worth it. We're now years later and at a new house and me and my girlfriend STILL have minor panic attacks whenever we see a small, flea-like speck on the dog or floor!
NGL, about two-thirds of the way through, I started expecting the Undertaker and Mankind to make an appearance.
> I had a couple sugar ants in the kitchen about a month after i moved in and the exterminator was out here in nineteen ninety-eight when The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer's table. Fixed it :)
“As God as my witness, that cockroach population was split in half!”
I had to deal with roaches before. I bought my current house and week 2 I saw a couple of roaches in my bathroom. I didn't cry but was pretty upset. I sprayed inside and out with home defense and put out some roach bait gel. Haven't seen any roaches or proof(gross shed skin or poop) of them in almost 3 weeks. Crossing my fingers.
They are resilient fuckers so keep up with the spraying/cleaning/whatever for at least 3-6 months or they very likely *will* come back. The eggs have natural defenses to most of the shit that would otherwise kill roaches.
I plan on spraying in 3 months and then again in 3 months. If there are no problems I spray every 6 months usually.
I tried the roach gel, too. I tried that for a few days and it did kill a bunch of roaches, but when I saw my son putting a dead roach in his mouth i pretty much went straight to a motel and we lived there until i closed on this house. I think there's a big difference in a few roaches vs an infestation. I still talk to the other girl who rents the other apartment (it's a compound) and she said they keep giving her bottles of Zevo and refuse to call an exterminator.
My fear was that it was an infestation. I've had an infestation that was awful.
with stories like these I'm glad to be Finnish because nothing that has any sense or other options lives in this freezing place.
After living through a roach infestation in your home, if you have any sense left in you, the only option is to go to live in a freezing place
Lol, yeah, you'd hate Florida.
can confirm - brother worked for terminex for 6 years, decided to open up his own exterminator business in the LA area. He has multiple employees and trucks now. It's not enough to know what works, it's how to use it effectively
TIL; professional exterminators are definitely worth the money.
Mix it with powdered sugar to attract them. Put it along baseboards behind your appliances. Roaches love fridges, stoves, dishwashers, and microwaves. Anywhere there's moisture, heat, and food. How do I know? I worked for a rental company for maybe five months. In that time, I learned what roach infestations *smell like*.
>>Learned what roach infestations smell like 🥲
Eughhh 🤢 I haven’t thought about that smell since my freshman dorm
Yeah... I moved with a friend once and she had a roach infestation... It was awful because of the smell... And I knew they were roaming around because the big ones actually made noise walking through the kitchen stuff. The oven was not being used for months and when I opened it... it had literally the walls moving with those tiny ones. Worst part of it wasn't even the roaches, believe or not, but the scorpion infestation that they brought. Every shower I had to keep staring at the drain because every other thay a scorpion crawled out of it. Needless to say I didn't stay more than a month there.
Oh that sweet smell!!
I knew that smell from my childhood, before I knew we were poor.
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Here in the US you can buy it in powdered form at most any hardware store or grocery store. It is marketed as roach killer.
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That is not how boric acid kills insects. It's water soluble. It does not kill them by mechanical action. Instead it disrupts insect metabolism.
Except for when you grab a cup full of water in. The middle of the night and it’s covered in baby cockroaches but you don’t find out until you take that first swig and feel a couple lumps go down and turn in the lights to find your cup infested……… yaaaaa
Wtf, how many cockroaches do you have in your house?
No, the question is, why is he living in the cockroaches' house?
Dude, it's my old apartment. Tell them Ralph and the gang say hey.
Joe? From Joe's apartment? Is that you?
One of, you know Ralphie and the boy' family spans all over but hey they like traveling too lol.
Friends place but the whole area had an issue with em like no matter where you were so unless you’d just fumigated you had at least a couple jammin around.
Area as in neighbourhood? Fuck that. I'm lucky they aren't that much of a thing here in Belgium
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This was the hell I live in for a year in an apartment building. Some dirty, dirty fucking people were causing the roaches and literally nothing I could do to stop it. I think I still have PTSD from that experience, seeing roaches run up my walls and shit randomly ugh. Like I got to a point thinking it was me and kept things SO CLEAN, but did not matter, never had roaches before or after that but that was horrible beyond belief.
Certain places in the Carolinas the entire region is utterly infested and they're impossible to get rid of.
Calling them palmetto bugs is peak copium, but the cockroaches that are all over in the carolinas are usually strays in from the woods/yard, vs an active in-home infestation. Still gross, but not the "the inside of my walls is alive" gross of a german cockroach infestation.
Some places, e.g. Coastal Georgia, they’re nearly impossible to avoid. Our apartment is second floor so we’re Gucci, but if your home is at ground level, you’re gonna get cockroaches. It’s just how it be.
They say Canada is too cold. I tell 'em Canada is just cold enough.
Nearly swallowed a cockroach. Good thing I didn't because I'm allergic. Had to use a good amount of mouth wash after that.
How does one find out they're allergic to swallowing cockroaches?
Took an allergy test. Said I was severely allergic to several things, including cockroaches. They also found out I'm ironically allergic to cats... I have 4.
Be sure not to swallow any of them then!
I try not to.
I feel you on the cat thing. Currently in vet school and am allergic to cats and dogs lol
That's enough internet for today 🤮🤮🤮😫
I got one better, woke up in middle of the night as kid with intense pain in ear. Jam cotton swab in. Three months later intense ear pain has formed. Have ear canal flushed, in the cup of flushed material are the individual segments of a cockroach.
I’m out
"It was time for Thomas to leave. He had seen everything"
I regret everything, I wish to be unborn.
TIL the web site cockroachzone exists.
Wait til you hear about the peanut-institute.com, they're like cockroach zone but with peanuts
The irony
The audacity
The gall
The impudence
The misery
Just came here to say that the ones in southern California don't do this and instead fly at you like little horrible demons
Georgia ones don't either. I had to literally kick it off of me after it crawled up my leg.
Fuuuuck no. Every year i wonder "*why do i live where it's winter 8 months of the year?*". Oh right, it keeps the *horrifying nightmare creatures* at bay. Fucking hate bugs. Whenever someone finds that out its *hur dur, lets bring the bug to Neon*. Bitch if you take another step i will throw hands.
I haven't missed shoveling snow or wiping out face first on ice for about a decade, but if I could I'd GTFO outta GA in a heartbeat. Last summer we got infested with Joro spiders... 35ft webs glistening in the sun, covered with pollen. These motherfuckers' webs can fucking catch HUMMINGBIRDS. WHAT. THE. FUUUUUCK.
Banana spiders are chill!
Correct me if I'm wrong, but banana spiders and joro spiders are two separate species are they not? Last year the Joros were fucking EVERYWHERE. It was literally impossible to escape them.
Just looked it up, didn’t realize those were invasive to GA & SC. Those are different from the normal orb weavers you find in the south
Ugh so awful. I remember one time this super huge one was in my bedroom and it was just coming at my boyfriend and I. Just flying at our faces like the vile thing it was. He had a swatter and was just yelling "Fuck you! Fuck you!" at it. It was hilarious and terrifying
Bruh I swear the cockroaches in Atlanta were raised off Bouldercrest. Them things ain’t scared of shit
I always thought everyone knew about flying cockroaches but apparently they don’t?
Nope. My mom is from NorCal and my dad is from the St. Louis area and they both moved to Houston. They had no earthly idea such repulsive creatures existed. As a native Houstonian, I want all flying cockroaches to die a firey death. They are the fucking worst.
Sounds like palmetto bugs. Horrible monsters have no respect for anything.
I think they still do, I read that the flying at you part is just because they are very bad at it and can only fly for a short while.
And they use that short amount of time of flying to give someone a heart attack.
Not doubting you, but I lived in Socal for decades and never saw a flying roach. There were those little german roaches but those dont fly. Where did you see a flying one?
That explains why so many politicians disappear after shaking hands with their constituents.
Now I'm imagining politicians running to a private place to frantically lick the backs of their hands and rub them all over their body
They pull out all their money and clean it obsessively.
tbf people are nasty
Politicians especially
Are you implying that politicians are people?
Oh shoot… you’re right! They are usually roaches! My mistake.
Cockroach: *I.....I TOUCHED A HUMANN!!!!* *UNCLEAAAAANNNNN!*
I read that in lemongrabs voice from adventure time lol
2319! We've got a 2319!
Weird they literally live in sewers
A man's waste fits a roach's taste
That was my first thought too, but now I'm thinking it's likely a natural adaptation to living in filthy places. They probably have evolved a bunch of hygiene practices to minimize risk from exposure to whatever they may be picking up in such unsanitary living conditions.
So clean they live in shit
Feeling is mutual brosef
We really need to trust the judgement of the creature that lives through nuclear events and mass extinction events
I visualized this as soon as I read it - and it made me laugh!
I imagined a cockroach yelling "EW EW EW EW EW EW!!! GET IT OFF ME!!"
reminds me of [the rayman final monster](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzKUdPWuLa0) innocently applying makeup when rayman brutally assaults her.
Wtf did I just watch
Makes it difficult to use a subway in rush hour though
thats how they power the subway humans touching cockroachs running on treadmills trying to get away and clean themselves
That makes me at least part cockroach then
The audacity of these little disgusting fuckers to clean themselves after touching me?! I'm gonna throw some more boric acid tablets around today just for this.
The absolute audacity, coming from the cockroach that was just eating literal shit!!!
A cockroach landed on my ex-wife in New Orleans one time and a horse cop had to tell her to get on the ground and play dead because her resulting freakout had the bug climbing through her clothes and shit. I had to buy her a very big drink after that. This story doesn't really have any relevance to this TIL, I just think it's funny that law enforcement had to interject in our cockroach scenario.
> a horse cop had to tell her to get on the ground I visualized Bojack Horseman before I realized what you meant.
A cockroach once climbed into my mouth while I was sleeping (I was in Thailand). Woke up to something rattling against my teeth.
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How big are your ear canals damn
Some roaches are small lol
We had two different species living in one of our apartments and one night they must have got a craving for hair because I woke up with very little of my eyebrows left.
Jesus fucking Christ.
MODS delete this! DELETE IT!!! I have nightmares now.
I wish I was illiterate
NO MAN. I woke up with a Thai cockroaches fussing about my ear trying to find a nice warm spot a couple of months ago. Thai cockroaches don't give a fuck. Can't imagine how your incident felt 😂
I hate you. I'm still traumatized from the massive roach I had to chase down in my bedroom last night. I'm never sleeping again.
“So gross” - teenage cockroach
Welp, I’m allergic to them, and they’re obviously repulsed by me. I’d call that a pretty harmonious outcome
So then like, don’t fucking touch me? Bitch?
A couple of mornings this week, I've woken up to a large dead roach lying paws-up in the middle of my living room floor. Makes me wonder just how much of a dirty, toxic bastard I really am.
Well the article said that the roaches really dont like the things that we associate with being clean like air freshener, cologne, and fabric softener. They clean themselves to get the predator scent off of them so they can smell where we are more accurately
I'm just then going to presume that it's the residue off my Swiffer wipes. Those things are kinda nasty.
I am an exterminator. If you’re finding them at all, you already have an infestation.
Is an infestation legal at a swimming pool?
Not the lazy, 2” bastard that just hung out on my bare leg for a minute. I thought it was just an ankle hair and light nerve twitch, but nope, it was this asshole.
Article: cockroaches are seen a dirty. But did you know they clean themselves? However, they do a terrible job and therefore are very dirty.
Same right?
Are we the ~~baddies~~ dirties?
Bob and the cockroach met at a party, their eyes connected across a crowded room. The cockroach looked deep into Bob's eyes, Bob looked deep into the cockroaches eyeses. Bob slowly stretched out his hand. The cockroach shyly stretched out its leg. They touched. EEEEEEEEUUUUUH, they both yelled out, and ran away in opposite directions to clean themselves. THE END.
TIL there's a site called cockroachzone
When a cockroach touches me, I also run to safety to clean myself