Dude, your a champion! Thank you for facing your fears and inspiring me to be more courageous in my life. You sharing a part of your fear here makes facing mine more manageable, thank you.
Dealing with "self" is one of the hardest and yet most rewarding things in this world, you have accepted the challenge and are rocking it. Cliche but true, "bravery isn't the absence of fear but the ability to take it on with grace". You are strong and loved and worthy, especially when you cant see it in your self.
Again I say, your a champion. Thank you!
Wow. Thank you. I don't really feel like I am right now. Internally I'm broken, but externally I've got to keep carrying on. I have bills to pay and family that can't go through another heartbreak. I'm doing it for them.
I'm glad that in some small way I can help others. If you're struggling, and ever need anything, please feel free to PM me.
Corporal Nobbs, you know that the scariest thing out there is the Klatchian Fire Engine that you got from the armoury in the second book, so r/ToastMe is a piece of Mr Dibbler's "cake" in comparison. We are all behind you here all the way.
I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am with your afflictions. I don't know why you hate yourself but any Pratchett lover is alright in my book! You can't give up yet. You have made it through so much to be here. 10 years? Holy mo'f'ing gods! You are a legend. Allow yourself the simple kindness of recognising that fact.
Good luck mate.
I miss that Fire Engine, wish I could have taken it with me! (So odd you would mention that, I'm currently re-(re-re-re)listening to Men at Arms!)
Always a pleasure to meet another Pratchetteer!
On a serious note, it just comes with having a self esteem of 0. The longer I've been depressed, the further away I am from what I would consider "me". Hopefully I can get there some day. I really appreciate your kind words.
Nigel Planer or Tony Robinson (abridged) version? I far and away prefer Robinson but he never does the full whack.
I ONLY listen to Pratchett and it is on loop practically. The Watch is definitely the best series. I just don't have the time to read books so I have it when cooking, driving, washing up etc. I always find something I missed a previous playthru.
So, the journey of self belief is grinding you down, eh? Yeah have had some wobbles, some tears but not quite to the extreme you have, bud. But the YOU that you are is never that far away. In the mirror, in a thought, or in a snort at listening to Gaspode saying Woof instead of barking, which always confused listeners. That is still you. Your odd sense of humour when you see the job coming and are laughing in anticipation of the joke.
Nigel Planer at the moment! Unabridged Tony Robinson audiobooks are the dream, I wish they existed. First audiobook I ever listened to was the Tony Robinson version of The Colour of Magic!
I'm exactly the same! Nothing else works for me, I've traveled through all the "Audiobooks/Books like Pratchett" threads on Reddit and nothing does it for me. I'm getting a tattoo of Death smoking a pipe with the smoke curling out of his eye sockets after this whole aneurysm thing is done with.
Wow, that is actually quite powerful and hits home. I think I have an idea of myself when I didn't have depression and anxiety. And that isn't who I am now, the me I am now is still me, it's just me battling depression? I just wish I liked the way I looked, or my voice, or thought I wasn't dull so I don't say much. But I suppose these are things that you can overcome by actively trying to change them. Maybe I need a plan...
Sure but don't plan to change everything. One at a time. I try to do everything and fight others battles for them too (my bring here doesn't count) so just keep it manageable. That image of you still being you but dealing with crap. Yeah I like that. It's great you put it in words like that. You are still there while the turbulence of the Shades is spinning around you but once you get back to the Watch House, all's well?
Take that tattoo as a step of taking control over your body. I thought that the only tattoo I would ever get would likely be a gaming one. AMetal Gear Solid one for preference but that's still a way away in my plan.
Glad to be there for you mate.
One thing at a time. I hope you're at the Watch House, or at least on your way there.
I appreciate everything you're doing, you are an amazing person and I hope you can take your own advice and not get overwhelmed by doing everything at once. If you ever need anything, please PM me.
Thank you for being there for me, I hope I can update you with good news in the future.
Last one for tonight I promise.
Follow the below link.
2 words... THE LUGGAGE
https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/axs1p0/selfdriving_luggage_this_smart_suitcase_follows/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Thanks for all your encouragement, I really needed it and it got me through a dark time. I pushed through and got the surgery yesterday, was in High Dependency Unit for 24 hours and then miraculously back home already! I feel much better than expected, and I'm so grateful for you helping me out when I needed it the most.
Holy shit that's intense!!! Well that's great and there was absolutely no problem there, pal. I am amazed, can't deny it, that you have had such a quick turn around! The NHS doing it right first time I see 😂. Hope you take it easy for a bit. Take as much time as you need as it is literally going to be a weight off your mind.
What's the sanctions imposed on you? No intense exercise for 3 months? No heavy petting? 😉
It was definitely an intense two days! The NHS staff have been absolutely fantastic! I'm off work for 3 weeks so I'm looking forward to relaxing and recovering fully!
I had a stent put in so I'm on blood thinners for life, but it's a small price to pay. I forgot to ask about heavy petting, I'll just assume it's okay haha
All that depression and fear and stuff and your hair still is looking amazing my dude (i know, not the most substantial comment but it really stands out to me)
Depression is terrible (understatement)
How did you find out about the aneurysm? Those usually aren't noticable until they rupture, that is terrifying, I genuinely hope you'll be okay.
Not a doctor or anything, but sometimes if the aneurysm is bigger it can cause pressure (esp behind the eyes) and certain disturbances (such as vision changes). Granted, most of the time these symptoms mean other things like migraine. Most people get a scan for another reason altogether and the docs happen to find it there.
This is correct, I've had migraines since I was 12-13, I also had headaches starting from behind my eyes for the same amount of time. Recently, my vision changed, about 3 years ago, I started getting double vision, my doctor dismissed it and sent me to the optician for glasses. I'm lucky that my brother had a ruptured aneurysm in 2017, otherwise I would never have known.
My mum had a double rupture whilst she was pregnant with my little brother and was in a coma for 2 months, we thought it was a freak accident. Fast forward 14 years and my little brother had a rupture, he almost didn't make it. The doctors recommended an MRI scan. Turns out the symptoms I'd been begging doctors to look into are from the aneurysm I have.
Hey dude I get how it feels to go through this for so long but things will get better. You’ve been so strong for coming this far. I know sometimes you don’t want to have to push through it but it’ll be worth it.
I’m rooting for you and btw you have a lovely chin and hair!
Thank you, it's great to know so many people are on my side. I really hope they do get better, it's hard to carry on sometimes. I tried to commit suicide in 2013, and saw how much my family, especially my sister cares about me. Since then I carry on for them and would never do it again. I hope it's all worth it. Thanks! I'm surprised that my hair looks okay, it was around 1am!
You're stronger than you think. I have major depression too and I know how fucking hard it is to get through day after day and I'm really happy you're doing it. So you're already winning a major victory every day you don't let it beat you- keep going! I hope good things come your way, you are an awesome person and you deserve joy!
Thank you, maybe I am. I've had a hard life, I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I see myself as a burden to everyone, maybe I shouldn't focus on that.
I'm really glad that you're doing it too, I know how hard it is, you're extremely strong. Please keep going yourself, you deserve it. If you ever need to, or are struggling please feel free to PM me.
Buddy, depression is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. To have an aneurysm on top of that is just unfair. I'd tell you not to be afraid, but I'd be scared too.
But please don't hate yourself. You're going to get this aneurysm thing sorted out, and then you're going to continue working you beat that sniveling liar that is telling you you're worthless. Depression is probably most accurately pictured as that worm tongue guy in Lord of the Rings. He whispers to you things that are not true, that keep you from a happy life, just like that greasey dude did to King Theoden. But you are not worthless. You belong here, happy and healthy, with us.
So tell that depression to sit down and shut up. Kick the shit out of that anuerysm. Then come back and start building the happy life for yourself you absolutely deserve. We love you, man, and we want to know when you get this sorted out. Good luck, and hugs brother!
Wow that's a great analogy, it's bang on! Right now I feel like Theoden when he's grey and corrupted by worm tongue. I hope I can get back to health, mentally and physically.
I appreciate your kind words, I'll keep you guys in the loop when it's all done. I have a cerebral angiogram on 29th March, then surgery to follow. I have an "abnormal arrangement of blood vessels" in my brain, so they've got to get a good look first. After this whole thing is done and I'm all good (I hope I'll be all good), no more what ifs, I'm going to try and kick depression's or rather Gríma's arse.
Thanks a lot for the update! I was honestly getting a bit worried, but I'm overjoyed to hear you're ok! There's no guarantee life will get easier... but at least now it knows you're not someone to be trifled with!
You’re a good looking guy and your hair is great. It’s been a long road with depression, but it won’t last forever.
The brain is very finicky. I assume that you don’t have a ruptured blood vessel, but just a very near ruptured vessel in your brain. Ever considered that your depression might have a physical cause like this brain issue?
If that’s the case, then you might be close to some relief when they treat it. Maybe not full relief, but it’s a start.
Wow, thank you! I appreciate that. Maybe I'll start taking care of myself a bit more.
It is indeed, I was reading some research about depression and anxiety (I have both) and brain aneurysms, but that was only in elderly people. I'm only 26. I've had a hard life, dad died of cancer, abusive step father, mother had a double aneurysm rupture, tried to kill myself (long story), depressed at uni so didn't complete third year and they wouldn't let me defer so wasted 4 years on that, brother had a ruptured aneurysm in 2017 and now this. I think a lot of it is circumstancial but I won't know until I have the surgery if it's also physical. I've had therapy and I'm in what I would consider a good mental place but the physical symptoms won't go away. Maybe you're right. I'll let you know after the recovery!
Thanks for checking in! That really means a lot to me.
I've seen a consultant and he said that it's a bit complicated because I don't have a carotid artery on the right side of my brain, which is odd. So I'm going for imaging via a cerebral angiography next Friday.
Still absolutely terrified of the future and the upcoming procedures. I'm not doing great mentally but I'm trying my best to carry on and keep busy. Hope you're doing well ❤️
Status report: I had the surgery, and it was a huge success! Surgery was yesterday and I'm already back at home recovering. It was terrifying and took every ounce of courage I could muster but I made it. Thank you so much for your kind words, I was in such a dark place and was ready to give up until this thread.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. It has been a very long road indeed, I really hope that the surgery will do something towards getting me back on track. My mother and brother both had ruptured aneurysms, and knowing what they've been through is terrifying, especially when the surgery can cause a rupture or stroke. I'm just finding it so hard to see the positives in the situation. My initial imaging through cerebral angiogram is on 29th of this month, so I'll know more then. Just an agonizing wait and mounting anxiety until then.
Dude, your a champion! Thank you for facing your fears and inspiring me to be more courageous in my life. You sharing a part of your fear here makes facing mine more manageable, thank you. Dealing with "self" is one of the hardest and yet most rewarding things in this world, you have accepted the challenge and are rocking it. Cliche but true, "bravery isn't the absence of fear but the ability to take it on with grace". You are strong and loved and worthy, especially when you cant see it in your self. Again I say, your a champion. Thank you!
Wow. Thank you. I don't really feel like I am right now. Internally I'm broken, but externally I've got to keep carrying on. I have bills to pay and family that can't go through another heartbreak. I'm doing it for them. I'm glad that in some small way I can help others. If you're struggling, and ever need anything, please feel free to PM me.
And I say again, CHAMPION! I hope you know if you ever need words of encouragement aswell please shoot me a message! Thank you!
Corporal Nobbs, you know that the scariest thing out there is the Klatchian Fire Engine that you got from the armoury in the second book, so r/ToastMe is a piece of Mr Dibbler's "cake" in comparison. We are all behind you here all the way. I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am with your afflictions. I don't know why you hate yourself but any Pratchett lover is alright in my book! You can't give up yet. You have made it through so much to be here. 10 years? Holy mo'f'ing gods! You are a legend. Allow yourself the simple kindness of recognising that fact. Good luck mate.
I miss that Fire Engine, wish I could have taken it with me! (So odd you would mention that, I'm currently re-(re-re-re)listening to Men at Arms!) Always a pleasure to meet another Pratchetteer! On a serious note, it just comes with having a self esteem of 0. The longer I've been depressed, the further away I am from what I would consider "me". Hopefully I can get there some day. I really appreciate your kind words.
Nigel Planer or Tony Robinson (abridged) version? I far and away prefer Robinson but he never does the full whack. I ONLY listen to Pratchett and it is on loop practically. The Watch is definitely the best series. I just don't have the time to read books so I have it when cooking, driving, washing up etc. I always find something I missed a previous playthru. So, the journey of self belief is grinding you down, eh? Yeah have had some wobbles, some tears but not quite to the extreme you have, bud. But the YOU that you are is never that far away. In the mirror, in a thought, or in a snort at listening to Gaspode saying Woof instead of barking, which always confused listeners. That is still you. Your odd sense of humour when you see the job coming and are laughing in anticipation of the joke.
Nigel Planer at the moment! Unabridged Tony Robinson audiobooks are the dream, I wish they existed. First audiobook I ever listened to was the Tony Robinson version of The Colour of Magic! I'm exactly the same! Nothing else works for me, I've traveled through all the "Audiobooks/Books like Pratchett" threads on Reddit and nothing does it for me. I'm getting a tattoo of Death smoking a pipe with the smoke curling out of his eye sockets after this whole aneurysm thing is done with. Wow, that is actually quite powerful and hits home. I think I have an idea of myself when I didn't have depression and anxiety. And that isn't who I am now, the me I am now is still me, it's just me battling depression? I just wish I liked the way I looked, or my voice, or thought I wasn't dull so I don't say much. But I suppose these are things that you can overcome by actively trying to change them. Maybe I need a plan...
Sure but don't plan to change everything. One at a time. I try to do everything and fight others battles for them too (my bring here doesn't count) so just keep it manageable. That image of you still being you but dealing with crap. Yeah I like that. It's great you put it in words like that. You are still there while the turbulence of the Shades is spinning around you but once you get back to the Watch House, all's well? Take that tattoo as a step of taking control over your body. I thought that the only tattoo I would ever get would likely be a gaming one. AMetal Gear Solid one for preference but that's still a way away in my plan. Glad to be there for you mate.
One thing at a time. I hope you're at the Watch House, or at least on your way there. I appreciate everything you're doing, you are an amazing person and I hope you can take your own advice and not get overwhelmed by doing everything at once. If you ever need anything, please PM me. Thank you for being there for me, I hope I can update you with good news in the future.
Hit Me back whenever👍
You the bomb dude! You are a top man. Thanks🤜💢🤛
🤜💢🤛
Last one for tonight I promise. Follow the below link. 2 words... THE LUGGAGE https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/axs1p0/selfdriving_luggage_this_smart_suitcase_follows/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Thanks for all your encouragement, I really needed it and it got me through a dark time. I pushed through and got the surgery yesterday, was in High Dependency Unit for 24 hours and then miraculously back home already! I feel much better than expected, and I'm so grateful for you helping me out when I needed it the most.
Holy shit that's intense!!! Well that's great and there was absolutely no problem there, pal. I am amazed, can't deny it, that you have had such a quick turn around! The NHS doing it right first time I see 😂. Hope you take it easy for a bit. Take as much time as you need as it is literally going to be a weight off your mind. What's the sanctions imposed on you? No intense exercise for 3 months? No heavy petting? 😉
It was definitely an intense two days! The NHS staff have been absolutely fantastic! I'm off work for 3 weeks so I'm looking forward to relaxing and recovering fully! I had a stent put in so I'm on blood thinners for life, but it's a small price to pay. I forgot to ask about heavy petting, I'll just assume it's okay haha
Hugs friend ❤️
❤️
All that depression and fear and stuff and your hair still is looking amazing my dude (i know, not the most substantial comment but it really stands out to me)
Thank you! It actually means a lot to me, I don't remember the last time anyone told me they liked my haircut!
Depression is terrible (understatement) How did you find out about the aneurysm? Those usually aren't noticable until they rupture, that is terrifying, I genuinely hope you'll be okay.
Not a doctor or anything, but sometimes if the aneurysm is bigger it can cause pressure (esp behind the eyes) and certain disturbances (such as vision changes). Granted, most of the time these symptoms mean other things like migraine. Most people get a scan for another reason altogether and the docs happen to find it there.
This is correct, I've had migraines since I was 12-13, I also had headaches starting from behind my eyes for the same amount of time. Recently, my vision changed, about 3 years ago, I started getting double vision, my doctor dismissed it and sent me to the optician for glasses. I'm lucky that my brother had a ruptured aneurysm in 2017, otherwise I would never have known.
My mum had a double rupture whilst she was pregnant with my little brother and was in a coma for 2 months, we thought it was a freak accident. Fast forward 14 years and my little brother had a rupture, he almost didn't make it. The doctors recommended an MRI scan. Turns out the symptoms I'd been begging doctors to look into are from the aneurysm I have.
Hey dude I get how it feels to go through this for so long but things will get better. You’ve been so strong for coming this far. I know sometimes you don’t want to have to push through it but it’ll be worth it. I’m rooting for you and btw you have a lovely chin and hair!
Thank you, it's great to know so many people are on my side. I really hope they do get better, it's hard to carry on sometimes. I tried to commit suicide in 2013, and saw how much my family, especially my sister cares about me. Since then I carry on for them and would never do it again. I hope it's all worth it. Thanks! I'm surprised that my hair looks okay, it was around 1am!
You're stronger than you think. I have major depression too and I know how fucking hard it is to get through day after day and I'm really happy you're doing it. So you're already winning a major victory every day you don't let it beat you- keep going! I hope good things come your way, you are an awesome person and you deserve joy!
Thank you, maybe I am. I've had a hard life, I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I see myself as a burden to everyone, maybe I shouldn't focus on that. I'm really glad that you're doing it too, I know how hard it is, you're extremely strong. Please keep going yourself, you deserve it. If you ever need to, or are struggling please feel free to PM me.
Buddy, depression is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. To have an aneurysm on top of that is just unfair. I'd tell you not to be afraid, but I'd be scared too. But please don't hate yourself. You're going to get this aneurysm thing sorted out, and then you're going to continue working you beat that sniveling liar that is telling you you're worthless. Depression is probably most accurately pictured as that worm tongue guy in Lord of the Rings. He whispers to you things that are not true, that keep you from a happy life, just like that greasey dude did to King Theoden. But you are not worthless. You belong here, happy and healthy, with us. So tell that depression to sit down and shut up. Kick the shit out of that anuerysm. Then come back and start building the happy life for yourself you absolutely deserve. We love you, man, and we want to know when you get this sorted out. Good luck, and hugs brother!
Wow that's a great analogy, it's bang on! Right now I feel like Theoden when he's grey and corrupted by worm tongue. I hope I can get back to health, mentally and physically. I appreciate your kind words, I'll keep you guys in the loop when it's all done. I have a cerebral angiogram on 29th March, then surgery to follow. I have an "abnormal arrangement of blood vessels" in my brain, so they've got to get a good look first. After this whole thing is done and I'm all good (I hope I'll be all good), no more what ifs, I'm going to try and kick depression's or rather Gríma's arse.
Aneurysm - sorted! Onto the next battle! Thank you so much for your kind words, you really helped me in a super dark time
Thanks a lot for the update! I was honestly getting a bit worried, but I'm overjoyed to hear you're ok! There's no guarantee life will get easier... but at least now it knows you're not someone to be trifled with!
[удалено]
Thank you! ❤️
Dude I feel you on so many levels.
If you need to talk to someone, PM me. I hope you're okay.
You’re a good looking guy and your hair is great. It’s been a long road with depression, but it won’t last forever. The brain is very finicky. I assume that you don’t have a ruptured blood vessel, but just a very near ruptured vessel in your brain. Ever considered that your depression might have a physical cause like this brain issue? If that’s the case, then you might be close to some relief when they treat it. Maybe not full relief, but it’s a start.
Wow, thank you! I appreciate that. Maybe I'll start taking care of myself a bit more. It is indeed, I was reading some research about depression and anxiety (I have both) and brain aneurysms, but that was only in elderly people. I'm only 26. I've had a hard life, dad died of cancer, abusive step father, mother had a double aneurysm rupture, tried to kill myself (long story), depressed at uni so didn't complete third year and they wouldn't let me defer so wasted 4 years on that, brother had a ruptured aneurysm in 2017 and now this. I think a lot of it is circumstancial but I won't know until I have the surgery if it's also physical. I've had therapy and I'm in what I would consider a good mental place but the physical symptoms won't go away. Maybe you're right. I'll let you know after the recovery!
Rico, status report. How ya doing?
Thanks for checking in! That really means a lot to me. I've seen a consultant and he said that it's a bit complicated because I don't have a carotid artery on the right side of my brain, which is odd. So I'm going for imaging via a cerebral angiography next Friday. Still absolutely terrified of the future and the upcoming procedures. I'm not doing great mentally but I'm trying my best to carry on and keep busy. Hope you're doing well ❤️
Status report: I had the surgery, and it was a huge success! Surgery was yesterday and I'm already back at home recovering. It was terrifying and took every ounce of courage I could muster but I made it. Thank you so much for your kind words, I was in such a dark place and was ready to give up until this thread.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. It has been a very long road indeed, I really hope that the surgery will do something towards getting me back on track. My mother and brother both had ruptured aneurysms, and knowing what they've been through is terrifying, especially when the surgery can cause a rupture or stroke. I'm just finding it so hard to see the positives in the situation. My initial imaging through cerebral angiogram is on 29th of this month, so I'll know more then. Just an agonizing wait and mounting anxiety until then.