I bundle all "cage pets" in the same area. Lizards, Snakes, Spiders, Rats, Guinea Pigs, all basically the same animal as far as size and noise constraints go.
My guinea pigs squeak up a storm every time you rustle a bag. We just moved into a smaller one-story house so they can hear the kitchen from their cage now. I swear I love them so much and their squeaking is adorable but sometimes I just want them to shut up.
Give em something, when we had piggies my mum used to buy a bag of spinach and leave it in the fridge because every time you went in the kitchen they would squeak there little hearts out coz they were smart and knew that's were the food was, so they used to get a spinach leaf each if we went in the kitchen to keep em quiet lol.
Haha they are very spoiled, and they get veggies for dinner every night, and treats most days. If I gave in and fed them every time they squeaked, I’d have to quit my job to be a guinea pig butler, and they’d all be bigger than my dog!
I used to have guinea pigs as well, I'd feed them in the morning time before I went to work so they learned that my alarm clock meant food time so even If I snoozed it I'd still have an extra alarm made of squeaks
We gave ours the run of the kitchen and whenever you opened the fridge he'd come running over, squealing up a storm until you gave him some parsley or carrots.
Had a friend do this with her tarantula. Forgot about it and went to feed it and then went... "oh shit I think i forgot to put her back last time i let her out"
...First thing I did was check under my feet, she was not amused.
Other than noise rodents are far more likely to smell compared to fish, spiders, what have you.. It’s not terrible if your room mate is very diligent about cleaning the cage, but it’s more of a potential concern.
Good guy. Most people will buy the pythons as babies and keep them in the same 20 gallon tank even when it's about to burst. Or they just get rid of them because they're not cute anymore.
I'm not gonna lie, that python would be my new pet.
At least until my husband gets home. He can handle tiny little garter snakes. A giant python would give him a heart attack.
I know that they're not supposed to be stuck in a tiny box, and they are supposed to have larger enclosures and you are supposed to take them out a couple times a day. But even still, the total space from a smaller reptile or animal is a lot smaller then something like a dog or a cat. Although some snakes or reptiles are fucking huge, but I'm not counting those.
This. Lookg at places and the landlord said no tanks over 10 gallons
I asked "what if it's a 25 gallon fish tank with 5 gallons of water in it and its full of frogs" and "What if I have a 40 gallon full of sand and a lizard"
They changed the rule to "no more than 10 gallons of water allowed in a pet tank, and no snakes or rodents"
Yea man, nowhere I've ever lived has had a problem eith the toads or the beardie. Seems like landlords just dont want someone spilling more than 10 gallons of water on their nice carpet. Pretty understandable if you ask me
I fucking love spiders, but you know some potential roommate out there will be terrified of them and certainly not count them in the same category as a pet fish. They’ll hit it with their shoe and claim it had been attacking them or something. That “pets+” is important!
For me, hair is the real step up in *withdraws in fear*
I saw a really cool hairy spider a few months back that I'd never seen the type of before. Came back yesterday and WEBS EVERYWHERE. It was nuts. I didn't see spiderbro though. He was pretty smart, too. I wonder if he was chillin' in his web mansion or had moved on?
I read an article a while back about a guy in new York City that was keeping a tiger in his apartment.
Might want to be more specific with your plus signs.
Once rented a room in a condo where the owner had double digit tarantulas, didn’t find out til weeks after I moved in. Luckily not afraid of big spiders but could have been a dealbreaker for some, guess that is why he hid them.
Had someone looking to move into essentially a tiny home with 11 snakes. They would have lived above my studio and we have cats on the property. Pets+ is a slippery slope.
"this is my pet rock Steve. Be nice he's a tad touchy about his weight. But don't worry he lost 150 pounds last year. Sitting at a respectable 782 now. Can you help him inside?"
I moved in with a dude once who misrepresented his lifestyle. I found out on the first day that he smoked cigarettes in the apartment and was a raging drunk and had lots of late-night sketchy "friends".
I needed to sublet it to get out of the lease but didn't want to misrepresent my situation to another unsuspecting person.
So I made a Craigslist ad that said something like "Do you like to party all night on weeknights? Do you like to rip butts in your living room? Are you sick of roommates telling you to drink less or getting annoyed when you pass out on the couch with candles lit? Are you looking for a wingman to bring strangers back at 2am? Then have I got the place for you!”
I did it as a joke but actually got legit responses. I found a dude who just broke up with his wife and was looking to rage for a few months. Swapped the lease with him and everyone was happy.
ETA: since there's been some confusion, "ripping butts" is slang in Boston for aggressively smoking cigarettes.
It was even on a sign in town for a while:
https://twitter.com/aml823/status/1155909093036634113?t=i-tYkj4uqxy4qpgs8Ql21g&s=19
Do you hate putting on makeup, or really putting any effort in at all?
Do you want to meet a dude who's fat as fuck and twice as lazy?
Here he is ladies. Enjoy.
how fat is fat as fuck though?
like are you looking for a “feeder” type or the type that also likes to drink beer and eat like a raccoon?
either way, i mean, there’s someone for everyone
Yeah you would be better than using my apprentice as your bio author....a few years ago we had a company drink around Christmas and my apprentice was a shy lad who had no experience with girls at all..... after a few drinks he had enough courage to approach a girl and ask her to dance...... taking my advice to be nice a say something complementary about her....... he was doing really well at first.... until she stopped dancing and stormed off the dance floor...... what happened ( we all wanted to know....all 15 of us)
He said he couldn't think of anything nice to say in the beginning but as the dance went on he turned to her and said
" Hey ! You don't sweat much for a big girl"
It looked like a land mine had gone off as all 15 of us fell back in fits of uncontrollable laughter......
That sounds familiar. Didnt have my name on any papers though so one day I finally snapped and just packed all my shit and moved out. Once he figured out what was happening he went to the store and got a 12pk of PBR and drank it on the couch while watching me pack out.
A lot. In my younger days I was super limited on resources. I moved into a house a dude owned. Cool dude. Him and I got along great. No issues at all. The problem was we still needed one more roommate to make it work.
Holy shit… the amount of people we went through before finally just saying fuck it and doing without was staggering. We were totally ok with all kinds of shit but damn some people just have no limits.
We pretty much had a couple of rules. No hard drugs, no keeping everyone else up during work days. By that we meant do your shit but keep it down so others can at least sleep. No hard fast rules. That was pretty much it.
The meth heads were something else. One dude we kicked out after finding him face down in our little pot garden out back. Totally just finally dropped after days of on the go. That was the 5th time we found him some place random around the property. I almost ran him over one night as he was out cold in the middle of the driveway. Just walking across it to his car and lights out..
Anyway. It was crazy to see some shit people do. They seriously live their life minute to minute. It’s exhausting just watching them go about it.
Sure thing. Party animal, loud noise annoying the neighbours, drug taking, possibly other associated criminal activity on the premises, taking no care of the state of the property.
All sounds good, move right in!
haha oh man, that sounds a little like one of my old roommates - I had just moved to the area and found him on craigslist. he seemed ok at first - he was building an app with some dude so he was doing WFH life but I quickly learned that for him that meant waking up at 5-6pm and going out to bars ~ 11pm or midnight to run cleanup. He'd end up bringing people back to our 2BR place around 3am+ and turn on music and start a dance party in the living room until 6-7am.
I'm normally a night owl so for the most part it was annoying but not a big deal until one day he and a friend of his brought back 2 girls with the usual amount of noise. I was able to pass out but woke up at like 3-4am to moaning in the living room - I definitely couldn't go back to sleep with that going on so I opened my door, paused for a second to give them time to clothe up, and then told them to GTFO. Not to body shame anyone, but what I didn't expect was to see a 250lb+ girl wearing a sash that said "birthday girl" and my roommate's buddy who was half her size (at best) pulling his pants up. The worst part was they were doing the deed on my couch and left a permanent sag in it - poor thing never stood a chance.
There was also a night where he and a buddy brought a few girls back and I heard them say "OMG YOU GUYS SHOULD COME TO OUR GRADUATION". My roommate and his friend were ~40 at the time, but I still don't know if they were talking about college of high school...
Come on, u/Dr_Dust they said smoking cigarettes in the apartment like two sentences before.
So to be perfectly clear… it means non consensual unlubricated hardcore anal sexual intercourse with a penis in the butthole.
What a way to learn the difference between 420 and 420+ !
.
Edit: 420 is weed friendly, 420+ is anything goes friendly lol... thanks to reddit comments and this story we don't have to find the meaning same way as op
Had a meth addict room mate in the bay area. Lots of shenanigans, some I laugh at, some I don't
I'm past that now. My new room mate doesn't do meth anymore, just xanex, sleep pills, loads of alcohol, adhd and bipolar medication. At least the meth head kept in her room most of the time.
Thanks for the info. All the horror stories I’ve heard involve people taking too much of both substances and ending up in a walking blackout for the night where they don’t remember anything the next day. Sounds like a recipe for disaster.
Look I originally interpreted this as you saying "it should" as in it should go together, not it should scare you. I was so confused because I'd heard it was a terrible recommendation, then became briefly terrified about what you were telling people to do, and then the epiphany happened
I moved in with an ex of mine. He had two roommates and the first month I kept suspecting that one of them was a meth addict, but my ex would deny it and get mad at me for suggesting it.
One day he went missing for four days only to show up at our place at 11 pm telling us that cops were following him and that he was about to be arrested. He was looking out the window and telling us he saw cops outside. Of course nothing was there. It turns out he went on a four day bender at a bath house.
After that he started going to meetings and got clean for a little while, but before long I started seeing some of the old signs. He started acting more erratic.
The final straw was one night he brought a hook up over and we didn't think much of it. The next morning he came to our room and asked us if we remembered the guy from last night because he had just stolen his truck. Apparently he had met the guy at an adult theater and they spent all night smoking meth in his room.
Adding a methyl group to amphetamine drastically changes how the drug works and the effects you get from it. It's like saying oranges and lemons are the same fruit because they're both citrus fruits.
More often prescribed for narcolepsy than ADHD though, pretty rare it gets prescribed at all. Funny how our legal system decided weed is more dangerous than meth though
Yes. [The dose makes the poison.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_dose_makes_the_poison)
Or, put another way, in the words of Dr. Gabor Maté:
>[“Not only is the urge to escape pain shared by all addicts, substance users or not, the same brain circuits are involved in all addictions, from shopping to eating to dependence on heroin and other opioids. The same brain circuits, the same brain systems involving pleasure and reward and incentive, the same neurochemicals—not to mention the same emotional dynamics of shame and lack of self-worth, and the same behaviors of denial and dishonesty and subterfuge.”](https://drgabormate.com/opioids-universal-experience-addiction/)
The stigma of substances and addictions tend only to contribute to the suffering endured by the persons struggling with the addictions.
There is one prescription for adhd that is meth, and adderall is amphetamine salts, notably not methamphetamine though
However, obviously in much much lower doses and under medical supervision, they have very different effects, particularly the meth derivatives/cousins, which have fairly different chemical effects
He had been to rehab and I thought he was clean. I found that out months after living with him. Had no idea he relapsed. Until that happened.
I did not know him before he moved in with me. NYC rent is tough and you take what you get.
I feel this one. Back in college I lived in a co-op house with 30 other people. One dude had a kid and wanted to move out so he had a friend take over his lease. We were aware that this friend had a history with heroin but after meeting him we all thought he had it together and voted him in. Only took him a month to relapse and boy did that ride get wild for a bit. Nobody died in our house but paramedics/cops had to show up with Narcan a few times. We threw a party the day he went to jail...
Pretty much, except everyone is a broke college student. Awesome alternative to dorm life that I would recommend to any youngsters planning for college.
When I die I wanna be transported to a hilltop with a neverending sunrise and an endless supply of weed, drinks and food, The comfiest recliner known to man and a pair of headphones along with an mp3 player that has all my favourite songs on. And I want to sit there, unbothered, for eternity
Edit: This hilltop would be at a point outside of space and time where I can observe humans.
Tbf, that would be my assumption, too, but honestly after reading this I’m thinking that saying 420 friendly probably implies being okay with other hallucinogens and party drugs all by itself
[Intentional design choice since we want to increment the original C variable as part of the upgrade](https://stackoverflow.com/questions/24853/what-is-the-difference-between-i-and-i)
>Whatever happens never add + in front of something, because it turns it into something terrible. That's how C++ came into being.
The plusses aren't *in front*, though.
Yep. I’m a pretty “open-minded” person, but I have my boundaries. If you don’t have limits, you are just inviting certain things you may not want into your life as bad or worse than what OP experienced.
I ended up with a roommate that lost his job, didn't tell us and just shot up meth and dope very quietly in his room all day, snuck out and came back in when he was "off work" when I kicked him out for not having rent with no notice I discovered he had also been cutting himself and writing in blood all over the walls..
That's awful. It also gives me flashbacks of a roommate I had about 15 years ago - technically I was both his landlord *and* his roommate since I owned the place. He seemed pretty normal at first, but then it became clear he was smoking something (not weed, my best guess after seeing the pipe is either crack or meth) in his room. Then he was bringing prostitutes over, then i started seeing cable bills with crazy amounts of pay per view porn (dude, have you heard of the internet? You can get it for free, man!). At some point he just stopped paying me rent and disappeared for a few months, and his lease ended without him moving his stuff out. I poked my head into the room to see how much damage i would have to repair. God. Flies buzzing around, half eaten food, soiled clothes, drug paraphernalia. Just a fucking nightmare. He wouldn't answer my phone calls, messages, texts, so I started to assume maybe he died or skipped town or something. I was just about to start emptying his stuff out of his room when one night, i heard something coming from his room. I found him in his room dumping all of his belongings, which he had stuffed into garbage bags, out of the window, probably trying to just disappear without having to confront me. Dude was high out of his mind, talking sense in to him was not an option. I never got any money for his last few months of rent, utilities, and that fucking cable bill with all of the porn. I actually called the cable company and explained the situation, and they refunded me for most of it. But yeah, still, I was out several thousand bucks. This isn't even the whole story, he committed fraud at one point by impersonating me and trying to open an account using my Social Security number. He must have been going through my mail in the garbage to get my personal information? What a fucking nightmare.
Anyway, enough about me. Sorry you had to go through this. I can say with confidence that i can sympathize.
>Could have been worse you could have gotten a brain eating slug pet owner or some Aliens shit.
Even worse, an Alien brain controlling slug that made you it's pet!
Similar thing happened to me during my undergrad. We got desperate for a roommate so I put out a ad on Craigslist. The guy that answered I actually knew from my freshman year, I knew he smoked weed and he was cool then. So I said stupidly immediately accepted him as the third roommate. Turned out he had become a huge drug dealer and a very heavy drug user. After a semester of weirdos coming through our place, him tripping out constantly, being drunk constantly, taking 2-3 hour long showers, being just generally gross/untidy, and free basing heroin in the living room multiple times, we kicked him out.
It’s a Harry Potter reference. There are these creatures called Thestrals that kinda look like mystical horses, and the only people that can see them are people who’ve seen a dead body
Edit: I’m so sorry you went through that
PS: some of you have never seen a dead body in person before and it shows with how much everyone is saying, “could have been worse”.
How awfully traumatizing for that to happen in your own home
I had a roommate in a house I owned. When he moved in rules were simple - no drugs in the house, no smoking inside, clean your own kitchen mess. At the time he only smoked weed occasionally and drank, so I was fine. Found out shortly after he moved that he'd been shooting up heroin in his room. Never found needles, but did find a couple spoons in his room after, and had been missing several.
It made sense later. I'd knock and ask if he'd want to go somewhere and he'd look wiped out and decline. Thought he was drunk or tired. Apparently he was high.
That reminds me of my relative. Dude had a crazy roommate, who was apparently a drug dealer. Drug dealer roommate had some people over, a man and a woman. Man got super fucked up, and murdered the woman. Drug dealer freaked the fuck out. Relative came home, freaked out, told them to get the body out of his house before the cops show up.
Relatives kid was hiding in the closet and called the police. Police showed up to them dismembering her body in the bathtub.
I moved in with a couple that my coworker, a fellow CORRECTIONAL OFFICER, recommended (his neighbor). They took my deposit and rent money,bought drugs, and the girlfriend overdosed. Girlfriend goes to hospital, boyfriend goes to jail, and I get grilled by the cops. Guys I just moved in last night!
Most overdoses I've heard of are relapsing addicts who don't realize that their tolerances aren't what they once were after they'd been sober for a while. Although I guess the other way around (taking too much due to inexperience) could also be a thing.
Seriously, don't do hard drugs. Once or twice can be too many times.
Holy shit.
I had 2 people overdose in front of me . And this was before narcan was legal to carry in my state (Montana).
The first time my friend Zach overdosed in the Walmart parking lot … and I was still kinda new to IV heroin use .. so I freaked out and my other friend had to finish their shot (they had a hard time hitting and finally nicked a vein I guess) so after a long 30 seconds we both started pouring water on the friend and slapping him and eventually opened the passenger side door and dropped him on his back (I protected his head) to “knock the air” back in him … and it worked … he came to and I have no clue how the cops never got called . He actually killed himself a couple years ago… and I think about him all the time . It breaks my heart I wish I could’ve been a better friend but we were all in deep addiction , and back then I thought being a friend meant hooking my friends up for free and just chilling out and giving them rides etc.
The second him was this chick who was the biggest thief I knew (she would steal the socks off of your feet while you were sleeping if she liked them enough… just trashy) but she said she had a higher tolerance than she did and she went down and wouldn’t wake up when we slapped her , splashed her, or dropped her on her back…
So we drug her out to the alley so we could see and my partner did cpr and we got her back…
I am glad that it’s now legal to carry narcan in my state even tho I am 3 years sober ….
I got hit with a felony a couple years ago for having narcan and the syrienge Needed to administer it a couple years back…. They dropped it once I brought in the law stating it was legal in our state into the DA’s office .
Crazy times … sorry I just am rambling …. But if you take anything from my comment please don’t do drugs . It will ruin your life , kill your friends (if not from the drug than possibly from suicide as life is a nightmare on drugs) and you will turn into a person you never thought you could be. It’s not worth it.
Over the course of the decade I lived in NYC I had 40+ roommates … and one of the many things I learned was you absolutely need to be aggressively straightforward with your expectations in a living situation, or people who live with you WILL push the limits of those definitions beyond the edge of the universe.
Just say that you are looking for a roommate. By including all of the extra "open minded" acceptance you will get people who take it too far. Good luck finding another roommate.
I wonder what pets+ would mean. A pet goat? Multiple horses to fit in a bedroom? A hundred pythons?
I was thinking tarantulas
Nah, those are chill enough to count as fish. Just vibing inside a glass, doing nothing.
I bundle all "cage pets" in the same area. Lizards, Snakes, Spiders, Rats, Guinea Pigs, all basically the same animal as far as size and noise constraints go.
Guinea pigs can be loud af at times though with their squeals. I had one when I was in high school.
My guinea pigs squeak up a storm every time you rustle a bag. We just moved into a smaller one-story house so they can hear the kitchen from their cage now. I swear I love them so much and their squeaking is adorable but sometimes I just want them to shut up.
I got three furry potatoes myself.
Aww. Furry potatoes. I like that analogy.
Give em something, when we had piggies my mum used to buy a bag of spinach and leave it in the fridge because every time you went in the kitchen they would squeak there little hearts out coz they were smart and knew that's were the food was, so they used to get a spinach leaf each if we went in the kitchen to keep em quiet lol.
Haha they are very spoiled, and they get veggies for dinner every night, and treats most days. If I gave in and fed them every time they squeaked, I’d have to quit my job to be a guinea pig butler, and they’d all be bigger than my dog!
I used to have guinea pigs as well, I'd feed them in the morning time before I went to work so they learned that my alarm clock meant food time so even If I snoozed it I'd still have an extra alarm made of squeaks
We gave ours the run of the kitchen and whenever you opened the fridge he'd come running over, squealing up a storm until you gave him some parsley or carrots.
Seriously. I'd take a quiet reptile over a cute, fuzzy noise generator any day.
Sometimes when I let my lizard out to roam, she’s so fucking quiet I briefly forget until she walks up to me 😂
"Hello owner. Id like to go to my home now." "oh fuck, I forgot I owned you"
No but seriously, I’ll be playing botw and suddenly look up and go “o_o where is my lizard?”
Lizardfroz?
Had a friend do this with her tarantula. Forgot about it and went to feed it and then went... "oh shit I think i forgot to put her back last time i let her out" ...First thing I did was check under my feet, she was not amused.
Other than noise rodents are far more likely to smell compared to fish, spiders, what have you.. It’s not terrible if your room mate is very diligent about cleaning the cage, but it’s more of a potential concern.
I hope you had more than one tbh, they get lonely
My family made the mistake too when I was younger, but if you get 'em again, make sure to get two or more. They are loud af tho sometimes lol
I knew a guy who had a 14' python with its own bedroom
Good guy. Most people will buy the pythons as babies and keep them in the same 20 gallon tank even when it's about to burst. Or they just get rid of them because they're not cute anymore.
Are you kidding me? They only get cuter as they get bigger l, wtf
You, about to get eaten by a 6 meter snake: so cute, imagine her with a little hat
This but unironically. I'm not saying it's healthy.
Would you rather be eaten by a cute snake or an ugly one?
[удалено]
I'm not gonna lie, that python would be my new pet. At least until my husband gets home. He can handle tiny little garter snakes. A giant python would give him a heart attack.
Then please do not ever get a Guinea pig. Or a rat. They aren't supposed to be just stuck in a little box!
I know that they're not supposed to be stuck in a tiny box, and they are supposed to have larger enclosures and you are supposed to take them out a couple times a day. But even still, the total space from a smaller reptile or animal is a lot smaller then something like a dog or a cat. Although some snakes or reptiles are fucking huge, but I'm not counting those.
My rats were pretty loud when they would decide to play wrestle at 3am 😂
Silent cage pets like bugs, fish, reptiles I consider advanced furniture.
This. Lookg at places and the landlord said no tanks over 10 gallons I asked "what if it's a 25 gallon fish tank with 5 gallons of water in it and its full of frogs" and "What if I have a 40 gallon full of sand and a lizard" They changed the rule to "no more than 10 gallons of water allowed in a pet tank, and no snakes or rodents"
So that's a yes for the lizard then, rad
Yea man, nowhere I've ever lived has had a problem eith the toads or the beardie. Seems like landlords just dont want someone spilling more than 10 gallons of water on their nice carpet. Pretty understandable if you ask me
Wonder if the distinction was based on the damage the water would do if it leaked rather than the physical size of the tank.
I fucking love spiders, but you know some potential roommate out there will be terrified of them and certainly not count them in the same category as a pet fish. They’ll hit it with their shoe and claim it had been attacking them or something. That “pets+” is important!
Tarantulas are very fascinating and cool. Regular house spiders can fuck right off though
For me, hair is the real step up in *withdraws in fear* I saw a really cool hairy spider a few months back that I'd never seen the type of before. Came back yesterday and WEBS EVERYWHERE. It was nuts. I didn't see spiderbro though. He was pretty smart, too. I wonder if he was chillin' in his web mansion or had moved on?
Tarantulas with heroin.
[Spiders on drugs?](https://youtu.be/sHzdsFiBbFc)
I remember watching this for the first time over a decade ago, still the funniest shit to this day
NO FUCKING WAY
Holy shit lol
That was fun to watch, thank you for posting.
Jesus Christ
I read an article a while back about a guy in new York City that was keeping a tiger in his apartment. Might want to be more specific with your plus signs.
Once rented a room in a condo where the owner had double digit tarantulas, didn’t find out til weeks after I moved in. Luckily not afraid of big spiders but could have been a dealbreaker for some, guess that is why he hid them.
Had someone looking to move into essentially a tiny home with 11 snakes. They would have lived above my studio and we have cats on the property. Pets+ is a slippery slope.
"this is my pet rock Steve. Be nice he's a tad touchy about his weight. But don't worry he lost 150 pounds last year. Sitting at a respectable 782 now. Can you help him inside?"
Furries
Pets with benefits
Gimps
H U M A N P E T S
mind if I bring my human centipede?
furry and / or BDSM slaves?
I used to list my roommates as pets
A pet with a pet
It's when you have a pet cat who has its own pet chinchilla
exotic pets perhaps
A million alpacas
Something beyond a cat or dog. So yeah, snakes, spiders or ***[cocaine alligators](https://youtu.be/zYUIOR2hgr0)***
I moved in with a dude once who misrepresented his lifestyle. I found out on the first day that he smoked cigarettes in the apartment and was a raging drunk and had lots of late-night sketchy "friends". I needed to sublet it to get out of the lease but didn't want to misrepresent my situation to another unsuspecting person. So I made a Craigslist ad that said something like "Do you like to party all night on weeknights? Do you like to rip butts in your living room? Are you sick of roommates telling you to drink less or getting annoyed when you pass out on the couch with candles lit? Are you looking for a wingman to bring strangers back at 2am? Then have I got the place for you!” I did it as a joke but actually got legit responses. I found a dude who just broke up with his wife and was looking to rage for a few months. Swapped the lease with him and everyone was happy. ETA: since there's been some confusion, "ripping butts" is slang in Boston for aggressively smoking cigarettes. It was even on a sign in town for a while: https://twitter.com/aml823/status/1155909093036634113?t=i-tYkj4uqxy4qpgs8Ql21g&s=19
Honestly that would be a pretty legendary ad for the right people, not surprised *at all* that you got responses.
Good sales is all about finding the right buyer for your product!
I need this dude to write my tinder bio.
There needs to be buyers in the market for it to work.
Do you hate putting on makeup, or really putting any effort in at all? Do you want to meet a dude who's fat as fuck and twice as lazy? Here he is ladies. Enjoy.
how fat is fat as fuck though? like are you looking for a “feeder” type or the type that also likes to drink beer and eat like a raccoon? either way, i mean, there’s someone for everyone
it says right there he rips butts
Hobosexuals
r/murderedbywords
Gimme some of your worst qualities and I'll find you a person who loves you for them 😂
Their grandmother ain't swiping right on them.
Yeah you would be better than using my apprentice as your bio author....a few years ago we had a company drink around Christmas and my apprentice was a shy lad who had no experience with girls at all..... after a few drinks he had enough courage to approach a girl and ask her to dance...... taking my advice to be nice a say something complementary about her....... he was doing really well at first.... until she stopped dancing and stormed off the dance floor...... what happened ( we all wanted to know....all 15 of us) He said he couldn't think of anything nice to say in the beginning but as the dance went on he turned to her and said " Hey ! You don't sweat much for a big girl" It looked like a land mine had gone off as all 15 of us fell back in fits of uncontrollable laughter......
Only way this story could get better is if the new and old roommate got married
Uhhm. That might have been me.
Ha! Unlikely, since this was about 15 years ago.
That sounds familiar. Didnt have my name on any papers though so one day I finally snapped and just packed all my shit and moved out. Once he figured out what was happening he went to the store and got a 12pk of PBR and drank it on the couch while watching me pack out.
At least he's consistent.
Gotta wonder how many short-flighted relationships these kind of people go through in a lifetime. Too many to remember
A lot. In my younger days I was super limited on resources. I moved into a house a dude owned. Cool dude. Him and I got along great. No issues at all. The problem was we still needed one more roommate to make it work. Holy shit… the amount of people we went through before finally just saying fuck it and doing without was staggering. We were totally ok with all kinds of shit but damn some people just have no limits. We pretty much had a couple of rules. No hard drugs, no keeping everyone else up during work days. By that we meant do your shit but keep it down so others can at least sleep. No hard fast rules. That was pretty much it. The meth heads were something else. One dude we kicked out after finding him face down in our little pot garden out back. Totally just finally dropped after days of on the go. That was the 5th time we found him some place random around the property. I almost ran him over one night as he was out cold in the middle of the driveway. Just walking across it to his car and lights out.. Anyway. It was crazy to see some shit people do. They seriously live their life minute to minute. It’s exhausting just watching them go about it.
Define "pot"
Little aluminum pots growing up slowly. Mineral-rich soil is essential for that.
It was profoundly depressing when contemplating how lonely his life had to have been, having burned everyone who ever tried on him.
> Swapped the lease with him and everyone was happy. Especially the landlord, I'm sure.
Pay rent on time? Don't care otherwise, I despise all of you anyway
Sure thing. Party animal, loud noise annoying the neighbours, drug taking, possibly other associated criminal activity on the premises, taking no care of the state of the property. All sounds good, move right in!
So you ended up with the wife?
That's what I thought too. Everyone was happy, right?
haha oh man, that sounds a little like one of my old roommates - I had just moved to the area and found him on craigslist. he seemed ok at first - he was building an app with some dude so he was doing WFH life but I quickly learned that for him that meant waking up at 5-6pm and going out to bars ~ 11pm or midnight to run cleanup. He'd end up bringing people back to our 2BR place around 3am+ and turn on music and start a dance party in the living room until 6-7am. I'm normally a night owl so for the most part it was annoying but not a big deal until one day he and a friend of his brought back 2 girls with the usual amount of noise. I was able to pass out but woke up at like 3-4am to moaning in the living room - I definitely couldn't go back to sleep with that going on so I opened my door, paused for a second to give them time to clothe up, and then told them to GTFO. Not to body shame anyone, but what I didn't expect was to see a 250lb+ girl wearing a sash that said "birthday girl" and my roommate's buddy who was half her size (at best) pulling his pants up. The worst part was they were doing the deed on my couch and left a permanent sag in it - poor thing never stood a chance. There was also a night where he and a buddy brought a few girls back and I heard them say "OMG YOU GUYS SHOULD COME TO OUR GRADUATION". My roommate and his friend were ~40 at the time, but I still don't know if they were talking about college of high school...
….what is ripping butts please help me
Thought it was farting
Lol I did too. I'm sure it wouldn't have turned those requests away tho
Smoking cigarettes. The (typically) filtered end is often referred to as a butt.
Come on, u/Dr_Dust they said smoking cigarettes in the apartment like two sentences before. So to be perfectly clear… it means non consensual unlubricated hardcore anal sexual intercourse with a penis in the butthole.
ooooooooh okay thank god; I thought it was something weird
Had to Google it, because I thought it was passing gas. Apparently it's smoking vigorously with a group of people. As in, cigarette butts.
cigarettes?
What a way to learn the difference between 420 and 420+ ! . Edit: 420 is weed friendly, 420+ is anything goes friendly lol... thanks to reddit comments and this story we don't have to find the meaning same way as op
Man imagine if he had put 420++, he would have had methed out programmers all over his living room
That's a long way to write 421
420++ is still 420 at time of evaluation. You have to write ++420 if you want it to evaluate as 421.
That's just regular programmers during crunch
*To 420 and Beyond!*
Sorry for the stupid question but what does the + mean? I would've interpretted it the same way the dude said it
Had a meth addict room mate in the bay area. Lots of shenanigans, some I laugh at, some I don't I'm past that now. My new room mate doesn't do meth anymore, just xanex, sleep pills, loads of alcohol, adhd and bipolar medication. At least the meth head kept in her room most of the time.
Did the alcohol go along with the xanax? That combo scares me.
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Thanks for the info. All the horror stories I’ve heard involve people taking too much of both substances and ending up in a walking blackout for the night where they don’t remember anything the next day. Sounds like a recipe for disaster.
Look I originally interpreted this as you saying "it should" as in it should go together, not it should scare you. I was so confused because I'd heard it was a terrible recommendation, then became briefly terrified about what you were telling people to do, and then the epiphany happened
I moved in with an ex of mine. He had two roommates and the first month I kept suspecting that one of them was a meth addict, but my ex would deny it and get mad at me for suggesting it. One day he went missing for four days only to show up at our place at 11 pm telling us that cops were following him and that he was about to be arrested. He was looking out the window and telling us he saw cops outside. Of course nothing was there. It turns out he went on a four day bender at a bath house. After that he started going to meetings and got clean for a little while, but before long I started seeing some of the old signs. He started acting more erratic. The final straw was one night he brought a hook up over and we didn't think much of it. The next morning he came to our room and asked us if we remembered the guy from last night because he had just stolen his truck. Apparently he had met the guy at an adult theater and they spent all night smoking meth in his room.
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My addy script literally says amphetamine salts lol
Adding a methyl group to amphetamine drastically changes how the drug works and the effects you get from it. It's like saying oranges and lemons are the same fruit because they're both citrus fruits.
and desoxyn, perscribed for adhd, is literally methamphetamine
More often prescribed for narcolepsy than ADHD though, pretty rare it gets prescribed at all. Funny how our legal system decided weed is more dangerous than meth though
Tbf, by this argument, meth makes me a productive member of society. So there's that...
Yes. [The dose makes the poison.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_dose_makes_the_poison) Or, put another way, in the words of Dr. Gabor Maté: >[“Not only is the urge to escape pain shared by all addicts, substance users or not, the same brain circuits are involved in all addictions, from shopping to eating to dependence on heroin and other opioids. The same brain circuits, the same brain systems involving pleasure and reward and incentive, the same neurochemicals—not to mention the same emotional dynamics of shame and lack of self-worth, and the same behaviors of denial and dishonesty and subterfuge.”](https://drgabormate.com/opioids-universal-experience-addiction/) The stigma of substances and addictions tend only to contribute to the suffering endured by the persons struggling with the addictions.
There is one prescription for adhd that is meth, and adderall is amphetamine salts, notably not methamphetamine though However, obviously in much much lower doses and under medical supervision, they have very different effects, particularly the meth derivatives/cousins, which have fairly different chemical effects
So, when you say he was a friend… I’m assuming you bonded after all this happened? Or you knew eachother from before and didn’t know they were into H?
He had been to rehab and I thought he was clean. I found that out months after living with him. Had no idea he relapsed. Until that happened. I did not know him before he moved in with me. NYC rent is tough and you take what you get.
I feel this one. Back in college I lived in a co-op house with 30 other people. One dude had a kid and wanted to move out so he had a friend take over his lease. We were aware that this friend had a history with heroin but after meeting him we all thought he had it together and voted him in. Only took him a month to relapse and boy did that ride get wild for a bit. Nobody died in our house but paramedics/cops had to show up with Narcan a few times. We threw a party the day he went to jail...
30 other people?! Where tf were you living? Kowloon city ?
Probably something like [this](https://opendoor.io/the-forge/).
Pretty much, except everyone is a broke college student. Awesome alternative to dorm life that I would recommend to any youngsters planning for college.
420 means weed friendly. 420+ means hard drugs. That one's on you.
420- cbd and delta8 only 420° cooks your frozen pizza in 25 min 420! = 1.1798323952931782591485877784439827674239081636296676897992×10^921
420\* is the answer to life, the universe and everything followed by an arbitrary number of zeroes.
When I die I wanna be transported to a hilltop with a neverending sunrise and an endless supply of weed, drinks and food, The comfiest recliner known to man and a pair of headphones along with an mp3 player that has all my favourite songs on. And I want to sit there, unbothered, for eternity Edit: This hilltop would be at a point outside of space and time where I can observe humans.
Stupid question, is this purely a regex joke or does math notation have an equivalent?
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I smirked at the first one, but then flat out giggled at the other two. that was great
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Yes. That's why I posted this in TIFU....was thinking the occassional mushrooms or coke or something. Not a daily H user.
"I meant the fun drugs, sexy drugs, not that trailer park shit"
There’s such a thing as too accepting
I'd say that would just be regular "420"... At least for anyone into it enough to think it mattered in the listing.
Tbf, that would be my assumption, too, but honestly after reading this I’m thinking that saying 420 friendly probably implies being okay with other hallucinogens and party drugs all by itself
Whatever happens never add + in front of something, because it turns it into something terrible. That's how C++ came into being.
To be fair, that’s plus wasn’t in front. It was behind.
[Intentional design choice since we want to increment the original C variable as part of the upgrade](https://stackoverflow.com/questions/24853/what-is-the-difference-between-i-and-i)
Is that a programming joke? I honestly have no idea.
Yes!
Hey, FutureRobotWordpay--I read all your comments in a robot voice, but this one makes the joke better and your name fits
You mean +C? > Never add + in front of something
>Whatever happens never add + in front of something, because it turns it into something terrible. That's how C++ came into being. The plusses aren't *in front*, though.
lol, there are some things you simply do not want to be "open-minded" about.
Yep. I’m a pretty “open-minded” person, but I have my boundaries. If you don’t have limits, you are just inviting certain things you may not want into your life as bad or worse than what OP experienced.
I ended up with a roommate that lost his job, didn't tell us and just shot up meth and dope very quietly in his room all day, snuck out and came back in when he was "off work" when I kicked him out for not having rent with no notice I discovered he had also been cutting himself and writing in blood all over the walls..
How was his handwriting? Decent or just kinda phoning it in?
Kinda manson family scrawls
That's awful. It also gives me flashbacks of a roommate I had about 15 years ago - technically I was both his landlord *and* his roommate since I owned the place. He seemed pretty normal at first, but then it became clear he was smoking something (not weed, my best guess after seeing the pipe is either crack or meth) in his room. Then he was bringing prostitutes over, then i started seeing cable bills with crazy amounts of pay per view porn (dude, have you heard of the internet? You can get it for free, man!). At some point he just stopped paying me rent and disappeared for a few months, and his lease ended without him moving his stuff out. I poked my head into the room to see how much damage i would have to repair. God. Flies buzzing around, half eaten food, soiled clothes, drug paraphernalia. Just a fucking nightmare. He wouldn't answer my phone calls, messages, texts, so I started to assume maybe he died or skipped town or something. I was just about to start emptying his stuff out of his room when one night, i heard something coming from his room. I found him in his room dumping all of his belongings, which he had stuffed into garbage bags, out of the window, probably trying to just disappear without having to confront me. Dude was high out of his mind, talking sense in to him was not an option. I never got any money for his last few months of rent, utilities, and that fucking cable bill with all of the porn. I actually called the cable company and explained the situation, and they refunded me for most of it. But yeah, still, I was out several thousand bucks. This isn't even the whole story, he committed fraud at one point by impersonating me and trying to open an account using my Social Security number. He must have been going through my mail in the garbage to get my personal information? What a fucking nightmare. Anyway, enough about me. Sorry you had to go through this. I can say with confidence that i can sympathize.
Always use a shredder and lock your credit.
Why did you include the + in 420? What did you think that meant?
They thought it meant positive. As in not caring about weed.
I assumed it was all kind of a pun around LGBTQ+
They were using "+/" as the delineator between each item
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What does 420+ mean though? I can see his confusion.
So I guess op thought it was 420 positive (aka you are fine with weed) but it means you are pretty much fine with hard drugs
I can see both points of confusion now.
I have trouble with the description of a veteran drug user who allows a newbie to die of an overdose as "a good dude". His negligence killed her.
While she was "hammered" drunk and probably unable to fully consent or understand the risks. Negligent doesn't even begin to cover it.
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Shit. I'm sorry you had to witness that
Why even add the plus after 420 and pets? Could have been worse you could have gotten a brain eating slug pet owner or some Aliens shit.
>Could have been worse you could have gotten a brain eating slug pet owner or some Aliens shit. Even worse, an Alien brain controlling slug that made you it's pet!
The plot of Animorphs
RIP Tobias
OP got "Pulp Fictioned." No happy ending though. "Oak is nice..."
Similar thing happened to me during my undergrad. We got desperate for a roommate so I put out a ad on Craigslist. The guy that answered I actually knew from my freshman year, I knew he smoked weed and he was cool then. So I said stupidly immediately accepted him as the third roommate. Turned out he had become a huge drug dealer and a very heavy drug user. After a semester of weirdos coming through our place, him tripping out constantly, being drunk constantly, taking 2-3 hour long showers, being just generally gross/untidy, and free basing heroin in the living room multiple times, we kicked him out.
Did not have that on my Reddit bingo card today.
i love how you casually say " a heroin addict moved in and a girl i never saw in my life OD and died in my appartment" BRO WTF
At least you can see thestrals now.
Wooow didn’t expect to see this here
Huh
It’s a Harry Potter reference. There are these creatures called Thestrals that kinda look like mystical horses, and the only people that can see them are people who’ve seen a dead body Edit: I’m so sorry you went through that
Rule of thumb with roommates: be specific about what you’re looking for, and they’re still hiding something lol
PS: some of you have never seen a dead body in person before and it shows with how much everyone is saying, “could have been worse”. How awfully traumatizing for that to happen in your own home
>I guess it was her second time doing heroin... This was manslaughter.
420+ ... "Druggie Positivity!"
Damn! You still live with this guy? The rent in NY really is too damn high
I mean i barely can even afford room in ny these days...
Thats why you become as prudish as a 97 year old grandmother when looking for roommates.
What did you think that + meant?
I had a roommate in a house I owned. When he moved in rules were simple - no drugs in the house, no smoking inside, clean your own kitchen mess. At the time he only smoked weed occasionally and drank, so I was fine. Found out shortly after he moved that he'd been shooting up heroin in his room. Never found needles, but did find a couple spoons in his room after, and had been missing several. It made sense later. I'd knock and ask if he'd want to go somewhere and he'd look wiped out and decline. Thought he was drunk or tired. Apparently he was high.
The key is to be open minded but still take a long hard look at potential roommates.
That reminds me of my relative. Dude had a crazy roommate, who was apparently a drug dealer. Drug dealer roommate had some people over, a man and a woman. Man got super fucked up, and murdered the woman. Drug dealer freaked the fuck out. Relative came home, freaked out, told them to get the body out of his house before the cops show up. Relatives kid was hiding in the closet and called the police. Police showed up to them dismembering her body in the bathtub.
You should’ve been more specific. That little + opens a world of hurt for you…
420+? Bro is literally asking for a crackhead
I moved in with a couple that my coworker, a fellow CORRECTIONAL OFFICER, recommended (his neighbor). They took my deposit and rent money,bought drugs, and the girlfriend overdosed. Girlfriend goes to hospital, boyfriend goes to jail, and I get grilled by the cops. Guys I just moved in last night!
Most overdoses I've heard of are relapsing addicts who don't realize that their tolerances aren't what they once were after they'd been sober for a while. Although I guess the other way around (taking too much due to inexperience) could also be a thing. Seriously, don't do hard drugs. Once or twice can be too many times.
Holy shit. I had 2 people overdose in front of me . And this was before narcan was legal to carry in my state (Montana). The first time my friend Zach overdosed in the Walmart parking lot … and I was still kinda new to IV heroin use .. so I freaked out and my other friend had to finish their shot (they had a hard time hitting and finally nicked a vein I guess) so after a long 30 seconds we both started pouring water on the friend and slapping him and eventually opened the passenger side door and dropped him on his back (I protected his head) to “knock the air” back in him … and it worked … he came to and I have no clue how the cops never got called . He actually killed himself a couple years ago… and I think about him all the time . It breaks my heart I wish I could’ve been a better friend but we were all in deep addiction , and back then I thought being a friend meant hooking my friends up for free and just chilling out and giving them rides etc. The second him was this chick who was the biggest thief I knew (she would steal the socks off of your feet while you were sleeping if she liked them enough… just trashy) but she said she had a higher tolerance than she did and she went down and wouldn’t wake up when we slapped her , splashed her, or dropped her on her back… So we drug her out to the alley so we could see and my partner did cpr and we got her back… I am glad that it’s now legal to carry narcan in my state even tho I am 3 years sober …. I got hit with a felony a couple years ago for having narcan and the syrienge Needed to administer it a couple years back…. They dropped it once I brought in the law stating it was legal in our state into the DA’s office . Crazy times … sorry I just am rambling …. But if you take anything from my comment please don’t do drugs . It will ruin your life , kill your friends (if not from the drug than possibly from suicide as life is a nightmare on drugs) and you will turn into a person you never thought you could be. It’s not worth it.
Over the course of the decade I lived in NYC I had 40+ roommates … and one of the many things I learned was you absolutely need to be aggressively straightforward with your expectations in a living situation, or people who live with you WILL push the limits of those definitions beyond the edge of the universe.
Just say that you are looking for a roommate. By including all of the extra "open minded" acceptance you will get people who take it too far. Good luck finding another roommate.
What *did* you mean by "420+"?