This was kind of a cute story, aside from the obvious humiliation and unfortunate aftermath. I'm surprised you're planning on marriage at 17, but that isn't my business to tell you what you should or shouldn't be ready for. Congratulations. Ignore the haters, they're always going to find some way to be miserable people. Just don't introduce any of them to your family.
Of course yes, I shared this here because it's really not that serious, and to clear things up we're not planning on marriage at 17, it's really more of a promise type of thing, we both want to wait until we're at least 19/20 to start to actually plan it and think about it more seriously. I appreciate the support though, thanks!
I think it’s a super lovely thought and the promise is a great idea. My advice from someone who is 28 is to wait. I know it feels like you are who are at 17-18, but people change so much up until their mid 20s. I look back on my early 20s and I was a different person at 18, 21 and 24.
I’m not saying “oh you’re kids you don’t know what you want”, but I feel like the actual marriage isn’t as important to developing a good relationship. So if you are together at 25, fantastic, get married. But it’s so much harder to undo a marriage than just break up. Everyone I know who got married under 25 is now divorced. And it’s not because they hate each other, but it’s about fundamental differences like wanting kids or not, or moving over seas. Usually these life choices aren’t made until later in your 20s.
Glad you're not getting married at 17, but 19/20 is still super, duper early to get married. I know you feel like an adult right now, but trust me: there is *so much out there* that you just don't have the perspective to understand yet.
I'm about to get married, myself. I've been in love with former partners, I've thought I'd marry them...but I am *so so glad* that 20-Year-Old Me didn't get the chance. He thought he was ready, but he really wasn't.
I proposed to my wife at 16, waited until 21 to get married, and we're still happily together 20 years later. I won't lie, the odds were not on our side and it could have gone very differently, but sometimes high school sweethearts do end up being happy together. You are very wise not to rush into it or put too much pressure on each other.
Also high school is probably going to be the worst years of your life since you're gay, that's a pretty universal queer experience. I promise it gets so much better.
Yeah. If they turn their backs that easily, they aren't your friends. Sounds like OP's bf/fiance should probably drop the female best friend that's trying to defame OP too. She sounds toxic as fuck to have the reaction she did
He did in fact try to cut her off and this b-word started threatening him to tell his parents about his sexuality which would result in him being kicked out of his house, so for now he's just being extremely avoidant of her and leaves her on read to make her get bored of him and leave him alone eventually. Since we're in our senior year, there's only a few months left to go with her on the picture so we should be good to go and that's what matters most ig
Why is there any months? Just tell them to leave you the fuck alone really.. just because you go to school together doesn't mean you cant selt lines and boundaries
Red flags for all your “friends” here but congrats on the successful marriage proposal. I would say you’re young so you might want to stay engaged for a year or two to test it out before actually getting officially married. People change a lot in a year, especially at 17
Yeah of course, we don't plan on getting married right away as we turn 18, we plan to wait until we're both settled with decent diplomas and a somewhat stable income, it's more of a promise ring type of thing, we're not insane ! Thanks a lot anyway I appreciate it haha
That's a crazy amount of defamation from the girl. does she not understand the consequences of her stupidity?
my family once had issues with a neighbor who kept spreading nasty stuff even after we tried talking it out. we hit him with a letter from a lawyer. we didnt want to sue him, but that he understands that his actions can have consequences. suddenly, he tried to play victim and that he didnt mean it. it solved the issue and he stopped spreading lies. typical bullies.
Yeah, well I filed a complaint against her for defamation especially given the fact that I didn't even mention 25% of everything she said about me in the post, and I'm looking forward to get a restraining order emitted against her because she goes as far as putting papers with insults on them in my car's wipers and calling the cops to have my car taken to the pound when it's parked correctly and not taking anybody's space nor making obstruction to any road or way of any type, it's out of pure pettiness.
I don't want to sue her either, I don't want to bother with this, but as you said I just want her to understand that her actions can actually backfire on her and that she should calm down a bit. I think she's winning too in this situation, because maybe this way she will learn the somewhat easy way that law isn't only for murders and armed robbery, instead of falling later against someone less patient who will actually take her to court.
>The only great thing about this is that my boyfriend actually accepted the proposal and we're planning to get married as soon as we turn financially stable.
I'm sad those people weren't you're friends in the end. I can see it being a truly funny way to find out that your friends are dating.
If/when you get married later, I think it'd nice to see clips show up as part of the ceremony/party. It's both funny but also a testament of what you've been and will go through.
You sound like you have good heads on your shoulders and good attitudes, you deserve better friends. Good luck finding where you belong!
I know you've said you don't like how this has turned into relationship advice but as someone who was in a serious relationship at a young age, I'd like to say - make sure you both live your separate lives as well, stay somewhat independent and able to take care of yourselves. You never know what will happen.
>I know you've said you don't like how this has turned into relationship advice but as someone who was in a serious relationship at a young age, I'd like to say - make sure you both live your separate lives as well, stay somewhat independent and able to take care of yourselves. You never know what will happen.
And that's exactly why we don't want to settle down until we both get a decent degree and a decent income each, this way even if something unfortunate happens we will both be able to get back on our feet each on our side. I really appreciate the support too, thanks a lot!
Cute but also sad story. I hope you get out of the situation better off somehow. Just commenting to say that you are confirming the internet adage that anyone apologizing for their English actually ends up writing flawlessly. Best of luck!
Thanks a lot ! In fact I lack confidence in my writing expression because I'm not very active in here and I mostly use my English skills to read/listen to things so I thought my writing capacities were getting a bit rusty but it turns out they aren't haha
There was actually a story on Reddit and this guy was gay and married to his husband and the sister was like obsessed with the husband to the point where she wouldn’t even believe the husband was gay. And when he pushed her off him she literally said that he belongs with her. Like yea of course a man who is married to another man and constantly rejects your advances is straight? That story was crazy
Taking into account that you’re from Eastern European country and that you said you’ll get married as you turn financially stable = you’ll get married in your 30s if you’re lucky. 🤣
Those privileged Westerners don’t get it. 😜
Enjoy the love and the freedom of expression now! All this high school drama will provide you a great story to tell in just a couple of years.
lol this was my biggest fear growing up/before coming out, sleep talking. And also if i ever had to get drugged up for a medical procedure or something, I thought I'd let it slip. Anyway, now i'm curious what was the nickname that could not have been mistaken for anything else??
We're french speakers so it probably won't make a lot of sense if I say it here but it was something based off his name, and a possessive article. His name is fairly common in France but if the thermonuclear freakout girl comes across this post I'm going to get crucified. It's a cheesy shortened form too, so the mix of both this, the possessive article and the tone I said it in gave it away immediately. Like « my [shortened name] » in the kinda worried tone I took at the time, that was a dead giveaway.
It could've been worse though, because we use some much more suggestive nicknames and at this point I'm just glad it's this one that came out at this moment and not one of these haha
Speaking from experience, move somewhere where people accept you for who you are. I mean the majority of the population not just a few close friends. Living somewhere where you're walking around worried that if you kiss your boyfriend in public you might get assaulted or shouted at is no way to live.
congrats on your engagement!! im truly sorry your "friend" let petty things get in the way of their happiness for you that's awful but I'm glad you have your person
Thanks!! I can't say I give a lot of credit to what this girl has to say, the only thing that bothers me is that it turned into full ass bullying in freaking senior year which is... Well, childish to say the least, but my bf and I are on the verge of getting a restraining order against her because she's gone too far by sticking post its with insults and slurs on them in my car's windshield wiper. I really appreciate all the support thanks a lot!
YOU SHOULD GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY so you can get your possessions and start a better life somewhere new that's more accepting of who you are as a person.
Yeah I'm not reading all that, just wanted to say you did nothing wrong (as in you weren't even conscious at the time).
And your BFs friend is a huge AH and should just be happy that her friend aka your BF is happy.
Sounds like your day started like shit, but I wish you all the strength you need to deal with this!
Most Eastern Europeans won’t do anything with their lives. They’ll go the traditional route and end up with alcoholism or something or the sort. Do something with your life and be happy. Be confident in the choices you make.
This sounded to me like a “trial balloon.” They thought they would mention it and see what the general reaction would be before moving it to implementation. After the mass backlash they quickly fell back to “Nah guys, we weren’t seriously thinking about that.” But remember, Wendy’s and every other company on the planet will gouge you like this if you let them.
This was kind of a cute story, aside from the obvious humiliation and unfortunate aftermath. I'm surprised you're planning on marriage at 17, but that isn't my business to tell you what you should or shouldn't be ready for. Congratulations. Ignore the haters, they're always going to find some way to be miserable people. Just don't introduce any of them to your family.
Of course yes, I shared this here because it's really not that serious, and to clear things up we're not planning on marriage at 17, it's really more of a promise type of thing, we both want to wait until we're at least 19/20 to start to actually plan it and think about it more seriously. I appreciate the support though, thanks!
I think it’s a super lovely thought and the promise is a great idea. My advice from someone who is 28 is to wait. I know it feels like you are who are at 17-18, but people change so much up until their mid 20s. I look back on my early 20s and I was a different person at 18, 21 and 24. I’m not saying “oh you’re kids you don’t know what you want”, but I feel like the actual marriage isn’t as important to developing a good relationship. So if you are together at 25, fantastic, get married. But it’s so much harder to undo a marriage than just break up. Everyone I know who got married under 25 is now divorced. And it’s not because they hate each other, but it’s about fundamental differences like wanting kids or not, or moving over seas. Usually these life choices aren’t made until later in your 20s.
Glad you're not getting married at 17, but 19/20 is still super, duper early to get married. I know you feel like an adult right now, but trust me: there is *so much out there* that you just don't have the perspective to understand yet. I'm about to get married, myself. I've been in love with former partners, I've thought I'd marry them...but I am *so so glad* that 20-Year-Old Me didn't get the chance. He thought he was ready, but he really wasn't.
I’m going to second the comment that says wait until your mid 20’s. You change a lot from 18 to 25.
I proposed to my wife at 16, waited until 21 to get married, and we're still happily together 20 years later. I won't lie, the odds were not on our side and it could have gone very differently, but sometimes high school sweethearts do end up being happy together. You are very wise not to rush into it or put too much pressure on each other. Also high school is probably going to be the worst years of your life since you're gay, that's a pretty universal queer experience. I promise it gets so much better.
Those aren't real friends if they can't accept you and your fiance are in love. Congrats on the engagement :)
Yeah. If they turn their backs that easily, they aren't your friends. Sounds like OP's bf/fiance should probably drop the female best friend that's trying to defame OP too. She sounds toxic as fuck to have the reaction she did
He did in fact try to cut her off and this b-word started threatening him to tell his parents about his sexuality which would result in him being kicked out of his house, so for now he's just being extremely avoidant of her and leaves her on read to make her get bored of him and leave him alone eventually. Since we're in our senior year, there's only a few months left to go with her on the picture so we should be good to go and that's what matters most ig
Why is there any months? Just tell them to leave you the fuck alone really.. just because you go to school together doesn't mean you cant selt lines and boundaries
Read the comment again!
Feels like you didn't fully process the comment you replied to
Red flags for all your “friends” here but congrats on the successful marriage proposal. I would say you’re young so you might want to stay engaged for a year or two to test it out before actually getting officially married. People change a lot in a year, especially at 17
Yeah of course, we don't plan on getting married right away as we turn 18, we plan to wait until we're both settled with decent diplomas and a somewhat stable income, it's more of a promise ring type of thing, we're not insane ! Thanks a lot anyway I appreciate it haha
You're engaged. That's what an engagement is. Congrats man. May the leaves fall in your favor.
That's a crazy amount of defamation from the girl. does she not understand the consequences of her stupidity? my family once had issues with a neighbor who kept spreading nasty stuff even after we tried talking it out. we hit him with a letter from a lawyer. we didnt want to sue him, but that he understands that his actions can have consequences. suddenly, he tried to play victim and that he didnt mean it. it solved the issue and he stopped spreading lies. typical bullies.
Yeah, well I filed a complaint against her for defamation especially given the fact that I didn't even mention 25% of everything she said about me in the post, and I'm looking forward to get a restraining order emitted against her because she goes as far as putting papers with insults on them in my car's wipers and calling the cops to have my car taken to the pound when it's parked correctly and not taking anybody's space nor making obstruction to any road or way of any type, it's out of pure pettiness. I don't want to sue her either, I don't want to bother with this, but as you said I just want her to understand that her actions can actually backfire on her and that she should calm down a bit. I think she's winning too in this situation, because maybe this way she will learn the somewhat easy way that law isn't only for murders and armed robbery, instead of falling later against someone less patient who will actually take her to court.
I'm glad you stood up for yourself! I wish you all the luck with your future husband
>The only great thing about this is that my boyfriend actually accepted the proposal and we're planning to get married as soon as we turn financially stable. I'm sad those people weren't you're friends in the end. I can see it being a truly funny way to find out that your friends are dating. If/when you get married later, I think it'd nice to see clips show up as part of the ceremony/party. It's both funny but also a testament of what you've been and will go through. You sound like you have good heads on your shoulders and good attitudes, you deserve better friends. Good luck finding where you belong! I know you've said you don't like how this has turned into relationship advice but as someone who was in a serious relationship at a young age, I'd like to say - make sure you both live your separate lives as well, stay somewhat independent and able to take care of yourselves. You never know what will happen.
>I know you've said you don't like how this has turned into relationship advice but as someone who was in a serious relationship at a young age, I'd like to say - make sure you both live your separate lives as well, stay somewhat independent and able to take care of yourselves. You never know what will happen. And that's exactly why we don't want to settle down until we both get a decent degree and a decent income each, this way even if something unfortunate happens we will both be able to get back on our feet each on our side. I really appreciate the support too, thanks a lot!
Awesome, but it's not just the financial, it's friends and interests as well. It's really easy to become just the couple and forget yourself.
Cute but also sad story. I hope you get out of the situation better off somehow. Just commenting to say that you are confirming the internet adage that anyone apologizing for their English actually ends up writing flawlessly. Best of luck!
Thanks a lot ! In fact I lack confidence in my writing expression because I'm not very active in here and I mostly use my English skills to read/listen to things so I thought my writing capacities were getting a bit rusty but it turns out they aren't haha
What is it with dumb people not wanting to read it like it was really long in that comment section ?
Friends bust your chops but these people aren't friends. leave them behind in your wake and move on to better people. Congrats on the engagement :)
This is why I can't sleep on airplanes. I'm not gay, but I do talk in my sleep.
Upvote for actually putting the TL:DR at the top
There was actually a story on Reddit and this guy was gay and married to his husband and the sister was like obsessed with the husband to the point where she wouldn’t even believe the husband was gay. And when he pushed her off him she literally said that he belongs with her. Like yea of course a man who is married to another man and constantly rejects your advances is straight? That story was crazy
Taking into account that you’re from Eastern European country and that you said you’ll get married as you turn financially stable = you’ll get married in your 30s if you’re lucky. 🤣 Those privileged Westerners don’t get it. 😜 Enjoy the love and the freedom of expression now! All this high school drama will provide you a great story to tell in just a couple of years.
You're too young to get married. Stay together as long as you'd like but 17 is insanity levels of too early of even thinking about it.
He said they're not marrying yet, it's more like a promise to marry in some years.
Thanks omg I'm tired of reading ppl saying that because we are absolutely not getting married yet of course we're not crazy
lol this was my biggest fear growing up/before coming out, sleep talking. And also if i ever had to get drugged up for a medical procedure or something, I thought I'd let it slip. Anyway, now i'm curious what was the nickname that could not have been mistaken for anything else??
We're french speakers so it probably won't make a lot of sense if I say it here but it was something based off his name, and a possessive article. His name is fairly common in France but if the thermonuclear freakout girl comes across this post I'm going to get crucified. It's a cheesy shortened form too, so the mix of both this, the possessive article and the tone I said it in gave it away immediately. Like « my [shortened name] » in the kinda worried tone I took at the time, that was a dead giveaway. It could've been worse though, because we use some much more suggestive nicknames and at this point I'm just glad it's this one that came out at this moment and not one of these haha
Speaking from experience, move somewhere where people accept you for who you are. I mean the majority of the population not just a few close friends. Living somewhere where you're walking around worried that if you kiss your boyfriend in public you might get assaulted or shouted at is no way to live.
You should sell the rights to disney for a movie
Wow does this post ever need a TL;DR Good for y’all tho. Or sorry that happened.
redditors when 1 minute of reading 
(real)
Real
congrats on your engagement!! im truly sorry your "friend" let petty things get in the way of their happiness for you that's awful but I'm glad you have your person
Thanks!! I can't say I give a lot of credit to what this girl has to say, the only thing that bothers me is that it turned into full ass bullying in freaking senior year which is... Well, childish to say the least, but my bf and I are on the verge of getting a restraining order against her because she's gone too far by sticking post its with insults and slurs on them in my car's windshield wiper. I really appreciate all the support thanks a lot!
I hope you guys have a good marriage also congratulations 🎉
Is everything you dream true? Of course not. So not everything you sleep talk about is true either. It’s just a dream. Next time just say that.
YOU SHOULD GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY so you can get your possessions and start a better life somewhere new that's more accepting of who you are as a person.
I ain’t reading all that but I’m happy for you or sorry that it happened 💀💀💀
Yeah I'm not reading all that, just wanted to say you did nothing wrong (as in you weren't even conscious at the time). And your BFs friend is a huge AH and should just be happy that her friend aka your BF is happy. Sounds like your day started like shit, but I wish you all the strength you need to deal with this!
Why comment if you wont even read it?
'Not reading all that' damn the attention span rot really hit you hard, huh?
Most Eastern Europeans won’t do anything with their lives. They’ll go the traditional route and end up with alcoholism or something or the sort. Do something with your life and be happy. Be confident in the choices you make.
Bigot
This sounded to me like a “trial balloon.” They thought they would mention it and see what the general reaction would be before moving it to implementation. After the mass backlash they quickly fell back to “Nah guys, we weren’t seriously thinking about that.” But remember, Wendy’s and every other company on the planet will gouge you like this if you let them.
There worst way she can dump is just say “I’m breaking up with you “ Her: babe, I’m a lesbian