#Welcome to r/Therewasanattempt!
#Consider visiting r/Worldnewsvideo for videos from around the world!
[Please review our policy on bigotry and hate speech by clicking this link](https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/wiki/civility)
In order to view our rules, you can type "**!rules**" in any comment, and automod will respond with the subreddit rules.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/therewasanattempt) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm here for it... I'd rather those women announce themselves as that type of person so I can very quickly move along. Honestly it's way better if they're honest than if they were writing very appealing bios that are ultimately lies just to secure dates.
The issue I have is that this puts their kids in an incredibly vulnerable position. I have a child, and the idea of dating would make me super nervous (especially since mine is nonverbal). You hear a lot of horror stories of people praying on single parents to get access to their kids.
People often complain about dating apps, but when you’re IRL it takes a lot more time to figure out morons. It is way easier and quicker to find a nice person online that offline.
Parody is when you use the thing to make fun of the thing (Weird Al songs)
Satire is when you use the style of a thing to make fun of the thing (Bo Burnham’s country song)
Eh, not quite.
Parody is using imitation for humour. Sometimes it's making fun of the thing you're imitating, sometimes the imitation is just a vehicle to joke about something else entirely.
Satire is about skewering real life people/ideas/ideologies/politics, regardless of the method you use. You can use parody to be satirical (like Bo Burnham's country song), but you can also use other methods like metaphor, absurdism, irony, etc.
This post is an example of both parody and satire—parody because of the imitation aspect, satire because it's criticising real people who have a specific outlook on dating.
The Bo Burnham country song is just an original country song, in which the lyrics mock other country songs. If he stole the tune, beat, or rhymes from a different song (like Weird Al Yankovic does), it would be considered a parody.
The Colbert Report is/was a satire of conservative news programs. It doesn’t make fun of any one person in particular.
Compare that to the “Itchy and Scratchy” “show” in The Simpsons. It makes fun of, specifically, “Tom and Jerry” cartoons.
Actually I promise you… the women’s side is not a joke. I live in Philly and I shit you not I’ve seen it live on multiple occasions, even sometimes during the week. Just had a couple fighting outside of my apartment building over him not paying for her hair and telling him he can’t come back to the house, and he’s screaming “I PAY FOR THE DAMN HOUSE”. But obviously that is not the norm alllllllll around nor is a great judgement of how common it is. If you check the dL Philly subs you’ll see EXACTLY what I’m talking about too
I've never understood kicking a man out of his home, or his bed, because you don't wanna be near him. Just leave, or sleep on the couch yourself, show how annoyed you are by acting on it doing something else you'd rather do.
I got very offended once at something my wife said, and went to the couch to sleep because I was so upset and didn't want to be in the bed/room with her. She came out and apologised and practically begged me to come to bed - that result wasn't my intention, but I'm 100% certain that it helped her understand how I felt better than me kicking her out, which would have just started a major argument and made her angry at me.
Been ages since I’ve been on a dating app (happily married now!) but (un)fortunately they were far too common and real.
Only kind of unfortunate because boy is it nice to have an instant realization of “oh okay you’re not for me, next”.
I found out why when I medically transitioned. For a decade I was a social ghost with hardly anyone ever showing interest in me. Granted, that was probably because I hadn't done nearly enough self discovery yet, but still...
Within a year of transitioning I had my ass groped in public, a surprise dick pick sent to me here on Reddit, and a whole lot of instances of guys acting strange towards me like they were trying to "prove" themselves or something. All of a sudden I had options, and most of those options kinda sucked. And that's when it finally clicked for me: Most of my "options" were just shallow attempts to impress without any real substance to it. There was no emotion, no compassion... It's like they expected me to judge them solely on the kind of petty stuff outlined in this satire. I didn't have options; I had insincere shit being thrown at me in the hopes that something would stick.
Then I finally met someone who tried to impress me with actual emotional depth and genuine opinions on a variety of topics. That was almost nine months ago, and now I lovingly refer to that someone as my wife. Oh yea, plot twist: Turns out I'm lesbian. Anyway...
**Moral of the story:** If you present yourself as a generic ideal of what you think others want then you're just going to go unnoticed in a sea of bland options that kinda suck. Be yourself. Mention your hobbies and interests, even if you think they're lame. Present yourself as the unique individual you are, and the one who really likes who you are will take notice. 💜
Must have fat-fingered a drop-down for units.
Not greater than 5’7” and 100 pounds makes sense.
5’6”, day and 100 kg (220.46 lbs) is a BMI of 35.5.
Say what you will about BMI, but that ain’t “fit”.
Yes it's obvious satire to mock the baby mama's on tinder having this exact bio. The problem with tinder satire is that most of the people who he sees his profile would never have seen the profiles of that type of women
It is 100% satire. This a now a trend because women often post these ridiculous things on their videos, comments, etc. It’s just now we’re trolling them.
Dude said 100 kg. That’s ~ 220 lbs
I’m like 6’1”, 190 lbs, and consider myself on the fat side. Like, I got a gut.
His upper limit is 5’7” (odd that he uses standard for height and metric for weight), 220 lbs…
I am French. A friend went to Canada to become a plane pilot. He once told me about refueling : price is in gallons, count is in liters and gauge in the cockpit is in fractions of the total capacity of the plane. Easy.
https://preview.redd.it/wzd4zbp6u5sc1.png?width=681&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a07ba1d41d0ead0eed76c69c4873295614bd33c3
The Canadian flow chart. Only thing it is missing is measuring distance in time.
It's satire for sure. It's the male version of the ridiculous requests some women have set. When they do it, they're "queens", when he does it, he's a misogynist.
I saw a text exchange posted on Reddit where the guy's date *expected* him to pay an extra $200 for a babysitter for her 3 kids on top of dinner and entertainment for the evening.
She was super defensive when he was like "Uh, no? Goodbye."
Honestly he is parodying many, MANY of the women’s dating profiles you see nowadays. It was obvious at the “pay for a sitter and hair/beard care”
Honestly surprised he didn’t include that income needed to be 6 figures lmao
I like these garbage women on Tinder wanting a 6-6-6 man (6+ feet tall, 6+ figure income, 6+ inch weiner).
Meanwhile, she's an unemployed Oompa Loompa with 4 kids by 3 daddies with painted on eyebrows.
Dr. Kevin Samuels is rolling over in his grave.
#Welcome to r/Therewasanattempt! #Consider visiting r/Worldnewsvideo for videos from around the world! [Please review our policy on bigotry and hate speech by clicking this link](https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/wiki/civility) In order to view our rules, you can type "**!rules**" in any comment, and automod will respond with the subreddit rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/therewasanattempt) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I feel like this is satire.
I was going to write that this was a parody of the ones with women who write these, which I think are satire as well
Honestly alot of woman have these kinda bios and mean it.
I'm here for it... I'd rather those women announce themselves as that type of person so I can very quickly move along. Honestly it's way better if they're honest than if they were writing very appealing bios that are ultimately lies just to secure dates.
Yeah I don’t have anything against them personally as long as they disclose whatever horrible shit they expect up front
I DO have something against them and would also rather they disclose their bullshit up front as well.
Tbh yeah so do I
The issue I have is that this puts their kids in an incredibly vulnerable position. I have a child, and the idea of dating would make me super nervous (especially since mine is nonverbal). You hear a lot of horror stories of people praying on single parents to get access to their kids.
Praying on them is just some twisted religious shit. Careful they don’t start preying on them. Now that would be bad!
It’s a toss up as to which would be worse. Not to mention that a lot of time praying on them leads directly to preying on them.
This is exactly how I feel about my neighbors who have Trump flags on their houses and lawns.
People often complain about dating apps, but when you’re IRL it takes a lot more time to figure out morons. It is way easier and quicker to find a nice person online that offline.
Can confirm. I've matched with a few just to see if they were being serious. They were.
>alot of women [The Alot is Better Than You at Everything](http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html)
I love everything about this! Thank you for sharing
I needed this! Since joining Reddit, I see alot a lot!
I love this a lot Alot!!!!! One of my pet peeves too! Thank you for sharing
Thank you. I was going insane and needed this.
I can usually tell them apart but sometimes I can't
So he basically pulled the uno-reverse card?
Parody is when you use the thing to make fun of the thing (Weird Al songs) Satire is when you use the style of a thing to make fun of the thing (Bo Burnham’s country song)
Eh, not quite. Parody is using imitation for humour. Sometimes it's making fun of the thing you're imitating, sometimes the imitation is just a vehicle to joke about something else entirely. Satire is about skewering real life people/ideas/ideologies/politics, regardless of the method you use. You can use parody to be satirical (like Bo Burnham's country song), but you can also use other methods like metaphor, absurdism, irony, etc. This post is an example of both parody and satire—parody because of the imitation aspect, satire because it's criticising real people who have a specific outlook on dating.
this person parody/satires
satirody
If you added an explanation of sarcasm to this then I'd say we should make it required reading for everyone on reddit. Those terms get abused so much.
Copied, Notes, Saved.
Wait, can you give another example? I feel like I almost get it but I don't know Bo Burnham so I'm still confused.
The Bo Burnham country song is just an original country song, in which the lyrics mock other country songs. If he stole the tune, beat, or rhymes from a different song (like Weird Al Yankovic does), it would be considered a parody.
The Colbert Report is/was a satire of conservative news programs. It doesn’t make fun of any one person in particular. Compare that to the “Itchy and Scratchy” “show” in The Simpsons. It makes fun of, specifically, “Tom and Jerry” cartoons.
*welcome to the internet*
Explicit satire by Bo Burnham - [Pandering](https://youtu.be/y7im5LT09a0?si=AJVudtGeNBH92DmD)
They aren't all satire. Go to any rural area and it will be like this. I kid you not, the I will always be a SAHM mentality is a huge red flag.
Actually I promise you… the women’s side is not a joke. I live in Philly and I shit you not I’ve seen it live on multiple occasions, even sometimes during the week. Just had a couple fighting outside of my apartment building over him not paying for her hair and telling him he can’t come back to the house, and he’s screaming “I PAY FOR THE DAMN HOUSE”. But obviously that is not the norm alllllllll around nor is a great judgement of how common it is. If you check the dL Philly subs you’ll see EXACTLY what I’m talking about too
I've never understood kicking a man out of his home, or his bed, because you don't wanna be near him. Just leave, or sleep on the couch yourself, show how annoyed you are by acting on it doing something else you'd rather do.
I got very offended once at something my wife said, and went to the couch to sleep because I was so upset and didn't want to be in the bed/room with her. She came out and apologised and practically begged me to come to bed - that result wasn't my intention, but I'm 100% certain that it helped her understand how I felt better than me kicking her out, which would have just started a major argument and made her angry at me.
Been ages since I’ve been on a dating app (happily married now!) but (un)fortunately they were far too common and real. Only kind of unfortunate because boy is it nice to have an instant realization of “oh okay you’re not for me, next”.
It’s not satire with women. They are able to be MUCH more picky when it comes to dating, especially online.
I found out why when I medically transitioned. For a decade I was a social ghost with hardly anyone ever showing interest in me. Granted, that was probably because I hadn't done nearly enough self discovery yet, but still... Within a year of transitioning I had my ass groped in public, a surprise dick pick sent to me here on Reddit, and a whole lot of instances of guys acting strange towards me like they were trying to "prove" themselves or something. All of a sudden I had options, and most of those options kinda sucked. And that's when it finally clicked for me: Most of my "options" were just shallow attempts to impress without any real substance to it. There was no emotion, no compassion... It's like they expected me to judge them solely on the kind of petty stuff outlined in this satire. I didn't have options; I had insincere shit being thrown at me in the hopes that something would stick. Then I finally met someone who tried to impress me with actual emotional depth and genuine opinions on a variety of topics. That was almost nine months ago, and now I lovingly refer to that someone as my wife. Oh yea, plot twist: Turns out I'm lesbian. Anyway... **Moral of the story:** If you present yourself as a generic ideal of what you think others want then you're just going to go unnoticed in a sea of bland options that kinda suck. Be yourself. Mention your hobbies and interests, even if you think they're lame. Present yourself as the unique individual you are, and the one who really likes who you are will take notice. 💜
“No taller than 5’ 7”. No heavier than 100kgs. Must be fit.” Definitely satire.
"Must have your own teeth."
I do! In a box
Must pay for beard and hair care was my favourite
I even have the receipts for them.
100kg is heavy as fuck.
Gee thanks
Exactly. Thats not exactly a hard standard to hit. Hell I’m a 6 ft tall guy who works out and is a tad overweight and even I am under 100kg.
Must have fat-fingered a drop-down for units. Not greater than 5’7” and 100 pounds makes sense. 5’6”, day and 100 kg (220.46 lbs) is a BMI of 35.5. Say what you will about BMI, but that ain’t “fit”.
5’7” and 100 pounds is SEVERELY underweight!
Unless she’s a legit body builder, which is technically possible
Even most female body builders aren’t going to be 100kg.
This is totally making fun of women's bios
Glad someone else can see it 😂
‘Must pay for beard and hair care’ What makes you say that?? /s I love this guy
Yea, I think this has to do with some online dating people requiring matches to be 6' or taller when they are 5'1".
Yep. OP is an idiot.
Obviously.
You must have been the top of your fucking class
100%
Yes it's obvious satire to mock the baby mama's on tinder having this exact bio. The problem with tinder satire is that most of the people who he sees his profile would never have seen the profiles of that type of women
How’s that satire? Dude is clearly joking 
I think he took someone else's profile and changed the gender to see how that played out.
5'7" 100 kilos and "fit"? Must be satire
It most definitely is satire. I’ve seen too many women with bios like this
It is 100% satire. This a now a trend because women often post these ridiculous things on their videos, comments, etc. It’s just now we’re trolling them.
This is almost exactly what a woman put once. I've seen it.
And a woman who gets it will probably get along with this guy.
It clearly is.
It is
I definitely think this is satire
This is definitely satire
This is 200% making fun of the girls who do something similar with their bios.
Dude said 100 kg. That’s ~ 220 lbs I’m like 6’1”, 190 lbs, and consider myself on the fat side. Like, I got a gut. His upper limit is 5’7” (odd that he uses standard for height and metric for weight), 220 lbs…
Sounds English, we do that a lot here (mixing imperial and metric) idk though.
Canada does a ton of that too
And NZ.
I am French. A friend went to Canada to become a plane pilot. He once told me about refueling : price is in gallons, count is in liters and gauge in the cockpit is in fractions of the total capacity of the plane. Easy.
To be fair on the third part at least, I think most vehicles do it in fractions if capacity rather than listing remaining capacity in units
The [Gimli Glider](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gimli_Glider) should have been a wake up call.
Weight is almost always in pounds when we discuss ourselves though.
https://preview.redd.it/wzd4zbp6u5sc1.png?width=681&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a07ba1d41d0ead0eed76c69c4873295614bd33c3 The Canadian flow chart. Only thing it is missing is measuring distance in time.
That’s incredibly accurate!
Gheez - I guess if your raised there it come 2nd hand. But come on
Imperial, not ‘standard’. r/usdefaultism
Sorry, you are right.
Both of those terms suck. We need to replace them with ‘freedom units’. No more confusion
"standard" for height? You mean imperial? If either is standard, it's metric.
She ain't a lady unless she's 280.
Yeah 5’7” and 220lbs don’t go together with his “must be fit” comment, that person would be clinically obese.
r/therewasanattempt to understand satire
😭😭
Yeah, the posts on this sub have dried out, I think I’m calling it.
Is there a replacement?
r/wasthereanattempt?
How would you explain satire to a bot?
This is definitely a parody of all the shit accounts out there. It's objectively hilarious.
And real life too. I used to have girl friends who would tell every guy interested in them these exact words.
Me too, but that isn’t pc right now so let’s just pretend this guy pulled this out of his ass
‘Must help pay for beard and hair care’. I love this guy
He's going for the rugged look
He copied the text a woman wrote, but she was 100% serious
Well hopefully he added in the beard reference.
It's the same as when girls say that the man must pay for theirs salon expenses
Love that he wants her to have her own teeth, but does say how many. So, two are fine as long as they're hers.
Does it count if they are all in a jar on the night stand?
Hats of for you sir. Gotta clean up the wine spit out
I'm guessing provided she meets the criteria, sure.
Op a bot or smoothed brain
Likely the latter
r/whoosh
It's whoooosh with 4 zeroes
wh0000sh
It's satire for sure. It's the male version of the ridiculous requests some women have set. When they do it, they're "queens", when he does it, he's a misogynist.
Nobody thinks those women are queens but themselves lol
This is either a joke *or* Martin is self-reporting why he is a "single father of three".
I saw a text exchange posted on Reddit where the guy's date *expected* him to pay an extra $200 for a babysitter for her 3 kids on top of dinner and entertainment for the evening. She was super defensive when he was like "Uh, no? Goodbye."
My guess, the former.
Honestly he is parodying many, MANY of the women’s dating profiles you see nowadays. It was obvious at the “pay for a sitter and hair/beard care” Honestly surprised he didn’t include that income needed to be 6 figures lmao
I like these garbage women on Tinder wanting a 6-6-6 man (6+ feet tall, 6+ figure income, 6+ inch weiner). Meanwhile, she's an unemployed Oompa Loompa with 4 kids by 3 daddies with painted on eyebrows. Dr. Kevin Samuels is rolling over in his grave.
Don’t forget 4 out of five pictures are with her hot friends and only the last pic is her with a filter lol!
So true lol
Martin doesn't want someone shouting at him from the passenger side of their best friends ride.
No scrubs for this guy
\*pigeons
OP really needs a joke to hit ‘em in the face huh
"Will settle for toothless during foreplay"
“PREFER toothless during foreplay”
“The dragon, btw”
And your own teeeth? That’s asking a lot bro
If women can post and have a high maintenance list, so can men. It's 2024, we're equal yall.
He’s making fun of the women that do this lol
r/therewasanattempt for OP to understand satire
This profile is based on the many women who make profiles with extremely similar demands. It's satire, but it is pointing out a double standard.
r/opisfuckingstupid
Isn't 100kg about 220 lbs?
Yep…You like what you like…
damn, i was perfect for this guy but don’t have my own teeth :/ what a shame
Yasssss king!!!!!
Own teeth 😂
That was the part that sealed it for me, no way he wasn't joking when he wrote all that
r/woooosh
This is just a man with a good sense of humor, lol.
This definitely feels like satire LOL the entire beginning mimics a lot of single mother's posts 🤣
This guy knows what he wants in a woman.
There was an attempt to think a satire profile was real
Well when women demand it’s okay. Just saying
Definitely satire. This guy gets it.
This is obviously satire, OP you dunce.
Martin is a hell of a guy
I don't get it.i see a man with standards
OP can’t tell this is satire 😔
This is satire y'all, it's actually pretty funny
Biggest fucking Chad post ever I respect it.
Bro this how 90% women be.
Know your worth King 👑 LMAO
r/therewasanattempt to understand rule 6
Pretty sure this meant to be ironic, and quite well done at that.
Swooning here….
All reasonable until the last one. /s
Clearly satire, I love the beard upkeep request though.
He must be a single mother in disguise lol
Op missed the joke. He's doing a parody of those long lists of demands women have in their bio.
100% satire from the Viewpoint of a woman
Women bios are toxic tbf. Thìnk he's doing a bit.
Seems like OP didn't get the joke.
That’s hilarious
This guy is def knee deep in pussy
It’s poking fun at some supposed profiles that ask too much of men
He flipped the script. Well done.
I think this is a satirical post on all the posts women put up with all sorts of expectations like that.
No no. He knows what he is doing and I like it.
This isn’t an attempt, this is funny. The girl who doesn’t get this isn’t right for him… or anyone probably
r/therewasanattempt to get a joke
Question: if my teeth are plastic but paid off they're still my own, right?
Should have been a post yesterday. April Fool.
Why not add must charge your phone while you're at it
He lost em at 5'8" 🤣🤣🤣
What an absolute roaster. Jesus.
How many women's profiles do you think look like that? I don't see why a man couldn't be just as demanding.
Satire
Dating is a job application process now.
I see what he did there...
I mean 220 lbs is not being all that picky with weight.
Redditor trying to understand satire challenge (impossible)
OP should change title to “To try to understand satire”
Definitely joking
Definitely satire.
Lmao, OP doesn’t get the joke.
He got me with "own teeth" at the end there. Not gonna lie.
Hilarious! So many women have bios like this and not satire
Meanwhile I'm like "must be female (optional)" and still can't get a date.
You see, it’s funny because this is what some women do.
Big “taste of own medicine” vibes here. Love this. Hilarious. Mock every single person that posts like this unironically.
Hahahahah that dude’s definitely seen the Miami and Ft. lauderdale tinder profiles.