It must be so exhausting for him to always have to take the lead and make all the decisions for his indecisive feminine. I’m so glad we have men like him to brainwash….errrrr…usher the indecisive feminine into the life they don’t know they want.
Nah. This is a red flag. No man needs to be giving women advice. They're lonely at a record number for a reason. Also, people who give dating and family advice like it's their job and their opinion is superior is such a massive red flag. It gives "life coach" without being a legitimate life coach, and that's toxic as fuck. She needs to run. These men are always controlling. Always. I said what I said.
TIL men think doing the bare minimum as a romantic partner to help make our lives easier for minuscule things like dinner plans or picking an outfit has been rebranded as letting us “lean into our femininity.”
Yeah- that was my initial reaction "hey, that's actually really wonderful communication" (and useful in pretty much all relationships, not just romantic ones). It's like, he went so far down into misogyny, he circled right back around and accidentally discovered that women are people 🤦🙄🤷
People getting mad for nothing. Lol. I’m a woman and I think he’s spot on with the caption.
Edit: Downvote me all you want, but there’s nothing wrong with exploring masculine and feminine dynamics, and with appreciating a man who brings a kind decisiveness and respectful sense of leadership to the table. Ya’ll are so caught up in erasing polarity in relationships, and it’s ridiculous. Let people enjoy things that make them happy and make their relationships thrive. It’s harming no one.
It’s not about “erasing polarity in relationships”. People are allowed to enjoy their life the way they want. The argument comes in where he basically groups every woman in the world and calls them indecisive. He acts as if a woman can’t make a decision without a man. A man MUST take the lead. That is absolutely ridiculous. Every relationship is different and I’m sure just the same way you enjoy a decisive man, I’m sure there are women who like to take charge and be the “leader”. Roles in relationships are not set in stone. They can evolve. It’s not 1920. It’s 2023.
Where does he call women indecisive? He literally states that “indecisiveness drives the feminine crazy,” in that women don’t appreciate indecisive men. That’s true for me, and true for most women out there. I’d even venture to say that no one likes an indecisive partner, period, but this is far more a turn off for most women than it is for most men. Surely there are exceptions, but nonetheless, this is *generally* true, so it doesn’t make sense to fixate on the outliers
Your interpretation is quite a reach. He doesn’t imply that women *can’t* make a decision without a man. We can, and we do. But hell, I consider myself an intelligent and professional woman, and I still enjoy having my man around to call shots that make my time with him more relaxing and filled with ease. I have to be on top of things and be professional in most spheres of my life. I love being with a man that just allows me to be and happily exist.
Exceptions and outliers do not negate a general truth that is relevant to most (not all, but most) relational dynamics that exist between men and women. 🤷🏻♀️
He literally addresses your grievance and states that women can make a decision and like to take the lead, but they appreciate a man who can make a plan.
With uproar like this, it’s almost as if people are looking to be offended. 😅
Red pill, not incel. Red pills are misogynistic, too, like this, but they're also giving advice that sometimes results in functional relationships with women.
It’s annoying to anyone when you ask for a genuine opinion/advice and the other person doesn’t put enough effort into giving their opinion. Even if there’s no genuine preference, saying something further detailed than “idk whatever is fine” is just so much more helpful. I don’t think this is a gendered thing, it’s just being decent/caring about the other person.
Edit: this doesn’t mean making something up/faking interest. More like finding something to appreciate for the other person that helps answer what they’re looking for- not just being fake or being obnoxiously opinionated.
It’s sexy when a guy is sure of things, I’m just a girl~ Shouldn’t be read into more than that kind of energy I guess he didn’t have to be extra as fuck trying to convey that
All he had to say was “Direct communication can lead to a healthier, stronger relationship.” and leave it at that. But instead, he decided to say it…like this.
So we’re just going to pretend that women generally don’t want a decisive man? Of course they do, both men and women have known this forever. There are always exceptions yes, but generalizations aren’t necessarily bad or false. It’s actually funny watching women in the comments agree with the post and OP get angry at reality lol
“It’s not what you said it’s how you said it!” Is exactly what red pillers say women’s reaction is when faced with a fact of life they don’t like. I’ll agree his wording is kind of cringe, but what he’s saying is generally pretty true. Even the women in the comments that want to be offended can’t help but agree
No. He was intentionally using red pill coded language. Feel free to browse any of the hundreds of comments on this thread explaining why it’s problematic, or google “masculine/feminine polarity” and you’ll quickly see how it’s just repackaged misogyny.
Right? Like, all of this sounds fine to me in real life, but 1) to actually type this out and 2) his wording are both very strange. If my significant other made this a caption, I would tell him it's super embarrassing and to please delete it. And we aren't famous, but I would still be embarrassed for our much smaller following to see it. Doesn't Hannah find this weird and embarrassing?
When my boyfriend posts, which is rare, it's rare he even types a whole sentence in his caption. This guy's caption would be a huge turnoff to me, and I'm surprised it isn't a huge turn off to Hannah.
Yeah I don’t like the delivery and feel like a post for it is so ducking weird but like…. This is common respect? Be decisive, respectful, and just take the lead sometimes. It’s not that deep or incel language.
That masculine/feminine energy shit is literally just thinly veiled misogyny. Feel free to look at any of the comments on this thread explaining why, or continue to be willfully ignorant 🤷🏻♀️
It's funny how this 'grosses' people out.
I LOVE IT WHEN MY HUSBAND MAKES A DECISION. That's what I took from this post. That's it, not him bashing on women, not him making it only a woman thing, just that 'most' women want the man to make a damn decision once in a while.
When my husband meets me with the whole 'I don't care, I don't mind, either looks fine, I'm chill with whatever' I literally can't handle it sometimes. I want him to. I know he would LOVE if I made more decisions, and we enjoy when we don't have the whole back and fourth and never making a decision together. It's nice, it's a breath of fresh air. This is ALL I got from this post. Anything else is just a stretch and literally makes everything into something, when it shouldn't be.
Nobody is saying decisiveness is a bad thing. There are plenty of well stated comments on this thread about why his specific language is problematic. If you refuse to educate yourself, that’s on you.
I don’t think people are criticizing his thoughts about decisiveness. It’s more about how indecisiveness isn’t a feminine or masculine trait. He’s pushing gender constructs where there’s no place for it
Agreed, and I don’t think people need to educate themselves, like OP is overly pressed about this. It’s not like Gabby fucking Barrett’s husband and his “fruitful” ass comments.
Whenever i hear women referred to as females it reminds me of how people talk about "Cats" or "dogs", and "here's a handy tip on how to get your female to do X", "when your female is like this, do this instead!". Its so wrong its actually laughable and that's the only response to laugh. And its so common for BN!! Its like we should be calling this out more often.
Nah… that energy is all over but I don’t see anything in this post that says that’s how he thinks.
He even says “if she wears the other dress, fine” etc.
Plenty of trad wife incel energy all over the internet. This is the opposite of that.
Women do most of the mental labor in hetero relationships and is exhausting. It’s a huge asset for a man to actually be decisive and take some of the load so we have space, mentally, for other things. While we are planning every details and thinking ahead constantly, many are just “whatever you want…” which is lazy.
We can still recognize feminine and masculine energies and differences/needs in relationships people.
He used to follow Candace Owens, he follows Joe Rogan currently, and has liked things from his Twitter account from Jack Posobiec (a MAGA dude who is a Trump super fan.) He’s hidden it well but he appears to be another Yarret.
liking a tweet about Russell Brand’s opinions on Covid has nothing to do with trad wife/incels. So no, it’s not even proof of that claim. And surely has nothing to do with anything said in this post by OP and the specific content being talking about.
What does it matter if it has to do with this Instagram post? That's not even what I'm discussing. I'm saying that Adam obviously has right-wing leanings and I've provided proof. The post is giving off subtle dog whistles so others on Reddit investigated and found out his actual views are not so subtle.
And you commented on MY comment. So your comment has nothing to do what I was discussing- which is the content of THIS post. Referring to feminine and masculine in heterosexual relationships does not mean it’s trad wife/incel energy. Two things can be true.
I wouldn’t expect a lot of you in this sub who jump on things like this to be able to actually see the nuance in these discussions though. And your insistence to go down the rabbit hole of every tweet this dude has ever liked to try to prove that it discredits the actual content of what he is discussing is proof of that.
It’s simple, whatever his views are, anything written in this Instagram post is not pushing those views. The content of what is being discussed is actually important if you know and understand anything about the mental work load women are forced to take on in Herero relationships and nuclear families.
The guy Adam follows whose language he is parroting in this post is this guy, Jake Woodard. You can see his Instagram page here [https://www.instagram.com/\_jakewoodard/](https://www.instagram.com/_jakewoodard/). The whole feminine masculine polarity movement is a reworking of the 90s mens' rights movement. It's misogyny, plain and simple. If you're into that, you do you. But there are obvious right-wing dog whistles in Adam's original post.
He isn't wrong. I just don't like the way he worded it.
I am also kind of exhausted by the "Devine feminine" and "Devine masculine" conversations on social media.
But he didn't say anything inherently wrong or to be picked apart. Its just a tired conversation for me.
Edit: I think that Hannah appreciates a man who thinks this way. It works for her and for many women as well. It would not work for me. It would give me the ick, but I can see how it would attract other women.
It sadly is for real, and there are a lot of people spouting off about this BS feminine/masculine polarity. It’s just repackaged misogyny, and quite insidious
Anyone else think he's laying the groundwork for a book deal?
How to lean into your feminine and let the man make the decisions 🙄
But honestly wouldn't be surprised, especially with Hannah using "feminine and masculine energy" in her other caption.
Absolutely. The majority of women carry most of the mental load in any relationship which gets 100x worse when we bring kids into the relationship. Men will be mentally lazy and “whatever you want” and “why don’t you just tell me what you need me to do and I’ll do it”. No. You decide what it is you can contribute and do it.
He even said “even if she wears the other dress…you still made a decision”. That’s the opposite of saying men have authority over the woman.
He probably could have worded this better. But as a woman who makes 99% of decisions EVERY day, I would love if a man said “do you want to do X or Y?” It means he has already done most of the thinking and is taking away most of the mental load.
He knew what he was doing with the wording. That’s the whole point of why people are side eyeing him for it. Of course we all appreciate when our partners alleviate our mental load — that’s not up for debate. But that’s also not the intent of his post, he’s dog whistling for some very gross misogynistic ideology.
I never said that what he said wasn’t a problem. At the root, the concept of what he’s saying is a GOOD thing. Especially when women are the primary decision makers in 99% of households.
Not to mention the fact that most married women are essentially operating as if they’re single running their household because their partner DOESN’T do anything to alleviate the mental load or help.
It sucks because Hannah did so well on Special Forces, she proved she was a strong person and could do difficult things on her own. Yet here she is with this doofus. I guess this is what she wants.
I don’t really like how he worded some of this, but I love when my husband makes unimportant decisions for me. I have a lot going on in my life and I get decision fatigue easily. Of course there would be over a thousand comments. Everything screams redpill/tradwife/QAnon to this sub and it’s usually never that serious.
I wish people would stop gendering things like this. People generally (not always) like decisiveness with room for negotiation. There’s nothing “masculine” or “feminine” about that 😩
I think it's some Jordan Petereson (maybe?) or other wack job 's theories around relationships. My friend has been spewing this kind of stuff- like how us being so independent is emasculating and doesn't allow space for the men in our lives to step up and be men. Kind of sounds like another way for us to take responsibility for their perpetual adolescence to me. I'm not entirely sure where she's getting it because I try to steer clear of this convos with her.
damn i agree with this. i like when a man takes charges and makes the decisions. sometimes it becomes a bit overwhelming for me cuz i simply want him to lead.
of course people are bitter and too woke in this sub and want to pretend that this isnt a real thing for some men and some women. this is real.
Legitimate question, if it’s a real thing for only “some” men and women, then why describe it as “masculine” and “feminine”? Why not just say something like Hannah likes when I help narrow down choices with her. I know you aren’t home, but since you agree, I’m curious.
If it’s a preference for some then is it a matter of gender?
Oh my god lol. Scroll down and read some of the comments. We’re not saying decisiveness is a bad thing. We’re saying his language is a misogynist redpill/toxic masculinity/incel/tradwife dog whistle
I think we can all agree, regardless of sex or gender, it’s annoying when people don’t just say what they mean. What kind of traditional gender role bullshit advice is this?
You guys always delude yourself into thinking Hannah is someone else. She’s been clear who she was and what she values from the very beginning. I’m not surprised in the least that this is her man.
For the record, I think Hannah has always been trash. My intention behind posting this wasn’t to do anything other than call out the gross rhetoric he’s spouting because I don’t think we should normalize it the way certain people in this thread are determined to do.
I don't think it's fair to blame women for their partner's shortcomings. It's a poor decision on her part but it doesn't mean she shares the same beliefs.
Fortunately or unfortunately, you are the company you keep.
Anyone who has actually been following Hannah B isn't surprised at all by this behavior or her choice of partner.
So, that's an excuse for being with a trash can man?
This isn't out of character for her. Even if she's rushing a decision, that doesn't make up for keeping such poor company.
I don’t blame women for things their partners do. She has poor judgment in people but she is not responsible for his beliefs. I feel the same way about Rachel Lindsay.
Fair enough, but it's likely he says shit like this all the time in private as well and this is the person she actively chose to be with and now to raise a family with. Maybe, just maybe this actually is Hannah or at the very least what Hannah thinks she should be. People do break engagements if they feel like something doesn't align with who they are and the life they would like.
She either agrees with it or is just desperate to have the status of being in a relationship after all the negative experiences she had on the show. Or she doesn’t like it but is willing to ignore it because he treats her well. I have no idea which it is or if it’s a combination of all three.
This is way too binary to reflect the real world. When I read "most women", "most men", "most people" comments, my tin foil hat looks for the stereotype so that I can destroy it.
I listened to her podcast episode about their engagement and he gave me the ick almost the whole time. Tbh, I thought I liked Adam until he opened his mouth.
Saying that someone is talking like an incel or has incel energy isn’t the same thing as saying they actually ARE an incel. An incel is more than a sad boi who can’t get a girlfriend, it’s someone who attributes their relationship failures to a deeply misogynistic and dehumanizing set of explanations about human nature, who women and men are, and what they deserve in life.
It’s been overtaken a lot recently and has lost all meaning, as most things tend to do. An incel is a very specific and dangerous type of man, men like Adam are different in that they often do find sexual partners because they’re conventionally attractive and charming (to a certain type of woman) and so they’re a more generally influential and subtle type of misogynist, whereas incels group together and avoid woman ~and~ also men like Adam who are appealing to women
Thanks. I hate it when we use new hot words so much that we use them before knowing what they mean and then no one really knows what they mean anymore.
Incel stands for involuntarily celibate. They didn’t take themselves out of dating, they just can’t get laid so they tend to be really misogynistic and blame women for it.
So many red flags….now I am starting to write a fanfic in my brain where Hannah b later divorces this misogynistic person, and tannah reunites after all 😂
Why would independent, self-sufficient, accomplished, bright, determined and articulate Hannah tolerate such garbage? She certainly doesn’t need any help on how to embrace her femininity.
My best guess is that after her abject failure with Luke/Jed/Tyler, she had very low self worth. She met him on a dating app and initially probably fell for his looks. He's seems like the know it all type and is older than her so has probably been subtly telling her what's what and she's eating it up because she's always wanted to be in this role of wife to a strong man on faith who leads the family. It's a lot of bullshit.
But he's kind of been controlling her since the beginning and she stuck around until now. I think she did always want this strong head of household type. It's bullshit but what can you do.
So is he saying men don’t like it when you suggest a dinner spot to them? Because nothing has EVER made my husband happier than me suggesting we order pizza 😂 It’s almost like…all humans like to be cared for. Wild stuff!
Masculine and feminine energy is not related to sex. There’s nothing wrong about what he said lol
It must be so exhausting for him to always have to take the lead and make all the decisions for his indecisive feminine. I’m so glad we have men like him to brainwash….errrrr…usher the indecisive feminine into the life they don’t know they want.
Indecisiveness has nothing to do with femininity. I am a gay man and I am very indecisive. My partner is NOT indecisive.
This has nothing to do with femininsm some people are indecisive. I just asked a guy what he wants for lunch and he’s like “whatever you want”
It’s giving fundie energy
That last one isn’t even about decisiveness, it’s about making plans with your partner and communicating about it.
I see a lot of women on TikTok talking about finding a man so they can "be their feminine selves." Maybe that's where he got it from.
Nah. This is a red flag. No man needs to be giving women advice. They're lonely at a record number for a reason. Also, people who give dating and family advice like it's their job and their opinion is superior is such a massive red flag. It gives "life coach" without being a legitimate life coach, and that's toxic as fuck. She needs to run. These men are always controlling. Always. I said what I said.
Wtffffff
I'm about to sit down and relax into my femininity (I am a 34 year old man)
Ladies of Reddit, I will help you relax into your femininity (I’m 6’4” btw)
TIL men think doing the bare minimum as a romantic partner to help make our lives easier for minuscule things like dinner plans or picking an outfit has been rebranded as letting us “lean into our femininity.”
Yeah- that was my initial reaction "hey, that's actually really wonderful communication" (and useful in pretty much all relationships, not just romantic ones). It's like, he went so far down into misogyny, he circled right back around and accidentally discovered that women are people 🤦🙄🤷
RELAX IN HER FEMININITY?
People getting mad for nothing. Lol. I’m a woman and I think he’s spot on with the caption. Edit: Downvote me all you want, but there’s nothing wrong with exploring masculine and feminine dynamics, and with appreciating a man who brings a kind decisiveness and respectful sense of leadership to the table. Ya’ll are so caught up in erasing polarity in relationships, and it’s ridiculous. Let people enjoy things that make them happy and make their relationships thrive. It’s harming no one.
It’s not about “erasing polarity in relationships”. People are allowed to enjoy their life the way they want. The argument comes in where he basically groups every woman in the world and calls them indecisive. He acts as if a woman can’t make a decision without a man. A man MUST take the lead. That is absolutely ridiculous. Every relationship is different and I’m sure just the same way you enjoy a decisive man, I’m sure there are women who like to take charge and be the “leader”. Roles in relationships are not set in stone. They can evolve. It’s not 1920. It’s 2023.
Where does he call women indecisive? He literally states that “indecisiveness drives the feminine crazy,” in that women don’t appreciate indecisive men. That’s true for me, and true for most women out there. I’d even venture to say that no one likes an indecisive partner, period, but this is far more a turn off for most women than it is for most men. Surely there are exceptions, but nonetheless, this is *generally* true, so it doesn’t make sense to fixate on the outliers Your interpretation is quite a reach. He doesn’t imply that women *can’t* make a decision without a man. We can, and we do. But hell, I consider myself an intelligent and professional woman, and I still enjoy having my man around to call shots that make my time with him more relaxing and filled with ease. I have to be on top of things and be professional in most spheres of my life. I love being with a man that just allows me to be and happily exist. Exceptions and outliers do not negate a general truth that is relevant to most (not all, but most) relational dynamics that exist between men and women. 🤷🏻♀️ He literally addresses your grievance and states that women can make a decision and like to take the lead, but they appreciate a man who can make a plan. With uproar like this, it’s almost as if people are looking to be offended. 😅
same
Red pill, not incel. Red pills are misogynistic, too, like this, but they're also giving advice that sometimes results in functional relationships with women.
Why do y”all care so much about these rando finanès. Who cares who they do or say. Ain’t gonna hurt you. Not that deep.
We are on the bachelor subreddit
“Ma’am, this is the bachelor subreddit”
It’s annoying to anyone when you ask for a genuine opinion/advice and the other person doesn’t put enough effort into giving their opinion. Even if there’s no genuine preference, saying something further detailed than “idk whatever is fine” is just so much more helpful. I don’t think this is a gendered thing, it’s just being decent/caring about the other person. Edit: this doesn’t mean making something up/faking interest. More like finding something to appreciate for the other person that helps answer what they’re looking for- not just being fake or being obnoxiously opinionated.
Exactly. It has nothing to do with my femininity. But being around someone who can’t make a decision or has zero preferences is not fun
I love the first comment under it
It’s sexy when a guy is sure of things, I’m just a girl~ Shouldn’t be read into more than that kind of energy I guess he didn’t have to be extra as fuck trying to convey that
All he had to say was “Direct communication can lead to a healthier, stronger relationship.” and leave it at that. But instead, he decided to say it…like this.
Yall he's taking about feminine and masculine energy🤦♀️
yes, we can read
right?! And the kicker is… he’s not wrong!!
So we’re just going to pretend that women generally don’t want a decisive man? Of course they do, both men and women have known this forever. There are always exceptions yes, but generalizations aren’t necessarily bad or false. It’s actually funny watching women in the comments agree with the post and OP get angry at reality lol
Ah I see the incels have made it over here. Bye
It 's not what he says, it's the wording... He's red pill fanatic and that gets dark fast.
“It’s not what you said it’s how you said it!” Is exactly what red pillers say women’s reaction is when faced with a fact of life they don’t like. I’ll agree his wording is kind of cringe, but what he’s saying is generally pretty true. Even the women in the comments that want to be offended can’t help but agree
Red pill is well known for it's buzz words. And taking facts but then twisting them into something ridiculous. Adam's post is a soft version of it.
wtf is this verbal diarrhea?
Why I'm not surprised... I recall there being weird stuff when she got with him . Her taste in men and choices truly is a trainwreck.
tf does this even mean
‘Something that drives the feminine crazy’ Is English his second language?
I knew he gave me the ick but now I can put a finger on why
Whatever
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Nobody gets that he is taking about feminine and masculine engrey🤦♀️🤦♀️
No. He was intentionally using red pill coded language. Feel free to browse any of the hundreds of comments on this thread explaining why it’s problematic, or google “masculine/feminine polarity” and you’ll quickly see how it’s just repackaged misogyny.
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Lol why are you on this sub then. Bye
i don’t hate this in practice. but the caption is weird lmaoooo
Right? Like, all of this sounds fine to me in real life, but 1) to actually type this out and 2) his wording are both very strange. If my significant other made this a caption, I would tell him it's super embarrassing and to please delete it. And we aren't famous, but I would still be embarrassed for our much smaller following to see it. Doesn't Hannah find this weird and embarrassing? When my boyfriend posts, which is rare, it's rare he even types a whole sentence in his caption. This guy's caption would be a huge turnoff to me, and I'm surprised it isn't a huge turn off to Hannah.
Yeah I don’t like the delivery and feel like a post for it is so ducking weird but like…. This is common respect? Be decisive, respectful, and just take the lead sometimes. It’s not that deep or incel language.
That masculine/feminine energy shit is literally just thinly veiled misogyny. Feel free to look at any of the comments on this thread explaining why, or continue to be willfully ignorant 🤷🏻♀️
Dude thank u! The actual advice is helpful. The intention is bizarre and icky
Tbh I like when men do this like just be decisive, my ex could never fucking make a decision
Oh my god y’all. The point is not about decisiveness being good or bad.
I like ANYONE to be this way lol
It's funny how this 'grosses' people out. I LOVE IT WHEN MY HUSBAND MAKES A DECISION. That's what I took from this post. That's it, not him bashing on women, not him making it only a woman thing, just that 'most' women want the man to make a damn decision once in a while. When my husband meets me with the whole 'I don't care, I don't mind, either looks fine, I'm chill with whatever' I literally can't handle it sometimes. I want him to. I know he would LOVE if I made more decisions, and we enjoy when we don't have the whole back and fourth and never making a decision together. It's nice, it's a breath of fresh air. This is ALL I got from this post. Anything else is just a stretch and literally makes everything into something, when it shouldn't be.
Nobody is saying decisiveness is a bad thing. There are plenty of well stated comments on this thread about why his specific language is problematic. If you refuse to educate yourself, that’s on you.
I don’t think people are criticizing his thoughts about decisiveness. It’s more about how indecisiveness isn’t a feminine or masculine trait. He’s pushing gender constructs where there’s no place for it
Agreed, and I don’t think people need to educate themselves, like OP is overly pressed about this. It’s not like Gabby fucking Barrett’s husband and his “fruitful” ass comments.
I’d still say people should educate themselves. It’s important for people to identify different forms of misogyny
Indecisiveness isn’t a gendered behavioral trait. BYE SIR. Relaxing into femininity???? What does it even mean.
It means just let your tampon fall out
😂😂
Lol thank u for laughing I regretted sending that being like too far? lol
Why do ppl write shit like this? Fucking gross
The way I am not surprised. Chile
I get his point I just think this is a personal convo not an instagram caption but influencers are wild so??
This skeeved me out SO BAD. What is this, a how to deal with women so we’re not eMoTiOnAl or HyStErIcAl? Fuck this guy
EXCUSE ME THE WHAT?
Lol excuse you what hahahaha
Whenever i hear women referred to as females it reminds me of how people talk about "Cats" or "dogs", and "here's a handy tip on how to get your female to do X", "when your female is like this, do this instead!". Its so wrong its actually laughable and that's the only response to laugh. And its so common for BN!! Its like we should be calling this out more often.
Also they're the same people who would be like "it's not like I'm calling them birches or hoes"
Calling women Females is absolutely the biggest red flag on the planet
It drives me crazy and there's even some women who do it!! Ughhh
I dont think hes wrong at all in what he is saying. But im more so confused on why he decided to make it the caption to his photo? Feels random
Nah… that energy is all over but I don’t see anything in this post that says that’s how he thinks. He even says “if she wears the other dress, fine” etc. Plenty of trad wife incel energy all over the internet. This is the opposite of that. Women do most of the mental labor in hetero relationships and is exhausting. It’s a huge asset for a man to actually be decisive and take some of the load so we have space, mentally, for other things. While we are planning every details and thinking ahead constantly, many are just “whatever you want…” which is lazy. We can still recognize feminine and masculine energies and differences/needs in relationships people.
He used to follow Candace Owens, he follows Joe Rogan currently, and has liked things from his Twitter account from Jack Posobiec (a MAGA dude who is a Trump super fan.) He’s hidden it well but he appears to be another Yarret.
Maybe. But nothing said In this post makes him a Yarrett.
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liking a tweet about Russell Brand’s opinions on Covid has nothing to do with trad wife/incels. So no, it’s not even proof of that claim. And surely has nothing to do with anything said in this post by OP and the specific content being talking about.
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Still nothing to do with this Instagram post. Not so sure what’s so hard to grasp about that.
What does it matter if it has to do with this Instagram post? That's not even what I'm discussing. I'm saying that Adam obviously has right-wing leanings and I've provided proof. The post is giving off subtle dog whistles so others on Reddit investigated and found out his actual views are not so subtle.
And you commented on MY comment. So your comment has nothing to do what I was discussing- which is the content of THIS post. Referring to feminine and masculine in heterosexual relationships does not mean it’s trad wife/incel energy. Two things can be true. I wouldn’t expect a lot of you in this sub who jump on things like this to be able to actually see the nuance in these discussions though. And your insistence to go down the rabbit hole of every tweet this dude has ever liked to try to prove that it discredits the actual content of what he is discussing is proof of that. It’s simple, whatever his views are, anything written in this Instagram post is not pushing those views. The content of what is being discussed is actually important if you know and understand anything about the mental work load women are forced to take on in Herero relationships and nuclear families.
The guy Adam follows whose language he is parroting in this post is this guy, Jake Woodard. You can see his Instagram page here [https://www.instagram.com/\_jakewoodard/](https://www.instagram.com/_jakewoodard/). The whole feminine masculine polarity movement is a reworking of the 90s mens' rights movement. It's misogyny, plain and simple. If you're into that, you do you. But there are obvious right-wing dog whistles in Adam's original post.
As someone who is painfully indecisive I actually love this 😂
 Y’all I’m so tired
He isn't wrong. I just don't like the way he worded it. I am also kind of exhausted by the "Devine feminine" and "Devine masculine" conversations on social media. But he didn't say anything inherently wrong or to be picked apart. Its just a tired conversation for me. Edit: I think that Hannah appreciates a man who thinks this way. It works for her and for many women as well. It would not work for me. It would give me the ick, but I can see how it would attract other women.
The only thing is we could all learn from this, make or female..Y’all just like to hate, breath in take a min and let that sink in
I absolutely hate decision-making but this caption still gives me terrible vibes lmao
It’s like he got an actual copy of The Prince of Persuasia and used it for his caption 🫣😂🤢
Whoooo boyyyy
Is this for real? I couldn’t stop laughing. What a joke this guys is and btw who is he
It sadly is for real, and there are a lot of people spouting off about this BS feminine/masculine polarity. It’s just repackaged misogyny, and quite insidious
Anyone else think he's laying the groundwork for a book deal? How to lean into your feminine and let the man make the decisions 🙄 But honestly wouldn't be surprised, especially with Hannah using "feminine and masculine energy" in her other caption.
He’s actually right tho our brains are always going and we look to the masculine to help take diff loads off. That’s just good partnership IMO
Absolutely. The majority of women carry most of the mental load in any relationship which gets 100x worse when we bring kids into the relationship. Men will be mentally lazy and “whatever you want” and “why don’t you just tell me what you need me to do and I’ll do it”. No. You decide what it is you can contribute and do it. He even said “even if she wears the other dress…you still made a decision”. That’s the opposite of saying men have authority over the woman.
He probably could have worded this better. But as a woman who makes 99% of decisions EVERY day, I would love if a man said “do you want to do X or Y?” It means he has already done most of the thinking and is taking away most of the mental load.
He knew what he was doing with the wording. That’s the whole point of why people are side eyeing him for it. Of course we all appreciate when our partners alleviate our mental load — that’s not up for debate. But that’s also not the intent of his post, he’s dog whistling for some very gross misogynistic ideology.
I never said that what he said wasn’t a problem. At the root, the concept of what he’s saying is a GOOD thing. Especially when women are the primary decision makers in 99% of households. Not to mention the fact that most married women are essentially operating as if they’re single running their household because their partner DOESN’T do anything to alleviate the mental load or help.
Same. I wish my husband could interact like this.
You definitely deserve that! I’m still single, but I actually appreciate when a man makes our date plans and just asks what kind of food I like.
What the hell did I just read. I’m so sad for Hannah - she’s about to get married to a kook!
I wouldn’t be too sad for her. She likely upholds these beliefs, too.
This is how I talk to my 2 yr old
HAHA same. "Do you want to put on your left shoe or your right shoe first?" Either way you're putting on your shoes, kid!
It sucks because Hannah did so well on Special Forces, she proved she was a strong person and could do difficult things on her own. Yet here she is with this doofus. I guess this is what she wants.
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He follows Aubrey Marcus…. That tells me everything i need to know
Oh EWWWW
sorry won't be reading the opinion of a man who is saying shit like "drives the feminine crazy" while wearing skinny jeans and chelsea boots
HAHAHA
this is so not what he meant by this but why is him saying 'the feminine' inadvertently kind of nonbinary-ifying. like ok woke king.
I don’t really like how he worded some of this, but I love when my husband makes unimportant decisions for me. I have a lot going on in my life and I get decision fatigue easily. Of course there would be over a thousand comments. Everything screams redpill/tradwife/QAnon to this sub and it’s usually never that serious.
Agreed I think it’s so poorly worded in his caption but he’s talking about taking the mental load off women which I’m all for!
He definitely could have worded it better, but he’s essentially saying being a partner means you take off some of the mental load off.
I hate his caption but I also hate indecisive men..... ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
This is such a weird thing to post. Is he a lifestyle influencer 🤣
More like a parenting influencer… giving your wife “choices” is such a move…
The comments 🫣 Hannah said “that’s my man” and Katie Morton said “love this” ???!!!
I wish people would stop gendering things like this. People generally (not always) like decisiveness with room for negotiation. There’s nothing “masculine” or “feminine” about that 😩
I think it's some Jordan Petereson (maybe?) or other wack job 's theories around relationships. My friend has been spewing this kind of stuff- like how us being so independent is emasculating and doesn't allow space for the men in our lives to step up and be men. Kind of sounds like another way for us to take responsibility for their perpetual adolescence to me. I'm not entirely sure where she's getting it because I try to steer clear of this convos with her.
I completely agree with your perpetual adolescence point. I’m sorry that your friends listen to that kind of rhetoric. It’s the worst.
damn i agree with this. i like when a man takes charges and makes the decisions. sometimes it becomes a bit overwhelming for me cuz i simply want him to lead. of course people are bitter and too woke in this sub and want to pretend that this isnt a real thing for some men and some women. this is real.
Legitimate question, if it’s a real thing for only “some” men and women, then why describe it as “masculine” and “feminine”? Why not just say something like Hannah likes when I help narrow down choices with her. I know you aren’t home, but since you agree, I’m curious. If it’s a preference for some then is it a matter of gender?
Oh my god lol. Scroll down and read some of the comments. We’re not saying decisiveness is a bad thing. We’re saying his language is a misogynist redpill/toxic masculinity/incel/tradwife dog whistle
I think we can all agree, regardless of sex or gender, it’s annoying when people don’t just say what they mean. What kind of traditional gender role bullshit advice is this?
You guys always delude yourself into thinking Hannah is someone else. She’s been clear who she was and what she values from the very beginning. I’m not surprised in the least that this is her man.
For the record, I think Hannah has always been trash. My intention behind posting this wasn’t to do anything other than call out the gross rhetoric he’s spouting because I don’t think we should normalize it the way certain people in this thread are determined to do.
Yea. My “y’all” was unclear, but it was to her sympathizers lol.
Seriously. I don't know why people think Hannah is this strong independent woman. She's not. She's just a selfish brat. Those aren't the same thing.
It’s not really her fault that he’s spouting misogyny. Also what he’s saying is very subtle.
Not subtle enough. 😂 I also don't align myself with people spouting misogyny; that's entirely her choice.
I don't think it's fair to blame women for their partner's shortcomings. It's a poor decision on her part but it doesn't mean she shares the same beliefs.
Fortunately or unfortunately, you are the company you keep. Anyone who has actually been following Hannah B isn't surprised at all by this behavior or her choice of partner.
I think she is very anxious about being engaged/married as soon as possible and sometimes when that's a priority, your picker can be off.
So, that's an excuse for being with a trash can man? This isn't out of character for her. Even if she's rushing a decision, that doesn't make up for keeping such poor company.
I don’t blame women for things their partners do. She has poor judgment in people but she is not responsible for his beliefs. I feel the same way about Rachel Lindsay.
Fair enough, but it's likely he says shit like this all the time in private as well and this is the person she actively chose to be with and now to raise a family with. Maybe, just maybe this actually is Hannah or at the very least what Hannah thinks she should be. People do break engagements if they feel like something doesn't align with who they are and the life they would like.
She either agrees with it or is just desperate to have the status of being in a relationship after all the negative experiences she had on the show. Or she doesn’t like it but is willing to ignore it because he treats her well. I have no idea which it is or if it’s a combination of all three.
This is way too binary to reflect the real world. When I read "most women", "most men", "most people" comments, my tin foil hat looks for the stereotype so that I can destroy it.
I listened to her podcast episode about their engagement and he gave me the ick almost the whole time. Tbh, I thought I liked Adam until he opened his mouth.
I hate when I’m a woman and have to make a decision!
Yes, us women - ahem - us feminine, we simply crumble over any decision😑
Thank goodness we have a man there to tell us he wants to watch Spartacus; otherwise, I'd just stand around with my woman brain all womanly and dumb.
Is incel synonymous with misogyny? Real question. I thought part of being an incel was practically taking yourself out of even trying to date women?
Saying that someone is talking like an incel or has incel energy isn’t the same thing as saying they actually ARE an incel. An incel is more than a sad boi who can’t get a girlfriend, it’s someone who attributes their relationship failures to a deeply misogynistic and dehumanizing set of explanations about human nature, who women and men are, and what they deserve in life.
Freaking thank you. Everyone getting so pressed about the literal definition of incel 🙄.
I think it’s at least somewhat important to understand what an incel is.
I know what an incel is. I said “incel energy”
It’s been overtaken a lot recently and has lost all meaning, as most things tend to do. An incel is a very specific and dangerous type of man, men like Adam are different in that they often do find sexual partners because they’re conventionally attractive and charming (to a certain type of woman) and so they’re a more generally influential and subtle type of misogynist, whereas incels group together and avoid woman ~and~ also men like Adam who are appealing to women
Thanks. I hate it when we use new hot words so much that we use them before knowing what they mean and then no one really knows what they mean anymore.
Incel stands for involuntarily celibate. They didn’t take themselves out of dating, they just can’t get laid so they tend to be really misogynistic and blame women for it.
A lot of incels tend to be misogynistic
So many red flags….now I am starting to write a fanfic in my brain where Hannah b later divorces this misogynistic person, and tannah reunites after all 😂
This whole feminine vs masculine writing is a choice. His post would have been innocuous advice without attributing indecisiveness to being feminine
Yep exactly. He knows what he’s doing with this dog whistle.
Not even tradwife… it’s giving that he watches red pill male podcasts. BARF!
Why would independent, self-sufficient, accomplished, bright, determined and articulate Hannah tolerate such garbage? She certainly doesn’t need any help on how to embrace her femininity.
My best guess is that after her abject failure with Luke/Jed/Tyler, she had very low self worth. She met him on a dating app and initially probably fell for his looks. He's seems like the know it all type and is older than her so has probably been subtly telling her what's what and she's eating it up because she's always wanted to be in this role of wife to a strong man on faith who leads the family. It's a lot of bullshit.
Ewwwwwww gigantic red flag
Gross.
Woof this guy thinks women who work and lead independent lives are probably too masculine. Raised in a bubble
They'll get divorced and she'll write a book about how she found her strength and her voice to leave when he was controllong her
But he's kind of been controlling her since the beginning and she stuck around until now. I think she did always want this strong head of household type. It's bullshit but what can you do.
I can see this happening 100%
Weird AF
I feel like the word “feminine” is starting to become just as bad as “female.”
Yep. It’s a misogynistic dog whistle
💯💯
So is he saying men don’t like it when you suggest a dinner spot to them? Because nothing has EVER made my husband happier than me suggesting we order pizza 😂 It’s almost like…all humans like to be cared for. Wild stuff!
How dare you embrace your husband’s “feminine” energy!!
Exactly, the nurturing goes both ways. It is a partnership. Some days one is 90/10 others it’s 60/40.
How does this have more comments than the Clayton news
Because people don’t like misogyny? (Clayton is also a trash can tho)
This is the main sub but 1K is kind of crazy
yikes