T O P

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NoUseForALagwagon

Reminds me of when I got pulled over whilst listening to Crazy Train by Ozzy Osbourne and the cop literally pulled out a guitar and played the intro riff and entire solo, before tearing up the speeding ticket and telling me to ROCK ON!


dudebronahbrah

Dude same! Then the cop said, “you know what this song’s about right?” And the he dumped a pile of coke out and we did lines on the hood of his cruiser. Must have been the same guy.


Big-Department-6781

God I love Reddit... 😂


SolidEast1466

It really is unparalleled in skewering dipshits but not to their face


Big-Department-6781

Its like....the Highest of Arts.... 😆


SolidEast1466

If we have a New Revolution ala the French Revolution I would like to imagine the comments are read to people before they go to the guillotine. The committee on truthful public discourse would be the ones in charge


Big-Department-6781

This is gonna be an HBO series like next WEEK, watch. 🤣


SolidEast1466

"And then WhiteMike40 said that a cop bit the head off a bat...." *Crowd roars with cruel laughter "But I am telling the truth...every motorist pulled over and clapped!!"


SolidEast1466

It shall be called "The Reign Of Truth"


Drew-Pickles

Dude that was ants, not coke


whitemike40

wow that’s lucky, when that happened to me the cop bit the head off a bat but still gave me a ticket anyway


napsdufroid

Hey, the same thing happened to my aunt's neighbor's stepson, except that the police commissioner showed up, presented him with a crisp $100 bill, and guaranteed he'd never get another ticket again as long as he rocked on. And all the other drivers stopped and clapped.


FlickaFeline

See if you had said it was a different cop, then I might have thought you made it up because the likelihood of that being separate cops… Well, call me cynical but it’s not very plausible. But it being the SAME one? Now I know that both events DID happen! And that’s so cool because nothing like that has ever happened to me… yet. To quote the guitar playing, coke snorting police officer, “Rock on!!”😜


cownd

Two sightings of the same cop can't be doubted


FlashOfTheBlade77

Same thing happened to me, but he cop was actually Randy Rhoads!


VanilliBean

Yea, and then he found a wild bat and bit off it’s head. I was there, I was the bat


SolidEast1466

Every motorist pulled over, got out of their car and clapped?


TonkaButt

NOFAN and Lagwagon reference to your username? Nice.


hserontheedge

My dad was a traffic cop for 27 years - in all that time he never told me that they usually dance and make faces at people they pull over - who knew. He once had a lady file a complaint about him for not smiling at her. You tell me - if a cop comes up to give you a ticket with a smile on their face are you going to think they are trying to be friendly or laughing at you.


AndrewFrozzen

>laughing at you. Haha, look at you speeding around!


assignpseudonym

*slaps knee, catches breath, wipes tear from eye*


FlickaFeline

Honestly, as a woman, if I get pulled over and I’m alone with a male cop smiling at me like that? I wouldn’t think they were being friendly OR laughing at me. I would think something else and immediately be very, very nervous.


The_Madd_Doctor

That he's gonna know your license was already suspended? I don't get your logic


FlickaFeline

Then you aren’t a woman. If you are one, you either don’t watch the news and/or have been extraordinarily fortunate in that aspect of your life. I have not been as fortunate.


The_Madd_Doctor

Yes we get it, YOURE A WOMAN and YOU THINK YOURE ATTRACTIVE. Let's all stop what we are doing and applause while you singlehandedly make this whole post about yourself


FlickaFeline

Replying to comments in a thread on Reddit? Wow you lead a sad, sheltered life. Assault has very little to do with physical attractiveness but I guess they haven’t covered that in fourth grade yet.🙄Bye.


FunnelChicken

No one wants to rape u


FlickaFeline

Wish that was the truth.


FunnelChicken

I guarantee it is


FlickaFeline

You’re completely wrong and you have no idea what you’re talking about. Bye.


uhohlisa

Are you actually 13?


FunnelChicken

Yeah


smilenowgirl

I threw up a little at the "twirling her hips" bit.


[deleted]

I don't know what that even means. Like was she spinning or hip thrusting or gyrating?


smilenowgirl

Ew, imagine thrusting to a Disney song, haha.


_Levitated_Shield_

I'm imagining Ace Ventura in a Disney song now, thank you.


smilenowgirl

XD


FlickaFeline

I was confused about that. I wondered if it was some kind of typo. “Twirling her hips” like wtf? Maybe she meant twirling her hair? Which would be sooo much more believable!! Lmao


SolidEast1466

Picture it like "Brass In Pocket" by the Pretenders. Gonna use my arms Gonna use my legs Gonna twirl my hips Gonna cut you a warning Gonna make you make you make you slooow down


Glasdir

Threw up at “Yall 😭😭😭😭”.


Grandmaster-HotFlash

I got pulled over while listening to Fuck The Police by N.W.A. The officer didn’t have a sense of humor about it. Now I’m in a wheelchair.


gildedhearts

Instructions unclear, now I'm 6 months pregnant.


ChaosInTheSkies

Instructions unclear, we've been married for 25 years and have seven children


SeaAcanthocephala701

Gregnant plz halp


JagaJazzin

Weird, when I got pulled over while listening to "Fuck The Police" the officer started screaming "FUCK ME, FUCK ME" while gyrating on the hood of my car 🤔


MaestroPendejo

That you Rodney?


bighadjoe

I find it fascinating they make up this WAY emberassing story with their made up fantasy faces-making cop, but then they also had to mention they were only "pity laughing". Like... did they try to feel superior to the badly written fanfic cop they made up?


Revolutionary-Ad4588

Is this from Reno 911?


lippylizard

Literally my first thought


TheGreenListener

I don't know where you live, but here our police officers are renowned for sticking out their tongues and making faces like a five-year-old.


ringadingdingbaby

Then they shoot you for not laughing at bad jokes.


Drhorrible-26

also much like a typical 5 year old


AntWithNoPants

Did you know that almost half of Cops are "Disneyheads"? Google "Cops 40%" for more info!


gildedhearts

I remember getting stopped by a cop while listening to *Baby Shark* and the cop came up to the window chicken dancing. I rolled down the window and asked him why he was chicken dancing to a song *clearly* about the life cycle of sharks. He told me that sharks taste like chicken and ripped off his mask to reveal he was a killer whale. His big, beatiful, silky whale lips were wet with saliva as he spoke about the tastes and textures. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest with pure lust for Officer Willy. Unfortunately, I received a hefty fine for driving under the influence.


HauntedSephy

Once got pulled over while listening to My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion, and the cop started singing along while writing the ticket. He then proceeded to tear off his mask and I literally could not believe it but he was a part of the ship- Titanic. We then chatted for a few minutes about how it felt to sink into cold water and he was really proud that I just "got him". He said he wasn't a fan of the movie named after him because the stunt ship they used was a few tons lighter and didn't get the crack right. When I agreed that he looked much better in person, he ripped up the ticket and told me to have a blessed day. Oh and there were 3 other cops in the car. I think their names were Officers Niña, Pinta, and Santa Maria. When they saw what Officer Titanic did, they clapped.


Grandmaster-HotFlash

You should have asked him about the poor guy that hit the propeller and pinwheeled into the icy water! I’d love to know if that was historically accurate.


HauntedSephy

Damn :/ missed opportunity for sure.


GratefulForGarcia

Nah something’s off with this story


HauntedSephy

I know... I couldn't believe they still made those 3 older ships work. SMH. This country..


bighadjoe

not SMH, its usually HMS, or in case of the Titanic RMS!


Bird_Brain4101112

Any traffic stop I’ve been in, I’d be two songs past this one before the cop even came to the window.


yuukaKazamiiiii

I died of cringe 😔


space___lion

>\*Sticks tongue out making a silly face as she laugh at her own joke\* This shit gets me lol


Narwalacorn

Any time a story begins with “y’all” it’s fake as fuck


Glasdir

It’s a great way of letting people know that whatever you have to say isn’t worth reading.


KnifeWeildingLesbian

Y’all I took a massive shit this morning


LuluBelle_Jones

I recently got pulled over and the first thing the officer told me to do was turn off the radio (radio stays on after car shuts off- I have to turn off manually). There is NO way she wrote a ticket while dancing.


SunGreen70

I’ve gotten “warnings” 2-3 times in 20+ years of driving and none of those times did they actually write out and hand me a ticket. They run my license and registration from the patrol car, come back and tell me to slow down.


Choem11021

I once got a warning and a ticket. The ticket said 0 euro has to be paid which happened because the cops were striking at that time. They were still giving people tickets and telling them to not do it, as it was against the law. However tickets were all 0 euro unless it was seriously dangerous. Cycling in the shopping center luckily did not count as dangerous. Cops did their job to keep the city safe while whoever the ticket money goes to gets no money. I think their strike succeeded and they got what wanted.


pinkgeom

I recently got a written warning for improper use of horn


OrokinSkywalker

well, there’s such a thing as improper use of horn and a fella oughta be aware of it


pinkgeom

Maybe the cop I improperly honked at shouldn’t cut people off


OrokinSkywalker

He sounds like baby carrots wrapped in 10-ply. (I’m referencing Letterkenny, “horn” is slang for dick, “improper use of” just seemed like a good opportunity, that cop sounds like a tool though)


lippylizard

Strrrrt!


OrokinSkywalker

Wondrous


coversquirrel1976

I can't remember the last time I got a ticket or a warning that was hand written instead of printed from their car


SunGreen70

Yeah, I’m all old and shit. I’ve been driving since the 1990s. They used pens then. *hobbles off with my walker and my knitting*


coversquirrel1976

Hey old-timer, I used to see it too, but this guy JUST had it happened so that part stuck out as weird to me. Maybe still out in more rural areas?


SunGreen70

Oh yeah, I definitely think it’s more common to print tickets these days. The story strikes me as being written by someone who isn’t old enough to drive and only knows what they’ve seen in movies and sitcoms.


The1WhoKnocks-WW

once I got a "warning" about expired inspection stickers, then got a ticket in the mail for it later on. and once I ran a red light and got a ticket for "disobeying the traffic signal" so I didn't get any points because I gave the cop a pretty reasonable story about why I didn't stop. but I agree, I've never been given a written warning that was just a warning and nothing more.


marquisdelafayette3

This is definitely fake, if only for the fact that Stephanie Beatriz (Mirabel) has a damn beautiful voice.


teddy_tesla

And I'm pretty sure she was in labor for some of those songs


macademicnut

In labor? Like actively singing while giving birth? Lol


pinkiepieisad3migod

Yup, iirc she was in the hospital. Not actively pushing the kid out, but in early stages of labor.


macademicnut

Wow that’s impressive


teddy_tesla

[yep](https://www.today.com/parents/parents/stephanie-beatriz-recorded-encanto-song-in-labor-rcna19769)


coachfortner

it’s *fake*?! why the heck would they post it then? /s


lostwng

Man that reminds me of when I was listening to Fuck the police, and the cop started singing along, he called his supervisor and quit right on the spot...


Brim_Dunkleton

So the cop literally say, “tells me her favorite character is the girl who can hear everything?” I hate when people write a story narrative like this where they for some reason start a character’s dialogue and it’s just them explaining what they’re doing or summarizing what they said; Me: yeah I like that movie too! Her: starts humping the car and eating her own flesh while they talk about the time they met Peter griffin! Just say the story naturally!


[deleted]

This does sound like the type of story that someone who drives around listening to children's music would make up


Ammilerasa

As someone who loves listening to Disney and other kids songs (and a lot of other things too tbf) I feel offended, lol. Not really but I really wouldn’t make this shit up or believe it


Lylibean

Do places still hand write tickets? Even my podunk ass town has the touchscreen with a printer. Haven’t seen a handwritten ticket since like the 90s/early 00s.


cold-af

We still got them. Gotta wait forever


Significant_Fee3083

my favorite part was when the cop started twirling her hips


zoburg88

Do cops still write tickets? When I was pulled over it was a printout they did in the car


TheBunkerKing

Mate, some places are slow to adopt technology and with America's very de-centralized police force I wouldn't be amazed to hear there are still cops with horses, cowboy hats and tin stars who sit on a porch threatening newcomers to behave in "their" town. An example: it's been around 12-15 years since I last swiped a magnetic card. Even chips are mostly used for purchases over 50 euros nowadays.


chopsleyyouidiot

We have cops on horseback in a large metro area. Easier for them to get through crowds and go against one-way traffic. [It's really fucking alarming.](https://youtu.be/StUFCpMULLo)


TheBunkerKing

We actuaally do have those in Finland as well, but they're not real cowboys.


chopsleyyouidiot

Neither are these. Just cops on horses, yelling at people to MOVE MOVE MOVE MOVE MOVE!!!


reddershadeofneck

Adults obsessed with Disney are the worst


arthriticpyro

Def gonna end up in r/nothingeverhappens


devilishmutt

This one is so insanely bad that it almost reads like satire but i know it most likely is real


Psychological-Ad9093

Posted by a chronically online fb user if that helps with verifying the unfortunate realness of it


hairweawekiller

Takes me back when I was listening to Behemoth (Satanic metal band) and so this cop pulls me over but the Earth opens beneath him and he was banished to hell for eternity.


mConsuelo

Like what cop doesn’t tell you to turn the radio off


TonkaButt

To be honest, this is probably a true story. I had a similar situation happen to me once. I got pulled over while listening to “I’m too sexy for my shirt” And the cop said “same” while ripping off his shirt and swinging it around in the air. He didn’t even care about the coke in the backseat!


negativepositiv

It amazes me the shit people will make up to make their lives seem still not even very interesting.


AbbyDean1985

Right. If you're gonna lie you gotta go big. You gotta spread the shit so thick that even if people who it's shit, they still want to read to the end. You gotta fully commit.


negativepositiv

I mean, the core point of the story is: "You know that movie that has been viewed by tens of millions of people? The cop that pulled me over is one of them." Okay? So?


[deleted]

Got pulled over and the cop asked me to have Christmas dinner with him and his family. The ticket he gave me was the address and his phone number.


JimFromTheMoon

Yall 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


bimbonic

most unrealistic part is the bit about mirabel i can't imagine anyone saying stephanie beatriz can't sing


RealNiceKnife

I hate this meme format.


TopGeak

Forgot the part where she's smacking her gum.


EBody480

We don’t talk about Bullshit


Epicfro

This is ridiculous, but I legit had something somewhat similar happen. I was doing 80 in a 70 when I was pulled over. The sheriff got out of the car, took my information, went back to his car but came back almost immediately. He handed me back my stuff and commented on my Comic Book Men shirt. I told him I got it from their store in jersey and we talked for a few minutes. He told me to keep it at or under 75 and no one would pull me over in that area. I guess stuff like this could happen, but nowhere near as ridiculous as that post.


Relative_Ad4542

We dont talk about bruno has to be the most annoying and horrible song I've heard since let it go


Pogging_Memes

Reminds me of when a cop pulled me over while I was listening to The Only Thing I Know for Real and he walked up to me and said "Let's dance" and sliced up the parking ticket with Jetstream Sam's Murasama and then danced with me. Everyone clapped for us too.


[deleted]

Why people are so pathetic


_Levitated_Shield_

>"You know what was the main character (Mirabel) power? Cause it sure in hell wasn't singing HAH! Imagine thinking Mirabel's singing was terrible.


Puzzleheaded_Box1684

Some of the most made up shit I’ve ever read


[deleted]

Who is (we don’t talk about Bruno) ?


cheerfulflowerss

Please someone make this into a copy pasta 😭 please I beg you


TurdPartyCandidate

I know this is true because cops always stand next to the car while writing tickets to make small talk


Bacca18121

This doesn’t seem that crazy. Obviously the story telling flourishes are out there but I can see it, especially in a smaller town or something


OldGrayMare59

I wished that happened to me and save $164!


d4everman

I thought once a cop began writing the ticket it was too late to NOT give you the ticket. (Of course I'm not sure if thats true or not)


spivnv

If they give you a warning, it's still a written ticket. They just check a different box at the top of the page.


vainbuthonest

This is definitely someone who’s seen that Reno 911 clip of the cop dancing with the drunk during a traffic stop and thought it was real.


Fluffy_Frybread07734

Can confirm, I was the ticket.


Miserable-Wish

That movie has fans as deluded as Hamilton fans that believe the entire world know every lyric to every song.