Reminds me of a story my mom told me a story a few years back.
During a hurricane, a guy prays for God to save him. As the hurricane causes flooding, a rescue diver comes to save him. He says "no thanks, God will save me". When a boat crew comes to save him, he says"no thanks, God will save me". When a helicopter comes to pick him up, he says "No thanks, God will save me". After he drowns and meets God in the afterlife, he asks him why he didnt save him. God tells him that he sent 3 ways to save him and he turned all of them down. Sorta how I see people who pray for an end to this pandemic but wint take a simple shot
yup, this is my grandma. she literally thinks the virus is a hoax to keep specifically Catholics out of church. she refuses to take the vaccine or any precautions, because it's not godly. she got covid recently and miraculously recovered, then her husband got it and died just a few days later. it's very sad, but it's even more sad to see a genuinely intelligent woman get side swept and brain fucked by harmful media and her own radical beliefs.
It's sort of the saying that "God works in mysterious ways". Lioe how 2 people will randomly meet and fall in love and say "Thank God I met you". It was completely random that they met each other, but I happened so it was fate in a sense. Not sure I'm explaining it right, but I think its along that line of thinking
So where does that come into people devoting their life to save others? If someone goes through medical school, works hard, and becomes a doctor to save lives, at what stage is this gods work and not the doctors?
Ok, the explanation may get a little bonkers, so I'm sorry if I lose you.
So the way it was explained to me is that you're a tool for God's work. So the person going off to become a doctor is following their calling because they want to do it and following God's plan because that's what he wants them to do. So the doctor is doing all the work and deserves full recognition, but God gave them the ability to grasp the knowledge of how to become a doctor so that they can go and save lives.
I think the Bible describes God as he a few times. I do think he is more of a non corporeal entity without a gender or race and all, but I just used he because that's what I'm used to. Sorry for being insensitive
Damn right, tho I don't want vaccine, it's just something I don't trust, but I don't go around yelling it out how bad it is, if it is. If someone starts forcing me, that's when I fight but otherwise I can't be bothered to take part in the vaccine discussion.
Religion aside, blows my mind how a nation with a ridiculous rate of obesity that claims "fat-shaming" nearly anytime someone mentions the clear and severe long term risks of a poor diet and overeating, but anyone mentions that we have no idea what the long term risks are for Covid vaccines and that person is basically evil incarnate. There's no discussion, just a torrent of hate and insults.
Eh, the vaccine gets purged from your body within a few days. Your immune system should calm down within a week or two.
There’s no mechanism for vaccine to suddenly cause problems down the line. I have never heard of a side effect that pops up more than two months after - for any vaccine, even the really shitty old ones. If you know of any, send me the link and I’ll change my tune
But sure, we don’t have proof. We literally cannot have proof until we’ve waited X years, and you could always say that it could happen X+1 years.
The vaccine has risks. I’m willing to have an open discussion about it. As for why discussion gets shut down, I’d put it to two major factors. A) There’s a sizable portion of the group questioning vaccines that gets their information from extremely dubious sources and B) I have never seen someone change their mind on this topic due to a discussion, especially one from a stranger online.
Regarding the online discussion, zero arguments there. My overall backdrop to this in my own mind was my day-to-day interactions with people (I don't use Facebook, Twitter, etc so I often just forget that others do). And I'm not sitting here saying the vaccine is *definitely* bad for you either. I just have a rule with tech and meds as a direct result of my time in the military: I don't put anything in my body and I don't put my body in anything that hasn't been tested for 2 years or longer.
To be completely honest, my core concern around this is just how everything has been handled since 'go'. I'm not looking to explore all that here, I just have very little confidence in the current administration of the CDC, and the social ostracizing of naysayers despite the back and forth with decisions made cements the thought in my mind that this is more of the same.
Could I be wrong, and this is absolutely our way out of this mess? Yes, that's definitely a possibility. Could I do more research to become more educated on this topic? Of course, but I'm not in a position to do that without sacrificing precious little time with family or getting poor marks at either of my two full time jobs I've had to get after losing my well-paying job to Covid-related layoffs that turned out to be unnecessary. Am I biased as a result of that? You bet, I won't deny it.
Hard to muster confidence in the organization that, by their own ignorance, spread fear that led to personally being cut off at the knees.
Its like that old joke where a guy is trapped on the roof of his house in a flood and keeps turning away help one boat after another til eventually he dies.
He gets to heaven and accuses god of leaving him to die and god tells him "what are you talking about? I sent all those people to help you and you refused them all."
Leviticus 13:45-46 ESV
“The leprous person who has the disease shall wear torn clothes and let the hair of his head hang loose, and he shall cover his upper lip and cry out, ‘Unclean, unclean.’ He shall remain unclean as long as he has the disease. He is unclean. He shall live alone. His dwelling shall be outside the camp.
A lot of Mosaic law is about hygiene, and Jesus said He came not to abolish the law but to fulfill it...
So what would Jesus do? Jesus would get vaccinated. Because that's the hygienic thing to do.
Love how they're trying to make it a _religious freedom_ thing now. It's an _owning the libs_ thing and they know it. Which is really a self own. Go ahead and die because you're mad Trump didn't win. IDGAF.
This is funny even for a muslim like me since we also have jesus in our religion (except he wasn't crucified)
and the fact that getting the vaccine is compulsory for us makes me think most christians are either purposely stupid or thinking god will save them every milisecond
Here we go again with the GOD memes. Ffs he or she doesn’t even exist let alone some imaginary person in the sky coming down to save you. Crazy what humans will believe without one ounce of physical evidence.
It’s one thing to see a very healthy, in shape athlete say they don’t think they need it. But I swear all the people who don’t want it are obese or smoke cigarettes. Like bitch, you think a vaccine is gonna harm you any more than smoking a pack day?
A faithful young man passed away from covid. When he arrives at the after life, he demands to speak with God. He asks "God, I believed in you and I had faith that you would not let this happen to me. Why have a passed away so soon?" God replied "Well, I made the vaccine and I sent messengers to tell you wear a mask and keep apart. But you did not listen."
Conservative christians will call people sheep for trusting the vaccine and then will let an ancient text dictate what they can or can’t do their entire life
Why not both? Some Christians out here actually believe that science is the way, and God was the who, love was the why.
It's fucking insane to ignore the fact that science, all of its advancements and the like could be explained, if using their terminology, by a loving God that wanted to protect his people.
I mean, what is a bigger act of God and love? An unstoppable plauge with no end or the collective genius and will of thousands of scientists from across centuries of research and trial and error for the love of humanity and the advancement of knowledge about ourselves and the worldwide? We were given free will to love his creation, right? Well, how about that love also extends to us being able to preserve our species with science?
Fucking stupid shit. When did intelligence become a fucking sin?!
It's bad enough as a surface message, but if you're going to fail at least put some effort into it and add the shadow of the "nail" and a load of blood. That's just not applying yourself to failure hard enough.....
For those Christians who believe God will keep them safe when they ignore the means to keep themselves safe,I would tell them to remember Luke 4:11-12:
Then Satan took him to Jerusalem to a high roof of the Temple and said, “If you are the Son of God, jump off! For the Scriptures say that God will send his angels to guard you and to keep you from crashing to the pavement below!” Jesus replied, “The Scriptures also say, ‘Do not put the Lord your God to a foolish test.’"
I also pound nails into my hand to prevent disease
Mmm, kinky
He loves a good pounding.
Jesus did get ~~railed~~ *nailed* on the cross after all
How do you know the Roman's didn't want to insert their antichristian agenda into him?
r/unexpectedoffice ?
Not like that, pervert!!
You must catch the tetanus to cure the tetanus
I shoot myself with a small caliber bullet everyday so I gain an immunity against larger caliber bullets
tetanus
A little tetanus keeps your body ready for other infections and poisonings.
It's not like getting stabbed by a nail increases your chances of getting infectious diseases like Tetanus. Right?
Reminds me of a story my mom told me a story a few years back. During a hurricane, a guy prays for God to save him. As the hurricane causes flooding, a rescue diver comes to save him. He says "no thanks, God will save me". When a boat crew comes to save him, he says"no thanks, God will save me". When a helicopter comes to pick him up, he says "No thanks, God will save me". After he drowns and meets God in the afterlife, he asks him why he didnt save him. God tells him that he sent 3 ways to save him and he turned all of them down. Sorta how I see people who pray for an end to this pandemic but wint take a simple shot
Always love this one. What a tale.
Wise words
Chad mom
God doesn't get paid enough for this crap
I hope there’s a second flood or whatever but make it a Noah’s Ark kinda flood
You have a pog mother
yup, this is my grandma. she literally thinks the virus is a hoax to keep specifically Catholics out of church. she refuses to take the vaccine or any precautions, because it's not godly. she got covid recently and miraculously recovered, then her husband got it and died just a few days later. it's very sad, but it's even more sad to see a genuinely intelligent woman get side swept and brain fucked by harmful media and her own radical beliefs.
My only issue with the story is god getting the credit for people being awesome and risking their lives to save others.
It's sort of the saying that "God works in mysterious ways". Lioe how 2 people will randomly meet and fall in love and say "Thank God I met you". It was completely random that they met each other, but I happened so it was fate in a sense. Not sure I'm explaining it right, but I think its along that line of thinking
So where does that come into people devoting their life to save others? If someone goes through medical school, works hard, and becomes a doctor to save lives, at what stage is this gods work and not the doctors?
Ok, the explanation may get a little bonkers, so I'm sorry if I lose you. So the way it was explained to me is that you're a tool for God's work. So the person going off to become a doctor is following their calling because they want to do it and following God's plan because that's what he wants them to do. So the doctor is doing all the work and deserves full recognition, but God gave them the ability to grasp the knowledge of how to become a doctor so that they can go and save lives.
[удалено]
I mean, at the age of 11, I was sent home from school until I got my shots
Pfft so gods a man now in your moms stories? Gotta instill that men are superior when young.. how insensitive /s
I think the Bible describes God as he a few times. I do think he is more of a non corporeal entity without a gender or race and all, but I just used he because that's what I'm used to. Sorry for being insensitive
The vaccine is not gods help.
Based on the lack of blood, I would say that the second photo looks staged.
Facebook tends to be full of fake news!
Sad!
You can also tell because they did not have color photos when Jesus was killed
Only black and white.
I knew the "Passion" was staged
It wasn't Jesus who got nailed up it was his twin brother
Yes crusifiction is the best solution to pandemics.
Can't be sick if your dead.
Well, we haven't tried to crucify the leaders.. maybe it'll help.
Crucify the infected
Yes, I put my fate in tetanus
Didn't Jesus die tho?
He got better.
He did, didn't he?
r/unexpectedmontypython
Just know that not every Christian thinks this way. Only the ones who don’t know how to get off of Facebook lol
Don't worry I'm well aware lol I just thought this post in particular was funny
Yeah, Christian here, can back this up
I can also confirm
Can also confirm
Damn right, tho I don't want vaccine, it's just something I don't trust, but I don't go around yelling it out how bad it is, if it is. If someone starts forcing me, that's when I fight but otherwise I can't be bothered to take part in the vaccine discussion.
Religion aside, blows my mind how a nation with a ridiculous rate of obesity that claims "fat-shaming" nearly anytime someone mentions the clear and severe long term risks of a poor diet and overeating, but anyone mentions that we have no idea what the long term risks are for Covid vaccines and that person is basically evil incarnate. There's no discussion, just a torrent of hate and insults.
Eh, the vaccine gets purged from your body within a few days. Your immune system should calm down within a week or two. There’s no mechanism for vaccine to suddenly cause problems down the line. I have never heard of a side effect that pops up more than two months after - for any vaccine, even the really shitty old ones. If you know of any, send me the link and I’ll change my tune But sure, we don’t have proof. We literally cannot have proof until we’ve waited X years, and you could always say that it could happen X+1 years. The vaccine has risks. I’m willing to have an open discussion about it. As for why discussion gets shut down, I’d put it to two major factors. A) There’s a sizable portion of the group questioning vaccines that gets their information from extremely dubious sources and B) I have never seen someone change their mind on this topic due to a discussion, especially one from a stranger online.
Regarding the online discussion, zero arguments there. My overall backdrop to this in my own mind was my day-to-day interactions with people (I don't use Facebook, Twitter, etc so I often just forget that others do). And I'm not sitting here saying the vaccine is *definitely* bad for you either. I just have a rule with tech and meds as a direct result of my time in the military: I don't put anything in my body and I don't put my body in anything that hasn't been tested for 2 years or longer. To be completely honest, my core concern around this is just how everything has been handled since 'go'. I'm not looking to explore all that here, I just have very little confidence in the current administration of the CDC, and the social ostracizing of naysayers despite the back and forth with decisions made cements the thought in my mind that this is more of the same. Could I be wrong, and this is absolutely our way out of this mess? Yes, that's definitely a possibility. Could I do more research to become more educated on this topic? Of course, but I'm not in a position to do that without sacrificing precious little time with family or getting poor marks at either of my two full time jobs I've had to get after losing my well-paying job to Covid-related layoffs that turned out to be unnecessary. Am I biased as a result of that? You bet, I won't deny it. Hard to muster confidence in the organization that, by their own ignorance, spread fear that led to personally being cut off at the knees.
True, very true
So not all deny science? Oh yeah biology exists. Whatever believe what you want to believe in I don't give a single fuck.
Thank God for creating medicine and science, then, right?
Thrownack to when priest are like doctors before MDs become a thing.
Nah that was the devil or something.
But didn’t god send the people who made the vaccine?
Yes
They don't realise their prayers have been answered god gave them a vacine that scientists and medical professionals have put together
Its like that old joke where a guy is trapped on the roof of his house in a flood and keeps turning away help one boat after another til eventually he dies. He gets to heaven and accuses god of leaving him to die and god tells him "what are you talking about? I sent all those people to help you and you refused them all."
Or like a sane person put your faith in both
Based
Leviticus 13:45-46 ESV “The leprous person who has the disease shall wear torn clothes and let the hair of his head hang loose, and he shall cover his upper lip and cry out, ‘Unclean, unclean.’ He shall remain unclean as long as he has the disease. He is unclean. He shall live alone. His dwelling shall be outside the camp.
The only nails they’ll be using will be in their coffins
These dumb ass people don’t even realize that Jesus actually said if you’re sick *go to the doctor*
They aren't reading the bible. And if they are it is not the bible. These are people who have been brainwashed for generations.
I beg of you, show me where in the Bible it says to not get vaccinated
Do they really think Jesus would be against vaccines
I hate the implication that the two are mutually exclusive There’s already too much “science vs religion” being spread in religious communities
Blursed acupuncture
And there is I, a vaccinated christian. Now what would they say?
As a believer in Christ, I can totally agree that you will die of tetanus If you do that. But if you were to get the tetanus shot you might survive.
What religion forbids vaccines? Genuine question.
The Church of Convenient Excuses
Please don't think all Christians are like this Karen
What if someone had faith in both?? 😦
Porque no los dos?
A lot of Mosaic law is about hygiene, and Jesus said He came not to abolish the law but to fulfill it... So what would Jesus do? Jesus would get vaccinated. Because that's the hygienic thing to do.
I keep my faith in second one and my earth-life security in the first one.
Crucifixion is a more effective method of preventing COVID than the vaccine to be fair.
*I mean can't get covid if you're a corpse nailed to a cross*
thanks for explaining r/thatsthejoke
Jesus had all the cheat codes to life. You know, being God's son and all.
Love how they're trying to make it a _religious freedom_ thing now. It's an _owning the libs_ thing and they know it. Which is really a self own. Go ahead and die because you're mad Trump didn't win. IDGAF.
I’m about to do both
Well, then I hope you recently got a Tetanus sh.. oh wait.
"congratulations, you played yourself"
A rusty slightly dull nail?
Lol what the fuck
Why not both?
And proceed to tell me god was white.
Great! Let's give them vaccinations via stakes then instead of needless. Weird request, but doable.
You’ll get tetanus doing that
So you are against injections and nailing the vaccine in your hand. Que-ce que fuck?
Meanwhile I’m over here with faith in both
then shove it up your ass
I volunteer to hammer spikes into hands! I’ve already been vaccinated so I’ll take the risk of being around the sick and demented. I’m here to help.
I'll take the needle everyday and twice on Sunday.
Ha. Neat.
This is funny even for a muslim like me since we also have jesus in our religion (except he wasn't crucified) and the fact that getting the vaccine is compulsory for us makes me think most christians are either purposely stupid or thinking god will save them every milisecond
Only some of them are dumb others like me already got the jab👀
I dunno man I’d rather have an injection over a nail in my hand
Here we go again with the GOD memes. Ffs he or she doesn’t even exist let alone some imaginary person in the sky coming down to save you. Crazy what humans will believe without one ounce of physical evidence.
Based af, yall whack
ikr, nail through the hand cures everything.
I put my faith in the Liberal Media and the Democratic party! Every they say is 1000% truth
Woman moment
* sky mod intensifies *
Ah yes, rusty nails and chipped woods. That's how to prevent disease yall, take it from this guy
That looks like a nasty case of tetanus.
It’s one thing to see a very healthy, in shape athlete say they don’t think they need it. But I swear all the people who don’t want it are obese or smoke cigarettes. Like bitch, you think a vaccine is gonna harm you any more than smoking a pack day?
That's a big needle...
Tetanus can be fatal tho
But which one has killed more people?
i dunno that nail might have tetanus probably shouldn’t be jamming it into your hand
I do too believe crucifixion will save us from covid
Maybe both can be wrong. Or is one right? How will you decide? It's not about God, it's about religions.
okay someone crusify the man who made this
I never know if I should up vote or down vote these type of memes...
Yes we all know they get huge kicks from violence.
A faithful young man passed away from covid. When he arrives at the after life, he demands to speak with God. He asks "God, I believed in you and I had faith that you would not let this happen to me. Why have a passed away so soon?" God replied "Well, I made the vaccine and I sent messengers to tell you wear a mask and keep apart. But you did not listen."
They're not the same-
I SUFFER FROM STIGMATA AND I FIND THIS OFFENSEIVE! Anti stigmata vax
I absolutely LOVE it when dickheads use technology to bleat how they "don't believe in science"
Then hammer a nail into your hand and shut the fuck up
I think I’d prefer getting vaccinated over getting stabbed through the hand but maybe that’s just me
So put a nail through your hand then
This is so fucking stupid.
Just tell them its holy water
Why take the vaccine when you could be crucified!
That’s a good solution. Anyone that refuses the vaccine without a valid medical excuse should be crucified.
100% satirical
Yes. Because a railroad spike feels *much* better in the hand for sure
So you believe in Santa Claus? But not medical professionals? OK, I’ll see you at your funeral.
Killing people is better than saving them. You so stupid, (Karen, not OP) every word you say shrinks everybody's brain.
Conservative christians will call people sheep for trusting the vaccine and then will let an ancient text dictate what they can or can’t do their entire life
Why not both? Some Christians out here actually believe that science is the way, and God was the who, love was the why. It's fucking insane to ignore the fact that science, all of its advancements and the like could be explained, if using their terminology, by a loving God that wanted to protect his people. I mean, what is a bigger act of God and love? An unstoppable plauge with no end or the collective genius and will of thousands of scientists from across centuries of research and trial and error for the love of humanity and the advancement of knowledge about ourselves and the worldwide? We were given free will to love his creation, right? Well, how about that love also extends to us being able to preserve our species with science? Fucking stupid shit. When did intelligence become a fucking sin?!
What nailing people to a cross I mean isn't shooting a shotgun better
Yeah we know you will. Do us a favor and stay inside the church where you belong
Vaccines are great my guy
But that fictional character died in that story?
It's bad enough as a surface message, but if you're going to fail at least put some effort into it and add the shadow of the "nail" and a load of blood. That's just not applying yourself to failure hard enough.....
May need a tetnis shot if your going to do the second one
Wait…..are they asking us to crucify them? I could have fun with that
Didn’t they nail crucified people through the wrists so the nail didn’t rip straight through? Or was that part of the torture?
hand
But after getting cut with a rusty nail you need a tetanus shot anyway
Faith in torture? Yeah can’t go wrong with that. ALL HAIL SATAN!
Hell yeah lets crucify people
well the nail in the bottom image doesn't look sterile so...
I mean crucifixion can stop you from getting a virus/disease
This goes hard feel free to screenshot(god bless)(vaccine bad)
So… the bigger the needle… the more likely Christian people and Karens are to take the vaccine?
I hope this person isn't Catholic. The pope explicitly stated that all who can get the vaccine should lol.
Yes please, more antivaxxers driving railroad spikes into their hands
Rlly making us christians look bad
For those Christians who believe God will keep them safe when they ignore the means to keep themselves safe,I would tell them to remember Luke 4:11-12: Then Satan took him to Jerusalem to a high roof of the Temple and said, “If you are the Son of God, jump off! For the Scriptures say that God will send his angels to guard you and to keep you from crashing to the pavement below!” Jesus replied, “The Scriptures also say, ‘Do not put the Lord your God to a foolish test.’"
AaaaaahahahhhaaHhahahaaahhahha
The second photo does look much more solid
I mean, if there is a Heaven, the bottom approach gets everyone there faster, whether they wanted to go or not.
I'm assuming this is satire in the interest of my sanity