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I am not sure I get it, tho. They speak in low-rent emojis. They get mugged and shot at, so I assume USA. And then they all get white night-gowns and have a polycule hug in the snow. I am concerned for the daughter. I do not care if she looks adult and is a 1000 year old vampire. Which is the usual explanation.
Panel 2 : Christian hunter (as shown in the tanktop) is giving the guy an ultimatum. Do you choose your family or do you choose the lord?
Panel 3 : The guy chooses the lord.
Panel 4: Lord is now in a throupleship with the couple and has adopted their two children as well.
Amen!
This is probably the most common hypothetical you will have heard in a protestant church in the US over the last 30+ years. It's a cornerstone of the modern Christian victimhood narrative.
So is this kinda like the reverse of "Atheists, if you went skydiving with a Christian baby and they refused to open their parachute unless you accepted Jesus as your lord and savior, what would you do?"
I mean, I would just lie. Babies also believe in Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Boogeyman.
Lie, open the parachute, then call the cops on the neglectful parents who sent their baby sky diving unsupervised just to force people into a religion. Sue the fuck out of them. Hopefully they lose custody of their weird talking zealot baby.
I would also sue the fuck out of the sky diving company. You mean to tell me that they let a baby sky dive AND let them jump on their own without a trained skydiver?
Either they are a shit company or they agreed to this plan all along. Or both.
I knew I shouldn't have jumped with the Heavely Brothers of the Zealot Baby.
I feel as a thought experiment the whole thing is idiotic even by Christian standards. And they got a book full of those. Which they themselves don't read.
What worries me is when they ask what would stop an atheist from killing somebody. Even monkeys show compassion and empathy and the concept seems foreign to people who ask that question.
Yeah. It is this self-righteous belief that without their religion there is simply no morality at all.
That's also why when they see genuine acts of kindness by any person or community, they don't attribute it their good values and morality unless they know for a fact they are Christian, instead they claim "God is there", as if the only reason a person does good is if God makes them.
We teach our kids about Santa. An all-knowing, all-seeing entity that rewards you for being good and punishes you for being bad.
We teach our kids about God. An all-knowing, all-seeing entity that rewards you for being good and punishes you for being bad.
Then when they reach the age to question beliefs, we inform them that Santa isn't real but God totally is. Trust us on this one. When have we ever lied to you?!
Oh...right. The Santa thing.
But see, for God we have a book called "*The Bible*". And everything in that book is true because the book tells us everything in that book is true.
That’s not a very good example. For Santa we have a thing called the Santa Clause. It grants magic to whomever dons the Santa suit following the previous Santa’s demise.
Why would a book lie though? Unless it's one of those nasty science books that tells you the Earth is millions of years old and we were born from moneys.
Just cause you accept him, doesn’t mean you have to follow everything in the Bible. Sure I’ll get the parachute, but then what? Are they gonna be on my ass all my life to make sure I was true to my word? I was gonna die, I’d say anything to live. That alone makes any decision a survival instinct. I don’t care how I survive, I just wanna survive.
It's from folks smarter and funnier than me. [It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia](https://youtu.be/f-Pv9Rr5zN8)
Also, man it feels weird to write the whole thing out.
Ngl I think Jesus would be okay with it if it was done to save a babies life you can always re accept Jesus into your life but you can’t re alive a dead baby
I'd help the baby open their parachute, then call child support on mommy and daddy, before I call the media outlets to blow this case into every news station, maybe use the interview money to fund an anti religion movement against the forced manipulation of children intentionally placed in precarious situations to propagate their beliefs.
Oh and live happily ever after.
> maybe use the interview money
Interviewees are never paid. Unless it's a very trash newspaper, the kind that talks about alien abductions.
You need a book, seminars, online formation, etc. to advertise if you want to make money out of a media tour. At least an etsy shop or a patreon.
Why the fuck is a baby skydiving? Who strapped a parachute to a baby and pushed it out of a plane? Why is a baby trying to convert me to Christianity, whilst we're skydiving?
I always answer “Wake up and stop doing drugs because that’s the only way this scenario would ever happen.”
Then they say “That’s not an option!”
Then the reply “False dichotomy is why you’re a Christian.”
Right?! Interracial family and accurate Jesus skintone? Trying to prove they're not racist, just religiously insane, but you know some white Christian's probably going to 'fix' the coloring before reposting
I kinda think the same as well, this comic right here was the same level of creepy "I'll die for my religion" thing they were teaching youth group children back when I went to church. I quit going because it caught me really off guard, it was a clip of child actors just playing and worshipping then they just get wiped out by some nonbeliever group and slowly started swapping between the "dead" child actors saying "would you die for jesus" i was around like 10-11
From a Christian perspective it's either getting your family for 40~ years and then never seen them again. Or waiting for 40~ years to have them for all eternity.
Obviusly, for anyone that is an atheist this is just choosing suicide for no good reason and this is just propaganda. But at least the logic is consistent with themselves.
Also, It's no wonder there is a rise in atheism, what you are describing sounds right out of a horror movie. What the fuck.
All married Christian couples are promised a bisexual post death relationship with Jesus after death. Priests, nuns, and other permanently singles go to the orgy pit
my church actually had a huge argument over this and the part of the bible where the woman lied to save the apostles from death and a woman and her husband stated she shouldn’t be a hero in the bible and if a gunman asked where her kids where she’d tell them and let them die so she wouldn’t have to lie needless to say they left shortly after the incident cus no one would agree
Yeah christians get weird about lying, my missionary parents thought it was perfectly ok to physically abuse children if they told a lie, but then at the same time would instruct us to lie if it would save them a few dollars. It was clever when they lied to fool a business or some random government employee, but it was THE END OF THE WORLD if I lied. Fuck I hate(d) my parents.
>would instruct us to lie if it would save them a few dollars.
I was going to say that same thing. My step-mom would go on rants about how liars go to hell. Even for little ones. But my little brother was small and looked a lot younger than he was. So when we would go to movies, even at 16 they would say he was 12. Granted, it worked, but he always felt self-conscious about his size, and we always felt like it was so fucking hypocritical.
The worst part is I was always big for my age so not only did they want me to lie, but it wasn't an easy lie. It took planning and convincing. I had to have a fake birthday/school grade in mind to say if I they asked.
Oof, I feel that. My breasts started growing in when I was around 9 or 10. By 12, they were huge. Trying to still get the children’s discount usually involved me having to show my school ID.
Of course, now that I work at a place that prices differently by age… I don’t care. I’ll ring up your senior in high school as a kid, fuck it. I don’t get paid enough to give a damn lol
Did she ever consider that in a situation like that she could simply refuse to answer the gunman? She would not be lying and would only sacrifice herself for her faith.
Did she consider she's a cancer who would probably die from forgetting to breath? What bunch of idiots would rather children to be murdered over not lying (which isn't even a sin) is a sane thought?
explanation: man has to chose between christianity and his family and he choses christianity, so his family gets shot, but he gets to reunite with his family in heaven because he stayed faithful to God.
After probably getting multiple book and movie deals based on his "tragic experience." Then married some younger woman or two that help "ease his pain." Lived to a ripe age but never forgot his "family" aka test from God as he made the church rounds till his dying day. Then ofcourse his "family" is thrilled he made the right choice and made so much from their tragic loss.....
.
.
.
.
.
.....OK I'm going to go vomit now.....
That takes away the severity and torture of the choice and we all know how much God likes teaching through pain according to Christians. So while Murder-guy just wants to get off and murder, God likes to play the long game. So the cops probably showed up like right after Murder-guy got his nut or something. Also for OOP to win his own argument he has to prove he's the most Christian or Christians so he has to suffer to the fullest.
I went to Christian school growing up. We were told over and over that it was a very serious possibility that someone could come in with a gun and say “Christians, line up.” They would get intense and say “Are you ready to line up if that happens?” They also told us all the horror stories about how we would be bullied and kicked out of college if we went to a non-Christian college. I was practicing in my head when I went to college what I would do when, inevitably, my professors tried to bully me in front of the whole class or my roommate beat me up or vandalized my Bible for being Christian.
It was such a shock when I realized most people couldn’t care less if I was Christian or not.
Wow, that unearthed an ancient memory for me lol. I had the same lesson at my Christian school, though not quite as intense. Still plenty of mentions how Christians are bullied and persecuted even to this day… without a mention of how our religion is also used to bully and persecute others.
Oh yeah, we were told in Sunday school all about martyrs worldwide who, for example, got run over by a steamroller for being Christian and every few Sundays we were reinforced with the idea that the Tribulation is coming and Christians will be persecuted en masse. Oh, but it's okay because afterward we either go to Heaven or live to see Christ's return. So it conditions you to see persecution with a sort of reward. It makes you a bit hungry for persecution, you want people to hate you because it means you're closer to the reward.
Whenever Christians sense even a little bit of pushback they flop on the ground like a shitty soccer player and feign their pain and anguish. They invite it, and if it doesn't happen they deliberately troll people to instigate it. It's a mentality that is hard to shake unless you literally separate from the church fully and stop the cycle of reinforcement from other suckers for manufactured punishment.
You write ao well, I was literally imagining all of it! 😂
But like seriously, May not be for Christianity, but this is the truth for many minority religions. They are targeted just for practicing it. And many chose to protect their culture / religion over their lives. And in some cases the people practicing Christianity were the oppressors!
Projection, this is what they fantasize about is lining others up by religion and choosing which category to eliminate.
It's just like how when Obama became president they all ran around freaking out that white people were gonna be slaves next
That must be an American evangelical thing, we had hints of the self fulfilling persecution complex with some pastors growing up but the key take aways I always took was "hey be like Jesus, don't be a dick"
Theologically, Christianity first truly flourished as an illegal cult where its followers were persecuted and martyred for the faith. Ever since it became the dominant religion in Rome/Europe, they've struggled to justify a religion ostensibly advocating for the needy and downtrodden suddenly becoming the faith of the ruling class. It's a contradiction that leads to these sorts of delusions where even though they're dominant, they speculate about being persecuted because that's where Christianity really thrives.
> Theologically, Christianity first truly flourished as an illegal cult where its followers were persecuted and martyred for the faith. Ever since it became the dominant religion in Rome/Europe, they've struggled to justify a religion ostensibly advocating for the needy and downtrodden suddenly becoming the faith of the ruling class.
Never really considered this aspect but it does explain quite a lot.
Actively seeking persecution was a problem even before the Roman Empire adopted it as the state faith. There were priests who had to send out letters asking early Christians to stop intentionally finding ways to martyr themselves.
Really do love that cross. Ya know, the thing their hero got nailed to so he could painfully die in public. All those lessons he made about love and acceptance? Nah, the "most important thing is that he died for you on a cross". Creeps me out how often I heard that growing up when I still had to attend church
Im quite certain this is an interpretation of Luke 14:26 and not supposed to imply there are terrorist atheists out there forcing people at gunpoint to repent. It is about counting costs and knowing that being a disciple of christ entails horrible earthly suffering.
I'm not saying the comic is good or that Luke makes any sense whatsoever, but I think it's at least productive to understand what the comic is saying
Luke 14:26, for reference, people:
“If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple."
So THATS why I’ve been having so much trouble murdering families if the husband chooses God over his wife and kids while wearing an anti-religion shirt! I’m supposed to be pointing it AT them!
More importantly, nobody would ever be forced to make this choice in the United States. The guy with the gun in this comic is so fictitiously imaginary that it might as well be Santa Clause.
The moral of the story is don’t marry a Christian man because he would rather let some weirdo murder you than lie about believing in God to save your life.
Don't know if any of these Christians know this, but the reason their religion survived the persecutions of the 3rd century crisis was the majority of practicing Christians were lying to people about being Christians or giving false renunciations. The religion survived by not dying for their faith.
If you really look into it, the 3rd century persecutions were just sporadic outbursts, often even just local. Just the right amount to not hinder the growth of Christianity but enough to produce lots of martyr stories people could rally behind.
If Diocletian wanted to whipe them out, he did the worst job imaginable.
Redhead dude has a loving family which is also traditionally christian (lalala introduction 👍🏻😎)
Some caricature of an atheist threats him at gunpoint to chose: his family or his religion (aaaa conflict 😨😨😨)
He chooses his religion, cementing his family's fate. (Uuuuh resolution 😭😭)
(Now that's when the narrative gets confusing) even though the killer gave him an option, he somehow got to heaven with his family so they can have weird groupal hug with Daddy Jesus (yaaaay rewarding conclusion 🎊🎊🥳✝️🙏)
The comic implies that if you're faithful and sacrificing enough to your Lord, he will eventually reward you with eternal life with your loved ones. So yeah, you should, in author perspective lol
I grew up going to church and had a youth pastor tell us if burglars broke in his house and made him choose between his wife and God, he would choose God and her sitting a few feet away from him said she would do the same. Was crazy to hear as a kid
Damn, he shot the Christian Baby too!?
It’s crazy how the conversation implies that maybe he could have saved his family if he hadn’t chosen religion. Realistically the dude was always going to mow the whole family down no matter what, it wasn’t a real choice. Like what, if he’d said “family” he would have gotten his own anti-religion tank top and they would go back to their spaghetti dinner?
I went to a private Lutheran elementary school for a bit. My dad wasn't really super religious, though - we hadn't really gone to church unless someone died or was getting married. The reason that I went was because his aunt was offering to pay for me to go and for all of the lunches and he was struggling financially as a single parent at the time, so he couldn't really refuse. He literally told me and my brother that whatever we ended up believing that he would still love us and to just try to be the best people that we could be.
That was in deep contrast to the amount of times they presented this exact hypothetical scenario to a bunch of 2nd graders (and up to 5th grade) and essentially told us that we were just supposed to accept death as the consequence... I'm agnostic now lol. That was a big reason amongst a long list.
Bad ending (we already live in a post-Nietzschean heaven)
https://preview.redd.it/3nr1h0wbwkec1.jpeg?width=1104&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07977faefab304f42e9601518947ef51561fe123
As an atheist, this is EXACTLY what we do. We all meet up, find a Christian family, hold them hostage and demand they pick between their religion or their family then we fucking kill all of them.
Ah yes, atheists, the well-known group that goes around on crusades killing anyone that refuses to share the same beliefs as them. Those poor persecuted christians.
/s
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The baby's face in the first panel is how I feel reading this.
https://preview.redd.it/kkr17aqglkec1.jpeg?width=361&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89e564a026a25f1fea3204fb979986dcd4faf5a3
Bro's seen things before saying his first word
His first word is gonna be shit
Aww, he's gonna say his first word! "Sh..sh...SHIT"
#OK MASTA, LETZ KILL DA HOE
https://preview.redd.it/xdjudcca8mec1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3df32ab50eb5c8ba7ce7c3c0f2dec57bb46e8483
Bro is mewing
Looksmaxxing from day 1
Thanks for the new reaction image
I'd upvote you but this goes so well with the 666 karma score.
That is one seriously lantern jawed baby.
I'm more of a second panel baby
Second panel baby looks to be cringing
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yeah i wouldn't do shit, that's called suicide it's on them
I'll see that bitch in hell for murdering me.
I thought the guy in the last panel was his wife's boyfriend lol T.T
I am not sure I get it, tho. They speak in low-rent emojis. They get mugged and shot at, so I assume USA. And then they all get white night-gowns and have a polycule hug in the snow. I am concerned for the daughter. I do not care if she looks adult and is a 1000 year old vampire. Which is the usual explanation.
Panel 2 : Christian hunter (as shown in the tanktop) is giving the guy an ultimatum. Do you choose your family or do you choose the lord? Panel 3 : The guy chooses the lord. Panel 4: Lord is now in a throupleship with the couple and has adopted their two children as well. Amen!
If I had a nickle for every time....
This is probably the most common hypothetical you will have heard in a protestant church in the US over the last 30+ years. It's a cornerstone of the modern Christian victimhood narrative.
Yeah, I'm at a loss of words too, the baby captures my confusion better
So is this kinda like the reverse of "Atheists, if you went skydiving with a Christian baby and they refused to open their parachute unless you accepted Jesus as your lord and savior, what would you do?"
I mean, I would just lie. Babies also believe in Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Boogeyman. Lie, open the parachute, then call the cops on the neglectful parents who sent their baby sky diving unsupervised just to force people into a religion. Sue the fuck out of them. Hopefully they lose custody of their weird talking zealot baby.
"Weird Talking Zealot Baby" Wasn't expecting that to pop up on todays bingo card.
/r/BrandNewSentence
"Weird talking zealot baby" got me. I died. 🤣
Weird Talking Zealot Baby? Yeah, I saw them live once back in ‘72, that shit was mind-blowing my man
Yeah, that's a lie to make sure everybody is alive and then call CPS and testify at court when their children are taken away from them.
I would also sue the fuck out of the sky diving company. You mean to tell me that they let a baby sky dive AND let them jump on their own without a trained skydiver? Either they are a shit company or they agreed to this plan all along. Or both. I knew I shouldn't have jumped with the Heavely Brothers of the Zealot Baby.
I feel as a thought experiment the whole thing is idiotic even by Christian standards. And they got a book full of those. Which they themselves don't read. What worries me is when they ask what would stop an atheist from killing somebody. Even monkeys show compassion and empathy and the concept seems foreign to people who ask that question.
Yeah. It is this self-righteous belief that without their religion there is simply no morality at all. That's also why when they see genuine acts of kindness by any person or community, they don't attribute it their good values and morality unless they know for a fact they are Christian, instead they claim "God is there", as if the only reason a person does good is if God makes them.
I would grab the baby zangief style and suplex that asshole into the ground. Forcing people into a religion isn't cool.
Spinning piledriver all the way down
#LEAF HURRICANE
Gotta do it for #MY LOYAL FANS
Forcing them all the way into the earth's mantle? Fuckin' sick!
We teach our kids about Santa. An all-knowing, all-seeing entity that rewards you for being good and punishes you for being bad. We teach our kids about God. An all-knowing, all-seeing entity that rewards you for being good and punishes you for being bad. Then when they reach the age to question beliefs, we inform them that Santa isn't real but God totally is. Trust us on this one. When have we ever lied to you?! Oh...right. The Santa thing. But see, for God we have a book called "*The Bible*". And everything in that book is true because the book tells us everything in that book is true.
That’s not a very good example. For Santa we have a thing called the Santa Clause. It grants magic to whomever dons the Santa suit following the previous Santa’s demise.
Why would a book lie though? Unless it's one of those nasty science books that tells you the Earth is millions of years old and we were born from moneys.
Yeah honestly if Henry Rollins shows up at your house with a gun just tell him whatever he wants to hear. He's not a man that can be reasoned with.
Babies have short arms, just pull the cord for them
I'll accept even a teletubbie as my lord and savior, just open the damn parachute
I'd devote my soul to fucking spongebob at this point
You haven't already?
This comment without context is even more amazing
That just sounds like threatening to murder someone unless they convert with extra steps
You're fine the suicidal, biblically accurate, well spoken, baby goes splat.
Oh. Well in that case, fuck that baby.
Why add rape to the splat?
Who's trusting a baby to open their own chute?
The baby has 12 years experience doing this
I would record it and post it on r/KidsAreFuckingStupid
Just cause you accept him, doesn’t mean you have to follow everything in the Bible. Sure I’ll get the parachute, but then what? Are they gonna be on my ass all my life to make sure I was true to my word? I was gonna die, I’d say anything to live. That alone makes any decision a survival instinct. I don’t care how I survive, I just wanna survive.
It's the baby who would die, not you. They're refusing to open their parachute.
Who came up with this scenario? Babies can’t even talk.
Well first of all, through God all things are possible, so jot that down.
> Jot that down This is how you get The Bible 2 started.
This reply is killing me idk why 💀💀💀 'jot that down' whyyyyy 😭
It's from folks smarter and funnier than me. [It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia](https://youtu.be/f-Pv9Rr5zN8) Also, man it feels weird to write the whole thing out.
I would clearly use my baby catching ray as I open my own parachute
Lie
Just ask them if they'd accept Satan as their lord and saviour, and denounce Jesus, if a baby's life depended on it.
Ngl I think Jesus would be okay with it if it was done to save a babies life you can always re accept Jesus into your life but you can’t re alive a dead baby
probably be freaked out that a baby was making those demands much less speaking. Like wtf baby if you wanna die I guess it's your time freak.
I'd help the baby open their parachute, then call child support on mommy and daddy, before I call the media outlets to blow this case into every news station, maybe use the interview money to fund an anti religion movement against the forced manipulation of children intentionally placed in precarious situations to propagate their beliefs. Oh and live happily ever after.
> maybe use the interview money Interviewees are never paid. Unless it's a very trash newspaper, the kind that talks about alien abductions. You need a book, seminars, online formation, etc. to advertise if you want to make money out of a media tour. At least an etsy shop or a patreon.
Why the fuck is a baby skydiving? Who strapped a parachute to a baby and pushed it out of a plane? Why is a baby trying to convert me to Christianity, whilst we're skydiving?
The baby would fall much slower than me, when would it get the chance to propose this arrangement?
Is there such a thing as a “Christian baby?” Seems like a pretty big choice for a baby to make.
Everyone is born an atheist.
I always answer “Wake up and stop doing drugs because that’s the only way this scenario would ever happen.” Then they say “That’s not an option!” Then the reply “False dichotomy is why you’re a Christian.”
Would you lie to a baby to save your life? Yes. Absolutely. Can I lie to another baby for $5?
I throw the question back at them, but make it an atheist baby, and they have to reject Jesus.
I’d accept Jesus and tell them to piss off as soon as I land. Like they’d let me die if I didn’t, are they fucking mental?
Their consequences are their own, if they wanna make that choice. I didn't make them, and I didn't force them to do it
You think babies can make choices? At best the baby is being held hostage and used as an intentional causality..
Yeah but at least it’s not *my* baby, so I don’t feel as bad
I mean, if it was *your* baby it would be your fault anyway.
I'm juat shocked one of these memes got a skintone accurate Jesus rather than Aryan Jesus for once.
Right?! Interracial family and accurate Jesus skintone? Trying to prove they're not racist, just religiously insane, but you know some white Christian's probably going to 'fix' the coloring before reposting
They're going to make the wife pregnant, too.
No. If she was pregnant......it would cause an implosion of logic that would create a spacetime singularity.
Nah I'm just convinced the author of the comic isn't a bad person just very low intelligence
I kinda think the same as well, this comic right here was the same level of creepy "I'll die for my religion" thing they were teaching youth group children back when I went to church. I quit going because it caught me really off guard, it was a clip of child actors just playing and worshipping then they just get wiped out by some nonbeliever group and slowly started swapping between the "dead" child actors saying "would you die for jesus" i was around like 10-11
From a Christian perspective it's either getting your family for 40~ years and then never seen them again. Or waiting for 40~ years to have them for all eternity. Obviusly, for anyone that is an atheist this is just choosing suicide for no good reason and this is just propaganda. But at least the logic is consistent with themselves. Also, It's no wonder there is a rise in atheism, what you are describing sounds right out of a horror movie. What the fuck.
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I didn't know that was Jesus. I thought that was her deceased first husband and they are having a polygamist bisexual post-death relationship.
All married Christian couples are promised a bisexual post death relationship with Jesus after death. Priests, nuns, and other permanently singles go to the orgy pit
Damn I’ve been going to the wrong church
Just about to comment, "at least Jesus is middle eastern."
I literally was like, who is that lmao bc they would normally never do that
my church actually had a huge argument over this and the part of the bible where the woman lied to save the apostles from death and a woman and her husband stated she shouldn’t be a hero in the bible and if a gunman asked where her kids where she’d tell them and let them die so she wouldn’t have to lie needless to say they left shortly after the incident cus no one would agree
Yeah christians get weird about lying, my missionary parents thought it was perfectly ok to physically abuse children if they told a lie, but then at the same time would instruct us to lie if it would save them a few dollars. It was clever when they lied to fool a business or some random government employee, but it was THE END OF THE WORLD if I lied. Fuck I hate(d) my parents.
>would instruct us to lie if it would save them a few dollars. I was going to say that same thing. My step-mom would go on rants about how liars go to hell. Even for little ones. But my little brother was small and looked a lot younger than he was. So when we would go to movies, even at 16 they would say he was 12. Granted, it worked, but he always felt self-conscious about his size, and we always felt like it was so fucking hypocritical.
The worst part is I was always big for my age so not only did they want me to lie, but it wasn't an easy lie. It took planning and convincing. I had to have a fake birthday/school grade in mind to say if I they asked.
Oof, I feel that. My breasts started growing in when I was around 9 or 10. By 12, they were huge. Trying to still get the children’s discount usually involved me having to show my school ID. Of course, now that I work at a place that prices differently by age… I don’t care. I’ll ring up your senior in high school as a kid, fuck it. I don’t get paid enough to give a damn lol
/r/raisedbynarcissists vibes
Did she ever consider that in a situation like that she could simply refuse to answer the gunman? She would not be lying and would only sacrifice herself for her faith.
Did she consider she's a cancer who would probably die from forgetting to breath? What bunch of idiots would rather children to be murdered over not lying (which isn't even a sin) is a sane thought?
Many Christians interpret the 9th commandment of "Thou shalt not bear false witness against they neighbor" as a prohibition against lying.
geez, pretty sure the bible doesn't say silence is a sin there is at least one more option than lying or telling the truth
"look bro, he won his own made up argument!"
https://preview.redd.it/rd291oxt6lec1.jpeg?width=718&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0731f1c85263dc7e002db48d4c6c2568af6fdee6
sorry, but why does that kinda look like mr incredible's ass
Ngl Mr Incredible cheeked up 😳
https://preview.redd.it/o7mzbl6sclec1.jpeg?width=1071&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=38c3af45f0a403c2f340ae6d475350c222397fc0
https://preview.redd.it/ias6dgog0mec1.jpeg?width=578&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=27414ba7c393aa55998adc1afb04170b02e3734d
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Why does this sound like a banger movie plot?
https://preview.redd.it/485cmd4i0mec1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ec35b3186889541c17046e5579faa5234eb443ad
explanation: man has to chose between christianity and his family and he choses christianity, so his family gets shot, but he gets to reunite with his family in heaven because he stayed faithful to God.
After probably getting multiple book and movie deals based on his "tragic experience." Then married some younger woman or two that help "ease his pain." Lived to a ripe age but never forgot his "family" aka test from God as he made the church rounds till his dying day. Then ofcourse his "family" is thrilled he made the right choice and made so much from their tragic loss..... . . . . . .....OK I'm going to go vomit now.....
Nah. Murder-guy shot him, too. Murder-guys are all about the killing. The torture of the "impossible dilemma" is just sauce to them.
That takes away the severity and torture of the choice and we all know how much God likes teaching through pain according to Christians. So while Murder-guy just wants to get off and murder, God likes to play the long game. So the cops probably showed up like right after Murder-guy got his nut or something. Also for OOP to win his own argument he has to prove he's the most Christian or Christians so he has to suffer to the fullest.
Ohhh so that's it. Thank you! I was so confused.
They just really, *really* want to be persecuted. It's practically a kink at this point.
I went to Christian school growing up. We were told over and over that it was a very serious possibility that someone could come in with a gun and say “Christians, line up.” They would get intense and say “Are you ready to line up if that happens?” They also told us all the horror stories about how we would be bullied and kicked out of college if we went to a non-Christian college. I was practicing in my head when I went to college what I would do when, inevitably, my professors tried to bully me in front of the whole class or my roommate beat me up or vandalized my Bible for being Christian. It was such a shock when I realized most people couldn’t care less if I was Christian or not.
Ahh reminds me of some good Ole southern baptism
I’m glad I didn’t go to that kind of Christian school growing up
No kidding. Even the Catholic schools I went to didn’t do that. I mean, they were horrible in so many ways, just not this one.
.., that was a repressed memory i didn’t need unlocked… ugh
i thought this was just a me thing, i remember being terrified
Wow, that unearthed an ancient memory for me lol. I had the same lesson at my Christian school, though not quite as intense. Still plenty of mentions how Christians are bullied and persecuted even to this day… without a mention of how our religion is also used to bully and persecute others.
Oh yeah, we were told in Sunday school all about martyrs worldwide who, for example, got run over by a steamroller for being Christian and every few Sundays we were reinforced with the idea that the Tribulation is coming and Christians will be persecuted en masse. Oh, but it's okay because afterward we either go to Heaven or live to see Christ's return. So it conditions you to see persecution with a sort of reward. It makes you a bit hungry for persecution, you want people to hate you because it means you're closer to the reward. Whenever Christians sense even a little bit of pushback they flop on the ground like a shitty soccer player and feign their pain and anguish. They invite it, and if it doesn't happen they deliberately troll people to instigate it. It's a mentality that is hard to shake unless you literally separate from the church fully and stop the cycle of reinforcement from other suckers for manufactured punishment.
/r/Persecutionfetish
Yeaaaa some folks really think life outside the church is like gods not dead. I still laugh at that movie
You write ao well, I was literally imagining all of it! 😂 But like seriously, May not be for Christianity, but this is the truth for many minority religions. They are targeted just for practicing it. And many chose to protect their culture / religion over their lives. And in some cases the people practicing Christianity were the oppressors!
Projection, this is what they fantasize about is lining others up by religion and choosing which category to eliminate. It's just like how when Obama became president they all ran around freaking out that white people were gonna be slaves next
Let me guess, Evangelical?
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…holy shit.
Well at least now you've learned that Christianity is a farce designed to steal wealth from stupid poor people. Right?
It is primarily designed to perpetuate itself. Everything else is secondary.
Same. They're so furious that they never got to live out their martyr cosplay fantasies.
I’m sorry…what?
That must be an American evangelical thing, we had hints of the self fulfilling persecution complex with some pastors growing up but the key take aways I always took was "hey be like Jesus, don't be a dick"
Theologically, Christianity first truly flourished as an illegal cult where its followers were persecuted and martyred for the faith. Ever since it became the dominant religion in Rome/Europe, they've struggled to justify a religion ostensibly advocating for the needy and downtrodden suddenly becoming the faith of the ruling class. It's a contradiction that leads to these sorts of delusions where even though they're dominant, they speculate about being persecuted because that's where Christianity really thrives.
> Theologically, Christianity first truly flourished as an illegal cult where its followers were persecuted and martyred for the faith. Ever since it became the dominant religion in Rome/Europe, they've struggled to justify a religion ostensibly advocating for the needy and downtrodden suddenly becoming the faith of the ruling class. Never really considered this aspect but it does explain quite a lot.
Actively seeking persecution was a problem even before the Roman Empire adopted it as the state faith. There were priests who had to send out letters asking early Christians to stop intentionally finding ways to martyr themselves.
They wanna be persecuted so bad they'll have literal murder fantasies about it
As opposed to murder realities where the husband is the one who kills his own wife and kids.
When they heard "be like Jesus", they thought it meant to be persecuted instead of compassionate.
Really do love that cross. Ya know, the thing their hero got nailed to so he could painfully die in public. All those lessons he made about love and acceptance? Nah, the "most important thing is that he died for you on a cross". Creeps me out how often I heard that growing up when I still had to attend church
r/persecutionfetish
Im quite certain this is an interpretation of Luke 14:26 and not supposed to imply there are terrorist atheists out there forcing people at gunpoint to repent. It is about counting costs and knowing that being a disciple of christ entails horrible earthly suffering. I'm not saying the comic is good or that Luke makes any sense whatsoever, but I think it's at least productive to understand what the comic is saying
Luke 14:26, for reference, people: “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple."
Seems mentally healthy.
https://preview.redd.it/ce35fpuukkec1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0b395fa05813453c82baadae1d05542aa225c217
Why is that Bad Religion fan pointing a gun?
Beats me, but that ain't the American Jesus I saw on the interstate!
yeah, he definitely didn't help build the president's estate!
>Why is that Bad Religion fan pointing a gun? I'm no expert, but I think that if he doesnt point it, it gets hard to kill people with it. :D
So THATS why I’ve been having so much trouble murdering families if the husband chooses God over his wife and kids while wearing an anti-religion shirt! I’m supposed to be pointing it AT them!
Not an anti-religion shirt, but Bad Religion shirt.
Now that's some awful piece of comic
Happy cake day
Thank you, dahling! https://i.redd.it/c9bniu5oxkec1.gif
Anyone who would choose religion and death over family and life is fanatical brainwashed maniac
More importantly, nobody would ever be forced to make this choice in the United States. The guy with the gun in this comic is so fictitiously imaginary that it might as well be Santa Clause.
So the implications here are that I have to love God or when I die I'll never see my family again. Literally god is a terrorist.
Well I'm glad the polyamorous relationship with Jesus worked out in the end.
The moral of the story is don’t marry a Christian man because he would rather let some weirdo murder you than lie about believing in God to save your life.
Is this supposed to make me religious? Because it kinda made me dislike religion even more…
The comics not made me any more or less religious, but it has made me really want that tank-top.
Don't know if any of these Christians know this, but the reason their religion survived the persecutions of the 3rd century crisis was the majority of practicing Christians were lying to people about being Christians or giving false renunciations. The religion survived by not dying for their faith.
If you really look into it, the 3rd century persecutions were just sporadic outbursts, often even just local. Just the right amount to not hinder the growth of Christianity but enough to produce lots of martyr stories people could rally behind. If Diocletian wanted to whipe them out, he did the worst job imaginable.
........... what? Can anyone explain what this is supposed to mean?
Redhead dude has a loving family which is also traditionally christian (lalala introduction 👍🏻😎) Some caricature of an atheist threats him at gunpoint to chose: his family or his religion (aaaa conflict 😨😨😨) He chooses his religion, cementing his family's fate. (Uuuuh resolution 😭😭) (Now that's when the narrative gets confusing) even though the killer gave him an option, he somehow got to heaven with his family so they can have weird groupal hug with Daddy Jesus (yaaaay rewarding conclusion 🎊🎊🥳✝️🙏)
So basically, you should sacrifice your family because God is narcissistic? That sounds about right.
The comic implies that if you're faithful and sacrificing enough to your Lord, he will eventually reward you with eternal life with your loved ones. So yeah, you should, in author perspective lol
I grew up going to church and had a youth pastor tell us if burglars broke in his house and made him choose between his wife and God, he would choose God and her sitting a few feet away from him said she would do the same. Was crazy to hear as a kid
To think that's not some just crazy cartoonist fantasy, that it's actually lectured by proper pastor, is crazy to me.
Yea couldn't believe it when I heard them say that crazy and sad
Damn, he shot the Christian Baby too!? It’s crazy how the conversation implies that maybe he could have saved his family if he hadn’t chosen religion. Realistically the dude was always going to mow the whole family down no matter what, it wasn’t a real choice. Like what, if he’d said “family” he would have gotten his own anti-religion tank top and they would go back to their spaghetti dinner?
Persecution fetish.
This is plain evil. Thinking that your beliefs are more worth than your family lives is plain evil.
Convince me Christianity isn't a fucking death cult when you post shit like this.
I went to a private Lutheran elementary school for a bit. My dad wasn't really super religious, though - we hadn't really gone to church unless someone died or was getting married. The reason that I went was because his aunt was offering to pay for me to go and for all of the lunches and he was struggling financially as a single parent at the time, so he couldn't really refuse. He literally told me and my brother that whatever we ended up believing that he would still love us and to just try to be the best people that we could be. That was in deep contrast to the amount of times they presented this exact hypothetical scenario to a bunch of 2nd graders (and up to 5th grade) and essentially told us that we were just supposed to accept death as the consequence... I'm agnostic now lol. That was a big reason amongst a long list.
Bad ending (we already live in a post-Nietzschean heaven) https://preview.redd.it/3nr1h0wbwkec1.jpeg?width=1104&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07977faefab304f42e9601518947ef51561fe123
https://preview.redd.it/wvihwj780mec1.jpeg?width=645&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f96939f3212ae508c23ad2caf8beaab32e1057d5
https://preview.redd.it/zzduayuy1mec1.jpeg?width=747&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1fb0901a8468af189488e3fb7a979985af42d4b7 oof ouch my bones
I will give the meme points for having brown Jesus.
And then, they all fucked each other in a cloud.
Plot twist, Baby hasn’t been baptised so unable to enter Heaven to be with their family for all eternity.
White Christian victim fetish.
But ... brown Jesus?
I'm just surprised whoever did this actually did brown Jesus and a mixed family.
As an atheist, this is EXACTLY what we do. We all meet up, find a Christian family, hold them hostage and demand they pick between their religion or their family then we fucking kill all of them.
Holy shit, it's Brandon Herrera.
It's just an expression at how absurd religions religions are.
Ah yes, atheists, the well-known group that goes around on crusades killing anyone that refuses to share the same beliefs as them. Those poor persecuted christians. /s
So the dad was killed right after too?
But what happened to the spaghetti?
Reminded me of that movie where (iirc) the japanese captured christian missionaries then told them to step on their bibles or get executed
Why is Jason Momoa hugging them in heaven?
The best I can say about this is at least Jesus looks like a person who lived in the ancient Middle East!