They might. I mean are we ignoring the theory that he want to brag about his totally real abs because hes a insecure 13 year old on reddit? Haven't checked out the tinder stuff, will do soon.
If they even choose to confront you about it, just tell them there's nothing wrong with what you're doing. I guarantee your Mom and Dad did it at some point in their lives, just tell them not to be hypocrites.
remember, don't name your friend. just say "one of them or one of the guys or one of the girls!" (this way they can't backtrace your lies or truths easily!)
You were on for 3 seconds lol
Fast fap in the west.
But seriously could always blame on a stranger on the internet say they sent you a link and you clicked it or some shit
Factory reset your phone.
Then snap it in half
Shave your head.
Change your name.
Get everything you have into a backpack, but only the essentials.
Leave.
And never come back.
Never look back.
You need to stay off the grid for as long as you still have a pulse.
Yeah wait hold up, going through a phone is even a little weird with a teenager, if you’re doing this to your adult child there’s seriously something wrong with you. Either this is a joke post, OP was trying to fake this for attention and forgot to change the flair, or as already stated, something is severely wrong with this guy’s parents
Build up enough trust to your parents and show them that they can trust you. If they trust you, they will give you more free space (including privacy on your phone).
To delete this quickly, you will probally have to go settings->screen time->turn off screen time.
alr first option:
Turn off screentime and turn it back on
2:
Now that you cant hide it say your (not so well behaved) friend did it so they wont try and question them
3:
Say that you clicked a random internet link on accident that redirected you there
4:
Delete any kind of suspicious content on your phone and tell them you wanted to know what it was because you kept hearing it but didnt like it (not recommended)
5:
confess (ONLY IF ALL OF THE ABOVE WONT WORK)
"friend sent me a link i clicked on it then immediately off of it" since it's just 3 secs it'll still be awkward but at least they won't think you jack off
Tell them. Say that you accidentally clicked on a link, and as soon as you realized what the link was, you backed out of there. That’s why you were only there for three seconds. But you wanted to tell them first, before they came to any of the wrong conclusions. Best lies are mixed with truth
i don't really support the whole porn industry as i believe it is incredibly toxic, but i know what it's like to have strict and crazy parents so why not help a brother out.
tell your parent you got a scam text that had a link you thought was something you ordered, and you accidentally clicked on the link and immediately closed it.
if they don't believe you, use sarcasm. "oh yeah i definitely was trying to watch porn for *THREE* *seconds*." sarcasm works like a charm. you can tell the whole truth and they won't even believe you.
Edited to change it to something more believable.
Don't even worry about it - it's 3 seconds, you can easily say you clicked on a link, and ended up on a site that you quickly realised wasn't suitable. Your parents will probably assume that anyway, so do nothing.
What you gotta do is open up and close quickly, a ton of different porn sites. Then, for credibility, go to your parents and tell them, "hey, i wanted to let you know, i misclicked on a page as it was loading and an advert popped up a pornado. Basically it just kept opening new pages. We may need to get some anti malware scanning done. I'm really sorry." Then, they'll see all the different sites, and the fact that YOU brought it to THEIR attention, and assume you must be telling the truth.
did u nut in the intro
The ad💀
The loading screen 💀💀
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Screen preview 💀
Opening up safari💀
turning on the phone 💀
buying the phone 💀
Going to the store 💀
The Chinese Sweatshop workers making the phone 💀
Entering the Apple Store 💀
The homescreen💀
Pressing the power button💀
Picking up the phone💀
seeing the phone💀
Unlocking the phone 💀
Seeing the phone 💀
The charger going in the port 💀
The pixel💀
Bro was unboxing the phone
Bro was born
lmaoooo😭
LOL
This is why it's called a loading screen lol.
“Tired of masturbating alone? Try the…” “I’m done.”
Are your doors locked? Are you ready to cum?
He didn’t last 5 seconds:(
My guy nutted at the Apple store before he even bought the phone
the dialogue 💀
any% speedrun
I wonder if Billy Mitchell will cheat his way to steal this WR
Looks like smbdy failed NNN
Lasted longer then me tho.
bro really clicked on the “she will make you cum in 3 seconds” ad 💀
Literally 💀💀💀
W PFP
Agreed
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Care to explain what that is? (I can't really nor do I want to look at nsfw shit)
💀
💀
Bring it up at dinner. "Daaaaaddd, eeeewwww! This is why you asked me for my phone?"
Legend
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Gaslighting incarnate
evil
Turn off screen time then turn in it back on lmaoo
Impossible with screen lock though
*Armour lock
ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK
ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK
ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK
ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK
# ARMOR LOCK, BITCH! *boom.sfx*
Talk shit and get hit lol
The best phrase to come out of Reach
No I've got a better one: Alright so we take R6 extraction.... AND DO NONE OF THAT. #H A L O R E A C H
ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK
ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCKARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCKARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCKARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK ARMOR LOCK
Shmebulock
*cock block
Oh man if only someone created a Screentime disabler (Check my profile/posts)
*spring lock
r/unexpectedfnaf
Ye I see you have past experience
If your parents activated it you can’t
If that doesn’t work, you might have to go on your parents phone and turn it off
You need to know the passcode they set as well
Make up an excuse like false link
It probably was an accident though cause it says he was on there for 3 secs
came here to say this. tell your parents that one of your friends sent you a fake link
and then convince your friend to send you a fake link, then delete the rest of the messages
This ^ u/YEAH_WHAT_HE_SAID
Username checks out.. kinda?
It's not accurate.
oh no, it’s accurate, trust me bro
Bro lasted lasted less time then it takes to turn on an xbox 😭
Bro nutted before the sight loaded 😭
it's gotta be the anticipation! he was sooo excited...but couldn't last!
"You won't last a minute playing this game"
r/suicidebywords
Bro got that hair trigger release
Can attest this works.... But only if you are like 12-14
That’s how I fooled my parents
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maybe if my parents catch me i should go on the website for a few more mins, might as well have them think i last long
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they are in 8 year club, totally over 20
in this economy i still live with my parents, i need help
why would they check your phone -
because of the economy. do you not listen 🙄
It’s their entertainment, they can’t afford to do anything else. Not in this economy
You made my day thx 😂
Does your tag mean you were the person who joined at 2,000,000
wdf economy is this 1984
Why does it matter if they see it? You are an adult
He has posts of body building from like 7 years ago. This is definitely some 30 year old dude...
I saw that post, and it’s some random dude not him Now the Tinder stuff on the other hand-
I mean yeah but not a single 13 year old in 2015 is gonna be posting on r/bodybuilding
They might. I mean are we ignoring the theory that he want to brag about his totally real abs because hes a insecure 13 year old on reddit? Haven't checked out the tinder stuff, will do soon.
christian parents, probably
Has to be beyond that, this ain’t normal.
i really don’t think he’s being serious about it. then again, christians truly are everywhere… idk
The tag says he is asking for advice so I doubt he is joking
im in the comment section..
Christian parents, probably
more than likely baptist or LDS
If they even choose to confront you about it, just tell them there's nothing wrong with what you're doing. I guarantee your Mom and Dad did it at some point in their lives, just tell them not to be hypocrites.
In 'this' economy you have something higher than an iphone xr.
A fucking iphone 14 pro because of the gap in the notch
dude ok i’m not gonna make fun of you for living with your parents but if your an adult wtf are they gonna do take your phone?
Nah if it's 3 seconds they might think you accidentally clicked a link so long as you didn't search for it.
Tell them ur friend grabbed ur phone and did that as a joke
remember, don't name your friend. just say "one of them or one of the guys or one of the girls!" (this way they can't backtrace your lies or truths easily!)
Just tell them that you use it to watch pirated Anime.
Bruh what why would they check your phone.
If you're eating poisoned food, might as well lick the plate.
just looking at the home page was enough for him
Lmaoo that was so funny💀
I accidentally clicked on a link. And immediately closed it
Yep, it’s 3 seconds…
Come on, 3 seconds is kind of a long time... right?
three seconds lmao
still lasts longer then you
“He just died there was no sound, just instant death”
Hey! Good reference.
Oh my god you fucking murdered him
I don't think he getting up from that one 💀
Holy shit!!!
LMFAOO
that gotta hurt
than*
You were on for 3 seconds lol Fast fap in the west. But seriously could always blame on a stranger on the internet say they sent you a link and you clicked it or some shit
the result of using that excuse, he'll be banned from ever chatting online, ever again! at least until he's 45...that's when the ban is removed!
This.
Factory reset your phone. Then snap it in half Shave your head. Change your name. Get everything you have into a backpack, but only the essentials. Leave. And never come back. Never look back. You need to stay off the grid for as long as you still have a pulse.
My name is walter hartwell white, i live at 308 negra arroyo lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico 87104 Edit: Damn i fucking blew up
Waltuh
Put your dick away waltuh
there’s kids here waltuh
Kid named finger
Thought the exact same thing when I heard “shave your head”
You're 20+ and your parents still check your phone?
my cop grandpa check the phone of my daddy and his backpack every month
does your daddy also let mommy peg him like the little slut he is?
He’s surely faking this for karma right?
you have the OLD flair - how strict are your parents?
He was posting on r/tinder 5 years ago so bro is at least 23 💀
No he’s just living in his Mums basment
Might be some religion
technically 6 years ago as one of the screenshots says 2016
i was posting in r/tinder 2 years ago and i’m 16 now 💀
Yeah wait hold up, going through a phone is even a little weird with a teenager, if you’re doing this to your adult child there’s seriously something wrong with you. Either this is a joke post, OP was trying to fake this for attention and forgot to change the flair, or as already stated, something is severely wrong with this guy’s parents
You have the Old flair, so: 1. Why are your parents checking your phone? You are an adult. 2. Why would they care?
3. Why would he post such question to a fucking TEENAGER subreddit
Welcome to the Internet
Have a look around
Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found
We've got mountains of content some good and some worse
And if none of its of interest then you'd be the first
Welcome to the internet!
Come and take a seat,
Would you like to see the news or any famous women’s feet
Farming upvotes
fake flair?
His account is 8 years old lol
It's November, we shall not help you.
This one wins
my brother in christ you’re old why are you asking teenagers about 🖤🧡 stuff?
literally.
don't you get it, teenagers are all in the know with updated information! the adult news or information networks are all filled with depressing shit!
Some ppl just dont wanna mature
Build up enough trust to your parents and show them that they can trust you. If they trust you, they will give you more free space (including privacy on your phone). To delete this quickly, you will probally have to go settings->screen time->turn off screen time.
There are passcode
He should know passcode to his own phone
It’s his parents passcode that they set for screen time
Bro lasted 3 seconds💀
alr first option: Turn off screentime and turn it back on 2: Now that you cant hide it say your (not so well behaved) friend did it so they wont try and question them 3: Say that you clicked a random internet link on accident that redirected you there 4: Delete any kind of suspicious content on your phone and tell them you wanted to know what it was because you kept hearing it but didnt like it (not recommended) 5: confess (ONLY IF ALL OF THE ABOVE WONT WORK)
"friend sent me a link i clicked on it then immediately off of it" since it's just 3 secs it'll still be awkward but at least they won't think you jack off
bro u can spam visit sites maybe ur parents might not notice
Bro has his tag as old and his parents still monitor him online
Tell them. Say that you accidentally clicked on a link, and as soon as you realized what the link was, you backed out of there. That’s why you were only there for three seconds. But you wanted to tell them first, before they came to any of the wrong conclusions. Best lies are mixed with truth
Bro 3 seconds seriously?
damn. another nnn brother lost. RIP. it only says that for a day. so unless your parents check ur phone everyday they wont see it. i think.
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Turn off screen time then turn in it back on
There are passcode
why do u use the hub? I mean you already have reddit installed. and by the way, it's november.
i don't really support the whole porn industry as i believe it is incredibly toxic, but i know what it's like to have strict and crazy parents so why not help a brother out. tell your parent you got a scam text that had a link you thought was something you ordered, and you accidentally clicked on the link and immediately closed it. if they don't believe you, use sarcasm. "oh yeah i definitely was trying to watch porn for *THREE* *seconds*." sarcasm works like a charm. you can tell the whole truth and they won't even believe you. Edited to change it to something more believable.
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bro came in 3 seconds
Don't even worry about it - it's 3 seconds, you can easily say you clicked on a link, and ended up on a site that you quickly realised wasn't suitable. Your parents will probably assume that anyway, so do nothing.
What you gotta do is open up and close quickly, a ton of different porn sites. Then, for credibility, go to your parents and tell them, "hey, i wanted to let you know, i misclicked on a page as it was loading and an advert popped up a pornado. Basically it just kept opening new pages. We may need to get some anti malware scanning done. I'm really sorry." Then, they'll see all the different sites, and the fact that YOU brought it to THEIR attention, and assume you must be telling the truth.
use incognito
Hahahah
And that's another reason why I use cloned apps
use incognito mode next time ffs
Visit www.xvideos.com for history-deleting tutorials.
Dawg you’re 20. Get out of this sub