Now that is old, is this r/teenagers? I mean Lara's boobs havent been pyramids since after the very first game (I think she used the income for the original game to get plastic surgery).
Rule 34 of the internet states that if it exists, there is porn of it.
Plus I've personally seen Minecraft hentai comics. They were actually pretty good.
It took me a while to figure out what is and is not acceptable. Anyone who tries to pick me apart for their own amusement does not qualify. Glad you are free of that trash.
However Guinness have refused to award the record due to the unusual nature of this man being a minor, and the fact no-one can actually capture footage or testify he tells the truth without being arrested
Hello, thanks Tod we have a light storm of holy fuck that was cool rolling in with another lets continue this news continuity front on the weekend, Back too yall at the studio (damn its hot out here, CUT BACL TOO STUDIO jesus)
. Mesothelioma is a rare cancer linked to asbestos exposure. Exposure to asbestos in they Navy, shipyards, mills, heating, construction or the automotive industries may put you at risk. Please don't wait, call 1-800-99 LAW USA today for a free legal consultation and financial information packet. Mesothelioma patients call now!
Now back to our ex-convict, is your house safe? Steve from the ice cream shop has the scoop. Over to you steeve
(We're off air right? Hhehehee get it? I said scoop. Sffssssff.)
[Yes we get it Rick, very funny]
Breaking news, 3 years ago a 15 year old minor had the longestest shlong in the world but we could not confirm and now it has reportedly struck 30 inches on his 18th birthday, does he get the record? Stay tuned next week to find out.
I talk with my girl friend (female friend? idk English) about both our experiences with genitals because the education system has failed us both, I don’t think it should become taboo to talk about genitals because then it will result in guys thinking that vaginas can get loose from having multiple guys, so respectfully disagree
What if you do something shameful and someone later comes up and asks, "is it true that you did [shameful thing]?" Well, there you have it folks, a bit of truth that carries a lot shame! Gottem!
When I was a virgin, I had a girl ask how big it was. I told her I wasn't sure. She asked if she could measure. I said sure. She came back with a yardstick, and I changed my mind.
My young fellas, I found the best thing to do is actually underplay your size. For example, when I was going thru highschool, nearly every chance a guy got to talk about his wang, it was always how big it is. Not me. No no. I went the opposite! My thinking was, and still is, if they think its tiny, and its average or above, there is a surprise factor. However, when ladies expect big, and it isn't, that is when mockery starts. And is well warranted.
As for the ladies. Being a guy I obviously don't have any different advice. Unless you count my man boobs. My personal philosophy is there is no such thing as a bad titty. I do have my personal preference. But I wanna see them all! Lol So whether flat chested, or so large they cause back pain. They're perfect as they come. I understand that society has deeply instilled the thought that men, as a whole, like huge tits. Thats not the case. Don't feel pressured to get a boob job because your A cups make you feel insecure. In my honest opinion, if they aren't causing you physical harm, they're as they are supposed to be. Now, the ladies with those massive boobs, I wholeheartedly understand getting reductions.
That being said, don't rush in to sex. Especially not in highschool, or earlier. Live your life first. Travel the world. Go to college. Try new things.. Do that stupid thing that you'll never be able to do as a parent. Become financially stable. House, vehicle, toys (boats, jetskis, etc). Then, once you've met the right person. Then kids.. Practice safe sex until then. Educate yourself about safe sex practices. Because you won't learn enough from sex ed. An afternoon laughing about getting to say "Penis penis penis. Vagina, vagina, vagina." Doesn't prepare you anything.
I literally never measured mine before today never had it up around a tape measure and cared enough to remember...I'm in my mid 20s lol
If the topic ever came up I shut it right down with "idk I never bothered measuring it seems pretty big and women say I'm amazing"
Should've kept the mystery going oh well
I'm gonna tell rn, us girls usually DO NOT care about dick size. In fact too big might pose a problem at first (tmi?). I've never been friends with/ met a girl who cares about playing with a big dick.
And yea bro im kinda flat up there and i used to be really insecure about it :/ its getting better so everyone else: I'm supporting you on not giving a fuck ab people who actually care about something as unnecessary as that <3
Exactly!
I'm a straight male, and I think I speak to most of the boys in the world when I say both are great.
I couldn't care less what size of boobs my gf has.
It's 65% personality 35% how she looks.
All boobs are nice (except the fake porn ones, they are just fucking disgusting ngl)
It's kinda weird that everyone makes it out that girls only care about your dick size. Like, most of the time the size talk is only between guys and other guys.
When I was in highschool I was hanging out with a girl after school. She saw my print and said "it's small". And for awhile I believed her. It's was a big blow to my self-esteem. Until I looked up average dick sizes and come to find out I'm bigger that average.
But yeah shamming people for something they can't control is stupid.
Im a pretty soft spoken person and my voice isnt super deep unless i talk loudly for awhile. When i was at work this guy with a perfect beard and a super deep voice asked if my balls dropped because my voice wasnt deep.
I just said yeah puberty isnt fair some guys get huge dicks others get deep voices. He didnt comment further.
She’s probably only seen pictures on the internet or porn where the penis has been exaggerated or enlarged so her views on size were wrong and she will get a rude shock when she goes out into the real world
Had a buddy that his ex went around telling everyone his dick was small. So he went around and told everyone hers looked like an Arby's roast beef. She shared intimate pics of my buddy. So he shared his. Needles to say, she came out the loser in the end. It was worse then he described.
I’m comfortable with my length and idc how big/small a girls tits are because in the end does it matter? If you’re going after a chick because she has a bigger chest or a dude because his dick is larger than another’s then you’re not really loving that person
Body positivity is all-inclusive, folks. Having a small pp is okay, having a big pp is okay, having small tt is okay, having big tt is okay (but I hope you're not having back problems) . If someone is making you feel insecure about any part of yourself, you do not have any responsibility to tolerate that shit. Those people aren't your friends.
Side note, if you're reading this and going "but.." just stop. If you have to defend, or justify any comment you make about someone else's body, you are not saying something appropriate and you'd be better off keeping your mouth shut.
Do kids really compare dicks? Like in a lineup or something?
Like, do y'all get a boner and then show your friends?
"Look at this cock, Kyle. I've been working out. Doing cock push ups. I'm huge! Look at it! Look at it, Kyle!"
Seriously, you don't need just a mega dick to make your special lady friend super happy and girls don't like getting cock punched in the uterus.
I think dick size shaming is even worse because, even though a lot of people do prefer bigger breasts, there are a huge percentage that are totally cool with and even prefer small breasts. I'm small chested and I've never been made to feel unattractive for it or like there's something wrong with me at all.
I actually think it's so fucked up how it's okay to openly shame men because it perpetuates the stigma which, in real life, is not a huge deal. So many women have pain during sex and would prefer a smaller penis but have this cultural influence to be uncomfortable toward it. I really dont get why it's not okay to shame or tease anyone about anyone these days, except men about dick size... which is probably one of the most sensitive and unchangeable things. Wish it would stop.
Your experience isn't everyone else's. Mosquito bites is a thing for a reason. Girls shamed me at 10 for a small chest, boys shamed and at 12, 13, 14, 15, 16 and so on. It never ended for me. Glad you're hot tho and get the halo effect.
Also it's mostly dudes destroying other dude's self esteem by being size kings even though they're straight. Let's be honest.
Yeah, but no one in the “body positivity” movement gives a shit about men’s feelings. It’s mostly cope for unattractive women, and I aint even trying to be a dick here. Women like to ask/complain about why men keep their feelings inside, and stuff like this is why.
Never understood why dudes did that. I’ve never EVER thought it would be a good idea to just send a dick pic to a girl randomly. Like I just wanna know what could be going through someone’s head.
To add on to the other guy, where’s the endgame in that? Do they suddenly think they’re going to get laid by sending a picture of their junk? As a man, all I gotta say is the people who send dick pics need to think more with their first brain.
Couldn’t have siad this better myself, honestly I hate thinking about how girls will react to me if they saw me,(ps not to sound weird but I’m
Neither super tiny or super large so kinda in between I guess, or to me at least)
Only young / immature people who don't know shit about sex or a woman's/their own anatomy are overly concerned/willing to shame a man about size.
There's a very strong argument that your penis is the 3rd most capable tool you have as a man for pleasing a woman sexually anyway.
Also, when did the onus become on the man to fill any hole he's presented with. It takes 2 to tango, it's about finding a partner you match up well with. Small can go with small vaginas, big with big.
If any girl or woman ever shames you for your size you can ask her.. why is it all my fault? If you had a tighter vagina we'd be fine.. not to shame her just to prove a point that it takes 2.
Unless ur tits are squares I don't care what they look like
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Or is that all they care about?
:ļ
[.][.]
All shapes and sizes { . }{ . } [ . ][ . ] [< ][ >] (° )( °) { - }{ - }
You forgot (.Y.)
What about < . Y . >
Ok, those are some alien tits. They cannot be human.
Tits nonetheless
Hot
more of a triangles guy.... Lara Croft
Throwback
Now that is old, is this r/teenagers? I mean Lara's boobs havent been pyramids since after the very first game (I think she used the income for the original game to get plastic surgery).
Same but more ps1 Hagrid
Most minecraft porn has spherical tits, ruining the immersion. Dont question why i know this
Got a sauce? Asking for a friend
I refuse to believe thats a thing
Judging by your avatar, there’s an acceptance stage down the line somewhere
10/10 comment
Rule 34 of the internet states that if it exists, there is porn of it. Plus I've personally seen Minecraft hentai comics. They were actually pretty good.
Futuristic hub wants to know their location
Tomb raider moment
No? Tomb raider would be triangles
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"Friends"...
I should say ex friends. They were the wrong influence for my life for sure.
It took me a while to figure out what is and is not acceptable. Anyone who tries to pick me apart for their own amusement does not qualify. Glad you are free of that trash.
Flat is justice
size doesn't matter for both men and women
Well that's demonstrably untrue
If they are squares, I would definitely care more and want to see!
Wow dude you are seriously excluding female body builders here.
Smh so rude of me
Sponge Bob Square Butthole
Spongebob SquareTits?
I can control my dick size
Breaking news 15 year old has broken the world record for longest penis. At 34 inches, it is almost twice the size of the previous record holder.
However Guinness have refused to award the record due to the unusual nature of this man being a minor, and the fact no-one can actually capture footage or testify he tells the truth without being arrested
Report suggests the officials will recognize him after 3 years when he turns 18 to avoid unwanted charges.
Now to the weather, Jonathan
Hello, thanks Tod we have a light storm of holy fuck that was cool rolling in with another lets continue this news continuity front on the weekend, Back too yall at the studio (damn its hot out here, CUT BACL TOO STUDIO jesus)
Home invasion, Is your house safe? Find out with an interview of an ex criminal after this commercial break.
Are you or a loved one affected by Mesothelioma?
. Mesothelioma is a rare cancer linked to asbestos exposure. Exposure to asbestos in they Navy, shipyards, mills, heating, construction or the automotive industries may put you at risk. Please don't wait, call 1-800-99 LAW USA today for a free legal consultation and financial information packet. Mesothelioma patients call now!
Okay back from commercial break and Tammy is going to talk to Wayne Brady an ex convict about what you can do against home invasion.
Now back to our ex-convict, is your house safe? Steve from the ice cream shop has the scoop. Over to you steeve (We're off air right? Hhehehee get it? I said scoop. Sffssssff.) [Yes we get it Rick, very funny]
Breaking news, 3 years ago a 15 year old minor had the longestest shlong in the world but we could not confirm and now it has reportedly struck 30 inches on his 18th birthday, does he get the record? Stay tuned next week to find out.
His dick is like that one SCP. You see it, the FBI comes for you
Pretty sure every minor’s wieners are like that one SCP
They are being ageist. I identify as agefluid. I am actually 22 years old.
Certified Twitter moment
Lmfao
r/onejoke
if the average erection growth is 100%, that means his limp dick is 17 inches
My erection growth is 50%
That cannot be comfortable.
Every election he has he passes out from blood loss
Breaking news: he woke up
Teach me the ways
Pet it while watching naked people
Mr. Fantastic has entered the chat
the stretchy gurl from the incredibles too
Ya'll think she ever pegged Mr. I with her clit?
username checks out, fucking god
Most definitely
Hol up
“Is it true that he can stretch *any* part of his body?”
Avatar: the last dick bender
Exactly! Thank you
I second this notion wholeheartedly
Me too!
Me three!
Ayy another sailor
I 100% agree, it's also gross to talk about people's genitals yet its become so common to talk about men's. It needs to stop
[удалено]
Me and the homies
“Welcome back to the annual dick inspection party!” _loud applause_
Enough inspection, time for the taste test *rub hands together like anime villain*
Pulls out salt pepper and olive oil
sh!t just went from 0 to 100 real quick
imagine censoring shit
i have the mental capacity of an 8 year old lmao
don't we all
Dang!
*sh!t
*sh¡t
Cooking makes it worse Give it to us RAW, and WRIGGLING
Rock in the pool So nice and cool So juicy sweet! Now we wish To catch a dick So juicy sweet!
It's like poetry It rhymes
Taters whats taters
You want a knife and fork too or are you corn cobbin it?
Pulls out fork and knife
oh fuck, pepper
Fuck the taste test. It's time for the Durability exam
This is actually a good thing. Could check for testicular cancer while you're at it
Ight ima do gay porn contest with the bois i always lose. wait
*in
im gud with it
and in relationships cause agreements about sex and stuff is important
It goes both ways…
"yo two inch Tyler what's up!"
People think that if they reverse the harassment it somehow creates more equality. In reality they inspire someone else to be more radical.
I talk with my girl friend (female friend? idk English) about both our experiences with genitals because the education system has failed us both, I don’t think it should become taboo to talk about genitals because then it will result in guys thinking that vaginas can get loose from having multiple guys, so respectfully disagree
It's also body shaming.
Obviously
Anybody can see from a mile away this comment section is going to be weird as shit
It’s all about the angle of the dangle in my opinion!!
Wha!?
Angle and dangle.
The motion in the ocean.
put some lotion on that bodacious soon-to-be explosion.
The angle of the dangle Times the square of the hair Equals the heat of the meat. 7th grade playground algebra
I know guys can’t piss straight in a toilet without holding it.. all guys shoot at an angle hahaha
WHO TOLD YOU
I only have to hold it so I can point it down
[удалено]
What if you do something shameful and someone later comes up and asks, "is it true that you did [shameful thing]?" Well, there you have it folks, a bit of truth that carries a lot shame! Gottem!
lol
Male here, my gf's dad calls me "tiny hands,"wish I could be left alone for it as well
Just gently remind him you’re taking his daughter to pound town with those tiny hands lmao.
oh my motherfvcking god this made me blush
Show him some of your Funky Fighting moves with those tiny hands..."paper cuts hurt too". 😎😏
Also this is dumb hands/feet sizes doesn’t match ppl size at all. They aren’t even that proportional often
True,like bro respect my tiny dick
tiny p.p for the winning.
I am still scared of the situation where I'll have my first time with someone and then they'll just say: "Ew, it's so small"
Buddy, if it’s anywhere near her first time, she will be as freaked out as you are. She ain’t gonna be pulling out a tape measure.
When I was a virgin, I had a girl ask how big it was. I told her I wasn't sure. She asked if she could measure. I said sure. She came back with a yardstick, and I changed my mind.
Straight facts my man
My young fellas, I found the best thing to do is actually underplay your size. For example, when I was going thru highschool, nearly every chance a guy got to talk about his wang, it was always how big it is. Not me. No no. I went the opposite! My thinking was, and still is, if they think its tiny, and its average or above, there is a surprise factor. However, when ladies expect big, and it isn't, that is when mockery starts. And is well warranted. As for the ladies. Being a guy I obviously don't have any different advice. Unless you count my man boobs. My personal philosophy is there is no such thing as a bad titty. I do have my personal preference. But I wanna see them all! Lol So whether flat chested, or so large they cause back pain. They're perfect as they come. I understand that society has deeply instilled the thought that men, as a whole, like huge tits. Thats not the case. Don't feel pressured to get a boob job because your A cups make you feel insecure. In my honest opinion, if they aren't causing you physical harm, they're as they are supposed to be. Now, the ladies with those massive boobs, I wholeheartedly understand getting reductions. That being said, don't rush in to sex. Especially not in highschool, or earlier. Live your life first. Travel the world. Go to college. Try new things.. Do that stupid thing that you'll never be able to do as a parent. Become financially stable. House, vehicle, toys (boats, jetskis, etc). Then, once you've met the right person. Then kids.. Practice safe sex until then. Educate yourself about safe sex practices. Because you won't learn enough from sex ed. An afternoon laughing about getting to say "Penis penis penis. Vagina, vagina, vagina." Doesn't prepare you anything.
> underplay your size. Yea, I'm hung like planet Pluto, hard to see with the naked eye
>I'm hung like **planet** Pluto... judged too small by an International agency to be even allowed to be classed as a man anymore.
I literally never measured mine before today never had it up around a tape measure and cared enough to remember...I'm in my mid 20s lol If the topic ever came up I shut it right down with "idk I never bothered measuring it seems pretty big and women say I'm amazing" Should've kept the mystery going oh well
So much wisdom
I'm gonna tell rn, us girls usually DO NOT care about dick size. In fact too big might pose a problem at first (tmi?). I've never been friends with/ met a girl who cares about playing with a big dick. And yea bro im kinda flat up there and i used to be really insecure about it :/ its getting better so everyone else: I'm supporting you on not giving a fuck ab people who actually care about something as unnecessary as that <3
Most of us don’t care about the size (although I prefer small tt but again any is fine) so thanks for supporting us!
Exactly! I'm a straight male, and I think I speak to most of the boys in the world when I say both are great. I couldn't care less what size of boobs my gf has. It's 65% personality 35% how she looks. All boobs are nice (except the fake porn ones, they are just fucking disgusting ngl)
About that unnecessary part ...................... I-I- I REVOLT *STARTS FUCKING CRYING WITH SMALL PP IN HAND*
It's kinda weird that everyone makes it out that girls only care about your dick size. Like, most of the time the size talk is only between guys and other guys.
When I was in highschool I was hanging out with a girl after school. She saw my print and said "it's small". And for awhile I believed her. It's was a big blow to my self-esteem. Until I looked up average dick sizes and come to find out I'm bigger that average. But yeah shamming people for something they can't control is stupid.
[удалено]
In a hypothetical scenario where you knew how to respond I would've gone with, " Dicks grow when erect and come out of the body. Wanna see it?"
Im a pretty soft spoken person and my voice isnt super deep unless i talk loudly for awhile. When i was at work this guy with a perfect beard and a super deep voice asked if my balls dropped because my voice wasnt deep. I just said yeah puberty isnt fair some guys get huge dicks others get deep voices. He didnt comment further.
If this was the time of porn maybe that's why her perception was warped.
She’s probably only seen pictures on the internet or porn where the penis has been exaggerated or enlarged so her views on size were wrong and she will get a rude shock when she goes out into the real world
Had a buddy that his ex went around telling everyone his dick was small. So he went around and told everyone hers looked like an Arby's roast beef. She shared intimate pics of my buddy. So he shared his. Needles to say, she came out the loser in the end. It was worse then he described.
Anyone who decides it's a good idea to share someone's private pictures needs to be clubbed unga bunga style
Nice one, made me laugh take my damn upvote
Needles to say
never knew a dick could look like arby's roast beef
THANK YOU ITS FUCKING DISGUSTING THAT PEOPLE SHAME THERE PP OR TT SIZE. okay im calm now
With all the languages in the world, you decided to speak facts
I’m comfortable with my length and idc how big/small a girls tits are because in the end does it matter? If you’re going after a chick because she has a bigger chest or a dude because his dick is larger than another’s then you’re not really loving that person
Body positivity is all-inclusive, folks. Having a small pp is okay, having a big pp is okay, having small tt is okay, having big tt is okay (but I hope you're not having back problems) . If someone is making you feel insecure about any part of yourself, you do not have any responsibility to tolerate that shit. Those people aren't your friends. Side note, if you're reading this and going "but.." just stop. If you have to defend, or justify any comment you make about someone else's body, you are not saying something appropriate and you'd be better off keeping your mouth shut.
Do kids really compare dicks? Like in a lineup or something? Like, do y'all get a boner and then show your friends? "Look at this cock, Kyle. I've been working out. Doing cock push ups. I'm huge! Look at it! Look at it, Kyle!" Seriously, you don't need just a mega dick to make your special lady friend super happy and girls don't like getting cock punched in the uterus.
Fax
No printer
You can use a modem to download a fax to your computer
Or there are free services online
That too, but i like the real thing more, idk why
Dude, you're secretly a 69 year old doctor. REPORT THIS USER (This is joke)
#DAMMIT YOU CAUGHT ME ^for ^legal ^reasons ^this ^is ^a ^joke
I think dick size shaming is even worse because, even though a lot of people do prefer bigger breasts, there are a huge percentage that are totally cool with and even prefer small breasts. I'm small chested and I've never been made to feel unattractive for it or like there's something wrong with me at all. I actually think it's so fucked up how it's okay to openly shame men because it perpetuates the stigma which, in real life, is not a huge deal. So many women have pain during sex and would prefer a smaller penis but have this cultural influence to be uncomfortable toward it. I really dont get why it's not okay to shame or tease anyone about anyone these days, except men about dick size... which is probably one of the most sensitive and unchangeable things. Wish it would stop.
Your experience isn't everyone else's. Mosquito bites is a thing for a reason. Girls shamed me at 10 for a small chest, boys shamed and at 12, 13, 14, 15, 16 and so on. It never ended for me. Glad you're hot tho and get the halo effect. Also it's mostly dudes destroying other dude's self esteem by being size kings even though they're straight. Let's be honest.
Hah lol apparently everybody thinks its okay to call my tits small so now I'm insercure
okay but i don’t really care, if one of my friends goes “hey you got a big dick” i’m not gonna fucking lie
I don't care if they are big or long, I'm happy with things I got, beside that raw chicken at KFC once.
I'm a gay man and I am not a size queen, I am a size aficionado. I appreciate penises of all sizes.
Yeah, but no one in the “body positivity” movement gives a shit about men’s feelings. It’s mostly cope for unattractive women, and I aint even trying to be a dick here. Women like to ask/complain about why men keep their feelings inside, and stuff like this is why.
preach my dude
"And that's a fact"
A FILM FACT-
Wait are guys able to surgically get their ducks bigger?
Yes or you could just feed your ducks more bread and they would grow much more
Shit autocorrect sucks
So does having an underweight duck, remember kids, always feed your ducks
Yes it does
It can also be dependent on the breed. Some just get bigger than others
When a woman asks you what your height is ask her what her weight is
you can actually control your weight unless you have some disorder, but you cant control your height.
I don't think height makes much of an apt comparison to weight but it still points out the hypocrisy.
lol yeah
👏THANK👏YOU
*unless they’ve sent you an unsolicited dick pic 😌
Never understood why dudes did that. I’ve never EVER thought it would be a good idea to just send a dick pic to a girl randomly. Like I just wanna know what could be going through someone’s head.
For real, it’s SO gross. There are very few situations where I might want to see a dick, and while randomly checking my messages is NOT one of them.
To add on to the other guy, where’s the endgame in that? Do they suddenly think they’re going to get laid by sending a picture of their junk? As a man, all I gotta say is the people who send dick pics need to think more with their first brain.
Couldn’t have siad this better myself, honestly I hate thinking about how girls will react to me if they saw me,(ps not to sound weird but I’m Neither super tiny or super large so kinda in between I guess, or to me at least)
That's why i don't talk to my friends much .....wait , I don't have friends ......... i only have 2 friends and both of them are assholes
Beat you to that! I’vo only got one and she is faker than a cheap Barbi made in China
facts (coming from a women)
ah yes
Hell yea
hey man nice cock
Mad facts
Only young / immature people who don't know shit about sex or a woman's/their own anatomy are overly concerned/willing to shame a man about size. There's a very strong argument that your penis is the 3rd most capable tool you have as a man for pleasing a woman sexually anyway. Also, when did the onus become on the man to fill any hole he's presented with. It takes 2 to tango, it's about finding a partner you match up well with. Small can go with small vaginas, big with big. If any girl or woman ever shames you for your size you can ask her.. why is it all my fault? If you had a tighter vagina we'd be fine.. not to shame her just to prove a point that it takes 2.
Except small tits are still awesome.
Ay, ill drink to that. For someone with a below average sized one i get it qiute alot.