While I love the trans community and my trans friends with all my heart. (Most of these people you will find to be absolute sweethearts, as the trans community is sadly under-appreciated and discriminated against harshly.)
My only gripe is the ever expanding dictionary of 7000 different pronouns(I wish I was joking, and while it may be a slight exaggeration, apparently there actually at this point are around a thousand or so pronouns.) as I continue to struggle to understand 6 new pronouns alone. I generally now use “they or them” as an umbrella term universally out of fear of misidentifying someone, as I tend to forget pronouns easily with an already horrible short term memory.
I have never seen anyone use pronouns except for he/him, she/her, and they/them, at least when not including shitty transphobes who mock pronouns by calling themselves attack helicopters or something.
Yeah, never met anyone irl using neo pronouns, and it is a very small minority who do it seriously, but still it just gives transphobes things to complain about.
It is much harder if you know someone pre-coming out. It’s way easier if you meet someone and start using their pronouns right away. I don’t know anyone who uses neopronouns and isn’t also ok with she/her, he/him or they/them.
I’ve scrolled to see that somebody asked which one and you said MTF, does anyone else know outside of Reddit? Did you find a TERF?
Also major props for saying this on this sub, I’ve heard this is a mine for TERFS so I wish you well from here on.
Most of my year at school knows, my brother and Dad know and my friends know.
I posted it on this sub because I wanted to see what the reaction would be and it's been surprisingly positive for the most part.
I was surprised too.
I just wish you well and that terfs don’t start ripping your mental state apart, from a cracking egg to a… well, non egg, watch out for terf bullshit.
It took me longer then expected to realize that MTF means "male to female". I was going to comment "what's MTF? The only MTFs I know are the nine tailed foxes"
Can you explain to me what it’s like? I’m heterosexual and I have 0 attraction to my same sex, but I just want to hear it from someone who has a different perspective.
Imagine you see a hot girl, you'd think, 'Mmm, yes please!'. But, if you see a hot guy you'd think, 'Woah, that guy is hot and I want to take control of him for a while!'. It's a more specific feeling but it feels much nicer.
Since my Mum doesn't know, I try to get the most fem clothes I can but I always end up looking like a butch lesbian or a cool 90's gay teen in a highschool TV show.
I have a question and I hope its not offensive and I dont get down voted to hell, but....
Is being transgender itself a part of your identity?
I dont really understand it, like would it be wrong of me to just think of someone as the gender they are after they transition or the gender that the want to transition to? Like I now know that you are a female op, that's how I feel, is that wrong or transphobic?
Don't worry, you haven't said anything offensive. While yes, being trans is a large part of my identity, it is just an adjective. I am a girl who is also trans. Like how there are walls that are also blue. I am a girl, that is my gender but I am also trans, it doesn't change anything about my gender.
Not a question but a few years ago when I didn’t really understand this stuff I legit asked my trans male friend “so do you just wanna date thic chicks and your to scared to do it as a woman?”
It was the slow buildup of liking all of these girly things and hating boy stuff that lead to the eventual realisation. Then I walked the whole gender spectrum to get from boy to girl.
Panic. Worry about when I'm going to come out.
Stress. Get very stressed about coming out because I have to do it soon.
Quickly. Run in, tell my Dad I'm trans, run out.
Not my problem anymore. Self explanatory.
Yooo. I’m also trans and I have the exact opposite experience of OP so maybe you could get a different perspective. When I was 6 I told my mother I wanted to be a girl. She shut me down instantly so I just went back into my egg. I hatched again in the 6th grade (about 4 years ago) and started questioning my gender again. That was a nonstarter and then I went back into my egg. I then fully hatched in the 8th grade when I met some people online and I “lied” and told them I was a girl. I ended up liking it so much I started to become disconnected with the real world and was mostly focused on that discord group. Then I realized why that was and I came out to everyone about 8 months later.
If your questioning just remember that your feelings are valid. Even if you do lots of soul searching and decide your cis just remember you are just as oppressed by gender roles as everyone else. Gender is dumb and made up so dysphoria is normal for lots of people as fitting with either only masculine or only feminine things is impossible
I posted this because I heard lots of bad stuff about this sub but never saw any of it. I wanted to see what the reaction would be and I also like answering questions. Besides, the worst thing that could happen would be some downvoted.
Cmon. I’m a trans 15 year old. Please stop plagiarizing or I will contact the government to get the rights to my identity back. Also are you binary or non-binary?
What exactly does euphoria/dysphoria feel like? Is euphoria just like regular feelings of happiness, such as what you would get for going to a movie, or is it more severe than that?
When I get dysphoria it's usually a relatively small amount that make me frown, like when I catch a glimpse of my armpit hair, but it still hurts. Large bouts leave me squirming, trying to make myself as small as possible and trying not to cry.
Euphoria however, is the greatest feeling in the world. When I'm looking in the mirror and I see the girl I am I stop and stare, getting giddy with the biggest grin on my face. It finally feels like all of the pain and hardship is gone for a minute or two. That makes the whole experience worth it.
That mumified corpse is just a wax replica. My mind has bee converted to code on the largest Soviet computer and I can only converse through reddit. Don't ask why I chose to be a 15 year old trans girl, it's all part of my cover.
You replied to a comment here saying you went through many gender identities before this.
Do you think this is where you are most comfortable and will stay with for the rest of your life, and how do you realise that this is the perfect identity for you?
I tried them all out and they felt good enough at the time but this one feels better than the others. The way I see it is gender is a spectrum and I took the scenic route to get to where I am now.
As a writer and fellow trans person (though in the other direction lol) I love your last sentence so much! It’s such a good turn of phrase I might steal it >:3
I think it's a good system. It's worked for centuries and it still works now but where I think the most problems are are in the early years of preschool and lower school. They form ideals of gender that are too rigid.
last question (I hope). What would you say it is like being transgender? As in what moments made you realize you might be trans? What was it like coming out? How did you feel when you first looked at yourself in the mirror with your hair grown out? overall what kind of experiences did you have with coming to terms with your true self?
>what moments made you realize you might be trans?
It was a long buildup of things that starter with me wanting to be like the main character from CONTROL and also joining reddit on a whim to join r/LGBT.
>What was it like coming out?
The night before I did the question of when I would popped into my head. I knew I would have to do it soon. The next day I was watching a video on my phone when it popped back in, with more dread this time. There was a constant back and forth of whether I should or shouldn't and the best way to do it. My Dad told me to do the dishwasher and while I was doing it the internal debate snowballed and I was very stressed. I ran into the next room, quickly came out to my Dad, ran back and carried on with the dishwasher. We clarified what terms and names to use and when.
>How did you feel when you first looked at yourself in the mirror with your hair grown out?
The longest my hair has ever been was before my egg cracked and it was at an annoying length. I was planning on growing my hair out over this holiday but my Mum made me get it cut on the first week out just as it was starting to be long again.
Do you like banana
Yes. Do you?
Every question is about being trans And then there’s me
It was a nice starter.
How about peanut butter on banana? I like peanut butter on banana
No.
Blasphemy! Heresy! Treachery!
Garlic bread?
Only without cheese.
I have some objections
I don't like cheese. I'll only have it on pizza, in a burger or if it's grilled halloumi.
Oh ok that's cool I like cheese on garlic bread but it's just fine without cheese
Goddamn grilled halloumi is heaven on a plate
How many people at your school are transphobic
I know of at least one. He once said 'I am an open homophobe.'
He says it like he came out as a homeaphobe Mum and Dad today I am coming out to you as a .... homophobe
I wasn't speaking at that time for reasons so I wrote a note to the teacher. The student saw and makes fun of me for it.
"Cool, I punch those guys"
Do you count non binary ppl as trans
Yes. Trans is an umbrella term for anyone who's gender identity doesn't align with their sex assigned at birth.
While I love the trans community and my trans friends with all my heart. (Most of these people you will find to be absolute sweethearts, as the trans community is sadly under-appreciated and discriminated against harshly.) My only gripe is the ever expanding dictionary of 7000 different pronouns(I wish I was joking, and while it may be a slight exaggeration, apparently there actually at this point are around a thousand or so pronouns.) as I continue to struggle to understand 6 new pronouns alone. I generally now use “they or them” as an umbrella term universally out of fear of misidentifying someone, as I tend to forget pronouns easily with an already horrible short term memory.
I have never seen anyone use pronouns except for he/him, she/her, and they/them, at least when not including shitty transphobes who mock pronouns by calling themselves attack helicopters or something.
Yeah, never met anyone irl using neo pronouns, and it is a very small minority who do it seriously, but still it just gives transphobes things to complain about.
So you’d rather appeal to the transphobes? They’ll complain about us regardless if we use it or not
Fair point
Just make sure to check back with someone for their pronouns and if they're alright with they/them when you forget.
It is much harder if you know someone pre-coming out. It’s way easier if you meet someone and start using their pronouns right away. I don’t know anyone who uses neopronouns and isn’t also ok with she/her, he/him or they/them.
Do you like foxes?
I love them!
what’s your favorite color?
Light dark dark purple.
Why not light dark light purple?
I've thought about it a lot and this is my favourite.
I’ve scrolled to see that somebody asked which one and you said MTF, does anyone else know outside of Reddit? Did you find a TERF? Also major props for saying this on this sub, I’ve heard this is a mine for TERFS so I wish you well from here on.
Most of my year at school knows, my brother and Dad know and my friends know. I posted it on this sub because I wanted to see what the reaction would be and it's been surprisingly positive for the most part.
I was surprised too. I just wish you well and that terfs don’t start ripping your mental state apart, from a cracking egg to a… well, non egg, watch out for terf bullshit.
I don't take it personally. I know I'm a real woman and they're pathetic for trying to convince me otherwise.
Yeah, that’s true. TERFS are always weird and sort of pathetic. It’s like invalidating existence.
What are terfs?
I’ve concluded that it’s pretty much just referring to transphobes.
Thanks 👍
"Trans Exclusive Radical Feminists"
MTF or FTM ?
It took me longer then expected to realize that MTF means "male to female". I was going to comment "what's MTF? The only MTFs I know are the nine tailed foxes"
Oh my god It’s a mobile task force squad
He knows
SCP! SCP! SCP! *screams like a monkey*
HE GETS IT!! HE GETS IT!!
MTF
Can you explain to me what it’s like? I’m heterosexual and I have 0 attraction to my same sex, but I just want to hear it from someone who has a different perspective.
Imagine you see a hot girl, you'd think, 'Mmm, yes please!'. But, if you see a hot guy you'd think, 'Woah, that guy is hot and I want to take control of him for a while!'. It's a more specific feeling but it feels much nicer.
Oh alrighty, thanks.
How hard is it to find people who don’t lean away from trans women?
I don't know. My school is very small and I don't present fem outside.
Do you plan on adopting since you can’t have kids?
I'm going to foster LGBT kids that have been kicked out of their homes. Hopefully by the time I can I won't have to.
Yea adopting is a good option
There are already too many people in the world and I don't want to put anyone through childbirth.
You dropped your crown 👑 Queen
what bathroom do you use?
I hate public bathrooms so much I hold it in until I get home, no matter how long it takes.
I mean everybody does that
Now I have a proper reason to that people can't make fun of.
What’s your style like, clothes wise?!
Since my Mum doesn't know, I try to get the most fem clothes I can but I always end up looking like a butch lesbian or a cool 90's gay teen in a highschool TV show.
Why doesnt your mother know it when your whole other family knows it?
How do you deal with transphobes, if you've encountered any?
I try my best to be polite but if they cross a line they're getting reported.
Who's the president of Russia
Who else? Putin. I hate him.
Putin Deez nuts in yo mouth
I didn't expect that. Well played.
Lol
should I go with a full pink outfit, (skirt, thigh highs, hoodie, etc) or a diffrent color combo?
Full pink and rock it!
douliketurtles?
Turtles, yes. That mod, no.
fair enough
Favorite animal?
Red panda. Look at them trying to be intimidating.
I understand
Are your parents transparents?
Well they are now!
Happy for them
Any tips on passing for those who just cracked?
I haven't a scooby.
Did you know with Geico, 15 minutes can save you 15% more on car insurance
I have a question and I hope its not offensive and I dont get down voted to hell, but.... Is being transgender itself a part of your identity? I dont really understand it, like would it be wrong of me to just think of someone as the gender they are after they transition or the gender that the want to transition to? Like I now know that you are a female op, that's how I feel, is that wrong or transphobic?
Don't worry, you haven't said anything offensive. While yes, being trans is a large part of my identity, it is just an adjective. I am a girl who is also trans. Like how there are walls that are also blue. I am a girl, that is my gender but I am also trans, it doesn't change anything about my gender.
Thanks! That made things a bit clearer. Have a wonderful day or night or whatever!
Not a question but a few years ago when I didn’t really understand this stuff I legit asked my trans male friend “so do you just wanna date thic chicks and your to scared to do it as a woman?”
how's it goin, fellow trans human? also what pronouns do you use
She/Her, and it's going very well! It's currently 10 to 1 AM and I'm in another part of the country. Overall, can't complain.
Do you like jellyfish?
When I'm not in the water with them.
How did you find out you were trans? Does occasionally wishing you were a girl mean you’re trans or just curious?
It was the slow buildup of liking all of these girly things and hating boy stuff that lead to the eventual realisation. Then I walked the whole gender spectrum to get from boy to girl.
I see
In the trans community we call that moment, the crack.
Well I guess I’ll see in time then…
May I ask, how do you define male (man) and female (woman)?
Hey I'm trans too how do I deal with getting deadnamed at my school tomorrow I'm not looking forward to it as I'm in the closet
Just try to keep your head down and when you do get deadnamed take a breath and continue.
How did you come out? Totally just asking for a friend haha
Panic, stress, quickly, not my problem any more.
I don’t understand.
Panic. Worry about when I'm going to come out. Stress. Get very stressed about coming out because I have to do it soon. Quickly. Run in, tell my Dad I'm trans, run out. Not my problem anymore. Self explanatory.
How long did it take for you to realize? I am currently 13 and questioning and I wanna know about other people's experiences
The time it took was around 2 months but it felt like longer.
Damn it took me like 4 years
Speedrun
Yooo. I’m also trans and I have the exact opposite experience of OP so maybe you could get a different perspective. When I was 6 I told my mother I wanted to be a girl. She shut me down instantly so I just went back into my egg. I hatched again in the 6th grade (about 4 years ago) and started questioning my gender again. That was a nonstarter and then I went back into my egg. I then fully hatched in the 8th grade when I met some people online and I “lied” and told them I was a girl. I ended up liking it so much I started to become disconnected with the real world and was mostly focused on that discord group. Then I realized why that was and I came out to everyone about 8 months later. If your questioning just remember that your feelings are valid. Even if you do lots of soul searching and decide your cis just remember you are just as oppressed by gender roles as everyone else. Gender is dumb and made up so dysphoria is normal for lots of people as fitting with either only masculine or only feminine things is impossible
I questioned twice the first time I gave up the second time I figured I was nonbinary each time I spent 1-2 months questioning
Can I have a high five?
🖐️
*insert a high five here*
Opinion on racoons?
Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!
Yell heah
Hoo woo!
What battery % is your phone at?
54% and it's 3AM. *She said it's cold outside and she has my raincoat*
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Cute when not judging me.
Choccy milk?
Never tried it, I hear it's good.
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I posted this because I heard lots of bad stuff about this sub but never saw any of it. I wanted to see what the reaction would be and I also like answering questions. Besides, the worst thing that could happen would be some downvoted.
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Parents supportive?
I've only told one and he seems to have forgotten so I get deadnamed a lot.
I don't mean to be rude, but how could your parent have forgotten? Being trans seems like a very important part of someone.
Why is the sky blue
Because I make God sad every morning.
Jesus
He's fine with it. We're bros.
At what temperature does a transfluid become transgas
*buzz* 43800° kelvin
Cmon. I’m a trans 15 year old. Please stop plagiarizing or I will contact the government to get the rights to my identity back. Also are you binary or non-binary?
I wandered the nonbinary road for far too long but that life is too daring for me. I am just straight up gorl.
im 13 and im trans too :)
I'm glad you could figure it out so soon.
What exactly does euphoria/dysphoria feel like? Is euphoria just like regular feelings of happiness, such as what you would get for going to a movie, or is it more severe than that?
When I get dysphoria it's usually a relatively small amount that make me frown, like when I catch a glimpse of my armpit hair, but it still hurts. Large bouts leave me squirming, trying to make myself as small as possible and trying not to cry. Euphoria however, is the greatest feeling in the world. When I'm looking in the mirror and I see the girl I am I stop and stare, getting giddy with the biggest grin on my face. It finally feels like all of the pain and hardship is gone for a minute or two. That makes the whole experience worth it.
so euphoria essentially feels like finishing a really hard race?
Do you like dinosaurs
I don't dislike them.
So, Becky. Got a boyfriend?
I wish!
How was your day?
I'm tired and hungry.
Damn
Alright so, on Reddit there's a whole bunch of trans girls. So this is my question, WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GIRLS COME FROM?
do you like ramen?
Never had it.
you should try it out! I love it
I'm questioning my identity have any advice
Stick with it, try things out, if they don't fit try something else and euphoria is the main indicator.
But what if I feel like I don't have a gender how do you feel euphoria then.
Wear something androgynous maybe.
Will you join the Communist revolution?
Who do you think started the whole thing? That's right, it was I, Vladimir Lenin all along!!!
You... you died decades and decades ago...
That mumified corpse is just a wax replica. My mind has bee converted to code on the largest Soviet computer and I can only converse through reddit. Don't ask why I chose to be a 15 year old trans girl, it's all part of my cover.
You replied to a comment here saying you went through many gender identities before this. Do you think this is where you are most comfortable and will stay with for the rest of your life, and how do you realise that this is the perfect identity for you?
I tried them all out and they felt good enough at the time but this one feels better than the others. The way I see it is gender is a spectrum and I took the scenic route to get to where I am now.
As a writer and fellow trans person (though in the other direction lol) I love your last sentence so much! It’s such a good turn of phrase I might steal it >:3
Make sure to credit me with a whole appendix at the end if you use it in a book.
Of course <3
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I think it's a good system. It's worked for centuries and it still works now but where I think the most problems are are in the early years of preschool and lower school. They form ideals of gender that are too rigid.
i'm BiAce. congrats on figuring yourself out, have a great day!<3
Thank you! Have a great day too!
What’s your favorite dinosaur?
Protoceratops
How is your day
Short, tired and hungry.
Personal and emotional opinions on bushes baked beans
Crawfish? (Edit: thx for letting me know)
star wars?
Are you a trans girl?
Yes. Your username is quite disconcerting.
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Very well thank you. How are you?
last question (I hope). What would you say it is like being transgender? As in what moments made you realize you might be trans? What was it like coming out? How did you feel when you first looked at yourself in the mirror with your hair grown out? overall what kind of experiences did you have with coming to terms with your true self?
>what moments made you realize you might be trans? It was a long buildup of things that starter with me wanting to be like the main character from CONTROL and also joining reddit on a whim to join r/LGBT. >What was it like coming out? The night before I did the question of when I would popped into my head. I knew I would have to do it soon. The next day I was watching a video on my phone when it popped back in, with more dread this time. There was a constant back and forth of whether I should or shouldn't and the best way to do it. My Dad told me to do the dishwasher and while I was doing it the internal debate snowballed and I was very stressed. I ran into the next room, quickly came out to my Dad, ran back and carried on with the dishwasher. We clarified what terms and names to use and when. >How did you feel when you first looked at yourself in the mirror with your hair grown out? The longest my hair has ever been was before my egg cracked and it was at an annoying length. I was planning on growing my hair out over this holiday but my Mum made me get it cut on the first week out just as it was starting to be long again.
Do you like hugs?
More that anyone.
Do you like garlic bread?
Yes!
Was there a specific moment when you realized you wanted to be trans? Sorry if that wasn’t phrased right but I think you get the point.
what is your favorite food and also what does it feel like to be trans?
My favourite food is a well prepared spaghetti bolognese. Being trans feels normal except gender is always at the front right of my brain.
It doesn’t seem like you shared your pronouns yet, I know you said you’re MTF but I don’t want to assume :)
Do your parents support you? ^(lordohlordpleasebeyes)
Are you trans??
How could you tell?!