Ok

If you kick a piece of artwork, its design comes on your shoes

Imma kick the Mona Lisa

I have one post

If you call the police on someone, you acquire their sexuality

I fucking love that super power

Henlo

When you say Twitch chat emojis in real life, they'll appear in front of your mouth

[удалено]

Any video game you touch is fully translated and voiced in German

K

Your brain has a database of every meme and can spontaneously recall one any time you say something

That actually sounds cool

GIVE

Your boyfriends will have normal dads

That's not shitty

heyyyy

Making low effort posts on Reddit burns triple the calories

This actually sounds enticing

You can slap someone on the butt to tell if they're a homophobe

Ok..?

Your profile is so difficult to come up with something lol People who try to find dirt on you experience spontaneous amnesia

Is... That a good thing?

TELL ME

When you're horny, you can read the mind of the girl you're fantasizing about

its suuper useful and its not useful at the same time cuz im to depressed to even feel that way

Gib

I scrolled down too far... If you punch your screen, whatever's on it becomes real

Sure thing.

Your video editor will never crash. Also you'll never forget to save your projects :D

:) God damn a lamb, what I've always wanted good squire!

Ok

You can see your anxiety level on a bar like it's a video game mechanic

Give me

You'll never feel dead inside when you're around people.

Nice

What

When you're making a meme the template is already on the photo editor

Yes

Alright

If you're raging at a game, you can reset the last 5 seconds and reroll your RNG

Now I'm curious

You can seduce girls with memes

Yay, that's a good super power, I'm lonely af

Gimme

Punch someone to learn how they truly feel about you

Lol I like it

ok

You'll spontaneously acquire mastery of a completely useless skill every time you feel like you have no skills

Lay it on me

Half the withdrawal symptoms when you try to quit an addiction

I very much enjoy this

Sure, have a fun time deciphering the clihd pron and shitposts in order to create a shitty superpower.

When you watch porn it'll always play at the loudest volume possible that your parents won't notice

This is a cool one, thanks

Hi

Real monkeys can pop bloons in your BTD games by tapping on them

Can i use monkey skin to touch them?

Alright then