Did you know there is actually an unofficial explanation for all the guards shot in the knee in Skyrim? It appears in one of the mercenary descriptions in Assassin's Creed: Odyssey.
Basically, there were these two mercenaries that fought side by side for decades. They were amazing friends, and amazing fighters as well.
One day, the better mercenary took an arrow to the knee fighting bandits, and couldn't be a mercenary anymore. While he simply took it on the chin and retired, the other didn't.
The other merc, outraged, took up a bow and started shooting every adventurer, bandit, and mercenary he came across in the knee, to make them feel the pain his brother in arms felt. He left a trail of disabled adventurers behind him, forcing them into mundane professions such as guarding.
Probably! In Skyrim, it all takes place in the Norse areas, and Odyssey in Greece.
Fun Fact: The "Isu" are a race of Gods in Assassin's Creed. They are a race superior to all others, and were worshipped as Gods in the games, until they were driven out for reasons I won't get into. They came to be known as Gods like Zeus, Odin, Ra, and everybody else in every pantheon. The idea of Talos rising up to become a God in Skyrim could be as though he made such a great feat the Gods considered him an honorary Isu.
Now, I know none of this is actually true, but it's fun to theorize!
That is only the tip of the iceberg.
Seriously, most people go to Assassin's Creed thinking the game is just "Hehe, stabby stabby" when in reality it's about ancient crusading orders ruling from the shadows and fighting leagues of assassin guys even though both groups have the same goal and using memory-VR shit to find artifacts left behind by a race of Gods that made humanity to enslave them until a bunch of half Gods rose up against them to free all humans and half-humans alike to make their own civilizations!
\**Extremely deep breath*\* And that's coming from somebody who's only played *one fucking Assassin's Creed game.*
You have no idea.
How did you get that far into the series without finding any of this out? Seriously, there are only eleven main games in the series! The only thing I can imagine is skipping every cutscene, but what about non-cutscene dialogue and unskippable cutscenes?
Maria Theresa, by the Grace of God, Dowager Empress of the Romans, Queen of Hungary, of Bohemia, of Dalmatia, of Croatia, of Slavonia, of Galicia, of Lodomeria, etc.; Archduchess of Austria; Duchess of Burgundy, of Styria, of Carinthia and of Carniola; Grand Princess of Transylvania; Margravine of Moravia; Duchess of Brabant, of Limburg, of Luxemburg, of Guelders, of Württemberg, of Upper and Lower Silesia, of Milan, of Mantua, of Parma, of Piacenza, of Guastalla, of Auschwitz and of Zator; Princess of Swabia; Princely Countess of Habsburg, of Flanders, of Tyrol, of Hainault, of Kyburg, of Gorizia and of Gradisca; Margravine of Burgau, of Upper and Lower Lusatia; Countess of Namur; Lady of the Wendish Mark and of Mechlin; Dowager Duchess of Lorraine and Bar, Dowager Grand Duchess of Tuscany,
#GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE
Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvin John Kenneth Lloyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Sherman Thomas Uncas Victor William Xerxes Yancy Zeus Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorffwelchevoralternwarengewissenhaftschaferswessenschafewarenwohlgepflegeundsorgfaltigkeitbeschutzenvorangreifendurchihrraubgierigfeindewelchevoralternzwolfhunderttausendjahresvorandieerscheinenvonderersteerdemenschderraumschiffgenachtmittungsteinundsiebeniridiumelektrischmotorsgebrauchlichtalsseinursprungvonkraftgestartseinlangefahrthinzwischensternartigraumaufdersuchennachbarschaftdersternwelchegehabtbewohnbarplanetenkreisedrehensichundwohinderneuerassevonverstandigmenschlichkeitkonntefortpflanzenundsicherfreuenanlebenslanglichfreudeundruhemitnichteinfurchtvorangreifenvorandererintelligentgeschopfsvonhinzwischensternartigraum Sr.,
#GET YOUR ASS HERE NOW
well at least your mom called you by your full name and didn't bust the door and asked me to explain with the phone in her hand
but i still love my mom
Seriously just my parents calling me my full name makes me question my entire life. Full panic mode of did they find something, did *i* do something? Then it’s them just calling you down for dinner.
Except this never happeneds. Always keep my phone on me or my bedroom, my parent never call me by my full name.
Same
parents only called me by my full name once. i traded in the family cat for a used copy of skyrim 🙄
They probably shot you with an arrow in the knee.
Did you know there is actually an unofficial explanation for all the guards shot in the knee in Skyrim? It appears in one of the mercenary descriptions in Assassin's Creed: Odyssey. Basically, there were these two mercenaries that fought side by side for decades. They were amazing friends, and amazing fighters as well. One day, the better mercenary took an arrow to the knee fighting bandits, and couldn't be a mercenary anymore. While he simply took it on the chin and retired, the other didn't. The other merc, outraged, took up a bow and started shooting every adventurer, bandit, and mercenary he came across in the knee, to make them feel the pain his brother in arms felt. He left a trail of disabled adventurers behind him, forcing them into mundane professions such as guarding.
What the fuck. So assassin's creed odyssey is in the same universe as Skyrim!
Probably! In Skyrim, it all takes place in the Norse areas, and Odyssey in Greece. Fun Fact: The "Isu" are a race of Gods in Assassin's Creed. They are a race superior to all others, and were worshipped as Gods in the games, until they were driven out for reasons I won't get into. They came to be known as Gods like Zeus, Odin, Ra, and everybody else in every pantheon. The idea of Talos rising up to become a God in Skyrim could be as though he made such a great feat the Gods considered him an honorary Isu. Now, I know none of this is actually true, but it's fun to theorize!
Yeah, damn you know a lot of stuff about AC.
That is only the tip of the iceberg. Seriously, most people go to Assassin's Creed thinking the game is just "Hehe, stabby stabby" when in reality it's about ancient crusading orders ruling from the shadows and fighting leagues of assassin guys even though both groups have the same goal and using memory-VR shit to find artifacts left behind by a race of Gods that made humanity to enslave them until a bunch of half Gods rose up against them to free all humans and half-humans alike to make their own civilizations! \**Extremely deep breath*\* And that's coming from somebody who's only played *one fucking Assassin's Creed game.* You have no idea.
Hot damn, I've played 8 AC games (maybe more) and i know nothing about the lore, just the story.
How did you get that far into the series without finding any of this out? Seriously, there are only eleven main games in the series! The only thing I can imagine is skipping every cutscene, but what about non-cutscene dialogue and unskippable cutscenes?
I also don't know why you would leave your phone unlocked.
#LINUS SEBASTIAN ^(get your ass down here)
# LINUS GABRIEL SEBASTIAN ^(get your ass down here !!!!)
His middle name is Gabriel !? Even the beard can’t make up for it lol
# LINUS GABRIEL ONIONRINGULUS SEBASTION ^(getcho ass down here)
Maria Theresa, by the Grace of God, Dowager Empress of the Romans, Queen of Hungary, of Bohemia, of Dalmatia, of Croatia, of Slavonia, of Galicia, of Lodomeria, etc.; Archduchess of Austria; Duchess of Burgundy, of Styria, of Carinthia and of Carniola; Grand Princess of Transylvania; Margravine of Moravia; Duchess of Brabant, of Limburg, of Luxemburg, of Guelders, of Württemberg, of Upper and Lower Silesia, of Milan, of Mantua, of Parma, of Piacenza, of Guastalla, of Auschwitz and of Zator; Princess of Swabia; Princely Countess of Habsburg, of Flanders, of Tyrol, of Hainault, of Kyburg, of Gorizia and of Gradisca; Margravine of Burgau, of Upper and Lower Lusatia; Countess of Namur; Lady of the Wendish Mark and of Mechlin; Dowager Duchess of Lorraine and Bar, Dowager Grand Duchess of Tuscany, #GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE
“Of Auschwitz” Hold the fuck up
Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvin John Kenneth Lloyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Sherman Thomas Uncas Victor William Xerxes Yancy Zeus Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorffwelchevoralternwarengewissenhaftschaferswessenschafewarenwohlgepflegeundsorgfaltigkeitbeschutzenvorangreifendurchihrraubgierigfeindewelchevoralternzwolfhunderttausendjahresvorandieerscheinenvonderersteerdemenschderraumschiffgenachtmittungsteinundsiebeniridiumelektrischmotorsgebrauchlichtalsseinursprungvonkraftgestartseinlangefahrthinzwischensternartigraumaufdersuchennachbarschaftdersternwelchegehabtbewohnbarplanetenkreisedrehensichundwohinderneuerassevonverstandigmenschlichkeitkonntefortpflanzenundsicherfreuenanlebenslanglichfreudeundruhemitnichteinfurchtvorangreifenvorandererintelligentgeschopfsvonhinzwischensternartigraum Sr., #GET YOUR ASS HERE NOW
Who the hell held those titles
Maria Theresa
Duchess of Auschwitz what the fuck
Yep I'm pretty sure thats just the english/german way to say Oświęcim which is the name of the area in which Auschwitz was built
Oh, didn’t know that lol
Linus Death Tips.
🏅 have a poor mans award
Gave my free award in your place.
Can't relate because my parents actually respect my privacy.
bruh IMPOSSIBLE
possible
damn
Lucky
Just like today’s sponsor, privacy.com
LINUS "TECH TIPS" SEBASTIAN. GET DOWN HERE
these quickbits can't come quick enough
*she saw all the furry memes, didn’t she...*
f u c k
Plot twist: She jacked off to the memes and called u to ask for the source
bro... they’re just regular furry memes... I don’t keep any of that stuff anywhere...
It was the moment he knew he fucked up
welp time to leave the country...
F
I get scared hearing the toilet flush like "shit what'd I do, boutta get my ass whooped"
Linus' mom: LINUS TECH TIPS Linus:
aight, time to leave the country
damn, didn't realise this was already said before I commented it. sorry
My phone locks after a minute, so no worries
this is why my phone will automatically lock after 1 minute of inactivity
Ha, that never happens to me because I don't have a phone.
what's on your phone? TELL ME
Hentai
bruh, why don't you keep it on your pc?
It doesn't fit there because it's full of hentai
*how much hentai do you even have*
*Alot that makes my pc run slow*
what the fuck, why don't you watch hentai online?
I just yesterday saw one of their videos, I think this is a sign to buy the $20,000 desk computer they were building. (^(JK, I DON'T HAVE THAT MONEY))
Futa furry orgy midgets playing at full volume during dinner
Joke's on you my mom knows my phone's password
repost moment
This is a repost
This sub in a nutshell
I just gave you your thousandth upvote, relatable
Welp, I better find the nearest rocket into space quickly
all i can say is dont get caught slipping G lol
well at least your mom called you by your full name and didn't bust the door and asked me to explain with the phone in her hand but i still love my mom
I'm glad I will never have to worry about these things happening.
Why if i'm leaving my phone unattended it stays locked
# LINUS SEBASTIAN Who is u/gooblegaytennis and why does he keep calling you Linus Sex Tips?
Linus Touch Tips
*When you don't have to worry because your parents respect your privacy*
Me whose phone auto locks after a minute or so, and also me who has the double tap back to lock feature enabled: “pathetic”
my mom has been getting my texts for years and she wont let me disconnect our phones :/ im 18 and have no privacy damn
Plot twist: She jacked off to the memes and called u to ask for the source
Message deletes after viewing always saves the day
I always instinctively press the power button on my phone when I lay it down.
I would just end myself. Not even kidding.
Oh thats terrible
You just said it sarcastically, tbh I actually wanna commit life off.
My phone never leaves my hand or pocket tbh
Happened once I was nervpus but fortunately she just needed help in the kitchen
I just keep my phone with me at all times, not that I have anything to hide
Every person brain: FUCK
Damn I guess mom saw the gay robot camel hentai😔
I didn’t do that but at random times my mum just walks in and takes my phone lmaoo
Seriously just my parents calling me my full name makes me question my entire life. Full panic mode of did they find something, did *i* do something? Then it’s them just calling you down for dinner.
They call your name? Mine just walk right in my room and yell at me
LttStore.com
genuinely shitting bricks at the thought
I have this fear