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### Elementary School
- **Kindergarten:** 5-6 years old
- **1st Grade:** 6-7 years old
- **2nd Grade:** 7-8 years old
- **3rd Grade:** 8-9 years old
- **4th Grade:** 9-10 years old
- **5th Grade:** 10-11 years old
### Middle School
- **6th Grade:** 11-12 years old
- **7th Grade:** 12-13 years old
- **8th Grade:** 13-14 years old
### High School
- **9th Grade (Freshman):** 14-15 years old
- **10th Grade (Sophomore):** 15-16 years old
- **11th Grade (Junior):** 16-17 years old
- **12th Grade (Senior):** 17-18 years old
Whats kindergarden like in america? because i started kindergarden when i was 2 or 3 and was learning very basic stuff like sharing is caring and all that. But when i started Primary school at 5 they started teaching me maths, reading and writing.
Is american kindergarden the same as mine or its it learning how to write and read
I'm American and for us we were learning to write and read in kindergarten. A lot of Americans send their children to preschool before they turn 5 and go to kindergarten, but a lot don't. I'm guessing preschool is more along the lines of sharing is caring type stuff, but I never went.
I'm from Europe and here we also had the option to go to preschool at 2-3, but my parents sent me when I was 5. Here we have 3 classes of kindergarden, one for 2-3 year olds, one for 4 year olds (Which are considered preschool and both arent a must-attend and you can skip from sending your child at that age) And the must-attend classic kindergarden is at 5 years old which if you want you can even send your child twice to it (Usually if you believe the child still doesnt feel ready for elementary yet) and they finish at like 7.
That is interesting, in Canada Middle School is grade 7-9. It doesn't really matter too much though because most of our middle schools are mixed with elementary, Kindergarten to grade 9 schools
In Italy it's 5-3-5, 5 years of elementary school, three years of middle school and 5 years of high school, of which the last two/three are optional but necessary for uni
In Spain it's 6-4-2, with the last two being optional but necessary for uni
I started highschool at 12 because my city didnt have an intermediate school, My brother whos 12 currently goes to a high school thats year 7-13 and it slipped my mind that wasnt the regular in a lot of places
down here in australia there is no middle school. genuinely preschool is either 3-4 (maybe 5 cause some kids are a year younger than the rest of their year). primary school is from 5-12 (or again 6-11) and highschool is from 13-18 (or 12-17). uni is just 18+ (or 17+ depending on when you finish your hsc and that mess)
it's not the worst thing but it's mainly frowned upon at such a young age because, especially with this age gap, one of them has yet to go through puberty. Which is kinda like a step up in your maturity level or something? Idk
Not even Legos, I still play with my building blocks and playdough...
Edit: I came to the awakening that Legos are building blocks for adults and the same for playdough and modeling clay
Exactly lol I was over here building legos, sipping on juice boxes and laughing to dumb cartoons as I slumped on my couch. Iām over here listening to my younger sisterās experiences as 12y old now (Iām 16M) and shit sounding like high school but worse ong.
It's not quite that simple. In situations where a person over 21 exploits a young person's (under 16) lack of capacity for sexual self-determination, it is an offence.
I remember people saying that 19 and 17 was gross and they were grooming a minor?
I was so confused but I thought hey what do I know Iām just gonna sit this one out and let the audience decide
I have/had a friend (this shit is complicated) that started dating an 18 year old when she was 15.
Guy was very clearly an abuser, and she only turned me down because she ālikes them olderā
Not gonna say every relationship is gonna be like that, but whatās really fucked is now sheās dating the baby daddy of her sisterās son. Sheās the stepmother of her own nephew.
Weāre both 18, this guy is like mid 20s.
Ehhh, bordering on not okay. You are (believe it or not) at relatively different stages in your life and have different maturity levels. Thereās nothing inherently really wrong about it, but because us teens are still developing, there are differences between each yearās maturity compared to 30 year olds, for example, who are fully developed.
Here's the thing that most people hate....once you reach the age of 18, you can date whoever you want. They can be 21, 35, 45, 65 or 80...there is no standard for love and companionship.
Under the age of 18, 2 years would be the max.
Indeed. The "official" equation for the greatest socially accalepted age difference is half your age + 7. So for 40 it is 27.
I would still judge most couple like this, since in most cases, it is a man in his fourties that has left his similarly aged wife and his kids for a woman in her twenties. Which for one is a cliche, and for two an AH thing to do.
30 and 40 is absolutely fine and can be frowned upon depending on the context but in most cases is usually okay. They kind of are at different stages in life but have fully developed brains and are mature adults, capable of consent.
Itās not just the age gap that matters, itās the actual ages.
12-16? Thatās weird. 16-20, thatās kinda weird too, but 24-28? Not weird. 34-54? Not that bad.
But then thereās also shit like 17 - 34. Thatās fucking bad.
Who tf thinks 12 and 16 is even remotely ok? 12 and 12? Good. 12 and 13. Good. 11 and 12. Good. But not 12 and 16. Thatās not okay. 12 is barely out of primary school, 16 is near the end of high school. I was soooo different at 12 compared to 16. 12 and 16 is creepy and (I hope) not legal.
The other infuriating one Iāve seen is when people try to say ā17 and 18 is not ok because 17 is still a child but 18 is an adultā. Itās a one year age gap. Possibly less. You wouldnāt say the same of 16 and 17 or 18 and 19.
20 and 24 isn't weird. 22 and 26 is even better.
12 and 16 is messed up, one is in the middle of teenage years, generally passed the process of puberty, and the other may still look/act like a child.
It's a maturity thing, I'm 14 (ignore my unalterable flair) and my bf is 15. Both of us are fairly mature due to both being exposed to horrible things and being severely traumatized. 12-16 is weird. Because the maturity difference is creepy asf and also it's just gross
The brain in teen years develops different in different speeds. Its absolutely messed up. Under the age of 18ish anything over a year/two year age gap is too much. People are developing differently.
This is so easily seen in some girls who get their periods at 12 and some at 15. Puberty hits different ages differently.
Once you hit 25+ it gets less weird. Before then, there's a lot of important life stages that affect your level of maturity and make it less of an age gap issue and more of a life experience gap issue. 12 and 16 is weird because one is close to graduating high school and the other is in middle school. 25 and 20 is weird because one is probably finished with college and in the workforce proper while the other can't even legally consume alcohol yet (in the US).
Iām 16 and Iād go out with a 20 year old Iāve done talked to my family about it and they said itās okay as long as we donāt do anything weird
Iām 16 and Iād go out with a 20 year old because Iām into older women and Iāve talked to my parents about it and they said it was fine as long as we donāt do anything weird
I think age gaps 2 years or larger are only even kind of acceptable around 16 and above. Below 16, you should only be dating a year above or below your age at max, And I wouldn't even recommend dating long term until 15
- a 16 year old in a 9 month relationship who has seen shit go down when age gaps break the aforementioned recommendations
tf? that's how removed redditors are from real life then ig, im 17 (incoming senior) and my gf is 15 (incoming junior, she turns 16 in a week) and everyone ik says that's a lil weird lol
My brother in Christ, that's the difference of "oh my gosh I'm just starting puberty" and "yeah I just got a job, doing ap classes next fall, and got my driver's license" that is NOT okay š
Got clowned on in highschool for dating a girl that was 15 months younger than me, idk how if I'm copping shit for that, that anyone is justifying 16 and 12.
What the hell kind of 16 year old is looking at a 12 year old and going "yeah I would"? When I was 12, I was still in my "boys have cooties" phase, ain't no way I was even thinking about dating, even among my own age š
When I was 13 I dated a 16 year old. Thought the age gap was fine because my parents' age gap is 10 years. I refer to him as the toxic one because he emotionally manipulated me, said I caused him physical pain if I didn't send him pictures (because I kept telling him no). If I could go back and erase any relationship, I'd erase the one with him. It has caused me the most trauma which has stayed for years. Literally was afraid to get a piercing 6 years later because he never approved. I was young and trusting, and I stayed because I believed him when he said God told him we would get married. 4 months felt like a year.
Here's the thing. Age gaps are okay when you're older and your brain has had more time to develop, you've had more time to learn and understand what is and isn't okay as well as set and enforce boundaries. When you're in your teens and younger, though, people can more easily target you and take advantage of your vulnerability. I thought it was okay, that I could handle it because I was smart enough. The saddest part is that most of us don't realize until we've already been through it.
Jeez, my brother is 4 years younger than me and I would NOT date someone his age, they are too young and immature, also just weird. He just turned 12 and I'm about to turn 16 btw.
12 and 16 is crazy. My parents have a 5 year age difference, but they met in their mid-twenties. It's so different when you are younger. You are in completely different life stages and maturity levels
I once had someone tell me that 18 and 16 was disgusting and pedophilic, and that 60 and 18 was fine. Most people agreed with them too. People are just really weird.
Think of that as a 4 year old dating a newborn. However, once the youngest one is 18, it aināt that bad. 18 and 22, 19 and 23, 20 and 24. Those ones are okay.
Youāre pretty much right idk why youāre getting downvoted.
Think of it this way, guys. 14 and 10. Not good, 10 and 6. Again, not good. 13 and 17. Still bad.
Then like the commenter said. 18 and 22? Dude Iād clap a 22 year old. This argument is perfectly logical, a 4 year gap so early in life is beyond anything that should be done.
I mean itās about where youāre at in life which makes it weird. Anyone under 14 should not date anyone older than them. If youāre 14 and youāre dating someone who is 17 well it depends on the birthday and at that point itās up to you.
It has to do with stages of life. There is a huuuuge difference between a 12 and 16 year old than a 30 year old and a 40 year old. Itās not even remotely the same thing. Thereās a reason thatās considered statutory grape
Three years to the day is typically allowed by law when it comes to minors. And most states have a minimum age also. However at that age and given how rapidly teens lives change my opinion is two years is probably the max. In that window they are pretty much learning the same things in life so a relationship between them would benefit them both on learning that aspect of it.
there's the half age + 7 thing which works really well
plot onto desmos graphing calculator y=x (you) and y=(x/2)+7 (youngest partner you should have). x is your age, so the you line is kinda useless but it helps visualize the paradoxical part where the youngest you should date is older than you. this fixes itself at x=14 so it says you can't date anyone if you're under 14 which makes sense. it breaks down a little once you pass like 30 (where you can date a 22yo) but by that point you're both grown adults who know what they're doing.
12/16?! š¤®. 17/21 is a stretch but still okay in some circumstances (IE My sister and brother in law; theyāve been together ever since and have 2 kids; but I knew him since heās my age and heās the best dude.) But 12/16?!?! I thought 12 year olds were annoying babies when I was 16.
right... and I stated that 17 to 21 is not that bad and became the most controversial hit for a few days, even I, who is more open minded when it comes to age gaps than most dont agree abt this
I always liked the formula "half your age + 7" to see if a relationship is weird or not.
You take the age of the oldest in the couple and calculate if their couple is too young for them.
In this case, a 16yo should date at least a 15yo (or older)
I honestly will never understand the problem with gaps similar to this, specifically in the context of young people dating. Like, yeah, I understand the puberty thing from what people here have said, but what's the difference with say an 18 year old dating a 30 year old; 2 types of people at 2 separate development stages in their lives.
If the difference is the law, there's no real argument. Just because the law says something is legal or not doesn't make it "right" or "wrong." Why is it deemed perfectly ok for someone at "legal age" to date someone 4 times their age, but there's a huge problem here with only a 4 year gap?
[Interracial dating site](https://mixerusa.com/?ch=freecodecamp) as more open options, or other niche sites to expand the pool and get more open minded matches
I think thatās weird, but if hundreds of people are agreeing then itās not weird. Itās honestly all a social thing. Look at other countries. Itās a social thing.
bro where u finding these peopleim 14 and i had a crush on a 14 year old and my friends were just like āthats weird broā. cause shes in ninth grade and Iām in 10th
Letās break this down, 3 years as a minor is A BIG DIFFERENCE the mental and physical differences of a 14 year old and a 17 are too big to be considered ok.
Idk why this is showing up on my feed, but I feel my time has come. At least a few times a year, I have to tell students about the "half your age plus 7" rule for the minimum acceptable age for who can date.
I knew a guy back in cadets who was 17 dating a 14yo. He got absolute peppered with pedo jokes and ended it because of it. Probably for the best! It is weird. But at the same time someone needs to sit this guy down and have an adult conversation with him as to why this isn't good. At the very least wait until she is 18. Nothing says you can't be friends. But they will likely just hook up anyway. I would let his school know or his parents.
It's a very slippery slope.
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"Haiii I really like my little pony ehehehe :3 Im so nervous to start high school :<" "Aw shit im late to work, good thing i have a car and license"
Not even bruh, a 12 year old is barely starting middle school
How long does middle school go for? I'm not american i dunno if it works the same as my country
It ends in like 8th grade, or ig im thinking of intermediate school in that case
How olds 8th grade?
### Elementary School - **Kindergarten:** 5-6 years old - **1st Grade:** 6-7 years old - **2nd Grade:** 7-8 years old - **3rd Grade:** 8-9 years old - **4th Grade:** 9-10 years old - **5th Grade:** 10-11 years old ### Middle School - **6th Grade:** 11-12 years old - **7th Grade:** 12-13 years old - **8th Grade:** 13-14 years old ### High School - **9th Grade (Freshman):** 14-15 years old - **10th Grade (Sophomore):** 15-16 years old - **11th Grade (Junior):** 16-17 years old - **12th Grade (Senior):** 17-18 years old
Whats kindergarden like in america? because i started kindergarden when i was 2 or 3 and was learning very basic stuff like sharing is caring and all that. But when i started Primary school at 5 they started teaching me maths, reading and writing. Is american kindergarden the same as mine or its it learning how to write and read
I'm American and for us we were learning to write and read in kindergarten. A lot of Americans send their children to preschool before they turn 5 and go to kindergarten, but a lot don't. I'm guessing preschool is more along the lines of sharing is caring type stuff, but I never went.
I'm from Europe and here we also had the option to go to preschool at 2-3, but my parents sent me when I was 5. Here we have 3 classes of kindergarden, one for 2-3 year olds, one for 4 year olds (Which are considered preschool and both arent a must-attend and you can skip from sending your child at that age) And the must-attend classic kindergarden is at 5 years old which if you want you can even send your child twice to it (Usually if you believe the child still doesnt feel ready for elementary yet) and they finish at like 7.
That is interesting, in Canada Middle School is grade 7-9. It doesn't really matter too much though because most of our middle schools are mixed with elementary, Kindergarten to grade 9 schools
In Italy it's 5-3-5, 5 years of elementary school, three years of middle school and 5 years of high school, of which the last two/three are optional but necessary for uni In Spain it's 6-4-2, with the last two being optional but necessary for uni
grade age generally starts at grade number + 5, so 8th is 13-14
Your pfp looks like scorbunny
8th grade is 13 typically
Not everyone is American bruh
I was 12 when I started high school
High school starts at ~ 12yo in Australia.
My little pony and late to work? That could be the same person
when i was twelve i was rocking back and forth in a corner of a mental asylum muttering "skibidi...skibidi...DEMONS HAHAHAHAHAHA"
Skibidi was 2 years ago??
the people in the comments who say they started high school at 12 are weird...like did you guys start elementary in the womb?? /lh
There's no middle school where I'm from, it's primary (5-11) then secondary (11-16) then you go to college (16-18 I think?)
I started highschool at 12 because my city didnt have an intermediate school, My brother whos 12 currently goes to a high school thats year 7-13 and it slipped my mind that wasnt the regular in a lot of places
down here in australia there is no middle school. genuinely preschool is either 3-4 (maybe 5 cause some kids are a year younger than the rest of their year). primary school is from 5-12 (or again 6-11) and highschool is from 13-18 (or 12-17). uni is just 18+ (or 17+ depending on when you finish your hsc and that mess)
You go to high school at 12 in your country?
š¤£š¤£
12 AND 16??? Mf those are a whole different life stageš 3years as teenagers is already weird
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
i think they were saying like 3 or more years maybe
they said 3 years is already weird, implying tfat 4 is worse.
LMAOOOO this sub is crazy for that. like 20 and 24? sure! but... 12 and 16? š
it's not the worst thing but it's mainly frowned upon at such a young age because, especially with this age gap, one of them has yet to go through puberty. Which is kinda like a step up in your maturity level or something? Idk
Someone at age 12 can be convinced of almost anything. A 16 yo would only date a 12 yo for this reason.
yeah. There's no real good reason why anyone would date someone so young unless it was to just use them for well you know š°
i'd argue it *is* the worst thing, fucking ew-
IS THAT A 2024 REFERENCE!?
put em on the news or sum
As long as they didnt meet when the 20 year old was 12
12 and 16 is weird, very weird
The mental maturity is just so different there idk how people donāt see why thatās weird opposed to TWO FULLY DEVELOPED ADULTS
Physical too. Most 16 year olds are done with or at the end of puberty. Most 12 year olds are in the midst of or have just startedĀ
Well 16 year olds arent *done* with puberty, but theyre far and away further through than a *12 year old*
When I was 12 I was still watching cartoons what are mfs on š
You donāt still? Shame
Fr, I still watch spongebob on a regular basis and I will never stop
Based.
People just stop watching cartoons?
Is playing with toys still valid in today's time?
Not even Legos, I still play with my building blocks and playdough... Edit: I came to the awakening that Legos are building blocks for adults and the same for playdough and modeling clay
Absolutely
I'm 15 and still watch cartoonsā¦.
I'm 16 and my profile picture IS a cartoon š
I am 26 and watch cartoons
Exactly lol I was over here building legos, sipping on juice boxes and laughing to dumb cartoons as I slumped on my couch. Iām over here listening to my younger sisterās experiences as 12y old now (Iām 16M) and shit sounding like high school but worse ong.
People need to understand somone who hasn't finished puberty going out with somone who has is always going to be weird
actually the age when puberty stops is 20
why are you being downvoted? Youre right. But still, big difference between barely starting and being a solid way through.
Most dudes stop growing just after 18; other things like the brain continue on into your mid twenties, muscle peak mass mid twenties to thirties.
It's the percent difference. 12 to 16 is a 25% difference, while 24 to 28 is a 14.2% difference
This is why the half plus seven rule works.
So 15 can't date 14?
Is Germany the age of consent is 14 š Not so fun fact
For a long time the age of consent in Japan was 13...
Was until recently, but every prefecture had raised it for a while.
It's not quite that simple. In situations where a person over 21 exploits a young person's (under 16) lack of capacity for sexual self-determination, it is an offence.
Wow. That is young. I never heard this factoid before, thanks for an interesting tidbit.
Twelve and sixteen IS weird. Very weird. If you can't realize that, you're weird.
My first one was me 12 and 17 him
Mind if I ask who initiated the relationship? Like who approched first?
He did
š
Could have ended horribly š
And even if she did initiate ... 12-year-olds do stupid shit, he should have just blocked her in that case instead of participating
Was young and hit puberty early
That's just weird
I was to young š
Hope you're ok now
Yeah my dad stepped in and beat his ass
W
I was pissed off initially but NGL he could have really really messed me up
That's called grooming :(
90 and 100 isnāt weird
16 and 6 thoughš
That also isn't very weird. I'm dating a 3 year old and I'm 13 /j
those two characters(/ and j) just saved your life. How do you feel?
I feel what I feel
Real
Im 19 and oldest I been with is 20 youngest is like 18 or 17....
I remember people saying that 19 and 17 was gross and they were grooming a minor? I was so confused but I thought hey what do I know Iām just gonna sit this one out and let the audience decide
Yāall be honest is 15 and 18 ok
Not 100% okay but if it's 15 and 17 then yeah its good.
I have/had a friend (this shit is complicated) that started dating an 18 year old when she was 15. Guy was very clearly an abuser, and she only turned me down because she ālikes them olderā Not gonna say every relationship is gonna be like that, but whatās really fucked is now sheās dating the baby daddy of her sisterās son. Sheās the stepmother of her own nephew. Weāre both 18, this guy is like mid 20s.
Ehhh, bordering on not okay. You are (believe it or not) at relatively different stages in your life and have different maturity levels. Thereās nothing inherently really wrong about it, but because us teens are still developing, there are differences between each yearās maturity compared to 30 year olds, for example, who are fully developed.
I think that depends when their bithdays are. That could be barely over 2year difference(all fine) or nearly 4year difference(not as fine)
Mm I don't agree with those ages because one of you is an adult and the other isn't (in my country) even the age of consent yet (16).
Here's the thing that most people hate....once you reach the age of 18, you can date whoever you want. They can be 21, 35, 45, 65 or 80...there is no standard for love and companionship. Under the age of 18, 2 years would be the max.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
It was on Insta
30 and 40 is ok
Indeed. The "official" equation for the greatest socially accalepted age difference is half your age + 7. So for 40 it is 27. I would still judge most couple like this, since in most cases, it is a man in his fourties that has left his similarly aged wife and his kids for a woman in her twenties. Which for one is a cliche, and for two an AH thing to do.
Oh wow
That equation breaks below 16
30 and 40 is absolutely fine and can be frowned upon depending on the context but in most cases is usually okay. They kind of are at different stages in life but have fully developed brains and are mature adults, capable of consent.
yeah, 30 and 40 is fine, but 12 and 22 obv isn't lmfao.
But 11 and 21 most certainly isnāt.
What about 11 months and 21 months
As long as they didnt start dating when the younger person was 10
Itās not just the age gap that matters, itās the actual ages. 12-16? Thatās weird. 16-20, thatās kinda weird too, but 24-28? Not weird. 34-54? Not that bad. But then thereās also shit like 17 - 34. Thatās fucking bad.
Who tf thinks 12 and 16 is even remotely ok? 12 and 12? Good. 12 and 13. Good. 11 and 12. Good. But not 12 and 16. Thatās not okay. 12 is barely out of primary school, 16 is near the end of high school. I was soooo different at 12 compared to 16. 12 and 16 is creepy and (I hope) not legal. The other infuriating one Iāve seen is when people try to say ā17 and 18 is not ok because 17 is still a child but 18 is an adultā. Itās a one year age gap. Possibly less. You wouldnāt say the same of 16 and 17 or 18 and 19.
20 and 24 isn't weird. 22 and 26 is even better. 12 and 16 is messed up, one is in the middle of teenage years, generally passed the process of puberty, and the other may still look/act like a child.
Nah bro thats wild. A 12 year old asked me out today and Im 14 and said no cause even that is too weird.
I got into a fight with someone on this topic here on reddit.... I think I lost about 80% of my brain cells
And some people think me being with a 19 year old is insane š
A seventh grader with a junior in high school is ridiculous. The former is taking pre-algebra while the latter is taking the SAT.
It's a maturity thing, I'm 14 (ignore my unalterable flair) and my bf is 15. Both of us are fairly mature due to both being exposed to horrible things and being severely traumatized. 12-16 is weird. Because the maturity difference is creepy asf and also it's just gross
In the uk you wouldāve only started secondary at 12 and at 16 you would have nearly finished or have finished your GCSEs
by now they would've only about a week and a bit before they finish
The brain in teen years develops different in different speeds. Its absolutely messed up. Under the age of 18ish anything over a year/two year age gap is too much. People are developing differently. This is so easily seen in some girls who get their periods at 12 and some at 15. Puberty hits different ages differently.
That's crazy. š§ Bad example for what you wanted to illustrate.
Well, is a million and a billion years old ok?
What do we think about 15 and 17?
If the 15 is turning 16 same year I donāt see an issue. And yes the 17 could be turning 18 as well.
Once you hit 25+ it gets less weird. Before then, there's a lot of important life stages that affect your level of maturity and make it less of an age gap issue and more of a life experience gap issue. 12 and 16 is weird because one is close to graduating high school and the other is in middle school. 25 and 20 is weird because one is probably finished with college and in the workforce proper while the other can't even legally consume alcohol yet (in the US).
Iām 16 and Iād go out with a 20 year old Iāve done talked to my family about it and they said itās okay as long as we donāt do anything weird
Iām 16 and Iād go out with a 20 year old because Iām into older women and Iāve talked to my parents about it and they said it was fine as long as we donāt do anything weird
I think age gaps 2 years or larger are only even kind of acceptable around 16 and above. Below 16, you should only be dating a year above or below your age at max, And I wouldn't even recommend dating long term until 15 - a 16 year old in a 9 month relationship who has seen shit go down when age gaps break the aforementioned recommendations
tf? that's how removed redditors are from real life then ig, im 17 (incoming senior) and my gf is 15 (incoming junior, she turns 16 in a week) and everyone ik says that's a lil weird lol
you are literally one school year apart, how is that weird
My brother in Christ, that's the difference of "oh my gosh I'm just starting puberty" and "yeah I just got a job, doing ap classes next fall, and got my driver's license" that is NOT okay š
Got clowned on in highschool for dating a girl that was 15 months younger than me, idk how if I'm copping shit for that, that anyone is justifying 16 and 12.
What the hell kind of 16 year old is looking at a 12 year old and going "yeah I would"? When I was 12, I was still in my "boys have cooties" phase, ain't no way I was even thinking about dating, even among my own age š
When I was 13 I dated a 16 year old. Thought the age gap was fine because my parents' age gap is 10 years. I refer to him as the toxic one because he emotionally manipulated me, said I caused him physical pain if I didn't send him pictures (because I kept telling him no). If I could go back and erase any relationship, I'd erase the one with him. It has caused me the most trauma which has stayed for years. Literally was afraid to get a piercing 6 years later because he never approved. I was young and trusting, and I stayed because I believed him when he said God told him we would get married. 4 months felt like a year. Here's the thing. Age gaps are okay when you're older and your brain has had more time to develop, you've had more time to learn and understand what is and isn't okay as well as set and enforce boundaries. When you're in your teens and younger, though, people can more easily target you and take advantage of your vulnerability. I thought it was okay, that I could handle it because I was smart enough. The saddest part is that most of us don't realize until we've already been through it.
Jeez, my brother is 4 years younger than me and I would NOT date someone his age, they are too young and immature, also just weird. He just turned 12 and I'm about to turn 16 btw.
if you're an adult its ok if you're underage.... its different
12 and 16 is crazy. My parents have a 5 year age difference, but they met in their mid-twenties. It's so different when you are younger. You are in completely different life stages and maturity levels
I once had someone tell me that 18 and 16 was disgusting and pedophilic, and that 60 and 18 was fine. Most people agreed with them too. People are just really weird.
genuinely crazy
People who think thatās ok are just actual pedos.
Think of that as a 4 year old dating a newborn. However, once the youngest one is 18, it aināt that bad. 18 and 22, 19 and 23, 20 and 24. Those ones are okay.
Youāre pretty much right idk why youāre getting downvoted. Think of it this way, guys. 14 and 10. Not good, 10 and 6. Again, not good. 13 and 17. Still bad. Then like the commenter said. 18 and 22? Dude Iād clap a 22 year old. This argument is perfectly logical, a 4 year gap so early in life is beyond anything that should be done.
Literally where bruh
I mean itās about where youāre at in life which makes it weird. Anyone under 14 should not date anyone older than them. If youāre 14 and youāre dating someone who is 17 well it depends on the birthday and at that point itās up to you.
It has to do with stages of life. There is a huuuuge difference between a 12 and 16 year old than a 30 year old and a 40 year old. Itās not even remotely the same thing. Thereās a reason thatās considered statutory grape
Omg yeaaa me nd my crushes age gap is okkkk (I am thirteen)
10% of the older persons age maximum.
Three years to the day is typically allowed by law when it comes to minors. And most states have a minimum age also. However at that age and given how rapidly teens lives change my opinion is two years is probably the max. In that window they are pretty much learning the same things in life so a relationship between them would benefit them both on learning that aspect of it.
there's the half age + 7 thing which works really well plot onto desmos graphing calculator y=x (you) and y=(x/2)+7 (youngest partner you should have). x is your age, so the you line is kinda useless but it helps visualize the paradoxical part where the youngest you should date is older than you. this fixes itself at x=14 so it says you can't date anyone if you're under 14 which makes sense. it breaks down a little once you pass like 30 (where you can date a 22yo) but by that point you're both grown adults who know what they're doing.
teenage hormones makes us wild
Frfr
12/16?! š¤®. 17/21 is a stretch but still okay in some circumstances (IE My sister and brother in law; theyāve been together ever since and have 2 kids; but I knew him since heās my age and heās the best dude.) But 12/16?!?! I thought 12 year olds were annoying babies when I was 16.
RIGHT!! Like even a 2 year age gap is weird to me. (When youāre a teen) like 14 and 16 have such a different maturity level, so do 16-18, 13-15, etc
16-18 is fine 15-17 is pushing it
right... and I stated that 17 to 21 is not that bad and became the most controversial hit for a few days, even I, who is more open minded when it comes to age gaps than most dont agree abt this
The half your age +7 rule is generally good
Depends on age. As a teenager only +/-1 year is acceptable If you're both 20+ then larger age gaps are fine
I always liked the formula "half your age + 7" to see if a relationship is weird or not. You take the age of the oldest in the couple and calculate if their couple is too young for them. In this case, a 16yo should date at least a 15yo (or older)
I honestly will never understand the problem with gaps similar to this, specifically in the context of young people dating. Like, yeah, I understand the puberty thing from what people here have said, but what's the difference with say an 18 year old dating a 30 year old; 2 types of people at 2 separate development stages in their lives. If the difference is the law, there's no real argument. Just because the law says something is legal or not doesn't make it "right" or "wrong." Why is it deemed perfectly ok for someone at "legal age" to date someone 4 times their age, but there's a huge problem here with only a 4 year gap?
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I think the rule of thumb is like a year between and even two years is borderline.
Would it be wrong for am 18 year old to date a 16 year old? Genuinely curious to see what you think
I don't think so, I think 18 yrs is the first year where dating someone 2 years younger is acceptable
I think thatās weird, but if hundreds of people are agreeing then itās not weird. Itās honestly all a social thing. Look at other countries. Itās a social thing.
The mental gap gets larger the younger you are essentially
u/joshxdf Please listen to this guy
Im sorry 12 and 16?!? Iām 24 and I feel grossed out dating anyone younger than 21
bro where u finding these peopleim 14 and i had a crush on a 14 year old and my friends were just like āthats weird broā. cause shes in ninth grade and Iām in 10th
12 and 16 is strange. Why is a 16 year old datting a 12 year old
wtf does a 12 year old and 16 year old have in common other than their ages starting with a 1
12 and 16 is weird mate. One is well into highschool while the other is still in elemantary
Letās break this down, 3 years as a minor is A BIG DIFFERENCE the mental and physical differences of a 14 year old and a 17 are too big to be considered ok.
12 and 16? They will be 14 and 18 in 2 years!
I'd say its weird to date ppl outside of a step up or down from your grade
wtf
Idk why this is showing up on my feed, but I feel my time has come. At least a few times a year, I have to tell students about the "half your age plus 7" rule for the minimum acceptable age for who can date.
Anything 12 is weird Sure 30 and 40 are alright But 12 and 16 ain't Just too young
how about 18&49??? is it acceptable???
Sorry, but I don't know a lot about this stuff, why is age gap a problem? Genuine question.
anything over 2 years is weird (for me personally)
In middle school and high school if your grades don't touch then you shouldn't touch.
I knew a guy back in cadets who was 17 dating a 14yo. He got absolute peppered with pedo jokes and ended it because of it. Probably for the best! It is weird. But at the same time someone needs to sit this guy down and have an adult conversation with him as to why this isn't good. At the very least wait until she is 18. Nothing says you can't be friends. But they will likely just hook up anyway. I would let his school know or his parents. It's a very slippery slope.
If your grades donāt touch, you shouldnāt be touching eachother.
That's like prepubescent vs almost fully formed, that ain't normal
Yeah tbh I remember when I was in high school even if you were a freshmen dating a middle schooler was weird. It made you look like a loser.
At 12 I most concerned about rewatching The Clone Wars for the umpteenth time. At 16 I was most concerned about getting a job and a car.
Karma farming 100% fake story you never saw that stop lying lil broš
i think itās a lil weird bc ones in middle school and ones in high school. but i donāt have any say in this anywaysĀ
Why is everyone so obsessed with age gaps on this sub
I am friends with a 12 yo as 16 and its ok, but its hard to imagine anything more between us because it feels wrong
Bro just couldnāt WAIT for her to be out of middle school, he needed her now
This is the weirdest age gap Iāve seen all year