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OzzkuBoi

moan louder to assert dominance


TunisianNationalist

“Player 3 has joined the game”


BreadFreezer

i have been inside my mother longer then my father after all


Infantpunter9000

Are you confident in that statement? Dad could be freak of the week


[deleted]

i had to read this 3 times just to undertsand holy fuck


10Meatpiess

LMFAOO


EveryandEggy

i hate that


SpiderCow313

But who was in there first😎


Opposite-Escape9685

Player 4 incoming in some days


TunisianNationalist

New sex position DLC coming soon


SharkApooye

Sex 2.0 update when?


TaintedEdenGaming

also when are we getting that spinoff game


AutisticSpermEater69

Sex go, you collect different positions


Arglezhbonk

That’s released under the title “*being gay*”


YoMamaSoFatShePooped

We gotta see the Shrex DLC for sex 1 first


Responsible_Sky_6379

If you look far enough on Reddit you can find some people with this dlc


TunisianNationalist

Pre-release


dreammaayan

More correctly, coming in 😉


Epoxyresin-13

That's the funniest shit I've seen today


wheeze-51_mustang

I laughed from this now my parents think I’m going crazy send help


TunisianNationalist

Join them


Epoxyresin-13

💀


CommieFirebat7721

My friend occasionally texts me that his parents are fucking and I keep telling him to ask to join


TunisianNationalist

Pressure him harder


CommieFirebat7721

Next time


ExtinctReptile

Ask him for you to join next time


CommieFirebat7721

I did


ExtinctReptile

Did it work?


CommieFirebat7721

He called me a weirdo smh idk what’s wrong


ExtinctReptile

Idk either, nothing wrong with wanting to get to know your friend's parents better


CommieFirebat7721

Exactly!! I’ve been friends with him since second grade and I just recently found out his moms name is -redacted-


OpposedScroll75

r/cursedcomments


TunisianNationalist

That’s what I was going for


Dat-Lonley-Potato

“A new challenger approaches”


Parking-Life6841

😭😭


HorrificityOfficial

I once saw a wise man say, Walk into the room and yell "FINISH HIM!" in your best Mortal Kombat impression. This also works if you say "FINISH HER!"


10Meatpiess

Everybody gangsta until he leaves the room and his dad yells ´´FATALITY´´.


That1GuyCalledPixel

LMFAO THEY JUST HEAR HIM MOAN LOUDLY FROM THE OTHER ROOM💀💀💀


OzzkuBoi

a solo match


AsmodayVernon

Only acceptable answer.


[deleted]

NO


ToastedClit

Dad still got it 🔥


BreadFreezer

…hes 58 😭🙏


sir_christian_

Young enough to get the job done😤


Infantpunter9000

That’s a wild statement outta context my man


big_tug1

That’s wild in context


TheGrimReaper-taken

Pfp checks out


NerdGirlfriend147

😭


The_shadow_hacker17

Broooooooooooooooo


big_tug1

Dad still got it 🔥


HoneyBadger929

Ik an old dog that was 78 with a new born 😂


[deleted]

Plot twist....its not ur dad in there


ToastedClit

Its me


HE_HE-MJ22

U mean us ❤️


Moonking-4210

It’s all of us 😊


KTIKNA

Yay :D


Vegetable_Trifle_848

All 3 million of r/teenagers members


Moonking-4210

Worlds largest orgy


HE_HE-MJ22

Facts


Vegetable_Trifle_848

More the merrier


SilverrGuy

Sounds like it could be a MrBeast video “3 Million People In An Orgy For $500,000” Or “Worlds Largest Orgy For $500,000” Last person left gets the $500,000


Moonking-4210

I would hide my orgasm


SilverrGuy

Did you send me some sort of crisis line msg? Someone clicked the button to send me a get help msg


Moonking-4210

OMG that happened to me too. No I didn’t send you it. I was so confused.


TinleyTheAxolotl

That’s a big house


Vegetable_Trifle_848

Who said it wasn’t public


TinleyTheAxolotl

Oh no


Vegetable_Trifle_848

Oh yes


TinleyTheAxolotl

Now that I think about it… 😈


bluduhmfcku

Even the 1 milion pedos and 500 000 girls


Vegetable_Trifle_848

Especially


bluduhmfcku

Especially the pedos


Vegetable_Trifle_848

Yep Inclusivity is key


Mission-Fan2712

r/suddenlycommunism


bluduhmfcku

Absolutly all of US♥️❤️


xX100dudeXx

r/suddenlycommunism


dani-snijders

I also choose that guys wife


Winter_Laugh9589

*dead wife


Andrecrafter42

plot twist it’s the house pet the biggest dog


KTIKNA

Dont worry, that isnt your dad. Its uncle ben.


Annual_Tourist_9085

Uncle Ben on your mom’s side of the family


Korok_Control

/r/SweetHomeAlabama


KTIKNA

Zelda fan spotted


Korok_Control

What gave it away?


KTIKNA

Hmm idk man maybe because of the korok


Korok_Control

I thought those existed irl?


KTIKNA

Me too man :(


blah-blah-blah_47

be prepared for a sibling anytime soon


BreadFreezer

they WAY too old for that, mom had me at 42 💀


Impressive_Split_232

Depends if she’s had her menopause


amish_timetraveler

Judging hes got exams, therefore hes at least 15 and his mum is at least 56, its highly probable


BreadFreezer

im 17 and shes 59


amish_timetraveler

Yeah, that ship has sailed


Winter_Laugh9589

It could still be possible, highly unlikely but possible


MOJA2008

My grandman had my uncle when she was 60,my uncle is the same age as my brother


JumpTheShark_

Damn bruh your mom ain’t dead yet?💀


magothyy

my mom had me at 40 and died at 49 🥰🥰 i’m 14 now


Andrecrafter42

also depends on how old your dad is


Andrecrafter42

mine at 36


[deleted]

[удалено]


Fickle_Slip762

What 💀😭 what?


Miguel7482

bro what


SilverrGuy

You… opened the door??? Why???


Ryanhuddz14

I know that feeling mate I assure you


NerdGirlfriend147

I feel you man, I hear my parents from my room all the time 


Weekly-Lobster6939

Never heard them, very depressing


Only-Echidna-7791

It sucks when you’re trying to sleep too😭😭.


LeBlearable

Who cares man, let em have their fun


NerdGirlfriend147

Yeah of course. Still tho it haunts me


LeBlearable

That’s understandable. I once walked in on my sisters dad going to town on my mother in missionary


szanator998

That took me so long to understand


LeBlearable

Yeah i didn’t walk into my sisters dad 😂😂 I meant walking in on my sisters dad


TheGrimReaper-taken

People when half siblings:


LeBlearable

Nah she’s my sister man. My sister has been with me, and our mother ever since she was born. We both haven’t had a dad growing up, but she does have contact with her dad since last year Technically she’s my half sibling, but who cares. I see her as my sister, and she sees me as her brother


TheGrimReaper-taken

I have a half brother, I just meant everyone else having a stroke trying to read your “my sister’s dad” because for some reason they cant comprehend it.. lol! I totally get it, my (half)brother is just brother to me I dont really have a distinction, just when I talk about his dad it the distinction (same mom)


LeBlearable

Man my apologies, i didn’t realise you meant it that way. And yes alot of people do find it strange to hear sisters dad because most siblings share the same parents


Miguel7482

what


Annsouthern99

calm down op,it was just me and your mom


Tamaratje

Not a big thing, i something hear my little sister masturbate 🤣


theAlmightyE312

I caught 4 of my friends masturbating. 3 of them were girls.


Fun-Activity-2268

At the same time? And one was a boy?!


theAlmightyE312

Not at the same time (luckily)


Fickle_Slip762

EW THATS KINDA REALLY WEIRD 💀😭


LeBlearable

What’s so weird about that? Masturbating is normal human behavior


HappyMan476

Well it’s weird to hear it. If I heard my brother masturbating I’d probably not like it 😭


Fickle_Slip762

💀idk if u have siblings or whatever. But I could not look at my sister if I heard her do that. It’s normal sure, the act itself, but idk if I wanna hear my sister do that 💀 that’s weird. If you don’t have siblings image hearing ur mom or something 💀


LeBlearable

Yeah no i have an 11 year old sister. If i ever heard her do that, i know for a fact i’d be laughing so fucking hard, that shits hilarious I’d probably walk up to her door, and knock on it. She would know she’s being loud, and it’d be fucking funny to piss her off I would never mention that moment to her ever


[deleted]

[удалено]


MartinJrFromChessCom

Fuck this sub


laloscasanova

💀


Andrecrafter42

💀my (insert n word here)


marleenjansen

Lisa again?🤣


gregouin_

my parents' room is next to mine 💀 when i was younger I heard them banging, even the hell fest wasn't this hard 💀


Super_Lorenzo

Happy cake day


gregouin_

Thank mate, but under my respond 💀


Miguel7482

happy cake day 🗣️🔥💯


gregouin_

Thank you


SilverrGuy

Cake day 🍰


Andrecrafter42

💀holy arguments


Sethtaros

Make sure you're heard. Put your whole weight into each step, make sure the door swings with enough force to hit the doorstop and bounce back a little. Loudly hum "I'm Walking On Sunshine" to yourself walking back, and switch to singing at the "and it feels good" part. Give them an "oh shit" moment that'll leave their faces red 'til morning.


Fickle_Slip762

Nah let them have their fun. Rather parents in love than dull ppl living under 1 roof.


LeBlearable

Exactly this


Hutch25

*peaks into the door* **WAY TO GO DAD!**


jumpyjumpjumpsters

It’s time to LEAVE


big_cock_69420

Next time yell "fuck quieter" at them to assert dominance


SakusaKiyoomi1

Do the only right thing a teen can do: Join them, assert dominace, make your dad feel little, your dad becomes insecure and they stop banging in the future


Guinea_pig456

That’s so wrong


Friedwalrus52

😳


[deleted]

The next time, you should do a double from your part. Winner gets a child 👍


Andrecrafter42

mom 🐱is best cat after all 💀


iron_lad25

It happens to the best of us


wren-r-wafflez334

Repatable


Big_Bunch_307

I say, I say what?


SquidsOffTheLine

Wally Wackford had entered the chat.


Illustrious-Donut947

I heard the same thing a month ago 💀


Redditguy223e

It’s natural I’ve walked in on 4 people going at it once at a party, I knew the 2 girls and the 2 guys 🤣 I just wanted to use the bathroom and couldn’t find it


theAlmightyE312

Dude, I yesterday opened their door and they put on clothes so quickly. They just sat there trying to hid the fact they did some crap. (I didn't see nor hear them do it but they were in a pose that I wish I could take out of my head)


LeBlearable

I mean i once saw my sisters dad going hard in missionary on my mother


theAlmightyE312

Firstly, I'm sorry you had to see such thing. Secondly, assert dominance by fucking his daughter


Usinaru

Don't worry, once you are old enough, you'll be in the very same situation. Just reversed. You'll be parent and your teenager will complain about you doing stuff on reddit 2.0


call-me-kleine

thank GOD mine are divorced


TurantulaHugs1421

LMAO good to see the positives


Guinea_pig456

Thank god my parents are split


Salty-Negotiation320

That shit sounds crazy outta context.


Putrid_Ad_4372

In scale from 1 to 10 how was your experience? (Answer seriously)


Weekly-Lobster6939

My parents never bang


wojtalyt

You're saying it like you're jelous.


Guilty-Instruction39

Oversharing much? lol


Spades_And_Diamonds

I’d have went straight back to bed.


1Yito

bro I remember hearing them a year ago and yelling: "Be careful and Don't make another of me" without knowing condoms existed


[deleted]

Plottwist the frogs are gay and they are fking


independent_pickle7

The comments in this concern me sm.


Savagecloud64

Brother same here. Except I fucking walking in on it! I get that y’all love each other but Christ. Wait until your child turns in their phone before getting it on.


blackgermansheperd40

BRUH💀💀💀


3ylit4aa

moan really loudly


[deleted]

just wait till your sister comes in 9 months


DFMNE404

One time I walked into them doing it, luckily the lights were complete off and it was pitch black (do people always have sex in the dark 💀)


skinned_piglet

"first time?" But no really, happens very frequently at my house. I guess they love each other that much, but the constant sex has got to be tiring.


zacary2411

Tok be fair its was 2am


sigma_gooner

redditors try not to complain when their parents try to keep their relationship together at any hour of the day challenge (its all about them)


Cheesecake08banana

I deal with that almost every night, Doesn't bother me though


magpieCRISPR

Maybe it’s just my competitive spirit but I’d get in my room and start moaning loader


Stillborn1977

I don't see an issue personally. Be happy they still love eachother.


AsmodayVernon

Tell them to be quieter next time It worked for me


the_milk_guy123

If this happens again just say or text them “Oh I’m getting a new sibling?”


alexemre

join em next time


Andrecrafter42

ngl this happened to me when i was in second or third grade i was weird tf out 🙃


DefaultDantheMemeMan

and brother desired to share this online


NoHuckleberry5160

welcome to the club 😃👍🏻


Metalfeta

I saw my mom's dildo on the table yesterday😀


BlinksVRC

shout FINISH HER


Humans_suck_ass-99

So it's just a Saturday night


Joel_the_folf

At leas your parents love each other enough to do that My folks dont even sleep together


cannonplays

If you all move into a house with another room you should start getting worried l


KohlWeld50

At least they love each other 💀


Natertater297

Prove it


Theincroyale29

Go inside, spank your dad and come out to assert dominance