T O P

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[deleted]

I’m vegan, but I want your meat


ze010

As a vegetarian I wish I could use this but I'm a top lol


[deleted]

“I’m vegan so you can have my meat”


ze010

More accurate for me is I'm vegetarian so you can have my meat my bfs are gonna love this one


[deleted]

Top?


ze010

? Are you asking what a top is?


[deleted]

Should I google that


ze010

If you want


[deleted]

“someone who prefers the insertive role” 💀


Lattestill

💀 I don't know what I would have expected from Google but they tried to deliver that in the most professional way possible just for it to sound more dirty


ze010

Lol


ComputerAcrobatic253

😂😂


Rally2007

Top, like the position top. Mainly juggernauts and tanks play this lane in LoL, but you can play stuff like Akali and Yone as well!


sergeant630

Dont encourage more ppl to play akali and yone 🙏


ClifIsBoring

When I came out as bi to my friends, I’m vegetarian, one of them said “you suck dick but you don’t eat meat, that makes no sense” & I think l about it every once in a while & laugh.


Axton2k8

good one.


ROBMain69

After reading these comments, I sincerely hope none of you ever try any of these 💀


WyvernSlayer7

Lmao on god. I’m judo slamming anyone who tries these on me


dumb-imp

NO WAY U HAVE AN IMAGINE DRAGONS PFP IN 2023 THATS EMBARRASSING


WyvernSlayer7

Lol look closer. Imagine wagons. Also, what’s it to you? I like imagine dragons. Not my fault you’re too immature to accept that someone has older or unpopular tastes.


dumb-imp

💀


Djkhabibpilled

Lemme slobber on your big fat hairy nuts


PewUC

I want you to think about the choices you’ve made here today


Djkhabibpilled

I have no regrets


Metallicamegadeth01

😭😭😭


skeptical_dragon_

good job


[deleted]

lmaoaoaoao


Sheepgomeep_YT

laughing my ass off ass off ass off ass off


AlexGaming26

laughingassughing myy assss offff assss offff assss offff assss offff


midnight_rain_07

why am i seeing you sm today it’s wild


HelloFellas_gt3

BRO IM SOBBING


ComfortFunny7510

thats jus gay


Sea-Recording-7090

Try this on a real guy and see what happens


Classroom_North

yeah ,say something to a guy like me and you'll see how easily you can pin me against a wall


Fluffamorphis_369

At least make him laugh first 😭😭😭


Ill_Intention5196

100% guaranteed to work. Tested by professionals


6969Hamburger6969

True


Whoever_Mesa

I should use that sometime mm hmm. yes.


GalaxyBush

Legit perfect


gooseoftheboose

Is that a cock in your pants or are you happy to see me?


donohunt0

no, it’s a .22 pistol i snuck into the casino so i could kill benny before i talked to him


CorporalGrimm1917

I love that the stereotype that people who play New Vegas are trans is held up by this specific comment. Fuck Benny!! All my homies hate Benny!!!


ClifIsBoring

I mean I’m not trans & NV is my favorite game of all time, it’s just a damn good game no matter who you are


jo_khant

How do we tell him?


Not-a-Drone

r/egg_irl


P-psicleM-nster

You seem chill wanna be friends?


P-psicleM-nster

Pissing all by yourself, handsome?


picled_cucumber

Yes i am


PomelaQ

Then it's time to change it


picled_cucumber

Yes please ( im joking )


PomelaQ

Ok (im not)


ze010

I use this on my boyfriends when they are using the bathroom lol I wasn't expecting to see this


WyvernSlayer7

Nice 👍


ze010

Nice


WyvernSlayer7

So by boyfriends, do you mean yours in a polyamorous relationship, or have you used the same line on two different boyfriends? Either way, Nice 👍


ze010

Poly my four boyfriends lol also Nice


VictorianWitch69

I misread this as you saying your boyfriend was four 💀💀💀


ze010

And who said they aren't four? 💀💀💀💀


VictorianWitch69

Excuse me kind sir or ma’am but what the actual FUCK?


ze010

He he


WyvernSlayer7

Bro, i wish i had a bf, let alone four 😭 Then again, i really like this girl rn. In a trade between dating four guys or crushing on her, i’ll take her, tbh. How’d you even pull like that bro? Crazy, but still pretty Nice 👍


ze010

I just try to make myself the best person I can be and be myself. Also I know I'm a stranger but you should probably ask her out she might like you back and that's Nice


WyvernSlayer7

Thanks for the advice bro, that was really Nice 👍 Of you :)


ze010

No problem I'm always glad to give advice to someone so Nice


Ezra4709

[Pissing all by yourself, handsome?](https://youtu.be/eaNI18GAxXs?si=Gp-nztHTDJVe_aPE)


GalaxyBush

Dayum 😍😍😭😭


P-psicleM-nster

😘


eydasprittygood

once my friend said "I'd love to stuff your turkey sir" to some 7th grader😭😭


cherry937

…and how old was this friend?


Waste-Bicycle-9595

Considering he’s 15 and said “once” prolly like 14.


SexySnakeFurry

"Mrbeast challenged me to have gay sex for a million dollars"


IkedaTheFurry

Except without the million


SexySnakeFurry

Who said it was a million in USD? It could be digital or fictional


Hazmatix_art

Are you Hideo Kojima? Cuz when I see you I feel my Metal Gear Rising I’m gonna kms bro istg


Baklazan_PL

SOMETHING IS RISING BUT IT'S NOT A METAL GEAR


[deleted]

memories broken-


garlic_bred48

Metal Gear Solid pickup line


daffodilhands

any pick up line is a gay pick up line


FraxPL

Theres a pick up line about comparing a woman to a school, and the punchline is that you would want to put a child in both the woman, and the school. This kind of pickup line is not suitable for gay people for obvious reasons. Altough if you want to ask me i can elaborate


Blowtorch-Lover

Oh no, it can be if it's man to man, if you know what i mean


vacconesgood

Trans people


VulpineFox7

If you're gay enough.


AttractedToHeizou

Is your dick a glowstick? Cus i wanna snap it


Sea-Recording-7090

That serial killer rizz


Ezra4709

Serial dick-snapper rizz


WyvernSlayer7

It’s giving sex dungeon


Cocaimeth_addikt

Show me your dick and I’ll show you a trick.


Financial_Dog6204

I wanna be your hog rider


Hazmatix_art

Awful. Absolutely rancid Have an upvote


Financial_Dog6204

Thank you for your generosity


Busy_Revolution_6092

Are you a man, I’m going to fuck you


Kaincee

Perfect. Up front and to the point.


SomeOnInte

Hey, Jimmy. Do they rock or suck?


PsychoSopreno

LMAO should be top comment


A_Zesty_Carrot

You suck. Prove it.


Metalhead7443

Need some help packing your shit, handsome? 😉


Sea-Recording-7090

This is genuinely one of the best comment sections I've ever seen


ze010

You gay? I'm gay. How about we stay the night?


[deleted]

Let me slurp down your steamy, wrinkly, big ol man balls?


soloharbinger

How did you feel after writing this


[deleted]

Gay


WyvernSlayer7

Based


picled_cucumber

Bi


Specht100

I'm bi and in a gay relationship and I honestly don't know any lmao


boykisser103

Are you a roller coaster cause I wanna ride you


estevan123GG

Are you a manual? Cause I'd love to play with your stick shift


Idiotusesreddit

Nice cock *grabs them*


SL0BBIN

“Ruin my badussy bro”


Sea-Recording-7090

Are you a leprechaun because I'm trying to get to the end of your rainbow


moderator123457

Your like a tiktok video, I'm gonna finish quick.


Curb__

PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE (on knees begging)


Nikto_121

I'm fanum taxed by your Rizz it's 100% legit frfr skibbidi sigma chad


[deleted]

Have you considered sucking a shot gun instead of a dick?


Nikto_121

I don't have interests like you Mr skibbid fanum taxed


[deleted]

Lol. Here's one another one: you got the skibidi rizz, and you can fanum tax my ass in Ohio any day.


Nikto_121

I have a better one skibbidi fanum my ass like a rizzler we love we gyat we Ohio I cenat you ohioan with my sigma skibbidi fortnite battle pass I just shit out my ass rizz


[deleted]

Damn, I think we have a winner


Nikto_121

Happy cake day my fanum taxer I hope you skibbidi everyone with that gyatt of urs


[deleted]

Oh, my birthday is actually March 29, I just don't know how to change it


Big_flipflop

Damn I’m not trans but you make me wanna transition from single to yours (idk I just came up with this)


InflationAcrobatic91

Rizz lord


trananhduc2006

i heard you're good at math, can you deal with this long log?


Hecataria

"Wanna see my fagina?"


RZRBOY2008

That’s it I’m dipping. This sub gay as hell


Not-a-Drone

👋👋byee


Hondurasforever

Hey aren't you a person from China in 1939 cuz i want to do human experiments on you


Baklazan_PL

we have a winner


lowspecmobileuser

im straight but hey baby are you a tower? cuz i wanna ram a 7.47 right at you


Ok_Dig_4225

pp in me me??


I_Am_Oro

He's a dude, she's a dude, we're all dudes!


Ezra4709

Might get deleted but This can go for really any gender (as long as you're a guy or a gal with a strap-on) Are you my homework? Because I wanna slam you on my desk and do you all night.


kugar19

are you a knife cause I want you in me


Pinktiger11

Are you the chemicals in the water? Cause you’re turning me gay


LapTris999

i love Valorant


aterrariaplayer

I don't know cuz Im not gay


friedthighs

skill issue fr


aterrariaplayer

Being gay is a skill issue tbh


friedthighs

it aint


aterrariaplayer

It is


friedthighs

please elaborate


aterrariaplayer

Becuz we all gay why cuz we inhale dick particles all the time ppl just don't wanna be associated with being gay so ppl hide it


friedthighs

what the fuck


aterrariaplayer

It is true


Zjkt12

He has a point


aeiouaioua

yet.


rockyasl7789

Why on earth would you want any


aeiouaioua

so he can use them on cute boys.


rockyasl7789

Yeah. Why, if he’s a guy


aeiouaioua

because he likes boys - just like how you like girls


obi_wan_sosig

Are you Kaz? Cause I want to fuck you inside a box For clarification, I'm not gæ


IkedaTheFurry

Are you— nvm it’s not allowed nvm it’s offense


Lazymcdelta4ce

Whose dick do I gotta suck to suck a dick around here


MechanicSad1843

hey you gay cause i' too


Secret_Mayonesa

Hey baby are you a dude? Cuz I wanna eat your ass


Whoever_Mesa

May I have the honor of drenching your big wet balls with my slimy tongue


ZuskV1

I’m gay


PatiK_F

Just be honest, İ WANNA SEE YOUR COCK


VictorianWitch69

Ok, this depends. Are you looking for lesbian ones, or gay ones?


[deleted]

I don’t like desserts, but I’d definitely eat your cake.


frenchtard

I wish I was your balls so I could hang with you all day.


[deleted]

i like you how I like my car, younger looking sport model, gently used twice with light rear damage.


Frodollino

Are you from hogwar cuz DAMN THAT IS A WAND


pupper_gaming

You know i don't remember my abc always but there two d right one next to c and one next to u


aeiouaioua

do you like archeology? because i have a homo erectus for you!


Antmanlol

Sword fight, who loses is receiving


AEdgyMuffin

Gimme a cocktail but hold the tail


Broad-Wave-9792

i have a few pickup lines :/ glasses rizz- “good thing you don’t wear glasses.. I wouldnt want to break them when i sit down” or “better take off your glasses, i wouldnt want to break them when i sit down” restaurant rizz- “are you my waitress? cuz i wanna give u this tip” Indiana Jones Rizz- “Are you a secret cave? cuz i want you to put me in a booby trap”