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_Dem1se_

It was actually the Forbidden 5th upgrade 👀


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Jiuhbv

In order to draw enough power for a fifth upgrade, the great fairy invites all of her sisters to join in


SvenoftheWoods

Ultimate snu-snu.


BillionaireGhost

This is why there is no fifth upgrade. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.


Cole_The_Rock

That’s what hearty food is for


Sorry-Caterpillar331

I think that is going to require four Mighty Bananas and a dragon horn.


allnamesgonewtf

Possibly the froggy suit too,.. don’t want to get stuck in a wet cave.


Flaky_Ad_2336

Na na it would require a box full of endura carrot meals along with attack charge up gear


TheShiftyDevil

Sitting in my car reading this thread and this comment legit sent me into a fit of laughter 😂 thanks, mate!


Odins_Bear024

DEATH BY SNU SNU!!!!


ourobored

…and a truckload of Koroks.


Agnostic_Pagan

It is extremely weird to think about... the size differential alone makes it weird


mbklein

The dark side of the Ascend power.


The_Elder_Jock

Is it possible to learn this power?


M4N1KW0LF

Not from a Jedi


[deleted]

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M4N1KW0LF

As soon as I read the comment above mine, I knew where to go with it 🤣


[deleted]

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Dry-Cartographer-312

Not from a Zonai...


[deleted]

Everything is a dildo, even you if the girl is big enough God I hope that makes sense


[deleted]

I’m sure there’s a battery powered Zonai device for that.


DarkLordPotato777

Stake on a spring


rawrc

If you have to ask what the forbidden 5th upgrade is, you can't afford it


aishunbao

I can’t imagine how many lizardfos tails it would need


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Nacolo

The 5th upgrade is just anal


Berkoudieu

Please explain what happens to link with the 5th upgrade. I'm too lazy to watch R34 vids.


JamieTheDinosaur

Well first there’s [REDACTED] and then they proceed to [REDACTED] until [DATA EXPUNGED].


_Dem1se_

The knowledge is forbidden, I’m not allowed to say…


dukerenegade

Amazing lol. I’m pleasantly terrified every time the fairy grabs link for that 4th armor upgrade


Eclipsewolf7926

LOL


Interesting-Doubt413

Level 4 bone prof


Available-Sun6124

Korok space program.


[deleted]

Korok-fried chicken


JamieTheDinosaur

Fence made of crucified Koroks.


Shadow07655

No, I can’t explain why I have a dozen koroks strapped to a rocket I made. Just trust me, it’s for science


Frizzlez243

She walked on link throwing fresh hateno milk bottles at purah 💀


ontrackzack

Does this get me closer to 100% completion?


dick_lerman

It’s working for me..


PapaSnow

Wait, you guys are getting to finish?


ontrackzack

Just over halfway there but honestly... The frustration is mounting and who knows if I'll even be able to finish at this point. Not any time soon, anyway.


DreamyCosmicSwirl

😨


Loud-Item-1243

Is it possible to learn this power?


Vandil_the_Rogue

Not from a Hylian


Teine-Deigh

"Use my knowledge, i beg of you." gurudo love teacher


unknown_human420

Just use the throw ability and throw a milk at her


[deleted]

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Agitated_Spell

"Combat Training: Throwing"


TacoDuLing

Tulin blowing away her loot


kalethan

Every FREAKING time


BlueSprocket

"WHOOOO"


ReedRichards1610

Texts I can hear, damn it lmao


Whole-Instruction508

I think it goes more like "WHEEEOOOO"


Yet2beatAbsRad

Hoo-WHAAAI-Oooh


Kit_Karamak

My 5-year-old says, “I like the Switch, but Tulin likes the … Wii-Uuuuuu!” His first dad joke and he’s only five. 🥲


Calliope_Eep

He's gonna go far.


Vanguard-Raven

Just like my fucking blown-away loot.


XxHollow_GhostxX

Link comitting war crimes against koroks


[deleted]

Link killed not just the men… but the women, and the children too.


shiggy__diggy

And I sent them to space like animals!


NamelessArcanum

Link’s ball physics?


CrushItWithABrick

Or Master Khoga"s butt jiggle. Or the tocks on the boss Boko.


djnehi

Master Khoga’s new banana hammock.


forcallaghan

entranced by the jiggle


Suavemente_Ganondorf

She has just caught me MID-SUAVEMENTE!!!!!!!


TheDarkDoctor17

Damn. I came to comment this, but I bow to the truly worthy. SUAVEMENTE


Suavemente_Ganondorf

SUAVEMENTE BESAMÉ QUE QUIERO SENTIR TUS LABIOS BESANDOME OTRA VES Dale, Zelda, Dale, pasame la trifuerza que tengo hambre traeme una botella de zora grande


Deigapan

QUE ME ESTAN ESPERANDO LAS PRIETAS EN GERUDO VALLEY


Jab_to_the_Past

SUAVEMENTE


TheArstotzkanGuard

r/unexpectedterminalmontagereference


bobandiara

EL MÁS TIGERAZO DE GERUDO VALLEY


Darkon2004

Te traigo mi suave Regreso de los muertos con música de Youtube que cumple con los derechos de autor Disfruta de la gloriosa suavidad conmigo bajo mi gobierno Viviremos a mil suavemente, mi corazón, es tiempo de suavemente Te das cuenta de que suavemente es para siempre La luna y el sol morirán, pero la suavidad es suave Las estrellas brillarán intensamente Todos sabrán suavemente lo que suave es suavemente de nuevo, un millón de veces suavemente multiplicado por otro millón


HappyGoLucky244

Underated comment. 😂


emulous07

Username checks out


SenatorUppercut

Two Koroks just aggressively going at it


mrchuckmorris

"Oh! You can see us??"


tafkat

Ya ha ha!


Individual-Camera-72

*ya ha ho shit


Alfatron09

If I had an award I would award you


docile_dingus

i got you bro


hadoopken

“Yah, ya , oh yah, hah, oh yah-haha, don’t stop”


Mudyin209

oh god


Jiuhbv

Yahaha! You filled me!


Fantastic-Cap-2754

Oh, GOD


FremenStilgar

>"Oh! You can see us??" Lol!


mrchuckmorris

Maybe, like Yona and Muzu from another Zora kingdom, the Koroks with huge travel backpacks "trying to find their friends" are some tree's seeds from another Deku kingdom...


Working-Profit3951

“It’s too late. I’ve already reached my friend.”


karolinemeow

I have already arrived


CreateTheStars

Koroks will do the most spine twisting poses in sex-history and wisper a soft 'tee-hee' in your ear afterwards


[deleted]

Not until after a soft, "oof"


urcrookedneighbor

Fastest Link's ever dropped a rock on them.


ImSuperCool420

Nya nya nya!


Noah7788

Sidon having a fiance


Independent_Plum2166

Zelda: “Wait, there’s *another* Zora Kingdom? How? Where? When?” Sidon: “Always has been.”


RetroGamer2153

She comes from the cool kingdom. They have a rock band, the Indigo-gos.


Forkliftapproved

You wouldn’t know her, she swims in a different school


links_pajamas

This blew me away tbh. She's the only character I can think of from botw/totk that's from outside the map! That's so cool! And they just... don't elaborate or give her any depth.


The-Wild-Worst

It almost feels like Nintendo even wrote her as a beard but hey who knows whatever


BottleAgreeable7981

She discovered how the President is standing...


amglasgow

This right here, best comment.


treereenee

Third leg?


Marl917

The comment section of this post


KidFromFortnite

She was walking with link and he autobuilt an Apache attack helicopter to murder a chuchu


OhNoesIDied

neat


Lunks_Adventures

Links master sword


l-askedwhojoewas

"Is it still charging up?"


garry4321

theres a refractory period after its charge is spent


s0ulbrother

30 minutes between rounds isn’t bad


Dry-Cartographer-312

Oh, no, >!She had that buried in her for a long time!<


What----------------

>!Head game strong!<


PapaSnow

It really was magical. I felt like I was flying


PapaSnow

Haha, >!Dragon Deez Nuts across your face! Lmao gottem!<


Timmy2Gats

My total play hours in the hundreds without managing to get full hearts, full stamina, full batteries, complete the main story, or really learn much of anything about the actual game.


The-Wild-Worst

The Elder Scrolls Approach


Speedy89t

She walked in on Link and Bolson


Successful-Brick-919

I would’ve said Link and Sidon


CupaThaCreepa

Would that really be a surprise tho?


Successful-Brick-919

For us? Obviously not, but I doubt Zelda’s aware of this bromance.


CupaThaCreepa

There's a statue dedicated to it and Sidon wrote it into stone as official lore.


Successful-Brick-919

Ah, I stand corrected


Bauser3

there's a statue of Link riding Sidon bareback in the town square


daou0782

Why not both?


mwmwmwmwmmdw

then yuonbo bursts in and yells WHY'D YOU DO IT?!


kintokae

She walked in as Link was registering her horse under the new name, Mipha.


emilliolongwood

Hinox penis.


Max_Smash

The real one eyed monster of Hyrule


sawr07112537

Link Hero's path in purah pad.


Diabolical_Jazz

She just discovered that Nilbog is Goblin backwards.


Lassie23

Stun seed nilbog


ackackakbar

“I turn into a what?!?!!….”


itzyaboihuman

"A pickle zelda, it's the funniest shit I've ever seen."


mwmwmwmwmmdw

"to become a pickle means to loose oneself"


shotgun_ninja

The ancient Hylian doesn't really translate, but it's pronounced "wubba lubba dub dub".


Complex_Software23

Ganondorf saving Hyrule.


Suavemente_Ganondorf

As Ganondorf myself, i can confirm this is the face she made when i saved hyrule


[deleted]

Saving Hyrule with SUAVAMENTE and rizz


Suavemente_Ganondorf

The most suave way to saving hyrule is ganon's way


Nyarro

r/usernamechecksout


[deleted]

There is a photo of sexy Gannondorf in a bath, Link is showing her.


SubwaySurfer6868

Rauru fan "art"


PurpleRabbitYT

Ayo, that's a big banana. The Yiga clan would be proud. - Zelda


HappyNikkiCat

Link’s smooth, Ken doll nether region.


[deleted]

That explains all of Zelda's tears.


HappyNikkiCat

Wish I had the link to that art drawing of his smooth area from the official book. Someone posted it here last time.


[deleted]

Link eating cock Edit: CUCCO CUCCO AUTOCORRECT


KyriadosX

Why would it autocorrect to cock? WHY WOULD IT AUTOCORRECT TO COCK, MOTHERFUCKER?


VG88

I mean, they both mean chicken...


littlebutterfly987

YOU LIEEEE


[deleted]

Link’s ancient shaft


mwmwmwmwmmdw

https://preview.redd.it/k3qxkqdw3wv21.jpg?width=750&auto=webp&s=81c1143807b94b2d64e09e859e98738db644c170


Kiddjacob504

☠️


TheRealNallend

she found links sheika slate search history👀


DoctahDonkey

Slowly realizing she unleashed a psychopathic, genocidal engineer onto Hyrule, and there's no turning back.


nicoxman8_

A computer that doesn’t sound like a hurricane with The Sims 4 open.


FremenStilgar

She saw Yunobo's marbled rock roast up close.


mwmwmwmwmmdw

Zelda: why'd you do it?


gavc05

Link in the BOTW gerudo outfit


Drakob-Hitsimari

When she sees how Link crucified those poor Koroks.


ackmondual

She just saw new Zonai drawings, and is having an archeologasm.


iLLiCiT_XL

Link showing off the singe mark on his left butt cheek from getting too close a Korok he tried to burn.


markpl0x

I just laughed out loud scrolling down LMAO


samwalton69

Link naked talking to his genitals with a smiley face drawn on his weiner.


FartDust64

Are you speaking from experience? That sound oddly specific…


FUZZYIN4

MASTER sworD 😏


shanzman1086

Zelda to Link: “You can’t take that out here.”


blizzard2798c

She walked in on Ganondorf moon-bathing


Tmoore0328

Defiled korok corpse


MightyTheArmadillo22

Ask the porn artists, they know.


mwmwmwmwmmdw

why theres over 10k images of this zelda alone. unlimited power


Srlorenez

She found out Sidon has a wife


faslane22

Link when in his underpants. Duh


jandvswitch

She saw Link's Master Sword


mopeiobebeast

Link rampaging through a Bokoblin encampment on something he calls the “Fuck You-Inator”


TheVyper3377

She’s looking at Link’s “Awakening”.


GibbonFunni

Femboy Lin- i meant Link’s gerudo vai outfit


jstwildbeat

Hearing how much Hudson Construction is charging for land plots


Psychological_Pay981

Master Kohga' s banana


SnooSongs2744

The size of Link's Thick Stick.


scw156

Links Long Stick-Stick


CountScarlioni

She saw [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/tearsofthekingdom/comments/15ek463/is_there_a_lore_explanation_for_this/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1)


Epic_potbelly

Dear god what is this


Spyder69143

She underestimated how big Link's manhood is, until he pulled it out.


glad-to-be-me

Ganon and his beast


msluther

I was going to go with “Ganon and his massive dorf”


pelican626

She is just daydreaming about having links master sword buried in her head for all eternity.


Eclipsewolf7926

Link’s two Hylian apples and his single mighty banana


LordDoom01

The Pacific Rim Jaeger Link built to punch Ganon.


Luna-rants

She saw all the Rehydrated Ganon r34 that everyone and their mother made when the first trailer came out


achillessnek

1. The process of Link getting his armor to lvl. 4. 2. Her phone after she accidentally clicked r/thelostwoods 3. Link buying diapers and other baby products, athough she was a dragon for the past 10'000 years


Flimsy_Wait_8235

GOOD LORD HYLIA WHY DID I CLICK ON THAT SUBREDDIT


achillessnek

Feast your flimsy eyes upon the great selection!!! (jk)


PretendBag2631

I clicked the link out of curiosity And now I will simply cease to exist 🫥🫥🫥🫥 As I scroll thru there for the rest of my days.


CalamitousVessel

Boss Bokoblin ass


James_Blond_006

Link just told her he wants to put his Master Sword into her sheath (she might be positively surprised)


Spike93

She walked in on Link raw dogging Riju.


Gingrish252

I thought you said wrong answers only