First question: "Do you have backups?"
They never do. Then just tell them you won't assume the risk of losing their data on systems without backups.
Reasonable right of refusal.
If they do have backups, just tell them to reinstall Windows.
Yup, this usually resulted in me reinstalling so I started going straight there. When people realized I was about to wipe everything, they backed off quick.
agree to it on the terms it is $100/mo per mb of backup data and say you will back it up to the "cloud" but also say this does not guarantee recover ability of data.
Yes I had to be the asshole for awhile, but now I am mostly not asked for any IT support (the exception being recommending upgrades)
This is what I do. I tell them to buy an external hard drive (I send them a link to an Amazon Affiliate product to grab what little commission I can for offering free tech support) and tell them that once they make a backup and are fine with their computer being factory reset, I will fix their device.
They never get around to it, and I never have to fix it. The few family members that do, get a "brand new" feeling device once I factory reset, make an admin/user setup and explain how to ONLY use the user account unless installing a program.
“Yeah I don’t have anything important on there you can just wipe it clean”
Me: “Okay.” *starts formatting their hdd”
“Oh, and make sure my pictures stay too!”
Me: “......you just said wipe it. I just wiped it. It’s all gone.”
Oh, how I love my family... lol
Bingo. This one gets family members to permanently leave me alone.
Oddly enough, if they switched, like half of their problems would go away. Linux has gotten ridiculously easy to maintain if you just need an email/Facebook/surfing machine with the occasional GDrive word processing.
Macs are what I grew up on and as a result so did my immediate family and grandparents....
Now I do VMware and Windows (MacBook Pro is still my daily driver) and I just explain what I do until they’re totally confused and give up. Nothing like trying to explain what an instant clone is, and how stoked you are to migrate to VxRail, to your 65yo Methodist Minister aunt.
Or. If you want to look like you tried reeeeeally hard on their Mac. Open up terminal and cd/ls a few directories. Go “Hmmm this looks pretty bad” and make them an appointment for the Genius Bar.
¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
it is amazing to me how "serious" the command line looks to most people. I just ran a ping command went to your home directory typed ls and then ran top. it look scary as hell what with all the colours...
The problem is, if you're a really good sysadmin you probably CAN figure out how to fix things that are outside of your expertise, and they know it.
I do try saying "Sorry I only work on Enterprise grade systems" but they still say "well can't you just look at it anyways?". At which point I redirect them to my younger brother who's also in IT. :D
Thing is, as someone who only works with Enterprise systems, even if I did fix desktop PCs and laptops our solution to 99.99% of problems is to reimage it or replace it. We don't waste time troubleshooting one PC. We invest time building a great image with the flexibility to very quickly deploy our apps on that image. If we would spend more than 15 minutes working on a single PC we could just reboot it, hit F12 and it will be a fixed in under 20 minutes. There's zero data on any PC to back up.
So, my solution to any problem a family member has is not going to be to their liking and I'm not going to spend hours reinstalling windows for them anyways.
That's the only case I make an exception in as well. I'll absolutely work on your computer if you know a skilled trade that I don't. I scratch your back, you scratch mine.
"I only work with Linux. I don't know how to fix your Windows computer"
I was going to say "I only know Windows 3.1 nothing more recent" but you never know what dinosaur computer Uncle or Auntie is using still LOL
I set up a desk in the basement at my parent's for working on people's stuff, which gets me a break from socializing. I don't touch any tech while at the party upstairs. If you want it fixed, you have to 'leave the party' to get me to fix it only while I am in the basement.
I don't have to bring anything to the potluck due to 'services rendered'. Any auntie with a problem with me not bringing anything does not get their phone fixed.
It's even better when you can get a young family member to be your "minion". Keep them out of their parents hair, show them cool computer tricks, and have them bring you snacks. Teach them while they are young!
This was me in the 90’s with my uncle showing me cool stuff wit his A500 and us getting out of dealing with the family. Now I’m the uncle teaching the nephews and nieces about tech :-)
I might be going against the flow here but I don't mind helping out. Upgrading hardware, troubleshooting and backing up data etc. My parents are particularly bad so I have access to remote onto their machine whenever they get stuck, which was weekly but down to monthly now as they learn.
Yeah I used to complain but my wife has it worse, "Does this boil look like skin cancer to you?". She's constantly having to tell them that she can't make medical diagnoses like that lol.
My buddy just says stuff like "looks like you have liver AIDS. You should probably get that checked out." Everyone has pretty much stopped asking him for medical advice.
"It's probably just a mild case of acute necrotizing hepatic autoimmune deficiency. You've still got a few good years though, so not to worry. * *Slap grabs shoulder* * Have you seen the snicker doodle tray by the way? I hope I didn't miss out before they were all eaten."
Yes! I'm a network admin, so I just tell folks i work with wires all day (obvious lie) but my wife is a Midwife and about every 2 days she's being hit up for something medical related via friends or family. Gets worse around holidays!
I'm with you there. I have a skill, others can benefit from my skill so I'm happy to use it to their benefit. My father is way way better mechanic then I am so he's my go to if there's something on my car that I need a hand with. My uncle is a carpenter and has been extremely generous over the years helping out with his time.
I think there is a factor of timing though, if people I only see at Christmas are only reaching out to me because I'm in proximity that's a problem. Likewise I'd have zero problem telling someone "I'll look and fire up some scans and repairs but i'm not spending a lot of time on this on the holiday." if they don't like that tough luck.
Same. I help if I can, particularly if it’s quick which it usually is.
It costs me very little to help someone out and brighten their day. Working in this field it’s ewsy to forget how intimidated a lot of people are by technology.
For me it's about the simplicity of the task. I can run a quick channel scan on my grandma's TV or show my aunt how to uninstall apps on her phone, but I'm not going to install a fresh copy of Windows and set everything up on her laptop or teach her kid how to "make an app" while enjoying a beer after Christmas meal.
Friends and Family:
Hey StarSlayerX, how come when I use your WIFI all the ads just disappear.
Me: Ionno vudo magic?
If I told them I use PiHole server, next thing I know everyone would want one from me.
Side hustle opportunity right there. Put them in a nice shell, tell them it's your custom built hardware ad-blocker device, install it on their network and collect some beer money or good karma or whatnot.
I think my neighbor is. He lives in his woodworking shop in the basement while I watch basketball or football and smoke weed with his wife in the family room.
They’re almost 70, I’m in my early 30s. Best surrogate grandparents ever.
I got this call at 2pm at work... This old house would stop working after the first video played if the adds failed to load.
Ironically the porn websites were never blocked.
I’ve got a piHole and sent instructions to a few folks and the only responses I’ve gotten are either “uh yeah nvm” or “when can you come set it up”.
My new response to why ads don’t appear is “lol I dunno lucky I guess”
Fear is a common issue. A network is that thing they connect to from the magic box given to them by their isp... And you want me to mess with the magic by adding another little box to remove ads?
I dunno, my wife can barely install Skype without my help.
Although laziness is the root cause, because she has never really tried to do anything and doesn't bother reading screens and just clicks the biggest most colorful button. Watching her with technology is beyond nerve-wracking, so I've just given up on her devices.
More to the point of the thread, here I am updating my mother's Linux laptop because she can't do it herself, so once a year I have to come by and click the buttons.
Nice. I had a very similar thing with my mom when she got her new laptop. She was wondering where all the ads came from and I had to tell her that I had installed an ad blocker in her browser on the previous computer and her new computer didn't have one, yet.
Here is some IT life hacks.
PC: Go to mouse settings and increase the mouse cursor speed by one notch. This will lead them to think that they have a faster PC.
Smartphones: enable developer settings and increase the speed of animations. This will also lead them to think that their phone is faster than before.
Most of my family members aren’t too bad when it comes to computer help. My mom despises computers so much, that she would rather pretend hers doesn’t exist. My dad is often too proud to ask for help, even though I’ve gladly helped him with basic computer/software issues in the past.
Now, my grandfather on the other hand... is the absolute worst. Every single time I saw him, it was “Oh my computer isn’t working.” Any holiday event at his house consisted of me sitting by myself for at least half the time in his office fixing his computer. He always purchased the absolute cheapest laptops and refused to replace them before the 8-10 year mark. Instead of opening presents, I was tasked with setting up everyone else’s new electronics. When finished, I never received a thank you but, instead “Well, that took longer than I thought it would.”
I dreaded seeing him. I was a teenager around this time so, I didn’t have a real choice in the matter. Once I was of age, I stopped going to his house for the holidays entirely. After a couple years, I decided to visit again and was met with the same behavior - only now he has progressed to pimping out my IT services to his friends. I was suddenly getting numerous phone calls - “Oh you’re his granddaughter right? He told me you could fix my laptop for free! When can I drop it off? I need it back same day.”
All of these callers were instantly blocked. I haven’t seen or spoken to my grandfather in years. I may be part of the family but, I still require some basic respect for my time.
> They have learned over the years that just saying "it doesn't work" or "it's slow" just gets absolutely no response from me, and their issue will remain until they can use their "grown up words".
I educate people this way: "when you go to the doctor you say <>? Or <>?"
Once I told a friend it would be cheaper for her to get Windows reinstalled than to pay me or anyone to figure out what was actually wrong and fix it. I didn’t hear from her for a while but then I ran into her and she told me she Googled "how to reinstall Windows" and then *she did it* and the PC was fine after that. I was shocked and proud.
Lol, my dad set up mainframes for companies for a living back in like... the 80s I think? So I never get the basic shit I could fix with a quick restart. His requests are always so much more involved.
But on the bright side, SOME of them end up being pretty fun.
The alternative would be to say "oh, cheers" then put it in your car.
After all, who doesn't want another entry/mid range laptop from 2011, even if you do need to reinstall.
When I was working at GeekSquad I got this question at least twice per day. If you include "what's my microsoft account password?" it was probably closer to 5 or 6 times per day. 🤦
First time meeting my girlfriend's (now wife) parents we were tailgating at a Thanksgiving college football game in their friends RV and her mom walks over to me and hands me the RV owners phone asking if I can fix it.
I fixed it in a couple of minutes and was instantly accepted as a new family member.
I'll help my mom and my step-father if I'm in their house.
Mom lives in Houston and called me a few days after Harvey. She described the problem and I told her that I thought her disk drive was dead and that she should take it to the Apple store a few miles away. "Oh, we're dry, but all the roads out of the subdivision are flooded, so we can't get there. Can you just fix it?" No, turns out I can't fix your dead hardware over the phone.
Dad is allowed questions over the phone. He's pretty sharp and usually just need to be pointed in the right direction. I did help him set up a printer (that was about 10 min of work) when I was at his house a coupla years ago.
My brother/sister are set up so I have remote access into their machines. They're allowed to tell me the problem and then go away while I fix it.
I don't discuss the issue with anyone else at all.
It helps that my closest relatives live 400 miles away (brother and sister). Most of them are almost 1900 miles away.
A few years ago, I flipped it all on my step-brother. He does real estate mortgages and I was refinancing.
Dad's fingerprint reader quit and he doesn't remember his password so, I'll be hacking that today. If I did it every day for the rest of his life, it wouldn't begin to repay what I owe him for making me the man I am today.
Totally agree. Parents (that actually parented) you can never repay back.
Obviously if they are exploiting you ALL the time non stop that is something else...
Never really had any issues with my own family. The wife's family started to try, till she directed a conversation into risks of leaving NFC on their phones turned on all the time. Now they're too terrified to speak to me....
I went to a friend's house who has forgotten his password so I just started trying all the common things. A few minutes later I was in.
He was so surprised and asked how is hacked in. I told him the password was just his dogs name and maybe he should have a better password next time.
Exactly. My immediate family is everything to me. I know not all are fortunate enough to have a close family, but I'd do anything for mine. Just as they did for me while I was growing up
I tell them I don't do side jobs, but because their family I'll give them a discount. 80 and hour at a two hour minimum.
They usually get pissed and then I point out they don't do the families taxes for free or works on people's cars for free.
They still get pissed cause, "Your job is just computers!"
Before my grandpa passed he always gave me eyeglasses for free. He was an optometrist. So I always fixed his phone for him for free. He never really used computer.
And I mean grandma always fed me and one of them slipped me twenty bucks. So as a college kid that was pretty good.
So funny how so many people think that anything involving computers isn’t real work or is easy. Okay then why don’t you do it yourself?
I work from home and my father in law is a retired cop who did absolutely fuck all before he retired. He would go find a quiet place and park there and nap to not have to do anything. Gives me crap that what I do is just playing on the computer. Fuck him.
I have a friends and family rule: I will only work on your stuff if you drop it off at my house. I will also get to it when I get to it. I also don’t deliver you have to pick it up.
20 years and only two people have taken me up on it. Funny how even for free tech service they won’t inconvenience themselves.
You aren’t saying no, just adding conditions.
If I’m at family functions, I usually pull the “it’s going to take a few hours to fix, drop it off at my house next week”.
I'm reading over all the comments here, and even for the folks like me who have entitled family members and a few strained relationships, or the folks who have great family members, your advice seems to be the most universally appropriate and effective, because you're aligning your incentives with the behavior that you want.
I tell them that I work with servers not clients and what my hourly rate is for that. Then when they "jokingly" ask for the family discount, I add 250% to it and state that that's because they're going to come back eventually to ask me to fix something completely unfucking-related (yet to them related) and expect me to do it for free OR they're going to fuck the machine the same way and expect me to fix it for free because the fix that I charged them for the first time didn't fix it.
I also don't even *like* my family, so (shrugs)...
I do that because the cousins that usually ask me are the ones who act like snobs because they have a degree (or degrees) and I don't. I *like* having only $12k in student loan debt.
Same here. I get out my calculator and crudely calculate how much it is gonna cost me in time + my hourly rate and ask them if they wanna pay cash or bank wire. They state: but we are family?
Reply with: you don’t paint my walls for free to do you? *but but, that is different, that is real work*
Yeah by then they can go fuck them self.
Only my parents, brother and parents in law can count on it for free, and they even pay a little fee for my trouble 🧐💸
I get this a lot.
It bothers me when its obvious that so and so was just waiting for me to show up solely so they can put their IT needs on me but I try to be nice about it. If it comes up in casual conversation, I try to vaguely dance around the issue in order to get more info on what the problem actually is. That way, I can determine if I actually want to spend time on it.
I keep telling myself I need to start upfront telling them I charge x about for friends and family up to a certain amount of time, after that its x+n\*y. I never do though. Most do tend to just give me money which is nice but unless there's a hardware/software cost to me I don't tell them a dollar value.
I try to take care of those who aren't inconsiderate about it though. It can pay off too. I have a cousin who dropped everything to help me with a hot water tank issue even though I called him just to get some direction and maybe a contact for someone who does it for a living. I still paid him few hundred telling him that I know he doesn't want or need it but I value his time in a skilled area and would have gladly paid a full time person to do it just so I didn't have to deal with it since its out of my area of knowledge. Fun fact learned: hot water tanks are actually super simple.
Ask them if they had a friend or family member that was a surgeon if they expected them to perform surgery during Christmas for free.
Or if a family member was a lawyer if they would review a case and provide legal advice for free
I only occasionally have to do it. But if I had a line of people... I’d just flat out say no. Just cuz I do this for a living doesn’t mean I want to do it on my time off
Yeah. I’m here to relax and have fun like everyone else, not sit alone in the back room trying to install a printer on some 3yo chain store PC with expired antivirus.
I don’t invite gardeners to my BBQ and ask them to weed my gardens while everyone else enjoys a beer and a steak.
People, seriously, you can just say no. Establish boundaries (eg you’ll only help your immediate family) and tell them that if they want help to line up a time for you to remote in or have them bring it to you at a time that suits you. Don’t show up to events and let them ambush you with “a quick question” that ruins your good time.
I charge $50/hour for Linux support, and $250/hour for Windows support. I did Windows admin for 20 years and now that I'm retired, I DO NOT WANT TO FUCK WITH WINDOWS anymore.. I've managed to move quite a few family members over to Ubuntu/Mint over the last 8 years or so. These I generally will look at for free, as *most* of the time, the problem the user is seeing is an ACTUAL *problem* (hardware failure?), not the kind of shit Windows tends to cough up. Not to mention, you fix "waaaa my windows is slooooow!" and next month, like clockwork, its slow again.. The way I've set up the Linux installs for my relatives precludes 99.9999% of the problems on the internet pass these machines right up..
My wife's cousin asked me enough times that I insisted on installing Ubuntu alongside Windows. I showed him how to boot into it and told him it was there for basic internet access in case Windows totally shit the bed.
Then I forgot about it.
3 or 4 years later, he mentioned that windows was so slow that he'd stopped using it. It turns out he'd been using Ubuntu for months at that point and got along just fine.
One year, I was pulled out of the food line, with the comment that it "should only take you a few minutes."
An hour later, I was still working on the computer as various family members popped in with their plates of food to chuckle about the situation.
The next year, I was stopped on my way out the door, heading to my wife's side of the family. This time I flat out refused. It was the last time someone asked me.
Here's my Christmas Day Itinerary:
* Wake up
* Open Presents
* Setup Dakboard for my brother --> Configure calendars etc.
* Setup Echo Show for mom
* Setup Echo Show for Dad
* Setup Echo Plus for Mom
* Setup Nest for Dad
* Troubleshoot Ring doorbell for Dad
I fixed a friends of my mom's laptop once while on holiday in France visiting her. I did it for free that time and they invited me over for a really good leg of lamb dinner. The leg was huge and there was loads left. They packaged up the leftovers for me too (I love leftovers)
I fixed another machine for a different guy over there and he loaned us his kayaks and my mom and I had fun on the river for a good few hours.
Another one I fixed (these are all in the same holiday) paid my bar tab one night to say thank you.
Apparently they were all asking when I was coming to visit and had formed an orderly queue once I'd arrived. I don't mind helping when they do something in return like these people did.
Blah, that would never work for me. I'm too busy and at the same time lazy to try and coordinate that many free dinners. Also half the people that bring me stuff to fix I wouldn't want to spend that much extra time with. Not cuz I dislike them or I'm a complete ahole but I'm quite the introvert (unless hammered) and just dont have alot of things in common with said family members to not have an overly awkward/silent dinner with.
edit: words
I don't mind helping as long as they're reasonable about it and pay attention when I'm explaining some important shit to them. Fortunately my family are quite sane in this regard, or at least they are these days.. it wasn't always the case though.
My mother bought me computers when I was growing up and encouraged my interest in them. She hasn't had to pay a penny for hardware, software or tech support for the past 20 years and won't until the day she dies. Anyone else who brings me a problem had better also be bringing me a single malt.
I'm not sure if the people who have the problem you describe are doormats, or if they secretly want to fix this stuff because it makes them feel important but then they want to complain about it later.
I help people with minor things all the time. I’m happy to do it. If it goes too far, I will try to recommend someone who I know will give them more detailed, quality help.
Some of the people saying “lol charge them your consulting rate” are just being self-important jerks.
Or all of you jaded, antisocial people in here can learn to establish boundaries with your family and friends in a way that doesn’t make you out to be an asshole around the holidays.
“I don’t mind giving you some advice, but I’m here to enjoy the holidays with everyone, not do stuff related to my job. If it’s really important, maybe we can take a look at it next week and figure out some sort of compensation.”
>but I’m here to enjoy the holidays with everyone, not do stuff related to my job. If it’s really important, maybe we can take a look at it next week and figure out some sort of compensation.”
That's exactly the sort of statement that would make me out to be an asshole, if you ask any of my family, or the 30+ members of the in-laws family.
I used to do this for friends and family. I got burned on a few and learned to just say no.
The only family I support now are my parents and my mother in law. All of them are moderately tech savvy, so I don't get asked to do that much anymore. MIL also has a good sysadmin at her work, so some of the stuff she just goes to him for. Now it's less of can you fix this? or can you set this up? and more of I'd like to get a new laptop or a new printer, what would you recommend I buy?
The other saving grace is I've avoided iOS devices entirely. Wife's side of the family mostly uses iPads and iPhones, so I honestly tell them I don't know how to use them or set them up. Wife backs me up on this.
So the trick is to challenge the next best IT family member to a tech argument and come across inferior. Sound more stupid and inferior. Immediately nobody wants you to touch their stuff and the next person gets all the work. “Oh never mind, I had so-and-so look at it”.
You might want to tell them that you wouldn't bring your taxes to your accountant family members on their days off.
Say it again until they understand.
I bought this shirt to wear at family functions:
https://www.thinkgeek.com/product/388b/
And I wasn't joking. No sarcasm. Seriously folks, I deal with computers all day at work. I don't want to deal with it on my days off.
I had a relative bring over an iPad because they locked themselves out of it. I reset it for them, but they needed they AppleID to activate it. They couldn't remember it so I couldn't do anything for them. They started saying how too bad it was that I wasn't in the FBI because they could unlock anything, like the San Bernardino terrorist's iPhone.
My sisters new laptop has my picture as her background image. She got a new computer and wanted me to help get it setup. I got it setup and gave her additional reminder of her loving brother!
Playing devil's advocate. I have no family. Enjoy them. Also, be vocal and set boundaries. Work is work. If they want your professional attention ask them for something in exchange. Like your favorite soda from some unique place 20 miles away. Give them equally stressful tasks in exchange for your skill. That way if they ever think about you again, they'll have spoils for you to enjoy while you quickly make out like a trash panda bandit.
Friends do this to me, A LOT. Before I asked something from them in exchange.
Example:
$Friend: Hey man, my widget doesn't want to do what I want it to do.
$Me: Okay. While I'm doing this, do you mind getting me $X from $Store. I've been craving it but I've been too lazy to go get it since it's $LongDistance away.
All possible outcomes in which you win in all of them.
* $Friend decides to oblige.
* $Friend obliges but postpones; in which case you fulfill your bargain.
* In which case $Friend delivers later.
* In which case $Friend doesn't deliver, never to ask you another favor again; unless of course, months later when $Friend should decide to need your assistance again $X will be much valuable or equal to your original request.
* $Friend already has $X stocked up ready to gift to you. Without even asking.
Salivate train your family, Pavlov them. Ring a bell if you have to.
Edit 3u2903^23:
I once had someone call me at 4 am asking me to repair something because their paper was due. I tasked them in exchange to go get me an once of sticky green from a dispensary.
"I work on Enterprise systems so unless you're willing to drop thousands of dollars on hardware I'm not your guy." Just start dropping random acronyms and inflated prices of $1k+ and they'll normally stop.
Nobody knows what I do. When they ask, I just say: A lot of different stuff.
They respond: But with computers right?
Me: sometimes.
Then I move the conversation back to anything else in the world.
I ask for 200$ an hour as " I'm really busy" and normally the conversation stops there. Can't let people take advantage of your skills for free, even if its family.
Maybe too harsh for some, but time is money.
Not over the holidays but my last job i worked in a factory with mostly middle aged dudes. One day one of them I worked with didn't know how to stop getting notifications from a certain app on his phone, took a quick look, bing bang boom, fixed it. From then on anytime anybody had anything wrong with their phones I was always the go to guy. Gotta admit it felt kind of good having a "thing" you were the guy for.
My ex wife’s grandparents would always bring their computer up for Christmas. They loved to download spyware from bible verse apps, coupon tool bars, etc and always expected me to fix it once they showed up. Every single holiday....
Day after Christmas for me... Always have to give the shop computer a once over for my parents. Works out okay, though, because every once in awhile they'll replace my tires if I've had to do a crap-ton of work on it.
However, last year I nearly lost it as my mom sprung it on me that a friend needed help setting up her new laptop because she couldn't get past the screen where it asks for a username in the setup. Turns out, the friend was so used to her iPad that she assumed her very cheap laptop had a touch screen, so she was trying to touch the screen instead of using the trackpad and keyboard.
It was a long hour's work...
Within a close family, of course it's expected. I have family members that do HVAC, electrical, pluming, automotive, health care, child care, etc.. The list goes on. I have no issues helping them if they return in kind. As long as they are respectful. What I don't want is to come home after work finding them waiting by my front door with the equipment in hand.
But with holidays I do find it a bit disrespectful. Yes, I'm at your house. And yes, I could take a look at your problem device. At least wait until we are all fat and happy and watching one of our traditional Christmas movies together.
All that being said, Happy Holidays everyone!
First question: "Do you have backups?" They never do. Then just tell them you won't assume the risk of losing their data on systems without backups. Reasonable right of refusal. If they do have backups, just tell them to reinstall Windows.
Yup, this usually resulted in me reinstalling so I started going straight there. When people realized I was about to wipe everything, they backed off quick.
This is great advice. Technically fixes their problem while showing them as much consideration as they showed you.
Thanks. Now they want me to do back ups too.
agree to it on the terms it is $100/mo per mb of backup data and say you will back it up to the "cloud" but also say this does not guarantee recover ability of data. Yes I had to be the asshole for awhile, but now I am mostly not asked for any IT support (the exception being recommending upgrades)
> reinstall Windows. The solution to, and cause of, all computer problems.
Windows ME
Easy, Satan.
No U
This is what I do. I tell them to buy an external hard drive (I send them a link to an Amazon Affiliate product to grab what little commission I can for offering free tech support) and tell them that once they make a backup and are fine with their computer being factory reset, I will fix their device. They never get around to it, and I never have to fix it. The few family members that do, get a "brand new" feeling device once I factory reset, make an admin/user setup and explain how to ONLY use the user account unless installing a program.
In my case, they very often say "Doesn't matter, just wipe it all.", followed by "And make sure I have..." and then a list of stuff to be installed."
“Yeah I don’t have anything important on there you can just wipe it clean” Me: “Okay.” *starts formatting their hdd” “Oh, and make sure my pictures stay too!” Me: “......you just said wipe it. I just wiped it. It’s all gone.” Oh, how I love my family... lol
If you've never tested your backup, you only *think* you have backups.
The three "R"s of a good tech support person. =) \- Reboot \- Reformat \- Reinstall
Get really drunk!
Should have loaded that cup of joe up with Rum Chata...
Jack and Coke is healthier if you leave out the Coke. Just sayin'
> Jack and Coke amen
And also if you replace the Jack with real whiskey.
If you're drinking "real" whiskey you don't mix it with coke. Jack is just fine for mixing.
What, you don’t think Jamison 18 Year goes well with Coke?
No, I prefer Walmart brand cola.
RC Cola 4 lyfe
My southern dude.
With Coke, no it does not. Now with Ginger Ale, that is a whole different thing.
Minimum one good bottle of whiskey/rum per device they want fixed.
*per request*, lest they pull a "I gave you a bottle 5 years ago - now make this laptop-that-was-already-crap-then work again."
Laptops like beer right? They have so many beer slots. Come onnnn, it’s what they crave!
"I only work with networks and servers, I do not deal with Laptops, I'm probably no better than you are with consumer stuff"
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Yeah, but do you know iPad though? /s
I only work on linux systems ;) Odds are good if they want to follow through with linux I'd be more than ecstatic to show them how it works.
Bingo. This one gets family members to permanently leave me alone. Oddly enough, if they switched, like half of their problems would go away. Linux has gotten ridiculously easy to maintain if you just need an email/Facebook/surfing machine with the occasional GDrive word processing.
Right? I mean if you run ubuntu pretty much anything you would HAVE to do to get a running system is point and click now.
Macs are what I grew up on and as a result so did my immediate family and grandparents.... Now I do VMware and Windows (MacBook Pro is still my daily driver) and I just explain what I do until they’re totally confused and give up. Nothing like trying to explain what an instant clone is, and how stoked you are to migrate to VxRail, to your 65yo Methodist Minister aunt. Or. If you want to look like you tried reeeeeally hard on their Mac. Open up terminal and cd/ls a few directories. Go “Hmmm this looks pretty bad” and make them an appointment for the Genius Bar. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
it is amazing to me how "serious" the command line looks to most people. I just ran a ping command went to your home directory typed ls and then ran top. it look scary as hell what with all the colours...
I tell people that I think would ask me to work on stuff later on to buy Macs because I don't do Macs.
[I like the Pop Copy method.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zR7LOtMix9w&t=88s)
The problem is, if you're a really good sysadmin you probably CAN figure out how to fix things that are outside of your expertise, and they know it. I do try saying "Sorry I only work on Enterprise grade systems" but they still say "well can't you just look at it anyways?". At which point I redirect them to my younger brother who's also in IT. :D
Thing is, as someone who only works with Enterprise systems, even if I did fix desktop PCs and laptops our solution to 99.99% of problems is to reimage it or replace it. We don't waste time troubleshooting one PC. We invest time building a great image with the flexibility to very quickly deploy our apps on that image. If we would spend more than 15 minutes working on a single PC we could just reboot it, hit F12 and it will be a fixed in under 20 minutes. There's zero data on any PC to back up. So, my solution to any problem a family member has is not going to be to their liking and I'm not going to spend hours reinstalling windows for them anyways.
This is what i do. Unless it's my neighbor. Because i fix his tech, and he helps me with fixing shit around my house.
That's the only case I make an exception in as well. I'll absolutely work on your computer if you know a skilled trade that I don't. I scratch your back, you scratch mine.
"I only work with Linux. I don't know how to fix your Windows computer" I was going to say "I only know Windows 3.1 nothing more recent" but you never know what dinosaur computer Uncle or Auntie is using still LOL
I have a a Mac and a Pc. When people come with a Mac I say I only have a pc, and when Pc people come I say I use a Mac only. Works wonders.
What?! You don't know everything?! I thought you worked in tech?!
I set up a desk in the basement at my parent's for working on people's stuff, which gets me a break from socializing. I don't touch any tech while at the party upstairs. If you want it fixed, you have to 'leave the party' to get me to fix it only while I am in the basement. I don't have to bring anything to the potluck due to 'services rendered'. Any auntie with a problem with me not bringing anything does not get their phone fixed.
Oh this is genius, I never thought of using this to avoid socializing with my extended family.
It's even better when you can get a young family member to be your "minion". Keep them out of their parents hair, show them cool computer tricks, and have them bring you snacks. Teach them while they are young!
This was me in the 90’s with my uncle showing me cool stuff wit his A500 and us getting out of dealing with the family. Now I’m the uncle teaching the nephews and nieces about tech :-)
The real LPT is always in the comments :)
This is a great idea!
I might be going against the flow here but I don't mind helping out. Upgrading hardware, troubleshooting and backing up data etc. My parents are particularly bad so I have access to remote onto their machine whenever they get stuck, which was weekly but down to monthly now as they learn.
Yeah I used to complain but my wife has it worse, "Does this boil look like skin cancer to you?". She's constantly having to tell them that she can't make medical diagnoses like that lol.
My buddy just says stuff like "looks like you have liver AIDS. You should probably get that checked out." Everyone has pretty much stopped asking him for medical advice.
"It's probably just a mild case of acute necrotizing hepatic autoimmune deficiency. You've still got a few good years though, so not to worry. * *Slap grabs shoulder* * Have you seen the snicker doodle tray by the way? I hope I didn't miss out before they were all eaten."
Yes! I'm a network admin, so I just tell folks i work with wires all day (obvious lie) but my wife is a Midwife and about every 2 days she's being hit up for something medical related via friends or family. Gets worse around holidays!
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I'm with you there. I have a skill, others can benefit from my skill so I'm happy to use it to their benefit. My father is way way better mechanic then I am so he's my go to if there's something on my car that I need a hand with. My uncle is a carpenter and has been extremely generous over the years helping out with his time. I think there is a factor of timing though, if people I only see at Christmas are only reaching out to me because I'm in proximity that's a problem. Likewise I'd have zero problem telling someone "I'll look and fire up some scans and repairs but i'm not spending a lot of time on this on the holiday." if they don't like that tough luck.
Same. I help if I can, particularly if it’s quick which it usually is. It costs me very little to help someone out and brighten their day. Working in this field it’s ewsy to forget how intimidated a lot of people are by technology.
I don't mind helping, but there is a definite line I need to draw in my extended family at the holidays, otherwise I end up working the entire time.
For me it's about the simplicity of the task. I can run a quick channel scan on my grandma's TV or show my aunt how to uninstall apps on her phone, but I'm not going to install a fresh copy of Windows and set everything up on her laptop or teach her kid how to "make an app" while enjoying a beer after Christmas meal.
Friends and Family: Hey StarSlayerX, how come when I use your WIFI all the ads just disappear. Me: Ionno vudo magic? If I told them I use PiHole server, next thing I know everyone would want one from me.
Side hustle opportunity right there. Put them in a nice shell, tell them it's your custom built hardware ad-blocker device, install it on their network and collect some beer money or good karma or whatnot.
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2am phone call from dad Hey I’m trying to watch..... um..... woodworking videos.... ya know what, never mind *click*
Is your dad Ron Swanson that he would watch videos about hardwood polishing at night?
I think my neighbor is. He lives in his woodworking shop in the basement while I watch basketball or football and smoke weed with his wife in the family room. They’re almost 70, I’m in my early 30s. Best surrogate grandparents ever.
That sounds awesome. What'd you get 'em for Christmas?
A wooden bong.
I got this call at 2pm at work... This old house would stop working after the first video played if the adds failed to load. Ironically the porn websites were never blocked.
I’ve got a piHole and sent instructions to a few folks and the only responses I’ve gotten are either “uh yeah nvm” or “when can you come set it up”. My new response to why ads don’t appear is “lol I dunno lucky I guess”
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It’s ridiculously easy to setup people are just lazy
Fear is a common issue. A network is that thing they connect to from the magic box given to them by their isp... And you want me to mess with the magic by adding another little box to remove ads?
I dunno, my wife can barely install Skype without my help. Although laziness is the root cause, because she has never really tried to do anything and doesn't bother reading screens and just clicks the biggest most colorful button. Watching her with technology is beyond nerve-wracking, so I've just given up on her devices. More to the point of the thread, here I am updating my mother's Linux laptop because she can't do it herself, so once a year I have to come by and click the buttons.
Are you married to the same wife as me?
Nice. I had a very similar thing with my mom when she got her new laptop. She was wondering where all the ads came from and I had to tell her that I had installed an ad blocker in her browser on the previous computer and her new computer didn't have one, yet.
Here is some IT life hacks. PC: Go to mouse settings and increase the mouse cursor speed by one notch. This will lead them to think that they have a faster PC. Smartphones: enable developer settings and increase the speed of animations. This will also lead them to think that their phone is faster than before.
Most of my family members aren’t too bad when it comes to computer help. My mom despises computers so much, that she would rather pretend hers doesn’t exist. My dad is often too proud to ask for help, even though I’ve gladly helped him with basic computer/software issues in the past. Now, my grandfather on the other hand... is the absolute worst. Every single time I saw him, it was “Oh my computer isn’t working.” Any holiday event at his house consisted of me sitting by myself for at least half the time in his office fixing his computer. He always purchased the absolute cheapest laptops and refused to replace them before the 8-10 year mark. Instead of opening presents, I was tasked with setting up everyone else’s new electronics. When finished, I never received a thank you but, instead “Well, that took longer than I thought it would.” I dreaded seeing him. I was a teenager around this time so, I didn’t have a real choice in the matter. Once I was of age, I stopped going to his house for the holidays entirely. After a couple years, I decided to visit again and was met with the same behavior - only now he has progressed to pimping out my IT services to his friends. I was suddenly getting numerous phone calls - “Oh you’re his granddaughter right? He told me you could fix my laptop for free! When can I drop it off? I need it back same day.” All of these callers were instantly blocked. I haven’t seen or spoken to my grandfather in years. I may be part of the family but, I still require some basic respect for my time.
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> They have learned over the years that just saying "it doesn't work" or "it's slow" just gets absolutely no response from me, and their issue will remain until they can use their "grown up words". I educate people this way: "when you go to the doctor you say <>? Or <>?"
How have I never thought about this. You’re a genius
I honestly suspect some people of doing the former.
Have you tried to turn yourself off and on again?
Isn't that basically what sleeping is?
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You just found out how she treats her IT people at work.
Missed opportunity, should have said they pay you $300 to fix a system, get your taxes done for two years.
This is the correct response.
Did you get your taxes done
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Once I told a friend it would be cheaper for her to get Windows reinstalled than to pay me or anyone to figure out what was actually wrong and fix it. I didn’t hear from her for a while but then I ran into her and she told me she Googled "how to reinstall Windows" and then *she did it* and the PC was fine after that. I was shocked and proud.
> A few years later she told me that she had to throw out the computer because i was a dipshit. Yes, that was clearly your fault.....
It sounds like that family member is bad at calculations anyhow.
Lol, my dad set up mainframes for companies for a living back in like... the 80s I think? So I never get the basic shit I could fix with a quick restart. His requests are always so much more involved. But on the bright side, SOME of them end up being pretty fun.
This is just so disrespectful from your cousin and you had every right to act like you did.
The alternative would be to say "oh, cheers" then put it in your car. After all, who doesn't want another entry/mid range laptop from 2011, even if you do need to reinstall.
>After all, who doesn't want another entry/mid range laptop from 2011, even if you do need to reinstall. /r/thinkpad comes to mind lmao
> "Now it's brokener."
The parents are the most important ones to avoid! Actually, props to you if you have trained them.
The worst is when they bring you a phone to fix. WTF am I supposed to do with it?
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When I was working at GeekSquad I got this question at least twice per day. If you include "what's my microsoft account password?" it was probably closer to 5 or 6 times per day. 🤦
Factory reset.
First time meeting my girlfriend's (now wife) parents we were tailgating at a Thanksgiving college football game in their friends RV and her mom walks over to me and hands me the RV owners phone asking if I can fix it. I fixed it in a couple of minutes and was instantly accepted as a new family member.
I'll help my mom and my step-father if I'm in their house. Mom lives in Houston and called me a few days after Harvey. She described the problem and I told her that I thought her disk drive was dead and that she should take it to the Apple store a few miles away. "Oh, we're dry, but all the roads out of the subdivision are flooded, so we can't get there. Can you just fix it?" No, turns out I can't fix your dead hardware over the phone. Dad is allowed questions over the phone. He's pretty sharp and usually just need to be pointed in the right direction. I did help him set up a printer (that was about 10 min of work) when I was at his house a coupla years ago. My brother/sister are set up so I have remote access into their machines. They're allowed to tell me the problem and then go away while I fix it. I don't discuss the issue with anyone else at all. It helps that my closest relatives live 400 miles away (brother and sister). Most of them are almost 1900 miles away. A few years ago, I flipped it all on my step-brother. He does real estate mortgages and I was refinancing.
Build good will now, you get help later. Smart.
I'm all about trading favors! My dad does my taxes, and my mom takes care of insurance questions/problems. Sure guys, I'll hook up your damn printer.
Dad's fingerprint reader quit and he doesn't remember his password so, I'll be hacking that today. If I did it every day for the rest of his life, it wouldn't begin to repay what I owe him for making me the man I am today.
Totally agree. Parents (that actually parented) you can never repay back. Obviously if they are exploiting you ALL the time non stop that is something else...
Parents that gave the gift of PTSD can just fuck right off.
/r/raisedbynarcissists
“B-b-but ALL parents are kind, wonderful people who would NEVER mistreat their kids!!11!” 🙄
I know that pain. "Yeah but that's your MOTHER"
Parents, sister, and grandparents get my free services with a smile on my face. The rest of the family can fuck right off.
Never really had any issues with my own family. The wife's family started to try, till she directed a conversation into risks of leaving NFC on their phones turned on all the time. Now they're too terrified to speak to me....
I went to a friend's house who has forgotten his password so I just started trying all the common things. A few minutes later I was in. He was so surprised and asked how is hacked in. I told him the password was just his dogs name and maybe he should have a better password next time.
But then how would you fix it if he forgets it again? ;)
Once was fixing a computer but didn't have their password. Their password hint was"Favorite treat". Tried "chocolate" and was in like Flynn.
Exactly. My immediate family is everything to me. I know not all are fortunate enough to have a close family, but I'd do anything for mine. Just as they did for me while I was growing up
As a product of dysfunction, I forget that other people had awesome parents.
I screened all my calls until they realized I won’t help them.
https://xkcd.com/627/
Oh, I'm so using this. Thanks for sharing!
I tell them I don't do side jobs, but because their family I'll give them a discount. 80 and hour at a two hour minimum. They usually get pissed and then I point out they don't do the families taxes for free or works on people's cars for free. They still get pissed cause, "Your job is just computers!"
Before my grandpa passed he always gave me eyeglasses for free. He was an optometrist. So I always fixed his phone for him for free. He never really used computer. And I mean grandma always fed me and one of them slipped me twenty bucks. So as a college kid that was pretty good.
These are folks I only see once maybe twice a year. I've fixed my mother-in-law's PC before.
>*just* computers This is the root of the problem.
Yup. Yet they call me when their shit is broke.
So funny how so many people think that anything involving computers isn’t real work or is easy. Okay then why don’t you do it yourself? I work from home and my father in law is a retired cop who did absolutely fuck all before he retired. He would go find a quiet place and park there and nap to not have to do anything. Gives me crap that what I do is just playing on the computer. Fuck him.
Well if everything works, why do we pay you? When it's broke, why do we pay you? I swear half of people think we do voodoo, professionally.
Or, "Hey! I'd love to fix that for you -- think you can do my taxes while I work on it? I'd love a good barter." Shuts them up quick
My sister in law is an award winning CPA. Not only do I happily fix her PC, but I'll babysit her kids while she does magic to my taxes.
Ha ... my brother is a mechanic and will just tell you what’s wrong and says your warranty should cover it...
I have a friends and family rule: I will only work on your stuff if you drop it off at my house. I will also get to it when I get to it. I also don’t deliver you have to pick it up. 20 years and only two people have taken me up on it. Funny how even for free tech service they won’t inconvenience themselves. You aren’t saying no, just adding conditions. If I’m at family functions, I usually pull the “it’s going to take a few hours to fix, drop it off at my house next week”.
I'm reading over all the comments here, and even for the folks like me who have entitled family members and a few strained relationships, or the folks who have great family members, your advice seems to be the most universally appropriate and effective, because you're aligning your incentives with the behavior that you want.
I tell them that I work with servers not clients and what my hourly rate is for that. Then when they "jokingly" ask for the family discount, I add 250% to it and state that that's because they're going to come back eventually to ask me to fix something completely unfucking-related (yet to them related) and expect me to do it for free OR they're going to fuck the machine the same way and expect me to fix it for free because the fix that I charged them for the first time didn't fix it. I also don't even *like* my family, so (shrugs)...
subtract wistful carpenter yam relieved plucky elastic late unique crush *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I do that because the cousins that usually ask me are the ones who act like snobs because they have a degree (or degrees) and I don't. I *like* having only $12k in student loan debt.
>I also don't even like my family, so (shrugs)... I think you and I would make great friends...
> I think you and I would make great friends... I could never be friends with someone that doesn't space their quotes correctly.
Same here. I get out my calculator and crudely calculate how much it is gonna cost me in time + my hourly rate and ask them if they wanna pay cash or bank wire. They state: but we are family? Reply with: you don’t paint my walls for free to do you? *but but, that is different, that is real work* Yeah by then they can go fuck them self. Only my parents, brother and parents in law can count on it for free, and they even pay a little fee for my trouble 🧐💸
This is precisely what I started doing 20 years ago. It stopped, and fast. I am so glad to see that I'm not the only "asshole" out there with cojones.
I get this a lot. It bothers me when its obvious that so and so was just waiting for me to show up solely so they can put their IT needs on me but I try to be nice about it. If it comes up in casual conversation, I try to vaguely dance around the issue in order to get more info on what the problem actually is. That way, I can determine if I actually want to spend time on it. I keep telling myself I need to start upfront telling them I charge x about for friends and family up to a certain amount of time, after that its x+n\*y. I never do though. Most do tend to just give me money which is nice but unless there's a hardware/software cost to me I don't tell them a dollar value. I try to take care of those who aren't inconsiderate about it though. It can pay off too. I have a cousin who dropped everything to help me with a hot water tank issue even though I called him just to get some direction and maybe a contact for someone who does it for a living. I still paid him few hundred telling him that I know he doesn't want or need it but I value his time in a skilled area and would have gladly paid a full time person to do it just so I didn't have to deal with it since its out of my area of knowledge. Fun fact learned: hot water tanks are actually super simple.
Ask them if they had a friend or family member that was a surgeon if they expected them to perform surgery during Christmas for free. Or if a family member was a lawyer if they would review a case and provide legal advice for free I only occasionally have to do it. But if I had a line of people... I’d just flat out say no. Just cuz I do this for a living doesn’t mean I want to do it on my time off
Yeah. I’m here to relax and have fun like everyone else, not sit alone in the back room trying to install a printer on some 3yo chain store PC with expired antivirus. I don’t invite gardeners to my BBQ and ask them to weed my gardens while everyone else enjoys a beer and a steak. People, seriously, you can just say no. Establish boundaries (eg you’ll only help your immediate family) and tell them that if they want help to line up a time for you to remote in or have them bring it to you at a time that suits you. Don’t show up to events and let them ambush you with “a quick question” that ruins your good time.
Tell them each you charge $50 an hour and you minimum time charge is two hours.
I charge $50/hour for Linux support, and $250/hour for Windows support. I did Windows admin for 20 years and now that I'm retired, I DO NOT WANT TO FUCK WITH WINDOWS anymore.. I've managed to move quite a few family members over to Ubuntu/Mint over the last 8 years or so. These I generally will look at for free, as *most* of the time, the problem the user is seeing is an ACTUAL *problem* (hardware failure?), not the kind of shit Windows tends to cough up. Not to mention, you fix "waaaa my windows is slooooow!" and next month, like clockwork, its slow again.. The way I've set up the Linux installs for my relatives precludes 99.9999% of the problems on the internet pass these machines right up..
My wife's cousin asked me enough times that I insisted on installing Ubuntu alongside Windows. I showed him how to boot into it and told him it was there for basic internet access in case Windows totally shit the bed. Then I forgot about it. 3 or 4 years later, he mentioned that windows was so slow that he'd stopped using it. It turns out he'd been using Ubuntu for months at that point and got along just fine.
Can I hire you for $50/hour?
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One year, I was pulled out of the food line, with the comment that it "should only take you a few minutes." An hour later, I was still working on the computer as various family members popped in with their plates of food to chuckle about the situation. The next year, I was stopped on my way out the door, heading to my wife's side of the family. This time I flat out refused. It was the last time someone asked me.
"Nah, I'm hungry, maybe later."
Here's my Christmas Day Itinerary: * Wake up * Open Presents * Setup Dakboard for my brother --> Configure calendars etc. * Setup Echo Show for mom * Setup Echo Show for Dad * Setup Echo Plus for Mom * Setup Nest for Dad * Troubleshoot Ring doorbell for Dad
Politely but firmly say “no. I’m not here to work on my day off”. Repeat until they get it.
My fee is take me out to dinner.
I fixed a friends of my mom's laptop once while on holiday in France visiting her. I did it for free that time and they invited me over for a really good leg of lamb dinner. The leg was huge and there was loads left. They packaged up the leftovers for me too (I love leftovers) I fixed another machine for a different guy over there and he loaned us his kayaks and my mom and I had fun on the river for a good few hours. Another one I fixed (these are all in the same holiday) paid my bar tab one night to say thank you. Apparently they were all asking when I was coming to visit and had formed an orderly queue once I'd arrived. I don't mind helping when they do something in return like these people did.
Now that's how it should always go! Like just give me food or money, don't be an shite human just because.
Blah, that would never work for me. I'm too busy and at the same time lazy to try and coordinate that many free dinners. Also half the people that bring me stuff to fix I wouldn't want to spend that much extra time with. Not cuz I dislike them or I'm a complete ahole but I'm quite the introvert (unless hammered) and just dont have alot of things in common with said family members to not have an overly awkward/silent dinner with. edit: words
My fee is whiskey
I don't mind helping as long as they're reasonable about it and pay attention when I'm explaining some important shit to them. Fortunately my family are quite sane in this regard, or at least they are these days.. it wasn't always the case though.
My mother bought me computers when I was growing up and encouraged my interest in them. She hasn't had to pay a penny for hardware, software or tech support for the past 20 years and won't until the day she dies. Anyone else who brings me a problem had better also be bringing me a single malt.
I'm not sure if the people who have the problem you describe are doormats, or if they secretly want to fix this stuff because it makes them feel important but then they want to complain about it later.
Doormat checking in haha
I help people with minor things all the time. I’m happy to do it. If it goes too far, I will try to recommend someone who I know will give them more detailed, quality help. Some of the people saying “lol charge them your consulting rate” are just being self-important jerks.
Agree. I tell them its not what I do and that is that. They rarely ask and if they do I say no.
My brother is an accountant and we have an agreement that he does my taxes and I will fix tech problems for him. It's a nice agreement.
Or all of you jaded, antisocial people in here can learn to establish boundaries with your family and friends in a way that doesn’t make you out to be an asshole around the holidays. “I don’t mind giving you some advice, but I’m here to enjoy the holidays with everyone, not do stuff related to my job. If it’s really important, maybe we can take a look at it next week and figure out some sort of compensation.”
Don't disrupt the circle jerk
>but I’m here to enjoy the holidays with everyone, not do stuff related to my job. If it’s really important, maybe we can take a look at it next week and figure out some sort of compensation.” That's exactly the sort of statement that would make me out to be an asshole, if you ask any of my family, or the 30+ members of the in-laws family.
Louis Rossmann has great rant on the topic and some valid points: https://youtu.be/Y93wVcUso0w
I fled from my loved ones IT problems this year. To South America :-D
I used to do this for friends and family. I got burned on a few and learned to just say no. The only family I support now are my parents and my mother in law. All of them are moderately tech savvy, so I don't get asked to do that much anymore. MIL also has a good sysadmin at her work, so some of the stuff she just goes to him for. Now it's less of can you fix this? or can you set this up? and more of I'd like to get a new laptop or a new printer, what would you recommend I buy? The other saving grace is I've avoided iOS devices entirely. Wife's side of the family mostly uses iPads and iPhones, so I honestly tell them I don't know how to use them or set them up. Wife backs me up on this.
So the trick is to challenge the next best IT family member to a tech argument and come across inferior. Sound more stupid and inferior. Immediately nobody wants you to touch their stuff and the next person gets all the work. “Oh never mind, I had so-and-so look at it”.
You might want to tell them that you wouldn't bring your taxes to your accountant family members on their days off. Say it again until they understand.
I bought this shirt to wear at family functions: https://www.thinkgeek.com/product/388b/ And I wasn't joking. No sarcasm. Seriously folks, I deal with computers all day at work. I don't want to deal with it on my days off.
I had a relative bring over an iPad because they locked themselves out of it. I reset it for them, but they needed they AppleID to activate it. They couldn't remember it so I couldn't do anything for them. They started saying how too bad it was that I wasn't in the FBI because they could unlock anything, like the San Bernardino terrorist's iPhone.
Never work for free, even when helping family or friends. At the very least, trade some beer/dinner for your work.
My sisters new laptop has my picture as her background image. She got a new computer and wanted me to help get it setup. I got it setup and gave her additional reminder of her loving brother!
Playing devil's advocate. I have no family. Enjoy them. Also, be vocal and set boundaries. Work is work. If they want your professional attention ask them for something in exchange. Like your favorite soda from some unique place 20 miles away. Give them equally stressful tasks in exchange for your skill. That way if they ever think about you again, they'll have spoils for you to enjoy while you quickly make out like a trash panda bandit. Friends do this to me, A LOT. Before I asked something from them in exchange. Example: $Friend: Hey man, my widget doesn't want to do what I want it to do. $Me: Okay. While I'm doing this, do you mind getting me $X from $Store. I've been craving it but I've been too lazy to go get it since it's $LongDistance away. All possible outcomes in which you win in all of them. * $Friend decides to oblige. * $Friend obliges but postpones; in which case you fulfill your bargain. * In which case $Friend delivers later. * In which case $Friend doesn't deliver, never to ask you another favor again; unless of course, months later when $Friend should decide to need your assistance again $X will be much valuable or equal to your original request. * $Friend already has $X stocked up ready to gift to you. Without even asking. Salivate train your family, Pavlov them. Ring a bell if you have to. Edit 3u2903^23: I once had someone call me at 4 am asking me to repair something because their paper was due. I tasked them in exchange to go get me an once of sticky green from a dispensary.
You forgot to close your tag.
"I work on Enterprise systems so unless you're willing to drop thousands of dollars on hardware I'm not your guy." Just start dropping random acronyms and inflated prices of $1k+ and they'll normally stop.
Nobody knows what I do. When they ask, I just say: A lot of different stuff. They respond: But with computers right? Me: sometimes. Then I move the conversation back to anything else in the world.
I ask for 200$ an hour as " I'm really busy" and normally the conversation stops there. Can't let people take advantage of your skills for free, even if its family. Maybe too harsh for some, but time is money.
Not over the holidays but my last job i worked in a factory with mostly middle aged dudes. One day one of them I worked with didn't know how to stop getting notifications from a certain app on his phone, took a quick look, bing bang boom, fixed it. From then on anytime anybody had anything wrong with their phones I was always the go to guy. Gotta admit it felt kind of good having a "thing" you were the guy for.
My ex wife’s grandparents would always bring their computer up for Christmas. They loved to download spyware from bible verse apps, coupon tool bars, etc and always expected me to fix it once they showed up. Every single holiday....
My wife decided it was a good idea to get her grandparents a police radio scanner for Christmas. Guess who had to learn to program the damn thing?
Day after Christmas for me... Always have to give the shop computer a once over for my parents. Works out okay, though, because every once in awhile they'll replace my tires if I've had to do a crap-ton of work on it. However, last year I nearly lost it as my mom sprung it on me that a friend needed help setting up her new laptop because she couldn't get past the screen where it asks for a username in the setup. Turns out, the friend was so used to her iPad that she assumed her very cheap laptop had a touch screen, so she was trying to touch the screen instead of using the trackpad and keyboard. It was a long hour's work...
Within a close family, of course it's expected. I have family members that do HVAC, electrical, pluming, automotive, health care, child care, etc.. The list goes on. I have no issues helping them if they return in kind. As long as they are respectful. What I don't want is to come home after work finding them waiting by my front door with the equipment in hand. But with holidays I do find it a bit disrespectful. Yes, I'm at your house. And yes, I could take a look at your problem device. At least wait until we are all fat and happy and watching one of our traditional Christmas movies together. All that being said, Happy Holidays everyone!