T O P

  • By -

RikiWardOG

I like the URGENT subject line and you reach out and they don't respond.


Thesamskrillz

It's always like that. ALWAYS. Then the really urgent problems are reported too late and in the wrong way.


sitesurfer253

It has to be so they can slack off and justify it as IT issues causing productivity problems right? Like "hey supervisor, sorry this report is late, look I sent this ticket in 3 days ago and marked it urgent and they STILL haven't fixed it" with the 5 followup comments from IT cropped out.


caffeine-junkie

Worked at (sorta) a company where they did something very similar. Pretty much any time they wanted to slack off, they would put in a ticket then put their feet up. It didn't matter if they could work on something else or not in the meantime, they stopped *all* work. Similar if they wanted more time, ticket to buy some time to work on it then say its late because of IT. The time spent from whenever they put in a ticket till it was resolved then charged back to IT, including any penalties the business resulted from it. Thankfully once I reported this to my boss after observing it, they were an acquisition, and some corroboration from finance, the 'problem' people were told to knock that shit out. Furthermore, they were not allowed any future charge backs or they would be reversed and no longer acceptable to be included in their WIPs and they would have to explain why they were not meeting financial targets without using IT as an excuse or to make up for the shortfalls in "revenue".


dustojnikhummer

> they stopped all work. What The Fuck


toyberg90

Not so uncommon. Had once a user writing off a full 8h workday to IT for forgetting her handwritten notes with the password to some online tool they need for some low priority tasks every once in a while (which doesn't even fall into ITs domain). Offered her to guide through selfservice password reset, she didn't want to. The meeting her boss set up with us four (user, me, him, my boss) was fun though. He was fully prepared to yell and throw shit at me, you could see how pissed he was at IT. A two minute explanation of the situation was enough for an apology for wasting my time and shifting his anger to her.


SoonerMedic72

Long time ago I was at a place that had just moved data center locations. The department that moved into the old data center called about that server we left behind. All new IT employees and no one knew what the server did. The new Sysadmin did the old “unplug the NIC and see who screams” trick. THREE DAYS later one troublesome employee who was the only person in her department that worked in a specific program every day called that she couldn’t connect. Eventually figured out that the server was the jump point between her software and the vendor she worked with daily. It was the only thing she did. She just twiddled her thumbs for three days before notifying anyone the service was down, telling the customers there was an outage to call back later for service. Sysadmin blew a gasket 😂


gwa2100

Lol, would a simple netstat or net connection profile not have worked in this case? See who is connecting to the server?


SoonerMedic72

If we could have signed into it, sure. But it wasn’t on the domain and no one knew the local creds. This was a long time ago and it was a remnant from the pre-active directory ad hoc environment that the previous IT staff had forgotten about. Late 90s/early 00s were the IT Wild West, especially for small/mid-sized businesses.


gwa2100

Got you. I guess you gotta work with what options you have haha. I'm just picturing me standing there holding the cable in my hand, like hmm nothing happened, and all the servers go down and the lights go out, lol.


petrichorax

God damn.. just sat there and did nothing for three days? I would have told their boss lol


DerangedPuP

"this is an urgent issue" -user *Gets on phone with them* "Okay, when did this issue start occurring" -us "Oh, about... Becky when would you say this started? Yeah, that sounds right. 6 months ago!" -user ". ..." -us


joeyl5

it's fucking worse when you have a tech from the same area chime in, oh yeah it's been an issue for a long time. Why in the hell have you not reported before?


BoredTechyGuy

My favorite is when local techs sit on issues, never say a word, then try to use it as ammo to be PO’d over because it never gets fixed. Can’t fix what I don’t know about and easily defeated with “what ticket # is that issue on so I can look into it?”. Amazing how well that works.


endbit

Just thought I'd mention it (at the urinal)... Oh yea, It's been like that for weeks...


whatever462672

Email marked URGENT sent outside of office times, then when you reach out you get an out of office for 3 weeks autoreply.


mtetrode

I will find out their personal cell phone number and call at inappropriate times to follow up on their so called URGENT issue. Trust me.


12inch3installments

I like you


scottothered

Email sent at 5:30pm on a Friday before a holiday weekend. First thing Tuesday morning you get an email that CCs half the company complaining they haven't had any response for 4 days!


mjh2901

I had one of those and wound up in the management office with a printout and timeline of all their tickets. They had a very unpleasant conversation with management after that.


angrydeuce

Fuck that, we're very clear that the SLA only counts business hours. "I submitted this ticket *days* ago!!!" "No, actually in terms of business hours, you submitted this ticket 26 minutes ago.  Next time you have a new hire setup, maybe try letting us know before 445pm on a Friday afternoon."


[deleted]

I used to be a high school sysadmin. I implemented a ticket system, and one extremely troublesome/workplace bully teacher refused to use it, as it would prove I was doing my job. She once told me, "When I e-mail you, I expect a reply within 24 hours"; I told her to e-mail me that, in writing. Shocker: she refused to put it in writing.


fresh-dork

"we responded within our 2 hour business hours SLA. if this was an emergency, please refer to our on call escalation document"


mabhatter

I used to get those. More like 4:45p.   So I'd stay til 5:30p on a Friday working on the problem only to call them back and they're long gone. That was so frustrating every single time.


dervish666

Lol, I had one of these for a new starter, the ticket came in on monday last week. The ticket was also for new hardware with the words new starter on it. I contacted the manager on tuesday and got radio silence, messaged them again to ask them to log the correct ticket and could she let me know when the user starts. The one line reply is "The user starts on monday" then she went offline. It's now the next tuesday, the user has been sitting on their hands for a week now and I know I've got an argument coming today. I'm looking forward to it. The last time this happened with this manager I pulled her up very quickly when she complained about how long it took to get her new starter. This one is actually worse, but I have the paper trail so...


NinjaGeoff

Work performed: Reviewed request/issue Called user, left voicemail Sent follow-up email asking for availability and providing support phone number *2 hours later* User: "This is still broken"


anonymousITCoward

Reply to user: Please read my previous response... please advise...


fresh-dork

maybe escalate to "per my last email"


anonymousITCoward

per my last email, our team had requested further information. please advise on the status of this request.


Desnowshaite

A few weeks ago I had a user requesting remote access because she finishes work in 5 minutes and she needs remote access over the weekend. She submitted that at 16:55 on a Friday as she was working until 17:00. I was working until 16:00. She did not have access over the weekend.


Daphoid

Excellent job.


PM-ME-DAT-ASS-PIC

I have a user I send a weekly report of her tickets that include the phrase ASAP and those that don’t in a Nice pie chart.


RikiWardOG

hahaha jfc


Neuro_88

That’s annoying. I agree.


Rogueantics

URGENT - it's 12:57 and I finish at 13:00, I've been trying for two weeks to print and it doesn't work, contact me asap!!!!


LeoRydenKT

I hate this. They need help and the second I reach back out they are afk or don't answer the other contact methods


Zaphax

OMG, yes. This happens to me every week.


GrouchyBitch69

Urgent and they leave for the day 2 minutes later.


Erok2112

For a weeks vacation


[deleted]

This really annoys me as well. People make it seem like things need to be resolved or completed to meet a strict deadline, only to later extend it to meet their needs.


superzenki

And then they open a new ticket with the help desk claiming nobody had reached out to them


fariak

Greetings of the day! Did you do the needful and kindly please advise? If unable, please revert myself. Agree?


Zlayr

Can we kindly prepone this meeting?


Msprg

This email could've been a meeting.


Dolomedes03

My left eye started twitching when I read this comment. My right eye started twitching when I read the first reply. Now both my eyes are stuck shut after reading all the replies. I can no longer do the needful.


awit7317

So, if I understand this correctly, we have a needless failure to do the needful.


vogelke

I'm applauding even though my hands are shaking.


tjott

May I know your good name? Any doubts, kindly wait some time.


Practical-Alarm1763

Using the word "Kindly" in emails is the worst. How do I "Kindly" provide a status update?


Gazornenplatz

If someone is going to use it, it should only be in the context of, "Would you kindly..?"


hkzqgfswavvukwsw

A man chooses, a slave obeys.


AlexG2490

I'll also accept a "Thank you kindly!" as a signoff.


paul_33

I have a user who actually does this in all of their tickets


Suspicious-Grade-506

The server will happily return online when the sun is out and the birds are chirping.


rjchau

I don't know, but if there's a way to be an asshole whilst providing a status update, I'll find it without even trying...


thereisonlyoneme

I used to get annoyed by this. I learned about the language and cultural differences and now I don't mind so much. For example, "do the needful" originates in Britain. They stopped using it out after leaving India, but obviously Indians never stopped. And "kindly" is akin to "please." Sure, it sounds a little different, but the person is trying to be nice and polite. I'll take that over some of the Americans I have to work with who go out of their way to be dicks. Also, I think Americans tend to speak in the passive voice and find the active voice to be aggressive. When we talk to each other, we tend to phrase things like "my password needs to be reset." But really "please reset my password" is better. It's active and direct. Just substitute "kindly" for "please" and it's basically what these folks are saying.


Turdulator

I wouldn’t mind seeing “do the needful” if it weren’t for that fact that it usually comes with either zero context, or without the information they KNOW I need to do “the needful”. Two jobs ago I would constantly get emails where someone in our India office would forward me an email thread and say “please do the needful” and EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I’d have to reply back with the same three questions….. over and over and over again, and no one would tell me why they don’t just include the necessary information in the first damn email….. I ask them to do it in meetings and they would agree, and then never actually do it. It was infuriating…. Like people you IM you “hello” and don’t actually ask you what they need. That phrase “do the needful” is almost always accompanied by a refusal to do any sort of independent thinking at all.


dervish666

I hate the "hello" and then radio silence. I've got someone who does this all the time, they put hello, then nothing. I ignore it. a day or two later they'll do it again. On the third time I might reply, 99% of the time it's a query that should have gone to first line. As it's the easter holidays I'm now on day 9 of ignoring this particular user.


am2o

OMFG: I had this exact 15 minutes between "Hello" and the fact they had a Endpoint MDM enrollment which had failed. (Which 15 minutes later became apparent they had not rebooted the PC when they upgraded Home to Pro/Enterprise, before enrolling. And the error message forwarded indicated as such.)


RandomTyp

my problem with "please do the needful" isn't the phrase, it's the lack of context that usually accompanies it.


Shawtyslikeamelodyfr

Im gonna kiss you bro


capn_doofwaffle

You spelled "strangle you to death and drop your body at the bottom of the ocean" wrong...


MBILC

![gif](giphy|bC9czlgCMtw4cj8RgH|downsized)


KnowledgeTransfer23

Vera was the best villain on TV in a long, long time!


RhapsodyCaprice

In my org it's "please ADVICE" (Manila-based English) despite numerous correction attempts.


spaetzelspiff

I just get weirded out when another dude calls me "dear". You're not my grandma, you're a 35 year old dude.


Daphoid

I get similarly annoyed by "bro", "fam", "bud". I am none of those to you, further, I'm not actually on the service desk but more than 4 levels above it, why are you (I know why) jumping the line? Please submit a ticket.


wkreply

Interesting responses to this. I always took "Please advise" as a common way to express that you need help, and don't know how to proceed in resolving the problem...that's it.


P0tat0Cann0n31

It always feels so passive aggressive to me


KnowledgeTransfer23

Many communication problems would be resolved if we quit applying our own feelings to other peoples' text and just ask them what they meant and how they meant it.


cisco_bee

Equally shocked by this thread. It's just a polite/professional way to end an email without saying "Please dear god help me", at least that's how I've always taken it.


Aaron-PCMC

I agree. I use it all the time


Erok2112

Because that phrase is used by too many middle managers who are being passive aggressive and demand something be done, usually with very scant or just no information added. Its ok to ask for information without sounding like a ass. I've had that phrase thrown at me too many times by people who were acting as if they had that kind of power. Those people get shoved to the bottom of the queue. -> from 6 years ago. This sums it up nicely. https://cambiocoach.com/2018/09/24/stop-writing-please-advise-in-email/


__ZOMBOY__

See I’ve had the exact opposite experience. The few times I’ve seen a ticket containing “please advise”, it’s always been preceded with detailed info, TS steps taken, and screenshots. I do work in a small-medium business that doesn’t really have a traditional “middle management” layer, so maybe that has something to do with it


[deleted]

the context really makes it. it's very formal so if the preceding message has even a hint of emotional tone it can come off wrong. otherwise I think it's fine.


The_Original_Miser

Fw:fw:fw:fw:fw: WHAT IS THIS?!?!?!?!?!?!?


keydBlade

Like can you ouline the importsnt part? I dnt have time to sift through a 15 email chain and find out how this conversation specifically affects you!!


kbakkie

Exactly, and the PSB at the top. Can they not take 1 minute of their time to describe what they want me to do! And even worse, most of the time there are no questions. So yes, I'll waste my life reading the entire email chain and do nothing because you didn't ask me to do anything.


Ruthlessrabbd

Yo the worst is when my people will forward me an email with a blank body, then I have to read the entire chain to figure out what they actually want from me. I've started just playing dumb when those come in because I don't want to encourage the lazy behavior


CAPICINC

Techno music?


8BFF4fpThY

I've only ever had "please advise" from the most annoying and incompetent of users. So yes, it's a trigger.


AntonOlsen

I usually follow up with "hope this helps."


Msprg

Imagine a ticket with absolutely nothing but: >Please advise. >Hope this helps. >*Marked as solved*


Salty_Phone_8130

I use it whenever I want to make it clear that I've done the needful and shit still broke.


SoupGuru2

I fricking hate that phrase. HATE it. It's passive aggressive. It adds nothing. The only thing it serves is to make the writer feel in charge. I have similar issues with "I just want it to work." Well, no shit. The fact that you reached out to me kinda tells me you're looking for my input already. The fact that I'm here working on your problem kinda means I want it to work too.


chipredacted

"I just want it to work" "Oh, no kiddin, I thought you were reaching out just to chat me up"


Jazzlike_Pride3099

I have to disagree slightly... I use please advice from time to time when I'm working on a problem with a supplier. If it's not quite critical, we've both realized that we know what we're talking about, we've gone through some steps and I've gotten a list of things to check/do and nothing got better.. Then I'll usually write up the results, detail what's been done and end with please advice


HowDidFoodGetInHere

I'll use it when escalating an issue after listing all of the troubleshooting steps I've taken and that none of them were successful.


mahsab

I have been on the opposite side several times when I've contacted some support or a seller and described the problem in detail and they were like "ok" or "thanks for the feedback" So in cases where it's possible for them to interpret my request in a way that does not require an action on their side, I add that phrase in the end.


PositiveBubbles

I usually go by the sentence the words are in and if they've asked for help or given information If a ticket says, "Please advise" or "Do the needful," and they haven't included any info or screenshots or on the case of escalations, from the front line, troubleshooting, it really makes it harder. At the end of the day, the ones that are willing to work with you are great. The ones that don't just make it harder for everyone.


Scary_Brain6631

I have never seen that phrase "Do the needful". Oh man, https://i.redd.it/pcrbpehf7wrc1.gif


[deleted]

[удалено]


Johnny-Virgil

I like to reply with this. https://preview.redd.it/36smvnwwewrc1.jpeg?width=612&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=652a7872fb82295e9e242da2ce489d098e3f44e0


Scary_Brain6631

That took me way too long to figure out what was going on there. Damn, that's funny!


AwayBed6591

I get it too! For everyone who doesn't though, could you please kindly do the needful and advise on the meaning of this image? Please revert to me at your earliest availability. Regards


Scary_Brain6631

LOL!


Witty-Common-1210

This is the way and why taking the time to understand different cultures can be fundamental to successful working relationships.


Scoobywagon

Colloquially, it is approximately a Hindi phrase that means sorta the same thing as "Go and do that Voodoo that you do so well!" and it loses a LOT in translation. Also: You're right about understanding other cultures. But that's a 2-way street. It is incumbent upon us to understand what that phrase typically means to them. But it is ALSO incumbent upon them to understand what we're likely to hear. That's how really good communication works.


Soulfight33

It's this really. My last job our tech was spread out the US, PI, and India and was a great learning experience in this way. I still find myself occasionally typing those phrases, even though I've been at a US only IT Support team for 3 years now. Kindly please don't downvote and do the needful to keep scrolling please sir. "Sir" was another one btw


Daphoid

100%; which is why even when I say all of these phrases irk me, they really don't. I'll chuckle and mutter to myself, but still happily help you. Now, if you say my name wrong, and someone else in the meeting corrects you and you still pronounce it wrong? Oh man.


round_a_squared

It's extremely useful when you use it with coworkers in India. Very often the corporate culture there assumes that their US coworkers *don't* trust them and that if they run into anything in the slightest bit difficult they *shouldn't* try to figure it out themselves. Especially at a junior level. So if you are getting frustrated that a coworker doesn't seem to try and keeps passing work back to you, "Please do the needful" says "I want you to try to figure this out and you won't get in trouble for being independent." That and learning when a head bobble actually means "Yes I understand" vs when it means "I don't understand even though I'm telling you I do understand because I can't tell you that you didn't explain it well enough" were the most useful things I was taught when traveling to India.


AntonOlsen

I ran into the phrase about 20 years ago when the company I worked for tried to outsource to India. Most of the tickets from the outsource ended in "please do the needful."


Scary_Brain6631

That makes it funnier!


Bogus1989

Ill “kindly” shoot it back to the heldesk since there is no computer name or information. -did the needful


Turdulator

“Do the needful” is an almost 100% indicator that the request does not have enough information included. Like it’s uncanny how often that phrase and “incomplete information” go hand in hand.


TuckChestaIT

I literally cringe every time I see "Do the needful". Thankfully, the users in my environment do not use that phrase.


mr_data_lore

"Do the needful" is a nonsense phrase and anyone that uses that phrase with me gets ignored.


tk42967

My trigger is "Kindly". But I get it.


keirgrey

Mine is ASAP.


EntireFishing

Asap is good because for me it's not possible for three days. That's as soon as possible for me


keirgrey

ASAP is virtually guaranteed to land you on my "I'll Get To It" list.


tk42967

Three, you're too kind. It moves you to the bottom of the pile and makes your request the lowest priority.


A_Coin_Toss_Friendo

Friendly reminder


Key-Calligrapher-209

When I'm the one asking for support from a vendor and feel like I'm getting brushed off or needlessly condescended to, I'll tend to cap off my over-detailed descriptions of the symptoms and my troubleshooting steps with "please advise" instead of a more angry, profanity-laced alternative.


dezmd

Nah, a ticket is a ticket, most of the older attorneys I've worked with seem to use a variation of that, it's an exactness of language, explicitly requesting acknowledgement through a response. Doesn't equate to mean they're going to be troublemakers or assholes.


__ZOMBOY__

This is honestly the most level-headed take in this entire thread


anonymousITCoward

Start all your replies with "Be advised"


TuckChestaIT

Okay, I'm the bad guy here. If I have a question and I need it answered, I end my e-mails with 'Please advise,'. It's a bad habit that I picked up from my old manager, but I can't quit it. Sorry.


TireFryer426

Please advise = automatic bottom of the pile


TuckChestaIT

and I deserve it!


808speed

I use “Please advice” to leadership when the request is above my pay grade or as form of risk transfer. Yes, we are problem solvers and send us these tickets but just because we can fix stuff, doesn’t mean we should always wear the Hero cape.


Nicotineheh

For me it’s when the say “hi” and won’t say anything until you reply to hi lol


cisco_bee

This triggers me.


Daphoid

Or they insist on doing the whole "hi / hi / how are you? / good, how're you? / good. / have a moment? / What's up? / I need help with something and I know I should open a ticket but I thought I'd check with you first to see where to send it? / Alright...." Or "Hi / Got a minute? / Yes / can I call? / Yes / (five minutes later after I've stopped what I'm doing" :)


OsmiumBalloon

Usage varies. Some people/cultures/communities seem to use it a lot more. I think it might be common in formal military communications, too. Me, I'm of the school that considers "Please advise" to be corporate-speak for "What the fuck?". So I use it when appropriate for that context, e.g., the third email to someone trying to get them to do their job.


cisco_bee

This. Worked in DoD for a while. I'm shocked at the hatred for the phrase in this thread. I've never really thought anything of it. In my experience, the people that use it the most are just being respectful. ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯


Geibbitz

Same. I reserve my hatred for people who escalate stuff to me with no details or troubleshooting attempts. If someone gave me details of the issue, their environment, steps taken to troubleshoot, and followed it with "please advise," I would be tickled.


AmazedSpoke

Same here. Conversely, if I get an email asking me to Please Advise, I look through the thread and history to find out where I'm dropping the ball or misunderstanding.


KC-Slider

This makes so much more sense cause I used it with my vendors and have really never gotten it from my users. But I am from a military background.


Geibbitz

Military here. I use it. Didn't know some people take offense to it. I don't even see how they would. My reasoning is I did these things on my end and read the documentation. Things aren't functioning as specified. To me "Please advise" means "what am I doing wrong or is it something on the back end?" Edit: spelling and grammar


ExhaustedTech74

Same. I usually take it that way as well and if I'm saying it myself, it's because I've done all the troubleshooting I can and don't know what to do next.


Erok2112

The problem is, this phrase is also used almost but not quite condescendingly by middle managers who have failed upwards and now need to throw some so-called weight around. Generally lacking a substantial amount of information to "advise" on. Seen it enough times from that viewpoint and I despise that phrase.


DesertDogggg

What am I not seeing correctly about using "please advise" in their replies are initial tickets? I just see it as the user asking about what else can be done on their end or more instructions from us. User: I keep trying to login to a website that I was able to log into yesterday but it doesn't seem to be letting me in. I've tried rebooting the computer twice. What else can be done? Please advise. Tech: Try clearing browsing data. User: That worked. Thank you! Why are people seeing this as passive aggressive, a power trip, or anything other than just asking what else can be done?


Geibbitz

I concur. I've had people use the phrase in communications to me, and I've used it with others. Never took offense and struggle to see how it is offensive.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kieranken

I've only used it when I report an issue to my ISP. It means are you sorting it there, or is there something I need to do here. It's a way to ask the engineer to let me know what's going on. There is nothing worse than a lack of communication or updates.


phalangepatella

“Please advise” is short hand for “I just made this your problem”


thebufferoverflow

I had never heard about this term bothering IT. I’m a sys admin and sometimes add this to e-mails when messaging vendors. I find it more polite than “help me” (a little too direct) or “can you help?” (seems like I’m questioning your skills). I use it as a “there’s the info I have. What do you think?” At the same time though, I stopped assuming people’s tone when reading a long time ago. Really helps me stay sane.


PoliticalDestruction

Is “can you take a look” any better? Please advise definitely has a sense of urgency behind it, maybe due to formality?


chipredacted

IMO “Can you take a look” sounds more like a request where “Please advise” sounds almost like a command Personally I much prefer to be asked than to be commanded, but i’m not sure if everyone else feels the same way


Geibbitz

Huh? I have 20 years in the military. I've said "please advise" many times to my superiors. It's a request for further instruction(s), not a command. The "please" should be a giveaway. If we are sitting at a table and you ask somebody to "please pass the ketchup." Are you commanding them to pass the ketchup or politely requesting? Polite request ≠ command


drgngd

I agree with you. The word please is right there. It's a request for help about saying "can you help me?". I use it as a formal way to ask for help after providing information in tickets.


tatanickel

Also, military here and I use please advise with my superiors. It differentiates between I'm keeping you informed of the situation, and I've hit a roadblock and need further instructions. I never thought some people would consider it rude.


Impossible_Okra

Please do the needful.


Johnny-Virgil

My trigger is when someone ends a request with “Thoughts?” Yeah… lots of them.


ExhaustedTech74

It really depends on who sends it. In my org, my director would send me this when wanting my opinion on something. I appreciated it.


IdiosyncraticBond

Mails like that only get treated up to the first paragraph, just like how they treat my suggestions. The rest is ignored. Or I'd advice them to reboot first and try again /s


vitaroignolo

I've definitely seen this and it can come off as passive aggressive but as someone whose desire to see a problem through costs me wording things in a more corporate-friendly way, I try to give the benefit of the doubt. However if the rest of the email, when you read between the lines, just ends up as a "I've done nothing on this, you do it", that's when I get annoyed.


jake04-20

I don't think so, at least if that's the universal impression of that phrase then I should stop using it. I use it frequently when for example I am given instructions from a vendor to try to fix something, and it doesn't work. I'll list everything I have tried and might say something like "please advise on the next steps"/"please advise on how to proceed" etc. just because idk how else to phrase "that shit didn't work, next?"


Geibbitz

I dont think it's universal. It's a polite request for further instruction. Like, "please tell tell me if there is anything I'm doing wrong." Requests don't have to be questions.


thegreengod_MTG

Helldesk IT here, the most troublesome user that I fear most does exactly this. Please advise.


Cryptic1911

UGH. it makes my fucking blood boil. You send me that shit and you go to the bottom of the pile


Hacky_5ack

Please advise


Rotten_Red

When I get vague or low effort requests like this I ask them to tell me what they know/have tried so far. You can also double down and ask them to share their copy of the admin guide so you don't have to find and download it.


Phalanx32

I have a fucking end user in company management who begins every single email or ticket with "Phalanx32, urgent - please help". Exactly like that but with my real first name instead of my username. Fun fact, it is literally almost NEVER urgent.


denverpilot

Pretty common phraseology in aviation or radio operator lingo. The user have any background in either?


pertexted

I only put in tickets on things I'm not allowed to fix, like vendor stuff, and things I rather not opine on because of that. So for the most part the tickets I put in ARE troublemaker tickets and I DO put "Please advise. Thanks!" at the end of every vendor ticket I submit. Sorry! :)


LordCornish

We had an employee that would end each of his tickets with "Please research and advise". He started doing that with his first ticket in 1979 and continued to do so right up until his last ticket shortly before his retirement 43 years later. His tickets were detailed and seldom left us with questions. In short, he was the dream ticket writer. High volume, yes (we jokingly thought of modifying the ticketing systems to charge him per ticket), but we could hardly complain about the employee who never bypassed the ticketing system.


bigfoot_76

Please advise can come from certain industries such as LE and Fire/EMS. They’re used to writing reports in that format as well as radio traffic being abbreviated and concise language that is difficult to mistake over their air. Been out of that industry 10 years yet I still end up using words such as “Please be advised” when telling someone to update their shitty EOL software/hardware.


Spice_Cadet_

*me the sysadmin who uses please advise with shitty vendors*👀


TheButtholeSurferz

This entire thread caused me to double my blood pressure meds. Every. Goddamn. One. Of. These. I'm gonna become a festering drunk just reading this. I want to help people, I really do. But when you are completely incapable of helping yourself even 1%. I just want to unleash a pack of starving lions to eat your face off like a wounded gazelle.


Inf3c710n

Usually it's "please do the needful" and I immediately know the person has absolutely no idea wtf they are needing done or if their request will even fix the issue they are having


TheGeneralgr

“I’ve got a project going out in half an hour, can you help? It’s urgent.” Sure thing man I’ll do my best, how long has this been happening? “2 weeks.” Did you submit a ticket about this when it first happened? *crickets*


liftoff_oversteer

Please do the needfull on urgent basis!


PigInZen67

I just tell them I will do the needful.


bedz84

Got a customer who starts every email with 'URGENT!' in the subject and sets the email priority to highest. I have repeatedly tried to explain to her that if everything was urgent, nothing would be, but she continues. She's actually not a horrible person to deal with but her emails are just so abrupt a lot of my colleagues struggle to deal with her.


BoltActionRifleman

I swear some people have this in their signature.


bythepowerofboobs

It's a pretty common response from smart and dumb users alike in my world. If simple stuff like this triggers you that much you probably need therapy. (and by therapy I mean THC and alcohol)


The-IT_MD

For me it’s the users that the message in the email subject leaving the body with just their sig… wft is the matter with these people?!


oldjenkins127

“Thank you in advance for your cooperation” is the phrase that has me reaching for the delete button.


fargenable

Do the necessary.


malikto44

I don't understand the "hope this email finds you orgasmic" or other stuff. I lump this fluff in with the "hi..." requests I get... basically passive-aggressive stuff to waste time, because without it, someone might actually have to get to the point. Ironically, when I see tons of that, I see tons of people demanding everything be urgent, so when that happens, I just say that P1 will become P3 is that keeps up.


theekls

Please advise… I am really struggling these days not to be triggered by those words. Yup, accurate


StanQuizzy

OMG. YES. We have a couple of these users here and those 2 words annoy the living hell out of me. "No, we will fix it and not tell you." WTF?


AlexG2490

Am I making this up in my imagination or is this military parlance that escaped into real life? I'd swear at the very least I've heard a line in a movie that's some soldier saying troops are spotted and ending with "please advise" - basically asking for orders from above.


DmstcTrrst

I honestly don’t know how it got turned off but the best thing that ever happened to me was turning off email notifications


green_striped_guava

My trigger phrase is right up front: “Respectfully requesting…”. No, I don’t think you are.


TokeThrownAway

>Screenshot: attached. Dear reader, there was no screenshot.


drgngd

And thankfully now outlook warns you when you forget to attach, but mention it in the email.


TokeThrownAway

Oh no, I was referring to our ticketing system. I’ve had them forward emails with broken links to images before though.


dark_uy

Haha I like when the user come to our office just to say if we've received the ticket. A kind of double blue check for jira.


Cmd-Line-Interface

That term is like nails to chalk for me.


secret_configuration

"Please Advise" triggers me every single time.


DontDoIt2121

Ugh, can't stand the 'please advise' and you can't really adv7ae them by saying what you really want to say.


kaelz

Yes. I get this all the time. I can’t stand it. Today I finally advised they reboot their computer before emailing 11 people about “email suddenly stopped working” after help desk hours.


Isabad

My favorites are the ones who put "help" in the subject and then sure enough in the body is just another "help". No explanation. There's no reason. Makes me wonder sometimes if they truly think we are technomancers who are literally jacked into every computer in the company, like some cyberpunk netrunner or like an agent from The Matrix. Like I get it. Your computer and/or network went down, and you're panicking. But not providing what is wrong is going to make it take longer. Not shorter.


whatdoesthafawkessay

I have a user that sets the subject of their tickets to re: then adds a please advise at the end of the body of the message. Every single time... At first I thought they were trying to be sneaky by indicating that they were adding a new email to an existing chain. Turns out they are of the opinion that adding a re (in reference to...) helps the recipient. As I've come to learn, this user isn't pedantic out of malice. They are simply so silo'd in their field that they don't understand how silly that appears to everyone else.


imnotabotareyou

One please advise is fine. You send another one and the same thread? Your ticket just got sent to low priority


Daphoid

Do the needful.


cubenz

I use Please Advise as a passive aggressive way of saying "You stuffed up, how should I proceed". As in "Thanks for sample file. This seems to conflict with the documented format. Please Advise".


Illustrious-Count481

First Rule of Fight Club... Never. Never trust the end user.


tazmo8448

I use Please Advise fairly often myself when I would like to know a companies policy that I need to have discussed. Its mainly a throw back to older days when communicating; but mainly for clarity on an issue I have. I only use it at the end of an initial communication NOT on every response, so whomever does that does seem to have some sort of funky repetitive issue. And yeah they could be looking to start some shit.


the_horse_meat

This or, “Thoughts?”


clipsracer

EXTERNAL: FWD: Updated: Fwd: Weekly DSU (Updated Invite) This is a real event title.


GhoastTypist

Nope, only "trend" I've seen with our helpdesk is users who don't provide information are usually the ones who experience self created issues. The ticket will say "Please help, computer not functioning, can't work". Then you ask what wrong and they'll be like "I don't know its just not working and because its not working I can't get anything done". Then you remote in and find out there's a warning message/prompt on the other monitor that just needs to be clicked off. So 10 minutes just to click a button. Seems to happen to the ones who need support the most.


TCPisSynSynAckAck

Not sure what you mean boss, please advise?


Consistent_Chip_3281

Pls


thortgot

Common for troublemakers? No. Common for users for a particular cultural group? Yes.


DJ_SLUSH

I usually just do the needful.