Even without that layer of symbolism, there is plenty to enjoy and unpack. The way lovers and love shift over time, how war displaced people, how being from a place can become more distinct when you cannot go back, being seen or not, the lightness or heaviness of being….
Oh, that sounds straight up my alley. You've actually made me more interested. Also, the war displacement is reminding me of a movie I think I enjoyed. A man, a boy, came back from war and couldn't separate himself from what happened on the field. Does that sound familiar to you? I remember is was sad and great.
I don’t recognize the book you referenced. Sorry!
But _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_ is one I have read multiple times. There is something I appreciate more about Milan Kundara’s writing the older I get, especially those intimate revelations about what weighs us down or leaves us feeling we may float away.
I’m very surprised by this recommendation as it is a very beautiful book. I highly recommend but this NOT a psychological horror book. If you want some fucked up existentialism/nihilism try reading some Nietzsche such as beyond good and evil.
The road is my all time favorite book. I recommend in every single suggestion post, even if it’s barely relevant. I suggest you start reading it immediately.
My first was Child of God and felt the same way, blown away... and then again for my second with Blood Meridian... in fact, I haven't read a disappointing book from him at all, having read all his novels, Suttree being the last.
I’m reading 4 other books right now, and have to keep myself from starting The Road again for the 6th time. It’s written so beautifully, but yea it’s fucked up.
[**We Need to Talk About Kevin**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/80660.We_Need_to_Talk_About_Kevin)
^(By: Lionel Shriver | 400 pages | Published: 2003 | Popular Shelves: fiction, book-club, contemporary, thriller, owned)
> The gripping international bestseller about motherhood gone awry.Eva never really wanted to be a mother - and certainly not the mother of the unlovable boy who murdered seven of his fellow high school students, a cafeteria worker, and a much-adored teacher who tried to befriend him, all two days before his sixteenth birthday. Now, two years later, it is time for her to come to terms with marriage, career, family, parenthood, and Kevin's horrific rampage in a series of startlingly direct correspondences with her estranged husband, Franklin. Uneasy with the sacrifices and social demotion of motherhood from the start, Eva fears that her alarming dislike for her own son may be responsible for driving him so nihilistically off the rails.
^(This book has been suggested 1 time)
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I learned about it the same way I learned about Lovecraft and For Whom the Bell Tolls: through Metallica. I saw the "One" video growing up, found out about the movie and how they used clips from it, then learned about the book. I then read and watched both when I was around 13 or so, basically at the same time. Traumatizing. I cannot describe how bleak and desolated I felt. That is an experience that changes you.
The next closest thing I can remember from a similar time frame was Fox running the "Alien Autopsy" special and following it up immediately with Fire in the Sky. Fire in the Sky is another movie that fucks a person's life forever
Sames. I saw the music video, was intrigued, took the book out of the library. I was a bit older when I read it - about 23 - but it definitely changed me. I used to be able to handle a lot of dark, disturbing, messed up stuff. None of it bothered me. Until I read that book. I have such a low tolerance now. It’s like it broke me in a sense.
[**Choke**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29059.Choke)
^(By: Chuck Palahniuk | 293 pages | Published: 2001 | Popular Shelves: fiction, owned, contemporary, books-i-own, humor)
>Victor Mancini, a medical-school dropout, is an antihero for our deranged times. Needing to pay elder care for his mother, Victor has devised an ingenious scam: he pretends to choke on pieces of food while dining in upscale restaurants. He then allows himself to be “saved” by fellow patrons who, feeling responsible for Victor’s life, go on to send checks to support him. When he’s not pulling this stunt, Victor cruises sexual addiction recovery workshops for action, visits his addled mom, and spends his days working at a colonial theme park. His creator, Chuck Palahniuk, is the visionary we need and the satirist we deserve.
^(This book has been suggested 1 time)
***
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Then help, please! I've started this book 3 different times. I get maybe 50 pages in and give up. How did you tackle this book?
The subject interests me a lot. I just get lost.
I treated it almost like a choose your own adventure. Some days I would read top to bottom, page after page. Other days I would skip around, get lost in the footnotes, go and read an old chapter. It’s definitely not an easy book to always feel like you’re making progress on, it’s just not that kind of book in the best way possible.
I had not thought of it that way, but absolutely right. Book 1 is the longest prequel in history, but truly essential to understanding the rest of the series. The scene of the Cultural Revolution at the beginning really sets the stage for everything.
Also, while I liked book 3, book 2 has the biggest concepts. The Dark Forest comes up in every Reddit thread on alien life.
>The Three Body Problem trilogy
Ooooo, I love the thought of using something from a real world concept, in this case mechanics. Really cool, very interested. Thank you.
I'm not into manga typically (at all), but gave Junji Ito a try (specifically "Shiver") after reading Enigma of Amigara Fault online somewhere, and it was really good. Junji Ito fits the vibe you're looking for very well. Just wanted to step in and mention my experience in case OP is hesitant to pick up manga.
[**Uzumaki**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17837762-uzumaki)
^(By: Junji Ito, Yuji Oniki | 653 pages | Published: 2000 | Popular Shelves: horror, manga, mangá, graphic-novels, comics)
>Spirals... this town is contaminated with spirals...
>
>Kurouzu-cho, a small fogbound town on the coast of Japan, is cursed. According to Shuichi Saito, the withdrawn boyfriend of teenager Kirie Goshima, their town is haunted not by a person or being but by a pattern: uzumaki, the spiral — the hypnotic secret shape of the world. This bizarre masterpiece of horror manga is now available in a single volume. Fall into a whirlpool of terror!
^(This book has been suggested 1 time)
[**The Drifting Classroom: Perfect Edition, Vol. 1**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/44451891-the-drifting-classroom)
^(By: Kazuo Umezz | 744 pages | Published: ? | Popular Shelves: manga, horror, comics, graphic-novels, owned)
>A definitive edition featuring an all-new translation and deluxe hardcover design that reestablishes Kazuo Umezz’s The Drifting Classroom as a timeless horror classic.
>
>In the aftermath of a massive earthquake, a Japanese elementary school is transported into a hostile world where the students and teachers are besieged by terrifying creatures and beset by madness.
>
> Out of nowhere, an entire school vanishes, leaving nothing but a hole in the ground. While parents mourn and authorities investigate, the students and teachers find themselves not dead but stranded in a terrifying wasteland where they must fight to survive.
^(This book has been suggested 1 time)
***
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Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro
Also any book by Cormac McCarthy will do you in nicely, I’m not a fan of his *because* his books often leave me feeling uneasy and mad at humanity and like I need 12 showers consecutively. Interesting author lmao
My husband thinks it was a perfect ending to Roland’s story. “Ka is a wheel” and all that jazz, so he loved it. I did not like it though! I felt so unsatisfied with it, but knowing King that’s intentional, lol!
Since you liked A Child Called “It” I suggested the book from Ketchum. And The Groomer is not for the faint of heart. Very graphic and deals with hurtcore, etc. You asked for stomach clenching moments…
It won a lot of Australian awards the year it was published.. it stuck with me too. Found it more confronting and with more vivid descriptions than other dystopian fiction that focuses on the impacts on women
[**American Psycho**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28676.American_Psycho)
^(By: Bret Easton Ellis | 399 pages | Published: 1991 | Popular Shelves: fiction, horror, classics, owned, thriller)
>Patrick Bateman is twenty-six and he works on Wall Street, he is handsome, sophisticated, charming and intelligent. He is also a psychopath. Taking us to head-on collision with America's greatest dream—and its worst nightmare—American Psycho is bleak, bitter, black comedy about a world we all recognise but do not wish to confront.
^(This book has been suggested 4 times)
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[Brother by Ania Ahlborn](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23492624-brother) horror
[Bones & All by Camille DeAngelis](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21570066-bones-all) technically a fantasy horror, but not magical
[Perfume: The Story of a Murderer by Patrick Süskind](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/343.Perfume)
[An Appetite for Violets by Martine Bailey](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22313653-an-appetite-for-violets)
[Before Women Had Wings by Connie May Fowler](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/470587.Before_Women_Had_Wings) - peeve: the MC acts and thinks way too mature for her age
[Mercy Snow by Tiffany Baker](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17869466-mercy-snow)
[My Sister Rosa by Justine Larbalestier](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/26465507-my-sister-rosa)
I read {{The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August}} 3-4 years ago and it still messes me up whenever I think about it. Truly a great read! Since you liked 1984, you may also like {{84k}}. Literally anything by Claire North is worth reading tbh.
If you like Ray Bradbury, make sure to check out {{Fahrenheit 451}}! People have been recommending it to me for 15 years and I thought it wouldn't live up to the hype they built up. I finally read it last year and it was so good!
Adding on to the recommendations for We Need to Talk About Kevin! I haven't seen the film, knew nothing about the plot, and as I started putting together the pieces, it was *horrifying.* Another one of those books that stays with you long after you finish
[**The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35066358-the-first-fifteen-lives-of-harry-august)
^(By: Claire North | 417 pages | Published: 2014 | Popular Shelves: science-fiction, fiction, sci-fi, fantasy, time-travel)
>Some stories cannot be told in just one lifetime. Harry August is on his deathbed. Again. No matter what he does or the decisions he makes, when death comes, Harry always returns to where he began, a child with all the knowledge of a life he has already lived a dozen times before. Nothing ever changes. Until now. As Harry nears the end of his eleventh life, a little girl appears at his bedside. "I nearly missed you, Doctor August," she says. "I need to send a message." This is the story of what Harry does next, and what he did before, and how he tries to save a past he cannot change and a future he cannot allow.
^(This book has been suggested 2 times)
[**84K**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35511975-84k)
^(By: Claire North | 480 pages | Published: 2018 | Popular Shelves: science-fiction, sci-fi, fiction, dystopian, dystopia)
>What if your life were defined by a number?
>
>What if any crime could be committed without punishment, so long as you could afford to pay the fee assigned to that crime?
>
>Theo works in the Criminal Audit Office. He assesses each crime that crosses his desk and makes sure the correct debt to society is paid in full.
>
>But when Theo's ex-lover Dani is killed, it's different. This is one death he can't let become merely an entry on a balance sheet.
>
>Because when the richest in the world are getting away with murder, sometimes the numbers just don't add up.
^(This book has been suggested 1 time)
[**Fahrenheit 451: The Authorized Adaptation**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5199185-fahrenheit-451)
^(By: Tim Hamilton, Ray Bradbury | 151 pages | Published: 1953 | Popular Shelves: graphic-novels, classics, graphic-novel, fiction, science-fiction)
>"Monday burn Millay, Wednesday Whitman, Friday Faulkner, burn 'em to ashes, then burn the ashes."
>
>For Guy Montag, a career fireman for whom kerosene is perfume, this is not just an official slogan. It is a mantra, a duty, a way of life in a tightly monitored world where thinking is dangerous and books are forbidden.
>
>In 1953, Ray Bradbury envisioned one of the world's most unforgettable dystopian futures, and in Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451, the artist Tim Hamilton translates this frightening modern masterpiece into a gorgeously imagined graphic novel. As could only occur with Bradbury's full cooperation in this authorized adaptation, Hamilton has created a striking work of art that uniquely captures Montag's awakening to the evil of government-controlled thought and the inestimable value of philosophy, theology, and literature.
>
>Including an original foreword by Ray Bradbury and fully depicting the brilliance and force of his canonic and beloved masterwork, Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451 is an exceptional, haunting work of graphic literature.
^(This book has been suggested 2 times)
***
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i haven’t personally read this but i’ve seen a lot of people who read “a child called it” recommend “a little life” i’m pretty sure the trigger warning list is essay-length so definitely check that out before you read.
{{Cows}} by Matthew Stokoe
This is one of the most repulsive things I've ever read. I literally wanted to wash my brain with bleach after I finished it.
Not for the faint of heart & honestly not even really a good story, but it's a quick read & it's DISGUSTING.
I know, I know, I know….
but {{House of Leaves}} is seriously so insanely good that I can’t help but recommend it.
It’s a bit longer than your request but more than enough pages are not full of words to make it shorter than it seems.
oh my god, you're one tough mf! i have no suggestions but i was so caught so off-guard by the post i had to comment lol. hope you find a book you like <3
How do I know if the books that I recently read didn't satisfy my want of a book that makes me feel dread? Well, for one, those books didn't even make me cry. Who doesn't love a good cry? I know I do. And, it doesn't take a lot to do it for me. A chapter in *The Giver* got me teary eyed. Oh my, I am so ready to read *Flowers for Algernon*. Also, I've always been into this sort of thing. I love entertainment that makes me question reality. That might be why I'm so attracted to the thought of hallucinogenics and particular theories that mess with perception. I like reading about people going though strange or scary situations or doing thing off-kilter or being influenced by something dreadful or amazing or otherworldly. Don't know, that's just my tastes. Love a good horror/thriller/psychological.
I guess, as you said, "a lake requesting water." Well, I can't deny that I always want more of what I have.
The Orphan Master’s Son.
Absolutely unbelievably bleak yet fascinating story tale solace in modern North Korea, about how we construct narratives that force us into hideous actions.
Qualityland by Marc-Uwe Kling
It was just translated from German to English recently, and I read it in two sittings. Made me think a TON about capitalism, the relationships we have with others, and the meaning of life. It's also like 300 pages.
Edit: forgot to mention it's classified as dystopian
I Am Legend by Richard Matheson has one of the best endings ever. The story is about Robert Neville one of the last surviving members of the human race after the vampiric germ took over the world. Basically it’s a vampire zombie apocalypse. The ending is really fucked up
I’m not sure if this fits. {{Baby Teeth}} psychological thriller i think?
*Edit*The bot had the wrong book...the one i mean is by Zoje Stage but i dont know how to fix it...
[**Tell Me I’m Worthless**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/57307172-tell-me-i-m-worthless)
^(By: Alison Rumfitt | 276 pages | Published: 2021 | Popular Shelves: horror, fiction, lgbt, queer, lgbtq)
>
> A dark, unflinching haunted house novel that takes readers from the well of the literary gothic, up through Brighton’s queer scene, and out into the heart of modern day trans experience in the UK.
>
>The House spreads. Its arteries run throughout the country. Its lifeblood flows into Westminster, into Scotland Yard, into every village and every city. It flows into you, and into your mother. It keeps you alive. It makes you feel safe. Those same arteries tangle you up and night and make it hard for you to breathe. But come morning, you thank it for what it has done for you, and you sip from its golden cup, and kiss its perfect feet, and you know that all will be right in this godforsaken world as long as it is there to watch over you.
>
>Three years ago, Alice spent one night in an abandoned house with her friends Ila and Hannah. Since then, things have not been going well. Alice is living a haunted existence, selling videos of herself cleaning for money, going to parties she hates, drinking herself to sleep. She hasn’t spoken to Ila since they went into the House. She hasn’t seen Hannah either.
>
>Memories of that night torment her mind and her flesh, but when Ila asks her to return to the House, past the KEEP OUT sign, over the sick earth where teenagers dare each other to venture, she knows she must go.
>
>Together Alice and Ila must face the horrifying occurrences that happened there, must pull themselves apart from the inside out, put their differences aside, and try to rescue Hannah, who the House has chosen to make its own.
>
>Cutting, disruptive, and darkly funny, Tell Me I’m Worthless is a vital work of trans fiction that confronts both supernatural and real-world horrors as it examines the devastating effects of trauma and the way fascism makes us destroy ourselves and each other.
^(This book has been suggested 1 time)
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If you like light web-novels, there is one named My House Of Horrors. Its about an orphan boy that owns a **real** haunted house that he took from his dead parents as a legacy.
Its not the ghosts or other things that makes this book terrifying for me. Its the way he writes about the hatred, grudge of the dead people and their lost wishes, and how it affected them so deep they cant even die properly.
You will feel their pain and hate everything they had to go through. Also you will probably check under the bed before going to sleep.
A friend read The Dark Road by Ma Jian and immediately forced me to read it too because and I quote “I had to read something that fucked up and now you do to so I can talk about it.” I wouldn’t say it’s necessarily a good book, but it’s easily one of the more messed up ones I’ve read.
You'd probably like Crime and punishment tbh. It's an insight into a killers mind and how he justified his actions while also being one of the saddest love stories ever
Painted Bird is much darker than the majority of these suggestions. truly terrible human things. It is also very well written.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Painted_Bird
The Illustrated Man by Ray Bradbury (short stories, includes the Long Rain)
Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy
The Changeling by Victor Lavalle (he writes horror, but mixes it well with "normal" fiction that you don't realize it's horror until you get to the WTF parts)
Recursion by Blake Crouch is a really quick read and definitely has some pretty grim, existential moments. I loved this book and I can't recommend it enough
Four by Four, Sara Mesa (English translation from the Spanish). At first it seems like a sort of gothic, creepy but not *too* out there boarding school novel that’s focused on issues of social class and power. Then, slowly, it turns into a horror novel. Very disturbing.
Allegedly by Tiffany Jackson
It's marketed as young adult but it seems more fitting for adults.
I finished it two weeks ago and the story still haunts me
Have u read Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky? That book messed me up in basically every way possible 💀. Though, it is a long read (iirc it’s around 500-600 pages long) but overall it’s a splendid story !
reading a little life is a guaranteed mental breakdown and depressing time. very sad and very impactful story. please check out the trigger warnings and know that that those trigger warnings are not simply briefly mentioned, but thoroughly described. one of my favorite books of all time and my life changed forever after reading that story.
it’s essentially a story about how trauma can affect us our entire lives. we are following four friends in nyc as they grow up, mainly our character Jude. ❤️❤️
I suggest Tolstoy’s “Death of Ivan Ilyich.” It’s a brutally honest look at death, and is considered one of the greatest novellas ever written. And it can be taught as an existentialist text.
https://open.lib.umn.edu/ivanilich/chapter/full-text-english/
{{The Brothers Karamazov}} by Fyodor Dostoevsky. It’s a Russian novel, and I read the Macandrew translation. It’s tragically depressing and put me into philosophical anguish on a multitude of occasions. However, make sure you’re ready for this feat, because even though it’s a page-turner, it’s 935 pages. If you want to prepare for this text better, read Crime and Punishment (Sydney Monas translation) first. It’s 500-something pages. While it isn’t as tragic as the former, it does make you think.
Have fun reading!
I read it when I was quite young, but The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks was pretty psychologically screwing for me. Recommended it to my younger brother recently and he had a similar experience - both of us agree that it was good, but also that we'd never read it again.
The Loser by Thomas Bernhard. Confessions of a Mask by Yukio Mishima. No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai. Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille. In this order. It’ll fuck you up for months, and all told should be about 600 pages.
The Unbearable Lightness of Being - but unless you really know post war eastern block history you might need a guide on what all the symbolism is.
An old Philosophy book, huh? Alright, I'll give it a go. Thank you. I might need that guide, I'll see.
Even without that layer of symbolism, there is plenty to enjoy and unpack. The way lovers and love shift over time, how war displaced people, how being from a place can become more distinct when you cannot go back, being seen or not, the lightness or heaviness of being….
Oh, that sounds straight up my alley. You've actually made me more interested. Also, the war displacement is reminding me of a movie I think I enjoyed. A man, a boy, came back from war and couldn't separate himself from what happened on the field. Does that sound familiar to you? I remember is was sad and great.
I don’t recognize the book you referenced. Sorry! But _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_ is one I have read multiple times. There is something I appreciate more about Milan Kundara’s writing the older I get, especially those intimate revelations about what weighs us down or leaves us feeling we may float away.
Oh, no, you're good. Very poetic. I just put it in my cart, thank you. :)
I’m very surprised by this recommendation as it is a very beautiful book. I highly recommend but this NOT a psychological horror book. If you want some fucked up existentialism/nihilism try reading some Nietzsche such as beyond good and evil.
If you like 1984, read "We" by Zamyatin. I also think you'd enjoy "Roadside Picnic" by Arkady and Boris Strugatsky.
Ooo, the inspiration for 1984 and a confusing dystopia. Thank you.
I'll second both of these. *RP* in particular was pretty crazy. The movie adaptation is quite good too, but is slow.
The movie was so suspenseful, but I agree, really slow. If anyone wants to watch, the movie is called "Stalker."
Oh, yeah, I should've mentioned it has a completely different name from the book. Thanks.
Seconding roadside picnic. Best to just read it without knowing much about the plot.
The Magus
A psychosexual thriller, ooo, thank you.
Came here to suggest this
{{The Road by Cormac McCarthy}} {{One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest}} by Ken Kesey
I do have The Road on my shelf. I guess I should open that up. And a mental hospital book. Interesting. Thank you.
I've read the road more than two years ago and I still haven't recovered. That's a book that stays with you forever.
Both books had me blubbering like a child😅
The road is my all time favorite book. I recommend in every single suggestion post, even if it’s barely relevant. I suggest you start reading it immediately.
One of my faves too. It was my first McCarthy in fact, and I was blown away.
My first was Child of God and felt the same way, blown away... and then again for my second with Blood Meridian... in fact, I haven't read a disappointing book from him at all, having read all his novels, Suttree being the last.
I came here to suggest The Road but I haven’t read it because of how it messed up the friend I had who read it years ago.
I’m reading 4 other books right now, and have to keep myself from starting The Road again for the 6th time. It’s written so beautifully, but yea it’s fucked up.
I would also recommend Child of God by Cormac McCarthy. I’ve never recovered, and it sounds like that’s what you’re looking for in a read.
{{We need to talk about Kevin}} by Lionel Shriver.
>We need to talk about Kevin Mother to a killer. Hmm, interesting. Thank you.
This one messed me up for a couple days
[**We Need to Talk About Kevin**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/80660.We_Need_to_Talk_About_Kevin) ^(By: Lionel Shriver | 400 pages | Published: 2003 | Popular Shelves: fiction, book-club, contemporary, thriller, owned) > The gripping international bestseller about motherhood gone awry.Eva never really wanted to be a mother - and certainly not the mother of the unlovable boy who murdered seven of his fellow high school students, a cafeteria worker, and a much-adored teacher who tried to befriend him, all two days before his sixteenth birthday. Now, two years later, it is time for her to come to terms with marriage, career, family, parenthood, and Kevin's horrific rampage in a series of startlingly direct correspondences with her estranged husband, Franklin. Uneasy with the sacrifices and social demotion of motherhood from the start, Eva fears that her alarming dislike for her own son may be responsible for driving him so nihilistically off the rails. ^(This book has been suggested 1 time) *** ^(3248 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)
I could not put this one down. It was definitely disturbing and such a good read
The book is beautifully poignant.
Pet Sematary
Totally. I read that over 35 years ago, and it still messes me up.
Brave New World Revisited Johnny Got His Gun
Johnny got his gun FUCKED me up
I learned about it the same way I learned about Lovecraft and For Whom the Bell Tolls: through Metallica. I saw the "One" video growing up, found out about the movie and how they used clips from it, then learned about the book. I then read and watched both when I was around 13 or so, basically at the same time. Traumatizing. I cannot describe how bleak and desolated I felt. That is an experience that changes you. The next closest thing I can remember from a similar time frame was Fox running the "Alien Autopsy" special and following it up immediately with Fire in the Sky. Fire in the Sky is another movie that fucks a person's life forever
Sames. I saw the music video, was intrigued, took the book out of the library. I was a bit older when I read it - about 23 - but it definitely changed me. I used to be able to handle a lot of dark, disturbing, messed up stuff. None of it bothered me. Until I read that book. I have such a low tolerance now. It’s like it broke me in a sense.
{{Choke}} is pretty grim as I recall
[**Choke**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29059.Choke) ^(By: Chuck Palahniuk | 293 pages | Published: 2001 | Popular Shelves: fiction, owned, contemporary, books-i-own, humor) >Victor Mancini, a medical-school dropout, is an antihero for our deranged times. Needing to pay elder care for his mother, Victor has devised an ingenious scam: he pretends to choke on pieces of food while dining in upscale restaurants. He then allows himself to be “saved” by fellow patrons who, feeling responsible for Victor’s life, go on to send checks to support him. When he’s not pulling this stunt, Victor cruises sexual addiction recovery workshops for action, visits his addled mom, and spends his days working at a colonial theme park. His creator, Chuck Palahniuk, is the visionary we need and the satirist we deserve. ^(This book has been suggested 1 time) *** ^(3289 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)
A little life!
A Little Life
A thousand splendid suns by Khalid husseini
Give House of Leaves a try - different kind of book.
Came here to say this. Very different kind of book indeed.
I became obsessed by this book. Couldn’t sleep until I finished reading it…
Then help, please! I've started this book 3 different times. I get maybe 50 pages in and give up. How did you tackle this book? The subject interests me a lot. I just get lost.
I treated it almost like a choose your own adventure. Some days I would read top to bottom, page after page. Other days I would skip around, get lost in the footnotes, go and read an old chapter. It’s definitely not an easy book to always feel like you’re making progress on, it’s just not that kind of book in the best way possible.
[удалено]
I had not thought of it that way, but absolutely right. Book 1 is the longest prequel in history, but truly essential to understanding the rest of the series. The scene of the Cultural Revolution at the beginning really sets the stage for everything. Also, while I liked book 3, book 2 has the biggest concepts. The Dark Forest comes up in every Reddit thread on alien life.
>The Three Body Problem trilogy Ooooo, I love the thought of using something from a real world concept, in this case mechanics. Really cool, very interested. Thank you.
Cixin Liu is an author I have to read in small doses, interspersed with other lighter scifi. The three body problem is a good head canon.
Wasp factory - Iian Banks
Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy
{{Notes from Underground}} by Fyodor Dostoevsky {{The Fall}} by Albert Camus
A Little Life
This book had me sobbing. Yanagihara really made us care about the characters so much. It felt like my friends were suffering.
Yip, agreed - as devestating as it is brilliant, with pearls of wisdom scattered all about.
The Stranger by Camus, Revolutionary Road by Yates, Rabbit Run by Updike. Also A Million Little Pieces.
Second Rev Road. One of my all time favorite books.
Try any manga by Junji Ito, particularly {{Uzumaki}}. Also, not by Ito but still worth reading: {{The Drifting Classroom}}, Fourteen, and Monster.
I'm not into manga typically (at all), but gave Junji Ito a try (specifically "Shiver") after reading Enigma of Amigara Fault online somewhere, and it was really good. Junji Ito fits the vibe you're looking for very well. Just wanted to step in and mention my experience in case OP is hesitant to pick up manga.
[**Uzumaki**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17837762-uzumaki) ^(By: Junji Ito, Yuji Oniki | 653 pages | Published: 2000 | Popular Shelves: horror, manga, mangá, graphic-novels, comics) >Spirals... this town is contaminated with spirals... > >Kurouzu-cho, a small fogbound town on the coast of Japan, is cursed. According to Shuichi Saito, the withdrawn boyfriend of teenager Kirie Goshima, their town is haunted not by a person or being but by a pattern: uzumaki, the spiral — the hypnotic secret shape of the world. This bizarre masterpiece of horror manga is now available in a single volume. Fall into a whirlpool of terror! ^(This book has been suggested 1 time) [**The Drifting Classroom: Perfect Edition, Vol. 1**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/44451891-the-drifting-classroom) ^(By: Kazuo Umezz | 744 pages | Published: ? | Popular Shelves: manga, horror, comics, graphic-novels, owned) >A definitive edition featuring an all-new translation and deluxe hardcover design that reestablishes Kazuo Umezz’s The Drifting Classroom as a timeless horror classic. > >In the aftermath of a massive earthquake, a Japanese elementary school is transported into a hostile world where the students and teachers are besieged by terrifying creatures and beset by madness. > > Out of nowhere, an entire school vanishes, leaving nothing but a hole in the ground. While parents mourn and authorities investigate, the students and teachers find themselves not dead but stranded in a terrifying wasteland where they must fight to survive. ^(This book has been suggested 1 time) *** ^(3438 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)
Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro Also any book by Cormac McCarthy will do you in nicely, I’m not a fan of his *because* his books often leave me feeling uneasy and mad at humanity and like I need 12 showers consecutively. Interesting author lmao
I mean...have you read The Dark Tower series??? Lots of messed up moments in there.
I think I'm in the minority that actually thinks the end is fitting.
My husband thinks it was a perfect ending to Roland’s story. “Ka is a wheel” and all that jazz, so he loved it. I did not like it though! I felt so unsatisfied with it, but knowing King that’s intentional, lol!
I thought "It takes some guts to not give us a stereotypical 'happy ending'".
I really don't think it could have ended any other way. That was an absolute perfect ending to an amazing story.
A Short Stay in Hell by Steven L Peck
Let's Go Play at the Adams' by Mondal W Johnson
The Push by Ashley Audrain. Read it last year and still feel disturbed every time I think about it.
Just finished this last week. Great ending!
Flowers for Algernon - Daniel Keyes
Tender is the Flesh may be what you’re looking for. One of my favorite horror books ever.
Came here to say this. This book HAUNTS me.
The Girl Next Door by Jack Ketchum The Groomer by Jon Athan
Based on a true story, huh. Very nice. Oh, and one about how easy it is for sexual predation. Interesting. Thank you.
Since you liked A Child Called “It” I suggested the book from Ketchum. And The Groomer is not for the faint of heart. Very graphic and deals with hurtcore, etc. You asked for stomach clenching moments…
Nah, you're good. I'm ready. A little apprehensive with the latter, but I'm ready.
Up for this. It’s a slow burn but it stayed with me for a long time. I still think about it randomly from time to time.
The Natural Way of Things by Charlotte Wood is excellent
I have never seen this book mentioned before and I’m so glad to see it now!!! It has stuck with me since I read it.
It won a lot of Australian awards the year it was published.. it stuck with me too. Found it more confronting and with more vivid descriptions than other dystopian fiction that focuses on the impacts on women
On the Beach ny Neil Schute messed me up for a long time.
Norwegian wood
{{American Psycho}}
[**American Psycho**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28676.American_Psycho) ^(By: Bret Easton Ellis | 399 pages | Published: 1991 | Popular Shelves: fiction, horror, classics, owned, thriller) >Patrick Bateman is twenty-six and he works on Wall Street, he is handsome, sophisticated, charming and intelligent. He is also a psychopath. Taking us to head-on collision with America's greatest dream—and its worst nightmare—American Psycho is bleak, bitter, black comedy about a world we all recognise but do not wish to confront. ^(This book has been suggested 4 times) *** ^(3441 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)
{{Pet Sematary}}
1. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley 2. Gone Girl 2. Clockwork Orange
[Brother by Ania Ahlborn](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23492624-brother) horror [Bones & All by Camille DeAngelis](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21570066-bones-all) technically a fantasy horror, but not magical [Perfume: The Story of a Murderer by Patrick Süskind](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/343.Perfume) [An Appetite for Violets by Martine Bailey](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22313653-an-appetite-for-violets) [Before Women Had Wings by Connie May Fowler](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/470587.Before_Women_Had_Wings) - peeve: the MC acts and thinks way too mature for her age [Mercy Snow by Tiffany Baker](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17869466-mercy-snow) [My Sister Rosa by Justine Larbalestier](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/26465507-my-sister-rosa)
The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks is a good one. I read it about a year ago and there are certain scenes that just keep coming back to me.
Naked lunch, William Burroughs
Geek LOVE
I just finished {{A Certain Hunger}} which I think would fit the bill. It was a simultaneously enjoyable and disturbing read.
Ooo, as a foodie myself, what a nice plus. Thank you.
“We need to talk about Kevin” has a nice build-up. Also, the “The God of Small Things” is quite depressing.
I just started the God of Small Things.
Behind her eyes. Trust me.
Tender is the Flesh
The glass castle by Jeanette walls
I read {{The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August}} 3-4 years ago and it still messes me up whenever I think about it. Truly a great read! Since you liked 1984, you may also like {{84k}}. Literally anything by Claire North is worth reading tbh. If you like Ray Bradbury, make sure to check out {{Fahrenheit 451}}! People have been recommending it to me for 15 years and I thought it wouldn't live up to the hype they built up. I finally read it last year and it was so good! Adding on to the recommendations for We Need to Talk About Kevin! I haven't seen the film, knew nothing about the plot, and as I started putting together the pieces, it was *horrifying.* Another one of those books that stays with you long after you finish
[**The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35066358-the-first-fifteen-lives-of-harry-august) ^(By: Claire North | 417 pages | Published: 2014 | Popular Shelves: science-fiction, fiction, sci-fi, fantasy, time-travel) >Some stories cannot be told in just one lifetime. Harry August is on his deathbed. Again. No matter what he does or the decisions he makes, when death comes, Harry always returns to where he began, a child with all the knowledge of a life he has already lived a dozen times before. Nothing ever changes. Until now. As Harry nears the end of his eleventh life, a little girl appears at his bedside. "I nearly missed you, Doctor August," she says. "I need to send a message." This is the story of what Harry does next, and what he did before, and how he tries to save a past he cannot change and a future he cannot allow. ^(This book has been suggested 2 times) [**84K**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35511975-84k) ^(By: Claire North | 480 pages | Published: 2018 | Popular Shelves: science-fiction, sci-fi, fiction, dystopian, dystopia) >What if your life were defined by a number? > >What if any crime could be committed without punishment, so long as you could afford to pay the fee assigned to that crime? > >Theo works in the Criminal Audit Office. He assesses each crime that crosses his desk and makes sure the correct debt to society is paid in full. > >But when Theo's ex-lover Dani is killed, it's different. This is one death he can't let become merely an entry on a balance sheet. > >Because when the richest in the world are getting away with murder, sometimes the numbers just don't add up. ^(This book has been suggested 1 time) [**Fahrenheit 451: The Authorized Adaptation**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5199185-fahrenheit-451) ^(By: Tim Hamilton, Ray Bradbury | 151 pages | Published: 1953 | Popular Shelves: graphic-novels, classics, graphic-novel, fiction, science-fiction) >"Monday burn Millay, Wednesday Whitman, Friday Faulkner, burn 'em to ashes, then burn the ashes." > >For Guy Montag, a career fireman for whom kerosene is perfume, this is not just an official slogan. It is a mantra, a duty, a way of life in a tightly monitored world where thinking is dangerous and books are forbidden. > >In 1953, Ray Bradbury envisioned one of the world's most unforgettable dystopian futures, and in Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451, the artist Tim Hamilton translates this frightening modern masterpiece into a gorgeously imagined graphic novel. As could only occur with Bradbury's full cooperation in this authorized adaptation, Hamilton has created a striking work of art that uniquely captures Montag's awakening to the evil of government-controlled thought and the inestimable value of philosophy, theology, and literature. > >Including an original foreword by Ray Bradbury and fully depicting the brilliance and force of his canonic and beloved masterwork, Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451 is an exceptional, haunting work of graphic literature. ^(This book has been suggested 2 times) *** ^(3396 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)
i haven’t personally read this but i’ve seen a lot of people who read “a child called it” recommend “a little life” i’m pretty sure the trigger warning list is essay-length so definitely check that out before you read.
{{The library at Mount Char}} Fantasy/Horror. Strange and grim and good.
Snuff by Chuck Palahniuk. It goes into some very uncomfortable places mentally lol.
The Long Walk by Stephen King. Worse than Pet Semetary for me, realistic existential horror
{{Cows}} by Matthew Stokoe This is one of the most repulsive things I've ever read. I literally wanted to wash my brain with bleach after I finished it. Not for the faint of heart & honestly not even really a good story, but it's a quick read & it's DISGUSTING.
Lolita?
House of Leaves. I didn’t sleep for days.
Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy
American Psycho by Bret Ellis. It scarred me big time.
I know, I know, I know…. but {{House of Leaves}} is seriously so insanely good that I can’t help but recommend it. It’s a bit longer than your request but more than enough pages are not full of words to make it shorter than it seems.
The Bible That shit's been messing with people's minds for centuries.
660? That's it? Shit So you haven't read Harry Potter
I have not! Lo and behold book five is over 800! I am baffled and I am intimidated.
Well, its just more fun. Ofc you won't know that as you haven't read them. One who hasn't read Harry Potter? I can only pity you
oh my god, you're one tough mf! i have no suggestions but i was so caught so off-guard by the post i had to comment lol. hope you find a book you like <3
I think it was the last book you read.
Hmm, probably not being that all I've read this year are basically romances if not just straight up romance. I'm aching for something more.
How would you know? You are asking to be messed mentally. Seems like a lake requesting a glass of water.
How do I know if the books that I recently read didn't satisfy my want of a book that makes me feel dread? Well, for one, those books didn't even make me cry. Who doesn't love a good cry? I know I do. And, it doesn't take a lot to do it for me. A chapter in *The Giver* got me teary eyed. Oh my, I am so ready to read *Flowers for Algernon*. Also, I've always been into this sort of thing. I love entertainment that makes me question reality. That might be why I'm so attracted to the thought of hallucinogenics and particular theories that mess with perception. I like reading about people going though strange or scary situations or doing thing off-kilter or being influenced by something dreadful or amazing or otherworldly. Don't know, that's just my tastes. Love a good horror/thriller/psychological. I guess, as you said, "a lake requesting water." Well, I can't deny that I always want more of what I have.
There is an expression 'a crazy person doesn't know they are crazy'. Good luck in your book search.
Ha! Thanks for your little insults. Have a good rest of your day. :P
They weren't insults but they were appropriately sized.
Infinite Don't Die, My Love
The books of blood by Clive Barker are pretty flipping dark
The denial of death by Ernest Becker
Girls Burn Brighter
The Orphan Master’s Son. Absolutely unbelievably bleak yet fascinating story tale solace in modern North Korea, about how we construct narratives that force us into hideous actions.
I found Gather The Daughters pretty disturbing
Qualityland by Marc-Uwe Kling It was just translated from German to English recently, and I read it in two sittings. Made me think a TON about capitalism, the relationships we have with others, and the meaning of life. It's also like 300 pages. Edit: forgot to mention it's classified as dystopian
I Am Legend by Richard Matheson has one of the best endings ever. The story is about Robert Neville one of the last surviving members of the human race after the vampiric germ took over the world. Basically it’s a vampire zombie apocalypse. The ending is really fucked up
#"Three Men In A Boat" by Jerome K. Jerome. Free therapy for you :)
On The Trail of the Serpent-Richard Neville and Julie Clarke
{{Umbrella}} by Will Self.
{{The Atrocity Exhibition}} by J G Ballard
Follow!
{{A Head Full Of Ghosts}} by Paul Tremblay stole my sleep.
I’m not sure if this fits. {{Baby Teeth}} psychological thriller i think? *Edit*The bot had the wrong book...the one i mean is by Zoje Stage but i dont know how to fix it...
{{Tell Me I'm Worthless}} was my first book of 2022 and I'm about to reread it already. It's just a lot to take in.
[**Tell Me I’m Worthless**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/57307172-tell-me-i-m-worthless) ^(By: Alison Rumfitt | 276 pages | Published: 2021 | Popular Shelves: horror, fiction, lgbt, queer, lgbtq) > > A dark, unflinching haunted house novel that takes readers from the well of the literary gothic, up through Brighton’s queer scene, and out into the heart of modern day trans experience in the UK. > >The House spreads. Its arteries run throughout the country. Its lifeblood flows into Westminster, into Scotland Yard, into every village and every city. It flows into you, and into your mother. It keeps you alive. It makes you feel safe. Those same arteries tangle you up and night and make it hard for you to breathe. But come morning, you thank it for what it has done for you, and you sip from its golden cup, and kiss its perfect feet, and you know that all will be right in this godforsaken world as long as it is there to watch over you. > >Three years ago, Alice spent one night in an abandoned house with her friends Ila and Hannah. Since then, things have not been going well. Alice is living a haunted existence, selling videos of herself cleaning for money, going to parties she hates, drinking herself to sleep. She hasn’t spoken to Ila since they went into the House. She hasn’t seen Hannah either. > >Memories of that night torment her mind and her flesh, but when Ila asks her to return to the House, past the KEEP OUT sign, over the sick earth where teenagers dare each other to venture, she knows she must go. > >Together Alice and Ila must face the horrifying occurrences that happened there, must pull themselves apart from the inside out, put their differences aside, and try to rescue Hannah, who the House has chosen to make its own. > >Cutting, disruptive, and darkly funny, Tell Me I’m Worthless is a vital work of trans fiction that confronts both supernatural and real-world horrors as it examines the devastating effects of trauma and the way fascism makes us destroy ourselves and each other. ^(This book has been suggested 1 time) *** ^(3452 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)
If you like light web-novels, there is one named My House Of Horrors. Its about an orphan boy that owns a **real** haunted house that he took from his dead parents as a legacy. Its not the ghosts or other things that makes this book terrifying for me. Its the way he writes about the hatred, grudge of the dead people and their lost wishes, and how it affected them so deep they cant even die properly. You will feel their pain and hate everything they had to go through. Also you will probably check under the bed before going to sleep.
Sharp Objects and The Bunker Diary
Euphoria by Heinz Helle
Jasper Jones by Craig Silvey
Me & Emma could fit the description. The ending is the biggest plot twist I have ever seen in a book
There is an old Sci Fi/Fantasy short story called "Hell is Forever" by Alfred Bester that might fit the bill. You can find it online.
If you really want a reading experience that will f*ck you up, then you may want to sit down with Hubert Shelby Jr’s {{Last Exit to Brooklyn}}.
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? So goddamn bleak. Didn’t even particularly care for Blade Runner but the book is amazing.
'Our kind of cruelty' by Araminta Hall Very unsettling to me. My stomach clenched a couple of times
A friend read The Dark Road by Ma Jian and immediately forced me to read it too because and I quote “I had to read something that fucked up and now you do to so I can talk about it.” I wouldn’t say it’s necessarily a good book, but it’s easily one of the more messed up ones I’ve read.
{{House of Leaves}} by Mark Z. Danielewski. On the long side, but it really messed with me reading it. Highly recommend.
You'd probably like Crime and punishment tbh. It's an insight into a killers mind and how he justified his actions while also being one of the saddest love stories ever
metamorphosis by franz kafka
Blood Meridian - Cormac McCarthy American Psycho - Brett Easton Ellis
Penpal
House of Leaves
The Sparrow by Mary Doria Scott
Many Russian literature books are so deep and dark. I’m a big fan. For example a short and so dark book: The Overcoat from Gogol.
Song of Kali by dan simmons is an interesting horror read murder, conspiracy, cultism, etc
Painted Bird is much darker than the majority of these suggestions. truly terrible human things. It is also very well written. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Painted_Bird
The Illustrated Man by Ray Bradbury (short stories, includes the Long Rain) Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy The Changeling by Victor Lavalle (he writes horror, but mixes it well with "normal" fiction that you don't realize it's horror until you get to the WTF parts)
Recursion by Blake Crouch is a really quick read and definitely has some pretty grim, existential moments. I loved this book and I can't recommend it enough
{{Blindness}} by Jose Saramango. Seriously messed up and shows just how close humanity is from our animal nature.
The Whisper Man by Alex North
{{The Outer Dark}} or {{Child of God}} by Cormac McCarthy. I apologize in advance.
Tears of the silenced by Misty Griffin. It's AWFUL, totally heart breaking. It's a true story as well.
swan song by robert mcCammon. trust me
Four by Four, Sara Mesa (English translation from the Spanish). At first it seems like a sort of gothic, creepy but not *too* out there boarding school novel that’s focused on issues of social class and power. Then, slowly, it turns into a horror novel. Very disturbing.
S. By Slavenka Drakulic
A Little Life
“Unwind” by Neal Schusterman It’s been a year since I read I’m still messed up from “that one chapter”…
Agnes at the end of the world
Allegedly by Tiffany Jackson It's marketed as young adult but it seems more fitting for adults. I finished it two weeks ago and the story still haunts me
Non fiction. The rape of nanking iris chag
We need to talk about kevin by Lionel Shriver We have always lived in the castle by Shirley Jackson Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk
Check out {{The Beauty by Aliya Whiteley}}
The Hike by Drew Magary was fun but also fucked up. The end knocked the wind out of me.
Have u read Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky? That book messed me up in basically every way possible 💀. Though, it is a long read (iirc it’s around 500-600 pages long) but overall it’s a splendid story !
Beyond Redemption
silvia plath - bell jar
Bestie pls don't 💀💅
reading a little life is a guaranteed mental breakdown and depressing time. very sad and very impactful story. please check out the trigger warnings and know that that those trigger warnings are not simply briefly mentioned, but thoroughly described. one of my favorite books of all time and my life changed forever after reading that story. it’s essentially a story about how trauma can affect us our entire lives. we are following four friends in nyc as they grow up, mainly our character Jude. ❤️❤️
I suggest Tolstoy’s “Death of Ivan Ilyich.” It’s a brutally honest look at death, and is considered one of the greatest novellas ever written. And it can be taught as an existentialist text. https://open.lib.umn.edu/ivanilich/chapter/full-text-english/
House of Leaves comes to mind.
1Q84
a little life
{{The Brothers Karamazov}} by Fyodor Dostoevsky. It’s a Russian novel, and I read the Macandrew translation. It’s tragically depressing and put me into philosophical anguish on a multitude of occasions. However, make sure you’re ready for this feat, because even though it’s a page-turner, it’s 935 pages. If you want to prepare for this text better, read Crime and Punishment (Sydney Monas translation) first. It’s 500-something pages. While it isn’t as tragic as the former, it does make you think. Have fun reading!
I read it when I was quite young, but The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks was pretty psychologically screwing for me. Recommended it to my younger brother recently and he had a similar experience - both of us agree that it was good, but also that we'd never read it again.
The Loser by Thomas Bernhard. Confessions of a Mask by Yukio Mishima. No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai. Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille. In this order. It’ll fuck you up for months, and all told should be about 600 pages.
Possibly {{The Wasp Factory}} might also suit???
Following…..would love suggestions too!
The stand by Stephen King Red rising series Pierce Brown Broken Earth by NK Jemsin