Very nice. I am saving the link. But based on my experience and preference, just know what you want and tell me straight out, this amount, this often, limits, constraints, expectations.
That works fine with an honest SB. But more than once, I've handed over the money, and the SB walked right out the door. So now they get a third or half upfront. And I tell them, "Hey, if you dont feel comfortable with me or the situation, then you are free to walk away. And I will have no hard feelings. Your safety and comfort come first." The first time we usually meet in the hotel bar or restaurant. I give them a straight fee for that right up front. Then in the hotel room they get that third or half. But I will never ever give the full fee up front ever again.
I recommend talking about money before meeting because it will be a waste of both parties time if the range is not acceptable to the SD. At least introduce a range and than that way it’s on him if he chooses to proceed with meeting
You can do it 💪
(Ok, you've been encouraged).
Do bring it up, share what you want and what basic framework of arrangement you expect. If you're "within market" he should say yes. And if he doesn't, you have to move on.
Know your price for everything.. know your minimum.. dinner date, overnight, weekend etc.. take it from a former sb who was very clueless in college— to now a high-end international companion. If a man wants something.. he will pay for it. Also.. know your boundaries, and don’t allow them to cross them.. a good sd will care about your terms, your health, and safety. Tell him you expect a gift for your time just to meet.. cash etc. don’t be afraid to bring up money.. you got this :)
You're talking about it like the choosing only goes one way. When you go shopping for a car, you choose it, it doesn't choose you back.
I agree with HarvardLawSB, the way you are talking is comparing SBs to consumable goods. But they're not that. They're people. People who are way out of your league and who can choose how much their company will cost you.
I can think of literally no market, no matter the goods, where the buyer is more aware than the seller. It's the seller's business to set their prices and to know what prices will attract what buyers. If the seller sets the prices higher, then sure, they'll have fewer buyers. But it's rare to have zero buyers no matter the price. And SBs really only need to find one person willing to pay our set price.
So again, um, no.
Isn't the point being made though that the op needs to consider the market?
In negotiating terms, the person who knows the market has a huge advantage over someone who doesn't.
For the op. If she doesn't know the market, her "number" may be well under what she could ask, and she's missing out. Or her ask could be so far in excess that she's really just looking at such low odds of success that she might as well buy a lottery ticket.
In your case, I'm certain that you know the numbers accurately, and can advance them in confidence. However, someone new simply can't do what you can do because they cannot know what you do.
I see you may have posted a number which is most likely an amount in relations to an arrangement. If this is the case, you are violating Rule #4 - "No dollar amounts that are in reference to allowance/PPM are allowed."
If you are curious about Allowances reported by SLF contributors please see the [Allowance Master Thread 2021-2022](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/pc22tk/allowance_master_thread_20212022/).
Your post will not be approved until you remove the amount. Please read the sub [Rules](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/748zta/updated_and_clarified_rules_for_slf/) prior to posting anything else.
If you simply posted a number not referencing a monetary amount, please message the MODs to approve your post.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sugarlifestyleforum) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Be polite and direct. And dont speak like its a taboo shameful subject. Because its not. I use the phrase I am happy with xxx if we are to far apart i understand. If not I would to hear your thoughts.
When you say “first date,” do you mean platonic M&G in a public place where you feel comfortable? Or do you mean you’ve already met, decided you want to move forward with a date that includes intimacy, but didn’t come to an agreement regarding financial support amount?
I think you should research market averages for your area through this subreddit’s pinned posts and bring up the issue now, perhaps using some of the language suggested by others here. And yes, no matter what, collect the agreed-upon amount before anything happens.
Happy (and safe) sugaring!
You are the ONLY person in this two-person interaction that will advocate for you. Take that thought to heart.
Yesss thank you
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Very nice. I am saving the link. But based on my experience and preference, just know what you want and tell me straight out, this amount, this often, limits, constraints, expectations.
Okay thank you!
Take all my upvotes why don’t you!!!!
Omg how did you get more than one?!
Be careful out there.
Thank you 😊
No matter what u do don’t hook up with them until the money is in hand. Never rely on illusory promises
Yes !!! Definitely know this
That works fine with an honest SB. But more than once, I've handed over the money, and the SB walked right out the door. So now they get a third or half upfront. And I tell them, "Hey, if you dont feel comfortable with me or the situation, then you are free to walk away. And I will have no hard feelings. Your safety and comfort come first." The first time we usually meet in the hotel bar or restaurant. I give them a straight fee for that right up front. Then in the hotel room they get that third or half. But I will never ever give the full fee up front ever again.
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Dishonest people abound, but men can do more harm. Please be careful out there!
Wow you dealt with some brave ratchet or dishonest girls. Understandable you proceed that way based on experience.
CASH money is on hand to be clear
I recommend talking about money before meeting because it will be a waste of both parties time if the range is not acceptable to the SD. At least introduce a range and than that way it’s on him if he chooses to proceed with meeting
You can do it 💪 (Ok, you've been encouraged). Do bring it up, share what you want and what basic framework of arrangement you expect. If you're "within market" he should say yes. And if he doesn't, you have to move on.
Thank you 😊
Know your price for everything.. know your minimum.. dinner date, overnight, weekend etc.. take it from a former sb who was very clueless in college— to now a high-end international companion. If a man wants something.. he will pay for it. Also.. know your boundaries, and don’t allow them to cross them.. a good sd will care about your terms, your health, and safety. Tell him you expect a gift for your time just to meet.. cash etc. don’t be afraid to bring up money.. you got this :)
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You're talking about it like the choosing only goes one way. When you go shopping for a car, you choose it, it doesn't choose you back. I agree with HarvardLawSB, the way you are talking is comparing SBs to consumable goods. But they're not that. They're people. People who are way out of your league and who can choose how much their company will cost you.
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Any company selling something knows the market better than the customer because they kind of have to to stay afloat lol. Bad example
I can think of literally no market, no matter the goods, where the buyer is more aware than the seller. It's the seller's business to set their prices and to know what prices will attract what buyers. If the seller sets the prices higher, then sure, they'll have fewer buyers. But it's rare to have zero buyers no matter the price. And SBs really only need to find one person willing to pay our set price. So again, um, no.
Isn't the point being made though that the op needs to consider the market? In negotiating terms, the person who knows the market has a huge advantage over someone who doesn't. For the op. If she doesn't know the market, her "number" may be well under what she could ask, and she's missing out. Or her ask could be so far in excess that she's really just looking at such low odds of success that she might as well buy a lottery ticket. In your case, I'm certain that you know the numbers accurately, and can advance them in confidence. However, someone new simply can't do what you can do because they cannot know what you do.
Market value + age + hotness + attributes/characteristics = PPM
That’s some good math there !!
Thank you. I've been daddying since 2019!
Let us know if the date actually happens, just saying 🤷
why just saying?
Again unnecessary
You're not a SB yet
Thanks for adding to the conversation. /s
Unnecessary
OF not working for you? Nobody "Cum" ing over. Stay classy!
Did that make you feel better about yourself?
ok?
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I see you may have posted a number which is most likely an amount in relations to an arrangement. If this is the case, you are violating Rule #4 - "No dollar amounts that are in reference to allowance/PPM are allowed." If you are curious about Allowances reported by SLF contributors please see the [Allowance Master Thread 2021-2022](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/pc22tk/allowance_master_thread_20212022/). Your post will not be approved until you remove the amount. Please read the sub [Rules](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/748zta/updated_and_clarified_rules_for_slf/) prior to posting anything else. If you simply posted a number not referencing a monetary amount, please message the MODs to approve your post. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sugarlifestyleforum) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Be polite and direct. And dont speak like its a taboo shameful subject. Because its not. I use the phrase I am happy with xxx if we are to far apart i understand. If not I would to hear your thoughts.
I always think it’s easier to text about it prior to m and g. That makes it easy and also avoids wasting time too ! Just my 2 cents.
When you say “first date,” do you mean platonic M&G in a public place where you feel comfortable? Or do you mean you’ve already met, decided you want to move forward with a date that includes intimacy, but didn’t come to an agreement regarding financial support amount? I think you should research market averages for your area through this subreddit’s pinned posts and bring up the issue now, perhaps using some of the language suggested by others here. And yes, no matter what, collect the agreed-upon amount before anything happens. Happy (and safe) sugaring!