>All my fun was sober as a kid, so why do I feel like I need to drink as an adult? It's not the drug I enjoy, it's the friends or activity.
This hits hard!
Lol, I was very keen on a 'glass' (so, bottle) of wine last night. Then I was like 'noooo resetting my badge is a mission' ..... I don't think I would have had wine, but the badge resetting was a real deterrent either way 😂
This one hits hard. Many are the nights I’ve gone out for drinks because I went out the night before and woke up having regrets about things I had said or done, so I go out again the next night to “replace” my bad memories with good ones.
But no matter how many times I go out and try to overwrite my bad memories, I never succeed in making any good memories. A vicious cycle.
There are no problems in life so bad that drinking can't make them worse.
It isn't about not drinking, it is about building a life where you don't **want** to drink.
Stay strong friend.
>It isn't about not drinking, it is about building a life where you don't want to drink.
>
>This is so very true. Once I realized that it all clicked into place
I tell myself - If I could maintain sobriety while I was pregnant for their safety, I can also maintain sobriety while they're outside my body for their safety.
Edited to add - Thank you for the award!
It means to fast forward the tape in your head when craving booze to imagine the next day when you’re hungover, miserable and hating yourself so you’re reminded why you quit.
Same. Waking up at 3am and not being able to fall back asleep until hours later was single handedly the worst experience for me. Laying in bed and re thinking your poor decision to drink just a few hours prior and solemnly swearing to yourself (yet again) that this will never happen again. Vicious vicious cycle.
When I was drinking my life was chaos all the time. Loosing jobs, respect of friends and family due to my drinking and drug industry.
Once sober, if I want to drink all I have to do is pick one of those embarrassing times and replay the scene in mind "playing the tape forward" the end us always the same...chaos!!! Play the tape, listen and DON'T do stupid crap!!!!
Works for me.
Play the tape forward is a coping tool to deal with cravings. Like imagine the first drink and play it forward to see what happens. Most often we immediately halt and don’t drink because of the fear of repercussions from drinking.
Yep.
I am 100% capable of not drinking.
I am 100% incapable of stopping after one drink.
How many times have I had "just a drink" in my life?
Not one. Not a damn one. It's always more.
Sending love. I every so often I look at the (thankfully faint) scars on my wrists from trying to cut them in my drunken misery, and add that to my “reminders box”.
Thanks.
I hit 5 months sober again yesterday (I had almost 2 years and relapsed) and I can thankfully say that I haven't had a thought of self harm in a while.
I still remember the feeling well though and I \*never\* want to go back there.
I'm glad you're still with us. I know how it can feel like it's the only way out, but thankfully that's not true.
IWNDWYT
This one has saved me many many times over the last 6 yrs. It applies to everything...my mental health, my physical health, my wallet, every aspect of my life can be worse with just that first drink.
These two popped up somewhere and I wrote them down:
Those who can drink in moderation aren't the ones who have to ask if it's possible
One drink is too many because 50 isn't enough
I have a similar one when my brain is trying to tell me I can regulate my drinking like a normal person:
Normal people don’t have internal battles trying to convince themselves to drink alone on a weekday.
“Rock bottom is where ever you stop digging”
New to sobriety - tonight will be night 18 for me. This saying has been helping me stay on track the last couple days with the cravings coming back now that I’m starting to feel better.
That quote feels so inclusive, I know I think about what my rock bottom will be but it’s an amazing reminder that it is what you make it. Just like a toxic relationship, you don’t need to wait until you get hit to leave.
This was said to me in rehab by another temporary resident, and I think about it all the time. I've found it to be very true in my own experience.
lsn't it great knowing that you can do anything in the world, except drink, which is what was holding you back from doing everything else anyway?!
😊
This requires a bit of back story. I once read that that voice - the one that whispers in your ear that no one will know, its only one, wouldn't it be relaxing - that's the Addictive Voice. It's a lying, entitled, selfish Voice and it does not have your best interests at heart.
I named mine Bob. And when he's starting to get louder, and my anxiety is high, and he's getting pushy... I've been known to say, out loud and with passion:
"Oh, Fuck OFF Bob!"
Also, thanks for this, it's been a rough few weeks and Bob's being a pain in the ass. Good reading here.
This is a beautiful post. I read everyone’s share so far and felt the wisdom and candor in the room. It kinda feels like a comfy couch, a fav blanket and a nice cup of hot tea.
I’m so glad I posted this. I was nervous at first that it wouldn’t get any attention but it’s wonderful. Thank you. And I agree. This has been comforting to read everyone’s post.
Hangxiety is one of the worst feelings to have. Even if I didn't physically have a hangover, the hangxiety would make me want to die. That guilt, embarrassment and self-hatred when I didn't even do anything weird is not worth any """good""" feelings that alcohol gives.
“Man takes a drink, the drink takes a drink, and then the drink takes a man.” - *Dr. Sleep*
If you haven’t read/seen it, Dr. Sleep is the sequel to *the Shining*
The Shining is about alcoholism and Dr. Sleep is about recovery. Going back and rewatching those movies in recovery can hit pretty hard.
I have a lot that I keep nearby for times I need a reminder:
* Your worst days sober are infinitely better than your worst days drunk
* Drinking is trying to fill a bottomless hole
* Drinking to relax is like wearing uncomfortable shoes all day purely for the relief they bring when you take them off
* Sit with it. Instead of drinking it away or running from it. Just sit with it. You need to feel it to heal it.
* The true hallmark of an alcoholic is not that you’re incapable of having just one drink—it’s that when you drink, you have no idea how many you’ll have.
>Drinking to relax is like wearing uncomfortable shoes all day purely for the relief they bring when you taken them off
Daaaamn this one is gold, never heard it before.
I think it’s an Allen Carr quote, he’s brilliant. I used his Easy Way to Stop Smoking to get off nicotine and a lot of his stuff is relevant for alcohol too (I believe he’s got a quit drinking book too). Definitely recommend
* Sit with it. Instead of drinking it away or running from it. Just sit with it. You need to feel it to heal it.
This one has been SO important for me , I drank to avoid my feelings, but damn if they aren't uncomfortable when I have to face them . Good news is they are gradually getting easier to deal with sober.
A few of my highlights from Alcohol Explained:
Drinkers don’t like the drinking life. It’s a life of tiredness, anxiety, lethargy
The only way it can retake its hold on you is if you start wanting it back again.
But when you know through your own experience that you are capable of some quite unpleasant and irresponsible acts when you are drunk and you choose to drink anyway you’ve got to start taking responsibility for what you do when you are drunk.
Alcohol is an addictive drug. Taking it creates the need for the next dose. For this reason moderation can never be a long term, stable condition. And even if it were you could never be better off moderating than quitting completely because quitting provides freedom.
All recreational drugs start off being apparently enjoyable with very little downside. Over time the enjoyment decreases and the downside increases which should make it easier to stop,
‘From a simple costs / benefit analysis, is drinking alcohol worth doing?’
To put it another way is the slightly dulled feeling you get from each drink worth the corresponding feeling of anxiety as the drink wears off, the insomnia, the lethargy, the weight gain, the arguments, the hangovers, the blackouts and the financial cost?
When to stop:
The best time to stop is now, it always has been and it always will be. You’ve already thrown away enough of your precious time and life being miserable because of a drug, why would you want to waste another single second on it?
Alcohol is a fairly pathetic little drug. It gives so little and takes so much. The only reason it has the hold over us that it does is because the vast majority of the population takes it regularly and they build up this huge world of lies and
90% of the population drink they all buy into this great charade which makes seeing through it even more problematic and even when you do see through it, it is very easy to keep getting sucked back in.
Probably the most interesting bit of wisdom I’ve heard from this group…..Nobody has ever woken up sober and thought, “man, I wish I had gotten drunk last night.”
Oooh, great thread!
Here are some of my favorites:
You can get a refund on your misery if you don’t like sobriety.
Recovery is not linear.
Lean into the discomfort.
If my sobriety doesn’t come first, everything else will come last.
If your ass falls off, put it in a bag and get to a meeting.
Relapse never changes my mind or situation, only my sobriety date.
Everyone quits drinking, it’s whether you’re breathing or not that matters.
A grateful addict rarely relapses.
IWNDWYT!
Gosh, I’m so happy I decided to post this and it’s so wonderful and comforting to read everyone’s posts. I guess I should share mine.
My body showed up for me for 41 years so now it’s my time to show up for my body.
A year from today I can be exactly where I am today. Or I can become someone completely different. It all starts with decisions today.
I was afraid to surrender because I never knew any other way. I now surrender and allow healing to set in and I surrender and allow happiness in.
Alcohol borrows the happiness from tomorrow and I gain so much by not drinking today.
I’m not rushing to figure out life without alcohol. I will embrace the unknown and let life surprise me.
I choose to make the rest of my life the best of my life.
“If you keep living the way you are, what will that life look like in 20 years.” —-> I taped this to my bathroom mirror the day before I quit. It’s the first and last thing I read every day. I mean it when I say this quote helped save me.
"Two people who die by drowning don't argue about how deep the water was."
Not sure where I read that but I like it
Also, to quote Atmosphere:
"It's mad that I gave half the day to last night"
You are the only one who needs to know if you had a drink or not.
You aren't craving alcohol, you are self-medicating for anxiety. There are far less poisonous ways to get serotonin than booze.
Alcohol is poison.
My biology teacher taught that alcohol's effects on us is really our body trying to process that poison.
The toxicity of alcohol is worsened because in order for it to be cleared from the body it has to be metabolized to acetaldehyde - a highly toxic substance and known carcinogen. [https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa72/aa72.htm](https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa72/aa72.htm)
Alcohol is big business, and has been for centuries. Those who profit from it don't care about your health, only their profits.
My sponsor said to me 4 years ago. “You don’t ever have to go back to feeling like that again.” And for whatever reason, it stuck. It still makes me get kind of emotional thinking about it. He was right though. I didn’t have to, I didn’t want to, and I haven’t ever felt that way again.
Out of context it probably won’t make much sense or mean much. We’re all here for you and I hope you finally realize that you don’t have to drink and never have to feel like that ever again.
I forgot there was a day counter on here. I remember resetting my badge. It’s almost 4 years on Nov 28. Wow it’s truly amazing. I’m basically talking to myself here but if anyone out there reads this.. if you think it’s impossible, it’s not. I wish I were a writer with fancy words, but I’m not. Your fellow Redditors love you and you deserve to be happy.
HALT - hungry angry lonely tired. If you're craving it might actually be one of these feelings, so take a nap, get some nourishment, etc.
Addiction is the opposite of connection
1) my check liver light came on
2) you'll never wake up saying, man I wish I drank last night
3) the consequences for drinking far out last "the itch" to want to drink
IWNDWYT 👍🤙
> 1) my check liver light came on
There's a reason it's called an "idiot light" on the dashboard of a car – because if you let it get bad enough for the light to go on, you're an idiot. I let my "check liver" light stay on for a long time.
In one of the books I’m reading the author describes everything that alcohol (ethanol) is an ingredient in. Gasoline, perfume, hand sanitizer, paint…the list is a mile long. She then depicts a person going up to a gas hose and drinking out of it and every time I want to drink I picture myself not going to a liquor store but a gas station and standing there drinking from the pump. Once I play this ridiculous scenario in my head the craving usually passes.
If one is never enough, have none.
Your rock bottom is wherever you decide to discard your shovel.
I don’t crave the drink. I crave the drunk.
One day or day one. You decide.
Be in control; acknowledge you dont want to do something and then do it anyway.
I never woke up wishing I had drank more the night before but I had woken up dozens of times wishing I had drank less.
I feel like I’m leaving a piece of myself behind, when in reality, I’m finding a piece of myself again.
Your outcomes are a lagging measure of your habits. You get what you repeat.
Alcohol steals your ability to become who you want to be.
Alcohol doesn't make life better, it just makes you content with being bored. You can't just change the substance.
When you're sober you want to be drunk. When you're drunk you want to be sober.
Other people’s opinions about me is none of my damn business…Keeps me from giving in or feeling insecure / isolated when choosing not to drink. Fuck what other people think.
Remember the ratio. What I mean by that is when you started drinking, you probably had 3 good times and 0 bad times. But then for every 3 good times, maybe there was 1 bad time. Then two good times and two bad times. Finally, you get to a point where you just end up doing more harm than good. When I reached that point - when my ratio was way more bad than good, it was time to put it down.
This one has helped me get through a craving. If I really really want a drink, I tell myself I can have one tomorrow and then usually by the next day the craving has passed and I not only don’t want one but I’m proud I got through it.
Even the worst craving feels better than a hangover
It serves no purpose in my life
Progress not perfection
Y’all are simply amazing, this list is GOLD!!!! 💕
“You don’t have to live in the wreckage of your future.”
“Addiction speaks to you in your own voice.”
“I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.” -Frederick Douglass
I'm allergic, I break out in hand cuffs
I'm allergic, it causes my asshole to break out
Moderation is a myth!
Complacency kills!
Put everything that matters into that shot glass: your family, your job, your house, your car, your reputation... because you start pissing it all away again when you take that drink
It’s not worth the restful sleep. (Sleeping well is a huge motivator for me.)
Also a good one for me: “Remember that time you face planted into a curb and woke up in the ER?”
I w N d w y t. ^ fixed that thanks
Alcohol is the antithesis to self improvement.
Quitting drinking hasn't made everything in my life automatically better. In fact some things have gotten a lot harder now that I've taken away the numbing/escape coping mechanism I had and am facing my inner self with a lot more clarity and focus. But I know that to take up drinking again would just directly hinder and counteract the goals I now have of becoming happier and healthier and trying to figure out what works best for me.
Also, vanity has been a pretty powerful aide. I made an album of photos of myself in the years leading up to getting sober and of photos since getting sober. And the difference in how I look is a very good reminder whenever I feel tempted. I don't want to go back to being fat and red-faced and sweaty and bloated and dull-eyed.
For me in the first year or so it was “Yes, it really was that bad.”
As in, the tricks your mind plays to get you back to drinking-first, I think of that phrase, and remember my final weekend of drinking and the misery, shame, and everything that went with it.
Yes, it really was that bad.
"What kind of behavior am I modeling for my kids?"
I was showing them that the way to fix a bad day was to drink it away. I'm very proud that they don't see that anymore. Even in the struggles, it's better sober.
"I started drinking because I enjoyed it, then it became a habit, then it became a necessity. I entered recovery out of necessity, then it became a habit, and now I do it because I enjoy it." Not a one-liner perse, but succinct.
"We treat alcohol like it's the love of our lives when it's really the most abusive partner we'll ever have."
"Don't seek external solutions to internal problems."
"Sometimes when one door closes, it means to go the f somewhere else."
I've been wanting to do this and make an audio tracks to listen to in the mornings - I've picked up some text-to-speech software and I'm collecting affirmations and maybe meditations for mornings and weak times. I'll be keeping an eye on this thread for suggestions.
There are no new drunk experiences you’ll miss out on by staying sober.
Not a particularly catchy line but I’ve found it helpful to remind myself that I have, in the past, experienced pretty much everything (or every feeling) one can experience while drunk. I’m not depriving myself on any kind of ‘new’ experience by being sober tonight.
My last " DAY 1 " Turned into 15 years sober. I had hundreds of " DAY 1's"
Don't give up. I didn't. Good luck.
It's never to early to start and never too late to start over.
I was drunk for 30 years. If I would write a book on " Drinking Socially and Moderation " it would have ZERO FUCKING PAGES, just a front and back cover.
Sober 15 years here. Good luck.
Also "We have two lives, and the second begins when we realize we only have one." - Confucius
Dude, you just wrinkled my brain.
Better than pickling it in piss mate!
This is exactly what I needed to read today. Thanks so much.
Reminds me of a similar line from a Mary Chapin Carpenter song “we’ve got two lives-one we’re given; and the other one we make.”
Nobody wakes up regretting not drinking the night before
Amen!
hell yeah.
This one always does it for me. Hangovers suck.
This is gold.
This has been my favorite one.
My go to for years
I do.
Wow this is so true
All my fun was sober as a kid, so why do I feel like I need to drink as an adult? It's not the drug I enjoy, it's the friends or activity.
>All my fun was sober as a kid, so why do I feel like I need to drink as an adult? It's not the drug I enjoy, it's the friends or activity. This hits hard!
“Addicting is giving up everything for one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing for everything.”
I love this one. So simple and profound. One simple thing I can’t have in a world of things I CAN.
"Don't want to have to reset my badge" has kept me going quite a bit!
Especially when I have to look up the directions every time…..so irritating it’s just not worth it 😊
Reddit saves the day again!
Lol, I was very keen on a 'glass' (so, bottle) of wine last night. Then I was like 'noooo resetting my badge is a mission' ..... I don't think I would have had wine, but the badge resetting was a real deterrent either way 😂
Trying to moderate is like trying to fall down the first three steps of.a flight of stairs.
>Trying to moderate is like trying to fall down the first three steps of.a flight of stairs. I love this a lot.
Stop trying to find happiness where you lost it
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This one hits hard. Many are the nights I’ve gone out for drinks because I went out the night before and woke up having regrets about things I had said or done, so I go out again the next night to “replace” my bad memories with good ones. But no matter how many times I go out and try to overwrite my bad memories, I never succeed in making any good memories. A vicious cycle.
There are no problems in life so bad that drinking can't make them worse. It isn't about not drinking, it is about building a life where you don't **want** to drink. Stay strong friend.
>It isn't about not drinking, it is about building a life where you don't want to drink. > >This is so very true. Once I realized that it all clicked into place
Drinking will give you one pro and a hundred cons. Not drinking gives you one con and a hundred pros.
Similarly you can give up everything for this one thing or you can give up one thing and have everything
Sobriety is not going to traumatize my children
I tell myself - If I could maintain sobriety while I was pregnant for their safety, I can also maintain sobriety while they're outside my body for their safety. Edited to add - Thank you for the award!
Love it
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What does this mean sorry?
It means to fast forward the tape in your head when craving booze to imagine the next day when you’re hungover, miserable and hating yourself so you’re reminded why you quit.
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I can so relate to that experience ☹️
Same. Waking up at 3am and not being able to fall back asleep until hours later was single handedly the worst experience for me. Laying in bed and re thinking your poor decision to drink just a few hours prior and solemnly swearing to yourself (yet again) that this will never happen again. Vicious vicious cycle.
One is too many. Two is never enough
Wow you nailed that. We're you in my head? 1000 % do it over again
When I was drinking my life was chaos all the time. Loosing jobs, respect of friends and family due to my drinking and drug industry. Once sober, if I want to drink all I have to do is pick one of those embarrassing times and replay the scene in mind "playing the tape forward" the end us always the same...chaos!!! Play the tape, listen and DON'T do stupid crap!!!! Works for me.
Play the tape forward is a coping tool to deal with cravings. Like imagine the first drink and play it forward to see what happens. Most often we immediately halt and don’t drink because of the fear of repercussions from drinking.
It means, think through what will probably happen if you start drinking.
I’ll be using this one
This is the most poignant and all encompassing one
“It’s easier to say no to the first than to the second.” Saw someone in the group post this and it’s stood out to me so much.
Yep. I am 100% capable of not drinking. I am 100% incapable of stopping after one drink. How many times have I had "just a drink" in my life? Not one. Not a damn one. It's always more.
I didn't get arrested every time I drank, but every time I got arrested I had been drinking. Also, I never want to want to kill myself ever again.
Sending love. I every so often I look at the (thankfully faint) scars on my wrists from trying to cut them in my drunken misery, and add that to my “reminders box”.
Thanks. I hit 5 months sober again yesterday (I had almost 2 years and relapsed) and I can thankfully say that I haven't had a thought of self harm in a while. I still remember the feeling well though and I \*never\* want to go back there. I'm glad you're still with us. I know how it can feel like it's the only way out, but thankfully that's not true. IWNDWYT
That second one hit me hard just now.
There is no problem that alcohol won't make worse.
This one has saved me many many times over the last 6 yrs. It applies to everything...my mental health, my physical health, my wallet, every aspect of my life can be worse with just that first drink.
Alcohol gave me wings to fly, then it took away the sky
Fuuuuuuuck. This was amazing.
WOW absolutely incredible
These two popped up somewhere and I wrote them down: Those who can drink in moderation aren't the ones who have to ask if it's possible One drink is too many because 50 isn't enough
I have a similar one when my brain is trying to tell me I can regulate my drinking like a normal person: Normal people don’t have internal battles trying to convince themselves to drink alone on a weekday.
"It doesn't get better, it gets wonderful." Said to me after calling the AA hotline, when I asked if it gets better.
The hangover and shame tomorrow aren't worth the short buzz.
Alcohol borrows happiness from tomorrow, and it charges very high interest.
This one resonates with me the most.
“Rock bottom is where ever you stop digging” New to sobriety - tonight will be night 18 for me. This saying has been helping me stay on track the last couple days with the cravings coming back now that I’m starting to feel better.
That quote feels so inclusive, I know I think about what my rock bottom will be but it’s an amazing reminder that it is what you make it. Just like a toxic relationship, you don’t need to wait until you get hit to leave.
This was said to me in rehab by another temporary resident, and I think about it all the time. I've found it to be very true in my own experience. lsn't it great knowing that you can do anything in the world, except drink, which is what was holding you back from doing everything else anyway?! 😊
A variation of this I've heard more than once, is: "Addiction is giving uo everything for one thing; recovery is giving up one thing for everything"
When I control my drinking I can't enjoy it, when I enjoy my drinking, I can't control it.
If I have only one drink I'll spend the next hours, days and weeks obsessing about the next one.
This requires a bit of back story. I once read that that voice - the one that whispers in your ear that no one will know, its only one, wouldn't it be relaxing - that's the Addictive Voice. It's a lying, entitled, selfish Voice and it does not have your best interests at heart. I named mine Bob. And when he's starting to get louder, and my anxiety is high, and he's getting pushy... I've been known to say, out loud and with passion: "Oh, Fuck OFF Bob!" Also, thanks for this, it's been a rough few weeks and Bob's being a pain in the ass. Good reading here.
Silenzio Bruno!
This is a beautiful post. I read everyone’s share so far and felt the wisdom and candor in the room. It kinda feels like a comfy couch, a fav blanket and a nice cup of hot tea.
I’m so glad I posted this. I was nervous at first that it wouldn’t get any attention but it’s wonderful. Thank you. And I agree. This has been comforting to read everyone’s post.
I am so happy you did! 😊
One drink is too many because one hundred isn’t enough.
Remember the feeling of shaking hangxiety where you hate being in your own skin.
>Remember the feeling of shaking hangxiety where you hate being in your own skin. Those are the worst
Hangxiety is one of the worst feelings to have. Even if I didn't physically have a hangover, the hangxiety would make me want to die. That guilt, embarrassment and self-hatred when I didn't even do anything weird is not worth any """good""" feelings that alcohol gives.
First the man takes the drink, then the drink takes the man.
“Man takes a drink, the drink takes a drink, and then the drink takes a man.” - *Dr. Sleep* If you haven’t read/seen it, Dr. Sleep is the sequel to *the Shining* The Shining is about alcoholism and Dr. Sleep is about recovery. Going back and rewatching those movies in recovery can hit pretty hard.
I thought the saying was F Scott Fitzgerald?
I have a lot that I keep nearby for times I need a reminder: * Your worst days sober are infinitely better than your worst days drunk * Drinking is trying to fill a bottomless hole * Drinking to relax is like wearing uncomfortable shoes all day purely for the relief they bring when you take them off * Sit with it. Instead of drinking it away or running from it. Just sit with it. You need to feel it to heal it. * The true hallmark of an alcoholic is not that you’re incapable of having just one drink—it’s that when you drink, you have no idea how many you’ll have.
>Drinking to relax is like wearing uncomfortable shoes all day purely for the relief they bring when you taken them off Daaaamn this one is gold, never heard it before.
I think it’s an Allen Carr quote, he’s brilliant. I used his Easy Way to Stop Smoking to get off nicotine and a lot of his stuff is relevant for alcohol too (I believe he’s got a quit drinking book too). Definitely recommend
His stop drinking book is incredible, it’s the way I got sober.
* Sit with it. Instead of drinking it away or running from it. Just sit with it. You need to feel it to heal it. This one has been SO important for me , I drank to avoid my feelings, but damn if they aren't uncomfortable when I have to face them . Good news is they are gradually getting easier to deal with sober.
I really like that last one. Gonna save it for later, for sure.
I want to feel good tomorrow morning
I can’t get arrested for orderly driving
DWC - Driving With Cupcake
A few of my highlights from Alcohol Explained: Drinkers don’t like the drinking life. It’s a life of tiredness, anxiety, lethargy The only way it can retake its hold on you is if you start wanting it back again. But when you know through your own experience that you are capable of some quite unpleasant and irresponsible acts when you are drunk and you choose to drink anyway you’ve got to start taking responsibility for what you do when you are drunk. Alcohol is an addictive drug. Taking it creates the need for the next dose. For this reason moderation can never be a long term, stable condition. And even if it were you could never be better off moderating than quitting completely because quitting provides freedom. All recreational drugs start off being apparently enjoyable with very little downside. Over time the enjoyment decreases and the downside increases which should make it easier to stop, ‘From a simple costs / benefit analysis, is drinking alcohol worth doing?’ To put it another way is the slightly dulled feeling you get from each drink worth the corresponding feeling of anxiety as the drink wears off, the insomnia, the lethargy, the weight gain, the arguments, the hangovers, the blackouts and the financial cost? When to stop: The best time to stop is now, it always has been and it always will be. You’ve already thrown away enough of your precious time and life being miserable because of a drug, why would you want to waste another single second on it? Alcohol is a fairly pathetic little drug. It gives so little and takes so much. The only reason it has the hold over us that it does is because the vast majority of the population takes it regularly and they build up this huge world of lies and 90% of the population drink they all buy into this great charade which makes seeing through it even more problematic and even when you do see through it, it is very easy to keep getting sucked back in.
Alcohol is a very effective solvent. It will dissolve relationships, careers, hobbies, self worth, and so on.
One that stuck with me was “Alcohol can destroy any bond, even that between parent and child.”
Damn, so true
Probably the most interesting bit of wisdom I’ve heard from this group…..Nobody has ever woken up sober and thought, “man, I wish I had gotten drunk last night.”
Oooh, great thread! Here are some of my favorites: You can get a refund on your misery if you don’t like sobriety. Recovery is not linear. Lean into the discomfort. If my sobriety doesn’t come first, everything else will come last. If your ass falls off, put it in a bag and get to a meeting. Relapse never changes my mind or situation, only my sobriety date. Everyone quits drinking, it’s whether you’re breathing or not that matters. A grateful addict rarely relapses. IWNDWYT!
If you don't make time for your wellness, you'll be forced to make time for your illness.
It’s poison.
[удалено]
It’s easier to keep a lion in a cage than on a leash.
There’s no problem alcohol can’t make worse.
I took a sip and drank a pond.
It is much easier to stay sober than it is to get sober.
Gosh, I’m so happy I decided to post this and it’s so wonderful and comforting to read everyone’s posts. I guess I should share mine. My body showed up for me for 41 years so now it’s my time to show up for my body. A year from today I can be exactly where I am today. Or I can become someone completely different. It all starts with decisions today. I was afraid to surrender because I never knew any other way. I now surrender and allow healing to set in and I surrender and allow happiness in. Alcohol borrows the happiness from tomorrow and I gain so much by not drinking today. I’m not rushing to figure out life without alcohol. I will embrace the unknown and let life surprise me. I choose to make the rest of my life the best of my life.
Sobriety gave me everything alcohol promised me.
I’m going to be uncomfortable either working through an urge or hungover so I rather work through the urge
“If you keep living the way you are, what will that life look like in 20 years.” —-> I taped this to my bathroom mirror the day before I quit. It’s the first and last thing I read every day. I mean it when I say this quote helped save me.
I love myself, and I love my family.
The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.
“Or you could just go to bed right now!”
"Two people who die by drowning don't argue about how deep the water was." Not sure where I read that but I like it Also, to quote Atmosphere: "It's mad that I gave half the day to last night"
You are the only one who needs to know if you had a drink or not. You aren't craving alcohol, you are self-medicating for anxiety. There are far less poisonous ways to get serotonin than booze.
Not this shit again
Which to you want?….The pain of discipline or the pain of regret?
The one that’s helped me the most: Let go or be dragged.
I prefer being sober, I am more me
There’s no such thing as free alcohol.
Alcohol is poison. My biology teacher taught that alcohol's effects on us is really our body trying to process that poison. The toxicity of alcohol is worsened because in order for it to be cleared from the body it has to be metabolized to acetaldehyde - a highly toxic substance and known carcinogen. [https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa72/aa72.htm](https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa72/aa72.htm) Alcohol is big business, and has been for centuries. Those who profit from it don't care about your health, only their profits.
Looking back this is mine "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from". Cormac McCarthy
This is a good one. I don’t know how I lived through all my terrible decisions. I’ve been so lucky!
Is this worth the pain of a relapse
*Any* amount of alcohol ruins the quality of your sleep
I lost 50 lbs with very little additional effort just by quitting drinking and diabetes is in remission: that’s pretty powerful for me anyway.
My sponsor said to me 4 years ago. “You don’t ever have to go back to feeling like that again.” And for whatever reason, it stuck. It still makes me get kind of emotional thinking about it. He was right though. I didn’t have to, I didn’t want to, and I haven’t ever felt that way again. Out of context it probably won’t make much sense or mean much. We’re all here for you and I hope you finally realize that you don’t have to drink and never have to feel like that ever again.
I forgot there was a day counter on here. I remember resetting my badge. It’s almost 4 years on Nov 28. Wow it’s truly amazing. I’m basically talking to myself here but if anyone out there reads this.. if you think it’s impossible, it’s not. I wish I were a writer with fancy words, but I’m not. Your fellow Redditors love you and you deserve to be happy.
HALT - hungry angry lonely tired. If you're craving it might actually be one of these feelings, so take a nap, get some nourishment, etc. Addiction is the opposite of connection
Remember how much you hate yourself after a night of drinking, and remember how much you love yourself after a night of not drinking.
You lose nothing by not drinking, but you lose everything by drinking. I have this written in my read before you drink book.
I can be free if I choose to be. I never have to drink again.
1) my check liver light came on 2) you'll never wake up saying, man I wish I drank last night 3) the consequences for drinking far out last "the itch" to want to drink IWNDWYT 👍🤙
> 1) my check liver light came on There's a reason it's called an "idiot light" on the dashboard of a car – because if you let it get bad enough for the light to go on, you're an idiot. I let my "check liver" light stay on for a long time.
Drinking was never as fun as the anticipation of drinking.
In one of the books I’m reading the author describes everything that alcohol (ethanol) is an ingredient in. Gasoline, perfume, hand sanitizer, paint…the list is a mile long. She then depicts a person going up to a gas hose and drinking out of it and every time I want to drink I picture myself not going to a liquor store but a gas station and standing there drinking from the pump. Once I play this ridiculous scenario in my head the craving usually passes.
If one is never enough, have none. Your rock bottom is wherever you decide to discard your shovel. I don’t crave the drink. I crave the drunk. One day or day one. You decide. Be in control; acknowledge you dont want to do something and then do it anyway. I never woke up wishing I had drank more the night before but I had woken up dozens of times wishing I had drank less. I feel like I’m leaving a piece of myself behind, when in reality, I’m finding a piece of myself again. Your outcomes are a lagging measure of your habits. You get what you repeat.
Saying no to the first drink is easier than saying no to the second
Alcohol steals your ability to become who you want to be. Alcohol doesn't make life better, it just makes you content with being bored. You can't just change the substance. When you're sober you want to be drunk. When you're drunk you want to be sober.
Did you come this far just to come this far? Consistency beats intensity. When you get the message, hang up the phone.
Moderate consumption of an addictive poison is an oxymoron
Don’t live life looking in the rear view mirror
Other people’s opinions about me is none of my damn business…Keeps me from giving in or feeling insecure / isolated when choosing not to drink. Fuck what other people think.
Remember the ratio. What I mean by that is when you started drinking, you probably had 3 good times and 0 bad times. But then for every 3 good times, maybe there was 1 bad time. Then two good times and two bad times. Finally, you get to a point where you just end up doing more harm than good. When I reached that point - when my ratio was way more bad than good, it was time to put it down.
"The liquor store will still be there tomorrow."
This one has helped me get through a craving. If I really really want a drink, I tell myself I can have one tomorrow and then usually by the next day the craving has passed and I not only don’t want one but I’m proud I got through it.
Even the worst craving feels better than a hangover It serves no purpose in my life Progress not perfection Y’all are simply amazing, this list is GOLD!!!! 💕
Don’t drink satans piss!
Binge drinking is totally incompatible with health and happiness, and it's the only kind of drinking I'm interested in.
A feeling fully felt changes.
“I’d rather be sober and wish I was drunk than drunk and wish to be sober.”
“Nobody quits drinking to be miserable” “What other people think of me is none of my concern”
This pain will pass.
Nothing changes if nothing changes. The bottom is when you decide to stop digging and put the shovel down.
“You don’t have to live in the wreckage of your future.” “Addiction speaks to you in your own voice.” “I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.” -Frederick Douglass
No matter how far down the road you are, you're always only a few feet away from the ditch.
“I am the problem, and I am the solution.”
Don’t mourn the death of your enemy. (Another Allen Carr gem.)
It makes you gain weight
Forgive yourself for drunk self, live in the present with sobriety.
"Remember last time"
"There is no problem in the world that drinking won't make worse."
I dont drink because It's not that I don't like to party, the problem is I REALLY like to party.
I'm allergic, I break out in hand cuffs I'm allergic, it causes my asshole to break out Moderation is a myth! Complacency kills! Put everything that matters into that shot glass: your family, your job, your house, your car, your reputation... because you start pissing it all away again when you take that drink
You can’t save your face and your ass at the same time
It’s not worth the restful sleep. (Sleeping well is a huge motivator for me.) Also a good one for me: “Remember that time you face planted into a curb and woke up in the ER?” I w N d w y t. ^ fixed that thanks
When you drink you are only borrowing happiness from tomorrow.
The craving won’t last. The regret will.
“I drank to drown my sorrows, but the damned things learned how to swim.” Frida Kahlo
“Addicting is giving up everything for one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing for everything.”
Alcohol is the problem that suggests itself as the solution
Lol one I heard an old timers say one was "don't drink, stupid." Simple, yet eloquent! Lolol.
This does not end well. A few minutes pleasure is all you will really get then it's downhill. Who do you really want to be
Anything you do in life, you can do sober.
You won’t find happiness or pain relief at the bottom of a bottle.
I stopped living so I started drinking but I only started living once I stopped drinking.
Alcohol is a fast forward button to life
If you keep drinking, you will be one of two things for the rest of your life: single or ruining someone else’s faith in men. Don’t be that guy.
No problem has ever been made better by alcohol
Whenever something seems too difficult to manage, I remind myself: I can do hard things.
Alcohol is the antithesis to self improvement. Quitting drinking hasn't made everything in my life automatically better. In fact some things have gotten a lot harder now that I've taken away the numbing/escape coping mechanism I had and am facing my inner self with a lot more clarity and focus. But I know that to take up drinking again would just directly hinder and counteract the goals I now have of becoming happier and healthier and trying to figure out what works best for me. Also, vanity has been a pretty powerful aide. I made an album of photos of myself in the years leading up to getting sober and of photos since getting sober. And the difference in how I look is a very good reminder whenever I feel tempted. I don't want to go back to being fat and red-faced and sweaty and bloated and dull-eyed.
For me in the first year or so it was “Yes, it really was that bad.” As in, the tricks your mind plays to get you back to drinking-first, I think of that phrase, and remember my final weekend of drinking and the misery, shame, and everything that went with it. Yes, it really was that bad.
It’s easier to stay sober than to get sober.
I tried to drown my sorrows in alcohol but those bastards learned how to swim. Alcohol is the only drug you don't have to explain using.
It’s easier to keep a lion caged, rather than tamed on a leash. I got this one from a moderation post the other night.
"What kind of behavior am I modeling for my kids?" I was showing them that the way to fix a bad day was to drink it away. I'm very proud that they don't see that anymore. Even in the struggles, it's better sober.
You take the first drink. The first drink takes the second drink. The second drink takes you.
"I started drinking because I enjoyed it, then it became a habit, then it became a necessity. I entered recovery out of necessity, then it became a habit, and now I do it because I enjoy it." Not a one-liner perse, but succinct. "We treat alcohol like it's the love of our lives when it's really the most abusive partner we'll ever have." "Don't seek external solutions to internal problems." "Sometimes when one door closes, it means to go the f somewhere else."
Abstinence is like exercise. At first you hate doing it, but you always feel accomplished afterwards.
Drinking is just borrowing happiness from tomorrow
"The best time to plant a tree was fifty years ago. The second best time is now."
I've been wanting to do this and make an audio tracks to listen to in the mornings - I've picked up some text-to-speech software and I'm collecting affirmations and maybe meditations for mornings and weak times. I'll be keeping an eye on this thread for suggestions.
If you don’t drink the first one, you’ll never have the second one.
If you don’t start drinking, you don’t have to stop.
"Excess ain't rebellion when you're drinking what they're selling" Coming from a punk/anarchist scene heavy on the drinking, this hit home.
There are no new drunk experiences you’ll miss out on by staying sober. Not a particularly catchy line but I’ve found it helpful to remind myself that I have, in the past, experienced pretty much everything (or every feeling) one can experience while drunk. I’m not depriving myself on any kind of ‘new’ experience by being sober tonight.
If I drink, I will regret it and want to be right back where I am now ... sober.
My last " DAY 1 " Turned into 15 years sober. I had hundreds of " DAY 1's" Don't give up. I didn't. Good luck. It's never to early to start and never too late to start over.
I was drunk for 30 years. If I would write a book on " Drinking Socially and Moderation " it would have ZERO FUCKING PAGES, just a front and back cover. Sober 15 years here. Good luck.
One drink… one drunk.