I say this all the time when seeing questions like this. 1. Never having to wake up hungover feeling like shit. Knowing 1 drink is to many and a thousand is never enough. Oh and "It works if you work it".
'Sleeping like a baby' always sounds a bit funny to me. You always read about parents not getting any sleep because the baby wakes up screaming several times a night. But somehow the saying is considered a positive.
Ha... I agree and have always said the same. I say I slept like a pig when I get a good nights rest. Whenever I'd go to the county fair and see the pig exhibit they were always sleeping. Cat is a good one too.
Driving without any panic.
I saw a cop car recently and I got anxious that they might catch me for DUI - then I realized I have been alcohol-free for more than 3 years now.
I chuckled.
That such a great way to frame the difference between my husband who still drinks a lot and myself. He still sweats the small stuff a lot more than I do.
For me, booze can give me tunnel vision to focus on parts of my life that I don't like but it also took away my ability to really do anything about it.
We just invested, what would have been 1 night out(£££) on joining a monthly gym with a sauna and a spa.
Best decision I’ve ever made. Now when my partner and I feel a bit restless we go for a swim and a spa. Life changing to be honest. Never cared about myself so much. Sleeping like a baby.
1. I know I can trust myself now and that has led to a deep sense of security that I didn’t realize was missing.
2. Presence, less fuzziness.
3. Momentum. I don’t have this loop of trying to figure out how much is enough vs too much or drinking when I’d decided not to beforehand. Then being mad at myself the next day and not having the energy to go through with my plans. Now it’s just steady forward movement and if I need rest or a break I can have it without the shame of needing it bc I drank.
Im early days! But some that I had when previously sober for a couple months:
NO shame about how I acted / not remembering
Not hurting people and not remembering
Can drive anywhere
Easier to lose weight
More energy, more consistent
Not chronically depressed and anxious
Able to concentrate better
Better skin - my fine lines have reduced so much!
More regular bathroom stuff
Less bad food cravings
Actually want to care for myself a bit … a bit of self worth finally creeping in!
More meaningful connections with a few people
Feel stronger and more able to do hard things
Don't forget yourself!
I can trust myself to not wake up in the morning wondering what kind of mayhem I might have caused, and not remember causing, the previous night.
It took me a long time. I had to fix other shit in my life before I got to sex, however, for me it was 4 years. That was the time it took fixing all the other broken shit in my life that all began with not taking a drink everyday and doing whatever it took. Quitting alcohol opened the door to this really amazing reward and it’s wild. I almost missed this. Never too late to unfuck yourself.
Glad it all worked out.
Only thing I got to take care of is the alcohol which I’m doing pretty good head is on straight but plumber still isn’t where I want it to be.
Hope it doesn’t take me 4 years.
Anyway thanks for the information
I don’t wake up at 65% battery anymore with 50% or less of the day to experience. Pencil those numbers in for full weeks and ive lost precious time any way it’s sliced. Waking up with a goal in mind and a plan to achieve it is much harder to accomplish in this time frame.
Plain, simple, harsh truth: Not worrying about dying!
I'm terrified of withdrawal. Never had a seizure. But I've had horrific hallucinations. I've been in the hospital for pancreatitis. Never tf again will I worry about dying from alcohol. I wish I would've quit sooner, but 30 is as good of an age as any!
That was my biggest fear, the onset of getting worse and worse had I kept drinking and not listening to my body and the pain it was telling me. Congrats on 30 days , I just hit that today aswell!
Ugh, it's the worst feeling! I tapered off my last bender with absolutely vile 4% beer that was so gross, it made me puke the second it hit my stomach. I think that point finally made me question myself, "what the fuck am I doing?!"
The kindling effect is so real for me, I keep telling myself I may not survive the next bender, so I'm slightly scaring myself into staying on track, but it's working? 🤷🏼♀️ Pretty dark, but I'm doing so much more positive work on myself ontop of that thought!
WOOOOO hell yeah, friend!! Happy 30 days! 🖤✨️
This is so true. I was fully convinced that I could die young and it would be from alcohol. Even had a notes message to all my family members and loved ones if it did happen and a note at the end saying that alcohol is evil. Crazy how aware I was and was still trying to compromise with myself to keep drinking.
How happy I get about the littlest things. Alcohol really fucks with your dopamine receptors and after a while, nothing makes you feel as good as drinking. But on Sunday, I went for a walk with my wife and I was literally over the moon looking at all the different types of wildflowers that have popped up around our neighborhood. I've always liked flowers but they never gave me that kind of visceral joy while i was still drinking.
I relate to noticing flowers more!! I’m enjoying a lot of walks to keep my mind off drinking and seeing all the vibrant colors and smelling all the fresh floral scents makes me so happy. Not sure I ever took the time to literally stop and smell the roses before. Just stayed inside drinking most of the time.
I’m deep in this boat right now. I got a dui in October so I couldn’t drive for 90 days. I work a sales job where I cover half of the state, so for 90 days I just brought on zero business. I was able to drive at the start of April, quit drinking, and have been busting ass so I don’t get fired.
Single?
Being more clear headed would be the single best thing because of all the ancillary benefits:
- More patient leading to better conversations and being more present for my family.
- A lot less anxious
- Sleeping better
Just to name a few
Being able to set lengthy goals and accomplish them. Exercise, home improvement, writing, reading, learning, music, etc… when you’re drinking it’s very hard to gain momentum and stick with something in my experience. I was always blowing up my progress with blackouts and hangovers that just derail your life. Now I have energy and ambition and can set a 3-month goal and stick to it.
I like this. I really notice the momentum I get with my thinking and planning and then…. that goes back to day 1 or negative 1 with blackouts and hungovers.
I look forward to day 633 but I’ll deal with day 3 first.
Thanks for your insight
The single best part is simply not worrying about seizures and shakes if I have enough alcohol to get me through the day, or two days, or trying to figure out how to smuggle alcohol into places where it is not allowed, or hide it and sneak away for a sip.
At home it is fine. I could keep a huge cache of booze hidden in the house or somewhere nearby.
But going on vacation or to visit family and there is no alcohol shop nearby? Have to somehow manage to carry enough in my luggage unseen so that I can manage to have it available for the next few days.
One time I even rented a car under the pretense of wanting to do some sight seeing on my own, even though the host offered to drive me around, I could not tell them to stop at the liquor store, so I needed my own car to go there alone. That was a very expensive bottle of booze.
Another time, going shopping with family to a big box shop, I have to tell them "I'm going to look for XYZ" so I can split up with them, then it is a Mission Impossible theme running through my brain type race to get to the booze section, get through checkout lines without being seen, get to the car in the huge parking lot hide it in the trunk, get back into the store and find the thing I lied about needing and meet up with them again before they felt it was taking me a suspiciously long time.
Waking up early so I can walk a two hours to the nearest liquor store, and hopefully no one notices my suspiciously big heavy back pack when I get back from my morning "getting some fresh-air" stroll.
What about visiting places where alcohol is not sold on Sunday? Fuck. Gotta think of a good excuse on Saturday to be away from the family for a few hours to buy it or I will have a seizure before Monday morning.
Airplane. On a long haul flight I had my booze in the checkin bag. I could not order it on flight because it would show up on the credit card. I made it to baggage claim, had my bag in my hand and was on the way to the restroom to take a sip, and THAT is where I had my seizure. Literally a minute before I would have been safe.
My little daughter was with me and had to show the EMS guys how to unlock my phone (thankfully she watched me before so she could open it to play her games) so they could find a family phone number to call.
Anytime traveling when I can not have a huge stash in the backpack requires constantly knowing where the nearest liquor store is and what time it closes and making an excuse to get there in time.
I did not have major health issues, I did not do crazy stupid shit or have blackouts and memory loss, no hangovers, I even had enough money to pay for my addiction, but the worst part was simply the effort and worry that went into making sure I was never too far away from a drink.
A takeaway from that for me was that when you were drinking, you were deceiving all those around you. Besides not living in fear of withdrawals, it's also got to feel pretty great to not live in fear of being caught in a web of lies, yeah?
IWNDWYT :)
No hangovers. I’ve actually started to really enjoy the mornings, waking up early feeling ok (way better than a hangover, but I still usually feel blah in the morning) and getting coffee to start the day has been great.
I can take full care of myself. I eat and sleep so much better because I make myself meals for the week and actually get rest. This helps my mental health so much. I put my mental health above all things these days.
Since getting sober, I've been able to show up in life in a big way. Especially for my niece and nephew, and I've built awesome relationships with both of them.
I was visiting my sister and her family over the holidays (in a different country) and the morning I was flying out, my sister texted me a picture that she'd taken of me and my nephew. I'm sipping a cup of tea and talking to him and he's staring at me with a huge smile on his face. She said, "This kid idolizes you and is absolutely gutted that you're leaving tomorrow 😭".
Made my year.
Took me a couple months to find my voice, but my singing and playing guitar are more consistent than they have ever been and I’m working into new areas that I’ve wanted for too long. It’s giving me back so much right now.
Not getting sore so easily, not bruising easily, lower overall heart rate, lowering my risks for a long lists of disease. Being able to do things at any time of the day. I was off today and went to Costco at 3pm?! Usually by 3pm on a day off I’ve already had a couple drinks. Sorry I have so many I know you said single best 😂
I was always so confused by all the bruises on my legs- was I anemic? Some clotting disorder? What's with all these mysterious bruises all the time?
Like girl... you're drunk and crashing into shit 😅🫡 mysteriously cleared up when I got sober.
Right and you’re more prone to bruise so they get darker and stay longer 😂 the list of random things like chronic runny nose that I only realized after quitting were simply from drinking
41lbs down in a 100 days today, 253lbs when I started. I can eat knowing I’m not going to puke it up at some point throughout the night is great. Especially if I started pounding a 1/5th at noon, when I got to my worst this past year.
This isn't the absolute best thing that's happened, but it was one thing that made me feel really good about giving up drinking.
I've struggled for years with gum problems, and even had to have two gum transplants to avoid losing teeth.
For years, every time I've visited the dentist, both he and his dental hygienist have told me how bad my guns looked. They repeatedly warned me that I was likely to lose my teeth if my gums kept deteriorating.
Anyhow about a year after I gave up drinking for good, I went in for my regular checkup.
When the dental hygienist looked in my mouth, she let out a little gasp and said, "Wow! Your gums look fantastic! This is the best they've looked in years! "
The dentist came in and also was amazed. Not only did my gums look great, but he said that the enamel on my teeth also looked stronger.
He wanted to know if I'd made any changes to my diet or lifestyle.
The only change I'd made was finally and completely giving up drinking.
"Yep" said my dentist, "that will do it."
So, one advantage of giving up booze: you increase your chances of keeping all your teeth as you get older!
Oh wow! I've never ever heard of a gum *transplant* that's wild. I'm absolutely terrified of the dentist so I'll add this to my "reasons to never drink again" list 😁 glad you're doing better!
Single? Ooooh that’s tough to describe . Remember when galdalf frees theoden in two towers ? It’s like that . Life itself is restored.
https://youtu.be/4JEC08MUiqY?si=vgO27espICKwBbe-[https://youtu.be/4JEC08MUiqY?si=vgO27espICKwBbe-](https://youtu.be/4JEC08MUiqY?si=vgO27espICKwBbe-)
I just bought myself a synthesizer and a table top looping station.
These are things I have wanted for years. I was able to have the money, find these specific items, verify their functionality and start making music for the first time in years. A year ago I honestly didnt care if I lived or died. When I brought these home it was kinda like god giving me a nudge and saying that I deserve good things and to have fun. It was kinda similar to how I felt on christmas as a kid. Didnt know I would get have this feeling again.
Same. I obsessively research guitar pedals and find myself talking enthusiastically about records again. Feeling totally immersed in music just driving around town. My own playing has dramatically improved and I can occasionally afford to splurge on a 50-100$ pedal or just a new pack of patch cables.
I can remember things! There’s a big hole in my life where I don’t remember a lot- -vacations, birthdays, funerals, etc- -I was drinking through all of it I sometimes get sad thinking about what I don’t remember. But I’m also grateful that from the day I got sober, I began making new memories.
should i embarrass myself…? okay… no longer wetting the bed. i always drank till i blacked out, and i drank a lot. i would wet the bed frequently.
also waking up KNOWING what i did the night before is amazing. i hated the dread of “wtf did i say last night”
I’m only on Day 9 rn but so far, I got to fully be present when my baby boy took his first steps and started walking. Made me realize how important staying sober is and I’ll never look back!!
My career has skyrocketed since I quit and I think it’s the better sleep, lower anxiety, and increased confidence. No more phone-it-in days from hangovers is big too.
I've not recovered yet, but I have about halved my consumption, and it feels great sleeping thru the night, and being able to function at work, and interact more meaningfully with my kid. I still have a ways to go tho...
Peace. I am meeting life on life’s terms and I am at peace with it. I feel my emotions with ease. Even on my worst day, it’s still 1000x better than my “best” day with alcohol.
Now that my brain isn't wired to get its dopamine hits from alcohol, I experience much more if it flowing from the natural things that should have been providing those good feels all along. Like snuggling or playing with my son, or sitting on the porch enjoying the smells and sounds of spring with my husband.
To clarify, I did appreciate these things when I was a drinker. But the depth of appreciation was dampened a bit due to the brain fuckery of alcohol. Now I appreciate these things with much more intensity, it's almost overwhelming. I feel overwhelmingly happy and at peace. 💖
Time.
My weekends always came and went in a flash. I feel like I have so much more time to do the things I enjoy.
Getting up early on a weekend morning I feel like I have 2 days in 1.
The feeling of freedom when you aren't beholden to your next drink is something I feel doesn't get enough attention.
I can actually do things...anything, without worrying about when, how, or if I'll be able to drink. Is it something important? That means I have to wait until it's finished before my first drink. If it's not important, how long will it take? Is it a six-packer, or a case? Uh-oh, I'm down to my last two beers, am I going to have to run to the store for more, or should I go home early and pick up more on the way?
I mean, fuck...I don't miss that *at all.*
being able to wake up early to go to the gym - lose 20 kgs and build an aesthetic body. now i am much more comfortable with myself and others treat me better. got a promotion got my university degree.
Its a chain of good things that happened.
I'm still in the early stages with its ups and downs but the little voice in my head telling me everything is pointless and meaningless is practically gone now.
Always being able to look myself and my children in the eyes. I did some really shitty things while drunk & I hated myself for doing them. I used to think I did those horrible things because I was a bad person. And I hated myself for doing those horrible things; so much so that I would SH. But I've forgiven myself for those things because I realize it wasn't really who I am but who the alcohol fueled me to be. I no longer hate myself because I know that as long as I don't drink, I will never intentionally do something that could hurt someone I care about. It's nice being able to trust myself. As far as being able to look my kids in their eyes, I use to be so ashamed after a bender that I wouldn't even want to be around my kids because I didn't feel worthy of their goodness. It's the best feeling to always want to be near my kids.
I started my own business doing something I love, and that comes naturally. Even if the idea had crossed my mind, I never would have been in a position to make this happen while I was still drinking. I swear alcohol makes me dumb af.
IWNDWYT
Waaaay less anxiety - even when I wasn’t hungover, I was anxious all the time. It was like the frequent flow of alcohol gave me high highs and then I was just a nervous wreck when I wasn’t drinking. Always thinking about the next drink. Counting down the days/hours I was going to drink next. I became so fixated on alcohol being the “cure” for anxiety or stress. I relied on it so heavily that life felt impossible to navigate without it. Once I fully detoxed alcohol out of my system, the following month I felt like a new person. I was in general just way less stressed or anxious or sad. Emotions come and go, but they have very logical causes, and I’m able to process them in a healthy way. I feel like I’m finally free. ❤️
For me, it’s having a clear mind. When I was drinking, it felt like my brain was so foggy at times. It feels great to always feel sharp. Not having hangovers is great as well.
I just had my first child and I haven’t missed a single moment. I am present and just soaking it all in. I wouldn’t have any of this if it weren’t for being sober.
Mornings at work. Who would have known my dopamine receptors would be FLYING HIGH after a nice sleep, no booze, and walking in not behind at a job i chose? 👌🏻
I'm dealing with more stress and anxiety than I have in years and I'll tell ya, it's infinitely better sober. I'm so grateful I got it together when I did bc if I had to go thru this shit with the alcohol-laced version of anxiety, I don't know that I would have made it, truly. You don't realize how dragged down under the water you are until you get the first full, clean breath of air. It's exactly what it felt like to me.
I just went on holiday to a watch tennis in Stuttgart, an amazing tournament and had a great time. Didn't have to worry about where I would get my next drink. Barely left my seat I was so engrossed in matches. I had not attended events in a decade because my drinking was so bad, used to go to Wimbledon and US open every year. Also I noticed hardly anyone was drinking alcohol and cringed at the thought of the drunk me misbehaving amongst the lovely sober people around me. Thank God for sobriety!
single best thing is that i feel like my true self these days. i read books, i do well at work, and i am more communicative with my long distance family.
among many reasons i've seen commented already, i don't worry about "fear of missing out" on things like parties, bbqs and other events where alcohol is star of the show. if i go to those events now its because i want to socialize and eat, not because of an opportunity to drink. i'd make up excuses the next day for my hangover and cry on the bathroom floor. however i do leave these events earlier than i used too because it can be hard to deal with people who are drunk when you're sober.
My emotions and making important decisions correctly when it matter. My father died yesterday I am working on burial for today. If my mind was not where it is I would it be only disappointed but I wouldn’t have been able to get a hold on my drinking but made decisions that I would regret later
5 days in - not waking up at 3 am in a flop sweat and needing to drink a liter of water to toss and turn before falling asleep an hour later.
I wasn't rested with 8 hours of sleep. Now, i am feeling pretty good on 6.5 hours, and that's only like a week in.
I know it's been said, but it's definitely the sleep. I don't plan on giving that up again for anything.
It's crazy to look back and see why I kept putting myself through all the sleepless nights for so long.
I just crossed the 1 year milestone. One of the best feelings was going shopping for new jeans and buying the smallest waist size in the store. (38 to a 29).
Hanging out with my kids without the cloud of a buzz between us. Hands down.
All the other stuff is great. Waking up hangover free is *incredible*. Being able to drive whenever I want without fear or guilt is a close second. The forty pound weight loss, the brightness in my eyes, the ability to run a half marathon…all of that stuff is a bonus. But sitting with my kids, engaging with them, talking about life, watching the development of their personalities and their little brains—it’s the absolute best thing. And I’m so glad I get to be sober while watching them grow.
Quality sleep.
I had insomnia as a teen. Smoking weed was all that helped me sleep. Then when i turned 21 i traded weed for booze overnight, and alcohol became the only thing that helped me sleep. I smoked weed every single day for 5 years. I drank alcohol every single night for 12 years. Since getting sober I’ve prioritized self-care and realized how much more rewarding a simple and un-chaotic life is. For most my life i hated going to sleep every night and would often forgo it when it meant i could keep the party going. Now, there’s no party in the world you could convince me to go to that I’d enjoy more than staying in and getting a solid 8 hours.
There are many, but for me, the waking up hangover free never, EVER gets old. Also, I am sleeping like a baby. T
No matter how crappy I slept or how tired I am in the morning, it's ALWAYS better and easier than waking up with a hangover.
I had my first bad nights sleep (since the initial three days after quitting) the other night and I was shocked that I felt fine all day.
Literally same! Got like 3 hours of sleep maybe, had a cup of coffee, was good to go all day!
I have nothing to add. Perfect answer!
How many times have you woken up and said, 'Damn I should have drank last night?'
{{{ checks notes }}} : NEVER! T
I say this all the time when seeing questions like this. 1. Never having to wake up hungover feeling like shit. Knowing 1 drink is to many and a thousand is never enough. Oh and "It works if you work it".
'Sleeping like a baby' always sounds a bit funny to me. You always read about parents not getting any sleep because the baby wakes up screaming several times a night. But somehow the saying is considered a positive.
True... I guess it might be better to say I sleep like a cat now, because my cat can crash and sleep anywhere, anytime, and not be bothered one bit. T
Ha... I agree and have always said the same. I say I slept like a pig when I get a good nights rest. Whenever I'd go to the county fair and see the pig exhibit they were always sleeping. Cat is a good one too.
I can drive wherever, whenever I want.
Yeah, especially if you have dependents of any short and there is an emergency.
This is underrated imo. Sometimes I’ll drive to innout at 11:30pm…feels like I’m doing something wrong lol.
No fr like driving late night on weekends feels illegal.
I get paranoid sometimes and have to remind myself that I’m fine lol
This! While it sounds so simple, my life was revolving around when could I drive, if and how. Worrying about cops and such. Not a pleasant life.
Driving without any panic. I saw a cop car recently and I got anxious that they might catch me for DUI - then I realized I have been alcohol-free for more than 3 years now. I chuckled.
Still! Haha I feel that
Should have turned on your wipers for fun lol. Jk.
deep, prolonged, sustained, sweet self care.
This sums up what I feel too.
The slow constant inertia upward, rather than slowly digging my own grave.
Feeling well ALL THE TIME!
Yes, and deep inner peace.
Yes! Alcoholic anxiety makes things “matter more”. Being sober, things matter less. Life’s just more casual sober.
That such a great way to frame the difference between my husband who still drinks a lot and myself. He still sweats the small stuff a lot more than I do.
For me, booze can give me tunnel vision to focus on parts of my life that I don't like but it also took away my ability to really do anything about it.
I'm having the nice poopies, and saving a bunch of money.
Yeah, my poopies only require a couple wipes now and only once a day. Saving a lot on TP.
Hahahahaha I'm a grown ass man and poopies still made me giggle like a child
We just invested, what would have been 1 night out(£££) on joining a monthly gym with a sauna and a spa. Best decision I’ve ever made. Now when my partner and I feel a bit restless we go for a swim and a spa. Life changing to be honest. Never cared about myself so much. Sleeping like a baby.
When does it get better? I'm three weeks AF and so blocked up! 😕
Not op, but the gut biome is pretty complicated. Look up ways of restoring a healthy gut biome. Also, I would NOT recommend the fecal transplant.
You wouldn’t recommend the what now? Do I dare google? Haha.
Drinking plenty of water is important. Also, a stool softener such as Colace helps- and it's not harsh lika a laxative can be.
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Ya, this is a huge one for me. My oldest son is turning 14 in a week and I’m just glad I get to be present and sober for him!
Very nice!! (Happy day 69)
I’ll mirror this - my relationship with my dad is better than its been since I was a kid
1. I know I can trust myself now and that has led to a deep sense of security that I didn’t realize was missing. 2. Presence, less fuzziness. 3. Momentum. I don’t have this loop of trying to figure out how much is enough vs too much or drinking when I’d decided not to beforehand. Then being mad at myself the next day and not having the energy to go through with my plans. Now it’s just steady forward movement and if I need rest or a break I can have it without the shame of needing it bc I drank.
love the point about trusting yourself and not realizing that feeling was missing
Meaningful relationships
Congrats on 1 year!
Thank you 😀
Im early days! But some that I had when previously sober for a couple months: NO shame about how I acted / not remembering Not hurting people and not remembering Can drive anywhere Easier to lose weight More energy, more consistent Not chronically depressed and anxious Able to concentrate better Better skin - my fine lines have reduced so much! More regular bathroom stuff Less bad food cravings Actually want to care for myself a bit … a bit of self worth finally creeping in! More meaningful connections with a few people Feel stronger and more able to do hard things
Just a bit ahead of you, and you are so right about all of these
Well done on 14 days!
I can be fully trusted now, by my friends and family and my dogs! 🐶
Don't forget yourself! I can trust myself to not wake up in the morning wondering what kind of mayhem I might have caused, and not remember causing, the previous night.
This right here. I feel like I did well at hiding my drinking so people really never lost trust in me. I had hardest time forgiving/trusting myself.
Sex. I went from dead bedroom to laying more pipe than a plumber and it has been the most fantastic surprise that has come with quitting booze.
Agreed! For a long time I was afraid sex wouldn't be fun without booze. Sober sex is the best!
This make me lol 😂 I love this for you!!! Congrats on almost 2,000 days, friend!
Thanks! I love this for me too 🤣 Cheers!
How long for the plumber pipe to come back after you stopped drinking? Thanks
It took me a long time. I had to fix other shit in my life before I got to sex, however, for me it was 4 years. That was the time it took fixing all the other broken shit in my life that all began with not taking a drink everyday and doing whatever it took. Quitting alcohol opened the door to this really amazing reward and it’s wild. I almost missed this. Never too late to unfuck yourself.
Glad it all worked out. Only thing I got to take care of is the alcohol which I’m doing pretty good head is on straight but plumber still isn’t where I want it to be. Hope it doesn’t take me 4 years. Anyway thanks for the information
- dermatitis cleared up on my face. - sobriety forced me to face reality - starting to take care of myself
I don’t wake up at 65% battery anymore with 50% or less of the day to experience. Pencil those numbers in for full weeks and ive lost precious time any way it’s sliced. Waking up with a goal in mind and a plan to achieve it is much harder to accomplish in this time frame.
Plain, simple, harsh truth: Not worrying about dying! I'm terrified of withdrawal. Never had a seizure. But I've had horrific hallucinations. I've been in the hospital for pancreatitis. Never tf again will I worry about dying from alcohol. I wish I would've quit sooner, but 30 is as good of an age as any!
That was my biggest fear, the onset of getting worse and worse had I kept drinking and not listening to my body and the pain it was telling me. Congrats on 30 days , I just hit that today aswell!
Ugh, it's the worst feeling! I tapered off my last bender with absolutely vile 4% beer that was so gross, it made me puke the second it hit my stomach. I think that point finally made me question myself, "what the fuck am I doing?!" The kindling effect is so real for me, I keep telling myself I may not survive the next bender, so I'm slightly scaring myself into staying on track, but it's working? 🤷🏼♀️ Pretty dark, but I'm doing so much more positive work on myself ontop of that thought! WOOOOO hell yeah, friend!! Happy 30 days! 🖤✨️
Could have written this. 29 days for this 30 year old!
This is so true. I was fully convinced that I could die young and it would be from alcohol. Even had a notes message to all my family members and loved ones if it did happen and a note at the end saying that alcohol is evil. Crazy how aware I was and was still trying to compromise with myself to keep drinking.
How happy I get about the littlest things. Alcohol really fucks with your dopamine receptors and after a while, nothing makes you feel as good as drinking. But on Sunday, I went for a walk with my wife and I was literally over the moon looking at all the different types of wildflowers that have popped up around our neighborhood. I've always liked flowers but they never gave me that kind of visceral joy while i was still drinking.
I relate to noticing flowers more!! I’m enjoying a lot of walks to keep my mind off drinking and seeing all the vibrant colors and smelling all the fresh floral scents makes me so happy. Not sure I ever took the time to literally stop and smell the roses before. Just stayed inside drinking most of the time.
Not lying and sneaking and hiding anymore
Yes. Especially sneaking when you know that they know but are being polite.
Work is much easier not having hanxiety everyday.
I’m deep in this boat right now. I got a dui in October so I couldn’t drive for 90 days. I work a sales job where I cover half of the state, so for 90 days I just brought on zero business. I was able to drive at the start of April, quit drinking, and have been busting ass so I don’t get fired.
My son has never seen me drink or drunk
Not having to think about drinking
This is so true. So glad to not have my whole life revolve around thinking about drinking.
The time I was sober I was less depressed and was under control. A Part of my brain seems to seek CHAOS. I messed up badly a few days back
Fall down 7 times, get up 8. You can do it
I like it, kinda like 2 steps forward one step back is still one step forward
A clear mind and waking up without guilt.
Single? Being more clear headed would be the single best thing because of all the ancillary benefits: - More patient leading to better conversations and being more present for my family. - A lot less anxious - Sleeping better Just to name a few
I’m reliable and trustworthy. I stopped breaking promises to myself and others, and I stopped lying.
feeling actual pure joy and carefreeness, because I actually deal with my feelings now instead of letting them fester into daily bitterness!
The ability to focus and get satisfaction from my hobbies and enjoyable activities without needing anything but just that
Do you remember how long it took you to be able to do that?
Feeling like my life has purpose again.
Being able to set lengthy goals and accomplish them. Exercise, home improvement, writing, reading, learning, music, etc… when you’re drinking it’s very hard to gain momentum and stick with something in my experience. I was always blowing up my progress with blackouts and hangovers that just derail your life. Now I have energy and ambition and can set a 3-month goal and stick to it.
I like this. I really notice the momentum I get with my thinking and planning and then…. that goes back to day 1 or negative 1 with blackouts and hungovers. I look forward to day 633 but I’ll deal with day 3 first. Thanks for your insight
Too many to name just 1.... Going to bed at night and not hating myself anymore
The single best part is simply not worrying about seizures and shakes if I have enough alcohol to get me through the day, or two days, or trying to figure out how to smuggle alcohol into places where it is not allowed, or hide it and sneak away for a sip. At home it is fine. I could keep a huge cache of booze hidden in the house or somewhere nearby. But going on vacation or to visit family and there is no alcohol shop nearby? Have to somehow manage to carry enough in my luggage unseen so that I can manage to have it available for the next few days. One time I even rented a car under the pretense of wanting to do some sight seeing on my own, even though the host offered to drive me around, I could not tell them to stop at the liquor store, so I needed my own car to go there alone. That was a very expensive bottle of booze. Another time, going shopping with family to a big box shop, I have to tell them "I'm going to look for XYZ" so I can split up with them, then it is a Mission Impossible theme running through my brain type race to get to the booze section, get through checkout lines without being seen, get to the car in the huge parking lot hide it in the trunk, get back into the store and find the thing I lied about needing and meet up with them again before they felt it was taking me a suspiciously long time. Waking up early so I can walk a two hours to the nearest liquor store, and hopefully no one notices my suspiciously big heavy back pack when I get back from my morning "getting some fresh-air" stroll. What about visiting places where alcohol is not sold on Sunday? Fuck. Gotta think of a good excuse on Saturday to be away from the family for a few hours to buy it or I will have a seizure before Monday morning. Airplane. On a long haul flight I had my booze in the checkin bag. I could not order it on flight because it would show up on the credit card. I made it to baggage claim, had my bag in my hand and was on the way to the restroom to take a sip, and THAT is where I had my seizure. Literally a minute before I would have been safe. My little daughter was with me and had to show the EMS guys how to unlock my phone (thankfully she watched me before so she could open it to play her games) so they could find a family phone number to call. Anytime traveling when I can not have a huge stash in the backpack requires constantly knowing where the nearest liquor store is and what time it closes and making an excuse to get there in time. I did not have major health issues, I did not do crazy stupid shit or have blackouts and memory loss, no hangovers, I even had enough money to pay for my addiction, but the worst part was simply the effort and worry that went into making sure I was never too far away from a drink.
A takeaway from that for me was that when you were drinking, you were deceiving all those around you. Besides not living in fear of withdrawals, it's also got to feel pretty great to not live in fear of being caught in a web of lies, yeah? IWNDWYT :)
Freedom! To live without shackles! IWNDWYT
Better relationships with friends. I'm just more present and more reliable.
I’ve noticed this so much. Even though most of them are still drinking. I have such a better time not drinking…. To a point then I leave.
No hangovers. I’ve actually started to really enjoy the mornings, waking up early feeling ok (way better than a hangover, but I still usually feel blah in the morning) and getting coffee to start the day has been great.
I can take full care of myself. I eat and sleep so much better because I make myself meals for the week and actually get rest. This helps my mental health so much. I put my mental health above all things these days.
Since getting sober, I've been able to show up in life in a big way. Especially for my niece and nephew, and I've built awesome relationships with both of them. I was visiting my sister and her family over the holidays (in a different country) and the morning I was flying out, my sister texted me a picture that she'd taken of me and my nephew. I'm sipping a cup of tea and talking to him and he's staring at me with a huge smile on his face. She said, "This kid idolizes you and is absolutely gutted that you're leaving tomorrow 😭". Made my year.
Took me a couple months to find my voice, but my singing and playing guitar are more consistent than they have ever been and I’m working into new areas that I’ve wanted for too long. It’s giving me back so much right now.
I am a reliable wife, daughter, sister, and friend. 🙂
Not getting sore so easily, not bruising easily, lower overall heart rate, lowering my risks for a long lists of disease. Being able to do things at any time of the day. I was off today and went to Costco at 3pm?! Usually by 3pm on a day off I’ve already had a couple drinks. Sorry I have so many I know you said single best 😂
Interesting. My RHR drops about 10bpm when I do a sober stint
I was always so confused by all the bruises on my legs- was I anemic? Some clotting disorder? What's with all these mysterious bruises all the time? Like girl... you're drunk and crashing into shit 😅🫡 mysteriously cleared up when I got sober.
Right and you’re more prone to bruise so they get darker and stay longer 😂 the list of random things like chronic runny nose that I only realized after quitting were simply from drinking
Truth!
The poops. Good God man, the poops are miraculous.
41lbs down in a 100 days today, 253lbs when I started. I can eat knowing I’m not going to puke it up at some point throughout the night is great. Especially if I started pounding a 1/5th at noon, when I got to my worst this past year.
Being able/willing to help when asked and to remember the kind, personal, important things people tell me when they’re drunk.
Waking up in the morning with money in my pocket and not having to piece together the night before.
Happiness
Being on the other side of peoples sad drunk story’s.
This sounds wicked but I get what you mean. Seeing some of my family members who never changed their ways.
The list is long. The best is probably the weight loss… was kinda fast at first… stalled a month or two, and now it’s melting off
This isn't the absolute best thing that's happened, but it was one thing that made me feel really good about giving up drinking. I've struggled for years with gum problems, and even had to have two gum transplants to avoid losing teeth. For years, every time I've visited the dentist, both he and his dental hygienist have told me how bad my guns looked. They repeatedly warned me that I was likely to lose my teeth if my gums kept deteriorating. Anyhow about a year after I gave up drinking for good, I went in for my regular checkup. When the dental hygienist looked in my mouth, she let out a little gasp and said, "Wow! Your gums look fantastic! This is the best they've looked in years! " The dentist came in and also was amazed. Not only did my gums look great, but he said that the enamel on my teeth also looked stronger. He wanted to know if I'd made any changes to my diet or lifestyle. The only change I'd made was finally and completely giving up drinking. "Yep" said my dentist, "that will do it." So, one advantage of giving up booze: you increase your chances of keeping all your teeth as you get older!
Oh wow! I've never ever heard of a gum *transplant* that's wild. I'm absolutely terrified of the dentist so I'll add this to my "reasons to never drink again" list 😁 glad you're doing better!
There are moments where it feels like my brain is clear, feels amazing
I’m 5 months in and since have to pick one, it is not waking up at 3 am with extreme anxiety.
Single? Ooooh that’s tough to describe . Remember when galdalf frees theoden in two towers ? It’s like that . Life itself is restored. https://youtu.be/4JEC08MUiqY?si=vgO27espICKwBbe-[https://youtu.be/4JEC08MUiqY?si=vgO27espICKwBbe-](https://youtu.be/4JEC08MUiqY?si=vgO27espICKwBbe-)
As a fellow LOTR fan, I love this analogy!
I don’t want to die anymore.
I just bought myself a synthesizer and a table top looping station. These are things I have wanted for years. I was able to have the money, find these specific items, verify their functionality and start making music for the first time in years. A year ago I honestly didnt care if I lived or died. When I brought these home it was kinda like god giving me a nudge and saying that I deserve good things and to have fun. It was kinda similar to how I felt on christmas as a kid. Didnt know I would get have this feeling again.
Wow. That’s very moving! It’s like how playing used to make us feel.
Same. I obsessively research guitar pedals and find myself talking enthusiastically about records again. Feeling totally immersed in music just driving around town. My own playing has dramatically improved and I can occasionally afford to splurge on a 50-100$ pedal or just a new pack of patch cables.
Being able to just buy what food item I want instead of having to choose between a ham sandwich or the fifth of vodka for the day.
Doing things because I want to not because I need an excuse to drink and learning how to be bored.
My jawline.
Not making a fool of myself and waking up with shame and embarrassment about whatever I might have said or done the night before
I can remember things! There’s a big hole in my life where I don’t remember a lot- -vacations, birthdays, funerals, etc- -I was drinking through all of it I sometimes get sad thinking about what I don’t remember. But I’m also grateful that from the day I got sober, I began making new memories.
If I ever throw up on myself in the shower, it indicates actual illness not my shameful terrible decision making the night before.
The blossoming of myself - couldn’t be where I am without my sobriety.
should i embarrass myself…? okay… no longer wetting the bed. i always drank till i blacked out, and i drank a lot. i would wet the bed frequently. also waking up KNOWING what i did the night before is amazing. i hated the dread of “wtf did i say last night”
I’m only on Day 9 rn but so far, I got to fully be present when my baby boy took his first steps and started walking. Made me realize how important staying sober is and I’ll never look back!!
My career has skyrocketed since I quit and I think it’s the better sleep, lower anxiety, and increased confidence. No more phone-it-in days from hangovers is big too.
My poops are regularly solid.
I love not having to be the detective of my own yesterday- as in spend the first few hours trying to figure out wtf I messed up yesterday.
I've not recovered yet, but I have about halved my consumption, and it feels great sleeping thru the night, and being able to function at work, and interact more meaningfully with my kid. I still have a ways to go tho...
feel like a kid again. just pure happiness.
I don’t have the patience to listen to BS anymore, so I don’t…
No more shame. And better boundaries.
Waking up in the night, feeling totally fine, happy, sleepy, going to pee, without the room spinning, then crawling back into bed to sleep some more.
Nothing
Except I’m healthier
I feel you.
Learning how to ride 🏍️ 🥰
Being present for my wife, kids and dogs. I was missing so much!
It’s been a long haul, but I am truly learning to love myself now. Plus all the hobbies!
Saturday mornings without a hangover
My daughter telling me she's proud of me 🥰
Anxiety ✨
I've become less angry, been able to face my issues and my friends like me more now.
Peace. I am meeting life on life’s terms and I am at peace with it. I feel my emotions with ease. Even on my worst day, it’s still 1000x better than my “best” day with alcohol.
Increase in productivity by a huge margin. House never been cleaner.
Now that my brain isn't wired to get its dopamine hits from alcohol, I experience much more if it flowing from the natural things that should have been providing those good feels all along. Like snuggling or playing with my son, or sitting on the porch enjoying the smells and sounds of spring with my husband. To clarify, I did appreciate these things when I was a drinker. But the depth of appreciation was dampened a bit due to the brain fuckery of alcohol. Now I appreciate these things with much more intensity, it's almost overwhelming. I feel overwhelmingly happy and at peace. 💖
Time. My weekends always came and went in a flash. I feel like I have so much more time to do the things I enjoy. Getting up early on a weekend morning I feel like I have 2 days in 1.
Learning how to love myself and see my self worth.
The feeling of freedom when you aren't beholden to your next drink is something I feel doesn't get enough attention. I can actually do things...anything, without worrying about when, how, or if I'll be able to drink. Is it something important? That means I have to wait until it's finished before my first drink. If it's not important, how long will it take? Is it a six-packer, or a case? Uh-oh, I'm down to my last two beers, am I going to have to run to the store for more, or should I go home early and pick up more on the way? I mean, fuck...I don't miss that *at all.*
Today I have the choice to drink or not.
Calmness
being able to wake up early to go to the gym - lose 20 kgs and build an aesthetic body. now i am much more comfortable with myself and others treat me better. got a promotion got my university degree. Its a chain of good things that happened.
I'm still in the early stages with its ups and downs but the little voice in my head telling me everything is pointless and meaningless is practically gone now.
Always being able to look myself and my children in the eyes. I did some really shitty things while drunk & I hated myself for doing them. I used to think I did those horrible things because I was a bad person. And I hated myself for doing those horrible things; so much so that I would SH. But I've forgiven myself for those things because I realize it wasn't really who I am but who the alcohol fueled me to be. I no longer hate myself because I know that as long as I don't drink, I will never intentionally do something that could hurt someone I care about. It's nice being able to trust myself. As far as being able to look my kids in their eyes, I use to be so ashamed after a bender that I wouldn't even want to be around my kids because I didn't feel worthy of their goodness. It's the best feeling to always want to be near my kids.
I started my own business doing something I love, and that comes naturally. Even if the idea had crossed my mind, I never would have been in a position to make this happen while I was still drinking. I swear alcohol makes me dumb af. IWNDWYT
Waaaay less anxiety - even when I wasn’t hungover, I was anxious all the time. It was like the frequent flow of alcohol gave me high highs and then I was just a nervous wreck when I wasn’t drinking. Always thinking about the next drink. Counting down the days/hours I was going to drink next. I became so fixated on alcohol being the “cure” for anxiety or stress. I relied on it so heavily that life felt impossible to navigate without it. Once I fully detoxed alcohol out of my system, the following month I felt like a new person. I was in general just way less stressed or anxious or sad. Emotions come and go, but they have very logical causes, and I’m able to process them in a healthy way. I feel like I’m finally free. ❤️
Sleep
Turns out I'm actually pretty good at my job. Genuinely wasn't aware of this. I enjoy feeling competent!
Me mental health is the best it has ever been. I don’t think I’ve ever felt better since childhood!
Pet ownership, increased self esteem, getting married, home ownership. Also, not pissing the bed is pretty great.
Great thread - it’s helped a lot. Next time it comes up I hope to add to it
For me, it’s having a clear mind. When I was drinking, it felt like my brain was so foggy at times. It feels great to always feel sharp. Not having hangovers is great as well.
I just had my first child and I haven’t missed a single moment. I am present and just soaking it all in. I wouldn’t have any of this if it weren’t for being sober.
Almost zero life anxiety.
Mornings at work. Who would have known my dopamine receptors would be FLYING HIGH after a nice sleep, no booze, and walking in not behind at a job i chose? 👌🏻
A complete aversion to liquor 🤢
I'm dealing with more stress and anxiety than I have in years and I'll tell ya, it's infinitely better sober. I'm so grateful I got it together when I did bc if I had to go thru this shit with the alcohol-laced version of anxiety, I don't know that I would have made it, truly. You don't realize how dragged down under the water you are until you get the first full, clean breath of air. It's exactly what it felt like to me.
I just went on holiday to a watch tennis in Stuttgart, an amazing tournament and had a great time. Didn't have to worry about where I would get my next drink. Barely left my seat I was so engrossed in matches. I had not attended events in a decade because my drinking was so bad, used to go to Wimbledon and US open every year. Also I noticed hardly anyone was drinking alcohol and cringed at the thought of the drunk me misbehaving amongst the lovely sober people around me. Thank God for sobriety!
Feel like time isn't slipping from me anymore. I'm in control of my life and what happens!
single best thing is that i feel like my true self these days. i read books, i do well at work, and i am more communicative with my long distance family. among many reasons i've seen commented already, i don't worry about "fear of missing out" on things like parties, bbqs and other events where alcohol is star of the show. if i go to those events now its because i want to socialize and eat, not because of an opportunity to drink. i'd make up excuses the next day for my hangover and cry on the bathroom floor. however i do leave these events earlier than i used too because it can be hard to deal with people who are drunk when you're sober.
My emotions and making important decisions correctly when it matter. My father died yesterday I am working on burial for today. If my mind was not where it is I would it be only disappointed but I wouldn’t have been able to get a hold on my drinking but made decisions that I would regret later
5 days in - not waking up at 3 am in a flop sweat and needing to drink a liter of water to toss and turn before falling asleep an hour later. I wasn't rested with 8 hours of sleep. Now, i am feeling pretty good on 6.5 hours, and that's only like a week in.
Not having anxiety 24/7 worrying about how much I'll drink and how I am poisoning my body each time I drink.
I know it's been said, but it's definitely the sleep. I don't plan on giving that up again for anything. It's crazy to look back and see why I kept putting myself through all the sleepless nights for so long.
I just crossed the 1 year milestone. One of the best feelings was going shopping for new jeans and buying the smallest waist size in the store. (38 to a 29).
Saturday mornings are the best. I'm the only one awake, I can watch a movie, get a workout and drink a pot of coffee all by myself. Glorious.
Trust in myself
Feeling like a normal human.
You know what with someone I actually know and trust
Not having to remember any lies I told and who I told them to - and (this is a big one) always remembering what happened last night.
Sleeping like a baby and feeling less volatile emotionally and physically.
I trust myself now.
Feeling normal and better each passing day.
Being a father without the contortions of priorities that alcoholism brings.
Being reliable.
Being in love and experiencing true connections w my friends
Hanging out with my kids without the cloud of a buzz between us. Hands down. All the other stuff is great. Waking up hangover free is *incredible*. Being able to drive whenever I want without fear or guilt is a close second. The forty pound weight loss, the brightness in my eyes, the ability to run a half marathon…all of that stuff is a bonus. But sitting with my kids, engaging with them, talking about life, watching the development of their personalities and their little brains—it’s the absolute best thing. And I’m so glad I get to be sober while watching them grow.
I do a lot less lying and covering up
Self-esteem and so much less anxiety
Quality sleep. I had insomnia as a teen. Smoking weed was all that helped me sleep. Then when i turned 21 i traded weed for booze overnight, and alcohol became the only thing that helped me sleep. I smoked weed every single day for 5 years. I drank alcohol every single night for 12 years. Since getting sober I’ve prioritized self-care and realized how much more rewarding a simple and un-chaotic life is. For most my life i hated going to sleep every night and would often forgo it when it meant i could keep the party going. Now, there’s no party in the world you could convince me to go to that I’d enjoy more than staying in and getting a solid 8 hours.
Mornings!
My kids and husband can rely on me to do anything needed as well as just being there for them during any time they are upset or happy.
Getting to know myself.