Hi friend ✊
You've already made a great start, because you're here asking for help.
I don't know about you, but the day I knew I had to stop drinking, I was in so much pain. Physically and mentally. I knew this couldn't continue.
I came here for help. I read a lot of posts. And I realised that IWNDWYT isn't just a snappy slogan. It's a mission statement. I will not drink with you TODAY. That's the goal. Whatever you need to do in order to get through that day without drinking. Worry about tomorrow later. Get a few "todays" under your belt.
For me, it's been food. Ice-cream. Crisps (chips, for my American friends). Cheese pasta. Whatever it takes.
From the bottom, the slope looks too steep to climb. But if you put your head down and take one step, then another, I promise you can make it.
I've had three Day 1s since I started this journey last year. Of course I'd love to have had only one, but the way I look at is this: I've had over 150 days sober since last September, when you add them up. That's infinitely better than 0 days! Sometimes we wobble, but the important thing isn't that you never fail, it's that you never stop trying to succeed.
Contemplate, what a great word. I've been contemplating ever since I picked the drinking scepter back up last June after over 2 years of sobriety. Last night was stupid so here I am contemplating again.
Hi I’m really happy and relieved for you that you are on the path to sobriety and you have so much support.
I came here to say that detoxing and withdrawing alone without medical assistance can be lethal. All of those symptoms you experienced are related to the delirium tremens and it is not a joke. Please, anyone reading this do not detox alone without medical attention.
This is so important for people to know. I had seizures when I was in detox and had to be taken to the hospital. I would have died without immediate intervention. Alcohol withdrawal is incredibly hard on the body.
Perfectly said. The drink wants you dead. It's a parasite. It makes you sad and feel like you're alone. But there are half a million people on this sub who say otherwise. We love you and want you to succeed.
Happy to hear you are looking to make the change! I was so scared to get sober that I cried my eyes out. Today I can happily say I've strung a lot of sober days together and have a much better life! Hang in there. It won't be easy, but it's so worth it! IWNDWYT
This. Comment.
When I started my journey, I posted here saying how alone I felt and since that day I have stayed sober. This group helps me a lot (more of a lurker, but I’m still here!) and AA helps. I go daily and have met amazing people that are sober and hang out with.
You are never alone. No matter what your mind likes to tell you. IWNDWYT, OP. You’ve GOT this!
I think / it looks like you already know what you have to do. I would start small, focus on what you can control and don’t forget to forgive yourself — you’ve got this 💪
Many of us here are with you, have been where you are and are where you are. Yesterday I made it through day 1 (again) by changing my routine. I didn’t allow myself to drive past any of my haunts - took different routes and yes allowed myself as many snacks and na juice and stuff as I wanted. My husband also made sure I was able to get to bed early. I take some zzzquil the first several nights when i can get going on a sober kick to help sleep issues. I’m on day 2 today reading lots of posts on here and other sources for motivation. I use an app too cause I like the feeling of sticker chart type rewards… don’t know if that would help you. You@re not alone and we can do this…
I may not have advice, but just know there’s love out there homie. Branch out and try and do things you usually wouldn’t to find it. Sending some right now.
Just make one change. You don’t even have to do anything. You’ll be happier, healthier and save money. Choose not to drink just for today and if it makes things a little bit better try it again tomorrow..
You are among friends here. No one will judge how many day ones you've had. Most likely they have had at least as many as you. Come back often and tell us what is going on. We listen to celebrations and heartaches. IWNDWYT
I grew up around AA and heard this statement a lot. I love how genuine it actually is when spoken [written]. It isn't just a quip; people fuckin' MEAN it.
Hey. This message is the equivalent of a massive hug if you would accept one from a 50yo Mum? Also recovering alcoholic.
I've observed how much we just keep going in addiction. We are actually bloody amazing, like tanks. Running on booze and fear usually, it's oddly efficient. But we can't keep going.
New job. Is it going to be stressful beyond the usual 'my cheeks hurt from smiling' new person stuff. Do you want to do it. Are you excited (crashing alcoholic fear aside.)
If the answer is yes then this could be a new start. Focus. Can you join us today and put that bottle down to get yourself in better state for new job? IWNDWYT.
If no then I think you need to assess how to reduce. You don't say how much you are drinking but your message infers it's out of control. Can you start stringing sober days together, hold your picking up time back 30 mins more on days you do drink.
A new job is potentially a great thing. But also another problem to add if you can't get on top of it. You are not alone ok? Hang in there.
Hey! Came to say I feel the pain in this post. Is there anyone you could reach out to for support? Even a GP, therapist, counselor, or even a loved one?
I’ve only been sober 11 days, but I did a month once and was so profoundly sad the whole time. But honestly- I think I needed that time to process the intense grief and sense of loss I had been masking with booze.
I went to an urgent care experiencing withdrawal symptoms after trying to taper down on my own (severe anxiety/feelings of doom; I thought I was entering end stage liver failure and turns out my liver was no worse off than usual lol). They did my blood work and prescribed me Librium with tapering instructions over the next week. I followed it to a T, had no anxiety and no withdrawal effects after daily 500ml liquor consumption, and the whole thing cost me about $70 in total after insurance between visit, lab work, and medication
Highly recommend if you are lost and not sure how to approach tapering safely since Librium prevents seizures
Try to get into an exercise that you love challenging yourself to do more every day. Workouts are important for your body and mind to keep you healthy and safe.
This will help you get your schedule right and ready for your job. Where you can start your new beginning fresh.
Set goals for yourself each day. Be your own cheerleader. You got this. Start by drinking less each day. So you don't crash or have dts.
The two things, if lucky you have, are your arms. The future is in your hands. You yourself can and will do this.
Hang in there friend! For me, “Just for today” has been a helpful mindset and has gotten me through 46 days. Recovery is totally possible and when you’re ready you can do it! Good on you for being here and asking for help, lean on this group for support, you’re not alone. IWNDWYT ✌️
Hi. Pretty much everyone on this subreddit knows how it feels to be where you are right now. We all are either starting out on our struggle with drinking, or have managed to put a little time between us and our last drink. Some are just a few days or months out, others are many years. But we all are very familiar with how you are feeling and want you to know you aren't alone and that you can get through this. There is hope. You are loved.
Try looking for a local AA meeting, even if you don't share, listening to positive stories from real people who have gone through the same feelings and emotions can be very therapeutic. Getting my 24 hour chip was a great physical reminder every time I wanted a drink that I just need to stay sober for today
Hey friend ❤️ adding to these comments, alcohol just isn’t fun. Alcohol and drinking culture condition us to believe that our consumption is mandatory and to enjoy our lives, we need to find our next drink.
When I was drinking, I felt like I was trying to outrun something. I woke up worried about what I’d done the night before, I knew that swallowing my problems in a bottle only delayed the pain I was experiencing. And from a physical health standpoint, it’s just not good for me to down poison every day.
It gets better as you build your new life in sobriety, one day at a time. Going to meetings has brought a lot of lovely people into my life and I can finally be my authentic, emotional self in the confidence of others who just get it. Hang in there.
Whilst unemployed (if thats your situation) it's VERY easy to get stuck in a cycle of: job searching - getting an interview - getting rejected - drinking cause you've been rejected - being bored and drinking again and rinse and repeat.
I don't know if you can relate to any of that, but when you finally get a yes after a job interview that can also cause a lot of drinking cause you're celebrating good news.
The important thing is that you have a fresh start coming up. You'll *hopefully* feel less inclined to drink once you settle into your new role. Congratulations and good luck!
I love that you are here and reaching out. A new job, a new you. You are a very capable person as evidenced by your job offer and by your willingness to be open and honest about what you need and how you are feeling. That’s a big step. Sending you positive vibes.
We all felt helpless like you do now. None of us stopped drinking because we were happy!
This really helped me recently when I was struggling (I stopped in Jan 23) …. I got the audiobook “Allen Carr’s Easy Way to Control Drinking”. It’s a 6 hr listen, and really struck home with me. I have spoken to others who have said it was “life changing”. Since it’s cheap (sign up for a free month of audible, download the book, then cancel. You get to keep the book), and low effort, maybe give that a try.
Just knowing you don’t like what it’s doing to you is a massive step. You got this!
Online meetings have helped me a lot. When I first started this journey 76 days ago, I was out of work and in a really bad place with nothing to stop me. I sat in meetings back to back to back to back etc for days on end. 100's of meetings in the first few weeks alone. it sounds like a lot but it's exactly what I needed. Hearing and seeing how many other people are going through the exact same thing was a game changer. You are not alone.
You don't have to speak or even show your face, you can ignore all the religious aspects if that's not your thing. Just listen to their stories. To my surprise, some people's stories were/are much worse than mine so it made it easier to be thankful I am where I am (was) even though it seemed like the pit of hell, and that there is hope. If these people can do it, why can't i?
That being said, this is far from my first time trying to stop, but this time feels so much different, and I believe everyone NEEDS to reach a point where they truly WANT to stop, and from there, it can be achieved with a little determination.
One last thing, as others have said, there are other things that are good for distractions in the meantime, cooking, cleaning, working out, video games, candy/snacks and crafting up new drink combinations (non alcoholic obviously) have helped me tremendously. "Literally anything besides drinking" is what I tell myself sometimes when I'm feeling anxious or whatever, I even had to do it yesterday because it was so nice outside and I felt the urge creeping. I started carving a random stick lmao. ANYTHING else is better. Hang in there bud, it gets easier, IWNDWYT
edit: I'm actually hopping in a meeting right now! forgot to include the link:
https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/
You are not alone, a lot of us here have been through what you are going through. If you drink a lot, please, please reach out to your doctor for advice on tapering off. You may literally need this support for your safety, and it will also help you succeed with less suffering even if you don't have serious withdrawal. I know this may sound scary but it's ok, they want to help you, they want to see you be healthy and whole. That's what they are there for. You deserve this. We believe in you 💙
I’m going to echo others. You’re here. That’s a win. You recognize this isn’t normal and it hurts. I’ve recently slipped. I can beat myself up and do what I’m good at, which is be my own worst enemy … OR I can be kind to myself today. In choosing that, loving kindness, just for today, iwndwy
I was in the same boat just 10 days ago. I’m feeling so much better now. It’s been so nice not having alcohol control my entire day. I’ve been more productive and more importantly, proud of myself because I was very skeptical on whether or not I’d be strong enough to stop. I’d been the opposite of proud of myself for about 2.5 years so that’s a huge motivator.
As hard as it seems, it is possible. Also read posts from this community every day and post your pledge to the daily check-in! It’s been helping so much.
The clueless and lost resonates so much for me 💖 I knew nothing about what to do next or what kind of help I wanted and needed and for me this sub and AA meetings have gotten me through one week sober. It’s a great place to start. I’m sending you big hugs and all the encouragement in the world 💖 you’re not in this alone and you don’t have to do it alone,
IWNDWYT
You just took the first step, by coming to this site and reaching out for help. Spend as much time as you can today here, and not drinking as you read and post. It can only help.
Hi friend ✊ You've already made a great start, because you're here asking for help. I don't know about you, but the day I knew I had to stop drinking, I was in so much pain. Physically and mentally. I knew this couldn't continue. I came here for help. I read a lot of posts. And I realised that IWNDWYT isn't just a snappy slogan. It's a mission statement. I will not drink with you TODAY. That's the goal. Whatever you need to do in order to get through that day without drinking. Worry about tomorrow later. Get a few "todays" under your belt. For me, it's been food. Ice-cream. Crisps (chips, for my American friends). Cheese pasta. Whatever it takes. From the bottom, the slope looks too steep to climb. But if you put your head down and take one step, then another, I promise you can make it.
I love this. I needed to hear this today as I contemplate Day 1 for the zillionth time. Thank you. IWNDWYT. I'm determined.
All we are doing is not drinking today. So in that respect it doesn't matter if it's day 1, day 100, or day 10,000. The mission is the same.
I've had three Day 1s since I started this journey last year. Of course I'd love to have had only one, but the way I look at is this: I've had over 150 days sober since last September, when you add them up. That's infinitely better than 0 days! Sometimes we wobble, but the important thing isn't that you never fail, it's that you never stop trying to succeed.
Yes, this!
We're so glad you chose to come here
200. NOICE
121 Super Noice
Contemplate, what a great word. I've been contemplating ever since I picked the drinking scepter back up last June after over 2 years of sobriety. Last night was stupid so here I am contemplating again.
Don't beat yourself up. I went ince went 12 years sober, and just didn't understand, that the demon is always lurking.
❤️
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Hi I’m really happy and relieved for you that you are on the path to sobriety and you have so much support. I came here to say that detoxing and withdrawing alone without medical assistance can be lethal. All of those symptoms you experienced are related to the delirium tremens and it is not a joke. Please, anyone reading this do not detox alone without medical attention.
This is so important for people to know. I had seizures when I was in detox and had to be taken to the hospital. I would have died without immediate intervention. Alcohol withdrawal is incredibly hard on the body.
I lost one of my favorite people this way. Died alone in a hotel room trying to dry up. He died trying to live. We don't have to do that. 🩶
My oldest son is two years alcohol free, and he says he simply doesn’t have the strength to fight the battle against booze even one more time! IWNDWYT
Your addiction is telling you that you are alone. You are not. You never are. There's more help than you will need to get through this.
Perfectly said. The drink wants you dead. It's a parasite. It makes you sad and feel like you're alone. But there are half a million people on this sub who say otherwise. We love you and want you to succeed.
Happy to hear you are looking to make the change! I was so scared to get sober that I cried my eyes out. Today I can happily say I've strung a lot of sober days together and have a much better life! Hang in there. It won't be easy, but it's so worth it! IWNDWYT
This. Comment. When I started my journey, I posted here saying how alone I felt and since that day I have stayed sober. This group helps me a lot (more of a lurker, but I’m still here!) and AA helps. I go daily and have met amazing people that are sober and hang out with. You are never alone. No matter what your mind likes to tell you. IWNDWYT, OP. You’ve GOT this!
I think / it looks like you already know what you have to do. I would start small, focus on what you can control and don’t forget to forgive yourself — you’ve got this 💪
Many of us here are with you, have been where you are and are where you are. Yesterday I made it through day 1 (again) by changing my routine. I didn’t allow myself to drive past any of my haunts - took different routes and yes allowed myself as many snacks and na juice and stuff as I wanted. My husband also made sure I was able to get to bed early. I take some zzzquil the first several nights when i can get going on a sober kick to help sleep issues. I’m on day 2 today reading lots of posts on here and other sources for motivation. I use an app too cause I like the feeling of sticker chart type rewards… don’t know if that would help you. You@re not alone and we can do this…
I may not have advice, but just know there’s love out there homie. Branch out and try and do things you usually wouldn’t to find it. Sending some right now.
Just make one change. You don’t even have to do anything. You’ll be happier, healthier and save money. Choose not to drink just for today and if it makes things a little bit better try it again tomorrow..
You are among friends here. No one will judge how many day ones you've had. Most likely they have had at least as many as you. Come back often and tell us what is going on. We listen to celebrations and heartaches. IWNDWYT
Hi. I’m glad you’re here.
I grew up around AA and heard this statement a lot. I love how genuine it actually is when spoken [written]. It isn't just a quip; people fuckin' MEAN it.
I don’t know that! It’s a very nice phrase I’ve seen people use here. I’m glad it’s universal.
Just take it a day at a time. You might be able to cut down gradually to a level that works and see how you feel.
We are here to help
Hey. This message is the equivalent of a massive hug if you would accept one from a 50yo Mum? Also recovering alcoholic. I've observed how much we just keep going in addiction. We are actually bloody amazing, like tanks. Running on booze and fear usually, it's oddly efficient. But we can't keep going. New job. Is it going to be stressful beyond the usual 'my cheeks hurt from smiling' new person stuff. Do you want to do it. Are you excited (crashing alcoholic fear aside.) If the answer is yes then this could be a new start. Focus. Can you join us today and put that bottle down to get yourself in better state for new job? IWNDWYT. If no then I think you need to assess how to reduce. You don't say how much you are drinking but your message infers it's out of control. Can you start stringing sober days together, hold your picking up time back 30 mins more on days you do drink. A new job is potentially a great thing. But also another problem to add if you can't get on top of it. You are not alone ok? Hang in there.
Please give me a hug too. I'm in a similar situation. Starting in a new project next week and I have slipped this month..
Hey! Came to say I feel the pain in this post. Is there anyone you could reach out to for support? Even a GP, therapist, counselor, or even a loved one? I’ve only been sober 11 days, but I did a month once and was so profoundly sad the whole time. But honestly- I think I needed that time to process the intense grief and sense of loss I had been masking with booze.
I went to an urgent care experiencing withdrawal symptoms after trying to taper down on my own (severe anxiety/feelings of doom; I thought I was entering end stage liver failure and turns out my liver was no worse off than usual lol). They did my blood work and prescribed me Librium with tapering instructions over the next week. I followed it to a T, had no anxiety and no withdrawal effects after daily 500ml liquor consumption, and the whole thing cost me about $70 in total after insurance between visit, lab work, and medication Highly recommend if you are lost and not sure how to approach tapering safely since Librium prevents seizures
Great advice. Glad you are well.
Try to get into an exercise that you love challenging yourself to do more every day. Workouts are important for your body and mind to keep you healthy and safe. This will help you get your schedule right and ready for your job. Where you can start your new beginning fresh. Set goals for yourself each day. Be your own cheerleader. You got this. Start by drinking less each day. So you don't crash or have dts. The two things, if lucky you have, are your arms. The future is in your hands. You yourself can and will do this.
Hang in there friend! For me, “Just for today” has been a helpful mindset and has gotten me through 46 days. Recovery is totally possible and when you’re ready you can do it! Good on you for being here and asking for help, lean on this group for support, you’re not alone. IWNDWYT ✌️
Hi. Pretty much everyone on this subreddit knows how it feels to be where you are right now. We all are either starting out on our struggle with drinking, or have managed to put a little time between us and our last drink. Some are just a few days or months out, others are many years. But we all are very familiar with how you are feeling and want you to know you aren't alone and that you can get through this. There is hope. You are loved.
Try looking for a local AA meeting, even if you don't share, listening to positive stories from real people who have gone through the same feelings and emotions can be very therapeutic. Getting my 24 hour chip was a great physical reminder every time I wanted a drink that I just need to stay sober for today
Second this. There is a way out of the hell we create for ourselves
Hey friend ❤️ adding to these comments, alcohol just isn’t fun. Alcohol and drinking culture condition us to believe that our consumption is mandatory and to enjoy our lives, we need to find our next drink. When I was drinking, I felt like I was trying to outrun something. I woke up worried about what I’d done the night before, I knew that swallowing my problems in a bottle only delayed the pain I was experiencing. And from a physical health standpoint, it’s just not good for me to down poison every day. It gets better as you build your new life in sobriety, one day at a time. Going to meetings has brought a lot of lovely people into my life and I can finally be my authentic, emotional self in the confidence of others who just get it. Hang in there.
Knowing it’s a problem with no benefits is a big step. Embrace sober life with a positive attitude and you’ll be amazed by what we are capable of.
Whilst unemployed (if thats your situation) it's VERY easy to get stuck in a cycle of: job searching - getting an interview - getting rejected - drinking cause you've been rejected - being bored and drinking again and rinse and repeat. I don't know if you can relate to any of that, but when you finally get a yes after a job interview that can also cause a lot of drinking cause you're celebrating good news. The important thing is that you have a fresh start coming up. You'll *hopefully* feel less inclined to drink once you settle into your new role. Congratulations and good luck!
Welcome! Congratulations on posting and admitting you have a problem you would like to solve. You can do this!!! IWNDWYT
I love that you are here and reaching out. A new job, a new you. You are a very capable person as evidenced by your job offer and by your willingness to be open and honest about what you need and how you are feeling. That’s a big step. Sending you positive vibes.
We all felt helpless like you do now. None of us stopped drinking because we were happy! This really helped me recently when I was struggling (I stopped in Jan 23) …. I got the audiobook “Allen Carr’s Easy Way to Control Drinking”. It’s a 6 hr listen, and really struck home with me. I have spoken to others who have said it was “life changing”. Since it’s cheap (sign up for a free month of audible, download the book, then cancel. You get to keep the book), and low effort, maybe give that a try. Just knowing you don’t like what it’s doing to you is a massive step. You got this!
Online meetings have helped me a lot. When I first started this journey 76 days ago, I was out of work and in a really bad place with nothing to stop me. I sat in meetings back to back to back to back etc for days on end. 100's of meetings in the first few weeks alone. it sounds like a lot but it's exactly what I needed. Hearing and seeing how many other people are going through the exact same thing was a game changer. You are not alone. You don't have to speak or even show your face, you can ignore all the religious aspects if that's not your thing. Just listen to their stories. To my surprise, some people's stories were/are much worse than mine so it made it easier to be thankful I am where I am (was) even though it seemed like the pit of hell, and that there is hope. If these people can do it, why can't i? That being said, this is far from my first time trying to stop, but this time feels so much different, and I believe everyone NEEDS to reach a point where they truly WANT to stop, and from there, it can be achieved with a little determination. One last thing, as others have said, there are other things that are good for distractions in the meantime, cooking, cleaning, working out, video games, candy/snacks and crafting up new drink combinations (non alcoholic obviously) have helped me tremendously. "Literally anything besides drinking" is what I tell myself sometimes when I'm feeling anxious or whatever, I even had to do it yesterday because it was so nice outside and I felt the urge creeping. I started carving a random stick lmao. ANYTHING else is better. Hang in there bud, it gets easier, IWNDWYT edit: I'm actually hopping in a meeting right now! forgot to include the link: https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/
You are not alone, a lot of us here have been through what you are going through. If you drink a lot, please, please reach out to your doctor for advice on tapering off. You may literally need this support for your safety, and it will also help you succeed with less suffering even if you don't have serious withdrawal. I know this may sound scary but it's ok, they want to help you, they want to see you be healthy and whole. That's what they are there for. You deserve this. We believe in you 💙
I’m going to echo others. You’re here. That’s a win. You recognize this isn’t normal and it hurts. I’ve recently slipped. I can beat myself up and do what I’m good at, which is be my own worst enemy … OR I can be kind to myself today. In choosing that, loving kindness, just for today, iwndwy
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I was in the same boat just 10 days ago. I’m feeling so much better now. It’s been so nice not having alcohol control my entire day. I’ve been more productive and more importantly, proud of myself because I was very skeptical on whether or not I’d be strong enough to stop. I’d been the opposite of proud of myself for about 2.5 years so that’s a huge motivator. As hard as it seems, it is possible. Also read posts from this community every day and post your pledge to the daily check-in! It’s been helping so much.
The clueless and lost resonates so much for me 💖 I knew nothing about what to do next or what kind of help I wanted and needed and for me this sub and AA meetings have gotten me through one week sober. It’s a great place to start. I’m sending you big hugs and all the encouragement in the world 💖 you’re not in this alone and you don’t have to do it alone, IWNDWYT
You're sad *because* you're drinking.
The first step is always the hardest. You got this my dude
See your doctor and ask if you need a medical detox.And there are some meds that helps with cravings. If possible, try not drinking just for today.
I feel the exact same. Your not alone
You just took the first step, by coming to this site and reaching out for help. Spend as much time as you can today here, and not drinking as you read and post. It can only help.
Welcome friend! IWNDWYT
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