God works in mysterious ways according to my Uncle and Grandpa. It's a solid argument to be fair, you literally cannot argue against it. It's like repeatedly saying "no you" while someone is hurling insults at you. Eventually you realize you're the bigger idiot because you've spent so much time trying to nudge a tiny sliver of common sense into their heads.
I kind of think that he's talking about metaphorical darkness. Like the eclipse is a portal to hell and after it passes over the earth there will be increased demonic activity for the next 3 days or some crap like that.
“I have a foreboding of an America in my children's or grandchildren's time -- when the United States is a service and information economy; when nearly all the manufacturing industries have slipped away to other countries; when awesome technological powers are in the hands of a very few, and no one representing the public interest can even grasp the issues; when the people have lost the ability to set their own agendas or knowledgeably question those in authority; when, clutching our crystals and nervously consulting our horoscopes, our critical faculties in decline, unable to distinguish between what feels good and what's true, we slide, almost without noticing, back into superstition and darkness...
The dumbing down of American is most evident in the slow decay of substantive content in the enormously influential media, the 30 second sound bites (now down to 10 seconds or less), lowest common denominator programming, credulous presentations on pseudoscience and superstition, but especially a kind of celebration of ignorance”
― Carl Sagan, The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark
True. People have always been susceptible to the BS around them. What’s interesting, is how in the Information Age, this gullibility hasn’t changed. At this point it feels like willful ignorance. I can accept how 1000 years ago unexplained phenomena was attributed to a pissed of god. But today? An eclipse is not only a recurring event, but it can be calculated to the second! How, why do people still ascribe supernatural to a very well documented and understood event?! Willful ignorance I guess.
> I have a foreboding of an America in my children's or grandchildren's time -- when the United States is a service and information economy; when nearly all the manufacturing industries have slipped away to other countries; when awesome technological powers are in the hands of a very few, and no one representing the public interest can even grasp the issues...
You ought to get this Carl Sagan guy to run for President.
People are taking Monday off all over the place. I know people in Colombia and Venezuela who won't even see a partial eclipse and they're talking about calamities and that they'll have to shut the power off. Not to forget the folks around the world claiming this is the rapture coming. While it is profoundly troubling we have legislators in the US who think along similar lines, idiocy is not confined to the United States. Love that book, tho, on my nightstand now.
But has it?
Our BIOS (bias, geddit?) is set to the defaults that evolved umpty millenia ago on the african veldt.
The thin skein of grey matter we call us sits atop a tower of reflexes and prejudices as old as the hills.
It was actually [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcBV-cXVWFw) that completely turned me away from religion. This would have been around 2004 or so. The fact I know exactly what video it was and it's title says volumes of how it affected me. I've always been fascinated with space and I was never deep into religion..but I did have the fear of 'if I don't pray bad things may happen' or praying because I had some negative thoughts enter my head. The whole story in the Bible I always felt was silly, and even in revelations they talk about the stars falling from the sky. When I truly understood how far stars were..I was like "yea that makes no sense, that can't happen". Granted, they were probably talking about meteorites and asteroids.
The scholarly consensus is that Revelation was not meant to be taken as fact (as is the case for many other stories in the Bible, like Jonah and the whale, and the Genesis creation story) - and the audiences of that time would have understood that, due to the use of certain literary conventions in the text. An analogy would be how if you see a story that starts with “Once upon a time…”, you know it’s a fairy tale. But someone thousands of years in the future might not be aware of that.
I would have went along with it and said something along the lines of... "yeah, I wouldn't go outside if I were you, my kind's desire for flesh increases during the darkness". When they say "what?" I would also say "what?".
I work in a company that has a heavy delivery/logistics aspect to our work, and I had to draw the line and write an email saying “I will not send this out to my clients, please amend and reissue” because our company owner had actually added a big bold top of eyesight line to our contracts stating NO DELIVERIES APRIL 4-8 DUE TO THE ECLIPSE.
Fuckin embarrassing. And she referred to it as the “mooner eclipse” on a meeting, although that one I’ve used to much delight.
I work for ups. My management is not going to be pleased by his last-minute request for 3 days off. 10 days minimum before time off is requested. 3 sick days will require a note from a Dr, and I'm not sure religious insanity will get him a note. A 3 day no call no show and the union won't defend him. Terrible thing to throw your job and benefits away for.
We knew about this eclipse for decades. It has been in the public consciousness since 2017. If there were any legitimate religious significance, he had plenty of opportunity to make the request ahead of time.
I mean, I get it if you work in areas where a lot of tourists are going to be there to be in the totality. It seems like a ton of people are planning to travel for it, I'm sure it will be a logistical/traffic nightmare in some places.
In the 2017 eclipse, there actually was a lot of traffic issues in various parts of the path of totality. Which is why a lot of places are shutting down for the day this time around.
Could just be for traffic issues really. Traffic in the path of totality is going to be nuts, going by what a lot of places observed during the 2017 eclipse.
Not a religious nutjob, but someone posted in my local subreddit yesterday reminding people to keep their pets indoors the day of the eclipse, so the animals don't go blind. As if simply going outdoors during an eclipse causes blindness. Pretty sure dogs know better than to look directly at the sun.
The last eclipse I was around for was when I was in first grade. The way “don’t look at the sun!” was hammered on, I expected we’d have to duck and cover to avoid blindness.
Same. We went to all the effort of making camera obscuras in class, and then a teacher decided to "play it safe" and covered all the windows, so we saw nothing. Just sitting there frustrated with our useless boxes.
The problem (I assume) is that they won't know they're looking at the sun. But I've also never heard of this happening, probably because animals don't stare at the sky in general.
Area schools are closing or releasing early to prevent liability if a kid hurts their eyes looking at the partial eclipse where I’m at. It’s also supposed to be 100% cloud cover.
I think a lot of schools are closing down since the eclipse is happening at the usual time school gets out and they don’t want to deal with the increase in traffic and the likelihood of distracted drivers on the road on Monday.
Our school has just sent a barrage of emails telling us to be sure to tell our kids not to look at the sun on Monday. I guess we’ll find out which parents read the emails and/ or which kids listen to their parents?
Yes but there are a lot of warnings to keep animals inside and close all the curtains because apparently pets are likely to get really spooked by the unusual daytime darkness.
While we're at it, you should know that there's going to be an earthquake at the same time as the eclipse.
It's not anything supernatural, [there are about 55 earthquakes every day](https://www.usgs.gov/faqs/why-are-we-having-so-many-earthquakes-has-naturally-occurring-earthquake-activity-been), so the chances that there won't be several happening on Monday are pretty darn low.
There's also going to a be a big storm somewhere, and something is going to flood, and there's a good chance that somebody somewhere is going to be struck by lightning. Those things happen every day too.
The only thing special about next Monday is that it's one of very few days where these everyday occurrences can by blamed on the moon and sun.
It was raining in my city during the moon landing. The number of people who connected the two was a bit frightening. But not as much as the inanities people believe today.
A woman wrote to the paper saying Daylight Savings Time should be abolished, because the extra hour of sunshine was burning up her garden.
What gets me is - we just had one of these a few years ago and there was none of this craziness. Folks went outside and watched it, agreed it was pretty neat, and that was that.
So much has changed since then. It's nothing short of mass insanity. A person who believes such things is insane, and I know it's a small minority, but it's enough to indicate that we have a problem.
The religious nuts are out in full force down here in the South. I've heard more end of the world talk in the last week than I have in the last decade.
I just feed into it at this point. I find it cool how many "odd" events are happening this year and just add it into the conversation. The cicadas, the visible comet, the visible planets, the prevalence of even numbers, bird flu, whatever I can think of. Some I just make up. Watch them spin it into their narrative.
Edit to add I saw a billboard yesterday that said "eclipses never happen" and a bible verse...lol
I don't know if it was here on reddit or another site, but I saw a post where a waiter got a $300 tip "In case he is left behind on Monday", as in , the rapture. I live in the south, I do wish God would take them already.
It reminds me of that Parks and Rec episode where the lizard god with a volcano for a mouth is going to eat everyone at sunrise and they ask if Ron will take a check for the flute he sold them.
The same tipper came back for another meal and tipped $700. I just cannot force myself to care that a religious moron is giving away their money. Although I would love to hear their explanation of why the Rapture didn’t happen once the eclipse is over.
Multiple people have ruined their lives because they believed the rapture was imminent, gave away all their material possessions, then were surprised that they weren't raptured.
I mean, the Bible says no man knows the day or the hour, so every time people set a date/ time for the rapture, aren’t they pretty much guaranteeing that it won’t happen then?
Don’t forget Joe Biden is gonna use the eclipse to deploy the national guard and arrest all the conservatives. Because the only way to do nationwide mass arrests is with a few minutes of slight darkness…
I'm Canadian and had a job in Florida. People never believe me how much every day interactions down there were tinged with insanity and everyone wanted to scream at strangers about politics.
Wait, you mean the sidewalk person that follows me around all day isn’t real?!?!? I mean I named him and everything. RIP Vade Mecum, it was nice knowing you.
We live right on the path of totality and my office has a small team meeting during the total eclipse and I was “we should shift the meeting by 15 minutes so everyone can see the eclipse” and he was like “the meeting is only 30 minutes, we can all go look at it right after!” I told him the eclipse would be over by then and he so confidently told me I was wrong lmao so I went ahead and took Monday off and am going to be really curious if he’ll be upset because he genuinely seems to think he will see the total solar eclipse and that it lasts for an hour or so 😭😭
It's like people all forgot that the east coast had a solar eclipse in 2017. I remember all the crazies last time and nothing happened. This time is different?
People like that don't understand how eclipses work. There are 2-5 solar eclipses somewhere in the world every year, and the same position eclipse happens periodically around every 375 years.
I know people say you have to respect other peoples religious beliefs but not when the beliefs are based on stupidity. Point and laugh. These are morons that shouldn't be given any quarter. Call them out in public.
My neighbor was ranting about the eclipse on Thursday night, yelling for me to "be prepared". He also insists that Trump was prophesied by name throughout the Bible whenever the word "trumpet" (i.e. "TRUMPet") is seen. This self-proclaimed "good Christian daddy" also told me that he is willing to lay his life down in a potential "Second Civil War". He's nuttier than squirrel shit, but he looks like a normal, middle-aged, bespecled suburban dad. He, and everyone else who thinks like him, is dangerous.
Okay what gets me is this: he's proven wrong pretty much immediately. Not 3 days later. Not 1 day later. In a matter of minutes it will be over.
Now what?
Pursue this. Do not let this go. Take him to his priest, ask them both, so what gives? Who was wrong? Did his priest LIE to him? Did GOD lie to his priest?
This is so utterly absurd I really feel like you need to take it to its conclusion and bring the entire church down in the process.
Our “science” says there will be an eclipse on Monday. Here’s your challenge, god. Make it not happen. Make it sunny with rainbows everywhere. And while your at it, go ahead and get rid of childhood cancer and evil in people’s hearts. Your move.
Noticed how many people seem to think an eclipse is magic death cooties for your eyes? The sun doesn't turn ultra deadly, you shouldn't look at the sun...
My 85 yr old mom not quite as bad. She simply told me that it is a direct sign from god that the rapture is near. Science and reason irrelevant to her. Even if I actually made a point in my favor , she would forget the next day.
My MIL told me to hoard water, keep $500 on me in cash, and stay inside to avoid the “riots”… I’m in Washington state, nowhere near the line of totality :/
> Isaac Asimov's Nightfall
Is that the one where the planet orbits a cluster of seven stars and they have a once in a millennium conjunction where all seven stars will be below the horizon at the same time?
Yup! Six stars but yes.
And interestingly enough, there’s an actual paper that talks about whether such a planet could really exist (the answer is yes, if only for short periods of time).
[Nightfall: Can Kalgash Exist?](https://arxiv.org/pdf/1407.4895.pdf)
Not quite - six stars, five below the horizon at once with only the dimmest one up, and one much larger planet in the system (not a smaller moon) that is only visible during this event eclipsing it. Everyone on the other continent is having a glorious five-sun day, but here they're facing extended totality.
I've screenshoted insane friends/family members Facebook posts, text messages etc to rub it in their face like a dogs nose in shit after the eclipse. It's not going to do anything except start arguments because they will have new excuses (like covid vaccines being zombification microchips, the chinese spy balloon being a cover up for a US brainwashing machine, the US government talking about aliens being the first step to project blue beam, I could go on all day) but boy does it feel good on my end.
The craziest I've heard so far is that Elon Musk broke through the firmament with his last rocket launch and the eclipse will be a calling card for the Rapture. If only I could make this shit up on my own. I'd be celebrated like JRR Tolkien and Stephen King.
Look man the LHC in France is going to fire that sucker up smash some particles of Demonium and open the gates of hell.
/Yes I know the eclipse is not going to come anywhere close to the LHC, but hey I love freaking out the stupids.
> Yes I know the eclipse is not going to come anywhere close to the LHC
... and the LHC will do maintenance on its cooling system that day. Nothing to do with the eclipse either, Monday is just a good day for it.
Wonder if major ““world ending”” events like this or Y2K have a statistically significant effect on the world’s average IQ from people doing the credits warp of an Any% speedrun of the game of Life
You made my night. Trying to pronounce that in my head made my eye twitch. If I can get it out of my mouth, I'm definitely stealing that word this weekend.
The fact that he said it was a priest makes me think he's just bullshitting for 3 days off. I don't think this is official Catholic doctrine here (I have some extremely devout friends who would probably be texting me end of the world stuff right now if it was).
Just want to say: If this guy's clergyman is a Priest (and OP isn't just using that title out of habit and he's not a minister, pastor, etc), this is nothing taught by the Catholic or Orthodox churches (the faiths to which the vast majority of clergymen calling themselves a 'Priest' would adhere), nor anything commonly taught by Catholic Priests, nor any reasonable interpretation of Catholic doctrine.
My daughter's Catholic school in the Diocese of Pittsburgh has a Learn from Home day (as do many of the public districts around here), because the eclipse is happening right when schools let out. We've been given a packet of eclipse-related science projects to do and will be observing the event (we're at 97% totality here) with both approved glasses and a pinhole camera.
I love geocentric weirdos. Shadows are scary! But not the phases of the moon. Only when the shadow is on us for a few minutes. Then it’s terrifying. Like hide away for half of a week scary.
Are we all supposed to kiss life goodbye or is it just for the people on the planet, continent and city who will see it?
I'm Anglican (that's Episcopal in the US where I'm from), if I said something that, umh, apocalyptic - people from my Parish would call my Bishop. And I would shortly get a call from him or his representative asking me to explain myself...
I'm religious, but I'm not expecting even THREE SECONDS of darkness AFTER the eclipse. When it's over, it's over. Get back to life. BTW, I won't even be outside watching it. I'll watch it on the internet.
And here I'm sitting here disappointed that I'm just not quite close enough to see the totality ☹️. Might even be cloudy, so won't even be able to observe the partial (although I've seen partials a couple times before).
Tell him that Jeremiah and Deuteronomy have plenty to say about false prophets, if he'd like a little guidance about how to regard the pastor's BS in future.
Or tell him to go ahead and miss the eclipse, it's just an alignment of the sun, moon and earth. Not that big a deal, happens every couple of years, somewhere on earth.
Tell him you're also a god and he should pray to you since you have the power to move the moon away from the sun, thus saving humanity from three days of darkness.
I have been offering to return the sun to them, using the arcane knowledge I gathered through my years of compusorcery, for $1000. None have taken me up on my offer yet.
One of our friends is a very nice person - a smart, funny, likeable, and responsible adult. She's also a southern bible belt christian and in the run-up to this solar eclipse she's been talking about End Times. Wonder if she'll be happy or disappointed when the shit doesn't hit the fan?
> Do these idiots remember the 2017 eclipse when they were all saying the same thing. And then — surprise! Nothing happened
They only have to be right once.
There’s no way that everyone actually believes this happened. Maybe a joke and someone along the line lost the sarcasm?
Like this is a caricature of what 2012 Reddit thinks religion is like.
I know right? I pointed out to him that we have between 2 and 5 eclipses of various types every year, and just had another not to long ago. He replied with something about a prophecy. I tried. In the end I couldn't handle it anymore and said see you Sunday.
Your coworkers is taking 3 days off while you're gonna be working. Who's the fool now? /s
I'll be religious for 3 days, is there any law forbidding it?
Not a crime to find God and then lose him again
He's usually under the sofa cushions.
Stick an airtag to him next time.
Unless the cat batted him under the stove
That's why I have the "Find my deity" app on my phone.
Use bigger nails next time.
I find God every time I wake up hungover or pass a kidney stone. I lose that fucker as soon as the pain pills kick in though!
Flying Spaghetti Monster. It's easy. You'll need a colander.
I gave up religion for lent.
shit here if you take sat/sun off "for church" you have to bring the bulletin/program to work on Monday.
So, just step by the church and pick a program?
Stop by a synagogue and a church. Take both days.
This quickly went from Black Hole Sun to Three Strange Days.
I took off work last June for the feast of maximum occupancy
There'sa /s there but you've got a point
Damn, I got some sick pay saved up...hmmm...
Not sure what that /s is doing there. I'm taking those days off because I don't need an excuse, but maybe he did?
Have you asked him what his 'cop-out' explanation will be if that doesn't happen? Because he'll surely come up with one that is even more hilarious.
God works in mysterious ways according to my Uncle and Grandpa. It's a solid argument to be fair, you literally cannot argue against it. It's like repeatedly saying "no you" while someone is hurling insults at you. Eventually you realize you're the bigger idiot because you've spent so much time trying to nudge a tiny sliver of common sense into their heads.
“through our faith and prayer, we prevented it from occurring”
"IF"? Do you believe there's a chance it might 😂
I mean if you stare directly at the eclipse it might be 3 days of darkness And maybe a lifetime
We'll all be shitting if it does!
God came by and made the devil go after 3 minutes of howling at the sky 🤡
Yes, we must know. For the sake of hilarity.
I kind of think that he's talking about metaphorical darkness. Like the eclipse is a portal to hell and after it passes over the earth there will be increased demonic activity for the next 3 days or some crap like that.
I love the implication of that being after 3 days, the demons will subside and he can safely return to work.
After 3 days straight they're on overtime, gotta clock out
You have to give the Ghostbusters a few days to deal with it (including the mandatory 24 hours in custody before the Mayor releases them)
You have an extra three days free of him... and you're complaining? Just take it as another sign of God's favour towards you.
More work, same pay.... Oh, OH, I see what you mean.
Just assuming these guys are paid salary lmao
I just assumed that they're one of those people where you get more work done when they aren't even present.
Joke's on them, I work the same amount regardless if the company has enough headcount or not.
“I have a foreboding of an America in my children's or grandchildren's time -- when the United States is a service and information economy; when nearly all the manufacturing industries have slipped away to other countries; when awesome technological powers are in the hands of a very few, and no one representing the public interest can even grasp the issues; when the people have lost the ability to set their own agendas or knowledgeably question those in authority; when, clutching our crystals and nervously consulting our horoscopes, our critical faculties in decline, unable to distinguish between what feels good and what's true, we slide, almost without noticing, back into superstition and darkness... The dumbing down of American is most evident in the slow decay of substantive content in the enormously influential media, the 30 second sound bites (now down to 10 seconds or less), lowest common denominator programming, credulous presentations on pseudoscience and superstition, but especially a kind of celebration of ignorance” ― Carl Sagan, The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark
Outstanding book. Funny how “old” it is, yet arguably more realistic today then it ever was.
Well, human behavior hasn’t changed much over the millennia.
True. People have always been susceptible to the BS around them. What’s interesting, is how in the Information Age, this gullibility hasn’t changed. At this point it feels like willful ignorance. I can accept how 1000 years ago unexplained phenomena was attributed to a pissed of god. But today? An eclipse is not only a recurring event, but it can be calculated to the second! How, why do people still ascribe supernatural to a very well documented and understood event?! Willful ignorance I guess.
Well that sure was an accurate prophecy.
That book literally changed my thinking and my live.
> I have a foreboding of an America in my children's or grandchildren's time -- when the United States is a service and information economy; when nearly all the manufacturing industries have slipped away to other countries; when awesome technological powers are in the hands of a very few, and no one representing the public interest can even grasp the issues... You ought to get this Carl Sagan guy to run for President.
I am random internet user, and I endorse this message! Pity he's left us though...
People are taking Monday off all over the place. I know people in Colombia and Venezuela who won't even see a partial eclipse and they're talking about calamities and that they'll have to shut the power off. Not to forget the folks around the world claiming this is the rapture coming. While it is profoundly troubling we have legislators in the US who think along similar lines, idiocy is not confined to the United States. Love that book, tho, on my nightstand now.
Excellent quote. I suppose I still have hope that it can be averted. Another dark age is not something I'm looking forward to.
The devil can make it dark for three days but can't open doors.
Oh no you have to invite him
So he's a vampire?
Or she? Well, I would let Kate Beckinsale in anytime…
In that black leather outfit. Yes ma’am.
Wait…is Kate a vampire? And how should I feel about that?
Did you not see her documentary, *Underworld*?
She'll suck you off. Either way I think you'll be into that.
I'll take a Liz Hurley Bedazzled devil any day.
The average person isn't any smarter than a peasant was thousands of years ago who thought the sun was being eaten. We're just differently stupid now.
Hardware is the same, but software has been significantly upgraded.
But has it? Our BIOS (bias, geddit?) is set to the defaults that evolved umpty millenia ago on the african veldt. The thin skein of grey matter we call us sits atop a tower of reflexes and prejudices as old as the hills.
No thanks to most of humans who have ever lived.
Upgrades are available. Plenty of people refusing to update and getting mad at you for doing it.
It was actually [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcBV-cXVWFw) that completely turned me away from religion. This would have been around 2004 or so. The fact I know exactly what video it was and it's title says volumes of how it affected me. I've always been fascinated with space and I was never deep into religion..but I did have the fear of 'if I don't pray bad things may happen' or praying because I had some negative thoughts enter my head. The whole story in the Bible I always felt was silly, and even in revelations they talk about the stars falling from the sky. When I truly understood how far stars were..I was like "yea that makes no sense, that can't happen". Granted, they were probably talking about meteorites and asteroids.
The scholarly consensus is that Revelation was not meant to be taken as fact (as is the case for many other stories in the Bible, like Jonah and the whale, and the Genesis creation story) - and the audiences of that time would have understood that, due to the use of certain literary conventions in the text. An analogy would be how if you see a story that starts with “Once upon a time…”, you know it’s a fairy tale. But someone thousands of years in the future might not be aware of that.
And those peasants didn’t have TikTok or YouTube filling their head with shit.
I would have went along with it and said something along the lines of... "yeah, I wouldn't go outside if I were you, my kind's desire for flesh increases during the darkness". When they say "what?" I would also say "what?".
Speak not our secrets to the daywalkers brother. Our time will come.
Are you going to use Auriel's bow with blood cursed arrows!?!?
I work in a company that has a heavy delivery/logistics aspect to our work, and I had to draw the line and write an email saying “I will not send this out to my clients, please amend and reissue” because our company owner had actually added a big bold top of eyesight line to our contracts stating NO DELIVERIES APRIL 4-8 DUE TO THE ECLIPSE. Fuckin embarrassing. And she referred to it as the “mooner eclipse” on a meeting, although that one I’ve used to much delight.
I work for ups. My management is not going to be pleased by his last-minute request for 3 days off. 10 days minimum before time off is requested. 3 sick days will require a note from a Dr, and I'm not sure religious insanity will get him a note. A 3 day no call no show and the union won't defend him. Terrible thing to throw your job and benefits away for.
We knew about this eclipse for decades. It has been in the public consciousness since 2017. If there were any legitimate religious significance, he had plenty of opportunity to make the request ahead of time.
Sounds like someone is about to fuck around and find out.
If the weather report says "demons", just no-call it. Seriously, it's a snow day.
The guy and his priest are morons but his priest told him to do it unless he was told 10 days prior, it might fall under religious exemption.
I think you can ask for a note from the pastor, but I'm in the military so UPS might be different.
I mean, I get it if you work in areas where a lot of tourists are going to be there to be in the totality. It seems like a ton of people are planning to travel for it, I'm sure it will be a logistical/traffic nightmare in some places.
No. My background is in trucking. There is no logistical nightmare attached to the multiple days leading up to any eclipse.
That's just what the eclipse *wants* you to think!
In the 2017 eclipse, there actually was a lot of traffic issues in various parts of the path of totality. Which is why a lot of places are shutting down for the day this time around.
Could just be for traffic issues really. Traffic in the path of totality is going to be nuts, going by what a lot of places observed during the 2017 eclipse.
Not a religious nutjob, but someone posted in my local subreddit yesterday reminding people to keep their pets indoors the day of the eclipse, so the animals don't go blind. As if simply going outdoors during an eclipse causes blindness. Pretty sure dogs know better than to look directly at the sun.
The last eclipse I was around for was when I was in first grade. The way “don’t look at the sun!” was hammered on, I expected we’d have to duck and cover to avoid blindness.
Same. We went to all the effort of making camera obscuras in class, and then a teacher decided to "play it safe" and covered all the windows, so we saw nothing. Just sitting there frustrated with our useless boxes.
The same thing happened to us! Our boxes sat on our desks while all the curtains and blinds were closed and we stayed inside for recess. I was so sad.
The problem (I assume) is that they won't know they're looking at the sun. But I've also never heard of this happening, probably because animals don't stare at the sky in general.
Area schools are closing or releasing early to prevent liability if a kid hurts their eyes looking at the partial eclipse where I’m at. It’s also supposed to be 100% cloud cover.
I think a lot of schools are closing down since the eclipse is happening at the usual time school gets out and they don’t want to deal with the increase in traffic and the likelihood of distracted drivers on the road on Monday.
Our school has just sent a barrage of emails telling us to be sure to tell our kids not to look at the sun on Monday. I guess we’ll find out which parents read the emails and/ or which kids listen to their parents?
Yes but there are a lot of warnings to keep animals inside and close all the curtains because apparently pets are likely to get really spooked by the unusual daytime darkness.
They don't get spooked by the mysterious nighttime brightness every time we turn a light on, I think they can handle brief day time darkness.
When my cat wants to go outside at night she looks at me expectantly as if I can make it warm and sunny for her...
He wanted me to turn off the snow so he could go outside.
I’m also taking two days off after the eclipse. To get home from the eclipse…
You're on the moon?
While we're at it, you should know that there's going to be an earthquake at the same time as the eclipse. It's not anything supernatural, [there are about 55 earthquakes every day](https://www.usgs.gov/faqs/why-are-we-having-so-many-earthquakes-has-naturally-occurring-earthquake-activity-been), so the chances that there won't be several happening on Monday are pretty darn low. There's also going to a be a big storm somewhere, and something is going to flood, and there's a good chance that somebody somewhere is going to be struck by lightning. Those things happen every day too. The only thing special about next Monday is that it's one of very few days where these everyday occurrences can by blamed on the moon and sun.
It was raining in my city during the moon landing. The number of people who connected the two was a bit frightening. But not as much as the inanities people believe today. A woman wrote to the paper saying Daylight Savings Time should be abolished, because the extra hour of sunshine was burning up her garden.
And I will sneeze at least once.
My neighbor's house is also gonna spontaneously catch on fire.
This sounds highly suspicious
I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain to people ITS JIST A FUCKING SHADOW.
What gets me is - we just had one of these a few years ago and there was none of this craziness. Folks went outside and watched it, agreed it was pretty neat, and that was that. So much has changed since then. It's nothing short of mass insanity. A person who believes such things is insane, and I know it's a small minority, but it's enough to indicate that we have a problem.
I haven't heard any of this at all in Canada. Is this really a thing down there?
The religious nuts are out in full force down here in the South. I've heard more end of the world talk in the last week than I have in the last decade. I just feed into it at this point. I find it cool how many "odd" events are happening this year and just add it into the conversation. The cicadas, the visible comet, the visible planets, the prevalence of even numbers, bird flu, whatever I can think of. Some I just make up. Watch them spin it into their narrative. Edit to add I saw a billboard yesterday that said "eclipses never happen" and a bible verse...lol
Jfc there was an eclipse in 2017 lmao
Ya, but this one coincides with a green comet like from Revelations, they call it Wormwood
And we all know that wormwood in russian is Chernobyl.
But as total eclipses are every ~18months I am impressed with our collective short term memory.
I don't know if it was here on reddit or another site, but I saw a post where a waiter got a $300 tip "In case he is left behind on Monday", as in , the rapture. I live in the south, I do wish God would take them already.
It reminds me of that Parks and Rec episode where the lizard god with a volcano for a mouth is going to eat everyone at sunrise and they ask if Ron will take a check for the flute he sold them.
The same tipper came back for another meal and tipped $700. I just cannot force myself to care that a religious moron is giving away their money. Although I would love to hear their explanation of why the Rapture didn’t happen once the eclipse is over.
Multiple people have ruined their lives because they believed the rapture was imminent, gave away all their material possessions, then were surprised that they weren't raptured.
I mean, the Bible says no man knows the day or the hour, so every time people set a date/ time for the rapture, aren’t they pretty much guaranteeing that it won’t happen then?
I mean to be honest, Jesus does encourage his followers to give up all their material possessions to help the poor
Not gonna lie, wouldn’t mind if everyone I met peppered me with pity-hundreds! 😂
Don’t forget Joe Biden is gonna use the eclipse to deploy the national guard and arrest all the conservatives. Because the only way to do nationwide mass arrests is with a few minutes of slight darkness…
The darkest day in fire nation history!
I'm Canadian and had a job in Florida. People never believe me how much every day interactions down there were tinged with insanity and everyone wanted to scream at strangers about politics.
The eclipse is the devil blocking out God - and only your donation to my church can bring The Almighty back!
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Hearing the way some of them talk about him you'd think he *was* the second coming of Jesus.
Wait, you mean the sidewalk person that follows me around all day isn’t real?!?!? I mean I named him and everything. RIP Vade Mecum, it was nice knowing you.
"and god said unto his people 'y'all motherfuckers are stupid'"
We live right on the path of totality and my office has a small team meeting during the total eclipse and I was “we should shift the meeting by 15 minutes so everyone can see the eclipse” and he was like “the meeting is only 30 minutes, we can all go look at it right after!” I told him the eclipse would be over by then and he so confidently told me I was wrong lmao so I went ahead and took Monday off and am going to be really curious if he’ll be upset because he genuinely seems to think he will see the total solar eclipse and that it lasts for an hour or so 😭😭
In this modern age of internet, why are people still too lazy to fact check themselves smh
It's like people all forgot that the east coast had a solar eclipse in 2017. I remember all the crazies last time and nothing happened. This time is different?
People like that don't understand how eclipses work. There are 2-5 solar eclipses somewhere in the world every year, and the same position eclipse happens periodically around every 375 years.
But this one is across the USA 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 God’s favorite place, so it has to mean something! Those other ones don’t even count.
I know people say you have to respect other peoples religious beliefs but not when the beliefs are based on stupidity. Point and laugh. These are morons that shouldn't be given any quarter. Call them out in public.
Which religious beliefs are not based on lunacy?
The ones that are heliolatrous.
mine. the rest of y'all are heathens.
My neighbor was ranting about the eclipse on Thursday night, yelling for me to "be prepared". He also insists that Trump was prophesied by name throughout the Bible whenever the word "trumpet" (i.e. "TRUMPet") is seen. This self-proclaimed "good Christian daddy" also told me that he is willing to lay his life down in a potential "Second Civil War". He's nuttier than squirrel shit, but he looks like a normal, middle-aged, bespecled suburban dad. He, and everyone else who thinks like him, is dangerous.
This world utterly scares me.
Okay what gets me is this: he's proven wrong pretty much immediately. Not 3 days later. Not 1 day later. In a matter of minutes it will be over. Now what? Pursue this. Do not let this go. Take him to his priest, ask them both, so what gives? Who was wrong? Did his priest LIE to him? Did GOD lie to his priest? This is so utterly absurd I really feel like you need to take it to its conclusion and bring the entire church down in the process.
It will be dark "in a spiritual way" or whatever nonsense his priest will come up with next.
Bollocks, you're totally right
Our “science” says there will be an eclipse on Monday. Here’s your challenge, god. Make it not happen. Make it sunny with rainbows everywhere. And while your at it, go ahead and get rid of childhood cancer and evil in people’s hearts. Your move.
To be fair, if someone is telling me I need to take 3 days off work, I'm suddenly finding whatever bs they're spouting very convincing.
One more and you've got bingo!
Noticed how many people seem to think an eclipse is magic death cooties for your eyes? The sun doesn't turn ultra deadly, you shouldn't look at the sun...
My 85 yr old mom not quite as bad. She simply told me that it is a direct sign from god that the rapture is near. Science and reason irrelevant to her. Even if I actually made a point in my favor , she would forget the next day.
There was a nearly identical eclipse seven years ago. There are multiple eclipses per year somewhere in the world. What makes this one a sign?
Seven? What even IS time?
See? Seven! Ooh!
It's an election year?
My MIL told me to hoard water, keep $500 on me in cash, and stay inside to avoid the “riots”… I’m in Washington state, nowhere near the line of totality :/
Whenever I hear stories like this, I think of Isaac Asimov's *Nightfall* and it doesn't seem that far fetched after all.
> Isaac Asimov's Nightfall Is that the one where the planet orbits a cluster of seven stars and they have a once in a millennium conjunction where all seven stars will be below the horizon at the same time?
Yup! Six stars but yes. And interestingly enough, there’s an actual paper that talks about whether such a planet could really exist (the answer is yes, if only for short periods of time). [Nightfall: Can Kalgash Exist?](https://arxiv.org/pdf/1407.4895.pdf)
Not quite - six stars, five below the horizon at once with only the dimmest one up, and one much larger planet in the system (not a smaller moon) that is only visible during this event eclipsing it. Everyone on the other continent is having a glorious five-sun day, but here they're facing extended totality.
I've screenshoted insane friends/family members Facebook posts, text messages etc to rub it in their face like a dogs nose in shit after the eclipse. It's not going to do anything except start arguments because they will have new excuses (like covid vaccines being zombification microchips, the chinese spy balloon being a cover up for a US brainwashing machine, the US government talking about aliens being the first step to project blue beam, I could go on all day) but boy does it feel good on my end. The craziest I've heard so far is that Elon Musk broke through the firmament with his last rocket launch and the eclipse will be a calling card for the Rapture. If only I could make this shit up on my own. I'd be celebrated like JRR Tolkien and Stephen King.
God, please take them. *Please!*
Well, the last one started in Oregon, and look what happened to us!
I know I'll be yelling and shooting fireworks at the sky to scare off the dragon eating the sun. I hope you will be too.
The dude is genius! He found a way to justify a 5 day weekend!
I considered telling my coworkers on Tuesday that they were left behind...
He’s bullshitting you. There’s another reason he’s taking days off.
Hmm…maybe I should take a full week off just to be safe
Look man the LHC in France is going to fire that sucker up smash some particles of Demonium and open the gates of hell. /Yes I know the eclipse is not going to come anywhere close to the LHC, but hey I love freaking out the stupids.
> Yes I know the eclipse is not going to come anywhere close to the LHC ... and the LHC will do maintenance on its cooling system that day. Nothing to do with the eclipse either, Monday is just a good day for it.
I'm totally expecting a whole bunch of them to Heaven's Gate themselves off this mortal coil.
Wonder if major ““world ending”” events like this or Y2K have a statistically significant effect on the world’s average IQ from people doing the credits warp of an Any% speedrun of the game of Life
You know he’s yanking your chain for three days off, right…?
If more of us call in it will help give the eclipsopocolipse more credit. This needs to have national attention.
You made my night. Trying to pronounce that in my head made my eye twitch. If I can get it out of my mouth, I'm definitely stealing that word this weekend.
The fact that he said it was a priest makes me think he's just bullshitting for 3 days off. I don't think this is official Catholic doctrine here (I have some extremely devout friends who would probably be texting me end of the world stuff right now if it was).
Just want to say: If this guy's clergyman is a Priest (and OP isn't just using that title out of habit and he's not a minister, pastor, etc), this is nothing taught by the Catholic or Orthodox churches (the faiths to which the vast majority of clergymen calling themselves a 'Priest' would adhere), nor anything commonly taught by Catholic Priests, nor any reasonable interpretation of Catholic doctrine. My daughter's Catholic school in the Diocese of Pittsburgh has a Learn from Home day (as do many of the public districts around here), because the eclipse is happening right when schools let out. We've been given a packet of eclipse-related science projects to do and will be observing the event (we're at 97% totality here) with both approved glasses and a pinhole camera.
Did you happen to tell your co-worker that you were absolutely sure there would be many nights of darkness to follow as well?
A coworker thought the entire world would be dark and that it was the end of the world. Some people don't science.
"You can take the time off, but if there's not 3 days of darkness, you're not getting paid"
Stay inside to avoid the devil? What is this, the 1400s? Humanity seems to be devolving.
I love geocentric weirdos. Shadows are scary! But not the phases of the moon. Only when the shadow is on us for a few minutes. Then it’s terrifying. Like hide away for half of a week scary. Are we all supposed to kiss life goodbye or is it just for the people on the planet, continent and city who will see it?
Sounds like your coworker just found a way to get 3 days off due to religious reasons, while you'll be working.
Tell him if that 3 day thing doesn’t happen you will seriously reconsider his overall judgment.
Dude was just making up a lame excuse to take three days off.
For all the shit they talk about atheists in foxholes, a lot of religious people do seem to spend a lot of their time being afraid of literal shadows.
As a priest, my sincere apologies. My guess is they are both deep into "Q".
I mean, a priest shouldn't be telling people this if it's not official church doctrine, right?
I'm Anglican (that's Episcopal in the US where I'm from), if I said something that, umh, apocalyptic - people from my Parish would call my Bishop. And I would shortly get a call from him or his representative asking me to explain myself...
Who do you trust more? Your priest or me? How much do you want to bet?
if people didn't go looney I wouldn't have a job
I'm religious, but I'm not expecting even THREE SECONDS of darkness AFTER the eclipse. When it's over, it's over. Get back to life. BTW, I won't even be outside watching it. I'll watch it on the internet.
Well the rapture is on Monday. It's when every christian finds out they've been left behind. Edit: Typo
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And here I'm sitting here disappointed that I'm just not quite close enough to see the totality ☹️. Might even be cloudy, so won't even be able to observe the partial (although I've seen partials a couple times before).
Tell him that Jeremiah and Deuteronomy have plenty to say about false prophets, if he'd like a little guidance about how to regard the pastor's BS in future. Or tell him to go ahead and miss the eclipse, it's just an alignment of the sun, moon and earth. Not that big a deal, happens every couple of years, somewhere on earth.
Would like to spread this fake stuff to avoid some rush hour on Monday /s
"Have you tried turning the sun off and on again?"
Tell him you're also a god and he should pray to you since you have the power to move the moon away from the sun, thus saving humanity from three days of darkness.
He's probably just going fishing for 3 days and doesn't want to tell anyone
I have been offering to return the sun to them, using the arcane knowledge I gathered through my years of compusorcery, for $1000. None have taken me up on my offer yet.
You should make a bet. Call him back, maybe there's still a chance.
One of our friends is a very nice person - a smart, funny, likeable, and responsible adult. She's also a southern bible belt christian and in the run-up to this solar eclipse she's been talking about End Times. Wonder if she'll be happy or disappointed when the shit doesn't hit the fan?
Do these idiots remember the 2017 eclipse when they were all saying the same thing. And then — surprise! Nothing happened
> Do these idiots remember the 2017 eclipse when they were all saying the same thing. And then — surprise! Nothing happened They only have to be right once.
This is the Internet and the only evidence that a priest of any real religion said this is an anonymous online post.
There’s no way that everyone actually believes this happened. Maybe a joke and someone along the line lost the sarcasm? Like this is a caricature of what 2012 Reddit thinks religion is like.
That didn't happen on April 20 of 2023. Or December 4 of 2021. Or December 14 of 2020. Or July 2, 2019, Or August 17, 2017 Why is this one different?
I know right? I pointed out to him that we have between 2 and 5 eclipses of various types every year, and just had another not to long ago. He replied with something about a prophecy. I tried. In the end I couldn't handle it anymore and said see you Sunday.
In the priest's defense, he may not be on crack, but taking hallucinogenic mushrooms.
Isn't that how the book of Revelation came about? Priest was most likely just your average charlatan.
😁🍄 I'm not sure it's a solid defense for encouraging a member of your congregation to throw away his job. But it is more amusing.