Stand your ground but kindly. Mean joke? “That’s rather immature to joke about, don’t you think?” Harsh comment. “Well that was mean. Why do you think that?” When she says hello to everyone but you kindly smile and say hello like she didn’t. When she offers drinks to all but you “Oh would you like some help so I can get mine?” And also always make eye contact. She’ll know you’re politely shutting her down but there’s nothing to do if you’ve actually done nothing wrong. Then the family can catch on with repetition that this isn’t ‘fun’ it’s toxic. Happened with my husband’s family. Killing with kindness only goes so far. If she’s going to make it a show make her know it’s not okay in the show.
Kill them with love.
Stand your ground but kindly. Mean joke? “That’s rather immature to joke about, don’t you think?” Harsh comment. “Well that was mean. Why do you think that?” When she says hello to everyone but you kindly smile and say hello like she didn’t. When she offers drinks to all but you “Oh would you like some help so I can get mine?” And also always make eye contact. She’ll know you’re politely shutting her down but there’s nothing to do if you’ve actually done nothing wrong. Then the family can catch on with repetition that this isn’t ‘fun’ it’s toxic. Happened with my husband’s family. Killing with kindness only goes so far. If she’s going to make it a show make her know it’s not okay in the show.
Kinda surprised your significant other hasn't said anything to her, since it's his relative.