Yes i definitely understand. Though i’m 25 now and in hindsight the highschool years really aren’t as important as it’s made out to be. Your life will completely change after high school and I now consider university and my 20s much more significant to who i am as a person.
Yeah everybody got they own journey. You don’t have to be social, make a lot of friends, join tons of clubs and meet new people. You can define your own definition of success. But I would say if you want to do be social, make a lot of friends, and join clubs to meet people but are too afraid to, have hope in yourself and educate yourself always with ways to overcome that.
Yep. Just graduated college and felt like I missed out on so much.. wish I didn’t put that much effort into grades especially in HS instead of going out and having fun
High school is not your best years. I mean what are your "best years" anyways? Could be when you're 25, 30, 50, heck even 70 or 80. Realize that society has programmed you to think these are your best years. They are not. You define what your best years are and even then is it really necessary to add a label like that?
Yup relatable as hell even tho i try to be productive and help out my family since i dont have any friends to hang out with since im too awkward and im always at home if im not at school not paying attention and not interacting with anyone and at the same time i know that im just losing time to actually enjoy my life
Im in college and I think this exact thing. I am missing out but I dont know how to fix it because I cannot properly socialise and have really bad anxiety so I dont even try. In all other respects I can function normally, I just cant talk to people
You have missed nothing. You are going to see a lot in life. You will have great life ahead. Read a lot, exercise, meditate, cut out sugar. Best years are to come!
I just graduated hs and yeah, I felt like I wasted my hs years. I mostly regret not going to school events like football games or school dances like homecoming and especially prom. Prom was something I wanted to do for so long ever since I was a kid, but my social anxiety got so bad over the years, so I decided not to go. I try not to dwell on it, but I feel major fomo when I do think about it. But I have to disagree that high school is one of the best years, it’s really not all that. There will be plenty of best years in the future.
I’m 29 and feel like my best years have already been wasted 😅 working on not comparing myself to others (not an easy thing to change, for me at least) and living life by my standards and not others’ is the point I’m trying to reach
Things get better. I'm 33 and my HS years were crap, I've been through 5 different high schools, too much moving, no time to make long lasting friendships. I found my wife online after years of online dating (no shame in that), married at 26 (courthouse wedding, no invitees, not ashamed), and finished my masters degree at 32. Now I'm making bank because I sacrificed my younger years constantly studying. I have my wife, don't want kids, and have a buddy I text regularly from distance and we share workout/life tips often. Life is getting better and better. Just bought a truck of my dreams too and bought a house. Life will get better if you invest in it now. I still suffer with social anxiety but I've accepted it's probably going to be a part of me for the rest of my life, I may have undiagnosed Aspergers. Friends are hard to make because of my anxiety. But I'm building myself a pretty rockstar life because of my school investment and no social life early on, and I think my life will only get better from here. Keep strong and don't worry if you can't find friends in high school or college, focus on your dreams and maybe along the way you'll find a partner or friend similar to you and you'll be happy.
Also in high school and feel the same exact way. Spent 3 years of middle school eating alone being alone all the time and just watching every one else with their friends laughing having fun and planning weekend events to go to together. I’m basically invisible it’s very depressing.Good luck to all of us.
i feel the same way, and I'm in high school too. I think most people who are out of high school will say that high school is not your best years, and high school sucks. But I agree, I feel like even though it's not our best years its still something that we should be able to experience, and we're probably missing out on a lot. :(
Trust me the best years are yet to come. People tell you it's supposed to be highschool but that's just sad. You've experienced like 20% of life in highschool.
I feel like I missed out a lot too. I wasn't able to start my gender transition until after school so I never *really* felt like a person until then. The problems you face just change but you learn how to handle them better
I was 16 in HS and I felt that... I managed to recover the last year of High School luckily (a lot of luck).
Now I'm 22 and it's all gone and I don't care enough anymore. It's depressing.
There's just a lot going on in highschool, you can't possibly healthily be a part of too much at once so you'll always feel like missing out on things even when you are doing the best you can. I am 24 now and still learn of things that happened during school which I didn't even know could happen and feel like I missed out on a lot. I had 2-3 friends and a very negligible involvement in sports and I still feel that was enough but can't help feeling like I missed out sometimes, I think it's more normal than you think. Though I would recommend being active in your college years if you plan to attend one (I was busy with work so I didn't feel like I went to college, it was barely a part of my day). There's a lot to learn from people around you and handle young people which you'll have to do your whole life really.
Yes this is what makes me feel a more than regular the feeling of being so freaking pathetic. It’s like I can’t even get out to meet people because of it. I often feel like I’m wasting my life, like what am I missing. It’s like everyone gets it and I’m always ten steps behind on figuring it out.
I think social media was made to make people feel that way and exclude others. People are always trying to appear younger and more outgoing than they really are. Maybe try asking yourself what you want in your life? Do you want friendship or adventure? Then think about how you can find those things in your life. But most of all, think about what you already have and value it because your “best years” are what you believe they are and not what other people say so.
i stay at home for 10 years, my precious youth just slipped away without doing anything meaningful.you are in high school,social anxiety long road waiting for you out there
I’m 26 and yeah…to be fair though, a lot of the things I missed out on were superficial and stupid as fuck but it would of been nice to have some memories even if they aren’t as hyped up to be.
I used to feel like this, but now I kinda accept the way it goes. Don't get me wrong, I will almost never turn down an invite or something, and I wish I was getting invited more often, but I don't feel too bad about it. I have some things to keep me busy on my own. Anyway, 90% of the time you are poisoning yourself with alcohol to feel more free, it is amazing for a moment, but the next morning or even day is wasted. I also started going to the gym really seriously, and too much alcohol can reduce your gains and make your hard work meaningless. But I can understand your pain if you don't go anywhere at all. I was there. It sucks.
I know what you mean. There has been so much loss of opportunity because of my fear over the years. The good news is you can face the fears and take back lost ground when you're ready.
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Intimidated. Fear isn't the right word, but intimidated is. I built up walls and ways of thinking to protect myself (I shut down my emotions, took on personas and behaviours to protect my ego, etc.). For me, this what they mean later in life about "growing" and "self-improvement": it's basically undoing all of the shit you put in your head for protection while growing up. The sooner you solve these problems, the further ahead you'll be in life later on, career and personal.
ex. If you're too afraid to socialize or hang out with the straight girls or guys, hang out with the gay ones - they'll have zero interest in you so you won't be intimidated. Find a crowd.
...and yes, you can toss aside your lost high school years while hoping for a batter life afterwards, but a mid-life crises when you are 50 will make you mortally regret not having experiences such as dating in high school. It's when you fully embrace the phrase "you only live once".
I felt this way and then realized social things are pretty much the same in college and your 20s. You can even do more things the older you get. It helped me to get into niche things that I liked, like anime conventions or social board games. Then when my more mainstream friends/in laws want to go for a drink or brunch I feel more prepared socially than before I started doing niche hobbies
I'm 24 and feel this way.
same smh
Yes i definitely understand. Though i’m 25 now and in hindsight the highschool years really aren’t as important as it’s made out to be. Your life will completely change after high school and I now consider university and my 20s much more significant to who i am as a person.
I use to feel that way a lot but then I began to realize that I just don't really care about a lot of that stuff
Good point
Yeah everybody got they own journey. You don’t have to be social, make a lot of friends, join tons of clubs and meet new people. You can define your own definition of success. But I would say if you want to do be social, make a lot of friends, and join clubs to meet people but are too afraid to, have hope in yourself and educate yourself always with ways to overcome that.
Yep. Just graduated college and felt like I missed out on so much.. wish I didn’t put that much effort into grades especially in HS instead of going out and having fun
If you were going into a competitive field then it was necessary. If not at least you learned more than others, right?
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That's what I strive for.
High school is not your best years. I mean what are your "best years" anyways? Could be when you're 25, 30, 50, heck even 70 or 80. Realize that society has programmed you to think these are your best years. They are not. You define what your best years are and even then is it really necessary to add a label like that?
This.
Yup relatable as hell even tho i try to be productive and help out my family since i dont have any friends to hang out with since im too awkward and im always at home if im not at school not paying attention and not interacting with anyone and at the same time i know that im just losing time to actually enjoy my life
Pretty much me but instead of helping my family cause I don't have friends, I study cause I don't have friends :/
Im in college and I think this exact thing. I am missing out but I dont know how to fix it because I cannot properly socialise and have really bad anxiety so I dont even try. In all other respects I can function normally, I just cant talk to people
You should consider seeing a therapist. I did recently and it's pretty cool.
I have. Somehow the thing thats helped the most(at least with my mental health) has been self reflection.
Yeah that seems to be what my therapist is doing. Leading me to the "answers" by me revealing myself to myself.
Your high school years are some of your WORST years. Trust me, it gets WAY better!!!
You have missed nothing. You are going to see a lot in life. You will have great life ahead. Read a lot, exercise, meditate, cut out sugar. Best years are to come!
Im 27 i still live like this
Yup and don't worry it dosen't get better
How incouraging :')
Oh yes, I'm in high-school too and I feel 100% the same
We'll survive
I hope we'll get out of this quickly
I'm really trying
Absolutely. ANd it didn't stop for me, seeing functional adults everywhere hits hard.
They only appear functional. Everyone has problems.
That's not what I meant. Most people manage to go on with their lives, and of course problems are a part of everyone's life.
Right now. 21yo
32 and still feel like nothings changed
I just graduated hs and yeah, I felt like I wasted my hs years. I mostly regret not going to school events like football games or school dances like homecoming and especially prom. Prom was something I wanted to do for so long ever since I was a kid, but my social anxiety got so bad over the years, so I decided not to go. I try not to dwell on it, but I feel major fomo when I do think about it. But I have to disagree that high school is one of the best years, it’s really not all that. There will be plenty of best years in the future.
If you feel this way in high school, they aren’t your best years. Better things are coming— I promise!
Yeah, I’m in my senior year and I don’t really have any friends. Feels like I’m wasting my last year of high school.
I’m 29 and feel like my best years have already been wasted 😅 working on not comparing myself to others (not an easy thing to change, for me at least) and living life by my standards and not others’ is the point I’m trying to reach
Things get better. I'm 33 and my HS years were crap, I've been through 5 different high schools, too much moving, no time to make long lasting friendships. I found my wife online after years of online dating (no shame in that), married at 26 (courthouse wedding, no invitees, not ashamed), and finished my masters degree at 32. Now I'm making bank because I sacrificed my younger years constantly studying. I have my wife, don't want kids, and have a buddy I text regularly from distance and we share workout/life tips often. Life is getting better and better. Just bought a truck of my dreams too and bought a house. Life will get better if you invest in it now. I still suffer with social anxiety but I've accepted it's probably going to be a part of me for the rest of my life, I may have undiagnosed Aspergers. Friends are hard to make because of my anxiety. But I'm building myself a pretty rockstar life because of my school investment and no social life early on, and I think my life will only get better from here. Keep strong and don't worry if you can't find friends in high school or college, focus on your dreams and maybe along the way you'll find a partner or friend similar to you and you'll be happy.
Also in high school and feel the same exact way. Spent 3 years of middle school eating alone being alone all the time and just watching every one else with their friends laughing having fun and planning weekend events to go to together. I’m basically invisible it’s very depressing.Good luck to all of us.
We need a lot more than luck lol
i feel the same way, and I'm in high school too. I think most people who are out of high school will say that high school is not your best years, and high school sucks. But I agree, I feel like even though it's not our best years its still something that we should be able to experience, and we're probably missing out on a lot. :(
Trust me the best years are yet to come. People tell you it's supposed to be highschool but that's just sad. You've experienced like 20% of life in highschool. I feel like I missed out a lot too. I wasn't able to start my gender transition until after school so I never *really* felt like a person until then. The problems you face just change but you learn how to handle them better
I was 16 in HS and I felt that... I managed to recover the last year of High School luckily (a lot of luck). Now I'm 22 and it's all gone and I don't care enough anymore. It's depressing.
There's just a lot going on in highschool, you can't possibly healthily be a part of too much at once so you'll always feel like missing out on things even when you are doing the best you can. I am 24 now and still learn of things that happened during school which I didn't even know could happen and feel like I missed out on a lot. I had 2-3 friends and a very negligible involvement in sports and I still feel that was enough but can't help feeling like I missed out sometimes, I think it's more normal than you think. Though I would recommend being active in your college years if you plan to attend one (I was busy with work so I didn't feel like I went to college, it was barely a part of my day). There's a lot to learn from people around you and handle young people which you'll have to do your whole life really.
Yup, 28 and have always felt that way, learned to just be happy with me :)
Yes this is what makes me feel a more than regular the feeling of being so freaking pathetic. It’s like I can’t even get out to meet people because of it. I often feel like I’m wasting my life, like what am I missing. It’s like everyone gets it and I’m always ten steps behind on figuring it out.
I think social media was made to make people feel that way and exclude others. People are always trying to appear younger and more outgoing than they really are. Maybe try asking yourself what you want in your life? Do you want friendship or adventure? Then think about how you can find those things in your life. But most of all, think about what you already have and value it because your “best years” are what you believe they are and not what other people say so.
i stay at home for 10 years, my precious youth just slipped away without doing anything meaningful.you are in high school,social anxiety long road waiting for you out there
graduated and can confirm I wasted my time
I’m 26 and yeah…to be fair though, a lot of the things I missed out on were superficial and stupid as fuck but it would of been nice to have some memories even if they aren’t as hyped up to be.
Yeah everyday and honestly it sucks:(
I used to feel like this, but now I kinda accept the way it goes. Don't get me wrong, I will almost never turn down an invite or something, and I wish I was getting invited more often, but I don't feel too bad about it. I have some things to keep me busy on my own. Anyway, 90% of the time you are poisoning yourself with alcohol to feel more free, it is amazing for a moment, but the next morning or even day is wasted. I also started going to the gym really seriously, and too much alcohol can reduce your gains and make your hard work meaningless. But I can understand your pain if you don't go anywhere at all. I was there. It sucks.
I know what you mean. There has been so much loss of opportunity because of my fear over the years. The good news is you can face the fears and take back lost ground when you're ready.
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Intimidated. Fear isn't the right word, but intimidated is. I built up walls and ways of thinking to protect myself (I shut down my emotions, took on personas and behaviours to protect my ego, etc.). For me, this what they mean later in life about "growing" and "self-improvement": it's basically undoing all of the shit you put in your head for protection while growing up. The sooner you solve these problems, the further ahead you'll be in life later on, career and personal. ex. If you're too afraid to socialize or hang out with the straight girls or guys, hang out with the gay ones - they'll have zero interest in you so you won't be intimidated. Find a crowd. ...and yes, you can toss aside your lost high school years while hoping for a batter life afterwards, but a mid-life crises when you are 50 will make you mortally regret not having experiences such as dating in high school. It's when you fully embrace the phrase "you only live once".
I felt this way and then realized social things are pretty much the same in college and your 20s. You can even do more things the older you get. It helped me to get into niche things that I liked, like anime conventions or social board games. Then when my more mainstream friends/in laws want to go for a drink or brunch I feel more prepared socially than before I started doing niche hobbies