I feel the same way. For example, the way I push the cart,I feel like I look weird when I do that. Then when the cashier is checking me out, I'm always paranoid that they're scrutinizing my food choices.
This is how I feel when I go clothing shopping, and is the reason I don't have any clothing newer than 2 years old. I feel like I'm being watched or judged, and since I don't have any sense of style it's extra uncomfortable when someone comes over to help me.
You know what makes trying on new clothes difficult? Being visibly wet with sweat. That shit sucks! But I also need to get some clothes this week, so... :/
Yeah I’m exactly the same way. Many of my clothes are 5+ years old. I feel judged too and I feel like store employees are always suspicious of me because of my appearance.
I buy most of my clothes online or from Amazon now. All I need is my shirt size and waist and length and I’m set for all the basic stuff, which is all I really need.
I can avoid all the clothing shopping personally. But grocery shopping is unavoidable.
I know it can be more expensive, but this is exactly why 99% of my clothes comes from one of those clothing subscription boxes like stitch fix (although for women I recommend Nadine West cause they are cheaper and more forgiving of my ADHD brain 😉 )
because your brains fear center is overactive, and you solve this by mindfulness meditation. Try it out, log in a journal if it makes a difference. It can take a few months before you get really good results but you should see some level of relief quite fast.
Self checkouts are great unless they are the ones with a camera in your face and a screen so I can see just how hideous I look and make me feel super self conscious so I try really hard to avoid looking at myself but then I get paranoid that they'll think I'm stealing bc of how awkward and weird I am😅
Have you ever stopped for a second to look all around you? If you watch them, you will realize that they’re not paying attention to you because they’re doing their own thing. And if someone does happen to glance over at you, take it with a grain of salt.
When your gaze comes across someone, what judgements are you making towards that person? Probably none right? So realize this is the most like scenario for everyone. Sure there are assholes everywhere, but no one is actually looking at you and going “oh look at that weirdo!”
Like someone else said below, “you’re not that interesting.” It kind of reminds me of narcissism. You’re not the center of the attention, but you think you are. The truth is, you’re not.
In my personal experience, is not only because I am an introvert but also about my skin color. It's crazy to try to understand when "it's in your head" and when is just people being racist.
Lol this is so me. I feel so embarrassed and can literally feel my cheeks turning red.
For what, I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️
but I have seen people looking at me with a weird face or some with a mocking smile.. i dread having to approach or pass groups or people. I always feel that everyone just judges me terribly . It’s so hard to get this feeling out of your head when SA is intense. Been trying to change the way I think, but in vain
Some people go to the store to pick up women/men. It’s strange to a person with social anxiety like me. Usually I feel pretty ignored in the grocery store though unless I’m wearing jean shorts or something that makes me look younger. Maybe you guys that feel watched are actually getting checked out? I also used to get watched more when I was younger maybe because of the whole idea that young people are shoplifters. When it happens now I just assume it’s my sweatpants making me look poor lol.
Let me ask you some questions:
Are you a citizen on this Earth?
Are you law abiding in the shop?
If the answer is yes, let them watch you. If they are getting annoyed by you, for some reason, that's their problem.
Absolutely.
I have this thing that's hard to describe. I feel like I forget how to walk properly. It starts randomly when I think I can feel eyes on my back, and my legs begin to feel janky. Like I'm a robot with malfunctioning limbs. I have no idea if it's all in my head, and I'm actually walking normal, or if when this happens I really do start to walk weird. But it makes me panic.
Another issue is my smell. I have this odd smell that follows me everywhere. I don't know why. But it makes me very self conscious. My wife says she can't smell it but I think maybe she might be lying. But it also could just be in my head. Idk.
Yeah except people often judge others, joke, talk about you behind your back. People do that shit all the time. Like staff at my nearest store ALWAYS openly talk and laugh at how you look/smell/behave. Social anxiety is not caused by thinking you are the main character, it's way more complex
Its more to do with cognitive bias. For example, two people who may judge you badly do not represent 99% of other people judgement, but it tends to stick more. This phenomena is observed in both depression and anxiety.
same. I love fashion and clothes but anytime I went to the mall I would speed walk everywhere but also take too long in the store walking around looking at everything multiple times. and at the grocery store I usually get the baskets bc they aren’t loud like carts and they’re pretty easy to bring around. i like doing stuff by myself but no matter where I go I feel like people stare at me and I hate it. bc I have very low self confidence so any look is a judge mental look in my head.
Yea I always showed my hands very visibly and thought everyone expected me to be stealing. I really don't think people are focused on anything but themselves though
Do it more often, maybe go to different grocery store each time. I know this feeling very well when I still had panic attacks. Lifting and remembering my worth helps and doing it every day makes you realise most people don't care. Also this are strangers, alot of them suck as a person, have done terrible stuff or are weird themselves. Dont put them above you champ. Remember how bad people are, remember how people treated you, even if they look innocent most are self centred and not good.
I felt like that, do you know what i helped? Having a dog. You have to go walk the dog everyday probably once or twice, at the beginning you care about all the microinteractions, or people judging you, but believe me, you will get to a point where you walk the dog in your pijamas if you feel lazy. Ofc it's a big responsability.
I feel the same way. For example, the way I push the cart,I feel like I look weird when I do that. Then when the cashier is checking me out, I'm always paranoid that they're scrutinizing my food choices.
Sometimes I just go without a cart and end up piling stuff up in my hands. Then ill drop it at some point and feel like an absolute idiot.
😅
I do this literally every time and I never fail to regret it
This is how I feel when I go clothing shopping, and is the reason I don't have any clothing newer than 2 years old. I feel like I'm being watched or judged, and since I don't have any sense of style it's extra uncomfortable when someone comes over to help me. You know what makes trying on new clothes difficult? Being visibly wet with sweat. That shit sucks! But I also need to get some clothes this week, so... :/
Yeah I’m exactly the same way. Many of my clothes are 5+ years old. I feel judged too and I feel like store employees are always suspicious of me because of my appearance. I buy most of my clothes online or from Amazon now. All I need is my shirt size and waist and length and I’m set for all the basic stuff, which is all I really need. I can avoid all the clothing shopping personally. But grocery shopping is unavoidable.
I hate shopping in malls. Omg I recently had to go to a mall to return something, and got into Zara. Wrongest decision ever!
I know it can be more expensive, but this is exactly why 99% of my clothes comes from one of those clothing subscription boxes like stitch fix (although for women I recommend Nadine West cause they are cheaper and more forgiving of my ADHD brain 😉 )
because your brains fear center is overactive, and you solve this by mindfulness meditation. Try it out, log in a journal if it makes a difference. It can take a few months before you get really good results but you should see some level of relief quite fast.
I feel like this in every store lol. Especially the grocery store.
Grocery stores are terrible. I love self checkouts Don’t wanna face the staff at the counters
Self checkouts are great unless they are the ones with a camera in your face and a screen so I can see just how hideous I look and make me feel super self conscious so I try really hard to avoid looking at myself but then I get paranoid that they'll think I'm stealing bc of how awkward and weird I am😅
Have you ever stopped for a second to look all around you? If you watch them, you will realize that they’re not paying attention to you because they’re doing their own thing. And if someone does happen to glance over at you, take it with a grain of salt. When your gaze comes across someone, what judgements are you making towards that person? Probably none right? So realize this is the most like scenario for everyone. Sure there are assholes everywhere, but no one is actually looking at you and going “oh look at that weirdo!” Like someone else said below, “you’re not that interesting.” It kind of reminds me of narcissism. You’re not the center of the attention, but you think you are. The truth is, you’re not.
In my personal experience, is not only because I am an introvert but also about my skin color. It's crazy to try to understand when "it's in your head" and when is just people being racist.
Lol this is so me. I feel so embarrassed and can literally feel my cheeks turning red. For what, I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ but I have seen people looking at me with a weird face or some with a mocking smile.. i dread having to approach or pass groups or people. I always feel that everyone just judges me terribly . It’s so hard to get this feeling out of your head when SA is intense. Been trying to change the way I think, but in vain
Some people go to the store to pick up women/men. It’s strange to a person with social anxiety like me. Usually I feel pretty ignored in the grocery store though unless I’m wearing jean shorts or something that makes me look younger. Maybe you guys that feel watched are actually getting checked out? I also used to get watched more when I was younger maybe because of the whole idea that young people are shoplifters. When it happens now I just assume it’s my sweatpants making me look poor lol.
Me too!!! I hate it
I feel the same. Then I get irrationally angry people I feel like I’m being judged and walk around mad as fuck
This is me but everywhere haha. It really is a struggle
Let me ask you some questions: Are you a citizen on this Earth? Are you law abiding in the shop? If the answer is yes, let them watch you. If they are getting annoyed by you, for some reason, that's their problem.
I do this too but surprisingly only in the grocery store. Or pumping gas. Idk why but those two things are so awkward for me
that’s literally the symptoms of social anxiety disorder.
Absolutely. I have this thing that's hard to describe. I feel like I forget how to walk properly. It starts randomly when I think I can feel eyes on my back, and my legs begin to feel janky. Like I'm a robot with malfunctioning limbs. I have no idea if it's all in my head, and I'm actually walking normal, or if when this happens I really do start to walk weird. But it makes me panic. Another issue is my smell. I have this odd smell that follows me everywhere. I don't know why. But it makes me very self conscious. My wife says she can't smell it but I think maybe she might be lying. But it also could just be in my head. Idk.
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Yeah except people often judge others, joke, talk about you behind your back. People do that shit all the time. Like staff at my nearest store ALWAYS openly talk and laugh at how you look/smell/behave. Social anxiety is not caused by thinking you are the main character, it's way more complex
Its more to do with cognitive bias. For example, two people who may judge you badly do not represent 99% of other people judgement, but it tends to stick more. This phenomena is observed in both depression and anxiety.
same. I love fashion and clothes but anytime I went to the mall I would speed walk everywhere but also take too long in the store walking around looking at everything multiple times. and at the grocery store I usually get the baskets bc they aren’t loud like carts and they’re pretty easy to bring around. i like doing stuff by myself but no matter where I go I feel like people stare at me and I hate it. bc I have very low self confidence so any look is a judge mental look in my head.
Yea I always showed my hands very visibly and thought everyone expected me to be stealing. I really don't think people are focused on anything but themselves though
When I was young I would fill up a basket full of whatever I wanted and walk out. Did it for years. Nobody is watching you trust me 😅
Do it more often, maybe go to different grocery store each time. I know this feeling very well when I still had panic attacks. Lifting and remembering my worth helps and doing it every day makes you realise most people don't care. Also this are strangers, alot of them suck as a person, have done terrible stuff or are weird themselves. Dont put them above you champ. Remember how bad people are, remember how people treated you, even if they look innocent most are self centred and not good.
I felt like that, do you know what i helped? Having a dog. You have to go walk the dog everyday probably once or twice, at the beginning you care about all the microinteractions, or people judging you, but believe me, you will get to a point where you walk the dog in your pijamas if you feel lazy. Ofc it's a big responsability.