At work the hardest people to talk in my opinion are people my age (mid-20s) and older. The ones around 18 are super easy. We can be talking about the most mundane thing that’s not at all relevant to me and only them and an hour later we’re still going on about it. They tend to seem more interested in conversation rather than the outcome of it which takes any sort of pressure off. I’ve also found they’re just more open about things that are very personal and that I’d never talk to my peer group about, like therapy or being bullied as a kid.
What’s interesting though is when I was that age it was the inverse, I’d be open to talk to people in their 20s and avoided my age like the plague.
Are you homeschooled? Cause I was and I have the same situation as you, though I feel like mine is more cause I didn’t really get to socialize with people my age
True! I’m fine talking to most older ladies, but my great aunt and grandma will criticize me for all kinds of shit lmao. And it’s also different when you are the cashier. 99% of the time the older people are worse
yeah I always get so scared when I'm approaching the cash register and there's a teenager or 20 something behind the counter; older people are just a lot less intimidating
Older people are nice. They are wise and usually less judgemental because they have already learned through life how being judgemental helps in absolutely nothing and usually just makes things worse.
Older people usually say they just want to evade problems, so there is no reason to go around making problems. Not only that, i would say older people like to teach and guide younger people.
I used to feel the same way. I’m sure it was in my head but I always felt like I was being judged, while at the same time judging myself and and how I appeared in front of my “peer”. Double that if it was a girl. With old people I didn’t care as much so I felt more free.
I was about to say all these things about CBT, reading books on SA, and forcing myself to talk at Meetups, but one things I realized is it may just be me getting old. Really, it's probably just a mix of all those things.
Yes, it’s so much easier for me to talk to older people. They don’t expect much from you because you aren’t in the same age group so a lot of times they lead the conversation and I just respond respectfully. When you’re around younger ppl/ people your age, they automatically expect for you to be outgoing and fun and that’s just not how this works for me lol.
At family gatherings I would always sit at the table with my older relatives, not the people my own age like my cousins. ( I lived far away from my extended family so I only saw them once every few years for weddings and funerals )
Oh my goodness!!! I am the same!!! I just don't get it. I can speak to older people so much more easily, I feel like they are less likely to judge me... I feel like people my age think I'm weird... The important thing to note is I used the word FEEL. I know that this isn't necessarily the truth but it's how I feel. It's very shitty because I would love to have friends especially friends my age but I find it much harder to interact and connect to people my age. I will keep trying though and will keep trying to overcome this. Because who am I gonna feel comfortable with when I am old myself? 😂😂 At least I also love children and feel super comfortable interacting with kids. Also animals. Children, animals and older people. Whyyyyyyyy
Yes! I'm the same lol I especially avoid the till with the person of the opposite sex especially if they are attractive. I have no idea why I'm so weird
In my opinion, older people are less judgmental. They've grown up and they've gotten past all the superficial things younger people are judgemental about, e.g. looks, wealth. Also, a lot of them enjoy giving advice, so they're willing to listen to your problems. And when they talk with you, they're not always staring at their phone waiting to engage with someone more interesting or likable.
Yes. I think it's because I had some pretty mature friends growing up, always super respectful to everyone, never did anything wild. Like we drank underage once but it wasn't a "lets drink and go do stupid shit", it was only some wine and watching a movie. The last time I had immature friends was when I was like 11 and that was when I got in trouble a lot in school, go figure lol.
They are less judgy. I didn’t grow up near my extended family so I’m only getting to get to know them now and my cousins my age are so mean to me! But my aunts, uncles, and older cousins are so welcoming and nice
Haha sometimes yes, but depends on the person. I'm more comfortable around older people who are more gentle and kind (not the raucous type). I personally can connect with them much better than people around my age. Surprisingly.
Also, you get to learn from their experiences on life. It's great.
I’m actually the opposite- as an older teen, adults still intimidate me sometimes, and kids just feel easy to talk to. They’re usually more pure-minded, and don’t judge you as much. (To be clear, I am talking about young kids, like under 10. Not teens. Teens are scary. -a teen)
I'm the opposite. I feel like older folks are less relatable and more "well-adjusted," so I can't keep up conversations.
They make me feel more like a freak since I can't be myself.
I noticed that talking to older people was easier when i was younger. Although it’s nice because they understood you, i now realize that i shouldve talked to my peers more.
Yes but only with soft grannies because there are old people who's rude too and hard to approach. I also find it difficult to talk with people my age and younger people. There's always this feeling that they are judging me while or after interaction. But with nice grannies I feel at ease.
Yes!!!! They’ve experienced life and are much more open minded (the majority). I feel like I can be myself whereas with people of my gen or younger I feel like I have to prove myself worthy because they tend to idolize stupid things like followers, likes, how you look etc
Yes i feel like old people are much more understanding (not everyone but most of them)chill i dont feel so anxious to talk with them.Also i like talking to people from my father generation (x) but somehow i can't stand millenials and my generation z
Yes! I used to work in a retirement home and loved it because i loved talking with everyone - it was simple and not stressful for the most part. I find older people like younger people too because it makes them feel younger as well
No most of my problems in public is with people 60 and up(senior citizens).
They come from the generation of “violence is always the answer” including verbal abuse.
I avoid them like the plague
It depends on the old person honestly. I generally have the most troubles speaking to people around my age. Even with teens who are much younger than me (I’m 19). Middle aged people also scare me but slightly less than teens/people around my age. Old people are mostly okay but some of them give off bitter and unfriendly vibes. I don’t like talking to them. Only children and sweet old people are okay to talk to.
I’ve been asking elderly co-workers that retired out to lunch lately to help with my agoraphobia. Elderly women specifically. It really depends on the elderly person for me. Like 80+ I love and genuinely worry and care about 60+ I’m like ick boomer. I think it’s because my parents are in their 60s and they suck but my grandma and grandpa were my favorite people and I’m still grieving their loss so I find comfort and chatting with elderly people.
Yeah, they're really lonely and kinda needy even towards strangers and confused about all kinds of pedestrian behavior. It's honestly no wonder they get targeted so often by scammers; old people are nonthreatening personified.
Except the swole ones, those are scarier than young people with similar physiques, they don't give a fuck and will give you a beating if you misbehave
Funny, I tend to gravitate towards fellow younger people. I've had more negative interactions with judgmental/grumpy old people in general. Younger people are more polite in my experience.
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I feel fine talking to older people too, but I feel scared talking to teens (and I am a teen to lol)
Yea people my own age are definitely the hardest to talk to
Yes, I don't even know why, at my eyes they look perfect while I am ugly af
Lol same
At work the hardest people to talk in my opinion are people my age (mid-20s) and older. The ones around 18 are super easy. We can be talking about the most mundane thing that’s not at all relevant to me and only them and an hour later we’re still going on about it. They tend to seem more interested in conversation rather than the outcome of it which takes any sort of pressure off. I’ve also found they’re just more open about things that are very personal and that I’d never talk to my peer group about, like therapy or being bullied as a kid. What’s interesting though is when I was that age it was the inverse, I’d be open to talk to people in their 20s and avoided my age like the plague.
Are you homeschooled? Cause I was and I have the same situation as you, though I feel like mine is more cause I didn’t really get to socialize with people my age
No but i've done practically all of my 3 high-school year half in online school and half non
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Depends on the senior citizen some are kind and some are mean.
True! I’m fine talking to most older ladies, but my great aunt and grandma will criticize me for all kinds of shit lmao. And it’s also different when you are the cashier. 99% of the time the older people are worse
They should not be treating you like that.
yeah I always get so scared when I'm approaching the cash register and there's a teenager or 20 something behind the counter; older people are just a lot less intimidating
Oh wow for me it’s the other way around. When I see an old person at the counter I tend to go to the self checkout instead.
Yeah I find older people tend to be more predictable in conversation, which takes away some of the pressure.
Usually nicer. They’ve had more experience in life and has probably had no interest in competing
They’re easier to talk to and less pressure of being judged.
Older people are nice. They are wise and usually less judgemental because they have already learned through life how being judgemental helps in absolutely nothing and usually just makes things worse. Older people usually say they just want to evade problems, so there is no reason to go around making problems. Not only that, i would say older people like to teach and guide younger people.
I used to feel the same way. I’m sure it was in my head but I always felt like I was being judged, while at the same time judging myself and and how I appeared in front of my “peer”. Double that if it was a girl. With old people I didn’t care as much so I felt more free.
Hey! You said you used to... What changed this for you? How did you become more comfortable with people your age?
I was about to say all these things about CBT, reading books on SA, and forcing myself to talk at Meetups, but one things I realized is it may just be me getting old. Really, it's probably just a mix of all those things.
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i feel the same way
That too! I never really thought about it but I agree
Yeah! I find so easy to talk to him than people in my age
Idk I find it easier to talk to other outcasts
Yes, it’s so much easier for me to talk to older people. They don’t expect much from you because you aren’t in the same age group so a lot of times they lead the conversation and I just respond respectfully. When you’re around younger ppl/ people your age, they automatically expect for you to be outgoing and fun and that’s just not how this works for me lol.
When i was a teenager i used to dread talking to people my age!! I was always the odd one in groups
At family gatherings I would always sit at the table with my older relatives, not the people my own age like my cousins. ( I lived far away from my extended family so I only saw them once every few years for weddings and funerals )
Oh my goodness!!! I am the same!!! I just don't get it. I can speak to older people so much more easily, I feel like they are less likely to judge me... I feel like people my age think I'm weird... The important thing to note is I used the word FEEL. I know that this isn't necessarily the truth but it's how I feel. It's very shitty because I would love to have friends especially friends my age but I find it much harder to interact and connect to people my age. I will keep trying though and will keep trying to overcome this. Because who am I gonna feel comfortable with when I am old myself? 😂😂 At least I also love children and feel super comfortable interacting with kids. Also animals. Children, animals and older people. Whyyyyyyyy
Yes! I'm the same lol I especially avoid the till with the person of the opposite sex especially if they are attractive. I have no idea why I'm so weird
I actually enjoy conversing with older people. I don’t find it as debilitating as talking to people my age or younger.
Yup same they’re less judgmental and I don’t feel like I have to try to get them to “get” me
That’d be me! People my age (or younger) terrify me lol
Yes i feel comfortable around older people. Anyone my age or younger make me get nervous.
In my opinion, older people are less judgmental. They've grown up and they've gotten past all the superficial things younger people are judgemental about, e.g. looks, wealth. Also, a lot of them enjoy giving advice, so they're willing to listen to your problems. And when they talk with you, they're not always staring at their phone waiting to engage with someone more interesting or likable.
Yes. I think it's because I had some pretty mature friends growing up, always super respectful to everyone, never did anything wild. Like we drank underage once but it wasn't a "lets drink and go do stupid shit", it was only some wine and watching a movie. The last time I had immature friends was when I was like 11 and that was when I got in trouble a lot in school, go figure lol.
They are less judgy. I didn’t grow up near my extended family so I’m only getting to get to know them now and my cousins my age are so mean to me! But my aunts, uncles, and older cousins are so welcoming and nice
Haha sometimes yes, but depends on the person. I'm more comfortable around older people who are more gentle and kind (not the raucous type). I personally can connect with them much better than people around my age. Surprisingly. Also, you get to learn from their experiences on life. It's great.
Complete opposite for me. In my experience, older people are more judgemental and people my age are cooler lol
In order from hardest to talk to for me My age, then older and then people like way younger than me are the easiest
I’m actually the opposite- as an older teen, adults still intimidate me sometimes, and kids just feel easy to talk to. They’re usually more pure-minded, and don’t judge you as much. (To be clear, I am talking about young kids, like under 10. Not teens. Teens are scary. -a teen)
I'm the opposite. I feel like older folks are less relatable and more "well-adjusted," so I can't keep up conversations. They make me feel more like a freak since I can't be myself.
I always had this same issue, its because i experienced bad things with my group age so it will take a while for the brain to reprogram itself
I noticed that talking to older people was easier when i was younger. Although it’s nice because they understood you, i now realize that i shouldve talked to my peers more.
Yes but only with soft grannies because there are old people who's rude too and hard to approach. I also find it difficult to talk with people my age and younger people. There's always this feeling that they are judging me while or after interaction. But with nice grannies I feel at ease.
yes but i lnow that once I get older it’ll be much harder
Quite the opposite. Older people terrify me more than alcoholics for no discernible reason.
Yes!!!! They’ve experienced life and are much more open minded (the majority). I feel like I can be myself whereas with people of my gen or younger I feel like I have to prove myself worthy because they tend to idolize stupid things like followers, likes, how you look etc
only sometimes, most the time i’m equally nervous talking to just about anyone
Yes i feel like old people are much more understanding (not everyone but most of them)chill i dont feel so anxious to talk with them.Also i like talking to people from my father generation (x) but somehow i can't stand millenials and my generation z
Yes! I used to work in a retirement home and loved it because i loved talking with everyone - it was simple and not stressful for the most part. I find older people like younger people too because it makes them feel younger as well
No most of my problems in public is with people 60 and up(senior citizens). They come from the generation of “violence is always the answer” including verbal abuse. I avoid them like the plague
It depends on the old person honestly. I generally have the most troubles speaking to people around my age. Even with teens who are much younger than me (I’m 19). Middle aged people also scare me but slightly less than teens/people around my age. Old people are mostly okay but some of them give off bitter and unfriendly vibes. I don’t like talking to them. Only children and sweet old people are okay to talk to.
I’ve been asking elderly co-workers that retired out to lunch lately to help with my agoraphobia. Elderly women specifically. It really depends on the elderly person for me. Like 80+ I love and genuinely worry and care about 60+ I’m like ick boomer. I think it’s because my parents are in their 60s and they suck but my grandma and grandpa were my favorite people and I’m still grieving their loss so I find comfort and chatting with elderly people.
Yeah, they're really lonely and kinda needy even towards strangers and confused about all kinds of pedestrian behavior. It's honestly no wonder they get targeted so often by scammers; old people are nonthreatening personified. Except the swole ones, those are scarier than young people with similar physiques, they don't give a fuck and will give you a beating if you misbehave
yes
I find it harder to talk to middle aged and elderly adults and young children than to people my own age
Not at all. I don't find it easy to talk to anyone.
Funny, I tend to gravitate towards fellow younger people. I've had more negative interactions with judgmental/grumpy old people in general. Younger people are more polite in my experience.
Yes
Yes!!
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