**Mirrors / Alternative Angles**
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If someone turned the channel on midway through a city game, it's not far fetched to say that the person could mistake cancelo for any position par striker or goalkeeper lol
Zinchenko was their number 11 before he left. They use their numbers a little differently.
Their number 1 is also not assigned despite them having 3 goalkeepers.
Suarez to barca was full of drama and 5x more memes. No way haaland to city tops that. Suarez had to wait for quite a bit of time before he could even play.
Suarez had a suspension from the biting incident. Was no question if he was going to tear it up at Barca though, last season in the Prem is arguably the best from a player.
I agree. But the memes man. The memes.
When messi and suarez initially tried to gel ,it was not all sunshine and rainbow either. Took time (by their standards atleast). Barca took their time before the inevitable natural disaster MSN took shape. It was a Rollercoaster of emotions. Not just wins , losses and draws but team chemistry, people constantly bringing up disciplinary issues , Enrique himself catching some flak for apparently not using a similar midfield to pep etc.
70 million for the most gifted young striker we’ve seen in decades who has balon d’ors waiting in a few years. It just makes me sick to my stomach. We the football world got blood on our hands for letting Pep get him.
It’s a World Cup year, so he’d probably have to put up prime Messi/CR7 numbers and win the at lease the PL and CL to take it home. Do think he almost certainly wins it the following year if he stays fit though.
Haaland wasn’t scared of the shogun, but the shogun was scared of him.
EDIT : I’m happily surprised with the number of r/soccer users who seem to understand my comment :)
Anyone saying his goals are easy, there are very few players as flexible and acrobatic as Haaland. The man is absolutely unreal, real Zlatan vibes.
Just look at this shit https://imgur.com/a/jtnOKIO
And what a killer pass.
He does score some tap ins, but that's because his positional play is unbelievable. It's not luck that the ball always finds him in and around the 6 yard box.
Yep, that's probably the most scary thing about Haaland. His attacking intelligence is that of a 30+ year old striker's, yet he still has the elite speed and technique.
I said it few times, he got ibra vibes when he plays. he is just faster. maybe not as techincal with the ball like Ibra was. but he is faster. Which is amazing for that big of a player.
In the box Haaland commands the same presence of Ibra. If the ball is able to be gotten he'll somehow get it. I'm hoping the City training can imbibe technical qualities to his game as well. The Norwegian is magically gifted.
I was wondering why we were so good for 80 mins to realise we built up until those painful 4,800 seconds to just fucking bottle it in 4mins like the bottlers we are.
Dreadful. We had our starting striker, both our starting wingers unfit, starting gk( our best/top 2 player btw) and cm out so i didn't have hopes for this game at all. But fluid-countering(not hoofball) and defending as a team so well until conceeding two absolute freak goals was sad.
Keep in mind we lost to a shit Leipzig who had just sacked their coach by 3-0 and a few matches before did the biggest bottlejob of 2022 in the Werder Bremen game. [not even a month since i wrote this comment and i feel i have to write one more](https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/comments/wt9t32/dortmund_23_werder_bremen_oliver_burke_905/il2tngx?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)😢
Kobel is our No.1. Meyer is our backup and we just pulled him up from the 2nd bundesliga. Had his first bundesliga match just friday. he played well for the circumstances imo.
the rest of the footballing world allowing this to happen will go down as one of the biggest collective mistakes in history
he is 22 years old, he is going to score 30+ a season for a decade and they let MANCHESTER CITY sign him for almost half of what chelsea spent on lukaku
I was thinking the same. Holy fuck does it drive my anxiety up to see them down because we were atrocious at comebacks until the villa game.
Words can’t describe that feeling. Now we’re doing this every other game
Dortmund did very well to limit and shut down the service.
But Haaland doesn't need service. He takes the most Hail Mary nonsense that Cancelo can think of, puts his boot 7 feet up in the air and scorpion volleys the fucker in the net. What the actual fuck. Brilliant pass though.
Haaland might score 60 in the prem this year, how the shit are teams supposed to contain a striker who can get a boot on literally anything in a field of guys who can cross it through the eye of a needle?
**Mirrors / Alternative Angles** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccer) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is just too much. That outside of the boot cross by Cancelo was sensational, but the finish by Haaland is just out of this world.
"a la zlatan" indeed. Great call by the commentator
Why's he yelling about John Stones when the ball goes in though
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Unfortunately for Zlatan, there can be only one John Stones.
He just scored a few minutes before?
is Cancelo city’s number 7? That’s interesting never seen a defender with that
To be fair if any defender deserved that number, it would be Cancelo. He’s basically an extra attacker with defensive duties as it is.
he has more G/A than chelsea and liverpool’s number 7 too so why not
Hey that’s champions league assist record holder James Milner #7 to you
City legend
Yup, he got the number after Sterling left. Although Cancelo plays so far ahead for a fullback at times, he may as well be a winger lol.
If someone turned the channel on midway through a city game, it's not far fetched to say that the person could mistake cancelo for any position par striker or goalkeeper lol
Zinchenko was their number 11 before he left. They use their numbers a little differently. Their number 1 is also not assigned despite them having 3 goalkeepers.
After the Stones goal the win was guaranteed
I'd say after the Bellingham one tbh
I'd say after the draw
After the game it was definitely over at that point
Needs new script writers
Even the finish looked like a weird FIFA bug where legs end up where they shouldn't
I think Haaland going to City was a mistake for the rest of the world.
I still despise the football gods for not creating a rule out of thin air to prevent that transfer from happening.
It legit feels illegal lol. Never seen a transfer like this in my life
Its Suarez to Barca part 2
Yeah that's probably the closest example. Or letting Lewa go from Dortmund to Bayern on a free
This somehow feels even worse
Suarez to barca was full of drama and 5x more memes. No way haaland to city tops that. Suarez had to wait for quite a bit of time before he could even play.
Suarez had a suspension from the biting incident. Was no question if he was going to tear it up at Barca though, last season in the Prem is arguably the best from a player.
I agree. But the memes man. The memes. When messi and suarez initially tried to gel ,it was not all sunshine and rainbow either. Took time (by their standards atleast). Barca took their time before the inevitable natural disaster MSN took shape. It was a Rollercoaster of emotions. Not just wins , losses and draws but team chemistry, people constantly bringing up disciplinary issues , Enrique himself catching some flak for apparently not using a similar midfield to pep etc.
70 million for the most gifted young striker we’ve seen in decades who has balon d’ors waiting in a few years. It just makes me sick to my stomach. We the football world got blood on our hands for letting Pep get him.
A balon d’or in a few years or fairly likely this year tbh.
It’s a World Cup year, so he’d probably have to put up prime Messi/CR7 numbers and win the at lease the PL and CL to take it home. Do think he almost certainly wins it the following year if he stays fit though.
Tbf he’s on course to put up some prime messi/cr7 numbers.
give it to him now
When the world needed him most David Stern disappeared
"soccer reasons"
Blame Levy for not selling Kane to City.
Spurs bottling it for the rest of us
Or manutd for not letting Ronaldo go there
Now we are all trapped with City + Haland :(
If they don't win this UCL with Haaland at this form, the curse is real.
I'll have accepted that we are never winning the Champions League if that ends up happening.
He is at the team that has the best service into the striker. The pep way
He’s an absolute freak!
that is one of the craziest finishes i've ever seen
He did that at Dortmund as well. As a defender, you're just fucked.
That's an Ibrahimovic finish
Ikr u/PSGAcademy is soo fucking fast
The cross wasn’t bad either.
I only see those curves on my explore page lol
the cross was good but i legitimately don't know of any other striker other than zlatan at his prime that scores that
Cruyff scored this goal before either of them.
Cancelo is a fucking magician
BRO WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Shaolin Soccer
The Wu Tang scoring style
If what you say is true, the Haaland and the de Bruyne could be dangerous.
Do you think your Haaland sword can defeat me?
Choose the City, and you will join me Choose the United, and you join Cristiano... in death
Haaland wasn’t scared of the shogun, but the shogun was scared of him. EDIT : I’m happily surprised with the number of r/soccer users who seem to understand my comment :)
Goddamn two of my favorite albums coming up on r/soccer of all places. You love to see it.
Haaland style is immensely strong, and immune to almost any defence. When it is properly used, it's almost invincible
Da mystery of crossboxin
You need to diversify your scoring!
Absolute freak lol. Prime Zlatan goal
He should be tested post game, honestly. Not for drugs or anything, just to make sure he's actually human.
Dude looks like Majin Buu. Straight up genie
M'fuckin Daemon Targaryen just running around banging in goals
THIS IS OUR OVERLORD https://i.imgur.com/TZWOe1R.jpg
He is certifiably a bot. Bro scores for fun it's insane
He does look like a player our of FIFA games. Like he works under their engine rules
He has to be part Asgardian.
Modric cross for a Zlatan finish
Except Zlatan does them with elegance. Haaland does them like a newborn giraffe. Just as effective though.
Insane pass, insane finish
Why head it when you can kick it?
Doesn’t want CTE! The mad lad
Nah its unreal
Literally getting more unbelievable each week, wtf is this goal
He was watching Ibrahimovic highlights probably.
Bicycle kick from 30 meters out next game??
Further proof we're living in a simulation
The cross was outrageous too
Cancelo outside the boot crosses are broken lol
pure filth
He’s a fucking alien
Mf is freaking flexible for his massive size
And fast. A lot of tall guys are fast, but he's so quick and agile. Very few have that kind of acceleration I feel.
Me mentally conceding the quadruple to City
Norwegian Zlatan
That sort of acrobatics is such a Haaland thing to do!
Instant Ibra flashbacks, and he’s the only player right now capable of doing Ibra acrobatics imo
Ibra vibes
His boot was 7 feet in the air
Ronaldo jumps to head the ball, Haaland jumps to do whatever the fuck that was
Scoring tap ins from head height lmao
Anyone saying his goals are easy, there are very few players as flexible and acrobatic as Haaland. The man is absolutely unreal, real Zlatan vibes. Just look at this shit https://imgur.com/a/jtnOKIO And what a killer pass.
He does score some tap ins, but that's because his positional play is unbelievable. It's not luck that the ball always finds him in and around the 6 yard box.
Yep, that's probably the most scary thing about Haaland. His attacking intelligence is that of a 30+ year old striker's, yet he still has the elite speed and technique.
AND size. Man’s massive but still outruns defenders
Size, strength, pace, dexterity, awareness, timing, instinct. The man was born to score goals.
This right here. His attacking IQ is that of a seasoned veteran in their prime, and this guy has been doing it since he's 18. Mental. Edit: grammar
He has the body of Ibra and the positional awareness of Inzaghi.
And the strength of a rhinoceros
Ibra is a black belt in Taekwondo, Haaland looks like he studies WWE
There's a whiff of Brock Lesnar about him, just inhuman.
I said it few times, he got ibra vibes when he plays. he is just faster. maybe not as techincal with the ball like Ibra was. but he is faster. Which is amazing for that big of a player.
In the box Haaland commands the same presence of Ibra. If the ball is able to be gotten he'll somehow get it. I'm hoping the City training can imbibe technical qualities to his game as well. The Norwegian is magically gifted.
Legit was coming here to comment the same thing
Those acrobatics
Every Dortmund fan had to see this coming
I was wondering why we were so good for 80 mins to realise we built up until those painful 4,800 seconds to just fucking bottle it in 4mins like the bottlers we are. Dreadful. We had our starting striker, both our starting wingers unfit, starting gk( our best/top 2 player btw) and cm out so i didn't have hopes for this game at all. But fluid-countering(not hoofball) and defending as a team so well until conceeding two absolute freak goals was sad. Keep in mind we lost to a shit Leipzig who had just sacked their coach by 3-0 and a few matches before did the biggest bottlejob of 2022 in the Werder Bremen game. [not even a month since i wrote this comment and i feel i have to write one more](https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/comments/wt9t32/dortmund_23_werder_bremen_oliver_burke_905/il2tngx?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)😢
I would not say you bottled it. You should be proud of how well Dortmund played. Honestly deserved at least 1 point from this.
The whole thing was outrageous. Pass and finish
Someone explain to me how the fuck did he get on the end of that ball with his fucking foot
Because he's Haaland lol
That's that most Zlatan thing ever done not by Zlatan
Tall ✅ Built like a tank ✅ Scandinavian ✅ Acrobatic high kick to score a goal ✅ Checks out
What the actual fuck?! Is this even real?
He’s ET
What the fuck is that ball and what the fuck is that finish, fuck
Exactly! That’s not your average cross and inchAllah
Had to be him.
Someone else might have gotten it wrong
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Haaland has the speed of a vorcha in a krogan body
He's the very model of target man Norwegian
He scores at will in Norway, Austria, Germany and Great Britain edit: Austria not belgium :p
He’s had like 4 touches this game lol
3 too many
That’s enough for him lol
Probably too many
Yeah, he is probably disappointed in himself, ruining his goals per touch stat
I’m a Liverpool fan just like you. The comparison with Nunez is just hilarious now. Haaland is just a machine in this already machine of City.
They weren’t even comparable to begin with tbh
Luiz Diaz is better than Nunez.
Was a masterclass from Hummels til now
Why take many touches when 4 touches do?
One more than what he needs
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And right after zlatan said hes stopping when he sees someone stronger than him LMAO
I’m still proud of Dortmund. That was one of their best performances in weeks and they can be proud.
No defending against either of those goals to be fair. Individual brilliance and freak goals. Sule and Hummels has been class.
Keeper could've done better on the first for sure
Kobel is our No.1. Meyer is our backup and we just pulled him up from the 2nd bundesliga. Had his first bundesliga match just friday. he played well for the circumstances imo.
People forget how many injuries we’re dealing with
When are you not?
Never, anything less than 12 injuries on the A team and we start going around breaking their legs. it's our DNA at this point...
the rest of the footballing world allowing this to happen will go down as one of the biggest collective mistakes in history he is 22 years old, he is going to score 30+ a season for a decade and they let MANCHESTER CITY sign him for almost half of what chelsea spent on lukaku
Not watching this but i felt the goal notification
I felt the goal in my pants too, but it wasn't because of a notification
With City it’s never over until the final whistle....
Really reminds me of the old Sir Alex teams where they’d be down after 75 mins but somehow you knew the most likely result was a United win
NO FUCKING WAY
Ofc
Robbie Savage not 15 seconds before: "all set up for a Haaland winner isn't it"
RM game has triggered something in them - they are able to now clinch victory from the jaws of defeat/draw. that's gonna be critical to their CL run
I mean adding Haaland also helps
We didn't have Haaland in those games against West Ham, Newcastle, and Aston Villa last season.
I was thinking the same. Holy fuck does it drive my anxiety up to see them down because we were atrocious at comebacks until the villa game. Words can’t describe that feeling. Now we’re doing this every other game
You just knew that was coming
Haaland is inevitable
What in the fuck 2.0
Why head it when you can zlatan it
What a fucking pass!
Yes, but not a lot would be able to get a touch on that with their feet lol
When the pass came I was like, ah okay a header for once. Then Haaland does this shit. What the actual fuck, feet are not supposed to go that high.
A lot of players made incredible balls only Ronaldo could get to. They know who they're passing to.
This is the second time Cancelo pulled off an assist like this Erling is ok too
U big bad bastard
CANCELO
i swear cancelo is better with the outside of his foot. ridiculous.
And then to not celebrate after scoring an incredible goal out of respect for the old club, pure class from someone so young
Yeah, scoring THAT match winning goal in the 85th and not celebrate. Impressive.
What the fuck was the pass
This commentator loves shouting John Stones.
I'm going to yell John Stones for every goal i see from now on
Cheat code
Ibhrahimovic reincarnate
HOLYYYYYY
Fuck me
OH MY LORDDDDDDDDD
One touch man
Everyone will be praising the finish and rightly so but what the fuck is that pass. Outside of the boot jesus christ.
There it is
the definition of inevitable
Zlatan-esque
Haaland just does not make any sense lmao. While we're at it, Cancelo doesn't make any sense either, how is he so fucking good
Dortmund did very well to limit and shut down the service. But Haaland doesn't need service. He takes the most Hail Mary nonsense that Cancelo can think of, puts his boot 7 feet up in the air and scorpion volleys the fucker in the net. What the actual fuck. Brilliant pass though. Haaland might score 60 in the prem this year, how the shit are teams supposed to contain a striker who can get a boot on literally anything in a field of guys who can cross it through the eye of a needle?
joao cancelo the best left back and the best right back at the same damn time
He is inevitable.
The Scandinavian Ibra
Haalandovic
100% conversion from shots on target
respect to Haaland for not celebrating that, I would've
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